You are only free by yourself. You did everything right. People are cancer.
Hell yeah Armored Saint
When i was about 13 years old, i did something which i don't exactly remember, but the consquence of it was "You are banned from our friend group" said straigt to my face. It was over something silly. Back then compared to now, i feelt enormous anxity about being alone in school then, so this was horrible. Fuck them!
This. People are generally retarded and will only drag you down mentally.
When it dawned on me that reality and I are incompatible.
In elementary school. I was bullied relentlessly then, on up through high school, for being painfully shy.
I don't fair (fare?) any better online. Even on the internet, I'm basically put up with
Don't you guys think you have AVPD? I know it's basically a meme disorder but It all comes down to that in my case
for some reason I've been 'different' from other kids my age my whole life, so I didn't make many friends, and the people I befriended wound up ditching me once they realized I was a complete weirdo
I was one of those kids that always sat alone at lunch time or recess when that was a thing, for some reason I just can't connect with anyone
people usually tell me something like I am the weirdest/strangest person they've ever met because of my opinions and everything, I want friends but I will be alone forever because I'm just a novelty
I would be happy if I was the last person on Earth, I don't need people at all.
Would you really though? You wouldn't have the internet to post on, no random people to play online video games with, heck, no people to even make videos games, movies, television, music. What would you do all day, scavenge for food and sleep in the cold, that's a bleak vision.
Not him but assuming it's a scenario where people just vanish you'd still have books, cars for a while, could sleep anywhere inside vacant home, could travel all over.
For food you could trap small animals who would inevitably be everywhere after mankind disappear even find some chicken to keep
When I realized that not even wizards/chronic neets/social outcasts would befriend me
It's okay though, there's enough escapist media to last me a lifetime.
Asocial types tend to repel each other. Oh well. At least you have yourself.
I simply struggle to relate to people at all. My ideas seem to be received as utterly alien. More suffering befalls me when I step out of the safety of my self-imposed isolation. Eventually I learned that human relationships are for other people to have. I feel hardly human. I feel I was meant to be something else.
bit melodramatic mate
I am sure it seems so but that is my subjective experience and I do not have to mince words on an anonymous image board.
Nah, asocial types are just beginner normies online. The wizgroup I was in just turned to mainly voice chat and they don't even bother talking to people in text who aren't in the voice chat group.
>>235601>if ever brought gf home>used to daydream where if I hypothetically had kids,
I find it hard to believe you were born knowing you'd never be loved
Oh no, not an hypothetical!
I find it hard to believe that you're that dumb, but here we are
I used to think this was true, but I've seen other asocial types group together with little to no problem; this place is one such example, this too >>235596
. For some reason this fraternity doesn't extend to me, very likely because of some glaring personality deficit.>At least you have yourself
what group was that?
I was always treated like an outsider, since I have memory. No matter how much a group says they accept me or that now I'm one of them they'll always treat me as an outsider. They'll do things without inviting me alone, they'll treat the smallest mistake I do as the worst thing ever and unite against me but if someone does plain evil to me I must shrug it off and "don't exaggerate". And not even talking about abandoning me when I need help despite me being helpful to everybody to the point of staying awake until 3 AM listening to somebody's problems and cries on the phone. It even happened with my (ex) two close friends, I introduced them a classmate and they ended teaming up with him more than with me. They hypocritically will say that I don't call them or don't think about them or some shit like that. This situation has happened to me in almost every fucking group I ever was since I was a kid. No matter how much I even adapt myself to the group, they'll always do that.
As such I don't create emotional bonds with anybody since I don't trust anybody and don't expect them to treat me equally. Also I stopped long ago being helpful to everyone. But at the same time I feel better like this, I like being alone nowadays. Better alone than having shitty people around you
On the contrary OP, I was quite odd and remain odd but have no problem being liked my weird aura is seen as good I do not claim everyone likes me but I am the type of person people either really like or just do not like.
How many other wizards here have shunned society seeing it for the joke it is walking into the sunset laughing to themselves?
This wizzie does wish he could enjoy others company beyond feeling like a behavioural scientist obsering others but it is what it is.
It's a little unrealistic to believe that two people should get along well simply because they share some asocial tendencies.
>>234800>When did you realize you were destined to be alone forever?
Didn't fit into a VR hobby group
When the only friend I had in our country equivalent of middle school betrayed me.
He was my only friend, an ugly nerdo that liked anime and videogames just like me, one day for some reason he started hanging out with the "kewl" kids and left me behind.
He then started bullying me alongside those motherfuckers, I should have destroyed that stupid fucking face when I had the chance.
I hope you get lung cancer marco.
My main bully was called Marco.
