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 No.248819[Last 50 Posts]

Discuss the ways out of our eternal suffering in this thread. Good death to everyone!


how to acquire a gun in russia as a schizo?


Personally I will most likely use my SN to take the exit. Hanging via longdrop seems like it takes a lot of guts and suspension hanging looks prone to failing enough that it is too scary to decide to use that method over SN.


a proper hanging will immediately kill you, what happens is the fall combined with the tight rope breaks the vertebra in your neck and severs your spinal cord, you immediately lose all feeling of your body and just fade out into death's embrace


One thing to consider before suicide is theories of personal identity. If your aim is to escape existence, you may want to consider the implications of self termination under such frameworks as Open Individualism.


Good luck.


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jesus fuck stop posting this drivel you fuckin retardc.


The image is more interesting than most of what is said in these threads.


It could be the next fucking bible for all I care, once I've seen it 30 times I don't give a shit about it.


You're not forced to reply/open it.


Do you have some reason for disagreeing with the idea?


>he posted it again


I tried to find the answer on google, but I couldn't quite get it. When I hang myself, do I place the rope above my adams apple? I've seen videos of hangings where the rope is low on the neck, others are tucked neatly under the chin.

Thinking about using a belt or cord and hanging off my bedframe


Check out lostallhope.com or the 8chan suicide board on archive. I would not reccommend using sanctioned suicide because it is ran by the crab king (owns 8 crab forums) and is filled with normalfaggots.





why do we need a thread for this LARPing cringefest? if you are gonna kill yourself, just do it. you dont need to be an attentionwhoring faggot about it. this is the antithesis of what wizchan is all about. none of you are actually depressed and you will only kill yourself when you are 30 and realize that you look like shit after transitioning


Nigger. Half of this thread is asking about methods and the other half is shitposting about reincarnation. Nobody is attentionwhoring or transitioning except for the little tranny living rent free in your head.


File: 1634718060197.pdf (3.35 MB, Julio Cabera CritiqueAffir….pdf)

Whose the one larping? https://wizchan.org/banners/all.php we even have a banner about the suicide general.

We may as well post some pessimistic philosophy while we are at it in this thread.


is there any expiration date for SN? will it alter it's effects?


as long as your SN is airtight it should be fine forever. it is oxygen that makes the sodium nitrite into sodium nitrate. I had a nightmare the other night that my SN was opened and all turned to shit. My SN was opened once sadly but you can test with a regent test or something if your SN is still good or not.


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i've been keeping it in a plastic bottle with a screw cap ever since i bought it. it is the original container it was originally sent in to me (pic related). is that a sufficient protection from oxygen?


So many of us are extremely terrified of fucking it up and becoming a vegetable


If it is sealed you should not need to worry at all.
when everything always go wrong for you it is not a stretch to think you will be one of those unlikely statistics. On this topic there is info on the suicide wiki that does not seem genuine about SN. https://suicide.wiki/w/Sodium_Nitrite#Consequences_of_failure Under consequences of failure it details how SN poisoning can be reversed and people can recover. There have been a handful of people on SS who have failed and had no problems but it makes no sense to think this can be consequence free. How can you be deprived from oxygen for 15-20 minuets and start breathing again and not have problems? The way it is worded makes it sound as if there is nil risk.


Are there any airguns that could be used in order to take your life


I keep hearing mixed things about heroin overdose, anyone know what's right? Some say it's the best method as you go out on a high, others say it's a horrible with no explanation given. Which is right?

(This is for future reference btw, not planning on doing it until my mother's dead)


considering that doctors use morphine to mercy kill suffering patients I can only think the people saying it is horrible are anti freedom and pro suffering.


Yeah he wrote about it, it's called longdrop and it's not easy to do. Executioners had detailed manuals, specially designed metal parts that go on the rope and they still had some failures where the hanged would just choke.


when all your live you made wrong choices and everything went the wrong way yes your suicide have very high chance to fail that's the sole reason that keeps me away from trying

How am i supposed to have faith in this if everything, and i mean every single detail failed in my life? How can i be sure i won't fail?


So how do you intend to gather the courage to go through with it?

I keep gathering the materials then pussying out.


That's what I thought too, but every time the method is discussed, there's always some idiot saying it's a horrible/painful way to die.


