/dep/ - Depression

>>308410
>Every problem in my life is my fault and my fault alone
Surely. :)

>>308411
if you are trying to tell me that the misery comes from different points with this image then i disagree, if i was slightly less vulgar and impulsive i would be living my best life.
and even if i decide to take other factors into account it still wont solve the problem of my life being a weird pathetic joke, and almost nobody viewing me positively.

>>308412
>if i was slightly less vulgar and impulsive i would be living my best life.
Ever wonder why you were so vulgar and impulsive?

Inborn traits, learned patters during early life.
Genetics meets environment and adapts as much as it's able.

Every crude joke you made that backfired, every impulse you acted on had a reason behind it and it was the best choice you could have possibly made at the time.
Not because it was objectively the best choice, but because it was the best choice your very being allowed for.
Don't beat yourself up over it.

Also aren't you too young to write yourself off? I mean sure, looking at it through the deterministic lense it's not like it matters, you'll keep doing "your best" regardless if it's going to be enough or not.
But calling whatever was after high school "gymnasium" makes me think you aren't even 18 and from somewhere in Eastern Europe.

It was the most miserable time of my life too, up till that point that is… Things will get worse, but if you really are that young you can still have fun before your body decays.
Better to start doing stuff to mitigate future suffering early. Wouldn't want to be 30 and post the same shit having wasted another decade, would you?

It might unlocked your superpower: covering for other people's faux pas situations. It'll cement you into the 'not serious' group but you might gain some alliances along the way (worked for me).

>>308413
>Don't beat yourself up over it.
the consequences are still there, i know we are all rotten to the core but this is something that very well might bite me in the ass in the future

>Also aren't you too young to write yourself off? I mean sure, looking at it through the deterministic lense it's not like it matters, you'll keep doing "your best" regardless if it's going to be enough or not.
But calling whatever was after high school "gymnasium" makes me think you aren't even 18 and from somewhere in Eastern Europe.
i am 17 years old and a white northern european

>but if you really are that young you can still have fun before your body decays.
what kind of fun do you think i should have? I have tried dating and it went nowhere and i am not popular enough to be invited to parties.

>It'll cement you into the 'not serious' group but you might gain some alliances along the way (worked for me).
the thing is that i desperately want to be taken seriously, how hard that may be

>>308415
>i am 17 years
>I have tried dating and it went nowhere and i am not popular enough to be invited to parties

lol

You're in the wrong place buddy. Try ut more dating, you still have roughly 65 years time for it.

welcome to being a wizard. stop trying, it will only traumatize you further and make your life worse. embarrassing mistakes will follow you long after everyone has forgotten about them, they'll flash randomly in front of your eyes when you're happy and ruin your day. finish up whatever schooling you have left and prepare yourself for a life of being a recluse. you are not normal, you're never going to be normal and if you try too hard, you'll just end up hurting yourself.

>but he's only 17 you sick fuck!!

yeah, so? i knew it was over when i was 12. you can lie to yourself until adulthood but at some point it will be undeniable. the worst part is that people will still gaslight you to try to be "normal" because what else is there in life? there is solitude, dedicating yourself to some form of knowledge or craft, as far away from other humans as possible. in short, choose wizardry, or rather, accept it, you never had a choice in the first place.

>>308422
Sure, give up on the normie stuff of acceptance and succs/relationships whatever.
I never bothered with that myself as I was blessed with bountiful 2D resources since before maturation.

I still hope OP doesn't think this means lay down and rot. Things will get much much worse unless he can get bux (or a comfy job) and works to maintain his health.
Rotting away will end with misery unless he has it in him to accept that fate and I don't think most wizards here even have that in them.

>>308415
Well I'm from eastern eu so I guess I was projecting, never heard a westerner call it "gymnasium" because the English word is some sort of sports related facility.

>what kind of fun do you think i should have?
Gonna need to keep trying stuff until something sticks.
Painting is fun. Carving can be as well.
Unfortunately not everyone is capable of being satisfied with stuff they do without sharing it with others. Most aren't wired to be self motivated either so just rotting away is a likely outcome for apprentices.

>>308422
seems kinda pointless if you ask me, although you have a point on that "you will never be normal stuff", i accepted that a long time ago

>>308423
my main interests have always been creative writing, history and politics. I am already a member of a political youth organization, but i doubt i would be able to become a politican considering my early life