Burn in hell marco
Pretty sure I have that or schizoid personality disorder, to be honest
don't give me false hope
i want to believe
People have lied about me since I was a toddler. People make up all kinds of bizarre shit about me, I realized that it was 100% them and not me when I did all the things you’re “supposed” to do, IE markers of success, and STILL got lied about. I climbed mountains in the Alps and when I got back, people just said the following>you’ve never travelled in your entire life, liar>you travelled but you’re just a sex tourist and a rapist>you travelled but you didnt leave your hotel room, you waste of time and money! You suck!
I even had videos and photos of the travelling, the climbing, my gear, etc but it didn’t matter.
Thats when I realized that I could do anything, literally anything, but it would be spat on and twisted into something negative. I realized that normies like PEOPLE, not anything actually about those people.
This always happens to me. Without fail i am Always the outsider.
now it is easy to blame my ugly face, and short height. In school i was always the ugly kid no one wanted around. relentlessly bullied and humiliated. I didnt like it, but i guess i could get it, im ugly, short, weak, stupid and poor. Ok, hate me.
But then you would get these groups of outsiders in HS: the nerds, the goths, the druggies, etc…
without fail, i was always rejected by all of them. the nerds, nope im dumb; the goths, im weird IN and UN COOL way; the druggies, i must be a cop even though they know me and grew up with me,
then trying these D&D groups, and trekkie groups, and weird un line communities, without fail could never make friends, people finding me creepy, no one wanting to talk to me, people wanting me to just go away.
There must be something very wrong with me, i have never been able to explain it or understand it. from my perspective i am 'normal' from the perspective of Others, i am like the stray wolf that just wamdered in the village, walking on its hind legs, they hope to shoo shoo me away, if that fails, bring out an Alpha to threaten some violence in my direction so that i get the point. You disturb the people, you give off your magical creepy vibes.
ok ok i get it, and off i go.
ehh dont feel bad for me, im happy being the weird wolf wandering around the dark woods now.
But, oh, the spiritual end, yea , i have some theories, is this punishment? maybe>>235551
this is true, i was left alone too long, that i now talk to myself like Tom Hanks in castaway, and find chatting myself superior to 98% of people. i only really want to talk with high iq people. artists, and things like that. dumb people i will play dumber than them and wander off
>>237406>But then you would get these groups of outsiders in HS: the nerds, the goths, the druggies, etc…
I've never seen "outsider" groups IRL during my time in school (years back), are they something that only appear in america?
When I was in HS there were no outsiders people were aggressive and mean but they did not pick on anyone for being weird.
the nerds hung with the nerds the druggies with everyone and so on.
bullying only happened if you were actually weird and maybe deserved it in one of my highschools.
'If you were actually werird'
couldnt say what goes on outside Burgertown, i went to school here but, yea, band, chess D&D groups, druggies would run with each other,
i tried to join Every Single One , blew off by all, without fail they d always find me too weird/ CREEPAAH. the funny thing to me was i was just being my normal usual self lol , but i guess boring ugly white guy is too weird . im invisible as long as i dont communicate with people. the chaos starts when i'd try to make friend s or join groups
INB2 Frickin normie, never had friends and wnats one >>237416
> only happened if you were actually weird and maybe deserved it
oh do tell, Mr. popularity, hangin out here
Maybe you're too based for normans. I find myself being the outsider in every group as well. Though, I've always had a habit of keeping to myself and minding my own business.
This reeks of normalfaggotry
succubus hands wrote this post
I'll wind up permanently banned from this site somehow. There's a force at work keeping me from forming lasting bonds with other humans even if only anonymously.
Become like the hivemind or perish and starve alone
conform and consoom tbh
>>237539>There's a force at work
i kind of completely passed over the Supernatural element. I've always had religious beliefs. My life has been way too fucked up and unlucky to have had all this be random.
A couple theories i have. That my life is some Sadistic Truman Show, for something somewhere to laugh at.
That perhaps i am being punished for something else.
i've always sort of felt that i am Cursed. and searching that led me down a road of occultic stuff that convinced me i probably am cursed and being punished for things. On top of everything else being horrid in my life. No one notices or cares now, but when i had family still in my life they would always note how fuckign unlucky i am. I am like , very similar to the guy in that movie The Cooler, minus any relationships or any kind or happy ending. I am bad luck. me just being around causes bad shit to happen. And, i would ask, when i was young, why? why is it happening? and, at best the reaction i'd get is, who cares, get lost you ugly little fuckign turd. And, sure enough when i left all would be set back to normal.
my 'former' christian faith mocked and laughed at me for this, and well everything else. "Oh Anon there are no curses or cursed people" "HUFF HUFF HUFF" uhhh isnt The Book filled with curses and cursed people? (blank stare) How do i un curse myself?? (angry face/ who is this lunatic) (hope this weird ugly kid who actually read what we pretend to believe goes away)
My final theory. A work in progress. Is that i did this to myself. by that i mean i actually chose this scenario life to live out. like a crow bar only run through in half life or something to that effect. to win the equivalent of the platinum trophy on the other side.