I concluded that it is the ideal method after extensive research. There are many reports from heroin users who had overdoses. Anti-drug retards everywhere say shit about drugs when they have never even tried anything


not sure, i planned that i'll throw myself under a train many years ago, but never actually did it. even when the feelings get unbearable, i always pathetically think about looking for 'help' as if a mental hospital could help me, instead of ending it like a man. i hated normal people always crawling like worms to stay alive, but my fear made me like them.


>One thing to consider before suicide is theories of personal identity. If your aim is to escape existence, you may want to consider the implications of self termination under such frameworks as Open Individualism.
Mario Alejandro Montano did just that. His basic argument for suicide despite this is that even he continues existing after his death, death is still the most powerful transformative agent of consciousness that we know of. Even if death isn't the end, chances are that his next life would be better than this one.

From his blog:

>Suicide is currently my best option since it is the best transformative agent for the contents of consciousness that I can think of. I still feel that rationally considered, the boredom, malaise, anxiety, shame, pain, absurdity, loathing etc. is not worth the scant rewards in my human life. There is a vast ocean of radically different mind configurations of which my locus forms but a meaningless fraction of a dust speck. The idea that out of all possible modes of being across eternal probability space, I would be this human is frankly repugnant.


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>the fall combined with the tight rope breaks the vertebra in your neck and severs your spinal cord
Which means that you will be a quadriplegic if you fail.


this guy is such a pseudo quack, i hope no one here takes anything he says seriously


mental hospitals feed you drugs and od not help you unless bipolar or schizo.


I think I can help here a bit with some anecdotes. I have lost consciousness many, many times over the years I was actively using heroin. I have also "officially" (for lack of a better word) over dosed twice, where I woke up in an emergency room, got shot up with the narcan.. the whole thing. I was one of those guys who needed multiple shots to be revived the second time as I had also mixed in kpins… With that out of the way, the two times I had the legit overdoses, it was peacefully lights out. No coming to light shit, no build up, it was literally like going to sleep and then waking up in the emergency room confused. I had a buddy who overdosed and died. His brother found him convulsing. Apparently he "looked like he was in pain" and was even choking on his own mix of vomit and blood, which his brother got in his moth trying to give cpr… So, ultimately, it is tough to say man. I guess if you want my opinion or plan. I am planning to get drunk and either go by no drop full suspension or rifled slug shotgun shells. I just cant trust a heroin od to really do the job and not leave me as a vegetable. When I go, I WONT fuck it up–you know what I mean?


Oh, I feel I should also mention that I was an IV user. Each and every time, especially the narcan overdoses, were shooting the dope.


I think I want to schedule with a euthanist but it might be illegal since I’m a lobotomy victim. I had no anesthetic. I hate my life so much and it’s filled with little sexual torture bits that I hate so much that just don’t fucking stop. I cannot bring myself to be happy without the help of copious amounts of alcohol and the sounds of cuckolding fill the air at night in my den each eve. and I been eyeing this spot in the shed where I could do a rope up and climb a bucket, they’re 11$ and I get WU cash. I’m afraid it’s going to hurt and I really just want everything to be perfect instead. I hate that I have to do this. Why did my surgeon do this to me dude I want to curl up with a grenade and scream all at the same time, very frustrating


Holy shit that's brutal. You literally got lobotomized? What happened?


I'm not sure about Russia but usually you can acquire illegal arms & drugs just through normie social media, mainly snapchat


i'm bad with social media. never had idea how people get drugs so easily.


Well they clapped me to a ward and declared me a methamphetamine addict first. I was not allowed to leave for a period of 4months if involuntary treatment to beat a meth charge. And then they filed through the court for me to have neurosurgery in a sort of holocaust like event for my comorbid Bipolar I with suicidal features. I saw a corrupt psych from behind the doors of the psychiatric facility who told me he’d make me retarded. and then two teams of doctors all under lock and key involuntarily. My family would drive me down and tell them all about the meth and alcohol use and they’d 5150. I had committed no murder or rape at the time but meth possession. They went on and on about fearing my next high would trigger a manic episode that I would kill myself or others on and proudly declared they were going to “save my life with neurosurgery that makes it impossible to move” and “curb my manic, homicidal thinking and cocaine use” following a mock trial. even though I hanged they insisted in the court I was homicidal and they bought it. truth is I wasn’t addicted to meth neither homicidal but to tobacco and ethanol and was in a state of deeply depressed suicidal ideation. Then they jabbed my arm on s gurney and I woke up strapped down in Canada. He said since I’m an alcoholic anesthetic is too good for me and started to take razors and stuff to my brain.


