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/dep/ - Depression

Depression

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File: 1624212144757.gif (670.73 KB, 396x279, 44:31, honey.gif) ImgOps iqdb

 No.242227

Do you ever self-medicate depression through eating food?

I practically need chocolate, ice cream, pizza, candy bars, pastries, cake etc. daily or I can't sleep at all because my mood gets so low during the day.
The happiest I'm going to feel all day is 1-2 hours after eating, and during eating.

French fries and potato chips are also very soothing and improve the mood for a few hours. I do have to limit the eating to maybe 2000-2500kcal a day so I don't become obese.

At this point, I think eating is the only thing I look forward to in life. It's the only real thing giving me any joy anymore. Video games, movies etc. don't cut it anymore. I'm tired of them.

 No.242231

Yes, I eat every 24 hours. It makes it a special occassion every day.

I am extremely happy when I wake up at 12 AM and see I only need two more hours to get "permission" to eat.

I often stretch the meal to an hour or more. I buy a lot of different things to eat.
Red meat is probably the thing that makes me the happiest, though I absolutely adore chocolate as well.

 No.242253

Words can't express how happy I am while eating pizza.

Pizza with some Pepsi Max is the best thing I know in this life.

 No.242257

File: 1624222164805.gif (213.15 KB, 300x300, 1:1, 0.gif) ImgOps iqdb

same here. my body is morphing into the skinnyfat shape but I honestly can't bring myself to do something about it, im simply unable to care. eating seems to be the only thing that brings me pleasure other than masturbating sometimes, when im not doing one of those things im either in a state of uncomfortable numbness or torturous agony

 No.242265

>>242257
what kind of foods do you eat to numb the pain?

i have recently found out potato chips are a great mood stabilizer, far better than any antidepressant, especially if you eat them very slowly and dip them into a sauce

 No.242266

I do this too but I'm trying to stop or at least cut back

 No.242268

>>242227
yes but I really need to stop doing it because I weight 300lbs

 No.242272

i gained weight on antipsychotics once, it gave me tits and sitting down was uncomfortable. how the fuck do you even be fat it would be like torture 24/7

 No.242273

>>242227
Same here, I only really look forward to the next meal

 No.242340

I've been fasting for 36 hours now and I don't really feel that good or any of the benefits.

All I can think of is how I'm going to wake up tomorrow and eat a bunch of cookies and cake.

 No.242343

your gif reminds me when I started smoking weed again after a few years break I got so hungry for sugar that I got a 5 lb jar of honey out of the closet and ate the whole thing within a week or two. Weed makes it possible for me to feel pleasure from food and anime and stuff. That's why I medicate with weed.

 No.242345

> Do you ever self-medicate depression through eating food?
No really, when I am depressed I usually train until I start vomiting or study until I collapse, sometimes I just punch myself until I start bleeding.
I am not good enough and only pain makes me feel less guilty

 No.242346

>>242343
Doesn't weed lead to overeating though? I never smoked weed, but I read all these stories of how people felt an urge to suddenly eat 4 big macs and 2 large fries after a weed smoking session.

I don't know, seems to me potheads overindulge in food once they're done smoking. At least some.

 No.242347

>>242346
They're called the "munchies", and yes.

 No.242353

>>242346
Weed is actually pretty funny like that. You do get the munchies and want to eat large quantities of seemingly random food, but when you use it regularly you begin to have 0 appetite when you’re not high. So often what happens is someone won’t eat all day until they smoke, and then basically binge.

 No.242358

>>242346

The science is not really understood, but marijuana users tend to eat more and also not put on weight. https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2013/05/study-why-pot-smokers-are-skinnier/275846/

 No.242369

>>242358
It's not rocket science. Their eating intervals are very long.

Doesn't matter if they binge 3500 kcal worth of chocolate, pizza and burgers in one go, if they only eat the next time they smoke in 48 hours.

They'd probably lose weight doing so.

 No.242380

>>242346
Yes, but once you get a tolerance to it it's only a slight appetite increase and you can just eat normal amounts of food. With no tolerance the food cravings are very intense though. I vape weed everyday but am still skinny and eat healthy.

 No.242490

I've been using chocolate and chamomille to reduce my anxiety problems lately.

 No.242499


 No.242516

>>242490
Chamomille tea I assume? That taste is heavenly.

