In summation, there are so many things I want to do, that I am doing nothing. I've spent multiple hours today just looking at the wall wondering what I should do.
I'm mostly numb. I'm finding more and more as time goes on that things I've claimed to enjoy have just been lies I've told to maintain a veneer of normalcy.
I realized the other day that I don't actually enjoy food, I've just normally answer with a "yeah sure" when asked if I enjoyed it but that I really couldn't give a shit unless it was actively nauseating.
Overall pretty good.
The worse thing I am currently dealing with is I finally figured out what is the cause of my hair breaking off so badly. That I lost a lot of lenth in my hair and beard, and it will take years to grow what I lost back.
All because I tried out a new hair hair product that smelt nice and rinsed really clean.
Now I have to fuck around with conditioner and oils to baby my hair into durability, then let it grow for the next 4 or so years just to get back to where I was a few months before.
I am very pissed at myself and the company that though such a product is fit for humans.
I'm almost entirely detached from my life. I don't enjoy very many things anymore, mostly when I spontaneously decide to indulge in junk good but even then it's just in the first couple of moments when the dopamine hits and I feel like shit almost immediately after. I also enjoy sleeping a lot more, or perhaps I'm just more tired than I used to be. Before I couldn't stand being in bed for too long, sleep was kind of just a necessity, now I could stay in bed all day drifting in and out of consciousness and be perfectly content. I don't know where this is going, unless I experience some kind of radical chance I will just become a husk biding my time until I don't have to exist anymore.
lots of negative things coming my way while zero of the positive things to counter balance that
im sure i will snap against someone eventually
>>185443>Did you do anything fun recently
I started painting and apparently making some improvements. The happy hormones are however nowhere to be found. Why I am commenting however is because of your picture. I was watching some tutorial about painting stones where I had one of that 3dpds vids in my rec, something about "5 unconcious things you do to make people avoid you". I had some good laughs there! "You might be negative. People dont like negativity so be positiv!" - "You're ignored because you have a low presence. Be confident!". Real funny shit. The best part were the comments "I had anxiety and 0 friends 1 year before but now I have tons of friends!". At this point all I can do is laugh. Is this how medieval serfs felt like when someone said you can grasp the stars? Its not like we live in different worlds than ordinaries but are dimensions apart.
Atleast I dont get mad/sad about these things anymore so its a plus?
it's fucking terrible. Just when i start feeling like i have a grip on things reality comes nd kicks me in the teeth.
I just want to die. I don't have the energy necessary to continue living.
realizing everyday how theres literally no point to anything. being alive is so fucked up why are people still having kids
I'm so fucked that I can't even post about it here, I'm trying not to think too much about it.
Switched shampoos and got a leave in conditioner.
The breakage appears to have stopped.
Only thing I can do now is wait for my hair to grow back.
Really fucked up my beard too.
also found out they passed that banking bill where they can watch your accounts if you have $600 bucks in it.
When I come to this website it means that life is not good. I remember about this place in my worst moments.
It's neutral. Neither happy nor sad, but I guess that means it's sad since life sucks when you are not happy. I have found some interesting stuff I want to do, like learning how to draw, maybe learning 3D modelling, programming old computers, but then I ask myself: "why? I'll just waste my time, give up sometime later and wonder why I even started/stopped doing it".
I hope I die soon. That would be so lit.
Agreed. For me it may not be a case of hitting rock bottom, but simply realizing there was nothing but air under my feet.
Me too, I just hope it's quick. Quick would be dope.
Going to get a job soon, so I'll finally have money to spend on my hobbies.
Dropped uni a couple of years ago, been wageslaving ever since but im sick of it.
I kinda want to try uni again but I just dont know what to do. It frustrates me how easily normos go over this shit while im 30 and still struggling.
I live for telling people about NZ's covid stats to piss off nationalists in my own country.
same i fucking hate norms. they literally know its shitty but do it anyway cuz they want to fit in so bad and be a normie. fucking losers.
>>185641>normies wageslave cause they love being normies and want to fit in
I thought they did so they don't starve. Nice angsty insight you got there
Hello fellow wizard, thanks for asking. Well life is not going too bad, finished uni, found related job at walking distance,also part-time so i also have time for my projects, property home, savings increase… Almost 40.Wish all of you best of luck.