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>And then they filed through the court for me to have neurosurgery in a sort of holocaust like event for my comorbid Bipolar I with suicidal features.

So you were self-harming beforehand and the meth use rotted your brain where you had a tic that caused you to hit yourself constantly. This is the only way involuntary neurosurgery is approved, at least in the US. Surgeons are loathe to do it because, being honest, they know nobody on meth is going to treat their bodies right and it will just be a waste of their effort. You were put through at least 3-4 years of intense sedatives to try and control your spasms until, after your 20th psych hold, multiple doctors finally agreed that you needed a part of your brain removed so you would stop hitting yourself.

If you were truly only messed up on normie drugs like tobacco/alcohol, you'd have been sent to prison instead. Which you were at one point, and then you did something there that made it clear you'd only get yourself killed.

Considering the circumstances I think you ended up lucky, many people in your position go straight to the homicide part and spend the rest of their lives behind bars. The fact that you are posing here indicates that you aren't in a controlled facility (an actual control zone, a halfway house or group home with unrestricted external web access doesn't count). You are the reason the national mental health crisis hotline/911 alternative is happening because the police no longer want to deal with you. This is a unique power you should embrace.


Even universe will die so what makes you think that you will pop up ? Same could be said for an ant . There is no infinite life because at some point universe itself will die out.

Even if your theory is correct then life cycle will continue until heat death of universe. So in the end everything would be simple energy as neuron , proton that will never meet again to form a new universe. Everything ends eventually


So what? I was suicidal and you refused me proper medication on a misdiagnosis. We’ve been through this before. Rehab would’ve been a good pick from the get go. None of the dozen trips to wards. What about the electricity torture? I was afflicted with so much suffering and addiction and you delivered a nightmare of stripped rights and humiliation and sometimes pain. I can’t complain too much more though. In my opinion the whole system needs to be re-evaluated, they ice picked in bed, I did nothing but cry on the inside and felt like a victim, I didn’t understand I was sick, I was imprisoned and wished to go home and stop being brain tortured


Is Jumping in front of subway train best method If you don't have access to guns?
I think that and jumping of a building are my only choices.
In my mind if I jumped in front of the train there's no chance to survive, is there a chance?
I just don't wanna survive.
Can anyone give me any advice on this?


Your biggest risk in committing suicide is someone catching you and stopping you in or before the act.

If you don't have access to a gun, then using an inert gas and a cpap is typically the next goto.

But remember, don't get caught. You probably have a bunch of people who are suspicious of you as is.


I know, that's why I think jumping as the train approaches is my best bet.
I don't know how to get other methods like the one you said to work and cause I don't go out at all I think it'd raise suspicions (getting the stuff and coming back).


>file deleted
What image was there?


Anyone here had or knows anyone who got a non-fatal dose of carbon monoxide? What was the pain like?


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I'm thinking about buying cyanide from the deep web to kill myself, how do I do it safely without getting in legal trouble or getting scammed? Does anyone here who has bought drugs/anything else from the deep web have any tips?


Encrypt your address with PGP. Only buy within your country, from a seller than has a lot of feedback. Check forums for any information about the seller. You won't be able to get cyanide because it has no recreational usage, so switch to heroin or fentanyl instead. Preferably use Tails on a USB drive. Preferably don't write things like your wizchan message online without a VPN. Defending yourself against law enforcement is an endless rabbithole, you don't have to go extreme about it but this is a matter of opinion.


why would you go that route? if you were going to buy something for suicide there are far better options. Did you even do any research?


How can I get "involuntarily" committed to a psych ward?

I was thinking it would be a better alternative to my current living situation and I thought it might be worth pursuing.

My current plan is to take some SN and call a hotline. They can "save" me from there.


What is you lot thoughts on carbon monoxide posioning as a suicide method? seems pretty easy and painless to me. Get a lump of coal and a small and enclosed area with little ventaltion, light it in some sort of grill or container, slowly fall asleep and then a bit later you fall asleep and you’re dead. Even the most pozzed country should allow people to buy coal, right? right?


you can just take gummie worms and claim you tried to OD and they will pump your stomache.
why do you want to be in one? have you ever been in one before?


if you take SN they need that antidote or you will actually die.


pseud cringe


Im fairly sure they are restricted by joule. If you want to shoot yourself I'm pretty sure black powder guns arent regulated there.


