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This thread is for wizards who are permanent, unwilling students in highschool 2.0.
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Haven't and don't plan on going to class this last month before the year ends. My interest in my major is zero, and I'm not getting in any more debt than I have to retaking courses 50 times before I pass or I get kicked out. For now I'm just working on my terrible writing and looking into community college or some type of job until I can figure out where to go next.
ALMOST GRADUATED UNI
then only 6 more years of school while working full time
At least people look at me on professional merit instead of how normie I am expected to be with parties and such
then only 6 more years of school while working full time
At least people look at me on professional merit instead of how normie I am expected to be with parties and such
I paid a classmate to write a programming project for me. Didn't even know a service like this exist. It's nice but there's obviously the problem of the cost accumulating in the long run and my lack of income.
Just started a Language Studies degree, but fuck! I thought it would be easier compared to STEM but the problem is not the subject per se, but myself. I hate writing, I can't read something like Plato without spacing out and I can't stop procrastinating.
Everyday I think about suicide, but there is no will within me to accomplish this either.
I could try a public job for money and stability, but that also requires study and I don't have motivation to do it.
Everyday I think about suicide, but there is no will within me to accomplish this either.
I could try a public job for money and stability, but that also requires study and I don't have motivation to do it.
is it harder to do uncomfortable things if they're abstract, like doing math homework in uni than if your deeds are physical like carrying heavy bags or wage labor. i think that might be what makes education difficult
>>199231
some things that might help
>watch media in only that language dub/sub
>use commercial products to augment language proficiency (I suggest pimsleur method)
>>199235
>is it harder to do uncomfortable things if they're abstract, like doing math homework in uni
not sure if intentional question, but it can be harder, Since I work a blue collar job AND am doing STEM meme, I have to devote more time to learning the concepts.
some things that might help
>watch media in only that language dub/sub
>use commercial products to augment language proficiency (I suggest pimsleur method)
>>199235
>is it harder to do uncomfortable things if they're abstract, like doing math homework in uni
not sure if intentional question, but it can be harder, Since I work a blue collar job AND am doing STEM meme, I have to devote more time to learning the concepts.
i ruined my groups presentation by not showing up (overslept)
its good to know no one will talk to me anymore
its good to know no one will talk to me anymore
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I knew it!
A couple of my professors gave me a hug on the last day of classes this semester, it made me feel bad because I didn’t get 100% in every class so I didn’t feel like I deserved their affection, my mom says it’s because I’m endearing, but I’m just quiet and occasionally ask or answer questions, it feels weird to be noticed like this
Just finished my last final today. Taking summer off then going back in the fall. Taking a Math & Theatre course then. Online classes both of them.
failed this semester entirely. took 4 courses, dropped 1 immediately off the bat because we’d have to give presentations. failed the 2nd one because again, group projects and presentations so i stopped going. 3rd one was an SJW professor and I actually showed up to it regularly and wrote papers for the class, and even did a presentation (i took lots of xanax and adderall beforehand and cant even remember it, other than everyone in the room giving me funny glances). I was very depressed and sick and missed a day of class, turned out that was the day she gave the final exam. I missed it so I failed! Nice! I emailed her and explained that I was sick and if there was any way i could retake it, especially since she gave the final exam a full week earlier than the date listed on the syllabus. In so many words she told me to go fuck myself, i know she didnt like me because I was weird and it was a small class where every normie grouped and and joked together but i just sat alone the entire time, so obviously she was more than happy to fail me. Only class left is calculus but to be honest i am horribly behind and have lost all motivation and willpower. The final exam is tomorrow and i’ve had an entire week to prepare but I haven’t studied at all, I just can’t cqre anymore.
I’m giving up on college. Think i’m gonna try and just learn html and javascript and hope for the best with finding a job without a degree.
I’m giving up on college. Think i’m gonna try and just learn html and javascript and hope for the best with finding a job without a degree.
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im so sick and tired of learning stuff, i wanna shut off my brain forever
Hiding on the toilet to avoid a prof whose class I dropped out of this semester. Jolly times.
failed my class, i had already dropped out of all the others
i hate university but i cannot quit it; i am an incredibly stubborn person
when thinking about this contradiction, and futility of me getting an education something in my brain broke last night; i can't feel bad feelings anymore
i will try to channel my stubbornness to study math 12 hours a day, like my grandma and some other boomers I have talked to in the past
i hate university but i cannot quit it; i am an incredibly stubborn person
when thinking about this contradiction, and futility of me getting an education something in my brain broke last night; i can't feel bad feelings anymore
i will try to channel my stubbornness to study math 12 hours a day, like my grandma and some other boomers I have talked to in the past
Over half a year since I graduated with a masters in AI with an award for top marks. Still NEET, can't even bring myself to apply for any jobs. I think i'll kill myself soon. If you're torturing yourself to study when you will be miserable to put on a suit and beg normalfags to let you be a slave then you should think deeply about your future.
>>201064
Damn man, that's a huge accomplishment just to throw away like that. I hope you can try and use that skill somehow, maybe teach on YouTube the basics and make some money. Good luck.
Damn man, that's a huge accomplishment just to throw away like that. I hope you can try and use that skill somehow, maybe teach on YouTube the basics and make some money. Good luck.
>>201064
Stay in academia perhaps? Since you're doing well in school, might as well just get a PhD or two, become a professor or researcher.
Stay in academia perhaps? Since you're doing well in school, might as well just get a PhD or two, become a professor or researcher.
>>201076
I avoided doing any thesis because it required public speaking, so I'm probably not eligible to enter a PhD
I avoided doing any thesis because it required public speaking, so I'm probably not eligible to enter a PhD
>>201064
>gets a master in an in demand field
>cant find a job
I don't believe this. I am starting to think these posts are made by NEETs to scare college goers.
>gets a master in an in demand field
>cant find a job
I don't believe this. I am starting to think these posts are made by NEETs to scare college goers.
>>201078
Not him, but there are factors other than qualification that go into getting a job. If you don't have connections, you have to go through the grueling process of standing out from all the other candidates and also have an acceptable social personality for people to be willing to work with you.
(In all likelihood tho, it seems he just hasn't been applying for jobs).
Not him, but there are factors other than qualification that go into getting a job. If you don't have connections, you have to go through the grueling process of standing out from all the other candidates and also have an acceptable social personality for people to be willing to work with you.
(In all likelihood tho, it seems he just hasn't been applying for jobs).
>>201078
>>201081
If you read the post again it literally says I havent applied for anything.
AI jobs are all evil data mining shit, and they all expect a 27 year old to have experience and be able to talk to people. Even for this supposedly in-demand field there are hardly any positions posted online that don't demand years of experience
>>201081
If you read the post again it literally says I havent applied for anything.
AI jobs are all evil data mining shit, and they all expect a 27 year old to have experience and be able to talk to people. Even for this supposedly in-demand field there are hardly any positions posted online that don't demand years of experience
>>201091
I applied to a programming job (didn't get it) that required 5 years of experience (I have none) and they gave me an in person interview. I failed so bad, I was really nervous standing in front of strangers attempting to solve coding problems. They weren't too hard (reverse a string in place, find a cycle in a linked list, code a pre-order traversal) but I was so damn nervous it ruined the interview.
My point is, the experience requirements are more of a wish list. If it's truly in demand, they'll take what they can get.
I applied to a programming job (didn't get it) that required 5 years of experience (I have none) and they gave me an in person interview. I failed so bad, I was really nervous standing in front of strangers attempting to solve coding problems. They weren't too hard (reverse a string in place, find a cycle in a linked list, code a pre-order traversal) but I was so damn nervous it ruined the interview.
My point is, the experience requirements are more of a wish list. If it's truly in demand, they'll take what they can get.
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Started my Linguistics degree this year, and I'm hating it. Chose it because leraning languages is what I supposedly do best; plus, since I'm from a non-English speaking country, the course, I thought, would be two times easier for me, because my English is rather good, and therefore, I should be able to breeze through the course, the part of it that has to do with learning English, at least.
But oh fuck, it doesn't fit me at all. We have lectures on History of England and the US, Angloamerican literature and History of our Homeland; the choice of subjects is pretty bizarre, but at least they're there for the first two semesters only. As for subjects that have to do with language study, we have six English lessons a week, and only three lessons of my language of choice, not to mention that the teacher, who isn't a native speaker, is young and inexperienced with teaching, teaches two of the three classes we have. It's both a blessing and a curse, considering the clusterfuck that turned out to be the English classes. Three of them are specialized, focusing on grammar, phonetics and writing. The first two bring me immense pain, especially phonetics. The teacher, despite her age, is absolutely anal and demanding about the subject which I find to be pointless for the most part. The first semester was just basic stuff like learning to pronounce phonemes properly and training to do that by reading various texts, it was helpful for everyone. But, along with that, we had to learn each vowel and consonant's classification and articulation plus all the phonetic phenomena. When the exam week came, I got a high score on the oral part, but bombed the tests focusing on theory, got the bare minimum needed to pass, and actually ended up losing my scholarship because of this single subject and its hard to remember theory that explains otherwise intuitive things in an overly complicated manner. The second semester turned out to be even worse. We've been learning Intonation patterns. We've been learning, essentially, how to talk like a human being, a really basic thing, the practical side of which I nail near-perfectly, but the theoretical part of which is an absolute disaster. The test is this Monday, actually, going to hope on the bare minimum, again. Thankfully, we'll get another phonetics teacher next year.
I touched upon Grammar a bit, and it's all the same shit. Practically, I'm generally a-okay except for a few slips here and there, but when it comes to talking about English in fancy terms, explaining grammatical phenomena, I simply can't.
The cherry on top is Linguistics. I genuinely don't get the point of this science. It's borderline philosophy, talking of problems no one had even thought existed, and overcomplicating things that shouldn't be such, heaping pointless difficult to remember term over another pointless difficult to remember term. Studying elementary Semantics and listening to a lecture by some foreign linguist on Cultural linguistics really made me question my life choices.
And it's not like I'm going to be showered with money post-graduation, it's more than likely I'll be struggling to find a job after this, and my only choice would be to continue my education and go for the magister degree to be able to teach, either in schools, in which case me enduring all this pointless bullshit was essentially in vain and I'm also going to be bothered by little shitheads and live on scraps, or universities, in which case I'm going to go bald in my early-to-mid thirties, overwork consistently and have the usual "Kill me already" look most of the university teachers sport.
God damn it I hate all of this, but I've been inculcated with the idea that a life worth living is one where I have a degree and work an office job, otherwise I'm a failure; but that's an entirely different topic for an entirely different post.
But oh fuck, it doesn't fit me at all. We have lectures on History of England and the US, Angloamerican literature and History of our Homeland; the choice of subjects is pretty bizarre, but at least they're there for the first two semesters only. As for subjects that have to do with language study, we have six English lessons a week, and only three lessons of my language of choice, not to mention that the teacher, who isn't a native speaker, is young and inexperienced with teaching, teaches two of the three classes we have. It's both a blessing and a curse, considering the clusterfuck that turned out to be the English classes. Three of them are specialized, focusing on grammar, phonetics and writing. The first two bring me immense pain, especially phonetics. The teacher, despite her age, is absolutely anal and demanding about the subject which I find to be pointless for the most part. The first semester was just basic stuff like learning to pronounce phonemes properly and training to do that by reading various texts, it was helpful for everyone. But, along with that, we had to learn each vowel and consonant's classification and articulation plus all the phonetic phenomena. When the exam week came, I got a high score on the oral part, but bombed the tests focusing on theory, got the bare minimum needed to pass, and actually ended up losing my scholarship because of this single subject and its hard to remember theory that explains otherwise intuitive things in an overly complicated manner. The second semester turned out to be even worse. We've been learning Intonation patterns. We've been learning, essentially, how to talk like a human being, a really basic thing, the practical side of which I nail near-perfectly, but the theoretical part of which is an absolute disaster. The test is this Monday, actually, going to hope on the bare minimum, again. Thankfully, we'll get another phonetics teacher next year.
I touched upon Grammar a bit, and it's all the same shit. Practically, I'm generally a-okay except for a few slips here and there, but when it comes to talking about English in fancy terms, explaining grammatical phenomena, I simply can't.
The cherry on top is Linguistics. I genuinely don't get the point of this science. It's borderline philosophy, talking of problems no one had even thought existed, and overcomplicating things that shouldn't be such, heaping pointless difficult to remember term over another pointless difficult to remember term. Studying elementary Semantics and listening to a lecture by some foreign linguist on Cultural linguistics really made me question my life choices.
And it's not like I'm going to be showered with money post-graduation, it's more than likely I'll be struggling to find a job after this, and my only choice would be to continue my education and go for the magister degree to be able to teach, either in schools, in which case me enduring all this pointless bullshit was essentially in vain and I'm also going to be bothered by little shitheads and live on scraps, or universities, in which case I'm going to go bald in my early-to-mid thirties, overwork consistently and have the usual "Kill me already" look most of the university teachers sport.
God damn it I hate all of this, but I've been inculcated with the idea that a life worth living is one where I have a degree and work an office job, otherwise I'm a failure; but that's an entirely different topic for an entirely different post.
>>201146
>teacher, who isn't a native speaker, is young and inexperienced with teaching
I had to deal with a teacher like this for a class on assembly language I had to take. I failed of course. The guy was knowledgeable but was just awful at teaching. Lectures would be him rambling on about the minute details of ARM, we'd get behind so he'd end up rushing through things near the end of class, and he spoke in the slowest and most monotone way possible. It reached the point where after the first exam I had no fucking clue what we were even learning anymore. Office hours didn't help because he explained things the same way he did in class so I just ended up pretending I understood and went on my way because it wasn't helping.
On academic probation now, but I don't have enough money to continue with this shit anyway. God I want to die.
>teacher, who isn't a native speaker, is young and inexperienced with teaching
I had to deal with a teacher like this for a class on assembly language I had to take. I failed of course. The guy was knowledgeable but was just awful at teaching. Lectures would be him rambling on about the minute details of ARM, we'd get behind so he'd end up rushing through things near the end of class, and he spoke in the slowest and most monotone way possible. It reached the point where after the first exam I had no fucking clue what we were even learning anymore. Office hours didn't help because he explained things the same way he did in class so I just ended up pretending I understood and went on my way because it wasn't helping.