I'm completely alone and can't muster the energy or drive to do much of anything but overall things aren't too bad.
I'm becoming incapable of communication with most people, especially people on our very crabchan 2022
Trying to climb out of the cave, seeing some light, don't you want to see the Sun too? No, no, no, you know nothing!
I'm not a wizard yet, but getting there lol. Overall, I feel fine, I am neither happy nor sad. Been turning to religion again. Kind of a cope, but theosis sounds pretty good right now. I just don't know if it is true.
Recently turned 30 and the happiest i've ever been. All my teenage years and 20s were so horrific, I barely avoided suicide, but now I turned it around in the last 1-2 years, through pure luck and risk taking basically. I don't wish to state the details on a public forum.
I still have severe social anxiety issues, and my family are upset that I cut them out of my life so they are guilt tripping me. But I can accept that and I can't believe how much better things are now.
I used to think there was no way out and was ready to die. Sometimes miraculous things can happen. On the other hand, I'm skeptical that this is a good thing to say to suicidal people, because statistically I was very lucky. I suppose people who are stuck in a horrific life should be encouraged to take risks to try to break out of it.
Good image and description. It seems nihilism has taken up you.
Anyway, about me.
I've recently (re)discovered wizchan and how profound are conversations here compared to other chans I've visited. I did it because I'm hungry for conversations that feel real. Most of the times here in Brazil (and maybe in other parts of the world) you end up having shallow conversations about things. Maybe you are not talking to real people, but animals, hungry ghosts, demons and other metaphorical (or literal) beings like that. Don't know how to summarize what I'm doing right now, but I can sure say that I'm looking for food for my soul as I get out of 2020 season 3 with renewed strenght.
I'm also a furry and a buddhist. I won't let the state of affairs of this world drag me down like an animal or cattle. I'll fight to the very end. I'm a wolf. I'll detach from time and reborn into eternity.
It’s just a meme the mods enforce to emasculate and desecrate the legacy of the site.
>How are you doing?
>Thinly veiled humblebrag thread
It's amazing how similar this place is to reddit sometimes.
Half the replies are saying they hate their life, shut up retard.
I'm not happy but I'm not sad. I'm mostly just tired, and because I'm so tired I just do low effort things on the internet all day. It's really not bad living like this. By most standards throughout history I am living even better than a king. Do I wish sometimes that I wasn't so tired all the time and could do things that were productive? Yeah, sure, but not being able to isn't going to make me want to kill myself like I did when I was younger.
All I need to be happy is money, but I'm too stupid and ugly to make it.
life feel like shit lately
lost my dreams
lost my hope
honestly feel like living dead bored.life is just getting bored and bored.I had few friends but now they all just moving on to because of money,job,girlfriend.honestly wish i could spend some time in irl but it just become so fucking sad and boring i just don't want to do anything irl.
Due to complications with a surgery that removed a cyst in my back last year, I've been half a year without being able to weight lifts or practice martial arts.
The most important things in my life that gave me motivation and an advantage over the normgroids.
These last months I have had no way to release stress, and resorted to masturbation and alcohol to cope with this boredom. I spend my days bored and without motivation to do anything. The wound is supposed to heal soon but I don't know much more I will resist like this
>>188416> weight lifts or practice martial arts> most important things in my life that gave me motivation and an advantage over the normgroids
where do you live that you have to train and fight normgroids, a kung fu movie?
You never know when you can become the ridicule of others so you better be prepared
even then you can just walk away. no insult is worth getting brain damage or assault charges.
Why wizards so sad?? We got 99 problems but a bitch ain’t one. Just take it easy and roll with the punches wizbros.>>188417
I can barely leave my room.
don't get into fights. If they insult you you insult them back but a fight is another thing. You never know the outcome. Best thing you can do is run away.
nmormalfags are not worth your time or attention
I don't know man, just got this adrenaline rush from the thought of fucking up some cancerous trend-following normalfag and humiliate him in front of his succubi.
Especially if it's someone who has insulted me, rejected me or ignored me in the past
I was recently diagnosed with ADHD and given a low dose of stimulants to try. I can say its making a very profound difference in my life so far. It gives me substantially more energy and I'm able to focus for much of the work day.
