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Depression

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File: 1587068974802-0.jpg (15.77 KB, 456x284, 114:71, anti depressant.jpg) ImgOps iqdb

 No.218735[Last 50 Posts]

Anyone here tried those? What did they do.

My shrink prescribed me Wellbutrin for fatigue which I took for 3 months or so, but they didn't do shit except reduce nicotine cravings. Apparently it's also prescribed for smoking cessation for which it worked wonders actually.
Shrink didn't want to prescribe me other AD's because those have heavier side effects and she thinks it wouldn't be worth it since they usually make fatigue worse and are more for anxiouspatients.

I also tried a bunch of nootropics, but none of those did anything. If you have experience, share those aswell

 No.218736

i've gain weight on them. i'm a fat fuck now

 No.218741

It made me quite apathetic for the first couple weeks then it lost its effect.

 No.218743

File: 1587073444271.png (1.48 MB, 800x1363, 800:1363, 800px-A_Dream_of_the_Futur….png) ImgOps iqdb

I was on a couple different ones and probably all in all took them for maybe two years but am not currently taking one.

I noticed a few different things, I think that it did help with my anxiety in retrospect. At the time I didnt really think that it did but I probably acted the most consistently confident during that time.
I dont think they helped at all with fatigue and possibly made it worse, along with giving me some insomnia.
I also noticed that I liked listening to music a lot more whenever I was on one.
Im not sure that they numb your sexual appetite but I remember that I lost sensitivity in my genitals.
I'm not really sure they are worth it, you could give them a try but when I was taking them I didnt really notice much aside from the genital thing.
They really didnt help me with motivation or energy, I think maybe I acted different. Its hard to tell

 No.218744

Nootropics are a spoook

 No.218745

they won't get you to earn more money

 No.218750

>>218744

I tried CBD and it actually makes me feel better for a while. No miracle cure, but definetely no snake oil

 No.218751

>>218735
One cannot take those while living the same life that got you depressed in the first place and expect changes.
However life isn't so forgiving about giving you chances to do meaningful changes or a start from zero from almost 3 decades of emotional baggage you cant disappear with pills.

Psychiatry still at its baby steps so most professionals will give an educated guess on the choice of a treatment and secretly hope that's what sticks so you can become an useful member of society, whatever that means.

 No.218770

>>218735
Did wellbutrin for years it slightly took the edge off but other wise nothing. From other drugs ive had really negative side effects like delayed ejaculation and that was horrible.

All in all would not recommend bothering with these drugs for too long unless you are shooting for disability. Might be worth trying a few to see if you feel better but after half a year on a drug dump it and switch or pull out all together.

 No.218771

I've tried many, many, different antidepressants, they all do the same thing, that is, reduce your ability to feel emotions at all. Not only will you feel less depressed, but you will feel less everything, which in itself is frustrating and depressing. Also, from someone with severe social anxiety, they didn't help in the slightest for that. The name the doctors give these things. "antidepressants" is the biggest false marketing in existence, they are trash, they won't help you if you are truly depressed and in a shit situation, they'll just make you feel wrong because your emotions won't line up with what's real. The end goal of all antidepressants is to destroy your ability to have dynamic emotion in favor of keeping you at a baseline feeling of apathy.

 No.218780

>>218771
I can confirm this.

When I was 15 (I was already a trainwreck back then) and the shrink told me that I was depressed (fucking obvious) and that I should take prozac I was innocently happy thinking that all my mental problems would go away,my mom opposed and I didn't took them.

Only when I was 22 and aleady wanting to kill myself again my mom agreed to buy me prozac,and it just kills all emotions,you feel nothing,I wouldn't even say "like a zombie" is a very strange feeling.

 No.218791


I still felt stuff, but that's because my life was still objectively shit.

The important thing is if you take them you have to stop taking them gradually. I had a really averse reaction to sudden discontinuation and it sucked donkey.


https://www.ecnp.eu/presentationpdfs/73/P.078.pdf

It's like this guy.

For a few months, I actually had more energy than ever but it was not a good thing.
I felt a lot more alive to say the least.

 No.218793

Wellbutrin is straight fucking trash.

 No.218794

>>218771
Antidepressants work, but not for wizards or depressions without a cause. If you are sad that your father died, that's treatable. Bad career choice? Hard, but an objective. SO left you/died in a tragic way? Normal.

Depression that doesn't have an origin or a cause, it's not treatable. These doctos are liars, snake oil salesman, that treat you because they have deals with those drug companies. Hell, it might be even more simple, you are paying em, or someone is. If it's the goverment, I imagine that there's a bonus if they have a big number of patients.

 No.218795

>>218780

It's like you are floating away. You feel like you are in a dream. When you are in a dream, things feel real, but they are not as tangible as in reality. That's what I felt when I was on the highest dose of wellbutrin. Straight fucking trash

 No.219000

>>218771
>>218780
You shouldn't take these pills if you still have authentic emotions. They only can work if you already are a zombie so that the pills have a chance to make your emotions come back annihilating the zombie state. People who complain that these pills make them numb and hollow weren't depressed in the first place, depression is not muh feeling sad or having a bad day but feeling nothing at all but pure apathy for an extended period of time.

 No.219021

I took Paxil for a few months and it definitely had a serious effect on my mood. Hard to describe because I didn't necessarily feel "better", but I felt a lot more "stable", like if something went horrible at work I wouldn't spiral as much into self hatred, nightmares of getting fired, etc. But on the other hand it just accelerated my anhedonia.

Then the doctor added Wellbutrin because I was having trouble with the side effects (Paxil kills the appetite and I was already underweight).
Wellbutrin is a scary drug, over the 10 days I took it I became progressively more agitated, angry at others, easily panicked, and paranoid. But the fact something was going wrong didn't surface until the hallucinations started. First it was tapping on the window, then it was voices at the door, maybe it got worse after that but all I remember is being scared and emailing the doctor to say I'm stopping the medication.
Apparently psychosis is a rare side effect of Wellbutrin.
Anyway I don't do psychiatric drugs anymore.

 No.219024

File: 1587449084775.png (622.08 KB, 472x494, 236:247, 1586633368708-1.png) ImgOps iqdb

I have "Pure O" ocd. Going to be trying an antidepressant soon to hopefully help with intrusive thoughts I've been having. May God help me, these thoughts make me want to off myself. I'm will to "become a zombie" if it means that the thoughts go away.

 No.219029

>>219024
they don't go away

 No.219030


 No.219043

>>219024
anti-depressants don't do shit for anyone but just numb you like a retard, just don't bother and deal with the thoughts or put a bullet through your head.

 No.219142

I take 100mg quetiapine, aka Seroquel every day. It doesn't help with my depression or anxiety, but it makes me tired enough to sleep 12+ hours a day.

 No.219263

>>218735 prozac/fluoxtine
couldn't sleep and was unstable then lost effect. last thing it worked for me wore off and im getting kicked even from private therapy soon.

opening up when there are consequences outside of my control is too hard.

 No.219269

Paroxetine for a few months. Got rid of the suicidal thoughts and some of the anxiety for a while, I didn't really feel more productive though, just felt slightly less shit and my head was a lot clearer.

 No.219299

>>218794
I've heard the opposite, antidepressants work for the minority who have depression without cause and barely benefits those who have depression with those things you mentioned

 No.219300

>>219299
yeah, to be honest, they really didn't work for me because my life sucks independently. my life didn't suck because I was depressed; I was depressed because it is and was shit

my dad is a fucking schizo but he liked to lecture on "chemical imbalance" depression shit and liked to threaten me with institutionalization due to my suicide ideation and I was like fuck you asshole and he ended up in the slammer and then the bin

 No.219301

If you want mind-altering substances then use the things that actually work, i.e. that people enjoy. Illegal drugs like marijuana, opiates, etc.
If antidepressants actually worked they would be obviously addictive and then be made illegal due to """abuse"""

 No.219302

like one time he fucking threatened me into "getting help" and going on SSRIs even though he didn't believe in taking drugs when it came to himself

the main difference is I hated myself for failures and not being able to do shit so of course suicide will seem like the best option if there's no practical way to solve your problems.

on the other hand, he liked to indulge in persecutory delusions and saying he was under too much pressure. I've heard that schizophrenic delusions are a defense mechanism to avoid harm to self-esteem.

anyway sorry but needed to vent.

 No.219303

>>219302
You can overcome past failures with work and success anon, no amount of jew pills or real drugs like marijuana or opiates(with the exception of maybe ketamine) are going to help. Tbh I hope you don't inherit ur father's schizophrenia

 No.219304

>>219303
>You can overcome past failures with work and success
Imagine your life going so well that you actually believe things like that.

 No.219310

>>219304
If you think you're a failure the antidote is to become successful, sounds common sense if failure is what's bringing somebody down

 No.219312

>>219310
>just be successful brah that'll fix ur failure problem
Lol, as if it's a choice to fail or succeed at anything and lifelong failures just forgot to be successful all their lives. What a revelation.

 No.219313

>>219304
>>219310


I mean in an ideal world it'd be the case that you could, but as an adult, chances are pretty limited; the more you fail the further from success you are.

only redeeming quality of this me not having kids so my failures at least are my problems exclusively

I'm 3 years older now than I was when my dad had me.

 No.219315

>>218771
>reduce your ability to feel emotions at all
Joke's on antidepressants I don't feel emotions already.

 No.219316

>>219024
>>219029
They do. I'm a zombie. I have to force myself to feel now, which isn't really possible.

 No.219317

>>219263
>im getting kicked even from private therapy soon.
How does one get kicked from being someone's cashcow?

 No.219321

>>219315
That's what I said earlier, antidepressivas are made for people like you.

 No.219323

>>219317
happened to me, the therapist eventually gets so tired of you that you're not even worth the money you pay

 No.219332

>>219323
Wow! How did the rapist even tell you that? Was it polite?

 No.219334

>>219312
Yeah,not everyone is gonna make it, including me

 No.219337

>>219312
there is some retard normie wisdom. if you can tap into the power source of coasting through life on societal support and success, you can do something.
if

 No.219341

>>218744
I would disagree armodafinil can get me out of a rut just don't rely on it like any medication.

 No.219343

>>219332
she started canceling a bunch of my appointments, making me reschedule, then she left a message on my phone saying she quit and blocked my number

 No.219344

yeah, therapists don't actually want to deal with asocial/abnormal people

 No.219410

>>219343
Holy shit.

>>219344
I don't think there's anything they can really do for that kind of thing anyway. There isn't really for anxiety, as far I know the CBT type of stuff that they use works a bit for normans where the trigger is reasonably specific, but not really when it's pervasive. And just not having any inclination to do it (as in, adopt whatever "it" is that's the desired behavior that is the reason you were sent there) is another matter entirely.