On academic probation now, but I don't have enough money to continue with this shit anyway. God I want to die.
>>201146
I'm in the same situation. I am studying the first semester and I have to write (of course, it is a language course). The question is: why am I studying this if I don't like writing? I don't know either, I was lost and stil am. I have to write an abstract of a technical language text, but I can't force myself to read or write. It seems to preferable to talk and think about my misery.
I'm in the same situation. I am studying the first semester and I have to write (of course, it is a language course). The question is: why am I studying this if I don't like writing? I don't know either, I was lost and stil am. I have to write an abstract of a technical language text, but I can't force myself to read or write. It seems to preferable to talk and think about my misery.
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[blog]
after all, you are the least dumb guy in class, right?
you better leave it for the last, still got two months left and so much to do with nearer deadlines
you've done it many times before, no problem. that class is piss-easy
but it seems you will have to take that piss-easy class again if you don't get your ass to work ASAP!
maybe this time is not like past semesters? i mean, it's getting harder and time is getting lesser.
but nothing you can't handle. i mean, you're that guy everyone asks for help. sometimes even teachers reach you for help from time to time. a hurried schedule and the quantious mechanical work needed can be helped by already knowing how-to and planning ahead
well, it seems doing the work of an entire semester takes a little bit longer than thought. maybe you should have repaired your db manager the very first weekend.
or maybe you should have bought a usb keyboard instead of being a lazy shit for five months straight
but no need to stress, after all, that class is piss-and-shit-easy, right?
everyone passed thanks to your help!
but time's passed by and little is left
you gotta get that job done quick, mate
most of everything else is done, only thing left is that project from the third unit
that one was a real pain in the ass wasn't it? man, gotta hurry!
but it's not like there's gonna be any setbacks in the meanwhile, right?
maybe you are a little bit dumber than you thought
this ain't funny anymore
getting the final networking class's project took a lil bit longer than thought
three days left would be enough if i didn't feel like a loosey clockwork motor
if it wasn't for the provigil and that gram of meth you have from months ago you wouldn't have made it in this class; and without them you ain't gonna make it in this last one
but you had months beforehand, retard
you knew it was unavoidable
that shit was originally intended to be done by an entire team, not by you alone
and you only have around 60 hours left
but you alone is more than enough, right?
after all, you are not clinically retarded!
last time you got at least six hours of sleep, mate?
is it reasonable to think you can do a team's work of two months in three days?
did you know this was preventable? it most certainly was
it was just a matter of not doing it at the very fucking last moment!
and how is it going? how much did that lil' problem set you back? 6-7 hours?
are you tired? does your chest feel funny?
getting nervous ain't you?
big day's here, mate!
you didn't finish it, but the teacher is going to pass you anyways, right? all five units?
he knows you know your shit, you've taken three classes with him before
he's gonna value that
but nevermind, it seems that general power failure affected the school too
but that gives you one more fucking day! you ain't gonna take any chances
it's like a fucking miracle!
and cautious when driving back home, you haven't slept for who-knows how long
good thing you have that piece of paper full of meth disolving in your ass
it burns like mad, but hey, it's better than falling asleep on the road
or even worse, falling asleep before class and failing in such a retarded manner
finally home! safe and sound, without dying and the stuff
time to get serious, or else!
after all, you are the least dumb guy in class, right?
you better leave it for the last, still got two months left and so much to do with nearer deadlines
you've done it many times before, no problem. that class is piss-easy
but it seems you will have to take that piss-easy class again if you don't get your ass to work ASAP!
maybe this time is not like past semesters? i mean, it's getting harder and time is getting lesser.
but nothing you can't handle. i mean, you're that guy everyone asks for help. sometimes even teachers reach you for help from time to time. a hurried schedule and the quantious mechanical work needed can be helped by already knowing how-to and planning ahead
well, it seems doing the work of an entire semester takes a little bit longer than thought. maybe you should have repaired your db manager the very first weekend.
or maybe you should have bought a usb keyboard instead of being a lazy shit for five months straight
but no need to stress, after all, that class is piss-and-shit-easy, right?
everyone passed thanks to your help!
but time's passed by and little is left
you gotta get that job done quick, mate
most of everything else is done, only thing left is that project from the third unit
that one was a real pain in the ass wasn't it? man, gotta hurry!
but it's not like there's gonna be any setbacks in the meanwhile, right?
maybe you are a little bit dumber than you thought
this ain't funny anymore
getting the final networking class's project took a lil bit longer than thought
three days left would be enough if i didn't feel like a loosey clockwork motor
if it wasn't for the provigil and that gram of meth you have from months ago you wouldn't have made it in this class; and without them you ain't gonna make it in this last one
but you had months beforehand, retard
you knew it was unavoidable
that shit was originally intended to be done by an entire team, not by you alone
and you only have around 60 hours left
but you alone is more than enough, right?
after all, you are not clinically retarded!
last time you got at least six hours of sleep, mate?
is it reasonable to think you can do a team's work of two months in three days?
did you know this was preventable? it most certainly was
it was just a matter of not doing it at the very fucking last moment!
and how is it going? how much did that lil' problem set you back? 6-7 hours?
are you tired? does your chest feel funny?
getting nervous ain't you?
big day's here, mate!
you didn't finish it, but the teacher is going to pass you anyways, right? all five units?
he knows you know your shit, you've taken three classes with him before
he's gonna value that
but nevermind, it seems that general power failure affected the school too
but that gives you one more fucking day! you ain't gonna take any chances
it's like a fucking miracle!
and cautious when driving back home, you haven't slept for who-knows how long
good thing you have that piece of paper full of meth disolving in your ass
it burns like mad, but hey, it's better than falling asleep on the road
or even worse, falling asleep before class and failing in such a retarded manner
finally home! safe and sound, without dying and the stuff
time to get serious, or else!
>>203651
shit's getting a lil' freaky isn't it mate!?
they noticed the jerky movements on your face, and your sudden weight loss and sunken eyes are terribly obvious
but it's a little price to pay so you don't have to repeat an entire class
can you imagine how discouraging that would be? to be set back an entire fucking semester just because of one class!?
you got no time to waste!
night's coming by, and keeping going is getting harder and harder by the minute
but nothing you can't handle, right!?
shove that shit down your foodhole and find that fucking straw before you die from dehydratation
and better wash it before using it if you don't wanna get a gastric infection
deadline is at 10am, still 14 hours left
better get some refreshment if you don't wanna tear your now-white hair off
after all, 14 hours is more than enough, right?
after all, that class is fuck-me-in-the-ass-easy!
much work's been done, and still 10 hours left
but it's hard to type when your eyes are sore red and your left hand feels like made of wire
and who are we kidding? this shit ain't gonna get done in 10 hours!
getting desperate? why not asking for a little help?
and who will we ask? are we gonna pay some indian dude to code some GUI on fiverr?
that ain't gonna happen
is your phone still plugged in? why not checking it out?
why not asking on your school's group? you're always willing to help, they must reciprocate, right?
but nevermind, you know that ain't gonna work, better reach for someone trustful
why not that guy with the glasses you teamed up with in networking? he seems chill
last time seen: two minutes ago
good thing you were too lazy to delete whatsapp!
just gotta text him casually, like people do!
"hey man, i need some help
i still haven't finished the db class's project, the one from the third unit
could you code some gui for me while i do everything else? i'll pay you real good for it, deadline is 10am"
"Don't worry man no need to pay me lol
Been there
Just gimme something to base my work on
Like, how you want it
Can't sleep and got nothing to do"
bless this guy's soul!
he's relieved me from a humongous load on my back
i mean, if he actually does something
at all
better give him some simple concept designs and hex color codes, just in case
eight hours left[i]
just gotta keep pushing for a little more
what's left is the easiest stuff, the stuff you've done many times before
[i]a converter class 'round here, a saving method 'round there, an updating event 'round there…
just a matter of actually doing it! 'cause you fucking stopped typing!
what are you doing there frozen like a frozen retard?
do you want to repeat the course!?
you've done this almost-exact same thing over hundreds of times, it's muscular memory by this point
you just have to focus!
see? we are doing it! see that? how we are doing it?
now, open your eyes
you were asleep all this time! your hands were static and your eyes were closed!
it was all a great dream!
but we have to keep going, we got no other choice
just move the keyboard a lil' bit to the right, it's not in the right position and you are typing gibberish
don't worry, ctrl+z, keep going for a little more
see? we are doing it! see that? how we are doing it?
now, open your eyes
you were asleep all this time! your hands were static and your eyes were closed!
it was all a great dream!
but we have to keep going, we got no other choice
you just pressed the return key a bunch of times
but now that it's in your brain's cache, it should be no big deal!
don't worry, ctrl+z, keep going for a little more
see? we are doing it! see that? how we are doing it?
now, open your eyes
you were asleep all this time! your hands were static and your eyes were closed!
it was all a great dream!
now you know what it means to be tired!
don't worry, ctrl+z, keep going for a little more
but nevermind, it's pointless to keep punishing yourself on this
i mean, we all fail sometimes, right?
it's not that bad
piss on your piss-jug and wash your hands you filthy shit, you have a water bottle laying there on the ground
go to your bed, and have some good rest
it's gonna be a very bad day
shit's getting a lil' freaky isn't it mate!?
they noticed the jerky movements on your face, and your sudden weight loss and sunken eyes are terribly obvious
but it's a little price to pay so you don't have to repeat an entire class
can you imagine how discouraging that would be? to be set back an entire fucking semester just because of one class!?
you got no time to waste!
night's coming by, and keeping going is getting harder and harder by the minute
but nothing you can't handle, right!?
shove that shit down your foodhole and find that fucking straw before you die from dehydratation
and better wash it before using it if you don't wanna get a gastric infection
deadline is at 10am, still 14 hours left
better get some refreshment if you don't wanna tear your now-white hair off
after all, 14 hours is more than enough, right?
after all, that class is fuck-me-in-the-ass-easy!
much work's been done, and still 10 hours left
but it's hard to type when your eyes are sore red and your left hand feels like made of wire
and who are we kidding? this shit ain't gonna get done in 10 hours!
getting desperate? why not asking for a little help?
and who will we ask? are we gonna pay some indian dude to code some GUI on fiverr?
that ain't gonna happen
is your phone still plugged in? why not checking it out?
why not asking on your school's group? you're always willing to help, they must reciprocate, right?
but nevermind, you know that ain't gonna work, better reach for someone trustful
why not that guy with the glasses you teamed up with in networking? he seems chill
last time seen: two minutes ago
good thing you were too lazy to delete whatsapp!
just gotta text him casually, like people do!
"hey man, i need some help
i still haven't finished the db class's project, the one from the third unit
could you code some gui for me while i do everything else? i'll pay you real good for it, deadline is 10am"
"Don't worry man no need to pay me lol
Been there
Just gimme something to base my work on
Like, how you want it
Can't sleep and got nothing to do"
bless this guy's soul!
he's relieved me from a humongous load on my back
i mean, if he actually does something
at all
better give him some simple concept designs and hex color codes, just in case
eight hours left[i]
just gotta keep pushing for a little more
what's left is the easiest stuff, the stuff you've done many times before
[i]a converter class 'round here, a saving method 'round there, an updating event 'round there…
just a matter of actually doing it! 'cause you fucking stopped typing!
what are you doing there frozen like a frozen retard?
do you want to repeat the course!?
you've done this almost-exact same thing over hundreds of times, it's muscular memory by this point
you just have to focus!
see? we are doing it! see that? how we are doing it?
now, open your eyes
you were asleep all this time! your hands were static and your eyes were closed!
it was all a great dream!
but we have to keep going, we got no other choice
just move the keyboard a lil' bit to the right, it's not in the right position and you are typing gibberish
don't worry, ctrl+z, keep going for a little more
see? we are doing it! see that? how we are doing it?
now, open your eyes
you were asleep all this time! your hands were static and your eyes were closed!
it was all a great dream!
but we have to keep going, we got no other choice
you just pressed the return key a bunch of times
but now that it's in your brain's cache, it should be no big deal!
don't worry, ctrl+z, keep going for a little more
see? we are doing it! see that? how we are doing it?
now, open your eyes
you were asleep all this time! your hands were static and your eyes were closed!
it was all a great dream!
now you know what it means to be tired!
don't worry, ctrl+z, keep going for a little more
but nevermind, it's pointless to keep punishing yourself on this
i mean, we all fail sometimes, right?
it's not that bad
piss on your piss-jug and wash your hands you filthy shit, you have a water bottle laying there on the ground
go to your bed, and have some good rest
it's gonna be a very bad day
>>203652
i can still quite recall a pretty solid picture of that night's dream's events sequence, with particular emphasis on some kind of shadow's voice which was saying an array of non-sensical vowels with a very deep and resonant voice
it was a heavy nightmare, a very notable one
at 9am my phone's alarm went off, with the very last remaining of juice my phone's battery had left
the quite but strident sound of the alarm was enough of an annoyance to make me turn around, open my eyes and dissmiss it
but it was after some seconds after closing my eyes with the intention of getting back to sleep that i realized what was going on: a little alarm that sounded from the back of my head, screaming 10AM
opened my eyes fully, and jumped from the bed
went to take a much urgent piss and got a much needed face wash
two spoons of instant coffee in warm water, a cig and a big line of meth to try to jump-start myself
unlocked my laptop, it was 9:10AM, and nothing near-to-be-done
but i finally had some sleep, i was going to make it
checked my mail and i had a mail from the teacher:
"Mr. W., just to remind you that i have to submit grades at most 11AM, so you have until 10AM of today to send me your due projects.
Everyone else who notified me was going to submit something due already did it, i'm only waiting for you."
it was sent at 8:44AM
i replied back, "sorry Mr. P, i'm still making some little tweaks here and there, gonna upload it in some minutes"
before even opening my IDE back i remembered my classmate, and to my great surprise i had a message pending: a zip file
it was sent at 5:15AM, he didn't make them all, but the ones made were pretty solid, even with icons and animations!
