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/dep/ - Depression


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Let's be honest, wizards here have severely broken heart. What broke yours? And don't misinterpretet these words, I am NOT talking about succubi.


My family.


Childhood pet dying.


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Cartoon characters aren't real.


Ever since I got out of jail five years ago I've felt like I've been in hell - not that it's been one bad thing after another, but instead an unending cycle of hope and optimism crushed by my own folly. Often I think about how I ended up in this situation and the superficial reason is that I make dumb, impulsive decisions that ruin any positive momentum I might have built; the deeper, more depressing realisation though is that I'm unconsciously predisposed towards self destruction. If it were just a matter of poor choices, then at least I could hope to make better ones. Instead I'm doomed to make the same mistakes over and over again, and this knowledge thus sours any success I might have.

I've tried praying and meditating, I've been to see therapists and tried to seek help. I even went to church for the first time in over a decade. I can't believe in anything for the life of me though.


Antisocial personality disorder?


I've never gotten a diagnosis other than depression/anxiety. Albeit, when I was seeking psychotherapy corona was in full swing and all the good therapists were booked.

At any rate, I don't think knowing my psychosocial horoscope will really change anything though.


Ironically your statement describes BorderlinePD more accutarely. BPD in wizchads is usually misdiagnosed as ASPD (which is a genuine disregard for relations and affection).


The human capacity for senseless evil and cruelty. It's what makes me want to get away from it all.


Late night snacking.


>a single mistake that fucked you
>at what moment you realised you're X
>what broke your heart
who makes all this shitty threads


oh fuck that hurt me, might seem silly but I had a hampster and his death fucked me up


Wizkids and/or marketers and/or statisticians


Drugs and bad habits. Now I feel my heart every day. You know, the biological one.


I hoped and tried too much for too long time that I just grew tired of thinking things (life/my deceased mind/ my relationship with peers) would change for the better.
I just came to the conclusion that just won't happen as an either you got it or you don't situation.

Wouldn't surprise me about marketers


yeah man, the depressed NEET market just rakes in the cash.


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One of my earliest childhood memories that my mother occasionally relates to me was a toy day at preschool. We had little mailboxes that people would put valentines, administrative announcements, birthday party invitations, crafts and stuff to take. I must have been sick because I missed the announcement or calendar that said we were having a toy day, because what happened was I came to school that day and everyone brought elaborate trucks, board games, playmobile whatever. Anyways I remember asking another kid if I could play with his nice toy trucks, and offered to let him see my ratty stuffed animal which was the only thing I happened to have, to which he very harshly said NO in front of the other kids. I started welling up with tears then went and sat in the corner and cried for the rest of the day. I went home and cried more to my mother. First memory of really feeling unliked and alone.


One of my earliest memories was crying saying I hate myself I must have been around 5 or 6.
There was a lot of trauma when I was a child I did not like authority I learnt to disobey even to my own detriment because if I did that I still had some sort of control I realy feel helpless and without hope especially as a child.

I am not a wizard because some succubus broke my heart I do not think that is wizardly but I do have memories of people being close to me betraying me or harming me for their own gain.

I actually had a friend who chose his succubus over me despite her being unironically mentally disabled and a bitch.. but that did not bother me I was glad to know where I stood concerning him.

Children threw their poo at me in elementary school I never understood why I was hated I was different I shut down I lived within my own world yet had no visual imagination so would think a lot and immerse myself in vidya.

Eventually I embraced being different and now it is respectable I can tell the normgroids envy my ability to be myself but the truth is I do not even know who I am.


You underestimate the greed of business


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finding out wizchan was always a larp from day 1 made by psycho normies and their gfs to find chris chan tier autists to harass and stalk


I've felt like a prisoner ever since I was a kid sent to preschool and as soon as I realized my parents were dumb. I was born at odds with civilization.


haha me too


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My mother during her last year on this Earth telling me I'm useless and will be absolutely fucked without her. She was fine up to that point. I guess impending death can bring out the honesty in people. Another one I remember distinctly is just staring into the CRT, looking at my dull reflection at around 9 years old, and realizing then and there that this is who I am, I won't grow out of the autism; childhood is the endgame.


Was she right? Have you managed okay without her?


Sure, just in the wrong order. I still have my dad and I'm a NEET rapidly approaching 30. Once he's dead I'm just about fucked. I don't really see how her being right would matter, she had an autistic child, would get mad at it for showing symptoms. Smoked during pregnancy too. But wait, call in the next 15 minutes and we'll include a FREE pamphlet explaining the risks of pregnancies over 40!


A succubus also the shithole country that i live people are shit everything is shit


I hope you mean your mom or a family succubus ruining your life. Otherwise be gone evil spirit.


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I can relate to that, I will never forget the moment my mother came out of the screening and I hear the crying of her in my mind, while she was getting carried through the halls in her bed, sitting, crying into these grayish toilet papers knowing this will be her last evening, which it was. There is this unwritten rule that you will die within 5 years after your significant other has died and this rule took full grip on my mother. I have abandoned that whole idea since and look to nothing but the endless void that is existence until it consumes me whole.


>wizards are born with an ultimate knowledge of the world
>look son, who's there? that's mommy, say MO-MMY


Further proof that third-worlders can't be wizards. Just look at China and India. They breed like rabbits, those filthy sex havers.


What broke my heart is that i'll never be anything. I always thought I was somewhat special because of my luck and how I lived for so long but honestly cracks of my mortality shows up and realize i'm just another faggot. It fucking sucks I can't be something else, I can't like the people in fantasy or a powerful being. I'm just another bodybag.


What were you jailed for?


This is idiotic, people on the US and Europe fuck the same, the only difference is that they use condoms.

Hell its even worse on the 1st world where feminism taught succubi to fuck pretty much every single male around and whoring themselves on OF.


False, first world succubi won't fuck just any guy. They only go after a certain type of man, i.e. not the wizardly type.
In the third world, they'll fuck any guy because feminism hasn't contaminated their brains yet and gave them high expectations.


Third world succs will fuck anyone with a job, hoping they get pregnant so they can put the guy on child support. Never trust third worlder succs.


My dad died and he was the only person I loved in this world.


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Realizing that I had something wrong with me, and that people pitied me, it turned me against everything. I never had any real ambitions either, can thank parental neglect and abuse for that.


Losing a friend I made shattered my brain worse than anything could have it is amazing even to me how i reacted I bet they never even think of me but it is all I ever think about.


fuck adulthood. i wish i was more childish.


Realizing things could have gone different if I was born different with another family, a well-estabilished family if you know what I mean. But things went south, now I can't change my past, my knowledge or the deep scars that sometimes still haunt me. Dear friends, the feeling of hopelessness is the worst thing a human could feel, it shatters your whole world


Loss of a nation.


Syria? Iraq? What African country?


Christian, Eurasian nation.


But condolences to once great South Africa too.

Actually, even those you mentioned once had great civilications.


don't say that, i bet a lot of people here have nowhere else to go, me including


Realizing I was different from other people, that and the cruel hand of reality.


this, and grandparents dying. i was closer to them than i am to my mom. also when i realized medicine is evil now.
i dont think everything has a cure, or even most things, but doctors are like vultures. they do all this bullshit to people at the end of their lives that doesnt do anything and then give you huge bills for it. in my grandma's case, it was their own errors and neglect that caused her final month of her life to be 24/7 hellish pain. i hope those doctors watch their own families suffer the same or worse.


Having high expectations for myself and not being able to reach them.


You sound like you need to learn a little more about the world.

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