 No.219415

>>219410
What I've been told is basically they have cbt/social skills training, but I think that's basically rehearsing certain scenarios. It'd be too difficult to basically have to put on a professional acting performance every day to hide my wizard levels.

 No.219428

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>>218735
Have any wizards tried ketamine or 2-FDCK? 2-FDCK from my experience seems to have a strong antidepressant effect that lasts a few days.

 No.219429

>>218735
I take St. John's wort sometimes, and it seems somewhat effective. I've also tried lion's mane mushroom and tianeptine, but they don't seem nearly as effective.

 No.219430

File: 1588125816743.jpg (318.74 KB, 1857x963, 619:321, anime girl on computer.jpg) ImgOps iqdb

I actually really like Wellbutrin, I went from an anhedonic NEET who does nothing all day but browse imageboards, to writing long introspective posts on here and on r*ddit, I also went from barely playing any video games to playing 40 hours a week. If you have anhedonia I would recommend it.

 No.219431

>>218735
Atomoxetine 25g 60g
>Made me tired, like reaaaaaally tired
>I was a husk of a human
>literaly too tired to feel miserable
>literaly too tired too feel anything
>I could sleep for a whole day and night no breaks in between and get up feeling like i just sleept for 2 hours
>The closes thing i can related it to is being drunk
>The fuafua feeling
I hate it
Currently taking extended-release methylphenidate ITS FUCKING GRAT.

 No.219434

>>219431
Yeah, to be honest, stims are the only real depression cure in terms of lethargy, but unfortunately they don't make me smarter.

 No.219440

I tried several different kinds of anti-depressants and anti-psychotics, it all started in highschool probably around 17yo, of course I was the lone, bullied, ignored kid in school, I insisted on being mute during classes and breaks so bullies would just ignore me instead of the usual physical abuse, so I developed depression, anxiety,agoraphobia and later on schizophrenia.
Being schizophrenic really fucked with me and my already declining mental health, I would see shadows and hear voices then it became even worse I began seeing an image of myself from when I was a kid and sometimes it felt like a vivid dreams, the voices were pushing me to suicide, one day I slit my wrist and got admitted into a mental health hospital.

I was on
(Clozapine,Aripiprazole,Olanzapine,Prozac, and recently Anfranil)
So mostly anti-psychotics combined with two different anti-depressants.

>They made me so tired that I would sleep for over 20 hour

>I went from 70kg to 134kg and it actually fucked with my self-esteem and overall confidence
>My saliva was so excessive that I'd uncontrollably spit on myself and that was so fucking embarrassing
>I became so aggressive that I would hit myself in the face several times until the rage goes away
>According to my family I made weird noises and sounds while I was asleep
>Body trembling, coldness, shaky hands
>Hallucinations got worse and I tried to kill myself 5 times over the course of two years
>Completely lost sensitivity in my genitals, developed erectile dysfunction.

A Sudden discontinuation of these meds gave me horrible withdrawals which I couldn't take for more than 2days, right now I'm on Anfranil and Olanzapine, no hallucinations so far but still depressed and anhedonic.

 No.219441

i quit them because they made lsd (which i use to meditate to be with my waifu) weaker and they did fuck all except make fapping a chore and making me lazy and chubby. If i want to feel normal i just pop benzo's but they're super addictive and i've had 6 or so seizures from running out and psychiatrists and doctors are twats who won't prescribe them, so have to get em off black markets

 No.219442

>>219440

There is a post about Olanzapine here in Wizchan. You should really stop that poison, slowly if you feel the sudden reaction, but to leave it at a long term..

 No.219503

>>219431
In my country the drug they give to everyone is citalopram I presume because most people tolerate it and it's cheap. I had the same reaction you did - slept 20 hours a day and as soon as I was awake, I could put my head on the pillow and sleep another 20 hours. I would wake up for those 2 hours like you describe, the drunk feeling of stumbling up the stairs not connected to your body or surroundings.

Woke up in a soiled bed, missed appointments. I took it while at university so I stayed in my room for 2 months sleeping the world away until I ran out of pills and came off it. Get up, walk to 24hour shop on the corner if I was hungry, take pills, go back to sleep - how I spent those 2 hours awake. I convinced myself these are the side effects people say they have to just push through, but most people do not react like that.

I say this because I'm actually using 80mg atomoxetine now because someone in my family had months and months supply they never used. I am having almost no negative reaction, they may be having a slight improvement in places but not helping my mood disorder ( they apparently can help major depression which is why I tried them ).

I'm just sharing this because it's so absurd that some of us have these insane side effects to the same drugs others have no side effect to, and vice-versa.

 No.219507

>>219441
>psychiatrists and doctors are twats who won't prescribe them
like 90% of doctors I've been to have given me benzos, including general practitioners and psychiatrists, maybe you just don't present symptoms severe enough

 No.219540

>>219503
I got prescribed citalopram and ran out but i didn't get more, but the withdrawal caused me to become manic for several months and I did a lot of stupid shit. I had never been manic before and haven't been since. I didn't really feel much better while I was on it, still lethargic but i had classes so I couldn't just sleep all day like I had during the summer.

 No.220206

>>219503
> I'm actually using 80mg atomoxetine now
Jusus christ man, hang in there the best advise i can give you is eat, doesnt matter what just eat plus i bet you arent hungry, but eat even if its an apple just bite, chew, and swallow with your eyes closed with some music, it really helps you to eat.
If you can get thiamine for those days when you really need to do stuff, and change to other stuff as soon as possible It wont get better, itl make you feel even worse, and whatever you do dont try to feel, just dont if you get the craving to feel stop taking them by reducing the dose slowly, i got to the point were i stick syringes in my sking, or rub my arm with a box opener and damp it with alcohol just to feel.
Good luck man

 No.220276

>>218735
Been on both Fluoxetine and Citalopram. I preferred the former as the deadening of pleasant emotions was lesser. Citalopram also had wicked withdrawal effects when I stopped taking it too abruptly, I was more or less bedridden for a week and a half with severe vertigo.
SSRIs seem to have very similar effects; Limiting the feeling of emotions and making certain thoughts less noticable as a result. In my case it made getting up for school/work easier as all the little things like feeling tired, cold or bored didn't seem to matter anymore. They don't make you happy and they don't get rid of your depression if the reasons you are depressed are still there. I could see a use case for them if taken while being guided through a series of actions that would get you away from the sources of your depression like moving away from shitty parents or transitioning from a decade of NEEThood into full employment for financial security.
After a certain point all I wanted was to stop taking them. For all the numbing of emotions after a while everything feels wrong. It made me more productive but if anything only exacerbated my anhedonia, making the productivity seem like a waste of effort. I suppose they also indirectly helped my anxiety but did so in a way that made me apathetic even towards things I shouldn't be, that was a problem when I didn't care enough to be polite to my boss and customers.

 No.220278

How come I never hear anything about anti-depressants working, but they are ALWAYS recommended?

 No.220283

>>220278
They're not bad to try if you're suicidal because it's worth at least seeing if something helps. It just has a low rate of helping. If you really want to feel happier if only temporarily, try weed.

 No.220294

>>220278
Because they cost pennies to produce and work well enough to make norms care less about their soulless daily grind. The side effects aren't rare but they're almost all temporary so it's seen as little long term risk in handing them out like candy.

 No.220340

>>219142
I started seroquel recently. 25mg twice a day and 50 or 75 mg at night for sleep. It worked well for sleep the first few days but I developed tolerance and I've been increasing it. I took 150 mg last night and it didn't even knock me out. I'm very concerned with how fast I'm developing a tolerance and how horrible the withdrawls are going to be. I think I should start stepping it down and try to get off it before it's too late.

 No.220342

>>220340
I have been taking Seroquel for the last year and a half as an add on medication.
I have only ever taken it before I went to sleep and did not develop a tolerance for it.
After i had a seizure in February which my psychiatrist linked to the high dosage he reduced it to 75mg.
Even when the dose was so drastically reduced, I never had the problem of it not knocking me out at night.
For me Seroquel was a massive help in fixing my sleep schedule which was a great factor in allowing me fix up other aspects of my life.

 No.220343

>>220342
I forgot to say that i went from 300 to 75mg

 No.220344

>>220278
People who they work for aren't talking about it online really. There's not much to say about them when they work because you just feel better and everything is different. In a lot of more norman depression forums you will find a lot of people talking about how depression meds are working, often many of them complaining about side effects. Some of them discussing how they stopped working after a while and had to change. "I'm sorry they aren't working for you, it took a few meds before it worked for me, keep trying" is all can really be said by those it works for.

The majority of the population that take antidepressants only use them for a short time to help them through a period of under 12 months, of which they seem to help a lot of people although there is debate about it. There is a selection bias because online and in these communities.

 No.220366


 No.220796

wizzies i just went cold turkey on my prozac and have been having brief but frequent dizzy spells that shake up my head and sometimes feet and hands. i was only on 20mg and i think the worst is gone should i see a doctor? will this cause any permanant damage?

 No.220832

>>220344
It's very suspicious that the statement "they (the medication) work for me" stands for itself. You just feel better? How does it change your situation? I cannot even comprehend what that's supposed to be like. I guess for normalfag it's easy to measure the success. If they can do normalfag stuff like work, routine, relationship, friends, in their everyday life then the meds works. But if you don't have any of that then how am I supposed to know if the meds work? I guess the best they can do is make me forget that I care about other things than what I have right now. Or maybe I can consume more stuff without getting tired of it. Life's good and the fact that it's actually not will be forgotten if you take a pill. Great. Well maybe it's still better. What is there to lose.

 No.220834

The fundamental premise of ADs is just bonkers. First they reduce a complex condition like depression to some specific brain chemicals without any real empirical evidence, then they sell you a drug that messes with your brain chemistry in unpredictable ways causing all kinds of side-effects. The positive effects are indistinguishable from placebo and the popular advice is to try a bunch of them until they work, or more correctly until you convince yourself that they work.

If you really need something to get you through the day, try weed or other actually cool drugs that work as intended. The nature of depression is based on a lot of factors, but there are many drugs that can get rid of negative feelings or lack of energy temporarily (but your doctor will never prescribe them).

 No.220835

>>220832
You're fundamentally right that the easiest way to measure success is by objective criteria, for me I used the ability to complete a todo list of chores I had to do every day. I cycle between dysfunctional depression and better moods, so for many years I couldn't do a single item on the todo list. Now I cycle between it taking me 6-12 hours to do the items, or failing, when I'm depressed and being in normal being able to do them in 2 hours.

For people with more normal lives who have a superstructure around them of friends, work, family, routine, they have many more external indicators that something is wrong. If they suddenly can't do what they were doing, and then can do it again, the pills have worked. These things will also exert pressure on them to check if they're getting better, friends and family will continue to try and see if they're better. Considering a lot of people develop depression and haven't had it for most of their lives such things allow them to catch it early and easily see if the pills are having an effect, true.