THANKS the infinite and blessed providence i decided not to delete whatsapp!
it seems not being an autistic asshole really does pay off, i just had to copy and paste from the text files
but after some minutes the scare of my awakening faded out and i was left with all i trully had: an exhausted body, completely depleted of all energy
to the point that even making the slightlest mind work felt like an over-human endeavor
i managed to copy and paste the code for the GUI and made sure i had a correct connection with the database server, then put it all in a zip file
opened my mailbox to redact the mail and saw the teacher replied back: "I need you to hurry up, i still have to check it and i only have until 11AM to do it all. I'm only waiting for you."
i felt the pressure of being hurried by the only thing you can't stop, and it felt like a throbbing mass in my chest when i remembered i have 100kb/s on a good day
i replied back "sorry Mr. P, you didn't have to wait. you've been doing me a lot of favours and i didn't know how to manage my time
the controls aren't linked to anything, the gui is completely non-functional, but i guess you can get a pretty good idea of how it works by checking the classes
also for some reason, when i tried to add back the entityframework thing it wouldn't work, so i had to comment it all in a hurry to just compile it
i'll embed the sql scripts too, along the zip file"[/i]
needless to say i already accepted i was going to fail by that moment
i connected my laptop to my phone's data so it wouldn't take three hours to upload, then sent it
after making sure it was sent correctly for the twentieth time, i closed my laptop, sluggishly went to the bathroom, lit a cig and sit on the toilet to take a shit
after 15 minutes or so, i decided i had to check out my grades, nothing else could be done at that point anyways
and there it was, he passed me with the minimal
then checked my mail
he replied:
"I just needed evidence of the extra exams so i could submit the grades. next time i won't wait, so don't leave it for the last moment again, i'll just oversleep."
i don't know if it's related, but since i'm doing an engineering, school's mainly a male-only environment, free of the drama and shenanigans result of female coexistence
and that's how i lost 8kg in one month and got a nice bunch of white hair
and i think my brain don't work as well anymore
but it was worth it
[/blog]
i can still quite recall a pretty solid picture of that night's dream's events sequence, with particular emphasis on some kind of shadow's voice which was saying an array of non-sensical vowels with a very deep and resonant voice
it was a heavy nightmare, a very notable one
at 9am my phone's alarm went off, with the very last remaining of juice my phone's battery had left
the quite but strident sound of the alarm was enough of an annoyance to make me turn around, open my eyes and dissmiss it
but it was after some seconds after closing my eyes with the intention of getting back to sleep that i realized what was going on: a little alarm that sounded from the back of my head, screaming 10AM
opened my eyes fully, and jumped from the bed
went to take a much urgent piss and got a much needed face wash
two spoons of instant coffee in warm water, a cig and a big line of meth to try to jump-start myself
unlocked my laptop, it was 9:10AM, and nothing near-to-be-done
but i finally had some sleep, i was going to make it
checked my mail and i had a mail from the teacher:
"Mr. W., just to remind you that i have to submit grades at most 11AM, so you have until 10AM of today to send me your due projects.
Everyone else who notified me was going to submit something due already did it, i'm only waiting for you."
it was sent at 8:44AM
i replied back, "sorry Mr. P, i'm still making some little tweaks here and there, gonna upload it in some minutes"
before even opening my IDE back i remembered my classmate, and to my great surprise i had a message pending: a zip file
it was sent at 5:15AM, he didn't make them all, but the ones made were pretty solid, even with icons and animations!
THANKS the infinite and blessed providence i decided not to delete whatsapp!
it seems not being an autistic asshole really does pay off, i just had to copy and paste from the text files
but after some minutes the scare of my awakening faded out and i was left with all i trully had: an exhausted body, completely depleted of all energy
to the point that even making the slightlest mind work felt like an over-human endeavor
i managed to copy and paste the code for the GUI and made sure i had a correct connection with the database server, then put it all in a zip file
opened my mailbox to redact the mail and saw the teacher replied back: "I need you to hurry up, i still have to check it and i only have until 11AM to do it all. I'm only waiting for you."
i felt the pressure of being hurried by the only thing you can't stop, and it felt like a throbbing mass in my chest when i remembered i have 100kb/s on a good day
i replied back "sorry Mr. P, you didn't have to wait. you've been doing me a lot of favours and i didn't know how to manage my time
the controls aren't linked to anything, the gui is completely non-functional, but i guess you can get a pretty good idea of how it works by checking the classes
also for some reason, when i tried to add back the entityframework thing it wouldn't work, so i had to comment it all in a hurry to just compile it
i'll embed the sql scripts too, along the zip file"[/i]
needless to say i already accepted i was going to fail by that moment
i connected my laptop to my phone's data so it wouldn't take three hours to upload, then sent it
after making sure it was sent correctly for the twentieth time, i closed my laptop, sluggishly went to the bathroom, lit a cig and sit on the toilet to take a shit
after 15 minutes or so, i decided i had to check out my grades, nothing else could be done at that point anyways
and there it was, he passed me with the minimal
then checked my mail
he replied:
"I just needed evidence of the extra exams so i could submit the grades. next time i won't wait, so don't leave it for the last moment again, i'll just oversleep."
i don't know if it's related, but since i'm doing an engineering, school's mainly a male-only environment, free of the drama and shenanigans result of female coexistence
and that's how i lost 8kg in one month and got a nice bunch of white hair
and i think my brain don't work as well anymore
but it was worth it
[/blog]
>>203656
college can be a difficult experience for a variety of reasons, when i moved into my apartment i checked the water pressure in the shower and the shower didn't turn off after that, but started dripping. I was too proud of my mechanical repair abilities to put in a maintenance request and kept trying to fix it with no tools.
I spent 3 months living in a humid, steamy, rotting room until i broke and sent in the request. that was one of several problems i dealt with last year.
i seem weak, and infantile and privileged but college is difficult, a little under half the students at my school drop out. willingness to go to college is a difficult question. the OP is technically wrong but your also being pedantic
college can be a difficult experience for a variety of reasons, when i moved into my apartment i checked the water pressure in the shower and the shower didn't turn off after that, but started dripping. I was too proud of my mechanical repair abilities to put in a maintenance request and kept trying to fix it with no tools.
I spent 3 months living in a humid, steamy, rotting room until i broke and sent in the request. that was one of several problems i dealt with last year.
i seem weak, and infantile and privileged but college is difficult, a little under half the students at my school drop out. willingness to go to college is a difficult question. the OP is technically wrong but your also being pedantic
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>>201146
I'm applying for applied linguistics too, English with Russian. I have a technical degree from hs (19, Europe), but getting it made me hate the subject so I treat it as a backup plan.
Years of internet addiction and consuming all my media in English made me pretty good at it and the uni isn't that renowned so it should be easy
Also I'm learning how to code on my own since there's a high demand in my country and there are more jobs then college graduates for CS
easy major (since I'm unable to NEET) + teaching myself how to code (since I'd need to retake math for uni and somehow survive 5 years of STEM) seems like a good idea
I'm applying for applied linguistics too, English with Russian. I have a technical degree from hs (19, Europe), but getting it made me hate the subject so I treat it as a backup plan.
Years of internet addiction and consuming all my media in English made me pretty good at it and the uni isn't that renowned so it should be easy
Also I'm learning how to code on my own since there's a high demand in my country and there are more jobs then college graduates for CS
easy major (since I'm unable to NEET) + teaching myself how to code (since I'd need to retake math for uni and somehow survive 5 years of STEM) seems like a good idea
>>203774
The prospect of learning programming sounds appealing to me as well, but actually learning it and practicing it isn't interesting to me; it's just the idea of having money and being able to potentially realize some of the projects I've come up with that's nice. Or I just need to be constantly pushed and put under pressure to learn things properly and not lose interest, university, basically. But hey, at least I'll have my Philosophy degree as a prize for going through all this, and the learning process is much more streamlined.
Also, why learn Russian? Wouldn't it be the opposite of an easy major?
The prospect of learning programming sounds appealing to me as well, but actually learning it and practicing it isn't interesting to me; it's just the idea of having money and being able to potentially realize some of the projects I've come up with that's nice. Or I just need to be constantly pushed and put under pressure to learn things properly and not lose interest, university, basically. But hey, at least I'll have my Philosophy degree as a prize for going through all this, and the learning process is much more streamlined.
Also, why learn Russian? Wouldn't it be the opposite of an easy major?
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>>203777
Basically I had to choose between Russian and German and I can't stand the latter.
Also I'm Polish so many words will be similar and it may be useful when looking for a job since many companies need Russian speakers and nobody knows it well enough except for old people.
For the programming part, pressure helps a lot to be consistent but I want to learn at my own pace without having to stress over passing classes and grades, get a couple of certificates and create a nice portfolio, maybe I'll sign up for a code bootcamp though, sounds like a nice middle ground
Basically I had to choose between Russian and German and I can't stand the latter.
Also I'm Polish so many words will be similar and it may be useful when looking for a job since many companies need Russian speakers and nobody knows it well enough except for old people.
For the programming part, pressure helps a lot to be consistent but I want to learn at my own pace without having to stress over passing classes and grades, get a couple of certificates and create a nice portfolio, maybe I'll sign up for a code bootcamp though, sounds like a nice middle ground
I'm finishing up my Associates in Science degree, and maybe this is an unpopular opinion but I'm happy and excited for the first time in years.
I'll finally have a degree under my belt to help me get a better job. My ultimate goal is to work for a national forest so I can roam around in the woods and help others all day.
I'll finally have a degree under my belt to help me get a better job. My ultimate goal is to work for a national forest so I can roam around in the woods and help others all day.
I received my last grade and I didn't feel anything. There's no escape, after 20 something years of academics it's 40 years of slavery.
>>203804
how does studying science help you get a job roaming around a forest? I worry that you are being tricked.
I did a bachelor in physics and it never helped me with anything so far
how does studying science help you get a job roaming around a forest? I worry that you are being tricked.
I did a bachelor in physics and it never helped me with anything so far
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I want to research and explore small islands. I currently only have a GED (which I passed with honors). In the past, I have found school to be quite stressful, particularly the social aspects, the homework, and the restrictions on freedom.
That being said, I’m playing with the idea of going back to school in order to study small islands. I figure starting with a course in geography is the way to go, but I’m open to other suggestions. Most community colleges don’t offer courses in geography, so I’d likely have to start at a community college and transfer to a four year school.
Then again, this all seems very stressful. My interest in small islands is mild, but perhaps it’s worth a shot. The alternative is suicide.
Thoughts? Advice?
That being said, I’m playing with the idea of going back to school in order to study small islands. I figure starting with a course in geography is the way to go, but I’m open to other suggestions. Most community colleges don’t offer courses in geography, so I’d likely have to start at a community college and transfer to a four year school.
Then again, this all seems very stressful. My interest in small islands is mild, but perhaps it’s worth a shot. The alternative is suicide.
Thoughts? Advice?
>>204836
Unfortunately you have an interest in something that isn't really an actual field of study as such. There are no smallislandologists, and really there are barely even "geographers" in modern times either.
You're going to need to pick a specific region you're interested in before you get far. Academic research is characterized by autistic focus on one microsubject. Hopefully your idea wasn't to bounce around between dozens of different islands around the world, because research isn't going to let you do this; you will almost certainly spend 10+ years focused on one island or at best a small archipelago.
I would suggest your best shots for programs are either biology, probably marine (isolated islands usually have interesting and unique stuff living on or around them) or geology, if you prefer rocks to fish.
Unfortunately you have an interest in something that isn't really an actual field of study as such. There are no smallislandologists, and really there are barely even "geographers" in modern times either.
You're going to need to pick a specific region you're interested in before you get far. Academic research is characterized by autistic focus on one microsubject. Hopefully your idea wasn't to bounce around between dozens of different islands around the world, because research isn't going to let you do this; you will almost certainly spend 10+ years focused on one island or at best a small archipelago.
I would suggest your best shots for programs are either biology, probably marine (isolated islands usually have interesting and unique stuff living on or around them) or geology, if you prefer rocks to fish.
>>204828
Maybe he studied biology or forestry or something?
I have two meme degrees. It got me nowhere, either. I should have either gotten a trade, did a "not shit" degree, or gone straight to retail work.
Maybe he studied biology or forestry or something?
I have two meme degrees. It got me nowhere, either. I should have either gotten a trade, did a "not shit" degree, or gone straight to retail work.
I have a computer science degree. I am unemployed paying rent to live on a couch
Im so miserable. I wish i followed a passion in college rather than study something i was vaguely interested in and immediately grew to hate.
But i never had any passions to begin with
I had a full ride to college and its still not worth it
COLLEGE ISNT WORTH IT EVEN WHEN FREE.
Why the fuck couldnt i be born with some talent or passion for anything at all? Whats the point of living a life with no passion
Im so miserable. I wish i followed a passion in college rather than study something i was vaguely interested in and immediately grew to hate.
But i never had any passions to begin with
I had a full ride to college and its still not worth it
COLLEGE ISNT WORTH IT EVEN WHEN FREE.
Why the fuck couldnt i be born with some talent or passion for anything at all? Whats the point of living a life with no passion
>>205164
I feel you. I've always struggled with the same set of problems and still do. Funny thing is, for me this lack of interest in things isn't something that came with depression, but rather something that has always been with me. Pretty much all academic achievements and the fact that I possess at least some sort of education and skill is all thanks to my parents' tough love and university's somewhat predatory nature of "study or get kicked out and get forced to get a job and waste the time and money you've already put into your education."
I feel you. I've always struggled with the same set of problems and still do. Funny thing is, for me this lack of interest in things isn't something that came with depression, but rather something that has always been with me. Pretty much all academic achievements and the fact that I possess at least some sort of education and skill is all thanks to my parents' tough love and university's somewhat predatory nature of "study or get kicked out and get forced to get a job and waste the time and money you've already put into your education."
>>205222
Not the the wiz you're responding to, but I got work with a CS degree through an internship. You'll be amazed at how the simple computer skills you take for granted make you look like a tech genius in the eyes of a boomer. I guarantee that 90% of wizards would outperform an average boomer at a technical job they've done for a decade within 6 months if not sooner. These boomers are so puffed up on their own competence but they have no fucking idea really.
Not the the wiz you're responding to, but I got work with a CS degree through an internship. You'll be amazed at how the simple computer skills you take for granted make you look like a tech genius in the eyes of a boomer. I guarantee that 90% of wizards would outperform an average boomer at a technical job they've done for a decade within 6 months if not sooner. These boomers are so puffed up on their own competence but they have no fucking idea really.
