My childhood was like a kiss on one cheek and a slap on the other. I grew up in the middle of nowhere and was bullied from a young age in every school or institution I attended so I quickly became and recluse and spent my time online. Mother came from an alcoholic family and is borderline. She would be like an angel one minute and within the hour turn into a monster, holding me down and shaking me, telling me how evil i was. Some nights I spent hours listening to her crying in the next room afterwards from her 'guilt'. Next morning would be her begging for forgiveness, only for the same thing to happen again.
Dad was a psychopathic rapist and junkie who hated me from the start. By age 10 he basically sat me down and told me he doesn't want to be my father anymore and abandoned us. I did poorly in college and had no friends, no one ever even spoke to me because I was socially retarded and quiet.
All the mental torment eventually evolved into bipolar disorder and psychosis, for which I now live with day to day in solitude, surviving off of government handouts.
In hindsight I'd like to blame my upbringing, but really I never tried at anything so I have to live with the consequences of my laziness and weakness.
My dad constantly shit on me and said I'd never amount to anything regardless of how hard I tried. He'd always criticize me constantly to the point that I'd give up before even trying since I just didn't want to hear his criticisms. My mom is an enabling doormat who is as passive-aggressive as it gets and will always act as a snotty contrarian even when she doesn't know what the fuck she's talking about.
Also shit genes, no money, no looks from their genetic dead-end material made me the quintessential loser I am now.
My parents basically ensured that I wouldn't have a normal upbringing, when I was in 2nd grade right before the 2008 crash my parents thought it was a good idea to move to Hawaii, I went from having friends and a community around me to being a complete outcast. I was bullied relentlessly by native hawaiians for being white, something that redpilled me on race at a very young age. Because my family was fucking broke we moved all around the country spending my dead granpas stock money that they had inherited, I think I never stayed in one house for more than a year for like 8 years. One of the houses we stayed at my "room" which was just an open area of the bottom floor of the house would flood whenever it rained and little worms would embed themselves on the floor. On top of that my mom has severe bi polar disorder and would often explode on me for little things that I didn't even mean to do and my dad was completely pussy whipped and was wageslaved to the max, he practically barely knows me. All of this is probably the root of my extreme attachment issues but I'm sure my mom giving birth to me in her late 30s didnt help either.
>>205898>2nd grade right before the 2008 crash
Why did you move to Hawaii? Bipolar impulsivity? Fear mongered by the crash?
>How did you or your parents ruin your life?
It's a difficult thing to talk about, I think; I was the only child, raised by a single mother, despite her obvious narcissistic and exploitative tendencies she cared for me, in a tough love sort of way, but I'm sure she believed this approach works best since she herself was raised this way. She'd spur me to do my best in school, plan my life for me, forcefully "guide" me towards what I should be interested in so I could secure a decent job later on in life etc. I rarely objected, and when I did it was in passive form: writing a diary entry or a poem chock-full of obscene words and curses aimed at myself, life, my brain and body and my mother, followed by its inevitable discovery by her, an awkward talk and heavy guilt-tripping. As a result I became neurotic, perfectionist, maximalist and spineless, not to mention the negative traits I "inherited" from her and my father. Upon receiving a B- or C+ on a test I would entertain thoughts of suicide and write suicide notes, one time I broke into tears and stabbed myself in the forearm with a pair of compasses in class; the latter happened in 6th or 5th grade, I think, but the general trend was set back 4th grade.
Like I said, I can't blame her, furthermore, I'd go as far as to say I'm somewhat thankful. If it hadn't been for her control and push I would have achieved nothing: I've always lacked clear, personal life directions and interests. If it hadn't been for her, I would have went downhill and ended up simply pointlessly existing much, much earlier in life.
>What caused your transformation to a wizard?
One life-changing wank.
I was around fourteen years old when I noticed a funny correlation: thoughts about succubi and starting a family would grow more intense the longer I didn't masturbate and disappeared immediately the moment I'd ejaculate. This and so much more dawned on me after a single wank I had while taking a bath sometime around that age, a wizardly "Eureka moment", if you will.
Obviously there were more factors that contributed to me rejecting relationships, like that one book with Medieval and Renaissance art I had that had one too many vanitas paintings.
I know this is mostly my fault, but if my parents put more effort into parenting my life would have been slightly better. I could come home with failing grades and all they would do is give a 5 minute 'do better' speech. It wasn't until I became a junior I realized how fucked my GPA was. I know in the end it was my fault, but if my parents did anything to curb my teenage stupidity may grades would have been slightly better. Same was with driving (parents never took practice driving so I learned how to do it very late), my schools volunteer work (dad found multiple places for me to volunteer one year from co-workers and never told me because 'he didn't think I was interested'. That was the same year I had to beg to get an extension on my volunteer hours), academic opportunities (I could have gotten into one of those fancy middles/high schools if my parents pushed me), and medical stuff (Parents always managed my diabetes without teaching me so when I went to college my blood sugar went crazy). I know this is my fault, but if my parents helped me with it'd I'd be in a better place. Sometimes I dream of having one of those Asian tiger parents because at least they gave a sit about their child instead of leaving them in front of a computer so they'd shut up.
