/dep/ - Depression

I kinda stopped altogether at some point, and (I think) unintentionally just avoid everything.
I'm sure some shrink will describe this as fear of rejection or some shit, but I don't care. Not a bad thing for me
The only "friend" I have is my brother

>>234800
You are only free by yourself. You did everything right. People are cancer.

>>234802
Hell yeah Armored Saint

When i was about 13 years old, i did something which i don't exactly remember, but the consquence of it was "You are banned from our friend group" said straigt to my face. It was over something silly. Back then compared to now, i feelt enormous anxity about being alone in school then, so this was horrible. Fuck them!

>>234803
This. People are generally retarded and will only drag you down mentally.

When it dawned on me that reality and I are incompatible.

In elementary school. I was bullied relentlessly then, on up through high school, for being painfully shy.

I don't fair (fare?) any better online. Even on the internet, I'm basically put up with

>>235415
>>235414
Don't you guys think you have AVPD? I know it's basically a meme disorder but It all comes down to that in my case

for some reason I've been 'different' from other kids my age my whole life, so I didn't make many friends, and the people I befriended wound up ditching me once they realized I was a complete weirdo

I was one of those kids that always sat alone at lunch time or recess when that was a thing, for some reason I just can't connect with anyone

people usually tell me something like I am the weirdest/strangest person they've ever met because of my opinions and everything, I want friends but I will be alone forever because I'm just a novelty

I would be happy if I was the last person on Earth, I don't need people at all.

>>235498
Would you really though? You wouldn't have the internet to post on, no random people to play online video games with, heck, no people to even make videos games, movies, television, music. What would you do all day, scavenge for food and sleep in the cold, that's a bleak vision.

>>235504
Not him but assuming it's a scenario where people just vanish you'd still have books, cars for a while, could sleep anywhere inside vacant home, could travel all over.
For food you could trap small animals who would inevitably be everywhere after mankind disappear even find some chicken to keep

When I realized that not even wizards/chronic neets/social outcasts would befriend me

It's okay though, there's enough escapist media to last me a lifetime.

>>235550
Asocial types tend to repel each other. Oh well. At least you have yourself.

>>235492
I simply struggle to relate to people at all. My ideas seem to be received as utterly alien. More suffering befalls me when I step out of the safety of my self-imposed isolation. Eventually I learned that human relationships are for other people to have. I feel hardly human. I feel I was meant to be something else.

>>235584
bit melodramatic mate

fsdfsd

>>235586
I am sure it seems so but that is my subjective experience and I do not have to mince words on an anonymous image board.

>>235551
Nah, asocial types are just beginner normies online. The wizgroup I was in just turned to mainly voice chat and they don't even bother talking to people in text who aren't in the voice chat group.

I don't care what regular joes and joessas think of me during the split second that I walk by them, but I do have a fear of relationships. Like most people, I have skeletons, and if ever brought home a gf or even a regular friend, they would most definitely find out if I got too close to them and forget to hide-fucking-everything. I used to daydream where if I hypothetically had kids, I would have to take a trip to the sahara with my son/daughter and bury all of my shit ET style in a huge hole. Then I'd take my kid to an ice cream place and that moment would be my last breath of freedom.

>>235601
>if ever brought gf home
>used to daydream where if I hypothetically had kids,
Wizchan 2021

>>235602
I find it hard to believe you were born knowing you'd never be loved

>>235602
Oh no, not an hypothetical!

>>235604
Huh?

>>235604
I find it hard to believe that you're that dumb, but here we are

>>235551
I used to think this was true, but I've seen other asocial types group together with little to no problem; this place is one such example, this too >>235596 . For some reason this fraternity doesn't extend to me, very likely because of some glaring personality deficit.
>At least you have yourself
True.

>>235596
what group was that?

I was always treated like an outsider, since I have memory. No matter how much a group says they accept me or that now I'm one of them they'll always treat me as an outsider. They'll do things without inviting me alone, they'll treat the smallest mistake I do as the worst thing ever and unite against me but if someone does plain evil to me I must shrug it off and "don't exaggerate". And not even talking about abandoning me when I need help despite me being helpful to everybody to the point of staying awake until 3 AM listening to somebody's problems and cries on the phone. It even happened with my (ex) two close friends, I introduced them a classmate and they ended teaming up with him more than with me. They hypocritically will say that I don't call them or don't think about them or some shit like that. This situation has happened to me in almost every fucking group I ever was since I was a kid. No matter how much I even adapt myself to the group, they'll always do that.