>>205229
How do i get ajob like this?
>>205222
Im ass at programming. This is not imposter syndrome. I was bad and now im rusty.
Icant apply to any jobs because when i graduated i knew no languages usable in industry. Not only thag but i hate the industry. Im basically a luddite were it not for my ability to use a computer.
All i feel like i know at this point is LaTeX.
How do i get ajob like this?
>>205222
Im ass at programming. This is not imposter syndrome. I was bad and now im rusty.
Icant apply to any jobs because when i graduated i knew no languages usable in industry. Not only thag but i hate the industry. Im basically a luddite were it not for my ability to use a computer.
All i feel like i know at this point is LaTeX.
>>205221
Im with you. The only reason I have academic achievements was due to societal push and my own complete lacl of creativity. I never felt anything from it. And now its the end of the road. When i read posts about going to college here and elsewhere im filled with dread. They shouldnt do it.
Whats the point in being born if you're just going to be a loser?
Im with you. The only reason I have academic achievements was due to societal push and my own complete lacl of creativity. I never felt anything from it. And now its the end of the road. When i read posts about going to college here and elsewhere im filled with dread. They shouldnt do it.
Whats the point in being born if you're just going to be a loser?
>>205485
I dont believe computer science improves the world. Also i dont know how to program
I dont believe computer science improves the world. Also i dont know how to program
I go to community college occasionally, right now I'm dropped out, I don't think it's like high school at all, it's actually worse. In high school you can just zone out and maybe play games on a handheld or on the pcs and just scrape by with C grades on everything, in college its actually stressful because you can easily fail subjects if you don't care at all AND also on top of that it's not like high school where a teacher might give you a bit of a grade boost for not being troublesome, it's actually all just your pure work which could easily just be shit.
Also being in college is like edging so close to career and goal oriented stuff, it's not like high school where I was just waiting to get home and play pc games, all the talk in college is about how I'm gonna get a job, it's really depressing because due to mental issues I'm unhirable unless I had crazy good grades which I don't.
Also being in college is like edging so close to career and goal oriented stuff, it's not like high school where I was just waiting to get home and play pc games, all the talk in college is about how I'm gonna get a job, it's really depressing because due to mental issues I'm unhirable unless I had crazy good grades which I don't.
Guess who has an assignment due tomorrow? Guess who is going to spend all his time browsing chans and masturbating? I swear if only I was given time and not pressed for deadlines I could train myself to be functional. I even got myself to watch a few hours of lectures and tutorials on youtube yesterday. Just don't expect me to be a normal right away. My mom is even telling me to find a job or some kind of activity because that's what all the other kids do as if my shitty community college tier uni isn't stressing enough for me.
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>>199180
beautiful pic OP
beautiful pic OP
One more year for me. My dad wants me to go to graduate school because my degree is worthless without it, but I never had interactions with any of my professors so I don't have anyone to get recommendation letters from. There's no way I can get into any program without making friends with professors, right? I'm fucked. Even if I have perfect grades, everything in life will always depend on social skills that I don't have.
>>205594
What field are your pursuing? For STEM type stuff it's definitely difficult without having someone in academia vouch for you.
What I'm trying is just emailing some grad students and seeing if they'll let me work on some small project or do their gruntwork. It may not get you into a top uni but a recommendation from them is at least better than nothing, and it sure beats trying to suck up to a professor in their crowded office hours.
What field are your pursuing? For STEM type stuff it's definitely difficult without having someone in academia vouch for you.
What I'm trying is just emailing some grad students and seeing if they'll let me work on some small project or do their gruntwork. It may not get you into a top uni but a recommendation from them is at least better than nothing, and it sure beats trying to suck up to a professor in their crowded office hours.
>>205595
It's in a subdivision of biology.
I've gotten all A's without ever feeling the need to ask for help. Why on earth, then, would I take time out of my already loaded day to go to office hours just to suck the professor's dick? Even in the most advanced, autistic sciences, the real winners will always be normie slackers who study in groups and fool around on snapchat and have to ask the professor for help on all their homework questions. Even if my personality completely changed and I no longer had anything impeding me, there is no way anyone could make friends with three good recommenders in 1 year. And I've never even made a single friend.
For any apprentice or wizard out there considering college, probably the most important factor other than cost is size of the school. I would be in a fine position if I went to a small local college where I could stand out and then applied to a mediocre graduate program. But because I fell for this meme, I'm fucked and my degree will be useless. A large university with lots of "opportunities" to take advantage of (which you'll never get due to competition anyway) is not a place for people like us.
It's in a subdivision of biology.
I've gotten all A's without ever feeling the need to ask for help. Why on earth, then, would I take time out of my already loaded day to go to office hours just to suck the professor's dick? Even in the most advanced, autistic sciences, the real winners will always be normie slackers who study in groups and fool around on snapchat and have to ask the professor for help on all their homework questions. Even if my personality completely changed and I no longer had anything impeding me, there is no way anyone could make friends with three good recommenders in 1 year. And I've never even made a single friend.
For any apprentice or wizard out there considering college, probably the most important factor other than cost is size of the school. I would be in a fine position if I went to a small local college where I could stand out and then applied to a mediocre graduate program. But because I fell for this meme, I'm fucked and my degree will be useless. A large university with lots of "opportunities" to take advantage of (which you'll never get due to competition anyway) is not a place for people like us.
This seems like a wizkid 2k19 thread, but I'll take a bite.
Hated highschool more than anything. Worse period of my life. Frequent migraines and illnesses due to stress, mother suddenly comes into my life because she actually "wants to be a parent now" (Meaning, she is done riding the cock carousel since no normgroid man with dignity wants and older lady in her 30s with a history and wants to settle down now teehee~)failing grades due to being sick, and counselors/CPS being up my butthole.
Mother was the worse part of it. She caused most of the problems. Instead of homeschooling me like any normal parent who has a sickly child who is not doing well, she let me stay in school till senior year because she so desperately wanted me to have the "highschool experience" she didnt have. Yes, typical normalfag she is, skipping classes and having sex with a bunch of men, ending up getting pregnant not once, but 2+ times, (My older brother was a miscarriage, mother was [is] promiscuous so there is probably an abortion or more miscarriages somewhere in there) and ended up dropping out. Didn't have any highschool experience since I didn't talk to anyone really in highschool, was by my self most of the time, and never went to prom graduation or ring dance since I did online schooling in senior. All putting me in school did was make me more anxious and sick and ended up making me hate my family even more.
The other worse part of it that sticks in my head was the counselors and CPS. Counselor was an annoying scubbus who believed my damn mother (a compulsive liar) over my intel, and always chastised me. (Gotta stick up for all the single mommies out there!! It's so hard sleeping around and ruining your childrens lives!!!) I was always lazy and didn't listen to the mother who abandoned me to my grandmother up until they threatened her on her taxes for not caring for me. (Never really interacted with my mother that much until the end of middle school)
CPS came because, as I said, missed school a ton due to illness. It was some dumb Jamaican scubbus, who if I ever see again plan on telling her off. First she lied to me, and told me she would not tell my mother anything that I told her. Then she threatened me and told me she would take me away from my grandmother, the succubus I had lived with all of my life, because my mother is my guardian. I didn't care really what they did at the time anyways, since I'd be an adult soon anyways. Dumb retards.
And with that, highschool was terrible because of the trusted adults in my life. This is why there is such a stigma about single mothers, and child protective angencies, because they only cause more pain and dysfunction in the world.
As a matter a fact, while I am a non violent person who would never kill anyone due to strong morals, I do admit that whenever I see that someone killed their spouse or their parents, I feel a small amount of pity. They got drove so much up a latter that they would go so far to kill someone. You really have to hurt someone in order for them to go that far.
Hated highschool more than anything. Worse period of my life. Frequent migraines and illnesses due to stress, mother suddenly comes into my life because she actually "wants to be a parent now" (Meaning, she is done riding the cock carousel since no normgroid man with dignity wants and older lady in her 30s with a history and wants to settle down now teehee~)failing grades due to being sick, and counselors/CPS being up my butthole.
Mother was the worse part of it. She caused most of the problems. Instead of homeschooling me like any normal parent who has a sickly child who is not doing well, she let me stay in school till senior year because she so desperately wanted me to have the "highschool experience" she didnt have. Yes, typical normalfag she is, skipping classes and having sex with a bunch of men, ending up getting pregnant not once, but 2+ times, (My older brother was a miscarriage, mother was [is] promiscuous so there is probably an abortion or more miscarriages somewhere in there) and ended up dropping out. Didn't have any highschool experience since I didn't talk to anyone really in highschool, was by my self most of the time, and never went to prom graduation or ring dance since I did online schooling in senior. All putting me in school did was make me more anxious and sick and ended up making me hate my family even more.
The other worse part of it that sticks in my head was the counselors and CPS. Counselor was an annoying scubbus who believed my damn mother (a compulsive liar) over my intel, and always chastised me. (Gotta stick up for all the single mommies out there!! It's so hard sleeping around and ruining your childrens lives!!!) I was always lazy and didn't listen to the mother who abandoned me to my grandmother up until they threatened her on her taxes for not caring for me. (Never really interacted with my mother that much until the end of middle school)
CPS came because, as I said, missed school a ton due to illness. It was some dumb Jamaican scubbus, who if I ever see again plan on telling her off. First she lied to me, and told me she would not tell my mother anything that I told her. Then she threatened me and told me she would take me away from my grandmother, the succubus I had lived with all of my life, because my mother is my guardian. I didn't care really what they did at the time anyways, since I'd be an adult soon anyways. Dumb retards.
And with that, highschool was terrible because of the trusted adults in my life. This is why there is such a stigma about single mothers, and child protective angencies, because they only cause more pain and dysfunction in the world.
As a matter a fact, while I am a non violent person who would never kill anyone due to strong morals, I do admit that whenever I see that someone killed their spouse or their parents, I feel a small amount of pity. They got drove so much up a latter that they would go so far to kill someone. You really have to hurt someone in order for them to go that far.
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>>205164
I've become more and more cynical about CS as the years have gone on. When I first went into it in uni I thought it'd be a really cool profession and I'd be some lone wolf programmer doing cool shit for money. 3 years of classes and 1 internship later and I'm disillusioned with programming and the industry in general.
I don't give a shit about 95% of the companies offering jobs or their mission, so the job itself will have no real non-monetary value to me and thus feel meaningless unless I religiously worship consumerism.
Actual programming is bogged down by having to write tests and get multiple code reviews from approved people. Often as a new person I got dragged back and forth by people who would give me conflicting advice, so I'd have to rewrite things multiple times.
Large amounts of legacy code that no one really bothers changing because it works and everyone's more focused on adding new stuff.
Also it seems like the expectation for everyone is that you need to be spending large amounts of your free time programming. Like you need to be some superautist who spends all his time programming for some personal projects or contributing to github projects for free, in addition to all the studying and programming you have to do for school. You can still get an internship if you don't have these but you're then at a major disadvantage, especially if you're a wizard and lack social skills. Honestly I feel like I got lucky with my internship because they were hiring like 20 people for software engineering interns and so probably weren't as picky. But even then my grades probably carried me.
Freelancing I don't know about but it seems oversaturated. On Youtube now there are shitloads of people making videos about "domestic nomads" so of course lots of people will be rushing to that. Consultancy is an option but I hear you need a decade of experience to be taken seriously, and it still wouldn't feel meaningful when I don't give a shit about these companies or what they're doing. Making your own thing and profiting is mostly dependent on luck, like these shitty viral phone apps or games. Probably the best bet to make money would be to just shit out free phone apps loaded with ads but even that would probably be a trivial amount.
Programming on my own, just as a hobby, could be fun but because the projects or topics I'm interested aren't relevant to the current job market I'm just gnawed at by guilt for wasting time whenever I work on them. All the dreams I had of doing cool shit with computers are dead and my options are either to become a corporate cuck, get lucky and strike it big with some idea, or churn out shitty apps and websites to make money in scammy ways.
I regret all the time and money I've poured into this dumb fucking degree. If I had worked towards getting one of these mindless night guard jobs after high school where you can be on a computer or reading when not patrolling, I would've been in a better place with more money and probably would've learned more there, by programming and reading in my free time, than all my years of university.
I've become more and more cynical about CS as the years have gone on. When I first went into it in uni I thought it'd be a really cool profession and I'd be some lone wolf programmer doing cool shit for money. 3 years of classes and 1 internship later and I'm disillusioned with programming and the industry in general.
I don't give a shit about 95% of the companies offering jobs or their mission, so the job itself will have no real non-monetary value to me and thus feel meaningless unless I religiously worship consumerism.
Actual programming is bogged down by having to write tests and get multiple code reviews from approved people. Often as a new person I got dragged back and forth by people who would give me conflicting advice, so I'd have to rewrite things multiple times.
Large amounts of legacy code that no one really bothers changing because it works and everyone's more focused on adding new stuff.
Also it seems like the expectation for everyone is that you need to be spending large amounts of your free time programming. Like you need to be some superautist who spends all his time programming for some personal projects or contributing to github projects for free, in addition to all the studying and programming you have to do for school. You can still get an internship if you don't have these but you're then at a major disadvantage, especially if you're a wizard and lack social skills. Honestly I feel like I got lucky with my internship because they were hiring like 20 people for software engineering interns and so probably weren't as picky. But even then my grades probably carried me.
Freelancing I don't know about but it seems oversaturated. On Youtube now there are shitloads of people making videos about "domestic nomads" so of course lots of people will be rushing to that. Consultancy is an option but I hear you need a decade of experience to be taken seriously, and it still wouldn't feel meaningful when I don't give a shit about these companies or what they're doing. Making your own thing and profiting is mostly dependent on luck, like these shitty viral phone apps or games. Probably the best bet to make money would be to just shit out free phone apps loaded with ads but even that would probably be a trivial amount.
Programming on my own, just as a hobby, could be fun but because the projects or topics I'm interested aren't relevant to the current job market I'm just gnawed at by guilt for wasting time whenever I work on them. All the dreams I had of doing cool shit with computers are dead and my options are either to become a corporate cuck, get lucky and strike it big with some idea, or churn out shitty apps and websites to make money in scammy ways.
