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Disregard Females, Acquire Magic

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I don't know how strict rule 3 is and I don't know if this thread will be deleted, but I will give it a shot. What is your approach to and opinion on friendship? When I was in my teens I used to lie to myself and tell myself I was fine with having no friends, but as I got older I began to admit to myself that I was very lonely and that was what was causing my depression. What followed was a crab phase where I stopped avoiding people voluntarily and I tried to socialize as hard as I could. People where friendly towards me, but every time I asked them to play videogames, go eat sushi or do anything else together they were always "busy". Eventually I managed to make 2 friends online, but I still wanted something more, I still wanted something in person. After a while I stopped caring again and since I wasn't lonely anymore because of my online friends I was fine with my real life isolation. I never stopped trying though, I still push myself to talk to people, but the expectation of friendship isn't there anymore and I'm not bitter or sad about my lack of it either. How is your social life wizards?


>Eventually I managed to make 2 friends online
Every single time it's the same thing with you failed normalfags

Kill yourselves, friend-havers


Taking a risk on a ban here too. I had a few close friends up until the end of high school. They were mostly great friends and we shared hobbies. We would play games together on our DSs during lunch and stuff. I’m middle school I had friends I would play with on the Xbox but that friend group disintegrated as I moved to PC and people lost interest in console gaming and generally grew apart. I never found it too hard to make friends as a kid because I could just ask if they also play X and if they did we’d quickly bond over it. And some people just kinda decided to be my friend, but those people were never very good friends. After high school though I went to college and could hardly make an acquaintance. I was a real cynical person after high school and just didn’t want to interact with people, and they didn’t want to interact with me either. I tried joining a few clubs, but the hobby ones just had (forgive my use of the term) the cringiest people and I couldn’t relate to them. I joined some project based clubs (for example one was about building a human powered submarine) and while the people there were far more tolerable at the end of the day many of them were just doing it for the networking and to put it on a resume. It just felt like work instead of a hobby. So I ended up quitting all my clubs by the second year. I never really needed help studying, and while I was asked and did provide some help for others, they never wanted to hang out and classes moved too fast for me to make any bonds anyway. I couldn’t form a friend in the few months before the whole class was different people. And the few people I did routinely see around my classes and laboratory just didn’t share any interest with me on any level. Now I have a job and it’s mostly the same, my coworkers are agreeable people but I just don’t really have any common ground with them and would rather just go home after work than hang out.

Luckily I still talk to some of my middle and high school friends. My middle school friends still play some games with me so I’ve been able to keep the relationships going. My high school friends never play games with me just because they hardly play any themselves now. I moved away from home for college and now work, and so did most of them so both my online and in person interactions with them are sparse. On the rare occasion I do go home they always invite me to normalfag things like bars, but sometimes they will do something more fun like watch a movie or go bowling so I try to attend those as much as I can because I’m afraid if I don’t the friendship will whither and we’ll end up just drifting further apart.

I’ve never been able to make friends entirely online. All my online friends I met in person and they simply moved away. I just can’t open up to people over the internet. And I clearly can’t open up to people IRL anymore so I’m trying to preserve the friends I have.


>What is your approach to and opinion on friendship?
You must have interests and principles, then meet people on those grounds.
You cannot be willy-nilly friends with people.
I mean, you can try, but it'll never work out.
Figure out what you want from the world and what you enjoy on your own, and only then can you be a failed friend-heaver normalfag, in the words of >>188501

I don't have any friends myself, since it's hard to find a reason to subsist almost vampiric relationships.
IM is cancer, btw. If you use IM I only feel bad for you


online friends aren't real friends lol. they will never be integrated into your life as much as someone you have spent time physically around would be (and with the increasing prevalence of online interaction even for normalfags, even face-to-face "friendship" has become a lot more casual). either you don't check the most important boxes to be a robot/wizard because you aren't one of those or you are wasting your time trying to be semi-normal when it just won't work. i also wouldn't consider being around students with similar dispositions, hobbies or social standing as friends. some people can't stand being a loose end on their own and there are empty seats next to you at lunch or during class. it's only done out of necessity since everyone is forced to be at school anyway.


