No.307023
This is the classic "Suicide General", where we discuss methods and say farewell to our fellow wizards.
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>>296511 No.307030
do you guys have any suifuel ("suicide fuel") resources that you like to browse? shit that completely demoralizes you and activates that self-destruct urge inside you. i need something to push me off the edge…
this is a good example >>307028
pendatic retards like these ruin every community and make me question what's the point of even coming here. but it's not enough to reach for the rope quite yet.
No.307034
>>307030ironically whenever i want to remember why i'm suicidal i either browse imageboards or talk to people elsewhere. i don't often do the latter though, i don't like real people
No.307043
>>307030I don't browse the internet for this but I go over certain things inside of my head.
Imagining my life if I could have done the things I wanted to.
Thinking about how boring and repulsive my life is.
Realising always more pain is coming and you can just shut the pain impulse off forever by hanging myself.
I really think I am close to leaving now.
No.307072
>>307024>>307026>>307028>>307047Can you faggots please talk about suicide. Nobody fucking cares about a homura fanart.
>>307023Yes, I want to kill myself. The future scares me. I do what I can in the present without focusing on the future, but after shedding my ego, my greatest fear is witnessing the total failure of my nature in aligning with reality. To be in my natural state, and see catastrophic failure. I can't handle it. I hope MAID becomes legal. I want to be euthanized.
No.307078
>>307024>>307028>>307033OP here. So basically you guys are saying you like 2D but as soon as it is used to express any sentiment it makes you a faggot. So for example making a post expressing confusion or asking questions accompanied by a confused anime succ with a question mark makes you a total faggot.
This isn't the outcast/NEET culture I've known, and I should look for a different place.
>>307072I don't like euthanasia, dying in a hospital bed surrounded by white coats, I plan on hanging myself.
No.307118
this one nitpicking ragebaiting manly man troll has been ruining this imageboard for the past few years
he latches onto details that don't fit into his idea of wizchan, and derails threads, stirring up pointless arguments about what's manly and what's crabby
might be the time to pull the plug on this shithole
No.307121
Stop derailing the thread. Further thread derailment will result in a ban.
No.307122
my sn was confiscated
No.307124
>>307030Isn't existence itself reason enough to push you off the edge? Merely walking outside and taking in the vulgarity and decadence that engulfs everything is a strong enough reminder that I am not suited for this world… and maybe that's alright. It's part of nature I suppose (natural selection?) I just can't even begin to imagine myself enacting the role of a functioning adult, with an office job and a social circle etc. I don't require any further reason for a premature death.
No.307125
>>307124actually, sadly no. when i'm in my room and i'm not thinking about the painful parts of reality, and i'm distracted or engaged with a good thread, anime, game, video etc. i still want to live. i'm curious about what will happen in the future and there are still things that i enjoy.
when i want to get into that complete suicidal state, i have to actively seek it out. sometimes i go to r/foreveralone and just reading the titles of the threads gives me that pit in my stomach. other times i see 3dpd porn and it makes me feel disgusted with my body and my lack of normalcy. sometimes i re-read theodore millon's psychological description of the avoidant personality disorder and it makes that pit in my stomach hurt a lot. then i can always remember any memory of social interaction in my life and it immediately makes me want to rope.
maybe if i can stack enough of these together, i can make it pass the threshold. the problem with life is that it's still possible to become comfortable or harbor delusion hope in the future.
No.307129
>>307124>Merely walking outside and taking in the vulgarity and decadence that engulfs everything is a strong enough To a certain degree i agree, but the core must be seperated from the additional layer here. The world is not the problem by your own framework. Existence is the base state, the decay of it is something additional, not the core nature. Still, the amount of effort it will take to fix all that is not worth it and I have given up. I wish to enjoy my life with little few things I can get here tand there, and small joy of life.
No.307140
>>307136I'm fairly confident it's Asagiri Aya from Mahou Shoujo Site.
No.307151
>>307122Disgusting how normies try to prevent us from leaving.
>>307124I always imagined I could improve my life to something livable. Now I am close to the end I started thinking a little bit like this, having a body is disgusting, gathering resources is a chore, life is not for me on a fundamental level. I don't believe in natural selection. Good luck wizanon.