I regret all the time and money I've poured into this dumb fucking degree. If I had worked towards getting one of these mindless night guard jobs after high school where you can be on a computer or reading when not patrolling, I would've been in a better place with more money and probably would've learned more there, by programming and reading in my free time, than all my years of university.
>>205817
Hmm same. Don't care about most companies' missions. Lots of annoying baggage to deal with at work.
Hmm same. Don't care about most companies' missions. Lots of annoying baggage to deal with at work.
>>205602
Maybe you could try some smaller companies? Some of the things you are complaining about might be better there.
Sure at a big company no one is going to refactor huge legacy code that works even though it's written like it was from 1990s. But in a small company you might have more freedom. At least that's what I've heard.
As for code reviews, I think the same thing applies like above. The smaller the company, the less serious they're gonna be about code reviews, refactoring, teamwork, agile development (you've probably heard that buzzword), test driven development, CICD and whatever other bullshit the industry likes now.
The only downside, I'd imagine, is money. But it should still be a relatively good pay. And also chances are you will find more wizardly environment than in some huge corporate machine where you either have to be a normie or be DAMN GOOD at pretending you're one to survive there.
Maybe you could try some smaller companies? Some of the things you are complaining about might be better there.
Sure at a big company no one is going to refactor huge legacy code that works even though it's written like it was from 1990s. But in a small company you might have more freedom. At least that's what I've heard.
As for code reviews, I think the same thing applies like above. The smaller the company, the less serious they're gonna be about code reviews, refactoring, teamwork, agile development (you've probably heard that buzzword), test driven development, CICD and whatever other bullshit the industry likes now.
The only downside, I'd imagine, is money. But it should still be a relatively good pay. And also chances are you will find more wizardly environment than in some huge corporate machine where you either have to be a normie or be DAMN GOOD at pretending you're one to survive there.
>>205817
Hey man Im that original poster and I agree with you 100%. I feel like studying CS ruined tech for me. I looked behind the curtain and I was just disgusted. I could no longer be excited for any of the things my peers were. I had a friend genuinely considering moving across the country and sleeping in the office for his internship. We arent treated as human and we love it. I then got into old uncle Ted my last years of college and it made me feel less alone
I've already graduated. Let me tell you it doesn't get better. I cant bear to program and my skills have deteriorated. I cant even get a retail job with my degree.
College is hopeless.
Hey man Im that original poster and I agree with you 100%. I feel like studying CS ruined tech for me. I looked behind the curtain and I was just disgusted. I could no longer be excited for any of the things my peers were. I had a friend genuinely considering moving across the country and sleeping in the office for his internship. We arent treated as human and we love it. I then got into old uncle Ted my last years of college and it made me feel less alone
I've already graduated. Let me tell you it doesn't get better. I cant bear to program and my skills have deteriorated. I cant even get a retail job with my degree.
College is hopeless.
>>201146
I wanted to study languages as well but wasting my time on menial shit like history or PE is pissing me off. But that's not really a problem since i'm too poor to apply anyway. And i'd probably fail entrance exams as well.
I've started learning another language by myself. Wouldn't be the first time but this time i chose a more tactical approach with all the books and apps as opposed to just sitting with a translator and trying to remember shit. Doesn't go too well. I need time and quiet to concentrate but in my flat i get neither.
I wanted to study languages as well but wasting my time on menial shit like history or PE is pissing me off. But that's not really a problem since i'm too poor to apply anyway. And i'd probably fail entrance exams as well.
I've started learning another language by myself. Wouldn't be the first time but this time i chose a more tactical approach with all the books and apps as opposed to just sitting with a translator and trying to remember shit. Doesn't go too well. I need time and quiet to concentrate but in my flat i get neither.
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For other people who are/were in computer science or really any STEM degree, I'm curious whether you were good at or interested in math before college or not.
The reason I ask is because I'm thinking back to my school years before uni and am starting to realize math was always my weakest subject. On every standardized test I took my reading and writing scores were always at or near the top percentile but math was always lower. All my math classes I usually got like a B or so when everything else was an A, and whenever group work was forced I was usually slower than other people. I remember in high school hearing some redneck kid announcing her SAT scores to her friends and was surprised when she scored like 30 points higher than me in math.
English, however, I always did really well in. There was this one test in my freshman English class on a Shakespeare play that just about everyone bombed. Well I was addicted to a particular video game that year, to the point where I didn't study or do homework at all at home, but I got a perfect or near perfect score, and when other kids started handing around some petition for the teacher to curve the scores I was confused as fuck. I always did really well in foreign language and history classes too.
Senior year I decided I was going to go to uni for CS, partly because I spent almost all my time on the computer and so figured I'd be good at it, and partly because the pay for related jobs was so high. Plus I had some delusions about developing video games in the future, which to my naive young mind seemed cool as fuck. During that time I kind of rebuilt my identity around being good at math, even though past results proved this wasn't true, and adopted what I guess is a very typical STEMfag outlook, where I hated subjects like English because there's "no real right answer" and "it's not rigorous enough". I also stopped reading completely and instead spent time studying CS and programming in preparation for college.
In uni I kept up this mindset mostly but I did read a few classic books when I had time and ironically my favorite classes during my first year were philosophy and psychology rather than math or computer science (I took an American literature class as well but my professor for that was pretty bad). Computer science classes I always did pretty well in but I think a lot of that can be attributed to all the preparation I did in high school. Math classes however have always been shit for me. Every math class I take, there's at least one exam that I end up kind of blanking out and doing shitty on. I spend way too much time thinking on one problem because I just get stumped, and I end up panicking which just makes things worse. I've always managed to pull through because every math professor I've had has been lenient and offered either extra credit or replacement of the lowest midterm score with the final exam score, if it's higher. If I didn't have these I would've done pretty badly.
I don't know, I realize a liberal arts degree would've been a massive waste of time and money because the prospective salary for anything you could get with one (assuming you even get something at all) is too low in pay to justify the bill. But on the other hand I feel like it sucks that I was basically forced to take my weakest subject and attempt to turn it into my strongest, giving up everything else, just for job prospects.
The conclusion I've come to from this line of thought is the same as just about every other I've had relating to college since experiencing my first programming job - I wish I didn't fucking go to uni. But I think it's too late now.
The reason I ask is because I'm thinking back to my school years before uni and am starting to realize math was always my weakest subject. On every standardized test I took my reading and writing scores were always at or near the top percentile but math was always lower. All my math classes I usually got like a B or so when everything else was an A, and whenever group work was forced I was usually slower than other people. I remember in high school hearing some redneck kid announcing her SAT scores to her friends and was surprised when she scored like 30 points higher than me in math.
English, however, I always did really well in. There was this one test in my freshman English class on a Shakespeare play that just about everyone bombed. Well I was addicted to a particular video game that year, to the point where I didn't study or do homework at all at home, but I got a perfect or near perfect score, and when other kids started handing around some petition for the teacher to curve the scores I was confused as fuck. I always did really well in foreign language and history classes too.
Senior year I decided I was going to go to uni for CS, partly because I spent almost all my time on the computer and so figured I'd be good at it, and partly because the pay for related jobs was so high. Plus I had some delusions about developing video games in the future, which to my naive young mind seemed cool as fuck. During that time I kind of rebuilt my identity around being good at math, even though past results proved this wasn't true, and adopted what I guess is a very typical STEMfag outlook, where I hated subjects like English because there's "no real right answer" and "it's not rigorous enough". I also stopped reading completely and instead spent time studying CS and programming in preparation for college.
In uni I kept up this mindset mostly but I did read a few classic books when I had time and ironically my favorite classes during my first year were philosophy and psychology rather than math or computer science (I took an American literature class as well but my professor for that was pretty bad). Computer science classes I always did pretty well in but I think a lot of that can be attributed to all the preparation I did in high school. Math classes however have always been shit for me. Every math class I take, there's at least one exam that I end up kind of blanking out and doing shitty on. I spend way too much time thinking on one problem because I just get stumped, and I end up panicking which just makes things worse. I've always managed to pull through because every math professor I've had has been lenient and offered either extra credit or replacement of the lowest midterm score with the final exam score, if it's higher. If I didn't have these I would've done pretty badly.
I don't know, I realize a liberal arts degree would've been a massive waste of time and money because the prospective salary for anything you could get with one (assuming you even get something at all) is too low in pay to justify the bill. But on the other hand I feel like it sucks that I was basically forced to take my weakest subject and attempt to turn it into my strongest, giving up everything else, just for job prospects.
The conclusion I've come to from this line of thought is the same as just about every other I've had relating to college since experiencing my first programming job - I wish I didn't fucking go to uni. But I think it's too late now.
>>206122
Math was always my worst. I sucked at hs math. In college i realized i enjoyed and was good at more abstract math and i loved proofs. I cant do any number crunching at all. No calc.
I regret studying computer science so much
Math was always my worst. I sucked at hs math. In college i realized i enjoyed and was good at more abstract math and i loved proofs. I cant do any number crunching at all. No calc.
I regret studying computer science so much
>>206122
> I'm curious whether you were good at or interested in math before college or not.
Don't know why you're asking this but yeah I like maths and I am relatively better at it than other classmates. I am not some honor student who studies regularly but I've had enjoyment doing maths in high school. Of course simply "liking" isn't enough since college is filled with competitive chads who study for success. Just because you understand derivatives in school and the jock didn't doesn't mean shit. Even those geniuses who studied for fun can thrive because he has an inordinate interest and energy that let him study as much as we play video games. Yeah, I "liked" maths the same way people who watch world war 2 documentaries like history. Maybe if I have the energy I may even start to study maths outside of school but I will never get close to those people who doesn't even like maths but have the discipline to study them everyday. Sorry if I didn't answer your question. Are you still in uni? If you have graduated then it doesn't matter since you're free to do whatever you want now. Plenty of people get jobs unrelated to their degree. I am still in uni but I dropped out of the more competitive college I described before and move to my country's equivalent of community college. It's really lenient and I've enjoyed learning much more since I have more freedom to approach things how I like it.
> I'm curious whether you were good at or interested in math before college or not.
Don't know why you're asking this but yeah I like maths and I am relatively better at it than other classmates. I am not some honor student who studies regularly but I've had enjoyment doing maths in high school. Of course simply "liking" isn't enough since college is filled with competitive chads who study for success. Just because you understand derivatives in school and the jock didn't doesn't mean shit. Even those geniuses who studied for fun can thrive because he has an inordinate interest and energy that let him study as much as we play video games. Yeah, I "liked" maths the same way people who watch world war 2 documentaries like history. Maybe if I have the energy I may even start to study maths outside of school but I will never get close to those people who doesn't even like maths but have the discipline to study them everyday. Sorry if I didn't answer your question. Are you still in uni? If you have graduated then it doesn't matter since you're free to do whatever you want now. Plenty of people get jobs unrelated to their degree. I am still in uni but I dropped out of the more competitive college I described before and move to my country's equivalent of community college. It's really lenient and I've enjoyed learning much more since I have more freedom to approach things how I like it.
>>206122
>>206123
I was bad at high school maths but also was ok at university maths. I attribute it entirely to being able to work alone in my room. I can't function in a classroom learning environment, by the time I get home I was always too exhausted to do homework. At university I just didnt go to class and taught myself fine. Went on to do well in a graduate degree but still have never been employed
>>206123
I was bad at high school maths but also was ok at university maths. I attribute it entirely to being able to work alone in my room. I can't function in a classroom learning environment, by the time I get home I was always too exhausted to do homework. At university I just didnt go to class and taught myself fine. Went on to do well in a graduate degree but still have never been employed
>>206122
I studied CS. I was bad at math and specially bad in language classes. I never had a strong subject.
My parents forced me to go to university, otherwise I would have been kicket out.
I don't dislike programming but I am bad at it. Working as a programmer is stressful, any code you (or your current/past coworkers) write will be there the next day, week, month or year to bite your ass, the deadlines are tight and no one seems to understand it.
Can't even justify it with a higher salary than average since IT salaries in my country are on the low side.
I wish I had been able to work restocking a supermarket at night or something similar, but it was impossible to find something like that in a country with high unemployment. They demanded years of experience too.
I studied CS. I was bad at math and specially bad in language classes. I never had a strong subject.
My parents forced me to go to university, otherwise I would have been kicket out.
I don't dislike programming but I am bad at it. Working as a programmer is stressful, any code you (or your current/past coworkers) write will be there the next day, week, month or year to bite your ass, the deadlines are tight and no one seems to understand it.
Can't even justify it with a higher salary than average since IT salaries in my country are on the low side.
I wish I had been able to work restocking a supermarket at night or something similar, but it was impossible to find something like that in a country with high unemployment. They demanded years of experience too.
>>206122
>For other people who are/were in computer science or really any STEM degree, I'm curious whether you were good at or interested in math before college or not.
Yes. Math was the only subject that required 0 social skills. I somehow managed to never have a 'group assignment' in math. The grading was always incredibly fair in the sense that I could always understand why I was graded a certain way, and if not, I could argue my case. In English, it always felt completely subjective ("I took off points because it didn't feel like those paragraphs 'flowed.'"); but in math, I could always give a completely autistic, logical case, and the teacher would have to budge.
>For other people who are/were in computer science or really any STEM degree, I'm curious whether you were good at or interested in math before college or not.
Yes. Math was the only subject that required 0 social skills. I somehow managed to never have a 'group assignment' in math. The grading was always incredibly fair in the sense that I could always understand why I was graded a certain way, and if not, I could argue my case. In English, it always felt completely subjective ("I took off points because it didn't feel like those paragraphs 'flowed.'"); but in math, I could always give a completely autistic, logical case, and the teacher would have to budge.
>>206123
>In college i realized i enjoyed and was good at more abstract math and i loved proofs.
That's interesting because I've had a similar experience. I'm not amazing at proofs but I'm decent enough and I enjoy them much more than the number crunching and traditional algebraic problems I had before.
Linear algebra was the first class we had to actually write them for homework/exams and I was surprised when I found that the proof problems were pretty much what carried me through exams - I would fuck up calculation ones somewhere in the long line of matrix operations but on the proofs portion I was always able to get perfect or near perfect score.
CS theory and algorithms were also my favorite computer science classes because a significant part of them involved proofs - proving something is a regular language, proving an algorithm is optimal and correct, etc.