I thought I wanted a friend or two until 24 or so when after thinking about it really hard I realized that friends arent like in anime, and so it's not really good to have friends, at least me I couldn't handle it. The most I can do is online text chat through steam or something with someone else who is 25+ shutin loser like me

>online friends aren't real friends lol. they will never be integrated into your life as much as someone you have spent time physically around would be
I spend 12 or more hours a day at my pc, online people are much more real to me than anyone in 'real' life


i don't care much about it. sometimes it can be fun to shoot the shit with someone, but the continual obligation to talk and interact with them just makes me feel uneasy.

i wish i could have friends where i just talk to them once a month for like a couple hours then they dont hear from me for a while, but people lose interest quickly and they're usually looking for the perfect soulmate friend that will save them or give their life meaning. so they'll ghost you if you don't care about watching some moe anime that really speaks to them or you have different political beliefs or you don't use FOSS software.

i don't even like "gaming" friends cuz they invite you to play with them and you dont feel like it and they always want to voice chat with you instead of focus on the game, so i just dont add people cuz it turns into a fucking job for me.

i like imageboards and random discord servers where i just shitpost for a couple hours, i really hate 1-on-1 interaction of any kind.


it doesn't matter how much time you spend at the computer or that game or messenger services refer to it as a "friends list." friends are people that still get together long after high school and university are over. one day you could fall out with them and you can be out of their lives entirely with a couple clicks.


>one day you could fall out with them and you can be out of their lives entirely with a couple clicks.
That's why you keep a small document of information about them so you can stalk them until they add you back, that's what a real online friend would do


Adding on my opinion of friendship.

The hardest part for me about friends is that at the end of the day I don't care about people. I hate talking about relationships. I don't care that your mother's aunt died, or that your nephew won the baseball tournament. Friends are there for the utilitarian purpose of mutual entertainment 90% of the time. I've never felt close enough to any of my friends (or any other living person), even my closest ones, to express my true inner thoughts to them. The closest I ever got was talking to one of my friends about succubi, and I told him that I think somewhere deep down I just truly hate them. He of course wants girlfriends but he was somewhat understanding of me, but either way I felt that I had revealed too much and never did so again. I hardly talk to them about politics or deeper philosophy. On some level I am just deathly afraid of saying the wrong thing and being shunned so I never bring up those topics and avoid them in conversation. I only enjoy the company of other people when I'm playing a video game or can talk to them about an anime. It has to be disconnected from people and focused on objects and subjects.


>Friends are there for the utilitarian purpose of mutual entertainment 90% of the time.

I feel like this is something someone with schizoid personality disorder or maybe autism would write. Friendship is more about emotional connection and empathy. It's not an act you put on for some kind of benefit. Unless you're a literal sociopath or you're on the autism spectrum and don't connect with people.

>online friends aren't real friends lol.

I don't agree with this. If people can fall in love over the Internet then surely you can make a simple friend online. You might never meet a person but that doesn't mean its not real. Especially since there are tools that let you call someone if you wanted to get even more personal. It seems like its plenty real. Why else would you get people spending hours in chat rooms and on places like Discord? It's definitely helping them feel connected.


What can I say, I just don’t care about other people. I can’t bear social situations unless there’s an activity to keep me occupied. I have empathy and sympathy but I’m just too defensive to form real connections.


It's okay wizzie, take care of yourself as best you can. If you feel like it you could try talk to people with common interests online. This life is lonely and stressful, I would say friends would help most peoples mental health if they're not like schizoids and don't need friends.


At best people are indifferent to me, at worst they abhor and detest me. It doesn't matter whether it's online or offline. It doesn't matter what "approach" I take to socializing when it all inevitably fails. Dying alone is a foregone conclusion at this point. This realization slowly becomes more bearable over the years, but it absolutely crushed me during my late teens and early twenties.

What's funny is when I find a "welcoming" group of so-called "outcasts" on some chatroom and it's always occupied by a tight-knit clique. It's even funnier when some new guy joins after me and quickly integrates into the circle. Really hilarious.


>online friends
Those are not real friends, they can ghost you or dissapear any second, that's how people are.


normalfags dont like losers so i dont have friends


Eating sushi and playing vidcons / talking about wiz shit and hopefully smoking some wiz approved weed sounds really fun.


i prefer this, anonymous messages left on an imageboard, over any sort of personal connection or communication online. in person im fine alone. i dont get enough out of friendships, like i put too much effort in and i get disappointed they dont match my effort, thats how i remember all my friendships as a kid and when i was young. it is possible i simply never found a good friend. it is undeniable however that im fine being alone now, if you cant be at peace by yourself and love yourself you are just reliant on other people to live


>online friends aren't real friends lol. they will never be integrated into your life as much as someone you have spent time physically around would be
Perhaps. One of my online friendships is kind of casual, we just play games together. I'm really close with my other online friend however. We know everything about each other, we even know each others real names and where we live. I don't know how an irl friendship could be closer than the one I have with him, but even if it could be I don't really care. My friendship with him is enough for me to not feel lonely.
We have gone months without talking because either me or them were busy with real life or simply bored with each other, but they haven't ghosted me yet. I hope that never happens, I care a lot about them. If it happens I'll just be sad about it for a while then move on and look for new people I guess.
Yeah, it sounds really fun. Right now I can only play games, watch series, voice chat and video chat with my friends because they're all online. I like visiting cool places and eating at restaurants quite a lot though and I'd like to have some people to do that with.
>it is undeniable however that im fine being alone now
If this is true and not a coping mechanism I'm really happy for you and envious of you wizzie. I always feel lonely when completely alone no matter how much I tell myself I'm not.