>>307125>make it pass the tresholdYes, I can barely believe how long I put up with my suffering and kept trying. What put me past the treshold: a life which would make me want to live is never coming and I might as well leave.
No.307157
i got a reliable method but now i'm terrified of death, so i guess i'm stuck here rotting until the terror of the 3d world becomes much worse than the terror of death
No.307164
im noguns and no way to get them what is an easy and reliable method i was thinking about getting fentanyl from a street nigger and going out that way because i cant into hanging and am afraid of being a vegetable. eating 50 fake fent laced xanaxes should do me in quick huh
No.307167
drowning is my best option. here's my plan:
i am going to steal a boat, numb myself with benzos and then i am going to drill a small hole in my boat.
No.307170
if you arent in pain, why rush to death?
You have an eternity to be dead later, why the hurry?
No.307171
>>307170nothingness seems better than this
No.307173
>>307170because pain is always around the corner. it's even worse when you know a specific humiliation is lined up and you can't even concentrate on anything else while the days count down.
No.307189
nothing will happen. i've tried for a decade to make something happen, nothing has ever held up or happened. i will never escape my exhauation, never escape internal friction with trying to do the most basic things. will this really be a permanent lifelong reality? will i never build a consistent structure where both surface thoughts and deep emotions are equally valid? will i never make progress? will i never see things worth remembering, a legacy, a vision, a game, a memorable achievement? all my life, as far back as I can remember, I've always felt like nothing will ever happen, and it doesnt help that everything in my life has only validated that feeling by failing or slipping away. Nothing will happen, I have nothing to look forward to, my life will always be stuck here in oblivion. I will always look to the future, but nothing will be made of the present because I will always be tired. I will never escape my exhauation. I am doomed, I will die alone, I am incapable of ever connecting with anyone, without ever having achieved the things I wanted to. And even if I do achieve them, whats the point? I'm too old. I'm disgusting. I hate myself and I find it disgusting to achieve youthful things at my age. Nothing will happen in my 20s, nothing has happened before and nothing will happen now. Absolutely nothing in my life will ever move fast enough, not that moving fast will be productive, it wont. My life is an endless pointless slog with no escape that fulfills the soul, no meaning, and nothing of value will ever be achieved.
No.307191
>>307164Heroin overdose is one of my option. But I am so afraid that I am going to get raped and mugged.
No.307215
Some old boomer doctor lied to the VA about my condition. Pushed the narrative that im lazy and dont want to work. They are trying to reduce my disability from 80% to 60% now and if it goes through i think thats it. Don't ever join theyll destroy your mind and body then rape you with the VA system after.
No.307219
>>307191that's one of the most unique ways to pass on, if only i got access to benzos otherwise i wouldn't hang myself
No.307222
>>307215How did you get it reduced? Did you try to aim for a higher percentage? I also have a 80%. Had it for about 4 years now. I heard online that if you try increase it and you fail they can potentially reduce it which is why I'm comfortable with 80%. My record shows it's also "Static" which pretty much means permanent. It sucks I still have to be a wagie, but being a NEET forever sounds depressing. Did that for 3 years and gained so much weight and was depressed and suicidal.
No.307242
>>307173I know that feel, im struggling with that too, but is it worth ending it over what other people think?
Really?
visualize yourself in the situation
Do you feel physical pain?
If no you can walk off the rest
At worst, get out of the situation if its that bad
Sure beats the hell out of dying in my opinion
>>307171Understand it for physical pain, otherwise not so much
Yeah certain people live shitty lives
yeah your brain might be made to suffer alot more and feel it more then other people
But if you are dead you cant feel anything at all
Cant feel a good nights sleep and dreams
Cant feel having a cigarette
Cant feel Breathing air anymore
No.307261
I completely messed up. I used the eye drops for an extra month longer than I should have, and now I could go blind. I wasn't considering suicide in a while, but I think there's no point in living like this anymore. I'm going to hit my head as hard as I can and then throw myself down the stairs. Wish me luck.