>In college i realized i enjoyed and was good at more abstract math and i loved proofs.
That's interesting because I've had a similar experience. I'm not amazing at proofs but I'm decent enough and I enjoy them much more than the number crunching and traditional algebraic problems I had before.
Linear algebra was the first class we had to actually write them for homework/exams and I was surprised when I found that the proof problems were pretty much what carried me through exams - I would fuck up calculation ones somewhere in the long line of matrix operations but on the proofs portion I was always able to get perfect or near perfect score.
CS theory and algorithms were also my favorite computer science classes because a significant part of them involved proofs - proving something is a regular language, proving an algorithm is optimal and correct, etc.
I've been thinking about going back and studying maths. I tried to do it years ago after I finally finished my useless undergraduate degree, but my parents made me get a job and the stress of writing job applications disrupted my studying so much that I had to drop out. After that I just couldn't get back into it.
But I'm not sure how it would go now I'm already over 30 and it's weird to think about spending most of this decade in education. Also, I don't think I could cope with on-campus study again. I was desperately unhappy the first time around and doing that again is too awful to imagine.
But I'm not sure how it would go now I'm already over 30 and it's weird to think about spending most of this decade in education. Also, I don't think I could cope with on-campus study again. I was desperately unhappy the first time around and doing that again is too awful to imagine.
Can't wait to go back to academia, I almost miss all the vitriol and acrimony, conceited attitudes and mindless theorizing.
I have been given another ultimatum. Another one since I was forced to go back to school, but it's not much since I might be able to finish within the next summer. If I cannot pass ALL of my classes, I will have to pay rent. Rent.
I've been sad, guys. I truly miss those day where I was going to college, passing my easy classes, and my parents were somewhat proud of me. Now, it's been 5+ years, and I have no degree at all, and no, I'm not talking about a bachelor's.
Despite everything positive, I cannot live in a world where I can't make at least decent money. Right now, I can't afford anything with the job I have, and I don't want to go up the ladder. It seems like a failure to me, to choose a minimum wage job and work myself up. My goal was to pass this quickly enough (failed hard) and get some kind of career.
If I can't pass these classes this semester, I will seriously look into suicide. My mind if a prison at this point and I'm stagnating. Even if I were to be able to succeed in my goal, I would still be trapped in my own mind. I can't remember a single happy year in my life. That is, I can't remember a single happy year in the years I remember.
I've been sad, guys. I truly miss those day where I was going to college, passing my easy classes, and my parents were somewhat proud of me. Now, it's been 5+ years, and I have no degree at all, and no, I'm not talking about a bachelor's.
Despite everything positive, I cannot live in a world where I can't make at least decent money. Right now, I can't afford anything with the job I have, and I don't want to go up the ladder. It seems like a failure to me, to choose a minimum wage job and work myself up. My goal was to pass this quickly enough (failed hard) and get some kind of career.
If I can't pass these classes this semester, I will seriously look into suicide. My mind if a prison at this point and I'm stagnating. Even if I were to be able to succeed in my goal, I would still be trapped in my own mind. I can't remember a single happy year in my life. That is, I can't remember a single happy year in the years I remember.
>>206308
>I have no degree at all, and no, I'm not talking about a bachelor's
Do you mean you spent all that time without getting a bachelors, or that you don't "even" have a bachelors. As in, you spent that time getting an associates or something.
For all the people talking about going into CS, I have a short story related to that. To graduate high school I had to do a "Senior project". Apparently it is a state requirement. The main point of it, as far as I can tell, was the presentation of it you had to do your senior year. Ready people for the professional world or something.
Anyway, the project could be anything, so most people did some random BS. I decided, since I had an "interest in computers/electronics" (Read: played lots of games and dicked around on the internet) that I would make a phone app. Just a simple informational thing for my school, I was literally going to rip everything from the school website. My dad even got me some 3rd party software that made it even easier to do. I thought it would be easy.
It was fucking hell. I had hoped to have some neat stuff like videos and an automatically updating calendar, connected to the actual site. Couldn't get any of that to work no matter what I did. And so fucking often, I'd write in some code, and the entire thing would fucking break because a comma would be in the wrong place. Or I'd get one page working fine, work on another section, and go back to find the previous thing I worked on was broken. As a result, half the 100 or so hours I spent on the damn thing was not reflected in the actual final result, which was literally just menus and text. That said, the judges for my presentation were really impressed with it.
Basically, going through that convinced me I never wanted to do anything with computers.
>I have no degree at all, and no, I'm not talking about a bachelor's
Do you mean you spent all that time without getting a bachelors, or that you don't "even" have a bachelors. As in, you spent that time getting an associates or something.
For all the people talking about going into CS, I have a short story related to that. To graduate high school I had to do a "Senior project". Apparently it is a state requirement. The main point of it, as far as I can tell, was the presentation of it you had to do your senior year. Ready people for the professional world or something.
Anyway, the project could be anything, so most people did some random BS. I decided, since I had an "interest in computers/electronics" (Read: played lots of games and dicked around on the internet) that I would make a phone app. Just a simple informational thing for my school, I was literally going to rip everything from the school website. My dad even got me some 3rd party software that made it even easier to do. I thought it would be easy.
It was fucking hell. I had hoped to have some neat stuff like videos and an automatically updating calendar, connected to the actual site. Couldn't get any of that to work no matter what I did. And so fucking often, I'd write in some code, and the entire thing would fucking break because a comma would be in the wrong place. Or I'd get one page working fine, work on another section, and go back to find the previous thing I worked on was broken. As a result, half the 100 or so hours I spent on the damn thing was not reflected in the actual final result, which was literally just menus and text. That said, the judges for my presentation were really impressed with it.
Basically, going through that convinced me I never wanted to do anything with computers.
I wish i wasnt encouraged to go into STEM and wasted my life in CS. Why did the education system destroy any ounce of creativity or art in its students
I'm getting pretty tired of college and I'm only a week into the new semester now. I thought it would be better since I'm at a new campus, but (as should have been expected), it's worse than ever, especially the student population. I've been grinding through this stuff for nearly three years now and it's obvious that I'm going nowhere. My grades are good enough but once I'm out I'm fucked. I only chose my linguistics degree because I wanted to make my own conlangs like they used on Game of Thrones, I don't care about the field beyond that. I'm hoping to get into the military, I'll see if they let me in shortly. It'd be a nice escape. Then I'll just hoard all the money I get for the term I have to serve before avoiding work as long as possible and trying to opt out entirely. It's a pipe-dream but I don't want all of my hopes crushed.
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Feel like my brain is rotting from having to listen to all these stupid assholes drone on about trivial things every day. Bunch of dumb useless classes I have to take before finally getting my shitty piece of paper, all things I could teach myself.
I just started going back to school after 3 years of wageslavery since. I'm tired of working bottom tier work so I decided to try to get into a programming job with a degree. Since starting last week everything has been easy, but I am only taking easy classes so far, at least for the first semester, to complete requirements to get into harder classes.
My hardest class, although its easy and I've taken it before in highschool, is precalculus. I haven't done math in 3 years besides cram studying for a placement test when I applied to college, and our first math homework was a review test to see what level of math we were at, all stuff that I haven't done before. Today we got that homework back graded and looking around at the others around me getting a's and b's on it, while I got a c+ for some simple mistakes and other stuff I don't know what I did wrong. I'll try to get a 100 next time, but its really nerve wracking because looking this shit up online, it seems that getting anything less than an 4.0gpa a will screw me over when it comes for jobs or applying to a 4 year college (I'm in a 2 year community college), plus if I do fail then I'll have a worthless degree and loans I can't pay back. It's a really stressful feeling.
although, surprisingly, so far this is easier than highschool. My 2 online econ classes have 30 minute lectures and no homework, 10 questions quizes I can do multiple times, english is easy, and besides the first homework, precal seems really easy so far.
I hope I can get this over with as fast as possible though.
Can any other wizards here confirm what gpa I should try to get to land a job? is it really only a's? c's will get be screwed?
My hardest class, although its easy and I've taken it before in highschool, is precalculus. I haven't done math in 3 years besides cram studying for a placement test when I applied to college, and our first math homework was a review test to see what level of math we were at, all stuff that I haven't done before. Today we got that homework back graded and looking around at the others around me getting a's and b's on it, while I got a c+ for some simple mistakes and other stuff I don't know what I did wrong. I'll try to get a 100 next time, but its really nerve wracking because looking this shit up online, it seems that getting anything less than an 4.0gpa a will screw me over when it comes for jobs or applying to a 4 year college (I'm in a 2 year community college), plus if I do fail then I'll have a worthless degree and loans I can't pay back. It's a really stressful feeling.
although, surprisingly, so far this is easier than highschool. My 2 online econ classes have 30 minute lectures and no homework, 10 questions quizes I can do multiple times, english is easy, and besides the first homework, precal seems really easy so far.
I hope I can get this over with as fast as possible though.
Can any other wizards here confirm what gpa I should try to get to land a job? is it really only a's? c's will get be screwed?
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>>199180
I loathe being a brainlet, I can't stand not understanding a fucking thing my professor teaches in my math class and it's not even advanced math either, just regular algebra and having a hard time with that. I don't know if it was a good idea going to college considering my breeders keep forcing me to go or else i'll be on the streets, fuck fuck, i just hate being so fucking dumb, i'm useless and can't fucking do anything right. Why can't I die already?
I loathe being a brainlet, I can't stand not understanding a fucking thing my professor teaches in my math class and it's not even advanced math either, just regular algebra and having a hard time with that. I don't know if it was a good idea going to college considering my breeders keep forcing me to go or else i'll be on the streets, fuck fuck, i just hate being so fucking dumb, i'm useless and can't fucking do anything right. Why can't I die already?
>>206606
Most companies who put a minimum gpa on their job postings set it at 3.0. I've seen a couple with 3.2. (This is all programming or software related stuff btw).
Due to the nature of tech jobs I think personal projects and experience are valued more than gpa these days, but gpa is still used as a filter so if it's too low they might not even look at your resume. You'll find stories of people with low gpa getting jobs but usually it's because they're normalfags who had chemistry with a recruiter or interviewer. If you're here I'm guessing your social skills are not so good. People like us only have grades and personal projects to rely on, whereas the normalfags we're competing with have these plus social skills, connections, and extracurricular activities. We're already at a massive disadvantage so if we're lacking 1 of the only 2 things we can have going for us we're pretty much crippled.
I don't know how acceptance rates for transfers work so I can't help you there. Obviously it's going to differ by school though.
Also if you continue to struggle in precalc you might want to either consider a tech related degree that's not math intensive or look into certs. It sounds like your math might just be a little rusty which is fine. But if you continue to have trouble it'll only get worse if you choose something like computer science, which usually has calc, discrete math, probability, and linear algebra as requirements.
Most companies who put a minimum gpa on their job postings set it at 3.0. I've seen a couple with 3.2. (This is all programming or software related stuff btw).
Due to the nature of tech jobs I think personal projects and experience are valued more than gpa these days, but gpa is still used as a filter so if it's too low they might not even look at your resume. You'll find stories of people with low gpa getting jobs but usually it's because they're normalfags who had chemistry with a recruiter or interviewer. If you're here I'm guessing your social skills are not so good. People like us only have grades and personal projects to rely on, whereas the normalfags we're competing with have these plus social skills, connections, and extracurricular activities. We're already at a massive disadvantage so if we're lacking 1 of the only 2 things we can have going for us we're pretty much crippled.
I don't know how acceptance rates for transfers work so I can't help you there. Obviously it's going to differ by school though.
Also if you continue to struggle in precalc you might want to either consider a tech related degree that's not math intensive or look into certs. It sounds like your math might just be a little rusty which is fine. But if you continue to have trouble it'll only get worse if you choose something like computer science, which usually has calc, discrete math, probability, and linear algebra as requirements.
>>206607
You probably just have a math block. It's not uncommon, and it doesn't mean you're necessarily dumb. You seem articulate and intelligent in your speech, unlike some people. We can't all be MENSA fags, my wizard :)
You probably just have a math block. It's not uncommon, and it doesn't mean you're necessarily dumb. You seem articulate and intelligent in your speech, unlike some people. We can't all be MENSA fags, my wizard :)
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Why are you to torturing yourselves for nothing?
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>>206656
/dep/
/dep/
I'm 25 years old and an undergraduate because I was NEET for 5 years of my life. Constantly feel like I'm behind everybody else, uni is filled with turbonormies who are all younger than me and never shut the fuck up, nobody ever seems to read the required material. I wish I could go back to being a NEET autodidact, it somehow feels worse being this old and doing something than it would doing nothing.
>>206743
>noone does the required reading
I never read everything for my classes. You just look through the text for what you need for a given assignment.
>noone does the required reading
I never read everything for my classes. You just look through the text for what you need for a given assignment.
>>206743
Nobody does the required reading everyone gets the tests from last year memorizes them and they also often get someone that took the class before to give them the blueprint for how to do the projects. If you're not a normie be prepared to start a few steps behind everone else. Oh and they also get eachother jobs too once they graduate. One persone in a group will get a job and start bringing in thier buddies once they can. I saw this all the time in my engineering undergrad.
Nobody does the required reading everyone gets the tests from last year memorizes them and they also often get someone that took the class before to give them the blueprint for how to do the projects. If you're not a normie be prepared to start a few steps behind everone else. Oh and they also get eachother jobs too once they graduate. One persone in a group will get a job and start bringing in thier buddies once they can. I saw this all the time in my engineering undergrad.
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Decided to finally drop out. I just can't stand the people or the system anymore, literally just a bureaucratic factory for churning out obedient drones that can follow the rules. Can you cram all this shit and regurgitate it on paper? Can you show up X times at this lab thing and do some trivial exercise? Don't mind waiting in lines to take the exam or to write your grade in or the professor's signature for this bureaucratic formality?
I'm probably just making excuses for being a lazy unmotivated piece of shit but fuck all this. Fortunately, I got a job in my field so hopefully experience will be worth more than some piece of shit degree. Unfortunately, I'm still probably going to have stress dreams about exams until I can wash out the education system out of me.
