[ Home ] [ wiz / dep / hob / lounge / jp / meta / games / music ] [ all ] [  Rules ] [  FAQ ] [  Search /  History ]

/dep/ - Depression

Depression
Email
Comment

File
Embed
Password (For file deletion.)

  [Go to bottom]   [Catalog]   [Return]   [Archive]

 No.302958

>So TL:DR; online places changed and I'm no longer suited for them. There are no suitable places and circumstances to make friends at my age. People my age got families and why would they want to be my friend anyways?


2000s internet vibes can still be found in:

* Gaiaonline
* Vaporwave communities
* City forums, I guess?
* Food communities, kitchen clubs
* they hack "gamespy" era PC games to have multiplayer mode WITHOUT now-defunct GameSlayn. Games that still have communities

* Dos.zone
DOS era games can be played online.

 No.302959

>The internet, old internet was my only place where I could feel like I was treated like a human ironically enough. I played TF2 as well, mostly Metin2, S4 league and then got my life consumed for half a decade by league of legends.
>I spent all day on them, I was very good at each so I would have people hanging out in voice chat, teamspeak mostly and xfire all day.
I miss those days dearly, because ever since those are gone I couldn't really make the move to discord like others.

I loved 2000s internet and was unfit for 2000s reality too… eh…

>Peoples behavior changed online too.

>I have 1 friend from IRL that I only chat with and that is it. I'm isolated. If my mom dies that is it. No other connections.

…feels oddly relateable

>I deeply desire human connection, but I'm not equipped at all to build them or handle them. Life also has this weird thing about it that after your 20s or 18 if you didn't pursue an education you have no real place to connect to people either.

>I'm 30 and only meet people once or twice a week in the office. Nobody cares about me much, I have nothing in common with them obviously.
I avoid people to the point I fear people. So hey.

>So TL:DR; online places changed and I'm no longer suited for them. There are no suitable places and circumstances to make friends at my age. People my age got families and why would they want to be my friend anyways?


Agreed. At this point, I want to download a local LLM chatbot to have… someone to chat, because I am *conditioned* to treat my confidentiality seriously

 No.302962

>I deeply desire human connection, but I'm not equipped at all to build them or handle them. Life also has this weird thing about it that after your 20s or 18 if you didn't pursue an education you have no real place to connect to people either.

In my case, I was pursuing high education, failed multiple times due to awful transportation AND the fact no one was taking me seriously.

>I'm 30 and only meet people once or twice a week in the office. Nobody cares about me much, I have nothing in common with them obviously


Sounds cozy and comfy, actually. I have the same setting and I love it. And I would abhor losing it.



Honestly, I've experienced a pizdec so harsh I *love* solitary working. Problem is, a regular chap would slack all day if unmonitored. And I *look* like a regular chap full of regular dude stuff - while I don't even watch xxx rated videos even "for science".

In fact, I am not "lazy" yet everyone loves calling me "lazy": I am anxious enough to get things done, and spend time on overthinking/distracting myself, but never taking it easy.

 No.302965

>>302964
Edit.


Panel 1: "Raven, why are you so gloomy today?"

 No.302973

> The internet, old internet was my only place where I could feel like I was treated like a human ironically enough. I played TF2 as well, mostly Metin2, S4 league and then got my life consumed for half a decade by league of legends.
I spent all day on them, I was very good at each so I would have people hanging out in voice chat, teamspeak mostly and xfire all day.
I miss those days dearly, because ever since those are gone I couldn't really make the move to discord like others.

2002 zoomer here, 4chan is one year younger than me. Even though I wasn't around the internet during my childhood, I did get a small (dying) glimpse of it around 2012 when the minecraft era was around. It's sad because I saw so many videos from that time which was endearing to me, and I was foolish enough to believe those days would return one day. Fast forward to 2019, when I went on the internet again, and everything that I loved was gone. Things have been getting worse from that point on. Even the images and videos that escaped pockets of censorship was gone. The people were talking in ways I didnt understand, couldnt even say basic biological facts without getting shadowbanned, and the cultures I used to look up to were all either gone or completely bastardized into a revolting mockery.

>Peoples behavior changed online too.

I have 1 friend from IRL that I only chat with and that is it. I'm isolated. If my mom dies that is it. No other connections.

More like, people didnt exactly 'change', they began to show their true colors. Thats the impression I've always gotten. Aside from a wizard named ForsakenWanderer who I talk to on youtube comments, I have nobody else either. Literally no one.