>What is you lot thoughts on carbon monoxide posioning as a suicide method?
>Even the most pozzed country should allow people to buy coal, right?
Carbon monoxide mimics oxygen in the body and has killed countless people troughout history. It's only noticable effect is that you feel tired as in having to go to bed. If you go the coal route you might have smell, smoke, e.t.c. but it's better than nothing. Chemically produced is what the bosrode-wizard used. If anyone has the screenshot please do post it, I have it on my other computer so I could post it tomorrow if no one else does.
As for consequenses on failiure it's similar to suspension hanging. Carbon Monoxide ultimatly kills by depriving the brain of oxygen, if you are "saved" brain damage is possible but unlike hanging there is no risk of paralyzation at least.
But like bosrode-wiz said (not quoting directly)"if I don't reply anymore you will know that you have found a safe painless way out.


Honestly, you probably don't want to be going to a psych ward. That place is full of true crazies, and the staff may even be abusive and uncaring.

It's funny to say this, but prison might actually be better. But if you know for sure that the psych ward you're going to is alright, then I guess you'll be fine.


psychward can be so so boring with nearly no freedom. Expect them to wake you up and lock your room door so you have to socialize with the schizophrenics who walk back and fourth all day yelling.

psychward can be fun. my one had a rec room we could do art in or even a massage chair we could use.


I had fun the second time I went to the psych ward, but doctors had me on like 6mg of klonopin a day just so I could be near other humans without freaking out, it gets kinda old after a while though, it would be more fun if they gave us like a snes or something to play mario and crap along with the television and drawing activities


we had computers a d TV to watch movies on but only for like 2 hours a day and forced activites


Whatever you do don't kill yourself try to seek out some professional help for your issues wherever you can. Family,Friends a support group anyone who is willing to help support you with any of your underlying issues.


Have you ever tried looking for help from anywhere.


help? he is on the suicide thread asking for help on how to hang himself so of course he is looking for help.


I've heard that Wolfsbane/ Aconitum can bank you out cold almost instantly.
Anyone suicided with it yet?


how did you even find this site? are you paid to post here?


Yes, I've been in one. It was pretty rad. It was voluntary, but I looked over my paperwork and it seems pretty obvious they thought I was malingering. If I give them some evidence of an attempt, I might get to stay longer.


What the fuck.


If you have family you could maybe cut yourself and scream about wanting to kill yourself. you will get admitted if the family call and it will seem more legitimate.

What is the story here? why do you want to get comitted? for NEETbux? you usually need to have been in one to get NEETbux and stupid succubi are always going into them for trying to OD on random pills.


Yeah, I might consider that.

I'm just thinking about how I enjoyed not really having to do anything and being given all of my meals there. I already have autismbux, but I can't imagine going inpatient will look bad if that ever comes up.


will it be free? your home life must be shit if you have to put up with so much you rather be in a ward. I can see myself enjoying a stay at one for a month or two but I would not want to live there being surrounded by people.

The schizophrenics end up making you go insane because they never stop making noise and they cannot help it but it is horrible.



What is this called? This concept? Any name to it? That is what I believe but I never found a name to this concept


not knowing how to get drugs?


Autismbux comes with Medicaid, so yeah, no cost to me.


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>The schizophrenics end up making you go insane because they never stop making noise and they cannot help it but it is horrible.

This. I was there once, and doctors wanted to put me back in for severe depression instead of just giving me meds.

I was able to talk them out of it and I'm thankful to this day. I dodged a major bullet.

Being in the ward is worse than prison.


>doctors wanted to put me back in for severe depression
I always dodged that palce as well. at first they try get you to go on your own admission and i always refused. I started going to hospital for breakdowns with SH and risky behavior and managed to talk myself out and finally I went in when they legally could nap a wizzah.
Why do the quacks always tell you to take antipsychotics and go to a ward if not schizophrenic.

I think that prospective NEETbux NEETs should consider going to the ward because it helps a lot for paperwork.

The ward is incredibly boring and you have to deal with others who are either borderline succubi or schizophrenics. Good luck sleeping when the man next to you is talking to his dead family and laughing all night.

I am convinced that the ward is best for helping undiagnosed/medicated schizophrenics and bipolar people but aside from that there is no help.


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This is quite interesting, self-waterboarding: https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s00414-021-02629-5

This is a method that I'm entirely unsure of how effective it is due to how rare it is for someone to suicide that way, but it seems like self-waterboarding may be a viable way to go, especially if you have a tub(which most people have). This seems relatively easy to do.