I'm probably just making excuses for being a lazy unmotivated piece of shit but fuck all this. Fortunately, I got a job in my field so hopefully experience will be worth more than some piece of shit degree. Unfortunately, I'm still probably going to have stress dreams about exams until I can wash out the education system out of me.
>>206122
I am studying applied CS right now, or so it calls itself anyway.
I was always terrible at math, frankly I don't know how I managed to pass it at all in school but for some reason I always thought of it as very different from anything computer related.
This worked for the most part in my specialization course I had to take through hs but is murdering me now that I am in uni and topics like algorithms and cryptography are keeping me from progressing.
Almost 5 years of this shit and while I still can find the spark that gets me interested from time to time this lack of going anywhere and the black mist that is math is killing me.
I am studying applied CS right now, or so it calls itself anyway.
I was always terrible at math, frankly I don't know how I managed to pass it at all in school but for some reason I always thought of it as very different from anything computer related.
This worked for the most part in my specialization course I had to take through hs but is murdering me now that I am in uni and topics like algorithms and cryptography are keeping me from progressing.
Almost 5 years of this shit and while I still can find the spark that gets me interested from time to time this lack of going anywhere and the black mist that is math is killing me.
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All the middle class people make me uncomfortable. They talk about having visited Disney and how much they like dogs. They use gel in their hair and say fam out loud. Today a succubus mocked me for not having a car.
I don't want to go to school anymore.
I don't want to live with my family anymore.
I don't want to live in this pseudo-city anymore.
I don't want to take ADHD medication so I can pay attention.
I don't want to write papers and assignments anymore.
I don't want anything that's happening to me to be happening to me.
I wish someone would kidnap me and drop me off in some country on the other side of the planet, and then I wouldn't have to worry about any of this anymore.
I wish I could fall asleep forever.
I wish I would fall into a painting.
I wish everything was different.
I don't like this place.
I don't want to go to school anymore.
I don't want to live with my family anymore.
I don't want to live in this pseudo-city anymore.
I don't want to take ADHD medication so I can pay attention.
I don't want to write papers and assignments anymore.
I don't want anything that's happening to me to be happening to me.
I wish someone would kidnap me and drop me off in some country on the other side of the planet, and then I wouldn't have to worry about any of this anymore.
I wish I could fall asleep forever.
I wish I would fall into a painting.
I wish everything was different.
I don't like this place.
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>>207797
What degree was it? and was it worth it to drop out? if you have problems why not just ignore it?
What degree was it? and was it worth it to drop out? if you have problems why not just ignore it?
>>207818
It was CS. Made it to third year and did the mid-term and projects for most of my classes but I just couldn't stomach the place anymore. Been working at this place for some months now and its so relaxing, you checkout and you can stop thinking about it until tomorrow. Uni just felt like a neverending homework assignment, constantly procrastinating everything and always feeling guilty about not studying. I'm the kind of guy that can get obsessed with solving a problem and researching stuff for hours but it's impossible for me to muster the kind of sterile motivation you need for higher education.
I lucked into this job and it's as nice and satisfying as I thought programming would be. The only problem is I'm pretty nervous about not having a degree because normies won't even look at my resume unless I was churned out by a factory. I'd say I'm a competent programmer but without a degree I'll always be considered a pajeet code monkey. Oh well.
It was CS. Made it to third year and did the mid-term and projects for most of my classes but I just couldn't stomach the place anymore. Been working at this place for some months now and its so relaxing, you checkout and you can stop thinking about it until tomorrow. Uni just felt like a neverending homework assignment, constantly procrastinating everything and always feeling guilty about not studying. I'm the kind of guy that can get obsessed with solving a problem and researching stuff for hours but it's impossible for me to muster the kind of sterile motivation you need for higher education.
I lucked into this job and it's as nice and satisfying as I thought programming would be. The only problem is I'm pretty nervous about not having a degree because normies won't even look at my resume unless I was churned out by a factory. I'd say I'm a competent programmer but without a degree I'll always be considered a pajeet code monkey. Oh well.
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And another time I will fail a class because I failed to learn early enough, god I am never going to get out of this am I?
Instead of getting a decent job I'll just continue in my entry level IT job and never attain the privacy and comfort of my own home and money to spend on hobbies.
I am not even sure I can change at this point, I said to myself so often that I would do things differently now but it just dies as quick as it comes.
I tried watching, reading and listening to so many motivational material or some buff dude telling you to just do it but it never sticks.
I would take any other pain over this 5 year trip to hell.
In the end, this is just repenting and will likely vanish too in a day or two
Instead of getting a decent job I'll just continue in my entry level IT job and never attain the privacy and comfort of my own home and money to spend on hobbies.
I am not even sure I can change at this point, I said to myself so often that I would do things differently now but it just dies as quick as it comes.
I tried watching, reading and listening to so many motivational material or some buff dude telling you to just do it but it never sticks.
I would take any other pain over this 5 year trip to hell.
In the end, this is just repenting and will likely vanish too in a day or two
My parents got tired of me doing nothing all day so this year they made me take online classes. I hate studying in general and I have no interest in this material (accounting), I'm just going along with it to keep my parents off my back.
I have 3 presential tests next week, one monday and two tuesday and I haven't studied yet. I told myself I'll start friday and that 3 days of studying is enough but I'm not sure. I hope it is. At least I still have tomorrow to do nothing before I start studying seriously on friday.
I have 3 presential tests next week, one monday and two tuesday and I haven't studied yet. I told myself I'll start friday and that 3 days of studying is enough but I'm not sure. I hope it is. At least I still have tomorrow to do nothing before I start studying seriously on friday.
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>>207907
I thought I was the only one who's having problem learning and understanding. I just failed my math exam today, didn't get a score but I know I failed cause I guessed 75% on the entire test, it was a trainwreck and it was worth 55% of my grade, I just want to die, it's all just work and work and trying to learn and i'm a neet and my parents is gonna make me work so I got that up my ass now.
I thought I was the only one who's having problem learning and understanding. I just failed my math exam today, didn't get a score but I know I failed cause I guessed 75% on the entire test, it was a trainwreck and it was worth 55% of my grade, I just want to die, it's all just work and work and trying to learn and i'm a neet and my parents is gonna make me work so I got that up my ass now.
>>207907
it may not be enough for you, but for me an entry level tech job would be such a huge upgrade over my current, shitty minimum wage part-time retail job. may i ask how you got it? did you have any certifications or experience beforehand?
>I tried watching, reading and listening to so many motivational material or some buff dude telling you to just do it but it never sticks.
for me i find, it's more motivational to listen to someone who actually represents what i would want to be. in your example, the buff dude is probably relatable to a lot of guys because he represents their ideal of what they want to become. this helps them to identify with what he says. for my part, i feel much more motivated listening to a pale nerd talk about his passion for some tech than a buff guy talk about how he got succubi from lifting.
it may not be enough for you, but for me an entry level tech job would be such a huge upgrade over my current, shitty minimum wage part-time retail job. may i ask how you got it? did you have any certifications or experience beforehand?
>I tried watching, reading and listening to so many motivational material or some buff dude telling you to just do it but it never sticks.
for me i find, it's more motivational to listen to someone who actually represents what i would want to be. in your example, the buff dude is probably relatable to a lot of guys because he represents their ideal of what they want to become. this helps them to identify with what he says. for my part, i feel much more motivated listening to a pale nerd talk about his passion for some tech than a buff guy talk about how he got succubi from lifting.
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>it's another in-class group activity episode
Really simple shit with no need for group work but it took like 40 minutes because everyone was fucking around and trying to be funny with it. The entire time people around are spouting memes from old youtube videos and laughing obnoxiously. Then a couple of people started talking really loudly about anime. And I get to be the silent pariah, just like every other time there's a group activity.
Plus the first test I had in another class was all on material that the professor spent like 5% of time covering, instead of the other 95%. No study guide so I got mildly fucked over because I didn't study that 5% hard enough, basically just luck.
And the one elective I took which I thought I'd enjoy, related to literature, sucks. It's discussion based and every discussion there is "wow X author who was writing in the 19th century was really sexist, look at how he portrays succubi!" or just generic shit like "X author brings about such a dark tone with all these words he's using!". And of course the criteria for the paper I need to write is overly restrictive to the point of making it tedious.
FUCK this shit, I hate academia so much. I honestly would prefer being a corporate cuck because at least it brings in money and I don't feel like a jackass sitting in on these retarded classes and contemplating all the money wasted for these paltry lectures and discussions to take place. Thank god this is my last semester.
And at least my one class for tomorrow is canceled, so I can drink tonight.
Really simple shit with no need for group work but it took like 40 minutes because everyone was fucking around and trying to be funny with it. The entire time people around are spouting memes from old youtube videos and laughing obnoxiously. Then a couple of people started talking really loudly about anime. And I get to be the silent pariah, just like every other time there's a group activity.
Plus the first test I had in another class was all on material that the professor spent like 5% of time covering, instead of the other 95%. No study guide so I got mildly fucked over because I didn't study that 5% hard enough, basically just luck.
And the one elective I took which I thought I'd enjoy, related to literature, sucks. It's discussion based and every discussion there is "wow X author who was writing in the 19th century was really sexist, look at how he portrays succubi!" or just generic shit like "X author brings about such a dark tone with all these words he's using!". And of course the criteria for the paper I need to write is overly restrictive to the point of making it tedious.
FUCK this shit, I hate academia so much. I honestly would prefer being a corporate cuck because at least it brings in money and I don't feel like a jackass sitting in on these retarded classes and contemplating all the money wasted for these paltry lectures and discussions to take place. Thank god this is my last semester.
And at least my one class for tomorrow is canceled, so I can drink tonight.
>>207972
I like saving up my complaints and then submitting a multi-page essay about how much the class stinks at the end of the semester when they send you course evaluation surveys.
I like saving up my complaints and then submitting a multi-page essay about how much the class stinks at the end of the semester when they send you course evaluation surveys.
>>207972
Your school sounds like shit, the only classes I ever ran into annoying retards were mostly computer science related and some freshman courses. Actually, I dropped out of computer science because I hated those retards.
Your school sounds like shit, the only classes I ever ran into annoying retards were mostly computer science related and some freshman courses. Actually, I dropped out of computer science because I hated those retards.
>>207976
>the only classes I ever ran into annoying retards were mostly computer science related
lol guess what class that group activity was in.
I don't deny my school being shit though.
>the only classes I ever ran into annoying retards were mostly computer science related
lol guess what class that group activity was in.
I don't deny my school being shit though.
>>207980
Good luck, I don’t know why compsci attracts so many disgusting people with zero self-awareness. Even the rooms the classes were hosted in seemed to be permanently infused with body odor. The only class someone tried to bully me in college was intro to computer science a few years ago, fuck that shit. I thought about having to work with those people in the future and switched my studies to medicine.
Good luck, I don’t know why compsci attracts so many disgusting people with zero self-awareness. Even the rooms the classes were hosted in seemed to be permanently infused with body odor. The only class someone tried to bully me in college was intro to computer science a few years ago, fuck that shit. I thought about having to work with those people in the future and switched my studies to medicine.
This semester is a fucking massacre to me. I'm doing my last curse on mathematics in an econ. degree and it's being traumatic. I can't follow it. I simply can't. It's too hard for me and I'm too much of a brainlet. Worse part is that now I'm realizing that I shouldn't have pursued this degree and that this is not for me. Maybe I'm not that bad at some other stuff, but at this level of mathematics I just realized that a pure economics carreer its not for me. I'm probably doing another degree after finishing this and leaving this stuff (college is free here).
Can't believe I find uni kind of enjoyable now. My previous uni was hell. It's your normal uni where you have to study a shitload and build connections to survive. Then, I dropped out and joined the most uncompetitive university near my home. Nobody cares about studying and the teachers accommodate this fact. You need very little effort to pass, both academically and socially, and without the stress weighing down on me I am able to find studying a little fun now. I am kind of unsure about the job prospect of graduating from such a university but that's a problem for a latter day. Maybe some of you guys with similar problems can do the same.
This introductory statistics course is killing me. I physically cannot get my brain to focus on the words being spoken to me, nor can I even ask for help cause at this point they'd just be re explaining the whole course to me. Nothing makes any sense. All my other classes are going fine, even the one in which I have to do a group project but maths is just utter murder.
>>207998
You probably have a bad teacher. Make an effort and read it from a book, it's probably better that way. They're much more didactic than most of the teachers out there.
You probably have a bad teacher. Make an effort and read it from a book, it's probably better that way. They're much more didactic than most of the teachers out there.
>>207998
Also check out "jbstatistics" channel on youtube
https://www.youtube.com/user/jbstatistics/playlists
If you need any more help with the issue feel free to ask me via discord qwertyuiop#9189
Also check out "jbstatistics" channel on youtube
https://www.youtube.com/user/jbstatistics/playlists
If you need any more help with the issue feel free to ask me via discord qwertyuiop#9189
>>206122
I can practically say the same story about my degree in economics. Of course, maths here are way much easier than in CS, but nevertheless they are there and if pursuing an academic carreer in economics is basically being a mathematician. For years I've been doing exactly the same thing that you: building a narrative of how this might actually be my thing, even when history proves me wrong. I always struggled with math and even if I passed the courses, it was only because I put way too much effort in it, much more than in any other course. Now I'm in my last math course and I'm realizing this is not for me. It's a hard thing to realize that you practically lost five years doing something that will get you nowhere. I'm thinking of switching to sociology though I know the miserable prospects of it.
I can practically say the same story about my degree in economics. Of course, maths here are way much easier than in CS, but nevertheless they are there and if pursuing an academic carreer in economics is basically being a mathematician. For years I've been doing exactly the same thing that you: building a narrative of how this might actually be my thing, even when history proves me wrong. I always struggled with math and even if I passed the courses, it was only because I put way too much effort in it, much more than in any other course. Now I'm in my last math course and I'm realizing this is not for me. It's a hard thing to realize that you practically lost five years doing something that will get you nowhere. I'm thinking of switching to sociology though I know the miserable prospects of it.
After being unable to find a job I decided to take a welding course in college because I heard they were in need. I did OK in the welding itself but I crushed the theory, math, electives, engineering drawings, mechanical repair, etc. Because I studied my ass off. Probably like 25-30 hours a week.
Graduated top of my class, 91 average.