There is a level of focus on internal experience though. Depression ultimately creates a focus on things which normal people don't focus on. When you're depressed moving across the room to start a task is a complicated thing : trying to access missing motivational energy, your body not responding, your internal language not connecting to anything, concepts not making sense, having to move your body limb by limb. I never had success with medication to be clear; but when I lift out of depression all of that disappears. You just intend to do a task, your body responds, and you do it; it's so much simpler that everything just happens and it's different. Even if you have to remind yourself why you're doing something when you don't want to do it, your mind responds to the reminder and your body just responds to the intention. How could that be explained to someone who is still experiencing it as a broken down mix of unresponsive internal factors? It becomes like magic, invisible to oneself, even if you still have to apply psychological tools to do something you don't want to.

Even if you don't have external measures your internal experience can relate to semi-measurable factors like the nature of doing a task. For me personally I have to actually remind myself some experiences exist when my mood raises, I have to remind myself that you can just breath and pay attention while doing something and enjoy it. You can just pass through time doing a task and conscious awareness isn't just suffering unlike depression, and afterwards you can feel a sense of reward or pride. That disappears during depression, it doesn't even make sense - entire areas of human experience just disappear. You can't explain it. I can't explain it to myself in those states, I read my own writing and don't understand it. I didn't really believe it until a few years ago.

Furthermore that's what make objective measures useful. You can't just compare a depressed state to a normal state from memory, you can use semi-measurable factors but you can't really compare them as experience. I have a lot of stuff written down about the differences and I just can't access them from memory. I however experience quite bad cognitive deficits during depression.

This can be seen in quite a pessimistic fashion outlining how much depression takes, but hopefully it helps you comprehend a little. Fundamentally I believe depression is an altered state of consciousness that requires its own language to describe and relate to. As I say I haven't had success with prescription medication, as outlined in >>219503, but I believe people when they say certain meds just changed everything "night and day" and it may be possible for some people. Sorry for the long post I hope it helped you or someone.

 No.220850

I took SSRIs for 10 years. They made me fat, lazy and less ambitious. I'm pretty sure they're the reason I dropped out of college, I couldn't get myself to do anything and I didn't really feel like doing anything anyway.

 No.220851

>>220796
It is ideal that you reduce the dose gradually so that you don't get more lasting side effects, but yeah, you do get those zaps when you quit on it along with some other uncomfortable sensations. For me the general unpleasantness lasted for several weeks. Either way, I don't think anything permanent will happen, but it can last for a long time if you don't do it properly.

 No.220853

>>220834
This post is absolutely correct. I find it really odd that antidepressants are prescribed on such different premises compared to how you treat virtually any disease. You don't have to test anything, you don't have to actually have anything, you could just go to the appointment on a bad day and the doctor can deduce whatever the fuck he wants from your words to start drugging you. They don't even have to know what you have. Usually they'll just come up with something broad/generic on the fly to justify it. It's fucking bullshit.

I took antidepressants for a decade, and they NEVER made anhedonia better. If anything, they made it worse. The only difference is that you're too busy being a zombie to care about it. All this time, it was just my parents and the doc insisting I was better, even though I didn't really feel any better at all. In fact, my life got much, much worse, but everyone just attributed it to mental illness rather than the medication. Psychotherapy helped me much more than ADs ever did.

 No.220889

I took antidepressants back in 2006, opened up sexual negative stuff to a guy I know from high school, some hacker messed with me. He(most hackers are male) disseed my 3 Windows XP computers. I was held for 3 months in a mental hospital. Now I have a pension at age 33 yr. Use antivirus or use Linux

 No.220891

It was a Finnish mental hospital, I was renting from my mother and got only 50€ in housing support, when I got my pension in 2010 the rent support was increased to 600 €

 No.220892

>>220889
>Now I have a pension at age 33 yr
What is your pension for, wizard? Depression?

 No.220893

(I have a pension at 33 yr)
Schizophrenia. I tried to study with study support, but that was only around 400 €/month since I was renting an apartment from a parent. I also took more advanced math + physics than minimum (I had to apply for that). Only passed one course of the more difficult physics.

 No.220894

Here is a pro-tip for people in Finland. If you claim your computer is hacked that is enough reason to say you a delusional or psychotic. There is nobody who is going to run anti-virus on your computer and submit a report to a court. Even if you have complained about 3 month forced treatment to a Finnish administrative court. It took 2.5 months of mental hospital torture before a judge ruled that they had the right to hold me. I can't remember if the court reached a decision in 2006 or 2007. I was never taken to see a judge or talked to a lawyer. I talked to a somebody at the ward, but the question was for things like: do you have special powers? I was like I am really good at math. I also said I was spied on with malware on my computer. In 2005 I got the highest grade in math (maximum level) from Finnish national examination.

 No.220895

At age 7 they diagnosed me with learning disability + been logically gifted. They let me study in a local school, despite of the disability. At age 20 yr, they declared me mentally ill.

 No.220896

>>220893
>>220894
Interesting, thanks. Do you think you'll ever try to go back to school?

 No.220899

Has anyone here tried any MAOIs like Parnate or Nardil? I'm considering ordering some from Indiamart but I'm not sure if they will work.

 No.220923

I keep reading that antidepressants reduce your ability to feel either happy or sad… I ALREADY feel nothing at all! Except rage and numbness. How is that supposed to help? I got on Trintellix and all it gave me is stomach ache and anxiety attacks! Wtf?

 No.220924

>>219431
Sounds like my brain secretes this 24/7 except the sleep thing

 No.220927

gl agonizing receptors when theres none left

 No.221034

I was on Zoloft for a number of years. It would make me nauseous in the morning and cause me to eat more than I should. It made me so apathetic that I almost went through with suicide. I recently tried Lexapro for a month only this time it caused me to sleepwalk a lot. I still found myself gorging on junkfood again and not caring about anything. It's like they give you these pills in order to become the perfect consumerist worker drone. Also my dick stop working as well as it should.

 No.221051

>>221034
Yes, I've been through countless antidepressants, and all they did to me (aside from the various side-effects) was to make me not care about anything. I'm not exactly sure how that is supposed to help people since it also means you won't actually feel compelled to do anything to change your life. The worst thing is that I complained about not being motivated to do things over many, many years to various psychiatrists and absolutely none of them even considered finding me an alternative to antidepressants, at best they just switched me to a different one that ended up doing the same.

 No.221053

>>221051
Have you ever had Methylphenidate? It's what I want to try but where I live it's very hard to get a prescription.

 No.221060

>>221053
Not OP but I have. It’s good but I built a tolerance quickly.

 No.221061

>>221053
I'm quoted anon, but I haven't had that one in particular. They mostly prescribed SSRIs and SNRIs. I've wanted to try it though, not sure how I'll react.

 No.221068

>>221053
Not op. I've tried Adderall, focalin, Ritalin, Vyvanse, modafinil, daytrana, concerts, etc

I have ADHD and these pills plague me with extreme emotional blunting while I'm up on them. 1/5 patients have this side effect unfortunately. My friends remark how dull I am when on them, they destroy my confidence, kill my appetite, and make everything in my life joyless. Certain things I engage with that trigger a dopamine reward circuit, for instance getting a multikill in a competitive video game, feel completely numb on stimulants.

It's like I'm in some weird version of hell when I'm on them. I'm better at functioning in every way, and I can actually keep my life together. I can focus my head long enough to learn from uni textbooks, I can sit down long enough to think through complex problems, I can make the correct choice faster in pressured scenarios. It's like my brain is finally realizing it's potential. But I can't enjoy any of it. In fact, I am so detached that I genuinely don't give a shit whether I'm alive or not. Not that I wish to die, but rather that I am so uninvested in my life that I might as well keep going forward because I couldn't give enough of a shit to stop what I'm already in the middle of doing. It's like I have no opinion were you to ask me if my existence was worth living.

At least when I'm off them I want to die, you know? At least I want something.

 No.221069

>>221068
Very interesting. Too bad it's not only the
>I'm better at functioning in every way, and I can actually keep my life together.
part.

 No.221085

>>221069
well he's getting that much out of it. adderall doesn't solve my lack of cognitive ability, so I just focus on reading which isn't productive, but I feel worse off it. I smoked cigs when I was younger and adderall basically just replaced it, but my fundamental slowbrain doesn't change.

 No.221467

I've recently started my third anti-depressant, the last two were SSRIs, this one is wellbutrin.
So far, same experience as the SSRIs. Nothing changes whatsoever, no side effects, no mood differences, no nothing. I started wellbutrin over a week ago so I still have a couple of weeks for it to kick in fully, but I don't even have any side effects. I truly believe these are all sugar pills and rely on placebo or something to make them work.

 No.221488

>>221467
This is pretty much my experience as well. I've been on a little over half a dozen antidepressants, SSRIs, atypical SSRIs, NDRIs, MAOIs, fucking everything. Never once felt an actual difference on any of them.
They're not complete sugar pills, because the dick-numbing side effect of SSRIs way too often for the pill to be inert. It happens to over 50% of people taking the drug even if you don't tell them SSRIs fuck with libido.

My view is that they do occasionally work, but they're very unreliable and we don't understand in the slightest what, if anything, is going to work for any particular person. That's why the prescription cycle is just endlessly trying random shit until maybe something works.
Depression treatment is not scientific medicine yet, all we know is that we have a bunch of pills that are occasionally helpful and if you try enough of them you might eventually get lucky.

 No.224406

>>218735
They make me less ocd and anxious but they also numb you and you get sexual dyfunction

I'm actually getting of them atm, hope i don't keep having anxiety and intrusive thoughts
If it returns i'll talk to my doctor for anxiety meds that aren't ssri's

 No.224408

>>221488
>>221467
Yes they have random side-effects, which lets people and doctors 'break the blind' in scientific tests. As in, people can tell it isnt a placebo since it has some side effect. This leads to a slight increase in the placebo effect. Also, most 'depressed' people start taking the drug during an especially bad episode, so they are generally going to be likely to start to feel better after making the mental leap that they really want to improve. AT BEST, studies show a nearly insignificant improvement with SSRIs, so it is all explainied by phenomena such as these. Additionally, there is evidence that studies demonstrating poor effectiveness are suppressed or not published

 No.224418

File: 1595099509399.png (150.05 KB, 1698x1058, 849:529, Screen Shot 2020-07-05 at ….png) ImgOps iqdb

>>219024
Hey it's the same wizard from this post, I posted it months ago and started taking prozac and buspar together. I don't feel like a zombie like people are saying, they actually help a a lot. My intrusive thoughts are at an all time low. I'm enjoying life a bit more, praying and such helps too. This stuff makes me feel okay being alone. Which is a GREAT side effect.
>>219043
>>219316
These antidepressants didn't do a thing ya'll said.