As such I don't create emotional bonds with anybody since I don't trust anybody and don't expect them to treat me equally. Also I stopped long ago being helpful to everyone. But at the same time I feel better like this, I like being alone nowadays. Better alone than having shitty people around you

On the contrary OP, I was quite odd and remain odd but have no problem being liked my weird aura is seen as good I do not claim everyone likes me but I am the type of person people either really like or just do not like.

How many other wizards here have shunned society seeing it for the joke it is walking into the sunset laughing to themselves?

This wizzie does wish he could enjoy others company beyond feeling like a behavioural scientist obsering others but it is what it is.

>>235551
It's a little unrealistic to believe that two people should get along well simply because they share some asocial tendencies.

>>234800
>When did you realize you were destined to be alone forever?
Didn't fit into a VR hobby group

>>234800
If reincarnation and karma are real, I must have committed some serious transgressions in a previous life. I sometimes wonder if this reality is a simulation or some kind of cosmic prison that God/the AI/the Demiurge sent me to as some form of punishment.

>>234800
When the only friend I had in our country equivalent of middle school betrayed me.

He was my only friend, an ugly nerdo that liked anime and videogames just like me, one day for some reason he started hanging out with the "kewl" kids and left me behind.

He then started bullying me alongside those motherfuckers, I should have destroyed that stupid fucking face when I had the chance.

I hope you get lung cancer marco.

>>236855
Marco you fuck.

>>236855
Marco, you better watch out. The wiz clique is going to find you and fuck you up!

>>236855
My main bully was called Marco.

>>236855
Burn in hell marco

>>235492
Pretty sure I have that or schizoid personality disorder, to be honest

>>236855
it's hard to live without a mother you know

>>236854
don't give me false hope

>>236857
Sì

>>236854
i want to believe

>>234800
People have lied about me since I was a toddler. People make up all kinds of bizarre shit about me, I realized that it was 100% them and not me when I did all the things you’re “supposed” to do, IE markers of success, and STILL got lied about. I climbed mountains in the Alps and when I got back, people just said the following
>you’ve never travelled in your entire life, liar
>you travelled but you’re just a sex tourist and a rapist
>you travelled but you didnt leave your hotel room, you waste of time and money! You suck!
I even had videos and photos of the travelling, the climbing, my gear, etc but it didn’t matter.

Thats when I realized that I could do anything, literally anything, but it would be spat on and twisted into something negative. I realized that normies like PEOPLE, not anything actually about those people.

>>234800
>>236850

This always happens to me. Without fail i am Always the outsider.

now it is easy to blame my ugly face, and short height. In school i was always the ugly kid no one wanted around. relentlessly bullied and humiliated. I didnt like it, but i guess i could get it, im ugly, short, weak, stupid and poor. Ok, hate me.

But then you would get these groups of outsiders in HS: the nerds, the goths, the druggies, etc…

without fail, i was always rejected by all of them. the nerds, nope im dumb; the goths, im weird IN and UN COOL way; the druggies, i must be a cop even though they know me and grew up with me,

then trying these D&D groups, and trekkie groups, and weird un line communities, without fail could never make friends, people finding me creepy, no one wanting to talk to me, people wanting me to just go away.

There must be something very wrong with me, i have never been able to explain it or understand it. from my perspective i am 'normal' from the perspective of Others, i am like the stray wolf that just wamdered in the village, walking on its hind legs, they hope to shoo shoo me away, if that fails, bring out an Alpha to threaten some violence in my direction so that i get the point. You disturb the people, you give off your magical creepy vibes.

ok ok i get it, and off i go.

ehh dont feel bad for me, im happy being the weird wolf wandering around the dark woods now.

But, oh, the spiritual end, yea , i have some theories, is this punishment? maybe

>>235551

this is true, i was left alone too long, that i now talk to myself like Tom Hanks in castaway, and find chatting myself superior to 98% of people. i only really want to talk with high iq people. artists, and things like that. dumb people i will play dumber than them and wander off