Did a couple extra advanced classes online a welding engineering technologist course an hour and a half away, signed up and got in.
Found out it's grade 7 math and all our group assignments are basically those hypothesis /method/observations/conclusion labs you did in grade school science. About half succubi. Got thrown in a group with two 19 year old fuck ups (I'm 34) who show up late, high, dont even bring pencils, take 30 minute breaks in a 3 hour class, spend the rest of the time on their smartphones. Recently had a sit down where we had to talk about feelings because I called one of them a lazy asshole and asked to be in my own group of one. Now the class hates me and I am told I cant even write the assignments because the words I use are too big and my classmates clearly havent contributed. So shop classes are literally me standing around staring into space waiting for these useless fuckwits do their homework in class. Home work. The shit you do at home.
I got bamboozled so instead of making 100k as a skilled tradesman I will probably drop out and work nights as a janitor for 14 bucks an hour.
Going to suicide. Bye.
Graduated top of my class, 91 average.
Did a couple extra advanced classes online a welding engineering technologist course an hour and a half away, signed up and got in.
Found out it's grade 7 math and all our group assignments are basically those hypothesis /method/observations/conclusion labs you did in grade school science. About half succubi. Got thrown in a group with two 19 year old fuck ups (I'm 34) who show up late, high, dont even bring pencils, take 30 minute breaks in a 3 hour class, spend the rest of the time on their smartphones. Recently had a sit down where we had to talk about feelings because I called one of them a lazy asshole and asked to be in my own group of one. Now the class hates me and I am told I cant even write the assignments because the words I use are too big and my classmates clearly havent contributed. So shop classes are literally me standing around staring into space waiting for these useless fuckwits do their homework in class. Home work. The shit you do at home.
I got bamboozled so instead of making 100k as a skilled tradesman I will probably drop out and work nights as a janitor for 14 bucks an hour.
Going to suicide. Bye.
I HIGHLY recommend online classes if you're doing generic bullshit. I can do all my work in no time, and the answers are usually on Quizlet. Check RateMyProfessor to see if the prof requires essays, if not, you're golden. I'm able to sustain my NEET hobbies while making some progress in life. In person school made me want to kill myself.
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>>207916
I feel you, I never quite grasped how to learn topics deliberatly, I have to have the luck of being actively interested into something in order to make it work.
At least you had the courage to show up to the test, I simply avoided the exam alltogether.
>>207934
>may i ask how you got it? did you have any certifications or experience beforehand?
Where I live student jobs are quite common so a lot of places are generally open to people studying related fields even if you have not completed anything formally.
>it's more motivational to listen to someone who actually represents what i would want to be
That sounds like a decent plan, then again it's difficult to find CS people doing more motivational stuff while not being shallow.
>>207954
It's not just being employable for me but also a lot of self worth, I want to be able to know that I managed to attain something despite its difficulty or what others said.
Redemption before my own conciousness so to speak.
>>207998
Have you tried picking it up through a book instead? It can help to have something that doesn't look at you in vague disgust when you have a question about something basic
I feel you, I never quite grasped how to learn topics deliberatly, I have to have the luck of being actively interested into something in order to make it work.
At least you had the courage to show up to the test, I simply avoided the exam alltogether.
>>207934
>may i ask how you got it? did you have any certifications or experience beforehand?
Where I live student jobs are quite common so a lot of places are generally open to people studying related fields even if you have not completed anything formally.
>it's more motivational to listen to someone who actually represents what i would want to be
That sounds like a decent plan, then again it's difficult to find CS people doing more motivational stuff while not being shallow.
>>207954
It's not just being employable for me but also a lot of self worth, I want to be able to know that I managed to attain something despite its difficulty or what others said.
Redemption before my own conciousness so to speak.
>>207998
Have you tried picking it up through a book instead? It can help to have something that doesn't look at you in vague disgust when you have a question about something basic
>>208060
>At least you had the courage to show up to the test, I simply avoided the exam alltogether.
I did that too. And now my parents keep pestering me for a month now. They want me to advance in sudies, work and slavery and get a normal life, even tough i don't want and i can't do any of it. I can't stand wageslavery. It's like i don't matter at all, as long as i get some worthless money.
How are you doing? Don't you get moraled out every single day for failing and not getting better jobs or a job they want you to get?
>At least you had the courage to show up to the test, I simply avoided the exam alltogether.
I did that too. And now my parents keep pestering me for a month now. They want me to advance in sudies, work and slavery and get a normal life, even tough i don't want and i can't do any of it. I can't stand wageslavery. It's like i don't matter at all, as long as i get some worthless money.
How are you doing? Don't you get moraled out every single day for failing and not getting better jobs or a job they want you to get?
>>208043
>Got thrown in a group with two 19 year old fuck ups who show up late, high, dont even bring pencils, take 30 minute breaks in a 3 hour class, spend the rest of the time on their smartphones
That's how education is nowadays. Just get over it as soon as you can.
>Got thrown in a group with two 19 year old fuck ups who show up late, high, dont even bring pencils, take 30 minute breaks in a 3 hour class, spend the rest of the time on their smartphones
That's how education is nowadays. Just get over it as soon as you can.
>>208063
I have exams only twice a year and for some reason my boss is happy with me, for now.
What I mean by this is that I get a reprieve as the bad stuff tends to built up into shorter timeframes though with my increasing numbers of semesters the dread of no sense of progression is gnawing its way into the daily life.
As for parents, I keep the exact details of my studying hidden from them and I'd take it over seeing the dissapointment in their faces.
>How are you doing?
I don't know how to put it honestly sometimes I think I am doing decently having a small but decent job and studying after all and then on other days it seems like all that sunshine was just me decieving myself and that I am barely above ground floor with few credits and people overtaking me.
How are you doing? Do you have somewhere to go, figurative or literally?
I have exams only twice a year and for some reason my boss is happy with me, for now.
What I mean by this is that I get a reprieve as the bad stuff tends to built up into shorter timeframes though with my increasing numbers of semesters the dread of no sense of progression is gnawing its way into the daily life.
As for parents, I keep the exact details of my studying hidden from them and I'd take it over seeing the dissapointment in their faces.
>How are you doing?
I don't know how to put it honestly sometimes I think I am doing decently having a small but decent job and studying after all and then on other days it seems like all that sunshine was just me decieving myself and that I am barely above ground floor with few credits and people overtaking me.
How are you doing? Do you have somewhere to go, figurative or literally?
I feel a very big sense of dread and depression coming on. I'm going to fail a class, no doubt, and I'm but three semesters from getting out. I have no idea if I will, and I really don't want to stay. I don't want to do this any more. I don't want to be near my parents or siblings any more. I never want to see anyone I used to know again, no one from school. I had no friends, don't assume that. They knew me though, my ambitions. They didn't know my inhibitions though. I was never going to graduate community college.
I guess my life will be constricted to getting a job somewhere far away. How do I do this, how do I rent, how do I do anything? I'm a little baby in this regard, and I know nothing of the outside world.
I never want to see anyone again, and even though I will literally be a wageslave, it's better than doing this for another year while my siblings continue their lives. I have no want to be normal with a wife and kids, so don't think it. It's that graduating college is something I thought I never would do and I know I'll never do. It's so easy to people, and it's obvious that I'll never do it. I'm defective, I guess. I'm defective, and defective things go into the trash. I have no intention of going there yet, but I know if my life's bound to wageslavery, then death is preferable. I might as well say it loud and proud. I might as well disregard my family and carve my own path because without them, nothing but myself, my hope in myself, will hold me back.
I guess my life will be constricted to getting a job somewhere far away. How do I do this, how do I rent, how do I do anything? I'm a little baby in this regard, and I know nothing of the outside world.
I never want to see anyone again, and even though I will literally be a wageslave, it's better than doing this for another year while my siblings continue their lives. I have no want to be normal with a wife and kids, so don't think it. It's that graduating college is something I thought I never would do and I know I'll never do. It's so easy to people, and it's obvious that I'll never do it. I'm defective, I guess. I'm defective, and defective things go into the trash. I have no intention of going there yet, but I know if my life's bound to wageslavery, then death is preferable. I might as well say it loud and proud. I might as well disregard my family and carve my own path because without them, nothing but myself, my hope in myself, will hold me back.
I'm not even through the second month of the semester and I'm already starting to consider giving up. Each day I get more tired of doing the same stuff.
It's not even about how hard the classes are or having to study 14 hours a day, it's about having to socialize just because the teachers think everyone should do it and it's somehow healthy. For example, having to make a project with 2 dickheads that removes me from the conversation and then say that I haven't participated isn't something nice.
I can't do this anymore.
>>208087
>How do I do this, how do I rent, how do I do anything? I'm a little baby in this regard, and I know nothing of the outside world.
I believe that there's a lot of people in the same spot as you. Have you tried googling those things? It usually helps me with some stuff.
It's not even about how hard the classes are or having to study 14 hours a day, it's about having to socialize just because the teachers think everyone should do it and it's somehow healthy. For example, having to make a project with 2 dickheads that removes me from the conversation and then say that I haven't participated isn't something nice.
I can't do this anymore.
>>208087
>How do I do this, how do I rent, how do I do anything? I'm a little baby in this regard, and I know nothing of the outside world.
I believe that there's a lot of people in the same spot as you. Have you tried googling those things? It usually helps me with some stuff.
>>208076
>How are you doing? Do you have somewhere to go, figurative or literally?
Not at all. To be honest with you, the last time i got out of my house was two weeks ago. After fucking up with the exam, i think i have nothing to do outside anymore as my dad takes care of all the trivial necessities i have. I have problems interacting with strangers and my mental state keeps me at bay even further which is why i always strived to be as sedentary as possible. I waste most of my time in front of the computer, sleeping and coping with pain.
I asked because you seem to be doing it way better than me. At least you have a job and a normalish life. I, on other hand, simply ignore and deal with all the difficulties that get in my way.
>How are you doing? Do you have somewhere to go, figurative or literally?
Not at all. To be honest with you, the last time i got out of my house was two weeks ago. After fucking up with the exam, i think i have nothing to do outside anymore as my dad takes care of all the trivial necessities i have. I have problems interacting with strangers and my mental state keeps me at bay even further which is why i always strived to be as sedentary as possible. I waste most of my time in front of the computer, sleeping and coping with pain.
I asked because you seem to be doing it way better than me. At least you have a job and a normalish life. I, on other hand, simply ignore and deal with all the difficulties that get in my way.
>>208106
>Not at all. To be honest with you
If that's the case it might be the crux of your situation compared to mine, having something to go for be it out of will, hope or stubborness can make a difference; and I do mean anything.
Which is not to say that it makes much go away as you can see from my posts but so far it has proven to be something that makes me get out of bed when not much speaks for doing so.
Where I am is not that high up so I am sure you can get there as well.
>Not at all. To be honest with you
If that's the case it might be the crux of your situation compared to mine, having something to go for be it out of will, hope or stubborness can make a difference; and I do mean anything.
Which is not to say that it makes much go away as you can see from my posts but so far it has proven to be something that makes me get out of bed when not much speaks for doing so.
Where I am is not that high up so I am sure you can get there as well.
I don't want my parents talking about my school life. They said my life should be school. I am more than that. I am a culmination of my hobbies, dreams, and desires. I'm going to fully forbid talking about school from now on. If I fail, I'll leave, I don't really care any more. I just don't want to be homeless.
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>>208222
School isn't your life, but working and getting money is if you want to survive, I had dreams and hopes too and it's been crushed by the fact I have no money to do my dream and passion, being poor and working so much is suffering on its own, just focus on school and try to get a very good paying job, no matter how annoying your parents are.
School isn't your life, but working and getting money is if you want to survive, I had dreams and hopes too and it's been crushed by the fact I have no money to do my dream and passion, being poor and working so much is suffering on its own, just focus on school and try to get a very good paying job, no matter how annoying your parents are.
>>208223
This, if you don't take your head out of your ass and stop focusing on ideals now you're just going to learn the hard way later on, and it'll be much worse.
This, if you don't take your head out of your ass and stop focusing on ideals now you're just going to learn the hard way later on, and it'll be much worse.
anyone feels that the years to complete a uni degree (5 years here) are long?
Specially when you fail/stop and start again in between.
It's quite a long time when oyu think about it.
Specially when you fail/stop and start again in between.
It's quite a long time when oyu think about it.
>>208885
its taken me 6 years to half-complete an associates degree, it's such a struggle when you have mental health problems
its taken me 6 years to half-complete an associates degree, it's such a struggle when you have mental health problems
Most of the posts in this thread are coming from Americans. Any fellow Brits in here? I recently graduated from a 3-year degree programme and am currently comfy at home, don't particularly feel the urge to apply for a job yet. Not sure what the equivalent of community college would be over here, pretty much every university here charges the same fee whether it's a top university like Oxford or Cambridge or a bottom university like Wrexham or a former polytechnic
My mother is pushing me to study a master's degree. I dread working but I don't want to step into a university again.
>>208910
That's rather unexpected, at least from me looking at the master classes they look like they cover actually interesting and state of the art stuff opposed to a lot of bachelors classes.
That's rather unexpected, at least from me looking at the master classes they look like they cover actually interesting and state of the art stuff opposed to a lot of bachelors classes.
>university
worst time of my life
youngfags
project work
writing endless word documents
worst time of my life
I am glad I quit as soon as I didnt need it anymore
worst time of my life
youngfags
project work
writing endless word documents
worst time of my life
I am glad I quit as soon as I didnt need it anymore
>>208910
You need to take control of your life. Some succubus shouldn't be able to tell you what to do.
You need to take control of your life. Some succubus shouldn't be able to tell you what to do.
Studying is still painful for me. Even after all these years. It never gets easier.
Who else here needs motivation to finish their degree? Let's help each other out.
Go study after you read my post other wizzie!
Who else here needs motivation to finish their degree? Let's help each other out.
Go study after you read my post other wizzie!
>>208973
you don't really need to study if you need some stupid motivation from the internet
you don't really need to study if you need some stupid motivation from the internet
>>208911
Most of them are toilet paper I lost interest in my field on the third year so the few that could be worth something don't attract me at all either. Plus I hate the education system.
Most of them are toilet paper I lost interest in my field on the third year so the few that could be worth something don't attract me at all either. Plus I hate the education system.
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