 No.224576

>>224418
Wait, one second mang.

I honestly believe antidepressents are shit too, like prolly everyone in this thread, but what you're taking is anti anxiety medication "buspar" afaik. I haven't tried it myself yet and have high hopes, does it do something for you at all or are you really sure its the prozac?

 No.224579

>>224418
Prozac, the very first AD for mass markets? And it works a treat? Why would they create more then?

 No.224607

>>219428
I enjoyed it the first few days I used it but after that it began to send me into a depressive spiral that lasted about a month after I stopped using it. Be careful with it.

 No.224608

>>224576
the last two psychiatists I had really like buspar. That last one even more so, though taking folic acid vitamins have the same effect and are a good supplement to Prozac. this is of course what they tell me and I don't care to know the difference. Buspar is a pain though because I have to take it twice a day, but I am less likely to die of an overdose like I would with prozac

 No.224610

>>224608
This is very interesting to read. Do you only suffer from depression or is there some generalized anxiety in you as well? I have an appointment in a couple of weeks and I need to leave the house for that, maybe I'll get my doc to prescribe me that… Benzos scare the shit out of me as I used to have a problem with alc (multiple bottles of vodka per week) and benzos are addictive.

 No.224613

>>218735
I take snri's i stopped taking them and i feel more tired and lethargic
Snri's give you a bit of adrenaline so yea

 No.224615

Take SSRI right now for about two weeks. I'm starting to miss my emotions, even the bad ones. My thoughts and interests are kind of inhibited, I don't care about anything, neither the good nor the bad things. On the other hand I don't remember that life was better before. I was suicidal every day, now I don't care if a suicidal thought pops up, it's like I have no emotional connection to the thought. I just want out of here. I'm pretty sure that I must have died a few years ago in my early twenties and am going through hell ever since. And it doesn't even matter.

 No.224909

>>224615
which SSRI? And honestly, I've never felt a change on all the ones I've tried. Just how in the world does that do that to you and some many others, but they supposedly work on a lot of people, and there are even people like me where they do absolutely nothing. This is one of the dumbest things in the world. If you have a cut, you bandage it and it stops bleeding, works 100% of the time (unless you have some super rare disease or something) why the heck are these things so wishy washy in it's use, and how can these shrinks keep pushing this garbage that have a very weak foundation

 No.225062

File: 1595796215716.jpg (127.04 KB, 1200x900, 4:3, 1561487605239.jpg) ImgOps iqdb

I take antipsychotics i've been taking them for a long time and i feel my brain cells are dying off
i'm not as articulate and i fail to comprehendcertain certain things, sucks to be psychotic sucks to medicated what a way to live

 No.225063

>>225062
what makes you psychotic compared to the average person?

 No.225088

>>225063
in various ways odd thinking mainly, i suffer from anxiety and paranoia but it fluctuates
I'm very suspicious, i used to get psychotic just walking down the street and i always think people are out to get me etc

I do stupid and weird things and i become reclusive and almost catatonic, where i literally just sit in my room all day playing video games

 No.225093

>>225088
is it like zyprexa or whatever? clinicians have attempted to feed it to me in the past and i flat-out denied them

 No.225097

>>225093
yes zyprexia and believe me i denied and denied for allot of reasons but after failing to keep a job and socialize,
being hopitalized a few times and experiencing lot's of distress i finally gave in,
if i had taken them from the start i could've avoided allot of troubled times and years of pain

actually taking them isn't exatly the best either

 No.225272

To be perfectly honest, as someone who started down that road at age 14, psychiatry is my #1 life regret. I wish I had nothing to do with shrinks.

 No.225273

>>225272
So half the people say that meds ruined their life the other half say that meds saved their life, who do i listen to??

 No.225275

>>225273
Maybe decide something for yourself for once in your wretched life.

 No.225378

>>225273
I suppose it depends on the circumstances. Are you on the edge of suicide? Do you think you won't be able to fix yourself any other way? Then it may be worth a try.

In the beginning, I think that a lot of my problems could've been handled back then without it if I had parents that didn't have shit for brains.

 No.225381

>>225275
Are you talking to me, or to you?

 No.225385

>>225378
I tried to go as long as I could without them. I really tried. I went through the worst kind of shit. Now I take them and what? The pain is different, it's still pain. I think I am closer to suicide than without them but yet, the suffering does not feel as severe as before. It is just that the hopelessness is more clear to me than before. Before I alway thought that it is WORTH to live foe something even if it is schizo tier delusion which it probably was. Now? There is no delusion left. All there is left is neutral evaluation of what is going on. Which is nothing. And there will nothing change. My inner mind dialogues have stopped, I have no more interests. Strangely enough, this new kind of pain feels detached from myself and I want the immediate pain back.

 No.225392

>>225275
Imagine actually being able to make decisions for yourself or to post in such an offhandedly forceful way.

 No.225400

Took one 20mg citalopram and felt like I was dying.

Heightened anxiety, heightened suicidal thoughts, sweating, inability to sleep. Horrific stuff, all power to anyone on them.

 No.225524

I was on citalopram since father blackmailed me 9 years ago by weaponizing my suicide ideation as a way to try to get me locked up. The psychiatrist was next to useless and I got citalopram and it didn't really do much. My biggest mistake though was I didn't know that a potential side effect of sudden discontinuation was mania and I had never been manic in my life before so I felt super energetic all the time and I thought it was like my head had finally cleared up when it hadn't. I had all these grand ambitions but didn't scrutinize them properly. It was like when Peter Park gets venom and then makes an ass out of himself and I've always been socially awkward and unconfident and I didn't realize how stupid I had been until I came down from it and it was the worst.

 No.225537

>>225524
Jokes on you, i've always been a socially awkward maniac :))

 No.225746

>>219503
Been using 80mg atomoxetine for 3 months now and don't feel a thing, not even basic appetite suppressant like >>220206 seemed to experience. In date non-generics as well. It really is random.

 No.225755

>>225400
Wtf, not normal at all, you must have some allergy

 No.225873

>>219299
Yeah, they work for people who are depressed for no reason. But the way I see it, there's 3 types of depression:

1. Chemical imbalance/misaligned emotions:
Antidepressants work here. This is just your brain not aligning with reality. This is the most normie tier depression and the one that normalfags will immediately assume that you have when you're depressed "without reason."

2. Life event depression.
When someone dies or there's a tragic accident, or something like that. This shouldn't even be called depression, it's just a normal sad reaction. Some psychologists are actually moving against classifying these normal reactions as depression. Antidepressants will work for this to an extent, but it's stupid to prescribe them for a normal reaction unless it lasts too long.

3. Omega-depression/Abyssal Depression/Black Depression.
Whatever you want to call it, this is what most wizards have. This is the black well of utter despair. There's still degrees of this. I spent 14~ years, from 11 to 25, basically at this level. This is the kind of depression that results from severe bullying from a young age, horrible (and/or repeated) childhood trauma, being screamed at regular basis. Or being utterly neglected and treated like trash.
Zero self worth.
Constant suicide ideation.
No sense of 'being human'/humanity.
Normals cannot understand this. They CANNOT understand this level of depression, just like a lot of wizards (including me) can't understand what it is like to be totally content, fulfilled, and living a "full" life.
I spent years, most of my late teens and 20s begging for help, telling people that I didn't feel like a human. Telling psychologists. They didn't get it. They thought I was just another angsty teen going through a phase. Telling them that I didn't feel human was just met with "of course you're human." They just totally dismiss it because they cannot understand.

Anti-depressants don't work with this type either, or if they do, it's only in conjunction with INTENSIVE therapy.

 No.225874

>>221467
Well, it's been about 2 months. I had to get the dosage higher and that seemed to do something.
I was a lot more depressed than normal for about a week sometime into it, but then it started 'working'. During the day, I notice myself being in a good mood, but that's just the chemicals. Sooner or later during that good mood, I am reminded of my position in life and I start having a lot of suicidal thoughts. This has been happening almost everyday now.
Honestly, a lot of it probably has to do with the fact that I have no friends nor anyone to talk to. For a long time I guess I could be considered 'schizoid', but I'm starting to see that it's just cope. We are biologically driven to socialize but also survive, so we cope to ignore it.
I'll probably stop taking them when I run out, mostly because of the cost (the 'good' mood isn't worth the price tag). Seeing how others said, this stuff only works for chemical imbalances, and I can definitely see it working in those cases. The shrink told me that was what I have, but looking back over my life and how it is now, I can't say it's the case. Anyone would be depressed in my shoes.

So, I have autism. I got diagnosed during elementary school. I had friends then, but I started to be myself more often around age 10. I started 4th grade late, so I missed the whole getting to know everyone thing (which I imagine is a big problem for most people). Due to the difficulty of autism and kids getting older, I found it much harder to make any friends. Old friends just kind of faded away during 5th grade. My autistic habits were becoming more apparent to my peers (I assume it wasn't a problem in years earlier than that due to how kids don't understand people that much). I had a meltdown the day middle school started, and my mother enabling (she pities me) me too much, she managed for me to get pulled out of school and have a tutor provided by the school district to teach me an hour a day. I hardly even went to the tutor. During this time and up until junior year, I became a hikikomori. The few times I did leave the house I would make sure to keep my eyesight my shoes and never say a word. When I was around 16, it just kind of stopped. I still don't have much a clue how I overcame it. But I was mistaken thinking it would have been that easy. My peers are even more off put by me and it doesn't help that my interests aren't popular. I can now interact just fine for things that are not socially related (work stuff, calling businesses on the phone, ordering food, etc.). Rarely, I can socialize a bit with a single person, but never in groups. And if I was talking to someone it has to be in a situation where eye-contact isn't convenient (working, in a car). Otherwise they will immediately notice that my gaze is never directed at them, and I imagine it would be uncomfortable for them to talk to someone who doesn't even look in their direction. I was never bullied, most people seemed to be nice, it's just nobody wants to be friends with the weird kid, so rather I was neglected. I imagine that some people wish I wasn't there (where ever that may be) since they do not know how to interact with people that aren't 'normies'.
Nowadays, I just sit here at the computer desk all day (unless I work) just like most of my life. As >>225873 points out with not feeling human, I would say I feel the same. Rather, I have always saw it that I was some body-less entity that observes the world through a small scope with no way of interacting with it. Like watching a movie, you can only see how things play out and cannot do anything to alter the events in it.
>"of course you're human."
Maybe I'm reading this wrong, but it seems like you are saying they are using human in a literal sense. And I assume you mean human in an abstract way, same as humanity.
From I wrote, I think to be able to feel human is to participate in 'society' (really just doing something that makes an impact on someone else). We are social creatures and any thoughts of suicide are just our ways avoiding the pain of not fulfilling our programming. I feel as if this is something that cannot be changed. As you said, a wizard life vs a normal life, they are mutually exclusive and one man can never have had been through both of these lifestyles in a single life.