Seems obvious to me that it was a murder that they just classified wrongly


Lots of people die of CO posoning due to haphazard use of furnaces and power generator everytime winter rolls around. It’s gotten so bad that manufactuors are obligated to put warning signs that state “Do not use this in enclosed areas or you will die in MINUTES!”
Imagine how easy it is to do accidently. now realize how trivial it is to do it on purpose! The coal method should work just as well but however, most of the suicides are conducted in East Asia, and their coal is likely less refined or exerts more CO than western one.


Open Individualism is a related concept. It's similar to the story "The Egg".



Are you a masochist? Drowning is one of the most painful ways to die.


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Eternal return is another similar concept, although reincarnation per se doesn't necessarily imply repetition.



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Honestly this is something that worries me aswell, I've got my SN ready to go, but I'm afraid that if something goes wrong I might have to be a vegetable for the rest of my life, unable to really live, but unable to die aswell, it'd be hell on earth. Does anyone has any confirmation that SN really doesn't leave aftereffects if you survive?

Also, still on the topic of SN, is it absolutely necessary to take medications with it or is just the SN good enough for suicide?


>Does anyone has any confirmation that SN really doesn't leave aftereffects if you survive?
Well, should have the same effect on you long term as a salt overdose (not as painful of course short term). So yes, no risk of ending up a vegetable.
>is it absolutely necessary to take medications
Yes. Absolutely. You don't want to vomit it all up in your sleep to instead of peacefully drifting off into oblivion wake up with a splitting headache and blue arms covered in vomit


>Well, should have the same effect on you long term as a salt overdose (not as painful of course short term). So yes, no risk of ending up a vegetable.
I see, but like, and perhaps I'm understanding the method wrong, but isn't the idea behind the SN that your cells don't receive oxygen? If you're left in that state for some time, but get "rescued" won't the lack of oxygen to your brain cells cause any damage at all?

>Yes. Absolutely. You don't want to vomit it all up in your sleep to instead of peacefully drifting off into oblivion wake up with a splitting headache and blue arms covered in vomit

I agree that doing it without the medication isn't ideal, but can you still die with it? I recall reading many goodbye posts on Sanctioned Suicide before where people would take only the SN and apparently it would work, but now it seems that the concensus is that you need the medication, are the odds of me dying from just the SN low or is it more like 50/50?


> Does anyone has any confirmation that SN really doesn't leave aftereffects if you survive?

that is the meme, people claim it doesnt but common sense says that after being revied 30min later when your blood wont have new oxygen in it.. is.. a meme.

I used to always be on the SS site and the only people who claimed it did not leave damage were people found shortly after and there is no testing done.

it is all fucked we need a volcano to drop into


consesnsus now is more you dont need the meds and take a bigger dose of SN


What dose exactly? I recall 25g being the standard back when I browsed SS more, how much is it now?


Above the Adam's apple tucked neatly under the chin. That's the correct way, relatively quick so less painfull.


I'm gonna burn coal in the bathroom today and ingest a lot of risperidone and quetiapine, will it work?


That sounds quite underprepared.


I wasn't gonna do it, but I can't cope with life anymore.


Don't do it try seeking some professional help from local health services.


Well, by the time any permanent damage would have been done your cells can’t take up the oxygen anyways so even if the EMTs have oxygen tanks your body couldn’t absorb it.
>is the odds low or like 50/50
Genuinely have no idea about percentage but the fact that it works for some leads me to beleive it depends on your metabolism, wether/how early you throw up, body weight e.t.c.
I imagine you could boost your odds by staying awake as long as possible manually making sure you don’t vomit


Can someone share their thoughts on the following as research has not turned up any information. Will a large karge dose of a stimulant help you push past your survival instinct? I tried to do some research and found nothing and I cannot get onto SS to ask there nor do I want to talk with them types of people.

On one hand I can see a very large dose giving you the guts to kill yourself but at the same time I know the drugs other effects like paranoia could inhibit completing suicide. (SN and probably suspension for good measure)


>Shotgun to head 1.7 min
was this list just completely made up?
seriously retarded category by any metric.


you can't die by getting waterboarded, in fact it's arguably not torture.
I watched Steven Crowder get waterboarded on some Christmas special livestream he did with some ex military dude to prove that it's not as bad as Christopher Hitchens claimed it was.
honestly I doubt this could kill anyone, but a picture's worth a thousand words…


I watched it and I am surprised how you could claim it is not torture. It doesn't have to kill someone half the point is that it is non lethal and does not leave a mark.

how autistic do you have to be to think you can compare some buds on your YT doing it to and other situations.