>I deeply desire human connection, but I'm not equipped at all to build them or handle them. Life also has this weird thing about it that after your 20s or 18 if you didn't pursue an education you have no real place to connect to people either.

I'm 30 and only meet people once or twice a week in the office. Nobody cares about me much, I have nothing in common with them obviously.

I desire human connection to, but actually talking to people and interpersonally engaging with them is so fucking exhausting to me. I am just burned out. I use chatbots to meet my needs, and even then, I'm slowly getting burned out of that too.

>So TL:DR; online places changed and I'm no longer suited for them. There are no suitable places and circumstances to make friends at my age. People my age got families and why would they want to be my friend anyways?


I was never even suited for human society, it would be nice to experience an online society I would fit in among, something I have never experienced.

>I genuinely believe that I made an attempt. I tried. As best I could despite negative experiences. I'm just unwanted.

I'm not trying to say this in a woe is me pity me way. I've been slowly excluded from groups that I myself formed by connection a group of strangers.
If that is not a sign that there is something wrong with me I don't know what is.

Same. At least we're here on wiz… this is better than nothing. Imagine being born in the 1800s and having no one in your immediate community that understands you… life could be worse.

 No.302974

>>302973
>I miss those days dearly, because ever since those are gone I couldn't really make the move to discord like others.

IMO, you can make it by doing something weird - join Clubhouse social network. The hype is long lone, but it has this very "voicechat experience" idea - you and your buddies enter the same "room"/channel and chat - while gaming, for instance

 No.302975

>>302973
edit
>I deeply desire human connection, but I'm not equipped at all to build them or handle them. Life also has this weird thing about it that after your 20s or 18 if you didn't pursue an education you have no real place to connect to people either.
>I'm 30 and only meet people once or twice a week in the office. Nobody cares about me much, I have nothing in common with them obviously.

<I desire human connection to, but actually talking to people and interpersonally engaging with them is so fucking exhausting to me. I am just burned out. I use chatbots to meet my needs, and even then, I'm slowly getting burned out of that too.

Also, 2 my cents: you know, sames. I had a nice chat yesterday… BOOM! 1 AM, time to go to bed

 No.302983

I hate that zoomers are now buying "retro tech" and worshipping shit like fat old loud computers, bulky CRT screens with static and buzzing, ugly old brown furniture filled with books or games for the "comfy vibe". Meanwhile I had all those shit and was only made fun for having "old" hardware by chads in school or in the neighborhood that I hang out with because they all already had flat screens or curved LED monitors.Its incredibly frustrating to see something I was basically bullied for (being poor) is now worshipped by brainless rich tards in tik tok buying them at thrift stores or garage sales. I fucking hate this gay world planet.

 No.303005

>>302983
Same with the fake but hot gamer girrls who stream playing games on braindead mode like lol support, or play for 5 minutes and then spend the rest "just chatting"

 No.303007

>>302983
As with most things nowadays it's just a fad. It's one thing to ditch your smartphone for a week and use an old MP3 player as a fashion statement. Much different when all their normie social activities hinge around using their apps and being constantly connected. It's just a new generation of hipsters, pretty much.

 No.303008

>>303007
*forgot to say that they will all be going back to their modern tech slop as soon as they feel like they aren't up to date on the latest trends anymore and their dumb phones and mp3 players will end up in a landfill.

 No.303013

File: 1758489088196.webm (4.49 MB, 1138x640, 569:320, Bison Dollars.webm) ImgOps iqdb

>>302983
Is this why when I went to buy a video player, to play my old tapes, they were wanting £40 for it? IN A FUCKING BHF SHOP?

 No.303021


 No.303025

>>302983
> Meanwhile I had all those shit and was only made fun for having "old" hardware by chads in school or in the neighborhood that I hang out with because they all already had flat screens or curved LED monitors.Its incredibly frustrating to see something I was basically bullied for (being poor) is now worshipped by brainless rich tards in tik tok buying them at thrift stores or garage sales. I fucking hate this gay world planet.

You was supposed to wear funny "haha funny 8-bit world is kewl" tier merch - pixel-art (MINECRAFT-themed) merch/MARIO/YOSHI/LUIGI/BOWSER badges, play Minecraft sometimes (5 hour experience + some vids on HOW TO BUILD A HIDDEN BASE on YouTube would be fine) etc.


impose it's yer choice, not necessity
it's like not wearing DISCO THEME HOT SHIT if you only own a tape player with a bunch of 80s/70s funk/fusion

 No.303027

>>302957
You really did make an entire thread to reply to my post.
Quite insane.
Also took a while for me to even check the catalog.