No.307288
Can we not post random erotic images here? Fuck that
No.307290
>>307288ah shit my bad, that wasn't my intention at all, literally the only image i have
No.307347
>>307310Lol Imendhem is being reposted again on here after ages
No.307350
As I'm nearing the end, I've noticed some things about suicide. After a certain point everything gets inverted, you're only obsessing about death instead of the usual survival. There is nothing or an afterlife, in both cases you are not here, it's a win-win situation. SI isn't a physical response, it's your mind. It tries to convince you you want to stay alive while you don't. There is absolutely no one to discuss your suicide with unless you want to go to psych ward.
No.307351
>>307310i thought we all knew already that consciousness is eternal
No.307354
>>307351If all life ceased to exist also consciousness would cease to exist, it needs a body to exist
No.307372
>>307170>if you arent in painDo you honestly think that even a single person in this thread isn't experiencing at least some level of pain? We wouldn't be on this website at all if we were well-adjusted individuals.
No.307402
>>307354>it needs a body to existthat's just pure materialist cope
it clearly requires nothing other than itself to exist
No.307403
>>307354>consciousness needs a bodyYikes… Yeah sweetie i am gonna ask for for a peer-review study with at least 50 sources to prove that claim. Last time I checked, godhead is all that exists, dualities are just a trick.
No.307409
it's been a while since i felt suicidal. i don't know why, but for some reason i rarely feel like it anymore. even now i'm thinking it'd be nice to be dead, but that's all. only a couple of months ago i nearly walked off to drink myself to death in the woods. but now it's just nothing. it's like it wasn't even real.
No.307410
>>307409>to drink myself to deathWhat makes you think that is a viable method? Unless you had a combo of benzos, opioids and a shit ton of vodka all together.
No.307411
>>307409I keep returning to the thought of slicing my veins or arteries if lucky. Even when things aren't as bad. Two years ago when I felt absolutely wretched, I'd drink and then slash a vein with a broken glass. I lost a litre of blood one time when I stabbed my foot. It wasn't an attempt but rather a test of sorts, to see if I can. I could cause bloodloss and it was a proof that if things go bad, I CAN end it. It still is a comforting thought sometimes
No.307419
>>307402>>307403Consciousness is a product of the body, we can already shut it down with anesthetics, without a brain you're not able to perceive anything (from senses to time) so you practically don't exist.
Not only this but consciousness is also in constant evolution, you're never the same, the consciousness of a child for example is very different from the one of an adult.
Everything points towards the fact that we are our body and when our body is altered also our perception of reality does, the rest is nonsense rambling.
You're free to believe we are immaterial ghosts floating around the universe that got enslaved in a material condition, but realize it is a superstitious belief without any kind of proof.
No.307420
>>307410it was very cold outside and i don't need much alco to pass out
>>307411i'm too much of a chicken to slice myself, but if i had a gun i'd maybe be able to shoot myself. but you need to be careful to blow your brains out properly lest your survive and i'm a clumsy retard so i wouldn't trust myself with a gun anyway
No.307422
>>307419You have no idea what consciousness is. Waking mind and it's buzz is not it.
No.307423
>>307420>it was very cold outside and i don't need much alco to pass outI don't know wiz… Thought of amputation because of the frostbite seems much more scary than mangling your brains.
No.307434
>>307423good call. gotta walk real far so they don't find you too soon. maybe it's good i didn't go for it after all.
No.307435
maybe burrowing a hole in river ice and jumping under? no way you get saved then
No.307463
Forget suicide by cop, just burn a Quran.
No.307526
>>307222Got a lawyer for free and i tried to get TDIU. Could be worth the back pay (01/2023). Thought itd be simple since i lost my job from my problems.
No.307529
I tied a slipknot with only 3 tries this time so that's something. Wish me luck wizzies.
No.307534
>>307215I'm not saying you should kill the boomer, but wouldn't at least killing him before killing yourself make more sense?
No.307548
What knot is best for suicide?