I think I’m finally there. I feel a compulsion to die. It is dispassionate, and logical. I sit and look at the world, at the people, at my life and myself. I don’t see anything worth continuing. I’ve seen what I needed to see and done what I needed to do and now it’s time to go. I don’t know what lies beyond of anything, but I can say without any doubt that I simply need to not be here, wherever or whatever here is.

Hopefully I can go buy a gun in a timely manner.


I was de-facto waterboarded as a kid by having my face held down in snow that melted in such a way that I couldn’t breathe.
The reason it’s torture isn’t because you can’t breathe for X seconds. It’s because you don’t know if they’ll stop in time or not. Obviously doing it in a controlled environment where you know they’ll stop after X seconds won’t be that scary.


>I sit and look at the world, at the people, at my life and myself. I don’t see anything worth continuing.
This is like part one.
Part two is overcoming that survival instinct and going through with it. Good luck.

You might as well post info about what gun you decided and why for the thread.
> It’s because you don’t know if they’ll stop in time or not. Obviously doing it in a controlled environment where you know they’ll stop after X seconds won’t be that scary.
You would think the retards here would be able to tell being picked up and beaten and then waterboarded by your enemy is a little different than having your faggot buddies do it with a safe word/sign like in that video.


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My parents would have done me a service by ending me early. Why did I have to suffer for decades?


I think you've described the entire imageboard.


Where did you get your SN?


I had 10 Norco I got when I got my tooth pulled, but I used them to get high. I could have taken them all with some booze and just drifted off. I fuck up everything. I hate myself.


It's funny because I remember wanting to die when I was only a child. The feeling progressed severely when I was a teenager but it was always this edgy actively shitty feeling of despair and anger. Now that I'm older I still feel the same, however it's different. The edginess is no longer there, but instead there is a distinct dullness. I'm tired. I'm tired of life and its demands. I'm tired of being a loser and a reject, and I am 100% aware of my limitations.

The superman bravado of youth has worn off. The hopeful feeling of a possibly future has faded away. I have a better understanding of how the world works, and I know that I have no place in it. That edgy teen feeling of wanting to die has matured into a matter of fact destination. I no longer fear the end, because the reasons to stay around on this mortal plane are flickering out…one by one.


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I've already chosen a date to kill myself, one that has meaning to me, so I want to stick to it. Still, every day is just too much, and even though I'm already at my lowest point, life always finds a way to push me deeper, I'm breaking down, I can't stand feeling so sad all of the time, I can't even distract myself anymore, nothing works, I just feel so miserable.

How do you all cope? Does anyone have any advice on how to make my days more bearable before the date of my suicide finally comes to free me from all of this torment? I need something, anything.


>How do you all cope? Does anyone have any advice on how to make my days more bearable before the date of my suicide
abuse alcohol and drugs because what else is there to do?


Don't kill yourself try reaching out for help find someone, a close family, relative, hotline,aqquaintance anything that can stop you from feeling all depressed and suicidal. In the UK we have Samaritans, SANeline, national suicide prevention helpline, CALM (campaign against living miserably)
The Mix, switchboard if you identifty as gay or lgbt.

There are some lifelines in America,
Here is a link:


Alternatively you can use google to find one situtated in your own country such as canada or denmark


I also forgot to mention what is the underlying reason causing you to feel depressed?


Don't listen to this faggot, do what you have to do.
The reason is always the same.


I think it is the best method as well. I know many people who died of Heroin OD and it doesn't seem painful. They just drift off into sleep.


I have very limited access to these things because I live with my parents and they have little regard for my privacy, so if I try to sneak these things in they could come into my room without knocking and it'd be a pain to deal with that. I've managed to sneak alcohol in a few times, but I have a hard time drinking it, my resistance to its taste is very small, though it's also hard for me to get drunk, it's just not reliable sadly. Still, I appreciate the advice, anon.

I could write a book about everything that makes me depressed, in a way I already do, because I write a lot of my thoughts in my diary, which is also my main source of venting, because I feel bad when venting to other people, because I know everyone has their problems and I don't want to bother anyone, also I usually just feel worse when venting with others for some reason, so I won't get into detail.

The reason I made that first post is because the last few days in particular feel like a sick joke, I already wake up everyday feeling miserable by default, and my day to day life is insufferable to me, but Friday, Saturday and Today all had specific events, which I won't detail due to it being very personal, that managed to make it all even worse, and with all of it happening in succession I'm genuinely breaking down.