I tried most of the time in social situations and I will continue to do so and try to get better, learn, and analyze how things go. I may seem like a bundle of hopelessness, but that's really just depression. I'm not sure how you guys feel about it, but I believe it's not who we really are, but it does damage us and tries to remove ourselves. I don't know about how you guys will do in the future, but for me, I'll keep trying and see how things play out. Maybe I will shoot myself in the head a few years down, maybe not.
Thanks for reading my pity blog, night.

 No.225891

Are antidepressants helpful for severe anxiety, especially for disabling panic attacks ?

 No.225892

>>225891
not really, you need benzos for that

 No.225912

>>225893
The same mentality that makes humans thin they can control the environment is the same one that makes people think they can control their brain chemistry.

 No.225927

My overall experience when it comes to drugs is that the only ones that actually work are seriously addictive and potentially life ruining.

But when they do work, you'll fucking know about it.

 No.225933

>>225927
Yeah, alcohol, marijuana, and others are probably fairly healthy in moderation, but asking the uninhibited brain to effectively moderate your behavior is a different story.

 No.225934

>>225933
- hence the "Addictive" qualities of said drugs

 No.225936

>>225927
Vice is incredibly destructive; even the ancient greeks remarked on this.

 No.225987

>>225874

This is interesting as it's a bit similar.Yeah to be honest, I had always been treated as normal by adults except there were some giveaways that became more pronounced as I got older. I hated being in school all day and found it hard to handle and the only really off thing that was observable by adults was my handwriting and temper tantrums over minor things. With kids they could tell I was kind of an oddball and sometimes they'd screw around with me and I'd snap. I didn't really realize that mental experience was totally different from theirs since they seemed like totally at peace with daily life. Like even if they were dumb and ugly, it didn't bother most of the kids much. For me, pretty much any inadequacy I had was too noticeable to me and i just would want to be home surfing the web, playing video games, and watching tv/reading up on history. I was seen as being smart even though I fell short when other kids tried and was just clumsily and uncoordinated so made an ass out of myself in PE, so it was the usual nerd stereotype except I'd always get shown up by the sociable nerdy people. The eye contact is always nerve-wracking to me and it feels like I don't actually have control over what face is projecting since people sometimes are like "why are you looking at me like" or they make a scowly face and i think it's partially due to my thoughts resulting in facial expressions and being unable to maintain a neutral outward demeanor.

My dad saw it as just depression/being an angsty teenager when I'd start to get despondent and complain and I was way too open with my suicide ideation.

I didn't realize these all fit severe learning disabilities and that was the reason I was always feeling so upset and tired. The psychs were patronizing and unhelpful. My dad was a delusional loser who believed in self-help books like think and grow rich and all sorts of crap and then he started parroting the chemical imbalance line.

>>225537

Not really my point there. I've always been socially awkward, but being manic means you don't feel any inhibition so you act like you can do anything. You get the energy levels of someone who is a go getter for a period of a few months, but you aren't actually better at anything than before, so it leads to a false confidence and fucking up in big ways. My inhibition usually limited the damage done.

 No.226067

>>225927
>>225933
>>225934
My personal experience is that addiction is impossible for me. I've taken plenty of opiates, benzos etc but ever felt like I wasn't in complete, comfortable control of my usage. I think addiction is far exaggerated by propaganda and that instills the fear like what you experience.

As long as you're not a retard, you can just taper off slowly without withdrawal effects, even if it's heroin.

Remember how abysmally stupid normalfags are

 No.226218

Has anyone here tried phenibut? I bought something in hopes of anxiety relief. It builds up tolerance fast but as I only go out like once in a week I solely want to use it for that.

 No.226221

I love how I have no empathy and no emotions now. Is this life even worth living?

 No.226223

>>226221
You sound like a succubus

 No.226224

>>226223
post of the year.

 No.226286

>>226067
Im sorry but I have to call bullshit on what u said about addiction. I've personally known people both addicted to heroin and benzos. You can definitely develop a physical addiction to benzos and that means that you will have physical withdrawal symptoms. You either took baby doses or you never took benzos for a long enough period of time for ur body to develop an addiction, you can't be resistant to physical addiction.

Same with heroin which you played down by typing "as long as you are not a retard", it's not that easy, why don't you try getting on heroin and then getting "slowly off" it yourself, it's not as easy as you claim it is from your high horse and it certainly has nothing to do with normalfags whatsoever.

You are truly ignorant for talking like that when our don't even know the facts since you obviously didn't take anything for a long enough period to develop and actual physical addiction, so I suggest you educate yourself before you post stuff like that.

 No.226376

>>226286
I absolutely had physical symptoms. I considered that to be physical dependence. I tapered off and quit whenever I wanted. I am talking about the psychological issues people have where they say they want to quit and it's ruining their lives but for some reason they keep taking it as if 'against their will'

 No.226535

>>226223
SSRIs do reduce empathy and millions of people are on them. It actually makes a lot of sense given the state of the world

 No.226572

File: 1597495502087.jpg (15.29 KB, 234x215, 234:215, instincts.jpg) ImgOps iqdb

>>225874
Yeah, that's what I was getting at. If I recall correctly my actual words were "I'm not a functional human being."
Which, I wasn't. I'm still not. I've had 1 job my entire life and it lasted 6 months. Nobody hires an early highschool dropout with nothing on his resume. At least back then there was a chance for things to change. The change just didn't happen.

>>226535
I'm thinking that SSRIs + mass media + birth control is what has turned most succubi into succubi in the first place.

 No.226586

>>225874
I never get how mentally broken persons manage to write such long coherent posts. To me it seems like you just channel your energies into things that stop you from achieving what you complain about.

 No.226647

>>226586
It's easier to write when it's about your problems. The level of ability for those posts is much lower than what is needed for doing actually productive things.

 No.226718

>>226586
You're basically asking "How can an articulate person be mentally fucked up?"
Fucking easily. Having a talent doesn't stop you from being broken.

 No.226975

Recently bought some diphenhydramine against insomnia, and noticed that it seems to give me a more positive mood the next day.
I am not quite sure yet, but in the past few years i had exactly 2 days where i didn't feel like a decaying zombie with no emotion except for dull anger and annoyance at everything, and both of these were after taking DPH.
It seems to increase my (basically non-existant) emotional response to things i would find pleasant in the past (immersion in video games, empathy towards characters, etc) and kind of made me feel fine with just existing.
It made me extremely lethargic however, which i don't give fuck about.. it's a bonus if anything.
I guess it is plausible, since DPH is a sertonin reuptake inhibitor.
It sends you into delirium when OD though and is suspected to increase risk of dementia, which kinda worries me, but it makes me believe stuff like SSRIs might actually work.

 No.226977

>>226975
if you like diphenhydramine you should try some older antidepressants like doxepin, they are basically longer lasting more powerful versions of dph, I like them a lot more than newer antidepressants, they're more effective at treating anxiety imo

 No.226980

>>226975
Abusing diphenhydramine has given me extremely bad night terrors and insomnia. Just be careful

 No.226982

>>226586
I don't necessarily channel my energy in things that prevent me from fixing my situation. I channel it into things I like. Like I said, I'm autistic and so I have a predisposition to avoid social things and focus on things.
My post was written in a fit of depression that I have every once in awhile. Most of the time it's not that bad. But that could just be because my thoughts are hardly about 'me'. They say autism is a self-centered disorder, but it's self-centered in terms of interest, not character like narcissism. I do usually get depressed when I am reminded of myself, mostly from my position in this world. I go about my days off not uttering a word, and even at work I don't socialize. Why don't I fix that? I don't want to socialize with my co-workers, largely from the huge gap in interests, but I do want to socialize. I'm a beggar and a chooser. I imagine many people would find nothing wrong with that when it comes to friendships, as long as they're not too uptight on their standards, which I don't believe I am. And even all that, they never take an initiative to speak to me, even after having brief conversations with me. I take that as them not liking me (but not dislike).
These feelings of rejection only ever come to me when I'm surrounded by others socializing, which I imagine is a common thing amongst people like us. Lonely only around others type of thing. And going off that, I always feel complete when I am 100% alone physically. I don't feel any pressure to suppress myself. It's funny, since it's a popular idea to express yourself without care about others judging, but the second you do (or at least I do) is the second they say "not like that".
School starts up in a few more weeks and hopefully I can make some friends then, but from previous failed attempts, I don't have high hopes. But it'll will be what it will.

 No.227004

>>226982
Okay, well your post then suggests, as you are able to hold a job and have hopes of making friends, that you are not mentally broken as I had suggested in my post and that as you said you wrote your previous post in a short term depressive state. Your high functioning autism seems like a decent payoff for me, though still I'm sure or know of the struggles that come with it. However, best of luck for your future plans. There is no good in becoming a wizard in a given up state. I also had hopes once, and I still must have them, but they're gett
getting thinner and it's hard to have emotional access to them.

 No.227049

Not exactly an antidepressant but I got prescribed pregabalin and it feels like it cured my depression and lowered my social anxiety level. Can I take it long-term or will it stop working after some time?

 No.227053

>>227049
What I've read suggests you stop after some time. I heard it zombifies people, druggies use it during withdrawal
Can you share some more experiences

 No.227064

>>227049
I was prescribed that for a while too, it definitely gets rid of anxiety but for me it made me not care about literally anything, probably like a zombie >>227053 , and I didn't like that, swapped back to benzos as needed, much better

 No.227437

Got babby's first Helex, 0.25mg daily and I can pop them in greater quantities too.
It's standard fare and every normie seems to take them. How do wizards rate this drug?

 No.227438

>>227437
sorry it's alprazolam in english

 No.227440

>>227437
>>227438
I tried xanax before and did not enjoy it. Made me feel kind of empty like a zombie.
Be careful for benzodiazepine withdrawal. If you take it everyday you will eventually grow dependent.
I think it might make more sense to save it for when you have those bad days. Mood swings, panic attacks, etc. Don't just pop it daily if you feel fine, regardless of what the doctor says.

 No.227445

>>227440
I'm already a bit of a zombie so it should be allright.
>I think it might make more sense to save it for when you have those bad days. Mood swings, panic attacks, etc. Don't just pop it daily if you feel fine, regardless of what the doctor says.
I see, thanks for the advice

 No.227447

>>227440
I enjoy diazepam a lot. But if I take it regularly i start to dislike it

>I think it might make more sense to save it for when you have those bad days. Mood swings, panic attacks, etc. Don't just pop it daily if you feel fine, regardless of what the doctor says.

strongly agree

 No.227846

>>227437
I feel exactly the same, only a bit less relaxed on alprazolam
What drugs work against anhedonia? What drugs can give you the will to do something?