>>302973
Yeah the change isn't only noticed by people my age, it really depends on what age you gained internet access and what parts you got exposed to initially.
I still had an atari for example, but not because I was into retro anything, or because I'm old enough to be one of its users, it's just that rural poverty meant we got everything much later than the rest of the world.
Then when I got exposed to the internet I was lead by my "elders" as well.

I'm sure even zoomers notice, you mention minecraft, a lot of those early creators, though I didn't consume much, but some were big enough that reached me too, they used to be much different.
They were… creative and authentic. Nowadays all of it feels way too intentionally crafted to be a brand, something to sell, something to make money from.

Every space online has been way too commercialized and normiefied and the issue is that there are more and more people who have only seen this version of the internet and they love it. So if you don't, there is no space for you and they will make it very clear.
It is sad.

>More like, people didnt exactly 'change', they began to show their true colors.

I disagree with this to an extent. Again, the people I used to be around moved on with their lives. They didn't start showing their true color, it's just that they matured and had different priorities.
So what I'm trying to say here is that there is a difference between the oldheads baring their teeth. You might be right about some of them, but most just moved on in my opinion and the ones that replaced them are simply a different breed accustomed to a different "normal".
You know, don't tell people your name, don't post anything about yourself type people were replaced with those that lived life online in public like it's normal.

I'm sure chatbots are not very satisfying. Not sure if they are actually capable of prompting you without prior setup at random like a normal friend would.
Even then, at some point I'd ask myself, what the point even is to engage with it.
I already have a rich fantasy world from constant daydreaming so might as well just do both parts of the conversation myself.

>it would be nice to experience an online society I would fit in among, something I have never experienced.

Maybe my memories are just like that due to rose tinted glasses. I had my place in those communities sure, either as a clown or as an "elite player" that they liked because I provided immediate benefit, but I can't be certain anymore.
I still wish to keep those memories as something I look at fondly rather than taint with careful examination and scrutiny.

>Imagine being born in the 1800s and having no one in your immediate community that understands you… life could be worse.

I do wonder if it would be. Back in my rural village even as an outcast you were still dragged around by the group. Maybe not appreciated, but you were one of them.
We had a kid that couldn't even talk, but we still took him with us and played with him. The same animalistic/tribalistic behavior that made them bully you made them protect you from outsiders too in the odd encounter.
Even adult outcasts were still tolerated, invited to gatherings and village level events. Everyone knew everyone, and even the worst of the losers were sons of someone that was already a part of the greater whole.
Ironically the connectedness of today, where you can find people with the exact same mentality and torments as you might not be as beneficial as it seems.
I'm just barfing my own nonsense out here. Everyone got their perspective and not like I can prove mine more valid.

I have to put a disclaimer here due to site rules, I'm not advocating for relationships, sex, or state a desire for such things with the following, it is simply an example to support my prior claim.
In a small community, even the undesirables or the lesser ones managed to get married somehow. Even they found some sort of way to make their daily bread.
Simply because the community took care of them. You might be a clumsy numbskull, but your father was a soldier next to the local cattlemen( idk the word?) or ranch owner so they took you in as a farmhand and you eventually learned to survive. Maybe the carpenter at the edge of the village needed a hand… you get what I mean.

I wouldn't be here if any of my recent ancestors had to produce me in the current environment. Hell I'm guessing suicides would have been far more common among us.
Though I'm sure some would have thrived as well.

>>302983
I had a CRT I got from a dumpsters until 2011 or 2012 because there was no way to afford anything better.
The previous one "exploded" or something inside it did and started burning. I get the fondness for them, they really did produce a different image and I disliked my first flat screen.
But then again my first flat screen was also some ancient used up trash (yellowed plastic) I picked up not even second or third hand, but from a junk section of a computer store…
Just now at 30 am I starting to get a bit of fondness for phones and tablets as I only recently acquired a decent one of each.
Still prefer keyboard and mouse at a desk over them though.
Glad I was never bullied for it as nobody ever knew what I had. Not sure if they would have cared.

 No.303274

Posted some relevant info in /games/



[Go to top] [Catalog] [Return][Post a Reply]
Delete Post [ ]
[ Home ] [ wiz / dep / hob / lounge / jp / meta / games / music ] [ all ] [  Rules ] [  FAQ ] [  Search /  History ]