Every day, even though I try to have a little bit of hope that something good will happen, that it won't be unbearable, that maybe something will happen that will make me reconsider my decision to kill myself, every single day does the exact opposite, and has something happen to make me feel even worse, it's like a prank, a sick joke, and the only plus side is that it leaves me no doubt, I'm certain that I'm doing the right thing by ending my life.


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I don't quite know why, but "saviors" like this kind of piss me off. It just eminates this holier-than-thou self-righteousness combined with this incredible arrogance of "of course NOBODY would ever have a legitimate reason to commit suicide."


You should talk to a professional there are many people willing to help. By keeping yourself caged up all by yourself will leave you lonely and confused.


I am too afraid to fail, how to overcome and actually fucking do something about it?


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Is it better to use a slug or 00 buckshot to blow your brains out? Does it even matter?


You could try getting drunk or taking an anti-anxiety medication like benzos before you do it. What method were you planning on using?


Carefully prepare and setup your method until it has low enough probability of failure


The 1.7 minutes probably comes from the fact that some people are retards that do retarded shit like use birdshot or shoot themselves in the chin and blow their face off instead of blowing their brains out.


I have a retarded question, but I'm not sure where else to ask it.
Would a crossbow work for quitting? I'd assume you need a really high-power one or heavy one, but if you did it shotgun-style (in the mouth) would the odds be in your favor to quit? I know fuck all about bows in general, but know they're not regulated like guns are.


please dont try to crossbow yourself in the head wiz. I can see much going wrong with this


I'm honestly unsure if the bolt would manage to even pierce the skull fully. I've seen a single report of someone doing it successfully, which is why I asked.


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If I put a strong firecracker over a carotid artery by making a hole in a neck warmer and I detonate it would that make me bleed to death and kill me?


dont ask stupid questions.
I have read of this also and it does not seem like an ideal way of ending ones life.


It isn't a stupid question. This method seems like it has a high likelihood of working to me, but I could find very few cases of people that killed themselves using firecrackers or by cutting their carotid artery. That's why I asked.


Somebody asks this almost exact question every other thread. Crossbows are lethal, but you need to put distance between the bow and yourself to allow the bolt to build up inertia. Put the tip of the bolt up to a wall and pull the trigger and you'll have minimal penetration even if the bow was held stationary. Shoot the same wall from a few feet back and it could go right through. Think of the difference between punching a face and pushing on a face.

Crossbows kill animals by hindering movement of whatever vital organ the bolt penetrates, such as lungs or the heart. bolts aren't meant to bleed the animal out like a bullet would. There are niche tips and bolts that do allow blood the drain (for tracking game), but a healthy human blood will coagulate before enough drained. You'd bleed more from slitting your wrists.

Humans routinely survive large blades, nails, and wreckage lodged in their brain. You're a lot more likely to walk away in serious pain and with permanent brain damage if you shot yourself with a bow. You'd have to kill yourself he same way you'd kill game, by basically stapling your lungs together with the bolt so you couldn't breath. Unlike game though, humans are much less likely to die from pain shock, so your instincts could easily overpower your will and allow you to breath against the pain of the bolt. This is how cats, dogs, and raccoons can live fore weeks pieced by bolts.

an M80 is a quarter stick of dynamite, something designed to break mountains. There's a lot of power in one but you need to focus it properly. Having the cracker resting against your body without containing the blast energy from escaping outward will leave you with some burns and bruises. Even if you did get ahold of a powerful bomb and contained the blast on to one artery, the wound would be messy and singed, reducing bleeding.

If you want to explode your neck and can buy reloading equipment, an empty camp stove tank filled with black or smokeless powder could decapitate you.


I've heard many stories of people losing fingers because of firecrackers. If they can blow people's fingers off they can definitely cut an artery.


Almost all of the photos of hanged victims are barefooted, why is that, does it help or something


why would you put shoes on before killing yourself?


Are they Japanese?


In some weird cultures like USA they keep shoes on while inside and bring inside all the grime and dirt.


>In some weird cultures like USA they keep shoes on while inside and bring inside all the grime and dirt.
I grew up in America (parents are from overseas) and this still confuses the ever-loving shit out of me. We still use toilet paper, by the way, instead of the more sanitary and, IMO, comfortable bidet.