 No.227864

>>227846
>What drugs work against anhedonia?
marijuana, opiates

>What drugs can give you the will to do something?

modafinil, ritalin, stimulants

 No.227973

I'm on Clonazepam now
I probably does something I don't care
share stories please I want to know how it is

 No.228012

>>227973
Another fucking joke
Slept 16 hours on it

 No.228013

>>228012
I will keep taking it because they say it can get worse before it gets better

 No.228019

>>227864

Asked my shrink about stims, but she couldn't prescribe it to me becuase I need an ADHD diagnosis.

 No.228041

>>228019
I hate that they blockade the stuff that actually works from us. They want us to suffer.

 No.228196

>>228019
I asked about stims and got antiepileptics, wtf?

 No.228199

If you can afford, buy Modafinil instead of stims. Research on the Internet how to get it,you don't need dark web for it. I tried the nootropic Adrafinil recently and this stuff works wonders. Modafinil is manufactured by actual pharma so it's quality is save and sound. I will buy it as it is supposed to be the improved version of adrafinil, which on the other hand is much cheaper. But it's a prodrug for modafinil so it takes much longer to metabolize and the effects arent's as good. On top of the health risk is even higher than for the medical modafinil generics although those are considered illegal while adrafinil is legal. Our legal system sucks.

 No.228202

>>228199
The effect it had on you is a little surprising, most people give pretty mediocre reviews of Modafinil (never heard of this other variant though, but Wikipedia claims it has similar effects on the body). You may just be an excellent responder to it, or placeboing yourself into results.
Modafinil doesn't do anything to focus or cognitive enhancement, all it really does is kill off the feeling of sleepiness. It works well when you need to force a very tired person into being able to stay alert, but if the reason you can't focus isn't sleep deprivation it's not a helpful drug.

>>227973
Clonazepam is a nice drug, IMO. It's milder and slower/longer-lasting than most benzos; it doesn't give you a noticeable "high" that feels really good unless you take a handful at once, it just turns your baseline state into relaxed and mellow and not constantly nervous.
The flip side of this is that it's INCREDIBLY easy to develop a serious addiction to it compared to the others. If you're an anxious person, it's so incredibly easy to get used to actually being calm, and once you do getting off is hell because as soon as you stop taking it you go right back to normal, multiplied by 10 because you're no longer numbed by habit and you're also dealing with craving the pills.
Also, like all benzos, it doesn't really fix or treat anything, it just makes you stop feeling bad for as long as you take the pills. It would be perfect if you could stay on it sustainably, but unfortunately that's not an option.

 No.228211

>>228202
I don't remember the last time I was not tired, it made me awake.

 No.228218

>>228202
Yeah, this is my experience too. Only thing that's ever worked for me is adderall but it's way too expensive to get the refills for me since the fucking place charges to send the refill order and I don't have health insurance. The problem is adderall can give nasty stomach issues and sometimes I just end up focused on stupid shit. It also makes me way too enthusiastic and optimistic which is bad because it causes delusional risk-taking.

 No.229371

>>218735
I don't know what's wrong with me at this point, I took amitryptiline when I hadn't slept for a day like a month ago. It was a small dose but ever since then I've been feeling literally braindead. I also heard that I failed my exam that day so I don't know if It's me being anxious and depressed or the drug

 No.229372

>>228202
>>228218
So I got Modafinil finally. I agree with you that the first reaction I wrote about Adrafinil was a false flag. Adrafinil only worked like two times after that and then only for maybe two hours. Modafinil on the other hand does exactly what you said it does, it decreases sleepiness. It does not make you euphoric or motivated. But for me personally this is a huge difference. I'm pretty sure that I suffered from narcolepsy for a long time now. I always wondered that other people seem like everyone takes cocaine every day because of how awake and alert they are while I am all sleepy and half dead. Now at least I feel somewhat like a decent human being.

 No.229373

Also, how much do anticholinergics affect cognitive function after long term use. I saw a study that it might cause alzheimer's in elderly but there are almost no studies when it comes to young people

 No.229771

For people with anxiety (GAD) does seroquel (quetiapine) help?

 No.229773

>>229771
at night, maybe. During the day it'll just make you drowsy af

 No.229774

>>229372
> It does not make you euphoric or motivated. But for me personally this is a huge difference.
Modafinil is neat. If I take it at the same time every morning, I'm ready to sleep at the perfect time at night. Better wake, better sleep, and very short-lived euphoric entrance. My first time with it was a little cracky with the euphoria, about 10 minutes, and then it was just a wakeful day.

YMMV, and be careful with it anon. Stick to regimen only, don't abuse even once for an all-nighter because something super interesting happened. :)

 No.229780

>>229773
Drowsy in a good way?

 No.229782

>>218735
I took jew pills and they made me feel violent. Like 5 different ones. Luvox was the worst one. Maybe good for some people. Terrible for me.

 No.229796

>>229373
Looking for an answer for this

 No.229965

Meds don't work
Meds don't work
meds don't work

Why normalfags worship therapists like the priest class of a religion, it makes no sense. I'm on 3 different pills for anxiety but my heart rate spikes like crazy and I can't sleep and I'm losing my goddamn mind. Anxious every day. FUCK AHH THIS IS ONE THOUSAND TIMES WORSE THAN DEPRESSION. IT'S LIKE I'M BACK IN HIGHSCHOOL IN THE MIDDLE OF A PRESENTATION BUT IT LASTS 6 MONTHS

 No.230691

I take Valium 5mg 2x daily, Gabapentin 100mg 4x daily & 7.5mg of Mirtazapine at night for sleep.
Mirtazapine and Effexor are the only ones I've been able to tolerate without feeling like an alien in my own head. Most SSRI's (especially Zoloft & Celexa) give me this clouded memory and sense of "apathetic surprise and confusion" type feelings. Its like being possessed. Others like Lexapro just made me extremely tired and might as well had been avolition.

 No.231490

>>229965
If anything anti-depressants only worked for my anxiety. They should seriously reduce it after one month if they don't you're pretty much fucked the other legal option is benzos which will definitely work, but they are very short term only.
Opiates should also work and the withdrawal won't literally kill you like with benzos, but normgroids made them illegal.
>>230691
Do not take Valium on a daily basis you're playing russian roulette with akathisia and seizures on the chambers.

 No.231495

15mg mirtazapine for depression
15mg olanzapine as an anti-psychotic
50mg promethazine for anxiety

i think i can get a benzo soon too as the promethazine does fuck all

 No.231504

>>231495
jesus dude, how are you even still awake on that combo

 No.231505

>>230691
>valium and gabapentin
your gaba receptors must be screwed, you shouldn't be taking those meds together

 No.231546

>>231504
i sleep for 12-14 hours a day

being neet means its easy to spend so much time in bed

 No.231595

I got prescribed Sertraline (Zoloft).

I'm on a pretty low dose. Sex drive is nonexistent. I agree with what others have said, they basically just numb me. I'm not a complete robot (probably because it's a low dose), but yeah. I never laugh like a maniac anymore, and I used to a lot. On the flip side, I don't get angry or sad now, just mildly annoyed or bored. I used to absolutely rage.

I can see why some people believe these things were created by the government to control the population, because fuck, I really do not give a shit anymore.

I didn't gain any weight, if anything they probably decreased my attitude.

I might stop taking them because I never really was too depressed in the first place, but I did suffer from anxiety. They have helped with that. Benzos are INFINITELY better at dealing with anxiety, only problem is they are addictive as fuck.

Nootropics are useless pseudoscientific trash, with the exception of modafinil. A good rule of thumb is if you can get it easily, it's probably shit.

I still believe that the best antidepressants and anxiolytics are the ones which pretty much end up being used as recreational drugs.

 No.231596

>>231595
>attitude
Appetite***

 No.231665

>>231505
He's gonna be in for a ride when some retarded doctor decides to cold turkey him. Kinda deserved when you're not willing to do one google search before deciding to take something daily.

 No.231839

>>227973
>>228012
>>228013
Clonazepam user here. Started when this was posted, still 0.5mg 2x daily, i don't feel anything different, it kinda calms you down but that's it

 No.231840

>>231839
I also forgot to take anything for 24hrs and felt nothing
Only the bottle on the table reminded me

Is it just me or does 0.5mg x2 Clonazepam do fuckall

 No.231844

>>231839
>>231840
I've been taking clonazepam for 5 years, it's the only thing that helps with my severe anxiety disorder, it totally depends on where I'm going though, the dose, and you shouldn't be taking it every day, for me 0.5mg is fine for anxiety at home, 1mg is fine for mild anxiety in crowds, but I need 2mg if I'm gonna interact with humans face-to-face like at school or work. The reason it's probably not doing anything is because you're not using it correctly, you don't take benzos every day, they are an as-needed medication, so when you get 60 0.5 clonazepams for the month you should have days off so you have extras when you need a higher dose for higher anxiety

 No.231847

>>231844
I have a baseline level of anxiety or whatever that is constant

 No.231848

>>231847
I do too but you just have to live with it or get on an anti-depressant, benzos aren't an every day drug, they lose effectiveness over time if taken excessively

 No.231867

>>231844
Nothing works on Acute anxiety. Been on 6 ssris for anxiety and I'm still dealing with it every day.

It's actually amazing how fucked I am from every direction. I feel like a caged animal thrashing around while being shocked by some sadistic scientist.

 No.233494

>>231867
What is your anxiety like? Are you a NEET?

 No.233565

>>218735
I take paxil but it makes me way to up, i want stability not a high lovely feeling i prefer the stabiility.
I would take benzodiazepines but my doctor won't prescribe them, some of you suggested trazodone i used to take Duloxetine which is a sort of pain ssri might go back on that

 No.233712

>>233494
>What is your anxiety like?

Imagine you have depression(you probably don't have to imagine). You feel depressed all the time. Now swap out that feeling of depression for anxiety. That's basically it.

 No.233733

>>233712
i'd swap deppresion for anxiety any day, literally deppression is a huge step up for me. When i was only feeling deppressed i could still contemplate and focus on things, anxiety just fucks you up and you can't even stand to be awake because every second is overwhelming stress and your own mind doesn't ever shut the fuck up

 No.234981

SSRIs were like sugar pills for me, no benefit no side effect. Mirtazapine was ok but benefits wore off after a while. MAOI (parnate) was the best I tried for the first few months I took. But I had to order online because the Doc refused to prescribe it as it's 'dangerous and newer medicines are better'. Became NEET and couldn't afford it any more, kratom and phenibut are a bit better anyway.