All my irl life who i thought were my friends left me many years ago, the ones i did online betrayed me. I guess im just meant to live and die by myself


feeling connected and being connected are two different things. chatting online doesn't have to be deeper or more committal than satisfying a need for socialization. you could say that's what we are doing right now by using imageboards.
the vast majority of people still dont do long distance dating. they might meet over some app, but they generally live in close proximity. probably because love is just as shallow as friendship. most of the time people just want to hump like bunnies.


1. i don't know why you suddenly brought up online dating
2. the whole point of dating and getting a girlfriend is to have sex, otherwise you would just get a normal friend. So no shit long distance relationships don't work.


Ah I didn't see that. my mistake.


it's ok, still replied grumpier than i should have


if thats how people are, then that also applies to real life friends as well. i assume most irl friends are made through convenience (through work or school) and then when that job or whatever ends they disappear, like an online friend who you might play games with, who stops playing the game, so you lose contact. either of these could be considered "not real" friends, as they were just relationships of convenience.

i think the difference between surface level friendships and deep meaningful friendships is:
1) the time spent bonding (over mutual interests or activities etc)
2) the willingness of both parties (symbiotic relationship)

this might then elevate it to an actual friendship in which both parties make time for the other and real camaraderie and "love" can develop. however being extremely cynical i think even in these next level friendships theres still a hefty degree of providing perceived value to the other person, even if its just shared time playing games or whatever, if that stopped, they might not ghost you but they would probably disappear, even if you think youre an empathetic person, you would probably also do the same. however i would like to believe that over time real affection would develop and that wouldnt happen, but that would depend entirely on the person and might only exist in chinese cartoons.

anyway i dont know, i think the ultimatum with any relationship is the symbiotic nature of it, if both people are getting something out of it (enjoy doing stuff together, enjoy talking) the relationship might turn into a friendship, which might grow and develop into something more enduring, if not, it wont, itll revert, and wilt off and die. simple as that really.


I've had too many online friends just disappear on me. Not block me, just vanish. I get that people move on but so often it happens without even a word of goodbye, never to log in again. It fucking hurts, especially when you can go back and view all your conversations from a decade ago.


Actively avoid people because I hate myself and don't wish to burden people with my negativity and presence.
Friendship is a simple formula of repeated unplanned interactions and how adept a person is at becoming a person the other needs you to be. The key to becoming that person is to make the other feel like you have a connection even if none exists. Doing stupid things like having a nickname for them breeds a familiarity which they mistake for intimacy. Unnecessary physical contact, whether a member of the opposite sex or not, is also very effective.
As the saying goes if you can fake sincerity you have it made and the easiest way to do this is by by always telling the truth but never being honest. If you just do those simple things eventually even if you are bad at socialising at the beginning like any other thing you will improve with practice. You don't even need to pursue other people as the vast majority, especially men, are as crippling lonely as you are.


Friendship is transactional. I make you laugh and am nice to you and you like me. I get social stimulation out of hanging out with you. Maybe one day I have a stroke, become retarded and I can't entertain you like I used to, and you stay around out of a sense of debt and guilt. Eventually you'll feel that debt is paid in full and off you go. Who could blame you? Not me. That's how relationships work, no matter how you romanticize it.


I have done this to people. I don't know how else to end the 'online friendship' when I don't feel like talking to them anymore. Typically I feel bad about ignoring them, then they get angry and it's so awkward to come back and begin that confrontation that i keep putting it off day by day until it's been a year before i even realise it. Similar situation with my family since i moved away from them


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Man, you reminded me of my teen years.
I know I will be branded a failed normalfag sinner, but cynicism mixed with some big fails drugged and slaughtered my agreeability, which is fundamental for building connections.

I never had problems making friends in high school either until I stopped to really think about the nature of relationships and get jinxed by it. I became more and more disinterested in relationships until I finally gave up the notion of "real friends".

Of course, I've been so long in this pit that I lost all the normal subtle mannerisms of interaction, to the point that interacting with me nowadays gives people uncanny valley feelings. I.e. I give "weird vibes".

Not sure if there's redemption for me or if I even want it, but I will definitely seek therapy once I have the means, only so that I can live alone without doubts that I'm doing the right thing.

Ok, you crabs can ban me now.
Wish hope to you all.


Screencapped, i don't understand why social interaction with normies are forbidden to tell here, one has to interact with them eventually, and i am fairly sure that the kind of individuals that lurk this places, by nature, avoid them.
Social interaction is important, see what we are doing here.


> i don't understand why social interaction with normies are forbidden to tell here
I think it’s mostly cause no one really wants to hear about it.