I thought this was only a thing on TV, because it's more convenient for them to keep their shoes on or not to be in socks or bare footed or whatever. I refuse to believe that any real person would do that.



I am american and we never wore shoes in the house unless people were over, then it felt like it would be kind of rude to ask them to remove their shoes so they just leave them on and my parents leave them on too, we dont have any place to remove shoes either so you have to bend over or sit on the floor while you take them off


how do you get the motivation to an hero.


I do the Mr.Rogers thing


Whenever I've had to go to someone's house, I asked if they wanted me to take my shoes off at the door and I recall most saying yes.


I'm Canadian. We never wear shoes inside, outside of slippers. Or if I'm helping family move.


always took my shoes off. No one wants people with shoes on walking around in their house.


I seriously don't understand this. It's such a small preventative thing that will help keep your place clean without having to clean every single week. Take off your goddamn shoes and don't bring food into your bed for fuck's sake.


>don't bring food into your bed for fuck's sake.
The benefits of eating in my bed versus not do not align. I am eating in my bed now.


Are you eating pizza?


Eating KFC satan. I use a big rectangle tub to eat out of to avoid leaving crumbs on the bed.


Bidets sound so unsanitary. So everyone has to grab the bidet with their shitty dirty hands to use it? that means the bidet needs to be sanitized a lot. thats just gross i'd rather use TP.


you should shower after you do your business.


I've been thinking about killing myself lately, unfortunately even though I don't even feel like a human being most of the time I still have the very human feel of fearing death, I don't think I feel death by itself (after all how can you fear something that involves your own non existence?) but I feel the process of dying, pulling the trigger, using the rope, jumping out of some building or in front of traffic, etc, I fear pain, I fear the thoughts and so.

Yet the logical part of my brain says "What if the process of killing yourself hurts? being alive will hurt so much more and for more time in the future, the spark of very intense pain during my death will actually save you more pain down the line".

I wish killing myself was a much simpler process, if I don't want to be here why I can't just get out in peace with some medicine? Why we can't take our own lives when we feel that it's not worth living anymore? This makes me sad but angry too, this isn't how it should be, I should have the right to end myself in a peaceful, dignified way.

Just some random thoughts, feel free to disregard all the shit I write.


No, there is nothing to disregard. That was a good post.

Everything you said is why I want euthanasia to be a legal choice.
Too bad my sadistic country would rather keep me alive for a century than allow me to escape this torture.

It's not that I'm even depressed. It's simply the fact the world is created for neurotypicals.

I have zero in common with their reality TV, artificial music, their loudmouth bragging, their compulsive obsession over the slightest wealth or mundane objects, their constant judging, racism, intolerance, hostility.

I just don't belong in that species. I only have the necessary human bodily functions to stay alive, but I have absolutely and utterly nothing in common with any of those humans.

It's torture to be alive for a century or longer in this state. It will always be 100% impossible to connect to anyone because they are simply not on the same wavelength mentally.
It's like trying to converse with a dog or pig who has some semblance of sentience and tries to put together simple words and sentences. It's a futile effort. They only "get" each other.

No matter how nice, considerate or fair I am to them, they treat me like an absolute alien.

Why can't doctors or pharmaceutical companies acknowledge this and allow us to escape, or at least spend considerable resources on medicines that allow us to completely turn off the part of our primitive brain that requires connection or interaction with others?



The main cause of death in autistic people unlike any other people in society is suicide.

Depending on the country the average lifespan of autistic people (note - men, not succubi) is 16 to 30 years lower than the general population, with most of those suicides happening between the ages of 27 to 35, and another spike at 50+.

People refuse to regard it as a lethal condition and just keep making fun of them. Imagine if people were making fun of cripples the same way, they would be ostracized.
But it's completely ok to do the same towards non-NT's. This is the species we live in.

It is lethal specifically because NT's hate non-NT's and exclude them from friendships, partnerships, jobs, everything. It is genocidal, hateful, spiteful behavior towards a group of people.


There's no social stigma against hate or violence against non neurotypicals because hate towards them is ingrained in the human psyche.

We are instinctively hated by people


Of course there's always this guy. I tried "reaching out for help" once and all I got were useless pills and a set of behavioural strategies to attempt to become a good wageslave and I was sent nack into the pit of despair. Thinking back, it really does confirm that modern society is full of robotic actors who only care about extending machinic culture. I can't find anyone who will support my dreams and I am too weak and uneducated - a fine gift I recieved from the public school institution and my commoner parents.

Sage for drunken rambling

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