 No.234982

>>220899
This is from more than half a year ago, but I'd be weary of ordering from there… heard of people getting ripped off by scheming Pajeets. I ordered from goldpharma several times in 2019 and it was legit, but rather expensive (albeit nowhere near as expensive compared to domestic uk prices). Parnate works for a lot of people but the doses usually need to be 50mg+ more like 60-70mg. The standard 20mg or 30mg dose isn't effective for many. Look up psychotropical website. They also do nardil iirc.

You have to fill out an online form saying you have depression but it's fairly simple. I've talked to some even ordering pure powder from alibaba. One guy I spoke to online said his mate had ot tested and it came back as possibly some mdma substitute lel but apparently he got on with it.

For uk wiz good luck getting MAOI prescribed by the nhs. My debacle with the nhs concluded up with a 20 min meeting with a psychiatrist who refused to entertain any maoi talk and ended up saying if I want to kill myself it's up to me. He said a healthy lifestyle and you'll feel better in a week or two, what a cunt.

Your best bet is going to a private psychiatrist, there is a good one in UK if you research. From there he will write you a prescription and you can order from Canadian pharmacies. I am NEET now and rely on other (non anti-depressant) drugs.

 No.235036

>>225400
I had a similar reaction to Duloxetine, but add hot flashes, extreme diarrhea, and hallucinations. Only took them for two days and woke in the worst panic of my life and went to the ER. The hallucinations didn't stop for three days and the anxiety didn't slow down until the past few weeks. I took them around late October.

 No.235162

Anti-depressants help with my anxiety (Fluoxetine, meaning they stopped my panic attacks). Also took aripiprazole and benperidol. There were bad side effects like (painful) uncontrollable muscle cramps.

Find out what's truly bothering you and take genuine steps to correct it. Medicine won't do it for you

 No.235313

Was recently given Trintellix (vortioxetine) samples and it's my last hope, considering I've been on Lexapro, Prozac, Abilify, and Rexulti. The only medicine that has seemed to work was Abilify (aripiprazole) but the akithisia/restlessness was horrible, plus it was like 300 USD a week to take. I don't have the funds to see proper psychiatrist, and the therapists/psychologists I've seen are horrible.

 No.235393

>>225524
I had a similar experience with Seroquel which I was prescribed in my early 20s, it really made me kinda manic with no sense of self-awareness whatsoever and not having any honest people in my life didn't help either. I did so much cringy things in public because I thought I was finally released from my anxiety but instead I was just making a total clown out of myself everyday without caring about it. Reading your post brought up a lot of cringy memories.

 No.235416

>>218735
I've never tried antidepressants but IF they worked surely they would be the most addictive drug imaginable? A pill that makes your mood improve? Why would you ever stop taking such a thing?

 No.235432

>>235416
Euphoria and depression remission are completely different, if you get lucky and ADs work for you you won't feel euphoric, just calmer and more motivated. Antidepressants are not addicting or even euphoric, you don't see someone talking about Lexapro cravings. It's like how there are happy people and there are people high on drugs, while both are happy the one high on drugs is on another level of happiness, plus drug addicts have literally no executive function and become homeless.

 No.236990

>>235416
>>235432
They do cause euphoria. SSRIs are intensely addictive from a biological standpoint, getting off those things is similar to withdrawing from a very hard illicit drug.
There is a good reason to stay on them. I had to get off for unique reasons but in hindsight I wished I had stayed on. They are euphoric, they 100% eliminate ALL negative feedback, and they make you bold. I had people remark on how confident I looked when speaking publicly. Now if you can imagine a world where you never receive any negative feedback at all, then you might see how that would be a problem i.e. the law.
The drug also permanently changes your brain. Even though I've been off for a few years, I still never, ever cry. My brain has been rewired in a way that is inherently resistant to negative emotions. I get pissed and can feel a bit down, but never depressed, sad, or even lonely. It is a strange experience.
And because the ssri eliminates your emotions, in a way you lose the sense of time. I can remember things from the years I was on the drug but it does not feel like it actually happened.

 No.236993

I’ve been on Mirtazapine for a while now and all it seems to do is make me gain weight and sleep all day. Thinking of quitting and relying on just CBD and melatonin to help me at night instead.

 No.237002

>>236993
I've been on this for 3 years now it is a bitch to quit every time I stop it I'll stay up long periods of time get real manic can't sleep. Get off it if you can I'm rooting for you

 No.237009

>>237002
Thanks wiz. I’m going to try and ease off of them slowly, because like you say every time I’ve not taken it I’m up all night unable to sleep. Then I spend the whole day feeling like a zombie.

 No.237044

>>236990
Which SSRIs were you on, wiz? I took 225mg Venlafaxine for four months, but it wasn't that great. Still had bad moments, but maybe I was better than before. I am thinking of getting back on them.
>The drug also permanently changes your brain. Even though I've been off for a few years, I still never, ever cry. My brain has been rewired in a way that is inherently resistant to negative emotions. I get pissed and can feel a bit down, but never depressed, sad, or even lonely. It is a strange experience.
I experienced this on the drugs, but it stopped almost immediately after I quit. Maybe I wasn't on them long enough.

 No.237139

File: 1614926827716.gif (1.16 MB, 320x240, 4:3, TcOU4q.gif) ImgOps iqdb

Does anyone have experience with taking SSRIs in conjunction with anti-psychotics? If one is not experiencing positive symptoms of psychosis (hallucinations, delusions) is it advisable to take these? Help me doctor wizard I want to be normal I don't wanna grow man titties

 No.237140

>>237139
Why are you taking anti psychotics I assume your doctor just wants a easy way to manage your anxiety and they truly love prescribing antipsychotics because we become so dull and lifeless we cannot even kill ourselves.

There really is no reason to take APs unless you are schizophrenic in my experience even if you hallucinate and get psychotic it can be better than dealing with the side effects.

Stop trying to be normal

 No.237141

>>237140
Not a schizo. Apparently, after observing my behavior during my second visit with him he decided the APs were necessary. Don't want to be normal really I just need the anhedonia/disorganized thoughts to go away, but if side effects are as bad as you say then so be it

 No.237144

>need the anhedonia/disorganized thoughts to go away

take them AP's you'll be begging for this to return

 No.237148

>>237141
I am honestly amazed anyone would take AP's when they do not need them I can understand a low dose of seroquel to help you sleep and maybe help with anxiety but honestly I do not even want to take them.

Let me put it in perspective for you: I am someone that gets hallucinations which are distressing and psychotic but heavy AP's like abilify for example drain you so much that all you can do is sleep without thinking yet it is not in a good way not an escape you become such a shell of a person a literal zombie.

Psychiatrists just like to prescribe them for their tranquilizing effects.
My advice to you is give it a go but stop if you dislike the side effects and also you can get permeant side effects from AP's.
I am convinced that the people who get them for off label reasons like anxiety and depression and do not bother complaining or continue to take them are just really stupid non thinking normalfags.

 No.237150

File: 1614933782577.png (659.33 KB, 600x600, 1:1, monke.png) ImgOps iqdb

I did "self-medicate" in the past with some weeed and cough-cough-pills though…
Never took any mood pills. Am I lucky?..or am I missing on being high legally all the time?

 No.237151

>>237150
What do you mean by legally high do you mean using weed? I also self medicated with weed when younger but the truth of weed for managing mental illness as a form of COPE is that you build a tolerance and are left feeling exactly as you did beforey ou started using weed as no lasting changes are made.
I have noticed that DXM has helped elevate my mood a bit also but the best lasting changes I have had came from using psychedelics.

If you mean legal high by taking AP's you have no idea what AP is like and SSRI are shit also honestly just fuck that shit off espcially APs I suggest as doctor wizzie that you try to score some psycedelic drugs and luckily you can legally obtain material for making a DMT tea known as ayahusca which may really help you learn how to help yourself and change your view of the world.

 No.237152

>>237151
I have no idea how does it feel, that's why I asked.
I know weed is shite after a while, you build up tolerance and you DO get addicted, especially psychologically

 No.237153

>>237152
You get as addicted to weed as you do wizchan for example it is real addiction but unlessy ou are a weak willed faggot you will be fine and after a few days of no weed you no longer crave it.

Try get benzos if you want a legal high and mix them with alcohol.

 No.237154

>>218735
Take one step at a time. Read, meditate on your suffering, eat fresh unprocessed food, stay hydrated, get sunlight, be in nature, sleep in a healthy rythm. No amount of drugs can fix a wrong attitude towards your mind, life and body. No amount of drugs can fix a bad environment. Tighten every screw you are in control of before giving away your control to a turbo power tripping normalfag succubus.

 No.237155

>>237153
willingly taking benzos, after seeing what happend to Jordan Peterson? no thanks

 No.237157

>>237155
I forgot the point of his question was not getting trainwreck messed up to cope but help himself please disregard.

 No.237324

>>237155
You can find an anecdote like that for any activity or drug on earth

 No.237502

i started brintellix 4 days ago. i got it prescribed because i suffer from anxiety induced backpain. and i guess depression? idk never explicitly told the doc that but just described my symptoms (insomnia, hands constantly sweaty even tough i am home alone, loss of appetite, sadness) from day 2 onward i could feel the effect. this stuff is the best it really is a 'happy pill' haha. my life doesn't suck and i actually am on my way to become succesfull, but i just wanted to die still. it really does numb your feelings sorta, but the feelings were the things that get in the way anyway. i love being a zombie. i would say it is like being on a low dose of MDMA but you dont really feel any ups or downs, it's a pure high.

upsides
- good sleep
- penis power is fine, same as before
> no will to kill myself
> emotions stable
>appetite was at first heavily reduced but now it has normalized
> backpain has lessened (main reason i took this shit)
> statisfied with life
> i go to bed thinking about all the good stuff i will do tomorrow with a big smile on my face

downsides
> was nauseous for the first 2 days after taking it, day 1 even had heavy diarrhea
> a bit harder to coom but who cares i can still do it if i want to, i just don't feel the need to since i'm not looking for another dopamine hit. i am statisfied already

i would describe it as a cosntant post nut clarity

 No.237507

>>237148
>>237140
I did a fair bit of thinking as to whether or not to take them, so it's not like I didn't question my psych's decision. Anyway, to make a long story short I did as you suggested and I honestly wish I'd heeded your warnings. I don't know how they get away with prescribing these drugs. Only took it for three days and the withdrawal still fucked me up terribly

 No.237515

>>237502
Enjoy it while it lasts. Sounds too good to be true.

 No.237519

I started taking mirtazapine recently and my head feels weird as fuck, kind of like I am floating. Also feel constantly sleepy and it feels like my hearing has decreased?

 No.237520

>>237519
I was on this also for a while and it just made me have more hunger and feel sleepy all the time but worse also in a new way.