I should buy it again.

 No.242751

Burgers, Tuna, pizza, soda, ice cream, and gummy bears. It got so bad at one point that I was purging so that I could eat more often without getting too fat. At that point I was even showering with a day's old vomit in the tub. These days food helps my mood a lot but I only eat twice a day and don't purge anymore. I gained 25 lbs but I seem to have stabilized at 200lbs. I'm comfortable at this weight and I will never be in a relationship so what do my looks matter. I was afraid of suffering through painful chronic health problems but I don't care anymore. The only other thing that helps my mood is good sleep where I dream. If I don't get that then the next day will be miserable outside of mealtime.

 No.242767

>>242227
My case is basically the same as yours OP. I always set Sunday aside as the day I gorge myself, because weekends are so extremely boring without food to stimulate me. I'm bored of everything and food and masturbation are pretty much the only two big pleasures I have left.

Over the week I always put a nice snack to look forward to in my lunchbox for work, so I look forward to it all day, and when I've eaten it, it means the workday is more than half over, so I'm also happy about that. Then I look forward to dinner, which my unemployed roommate cooks for me. But at the weekends I have neither of those, and I have nothing to do for the whole time, nothing to look forward to. So, on Sunday I go to the local supermarket and buy biscuits, chocolate, pastries, chips, soda… all stuff I never really eat, and just get as much as I can eat in a day. It's the best part of the week by a fucking mile.

 No.242786

File: 1624877974484.jpg (199.26 KB, 1528x1146, 4:3, cake.jpg) ImgOps iqdb

>>242767
>So, on Sunday I go to the local supermarket and buy biscuits, chocolate, pastries, chips, soda… all stuff I never really eat, and just get as much as I can eat in a day. It's the best part of the week by a fucking mile.

Wish I could afford that. Sounds like heaven.

 No.242787

>>242786
I mean I never spend more than about €10 each time, it's quite a lot of food and the cost is, well, not that low for a min wage wagie like me, but it's worth it

 No.242816

>>242516
chamomille tea is great indeed

>>242786
>Wish I could afford that. Sounds like heaven.
same bro

sometimes I feel like spending all my savings on nice food for 2 weeks and then go to an isolated place and commit seppuku
anyway I cannot eat too much sweet food, not used to it

 No.242832

>>242816
I have had the same dreams. I see so much nice stuff in the stores that I'll never be able to buy.

I just want to know what truffle butter tastes like, or parmigiano reggiano aged for 48 months. Or really nice cold cuts like iberico bellota (I looked it up, it's pigs that only eat acorns and the meat tastes inexplicably good as a result).

I can't buy any of it because im minwage, my food budget for the month is about a hundred bucks. Some of these items cost upwards of 20-30 bucks for a tiny, tiny portion.

When my depression worsens, I'm really tempted sometimes to just blow all my savings on all the god-tier foods in all the nearby shops and delis and go to nirvana that way.

But I'm scared to do it, as I don't have that much in savings (around $400 dollars). And if I only buy the best of the best treats I can blow through that in a day.

 No.242837

>>242832
There's some kind of japanese beef in my local butchers shop that costs something like 100 dollars for a slice.

Wish I was rich enough to test it.
I also want to test a really expensive wine to see what it's like. Like one of those $500 bottles.
It must be pure bliss compared to the swill sold in normal stores for 5 dollars a bottle.

 No.242859

>>242837
>>242832
The quality-to-price ratio very quickly goes to shit, so it isn't worth it. $100 wine can be worth it but there's hardly any difference going to 500+

 No.242864

>>242859
I've been wondering whether expensive wines are actually better, or just branded Veblen goods (sold with a compelling story just so rich people can snob about it in restaurants, while actually not tasting any better than the $100 version).

The fact some of the 'fancy' chateaus in Bordeaux or Champagne are owned by LVMH who makes their fortune from branding mediocre products as luxury, makes me wary.

I'd rather try expensive meat.

>>242837
That meat is wagyu or kobe. Absolutely on my bucket list before dying. It is one of the few meats apparently that melt in the mouth.

 No.242905

>>242227
Yes, but I have to moderate it because every time I go over 230lb I get double vision and from reading up on it basically I would eventually go blind from being fat.

 No.242906

>>242272
It still is.

