In my opinion, depression is a chronic condition with occasional spikes. One may experience severe depressive episodes that break the emotional flatline that's set by depression and those may last for a couple of months before you go back to the flatline again, at least that's my observation.
I get depression on and off, doctors call it manic depression I think, I'm not sure if it is worse than plain depression though, just the uncertainty of what day to day will be like sucks, sometimes I have a cheerful night comfy in my room playing games and then I just wake up the next day in the biggest pit of depression ever
Same. It's also called bi-polar. I've been diagnosed with it as well.
Was normal depressed for 7 years at 13 - 20
I was severely depressed 20 - 27
Now I'm normal depressed with mood swings to severe depression for the last 2 years
So in total 16 years. I'm actually at the best place. Managing normal depression with severe suicidal mood swings. I'm still a dysfunctional neet though. Having long term depression is a totally different experience, a lot of the world stops making sense because you're in a different emotional cause & effect. I didn't find much material on dealing with it.
Same boat. The problem starts when the depression state comes when I have a lot of work to do.
I hate living in a constant fear that suddenly my productivity would drop to something near 10% and everything starts going too wrong.
>>207188>successful family man who suddenly feels no joy anymore
I think that's the definition of clinical depression (if you are talking about no external factors).>30 year old NEET living in poverty
There's a lot of people living in misery that aren't depressed.
The human brain is fucking mess.
Last time I was comfortable and content, I was in fucking middle school. I will never know what it's like to be happy and an adult at the same time. My adolescence has been chemically fucked up by depression.
I was 16 when I realized that nobody will ever care about me. So 10 years
Yeah I hated mine too in middle school to a large extent but it was like being in the frying pan as opposed to on the burner now. It was like a calm middle ground between my nauseating early childhood and dull high school years where I knew for a fact I wasn't going to grow up or do anything much different than I already was with myself. I just got frozen in time.
>>207205>I hate living in a constant fear that suddenly my productivity would drop to something near 10% and everything starts going too wrong
Same here. Everytime I begin to feel the void of loneliness (that pushes me to stupid forms of fulfilling like eating) I need to silence everything by working. And then I can't stop. It's 24/07 of working and not thinking in anything else. But I'm so afraid of those days where I can't do nothing, when the void begins away (its an edgy way to say it I know). At the same time I can't relax. I can't even play WoW classic because I feel guilty. It's exhausting. Luckily now I'm on antipsychotics and the dreadful episodes of loneliness and void are silenced, and I can work in peace. But I'm tired, really tired. I wish I could just relax and chill.
congrats, it turns out you're normalfaggots and not even depressed at all. Depressed people aren't workaholics that feel fine when they're working, depression saps you of all energy and won't allow you to do anything and you never feel good no matter what you do. You moody normalfaggot cunts think feeling a little lazy one day is the same as actual depression. Just fuck off, you insult everyone here who actually has depression.
Some people are forced to work despite their illness lest they become homeless, which would in turn worsen their illness further.
That being said I agree with you; true depression is nothing like what most people make it out to be. For the sake of an example, my depression takes the form of a catatonic state with a complete cessation of all psycho-motor activity. This I believe represents in part a true condition of depression: a total drainage of spiritual and mental vitality.
Nice album, one of my favorites
Not true, everybody finds a way to cope with his illness, for some its the internet or video games, drawing, sports and for others its working. Stop this truewiz crap already.
For some people working does help them deal with it if they aren't experiencing the psycho-motor breakdown and instead feel depression as dread, doom, or are in a state of panic. "If I stop working it'll get me" or "don't look and it can't get me" kind of running away from the negative feelings since if you train your mind enough through routine and habit it will continue to distract itself when you're losing energy to do it with will/focus. Depression is very complicated and the different elements of it can be stronger in people at different times. I've gone through many variations of depression for many years and you can feel the difference when your body isn't responding and when you can feel strong negative emotions.
It is frustrating to see people who describe depression that feels less serious than yours but depression is very complicated and has different facets. I can nearly identify when my primary issue is my body not responding from when my mind can't even understand the concept of non-suffering. I've been laying in my piss soaked bed unable to move and I've been a retarded zombie in a warehouse repeating to myself "i cant kill myself yet" over and over under my breath to keep focus. We can hope in the future someone, or we, will be able to develop a more articulate system of defining our depressive experience and connect to people with the more relatable experience. It is frustrating wiz but lashing out at others is not good - it is not their fault we don't have the accurate language for this.
Good post, I like how you think.