Also my dad told me it was normal to shower once every two weeks and that turned out to be a big fucking lie.
>>200310>not taking revenge
wizdad and wizmom ensures the survival of the wizard race by putting wizson in wizardly situations
They reproduced. I should have never been born.
My mom just gave me the ' were going to kick you out' again, just because I was reading something and didn't know she was talking to me. Mind you she talks 24/7 anyway
Are you certainly sure that'd be the cause? I still wonder how does that works exactly…
>never met father or had any male role models at all
>raised by single mother that didn't give a shit about me, fed me nothing but junk food my whole life which caused me to become obese at a very young age
>spent every weekend alone watching tv because she would go out partying trying to desperately cling on to her youth
i was abandoned as soon as i came out of the womb
i never had a chance
My mother had me when she was 43, I think that pretty much speaks for itself
i love this picture, gives mixed feelings vibes
Poverty and my mom using the welfare she got for me to buy herself food.
They shat me out
There isn't a day that passes without me wishing they didn't do that
The usual wiz/loser making formula of a controlling mother in her 30s and whipped father who had no idea how to raise a son.
The christian indoctrination and constantly switching school while in critical developing ages sure as hell didn't help.
They are very understanding, but they can't hide their frustration.My mom somewhat hopes i come back to church in hopes God manages unfuck my life, it makes me feel a little guilty.
Man and I thought I had it bad at 37. How many birth defects do you have. I would've died in the womb but thanks to the wonders of modern medicine they "saved" me. I have 2 by the way. 1 life threatening the other annoying but both cause physical pain.
Too many factors
>I was raised in a third world guetto so my parents never let me out of the house
>my only friends as a kid were my action figures
>my mom hated my dad and she used to hit me treat me like shit when dad wasn't around
>my dad never let me do anything on my own, even today he will scold me for trying to clean the dishes or do anything around the house when I visit him.
>mom is a narcisist mouthbreather who goldigged my dad and never gave a shit about me
>was the most bullied kid at high school
>parents were constantly trying to kill each others
>have shit genetics
I hate when people say that you can't blame your parents for your life, I will always blame these fuckers for ruining mine, and now that they're getting old, they'll regret all the shit they did to me.
My parents also were very old when i was born, both around 40. I got some variant of Neurofibromatosis plus Hydrocephalus, which really is shit.
But their high age also caused that they never really did things with me that parents should do.
I was actually the second child, the first one for some reason didn't make it so something probably get screwed up with me even though I did make it out and who knows what they had her on that contributed. Otherwise she was also an abusive psycho and dad was always over working himself. I knew the future the second I was in school with others and it wasn't gonna be good.
Just googled those my man. I'm sorry. My mother had toxoplasmosis so her first baby was stillborn. I then popped out with scoliosis and variant of Thalassemia. I spent most of my childhood in hospitals. Blood sample after blood sample with extreme abdominal pain. Then when they finally found it they just told me there's no cure and I just had to live with it. I also have prostate cancer and diabetes to look forward to as it runs in my family. People should have their genes and baby checked before they bring life into this world. Because it's nothing short of cruel how they shit us out and expect us to become something with all the defects we have.
>>209588>I still wonder how does that works exactly…
PewDiePie is a tall blonde Chad with a charismatic personality, don't delute yourself
I have no answer to that question. My whole life is quite normal and boring. There was simply nothing happening and this trend continues.
I feel like Im just an observer watching other people live their lives and have no real life myself. I don't have any goals nor even the knowledge of who I am. It sounds silly but that's how I feel.
Shit genes, not fed enough (heard the shit about "fast metabolism becoz skinny" but I had cold hands and feet, flaky skin and slow-healing sores, was tired all the time, so it can't have been fast), undiagnosed allergies that fucked up my breathing, parents were domineering and controlling as fuck. Nothing was ever good enough for them and I wasn't allowed to do anything, so I learned to just stay in my room and not attract attention, not ask for anything, not try to do anything on my own. At school I was bullied constantly (for being skinny, weak, ugly, sickly, etc) so it was reinforced to do whatever it takes to avoid others, not attract attention, don't ask for anything, don't stand out, etc. My father never taught me any life skills or anything, he seemed to think that after a lifetime of being bullied and learning to keep to myself that I would just magically become confident, successful and wealthy.
Parents were still trying to control everything when I moved out at 26, I still get extremely stressed just thinking about being around them, and being passive as fuck is my permanent personality.
>raised by drug addict single mom who is always at work and never home
>no friends due to anxiety and social phobia
>stay indoors playing games every weekend every summer and all night while in public school
One of the reasons is convincing me that I was "special" and smarter, better than the others. I never was.
Same. I always saw myself as a genius now I realize I am a total airhead.