 No.242907

I hadn't weighed myself in months, and surprisingly, my weight was unchanged. It must be all of the walks I take.

Being bored and stuck at home provides ample opportunity to be a fat degenerate. I should really lose like 30-40 lbs. 15 lbs would return my BMI to normal but I don't want to be a flabby, skinnyfat fuck.

 No.242952

>>242907
OP here.
I'm scared of becoming fat or even overweight again as well, so while
I do still eat sweets and treats daily, I've now limited them to 500kcal a day.
The rest must come from lean proteins, vegetables and occassionally fullgrains like bread or pasta (not much).

Portion control is not mentally easy but it's one way to indulge in the good stuff daily while not becoming fat.

 No.242963

No but I love watching food challenges where people eat ungodly propositions of food in a short period of time. Personally I don't like sweet stuff, I much more prefer spicy food.

 No.242965

>>242963
are you me? i freaking love watching those hotdog eating championships

weird thing is, youd suppose the champion is some huge 600lbs sumo guy
but actually the top champions (miki sudo, sonya thomas) are skinny girIs

i dont understand how they can consume so much more food than big guys

 No.242966

>>242965
The best male competitive eater (Takeru Kobayashi, though now overtaken by that succubus) is also sort of slender.

Fat people in general don't do well in those competitions.

 No.242969

the stomach expands as food gets shoveled into it, and skinny eaters have less fat in the abdomen for the expanding stomach to push against. competitive eaters don't eat junk except at competitions. They're typically fit and have much healthier diets than the average American. They stretch their stomachs prior to a contest by consuming bulky low calorie foods and ingesting massive quantities of water.

It's a sport requiring discipline and training like any other. You don't just show up as a fat guy and take the trophy home. Doing things like eating 40 hotdogs in a few minutes is difficult.

As for why so many of them are succubi, I'd assume simple statistics, there are more overweight men than succubi. It's easier for a succubus to become a competitive eater.

 No.242984

I get my summer holiday bonus of $250 tomorrow. The first thing I'm going to do is say fuck it to constantly grinding beans, bread and cheap food daily.

I'm going completely ham on the local delis, supermarkets and bakeries, and buying all the chocolate cake, meats, condiments and artesan foods I can lay my hands on.

I just want to escape poverty for one month. Starting tomorrow.

 No.242985

>>242984
Sounds good. I'd probably do that if I had an extra couple hundred laying around.

Or at least I'd spend half of it on quality food and delicacies.

 No.243045

>>242985
Update: I did it, and I am currently the happiest person on Earth. Filled my fridge and pantry with all sorts of unusual foods, sweet pastries, cakes, deli meats and such.

I also got a t-bone steak because I need protein. I've been eating basically bread, cheese and beans for the last few months (beans have some protein but not much).

Sorry for saging the last post, I confused this with another thread.

 No.243065

>>243045
good to know. enjoy it!

 No.243302

I like eating a lot. It is sort of a coping mechanism. I at least try to eat healthy so that I do not feel disgusted/become overweight.

 No.246180

I've been taking hour-long walks and eating no more than like 1,500 calories per day for weeks and my weight refuses to drop below 165-ish. Such is the power of sitting or laying down for the remaining 15 hours in a typical day.

 No.247242

Yes I struggle a lot with being a fat wizzie and having diabetes and depression. I'm trying to go on a diet though and walk early in the morning, but yesterday I bought a pack of Tim Tams and ate the whole thing.

 No.247251

>>242227
This thread is very relatable for me. I feel sad when I realize how happy cheap snacks make me, usually the highlight of my day or week. I always look forward to having my junk food and I like to have the comfiest atmosphere possible while I have it. Make tea and watch anime usually. It's even a motivator to get exercise because I know if I do I'll be able to eat more.

 No.247269

I used to do it but eating well and physical activity makes me feel better. It's like after a month or so it effectively replaced junk food and my cravings became less intense. Still, just ate 60 € worth of fresh sushi, chirashi, sashimi and a miso soup, i'm a fucking monster and feel like my stomach gonna explode. I lost 20 pounds lately and didn't order any food or went to a eating place for a long time but today was one of these days when i just wanted to stuff my face with good food. Sometimes i get the feeling that deep down it's the only thing that really matters. Whenever i fantasize about being filthy rich i immediately think of all the fancy food i would, and could afford, to copiously devour like a starved pig.