It's amazing how fucked up I am off this medication. I can't follow conversations, I can't start work, I can't finish anything. If I had access to this drug when I was younger it would have really really helped me. It makes me sad to think how much I've missed out on because of my illness. But I am looking forwards and feeling very positive wizzie.
That's how I feel with low doses of opiates, benzos and stimulants. Perhaps anything that makes me feel less shit and eases anxiety makes me able to function and follow conversations etc. But I could never get those from a doctor.
It's great that you got a prescription and it's helping you so much, better late than never
Getting a prescription for ADHD meds is like the most ADHD-unfriendly process possible. I think it took me like 5 months of waiting for my useless doctor to do anything and even now my dose only really works when I combine it with huge amounts of caffeine. It's better than nothing, I definitely appreciate it. I hope you are able to get some good medication soon, wizzie.
I feel for you guys. So many people with ADHD had their lives ruined mostly by normies who abused the drugs and made doctors skeptical. For every drug addicted normie they deny they probably denied two other people who really could have used the help.
My life could be going okay, my parents love me but all I do is hurt them.
I want to die and I don't want to make an effort.
How do I get my parents to finally reject me so I can kill myself?
Be nice to your parents.
In my case, they are the only persons who genuinely care about me and i'm grateful for that.
When they'll die, the realy loneliness struggle will begin.
I'm happy with myself. I can discern no problems with my mentality or psyche, but it's known that life involves both the individual and the world around them, and the external world I exist in is horrible. It seems everything I have any sort of interest or investment in is ruined or subverted by others. So even when I can confide in myself, it's hard to be completely happy when my surroundings are so insipid and needlessly destructive.
I will pray for you that you get them, wiz.
Wiz from Russia here.
Well, everything goes to total shit in my life.
I'm seriously considering working as janitor.
Life or death from starvation situation.
I had a job that I held for a month.
I am continuing my therapy, and feeling dissapointed it is not working.
I am sad about how badly I traded crypto when I could have made good money.
Lack of anything is making me want to kill myself but I'm getting daydreams and optimism back.
I had a wank today and I am really ashamed of myself
If you don’t mind me asking, how has life changed for you since the Ukraine situation?
>>188991>how has life changed for you
Not much for now but I can see where this is going. Right to the Hell.
In Russia we don't have almost any good which is not imported or semi-imported. Even machinery which we use to get our precious oil is imported.
When summer comes there will be total deficit of goods for sure.
I'm considering getting a job of janitor for 21K rubles. It's near 205$ for months.
I hope not to die from starvation.
another 1 and done facebook tier OP that people responded to for some reason lol.
Janitor doesn't sound so bad. Just get some headphones and listen to podcasts or audiobooks while you work. No more copywrite laws means you can legally pirate anything you want.
you have to stand all day long which sucks
You are actually walking/moving around so it really isn't all that bad on the feet in comfy shoes.
its not bad. just do it for a school system you get a pension good pay benefits etc. might be my career since i have experience my dad ran a janitorial company.
im anxiously waiting for my first paycheck so i can leave my mom behind for good
Hah, good luck finding a janitor position that has any benefits in the current age.
Good luck on getting your own place.
But don't sever ties with your mom, mothers are nice.
I wouldn't want to cut ties with mine for sure.
I got on disability recently in supposedly the hardest state (Im in usa) to get disability in and I didnt even need a lawyer, I don't know if that means its going good or if I'm really mentally screwed up and don't know it
Hello! I'm fine. I'm going to work right now, but I don't mind working on Sundays since I don't work that much throughout the week. It's a good weekend for me.
>>189271>But don't sever ties with your mom, SOME mothers are nice.
Its awful but at the same time I realized that as long as I live in this fucked up dystopian world I can't really be happy, only comfortable.
But I still consider suicide sometimes, after all the 10 minutes of so of physical suffering before dying would be the equivalent of a month or so of mental suffering, so I guess the trade-off is worth it,
What kind of disability benefits are u anons on? Can't get any NEETbux in my shithole.
I'm currently living in a mental health rehabilitation facility. I don't really talk to the other residents. I get to see my sister and my dad often. The thing that gives me my happiness and joy is my belief in God and Jesus Christ.