I only speak when spoken to. I never interact with people. I feel like my life is a lie
I inherited the genes of two unsocial autistic socialist outcasts. Took me out of school at age 9 and let me grow up a sissy. Missed out completely on a massive amount of social and academic education that has left me completely fucked now I’m miraculously in college. Partly becoming my fault now as I make the bare minimum effort with college, but I can blame that on essentially having been left a teenage NEET and internalising lazy habits while my parents fought and drunk their sanity away for years.
I’m still fairly young but I’ve very much given up on the idea of social integration - I only wanted to do that before I discovered what society is really like. Fitting in would require me to dramatically change myself and despite everything I’d ultimately rather keep on going alone as I am than change for the sake of some fucking normans. Also my libido is pathetic so I hardly even fap let alone desire sex, and I’ve always cringed at romantic shit. Not worth it at all far as I see it.
Mom absolutely needed to be impregnated after 40.
This resulted in me having a younger sibling that's got a whole lot of issues and in general our quality of life went down the drain with all the bickering, needless spending and damage he causes.
I have autism
I was raised by a single mum who used to go on about how retarded I was, every single morning. I'd wake up to her almost every day crying about how I was a horrible child and how no other mother has to put up with such horrible kids. She used to pimp me and my little brother out at parties for attention, going on about how sickly and special we were, I remember my brother coming home from a christmas party in tears at 11 because mum had treated him like a freakshow.
I grew up with low self esteem due to that abuse. And then as an adult, after I started having problems, my dad took me out from the mental health ward and got me employment. My dad poured his soul into helping me, but his denial of my autism and his scaremongering about life fucked me up. He kept on saying that I'd be abused and homeless unless I worked full time, and pressured me to keep employment even when I was broken and drying to kill myself every second day. I ended up becoming worse and worse and started entering psychosis, no matter how many times I'd lash out, even going as far to commit armed robbery to escape work, I was dragged back. My cries for help were called 'nutter shit' and I was told that if I ever went into a mental institution, they'd drug me to the point of being retarded and I'd be gone forever.
I'm killing myself this weekend guys.
This is my life. >>212308>>212309
Me too. I thought I was a genius for years.>>212311
I feel like I just sit by silently watching the world go by like a shadow.
Lol same, except she can functionally work since she’s been a tracher for 40 years and is very like by her students, but apart from that she’s always shouting and having hissyfits, insulting my dad, whom she fucked for 15 years straight until her lover died
Dude, at least you don't live in a disgusting dirty and depressing Russia like me. You have no idea how high the level of poverty, corruption and suicide is here. But I understand your suffering.
at least you don't live in africa where children are literally starving
I'm in my late twenties. My dad always pats my head and tickles my ribs just as you'd do to a toddler or a dog. He does this in front of visitors, in public and then gets mad at me for when I can't get people to take me seriously.. I asked him to stop every time, so perhaps over 1000 times I've asked in the last few years alone. I am doing just well speaking with someone in a store asking for what I need and he does this to me? Then they laugh and stop helping me
so this is how a 35 year old perpetual wizboy in /b/ was raised
My father obviously never wanted children, my mother sees her children as pets, dolls, children she always has to lecture despite that they're 30 year old. If you do the motions that would imply your goal is to move out of her reach, she will sabotage you, if you move out of her reach, she forgets about your existence.
My mother values obedience and loyalty from me the same way you expect from a dog you don't exactly like. It occured to me the moment I got into competitive Counter-Strike, or any other hobby really.
Once she pin-pointed that I'm enjoying myself in some way she'd threaten to take it away, or take it away/sabotage it until I gave up on my own.
The holiest thing in the household is her effort she puts into cooking. Meals are always at random times of the day, and if you had plans then, or you weren't there for it, she'd be mad at you for the rest of the day.
The biggest crime is wearing headphones, because she's randomly yelling your name from the other end of the house, and if you don't come running like a dog, she goes into crying mode
>What if I needed help?
There's three other people in the house at all times, so it's just a power thing. No matter what you're doing, it's less important than her.
I too am living life as an NPC.
great reference to that MUTTER video, my wizbrother.
By breeding 9 kids. Really wtf were they thinking? Even if they had the money there's no way they would have the time to care for half of them, and they didn't.
Now the kids are grown up to be losers hating each other
Wtf were they even thinking, wtf did they feel the need to drag me into this overcrowded family to experience this miserable childhood and shitty life.
Wish I had a time machine to kill them before I was born.
Sounds like hell, I've got two siblings and my parents never should have had more than one.
I wouldn't be born too, so everyone would be happier if that was the case.
My parents never cared about me. Being the fourth kid in a family where escalation was immminent permanently they always ignored me. So I was playing by myself and watching the TV alone all day. I don't even know what family means. What humans do. I am in my own dream world. For more than 25 years now. And the last decade I finally saw how much of a dead end failure I am compared to other people. I just wish I was dead.
Life was a mistake.