No.307570
I just wanna fall asleep in a cold dark room and not wake up or literally disappear from reality
No.307585
>>307548any is good if it holds
>>307570you still care how you die
No.307607
i have SN. bought it 4 years ago when my life collapsed. my dad (only family and friend) died of cancer. im chronically ill on top of that. doctors cant help. im in chronic pain.
i cannot delay this any further. i need to man up and swallow that shit and end it.
manning up is fucking difficult
No.307690
>>307415this kind of philosphocial nonsense makes sense when you go down the path, but not when you look at it objectively
I am not even the same person i was a few years ago, why would i be eternal?
I sure hope im wrong
No.307691
>>307690that argument stems from human inability to comprehend infinity. there isn't even a proof the world is truly infinite. why even assume that finitude can only exist as a part of infinitude? to move from one state to another the universe has to go through all the intermediate state, consciousness is most likely just a result of this movement. what is even more important is that we actually can't comprehend ourselves. what we do is merely obverse the behavioral patterns of that part of us which moves without explicit command from the consciousness. there isn't even a definition of what "i" truly means, so the consciousness isn't even truly aware of its own existence. what we call awareness of "being alive" is just a bunch of feedback loops that feed our calculations back to the entry point so we can reassess them. in low iq vocabulary it could be said as "we possess the ability to observe the previous movements of our soul". by being able to save previous states we can sort of analyze our own analysis, thus metacognition. this i think is the illusion of "i".
No.307697
>>307695but considering brain is a computer it is the most realistic answer i know. if self consciousness was real then "i" would be a solid concept instead it's very vague and many even argue that "i" doesn't exist and that ego is an illusion.
No.307698
what's with all this retarded philosophy debate itt?
i just want to kill myself
No.307701
>>307697Not the fella you're replying to but I don't think the brain can be boiled down to something as "simple" as a computer. I know this sounds woo-woo but my feeling is that the brain, like everything else in nature, has a lot of intuitive wisdom built into it. A computer is designed with a purpose within the limited mental constraints of its designers. There is a vastness, depth and interconnected-ness to things that emerge from natural evolutionary processes that simply do not map onto things made by humans. Perhaps the reason it is hard for us to pin down what "consciousness" is or "where that elusive I is located in the brain" is because we lack the language to even describe these sorts of things because we always get bogged down trying to dissect everything into atomic units.
No.307702
>>307698>i just want to kill myselfThat statement needs to be questioned because it's pretentious and presumptuous. Hence philosophy.
Now I'm with you as a pretentious and presumptuous person myself. I think it's obvious that nature and society are based on principles that guarantee suffering and I think it's obvious that any attempt to change yourself and others can never be more than marginal, temporary and superficial. Non-philosophically speaking: it was over before it began. Life sucks and will never get better unless you're a delusional npc.
Now if that's the case, it seems reasonable to assume that there is a force making it so. Do you believe you can defy that force by ending the body? Perhaps you can because that force selects those who are willing to put up it with it. That's the irony of the antinatalist desire: soon countless single men and countless single succubi are going to die without children and the world will go on with an ever increasing number of delusional npc's. Say rope-chan, do you like that thought?
No.307717
>>307702but this is the suicide thread, not the philosophy thread
idk about “defying” the force behind it by kms, but at the very least this life will end, so even if i have no absolute knowledge of whatever comes afterwards, i’m sure it won’t be a repetition
and yes, that final thought does bring me some comfort
we can’t leave this world without a smile, wiz
No.307900
>>307702while nature has some suffering built in, it's nothing like the sustained, ultra boring, slow boil which society, that is man, has chosen and imposed on itself by it's own free will.
If you kill yourself you indeed opt out of the system.
>>307717yeah I don't like people denying the finality and reality of death. reincarnation is nonsense
No.307905
>>307415>pictureAn infinite time of non conciousness doesn't feel like either infinite nor no time at all. It doesn't feel like anything because you do not exist whether it be from death or not being born. The non-existence from death is not the same as the non-existence from not yet being born. You were not "pulled out" of a death-state because you did not exist before birth. Your only plane of existence before birth is in the future, that you are "to be". But there's not yet a you. In order to say that we end up where we started you would need to say we started existing before we were born. I'm really not convinced that we exist in an infinite state of life OR death before birth.