 No.237529

>>237515
i am enjoying these pills quite a lot. i can study consistently again. which i really need since i am in the medical field. i was also really scared of taking any meds for mental problems, but hey free will does not exist, so any mental problems do have a physiological cause. depression and anxiety are real and they are a 'chemical imbalance' in the brain sorta, but this has never truly been proven in a lab, since we can not test the neurotransmitter amount in your brain. but if this serotonin modulator is working so well for me for now, it really must mean i have some serotonin fuckery going on in my head. but serotonin does so much different shit that it would be hard to pinpoint exactly what is wrong. at least now that i am a zombie i can set aside my feelings and truly study this subject again.

 No.237530

>>237519
>>237520
I'm trying to get off of this. It was nice to get some sleep for once but its 10-plus hours a day, makes you eat like a hog at the slop trough, and that weird floaty feeling just makes me more psychotic. It's not as bad as other shit they prescribe but that's no excuse. Please get off of this and just try natural sleep remedies. Best regards, anonymage

 No.237532

>>237529
I took SSRIs two years ago for about 6 months and it had similar effects on me especially it made me less anxious and more trustful in people which is a huge deal. In retrospect it's scary how it made me naive and kind of turned me into one of those persons you see in some movies that are store workers and only say yes and smile like a retard. It also took away my pessimism. I started to think optimistic about life and so on. Now I know that must truly has changed my core personality. I am by heart a pessimist and at least a sceptical person regardless of depression, it's just the way I am. Taking that away from me is like ripping off my spirit. That's not worth it even for a more positive mood enhancement. I'd rather kill myself than become a mindlessly positive person. Still, those 6 months were a good time. I'd just say if I get that desperate again that I need to change who I am then next time I'll suicide instead of taking stuff like that again. Why live a life for which I need pills an industry produced designed to make people alive and profit from or to make them wageslaves again? That can't be a good life by definition.

 No.237586

>>237532
anon would you say the same thing to a diabetic or cancer patient that needs his medication to stay alive? meds are not the devil. mental illness is just such a new thing and we are still in the try it or die phase. we can damage our bones and walk in a cast, but we can't damage our brains and help to heal it with SOMETHING atleast?
>>237502 i am this poster
a week ago i would agree, but freewill doesn't exist, what's wrong with becoming a wagie? oh god i the pills are working i am becoming a normie

 No.237588

>>237532
I stopped taking those pills a year ago. I hate how they make me feel. Like I don't even give a fuck about anything. It's a scary feeling. You're right, it's not worth losing your sense of self in exchange for being indoctrinated into the wageslave regime. What kind of dystopia are we living in that people have to take pills now in order to not snap and go fucking crazy? Really makes you think.

 No.237590

>What kind of dystopia are we living in that people have to take pills now in order to not snap and go fucking crazy? Really makes you think.

This. Righteous anger is good and healthy fuck the medical industry and jewpills

 No.237593

>>237590
Those pills are designed to suppress your innermost feelings about the world around you. If you're angry or paranoid all the time, maybe there's a reason for that. Your brain is trying to tell you that something is not quite right. They're the real life equivalent of blue pills from the Matrix. I guess if a wizard wanted to plug himself back into the grid and function in society, then he would take them and deal with the side effects.

 No.237594

>>237593
>They're the real life equivalent of blue pills from the Matrix. I guess if a wizard wanted to plug himself back into the grid and function in society, then he would take them and deal with the side effects.

If this is what you want then yeah they will definitely plug you right back in. But like a poster in this thread said earlier, and I'm paraphrasing here; You act extremely naive and like some cartoon caricature of a human being. It's not worth the tradeoff, just deal with your issues and contiunally seek happiness or whatever it is you want in this life.

 No.237612

>>237594
You paraphrase me I think and personally I wouldn't want to tell anyone whether to take the pills or not. It's ultimately a decision one has to make for themselves. I remember how desperate I was before taking the drugs back then. It really seemed like the only and right decision. I'd say it helps me to have had the experience as I learned something about myself. But it's all extremely subjective. There isn't an objective approach, as >>237586 said sometimes these pills work like blood pressure medicine.

The problem though is that there can be long term effects and neuronal restructuring leading to permanent changes. This mixed with the fact that doctors have no idea how it really works and just prescribe stuff happily until something 'works' makes me sceptical of this industry. Still I do understand that someone would try it. We're already living in dystopia, might as well adapt to its vices.

 No.237825

>>237502
UPDATE:
i got off of them because they made me more depressed than before and they stopped working for my chronic back pain. so fuck that shit. but yea the first week was amazing, after that meh pretty shit. try what you like i guess.

 No.237827

That shit made me feel like a zombie, I only took them for a week or so and then I threw the pills away. My depression lasted during most of my 20s, but now it's healing naturally. I feel much better and I'm not a slave to some jew pills.

 No.238064

>>218735
It's been more than 6 months the last time I tried this shitty Amitryptiline and I still have brain fog, speech issues(overall slow speech, mixing up words, stopping mid-sentence, etc) mild constipation and a bunch of other extremely annoying symptoms.
I can't tell If it's the drug or just depression but I've never had physical symptoms that I could attribute to sadness or anxiety… I took it only for 2 days but I've also taken this shit prior for weeks and it didn't give me such problems(aside from constipation?)
These drugs are extremely weird and I have no idea why they even exist.

 No.238246

>>218735
I've tried Zoloft, Lexapro and St John's Wort. Zoloft made me psychotic and dumbed down (despite having no previous history of psychosis) - it stopped after I was off Zoloft. Lexapro made me feel like a zombie and very mentally slow, I didn't have much thoughts… at all. St John's Wort has been the most effective for me, it's cheap to buy online and is well tolerated according to meta analysis studies. It has minimal side effects and works as well, if not better, then SSRIs. It's prescribed commonly over in a few European and Oceania countries instead of SSRIs, apparently. I'd recommend St John's Wort, instead of just blocking the reuptake of serotonin, it slowly over time creates a higher density of serotonin receptors from what I understand.

 No.238588

>>218735
I've tried them all and none of them have had any effect. When I took Welbutrin for 2-3 months it didn't even reduce my nicotine cravings.

 No.239999

>>231595
Started on Zoloft and the loss of sex drive is cool. Effortless nofap. It seems to be dulling the torture of my mind from interacting with people. Being a robot is just what I wanted.

 No.240001

>>239999
I'm thinking of getting a prescription again. I stopped after I realized that if I need drugs aka medication just to function in society and not kill myself I better should kill myself. But I am not ready to kill myself for I don't know what reason, but my life is getting worse and soon I'll have no money and problems will accelerate. So might as well try the robot thing again.

 No.240007

>>240001
Some of us just do not kill ourselves when we have more than good reason to I once was talking to someone on omegle and it was someone who said they like to try stop people from ending their life so I told him about my own life and he himself said he would undoubtedly end it which is hilarious. You may be like me just too cowardly.

Can you get disability or something so you do not need to work at least?

 No.240058

>>240007
I don't believe working is worse than staying at home for the rest of my life. I'd like to have like a 3days in a week job with low requirements of social interactions. Don't need much money just so I can pay health security and food.

 No.240060

>>240058
Honestly I am a hardcore NEET hikikomori and think a 2-3day work week would actually be nice it is working full time that is a such a hassle.
If you work for yourself you do not mind putting in all your time even but being someone who goes to work in a place that restricts his autonomy to even work efficiently and explore the implementation of his skills is suffocating.

 No.242871

gave me high blood pressure, it's still there even though I stopped taking the pills,
even my meds want to kill me

 No.242886

>>237594
I've never had ssri's only TCAs and they made me feel extremely braindead, which is a very common side effect of it. Did SSRI's also make you feel braindead/slow?

 No.242903

>>218735
Got put on them as a kid, gave me permanent weight and food problems that ruined my life.
-10/10 would murder the psychiatrist that prescribed them in a fantasy.

 No.242909

>>242903
How? Care to explain anon?

 No.242930

>>242903
I wasn't actually depressed. When I was 11, my mother decided that they would somehow make me less strong-willed and more "obedient", so she doctor-shopped until someone prescribed them. They didn't do anything to my mood or behavior since I wasn't depressed, but I went from a skinny kid to 10-20 pounds overweight. I was extremely distressed by this and socially destroyed by it, but being 11 I was functionally retarded and didn't have enough frontal lobe development to stick to a diet. I've been either bulimic, anorexic, or plain binge eating ever since then and bounce between 130 and 230+lbs around once a year. The social isolation and mild bullying from being fat took me from a very outgoing and decently-liked class clown type to a massive avoidant schizo that can't look people in the eyes or go outside.

 No.242947

>>218795
>It's like you are floating away. >You feel like you are in a dream. When you are in a dream, things feel real, but they are not as tangible as in reality.
I feel like that already and I'm not on any meds. I thought it was pretty normal for people here to feel this way… This thread is weird, making me feel like I stand out between the loonies, that or you're all failed normals.
>>220283
At this point I don't really seek happiness, i just don't wanna be in this agony all the time. Some posts here actually encouraged me to take em, I was prescribed but didnt, now I kinda want to
I want to feel numb.
Completely numb, not uncomfortably/anxiously depersonalized. It sounds cathartic, honestly

 No.242959

>>242947
>you're all failed normals.
Most people here are failed normies to some extent, with some wizardry mixed in between.
There's no such thing as 100% wizard but some are closer to that some just further away

 No.242961

>>242947
>At this point I don't really seek happiness
>Completely numb, not uncomfortably/anxiously depersonalized. It sounds cathartic, honestly
But happiness is lack of discomfort and anxiety. Comfortably numb is something you get from euphoric opioids. SSRI antidepressants only gave me an uncomfortably zombie feeling - worse than being on nothing.

 No.242962

>>242947
>I thought it was pretty normal for people here to feel this way… This thread is weird, making me feel like I stand out between the loonies, that or you're all failed normals.
Of course some people feel like that and some don't

 No.242971

>>242961
Well, I think I'm gonna try them out anyways. I guess these things have different effects on each individual (to a certain extent) and since I'm already kinda feeling this way, I'm probably either going to stay the same or get a little bit better, idk. Like this anon
>>219430
Maybe he's lying, but maybe he's not, and it wouldn't hurt to try
>>242962
Oh i know, i just thought this kind of feeling was pretty much a given for depressive people

 No.242999

>>242971
Hey, I'm >>219430, Wellbutrin stopped working about 2 months later, I guess since I had tolerance it worked better, I stopped for 6 months and tried it again, but still have severe anhedonia.

 No.244860

I've been prescribed 50mg Seroquel XR, but I don't really want to take it. I'm just dependent on Clonazepam, which keeps anxiety at bay but doesn't do anything for depression.

It was either Seroquel or Lithium, not sure if I would have been inclined to take the other honestly.


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