>>237560>My final theory. A work in progress. Is that i did this to myself. by that i mean i actually chose this scenario life to live out. like a crow bar only run through in half life or something to that effect. to win the equivalent of the platinum trophy on the other side.
Please do not abandon the Faith because of some churchNPC's. I have felt everything in your post all my life. God puts those of us most worthy of his Kingdom through the most severe trials and tribulations but just try to keep on fighting bro there's a Heaven for a wiz. Well wishes, wiz.
It's like you're trying to shame other people for not having read the bible and not tolerating your excursions into occultism as a cope for never having read Job.
I have the exact same story and am wondering about a curse too. My very early childhood was 180 degrees the opposite and then turned into what it is now. What the fuck happened? The only thing I can think of is a curse. Maybe gangstalking?
Hope we can compare notes
>Shunned by "friends" /any group I've ever tried to be apart of
I was too but looking back on it in hindsight I was a pretty jerkish and selfish kid, I can see why others didn't wanna be my friend.
>>237581>>237572>Please do not abandon the Faith
the point was the book is loaded wth curses despite what modern day clowns would say, And unlike the ancient people
today we have ZERO remedy and will only mock the cursed>>237581
google planet Saturn , the number 8 , christianity and curses. it will take you down an interesting and unpleasant road
>>237560>A couple theories i have. That my life is some Sadistic Truman Show, for something somewhere to laugh at.
>That perhaps i am being punished for something else.
These exact thoughts are what lead to my schizophrenic episode. I have to take medication for it and it has destroyed my physical health.
did you self-induce schizophrenia?
No. What I meant is sometimes your weird theories are actually a product of paranoid delusions. Luckily, most true wizards are too old to develop schizophrenia if they have not already.
you might be confusing schizophrenia diagnosis with schizoposting as a meme
No. Every post I make it seems like I have to justify and/or explain myself. The next time it happens, I'm just not going to say anything.
it's the new hip mental illness just like autism was in 2010s, people are calling themselves schizos because they think it's cool n mysterious in the same way people called themselves autists for playing Minecraft a bit too much
self-diagnosis is sick. people will adopt ANYTHING to get a leg up in hipster cred.
I don't think it's just a hipster meme. I genuinely believe social media and drug use is increasing the prevalence of schizophrenia
I know drugs can cause schizophrenia - or, at least, cause it to manifest or come out or whatever.
How does social media do so? I dont know enough about it
I think you're right. There's something about the way information is presented online that seems to 'click' with the pattern recognition in the brain that makes people see connections that may or may not be there. This, I believe, is partly to blame for big increases in conspiracies that would have otherwise been dismissed by most people (think Flat Earth, Extreme Antivaxx, Election rigging etc.)
Personally, I have started to notice numbers, particularly with religious/esoteric significance. Rationally I think this is absurd, but subconsciously I make note of such occurrences
You say "social media and drug use" as if they're two different things.
wish i had schizo, seems only genius get to have it
I feel similiar about curses and I'm also from a religious background.
I'll see. If life will continue to just be this way I will be sure.
and me, I wasn't a great kid.
I was like that kid, sacrificed my friendship thinking that would make the bullies lay off of me and accept me as one of their own, it didn't work. Honestly one of the worst things i've done to another person and all for nothing too.
>>236686>Better alone than having shitty people around you
I was only shunned from a "friend" group once. They weren't really friends, just people I kinda just stuck around with so I wouldn't look like a loser.
Turns out I just never really put in any effort to make any friends.
I'm that orangutan. I've been that orangutan my whole life
I didn't realize that I would be alone forever as much as realize that I would 'feel' alone forever. I can be around family, I can be around 'friends' it doesn't make me feel complete. I constantly feel like no source of conversation will ever feel sufficient or worthwhile. It's just pointless whenever I bother I feel unfulfilled, I compare I judge the topic, the amount. I'm getting fed up with trying. There's an emptiness in me that simply can not be filled, why feed it?
I was extremely high strung as a kid which caused people to bully me because they thought it was amusing how pissed off I would get. While I did have a group of outcasts I would hang out with at school, I would have a 'limit' so to speak as to how long I could socialize with them. After a certain point I would become very irritable and want them to leave me alone, which naturally alienated me from them over time.
By the time I was a teen they would tolerate my presence at best since we had known each other for so long. I was then becoming very opinionated and rebellious as most teens do, on top of having a low emotional intelligence. By the end of high school I was just about done speaking to anyone and they had all begun flourshing into adults while I remained an irritable manchild who spent most of his money on old video games. By that point I realized that I'm never going to get to lead a normal life.
TL;DR I realized I was going to be alone forever because I have low emotional intelligence and naturally gravitate towards solitude.
When I realized I was too good for normie's friendship and too dumb to hold an intellectual conversation with a wizard.
The worse thing is how avoidable the problems were in hindsight. Guess I am just screwed up compared to everyone else somehow.