 No.247283

>>242227
I've always had an unhealthy relationship with food. I was the fattest kid in my class ever since I can remember, and though I'd always make plans to change that, none of them ever worked.

I don't use drugs, and drinking is tricky because my parents are muslim and don't allow alcohol in our home, and sneaking it in is harder than I believed it to be, since I don't have keys to my room and my parents enter it often without knocking.

Food has always been my drug, my coping mechanism, my way of getting a dopamine high. When I was happier I was just somewhat overweight, still fatter than all of the fit kids in class, but I wasn't too bad.

In the last few years my depression has gotten worse than ever, and I've started having suicidal thoughts for the first time, and with that came my biggest weight gain even, I got to the point of having almost 120kg.

In 2019 it felt like I was making a recovery with my mental health, a very subtle one, but better than nothing, and with that my weight got better too, due to me actually managing to keep up with a diet, I managed to get to 100kg.

Now I'm very close to killing myself, so I've stopped caring about my weight, last time I went up the scale it measured 110kg, but it's probably more than that now, though I don't want to go look, it'll only make me feel worse.

In the last few days I've eaten pretty much only junk food, and lots of it, I'm about to have a pizza for dinner, and I'm looking forward to that, because I've had a bad day again, I broke down again and my suicidal thoughts had another spike, so I need a dopamine high.

 No.247293

Recently I came across this post on /pol/.
https://archive.4plebs.org/pol/thread/338978317
For five days in a row now I've been following his advice. Each morning I drink 3/4ths of a teaspoon of Hain iodized sea salt, and a sprinkle of salt along with my regular water throughout the day. According to many studies most Americans are highly deficient in iodine, and theoretically this is why the body craves junk food- for the salt containing iodine in it

This week compared to my last is as different as night and day. My energy levels are significantly higher. My mind processes information faster. Reflexes are faster. Instead of feeling like a fleshy creature my body feels as though it's made of solid earth, I feel solid and strong. I could go on and on about the amazing effects I'm experiencing but none of you should simply take my word for it. Go and spend five dollars at the grocery store and test it out for yourself

 No.247300

>>247293
>According to many studies most Americans are highly deficient in…
I think I have read that about every nutrients, every vitamin in existence.
Scientitians said it so it must be true. Let's pop pills and follow every pop science fad of the week.

 No.247317

Do you enjoy food even after it has been eaten, or just while eating?

 No.247339

>>242227
Food might be the only part of being alive that I actually enjoy and am in love with. I have probably spent more time fantasizing about food than about succubi or relationships. I like to restrict heavily or even fast for days, then get a ton of it at once and have a good orgy. It’s the only good thing. Being fat from it does suck, and maybe if I hadn’t gotten fat so young I wouldn’t be a wiz. It doesn’t matter now.
I have a bunch of delivery food on the way right now after eating >=1000kcal/day for three weeks, and my heart rate is elevated and I’m as excited as a normal person probably is before sex.

 No.247340

>>247317
Both. While eating is enjoyable for the obvious reasons, and then afterwards if you eat enough (or of something like cheese with opioid-like properties), I’m sort of high for an hour or two afterwards.

 No.247371

>>247300
looking at the disturbing physical state of the average american, it does not seem difficult to believe

 No.247379

>>247340
I had to google it and seems you're right.
Some quality cheeses apparently act like opioids in the brain.

Huh, I was always wondering why I am almost addicted to cheese, or why it's so hard to stay off it.

 No.247390

>>247293
Excellent article here on salt intake. Everything we've been taught by the school and media about salt has been a lie
https://drjasonfung.medium.com/the-salt-scam-1973d73dccd

 No.247403

File: 1632173671089.pdf (2.55 MB, Lies My Doctor Told Me Me….pdf)

>>247339

Beware of eating thru all the day long, a couple of times without mixing much is enough. And beware of carbs and red meats.

 No.247404

File: 1632173762323.pdf (2.87 MB, The Salt Fix by Dr. James ….pdf)

>>247390

There have been even entire books about it! Even Arnold Ehret claims salt to be "an excellent muci remover" in his own words.

 No.247422

Food makes me feel ok sometimes but the somnolence i get after eating fast food/cardbogydrates is too much so im glad i don't like food that much otherwise I'd be a fatty



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