If wizards come here to tell social interactions with normies it is surely because that anecdote is useful


The same stuff happened to me, i hope i can learn normal body language again.


The only period in my life where I had friends was late elementary-early middle school, and it was the most insecure period of my life, where I felt worthless and tried to be someone I wasn't to impress assholes I didn't care about, who eventually abandoned me and found some other toy when I didn't act like a fool anymore. Even close family members abandoned me, besides one of my cousins who I consider my only "friend". A friend to me, should be someone that wouldn't judge you no matter what; someone you can tell anything to no matter what. For all the 'wizards' in this thread with healthy social circles, can you really say your friends know who you really are? Do they know you post on this site? Are they aware of the opinions you express here? Ask yourselves this before considering them your "friends".


No approach, it feels superficial.
There was no form of attachment or comradery or whatever you want to call it. It also did not help that I live in a heavily social society and was forced to go through the slightest social interaction. They all went away as quickly as they came. Same thing with Online "friends"


I think that you can only truly call someone a friend if they have experienced the worst you can be AND still are willing to freely make sacrifices for your sake.
Anything less than it is just acquaintances or networking.


>What is your approach to and opinion on friendship?
Never had any irl. I was always rock bottom of any social hierarchy, a real undesirable. Even the geeks in the Chess and Warhammer clubs didn't want me around.

I used to chat with people on MSN and Skype but I wouldn't call any of those people friends, can't remember any of them. I stopped doing this around the time when Discord became popular, I felt too old and couldn't relate to the zoomer generation.


I find other people painfully boring. No irl relationship in my life has ever given me the satisfaction and contempt comparable to online friendships or even just talking shit on image boards. This is probably most prevalent in my teen years where I didn't actively try to avoid others and hadn't accepted that I was lonely.

As a teenager, in classes, I would talk to classmates beside me to pass time. The talks were always shallow and barely stimulating. I had found it hard to relate to others at times. I found myself increasingly frustrated and bored no matter who I spoke to or what we spoke about.

To gain a reaction or create some excitement in these talks, I would purposefully say shocking and excessively disturbing things (Mostly phrases/stories I found on 4chan). I would get more and more extreme no matter what. I mistook peoples disgust and shock for 'friendship'. People just ended up thinking I was weird and I ended up creating a lot of rumors about myself lol.

I ended up with no friends because everyone thought I was some weird schizo. I look back now and I realize I really should've kept my mouth shut, but I was a lonely and very attention starved kid. I did not have any real friends and thought the image board culture was something you could replicate in real life. Fucking idiot.

TLDR: Image boards ruined my life


I have no friends exactly because they know me better than myself


In social interactions, people always made me feel like I was an option aka the 3rd wheel.
I have no friends at 27, neither IRL nor online.

Usually, normals don't want to hang out with losers or what they identify as the bottom of the barrel. In fear that you will infect them with the low social status plague.


Problem is failed normalfaggots invade every cesspool of the internet until you no longer feel you're in good company. You go from talking about friends then the discussions about gfs come up. I come to wizchan out of neccessity. You're better off going to /r9k/ or /soc/.


I try to make friends online but its very hard for me to keep up, even with other wizards I have to put up a mask otherwise they'll quickly realize I'm extremely annoying, and also this mask is extremely tiring for me. So I am either exhausting myself with a restrained personality, or annoying everyone around me. It's a lose any way I go.


> it is possible i simply never found a good friend
Of course, some people grow up in better enviroments than others.


Why do you perceive yourself to be annoying? I consider myself annoying, too, but don't do much to moderate my behavior.


non-existant because i can't give anyone a good time, best i can do to a groid is serving as an emotional tampon or be idle in their presence; whenever i interact with anyone i make my best to be as brief as possible so as to take the least time possible from them
chad uncle tried and something sparked, he had to actively carry the conversation though; plenty of people did good things (big part is because they like my parents) to me and im unable to reciprocate and that sucks


>because i can't give anyone a good time
I always wondered how do normals like each others company. I get often told that i am boring, that's probably why i don't have friends.
How to make an interaction enjoyable is an arcane knowledge for me.


i seriously don't feel any need for friendship at all, last time i had a serious friendship was in middleschool, and i also don't talk to anyone except my father who i talk like once or twice a month
i don't even have a single online friend and i'm completely fine with it


Don't have any. I had a bunch of friends when I was young and was a quasi-normalfag. As I got older friendships ended and I never managed to replace them with new ones. It seems that most adults do not make friends outside of work, or through already existing friend groups. I don't mind being alone, as I've grown used it, but being alone also doesn't bring me great happiness. It's just normal for me, not something I often think about.


I don't like being alone either.


man we are very similar. i also don't like gaming friends because people just waste time and do things that you don't want to do. i like playing the game my own way.

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