Well, given the results of this thread so far, I guess I'm more alone than I thought and it's actually achieved the opposite of what I was looking for. No one here seems to be as obsessed/dysfunctional & I am at all, which is a good thing, I suppose, but I was still hoping there might be at least one person here who could relate with me & share the same mannerisms as myself, unappealing as they are.>>47162
Hmm, well kudos to that amount of self-control you seem to have, although it simply seems like you & I are just two very different individuals. Again, in my case, I chastise myself viciously for not doing more with the copious amounts of time I have on my hands, at least insofar as it relates to gaming.
>Even a tiny game might take me weeks to be done with it.
I can be pretty meticulous myself, at least when it comes to just about completing everything available in a given game, (like all the side-quests or whatever). Even still, I'm always rushing myself along trying to get the endpoint as soon as possible simply so I can move on to finish another game.
>I'm VERY finicky about the media I consume.
I'd like to say the same, but often I prove that not to be the case. Engorging myself with anything it is I can grab, with it sometimes being nothing more than mediocre trash in the end that I force myself to swallow down for the mere sake of finishing it. In that same sense, you could almost relate my habits to someone who has a poor diet, or is an otherwise obsessive eater. Instead of spacing out healthy "meals", or experiences, I just try to shovel in as much as I can & am then somehow surprised when I inevitably feel terrible, burnt out, and anhedonic as a result.
>I never play games if I'm bored or don't feel like doing anything. If I feel like not doing anything then I won't do anything.
A shame to say it, but I can't relate to this at all. Doing nothing, or next to nothing, (browsing the internet, posting on Wizchan, sleeping, etc.) always makes me uncomfortable, since I can feel each second being wasted & squandered away, when, ideally, it should have been put towards finishing a game, watching a movie, reading a manga, or otherwise consuming another piece of media that I could put under my proverbial belt. And yet almost everyday, instead of engaging in the latter like I wish I could, I almost always seem to stew in the former, viciously chastising myself on the inside all the while. Honestly, in a lot of ways, what I'd really love to have happen is to just embrace the nothingness, fully & completely, perhaps even permanently. To hell with everything else. Nope, I never played Morrowind, New Vegas, Quake, or Arcanum, and I never will. Oh well & who gives a shit. Alas, if only it were that simple.
>That's relative. I don't care what other people consider classics, for me there's only 2 types of games. Games I want to play and games I don't want to play. I play games I want to play.
That's quite a nonchalant & ambivalent attitude. Personally, I feel like I simply must
play certain games at some point, merely because they're otherwise well known, or acclaimed, and for no other reason than that.
I'm starting to think a lot of people here have essentially already dabbled with, or finished most of these "classic" games I'm referring to (like Quake, Morrowind, New Vegas, or whatever else), over these past 2 decades and I'm basically the only one here playing catch-up, or least feels like they need to play catch-up. Quite alienating, I must say.>>47164
>I would've rather been playing something else, but kept forcing myself to play because "oh all these other people think it's cool, I have to play it too".
Yeah, I experienced that quite a bit when I was playing STALKER: SoC for the first time. I pretty much just forced myself through it to the end for the exact reason you already indicated. Pretty sad, I guess, but I just felt like it was one of those games I simply had to finish
. That's not to say I hated every single second of it, since there were aspects of it that I actually really enjoyed (like the gunplay & atmosphere). It's just that, at the end of the day, if I'm being honest, I would've rather been playing something else. In the case of the STALKER series, I'd still like to try CoP someday, but I'm not sure when that will be, assuming I ever get around to it at all. The fact that I'm trying to force myself through CS first, isn't exactly helping the matter. You see, even CS, a game almost everybody agrees is the worst of the series and isn't exactly worth playing, I still feel obligated to play/finish, merely so I can "100%" the trilogy. As it is though, I'm not as overzealous when it comes to this sort of thing in particular. I might force myself to finish CS, or I might not. It's hard to say. Either way, I probably won't touch CoP until I do.
Anyway, feeling like I need to play/finish games that others have praised or "memed" excessively over the years is a trap I still find myself caught in, unfortunately. More often that not however, I actually tend to enjoy them on some level, so it's not always a slog, but there are other times when it certainly can be, which is a shame. Something like NecroVision being one of the more egregiously nauseating & mostly unfun things I've had to force myself through, as an example.
Hell, it even goes beyond this in a sense. For all my talk of never revisiting older games I've already finished, I'm actually doing that right now, in two separate instances. In my case, I feel like I simply must
replay both the original Nier & the bland as shit Shadow of fucking Mordor (which I didn't even like all that much the first time) before I play their respective sequels, as almost an obsessively inclined refresher of sorts. It's fucking insanely tortuous, but my OCD won't let it be. I simply have to do it.
I'm even planning to do the same thing when it comes to The Evil Within & its sequel. God, why did you do this to me? The Demiurge of cruel, indifferent DNA. Who can save me from myself?
>I've spent 10,000 or 11,000 hours total.
Triple, or perhaps even quadruple, that amount in my case. And yet, despite all that time, there's a literal mountain of games I haven't played yet. It truly boggles the mind, but just know that I'm a fucking expert at misprioritizing my time (just look at my last paragraph for evidence enough of that). Even now, on average, I still tend to play for at least 5+ hours, at least when I can manage to sit down and actually play something. Even if it's not a particularly thrilling game, I still tend to sit there & play for that long. The issue for me is consistency. Nowadays, I tend to game very irregularly. With there being gaps of 2 days, or more, between now & the last time I managed to play something. As far as I'm concerned, if I haven't played at least one thing in on any given day, I've essentially "failed" for that day. As a result, I've been "failing" a lot these last number of years, at least ever since the anhedonia & burnout kicked in that is.
>I end up feeling lost and unable to get back into it, because I forget story or gameplay details. Or I just don't feel invested in the game's narrative anymore. Then I get demotivated and just kind of drop it.
Yeah, that's understandable. I'm having a bit of a similar dilemma at the moment with Sekiro, since I haven't touched it for 3+ months now and am, at this point, reluctant to do so, due how to displaced I feel from the gameplay/narrative. I'd imagine I'll probably force to choke it down at some point though, since that's what I do.
Still though, am I the only one here who does these sorts of things? I mean, seriously? There's no one else here who does similar? No one? You're all this well adjusted? Christ on a cracker, I guess people like me really don't come here anymore. Autistic basketcases being a rare breed on Wizchan of all places. I can't say I'm truly surprised, but it's painful to be reminded of all the same.
Replies like this >>>/dep/205938 >>>/dep/206161 being what I was actually hoping for, mostly. Do people just not come to the fucking /games/ board, or something? Seems like /dep/ & /lounge/ are the only ones most users bother frequenting, which is frustrating.