File: 1626343000598.jpeg (1.15 MB, 2000x1400, 10:7, gts5AQP.jpeg) ImgOps iqdb
Post here when you don't have enough to say for a topic and it's too depressing for the general crawl thread.
not sure if fits here but it greatly irritates me how people can't see the reigning darwinism literally everywhere even as hiki darwinism and decay is impossible to defy
Mom insists I go with my brothers (I don't along with them) to a beach. I hoped this COVID nonsesne would get her off my case, but no such luck.
File: 1626359685226.png (523.74 KB, 631x631, 1:1, 149b4d43437cbf27310891c636….png) ImgOps iqdb
>>243932
Darwinism reigns everywhere you look at families, friends and so on for example my mother and my sister always talk shit when they finish talking with other people they are supposed to be bonded with, and as book I'm reading exposes, every interaction not based on mere aesthetic witness or escapism just for the sake of it, will induce somekind of sickness process through hormonal changes and will deliver mental suffering due to the constant conflictive and hierachic nature of it all except for that escapism is the only way to avoid hurting others or yourself, even mere greetings have a mindgame behind it where darwinism will come to play the moment you are honest(example: how are you: not good) and I think it should be self explainatory how decay is everywhere too even the hdd I'm using right now can fail at any moment and ruin my day, biological things are even worse off normal people have this insane concept death will eventually come for us but in truth death is constantly around us.
Darwinism reigns everywhere you look at families, friends and so on for example my mother and my sister always talk shit when they finish talking with other people they are supposed to be bonded with, and as book I'm reading exposes, every interaction not based on mere aesthetic witness or escapism just for the sake of it, will induce somekind of sickness process through hormonal changes and will deliver mental suffering due to the constant conflictive and hierachic nature of it all except for that escapism is the only way to avoid hurting others or yourself, even mere greetings have a mindgame behind it where darwinism will come to play the moment you are honest(example: how are you: not good) and I think it should be self explainatory how decay is everywhere too even the hdd I'm using right now can fail at any moment and ruin my day, biological things are even worse off normal people have this insane concept death will eventually come for us but in truth death is constantly around us.
>>243936
I want to be an asshole and say “just get an SSD bro no big deal”, but yeah I know what you mean. People are just as barbaric and ruthless as any other animal.
I want to be an asshole and say “just get an SSD bro no big deal”, but yeah I know what you mean. People are just as barbaric and ruthless as any other animal.
>>243939
Because we are animals? The idealistic notion that humans are somehow above animals was always a gross mistake in thought. God didn't create us in his own image or if he did, well that doesn't really leave us with a good feeling about God.
Because we are animals? The idealistic notion that humans are somehow above animals was always a gross mistake in thought. God didn't create us in his own image or if he did, well that doesn't really leave us with a good feeling about God.
File: 1626364868923.jpeg (97 KB, 627x400, 627:400, bMl4BvC.jpeg) ImgOps iqdb
>>243940
Humans are one step above mere animals, in terms of evolution, retard. Although, some people do posses animalistic traits and indulge in degenerate behavior, they are not the majority. Years ago people used to kill or isolate such individuals, modern society praise them. It's the never-ending battle between Order and Disorder, morality and degeneracy.
Humans are one step above mere animals, in terms of evolution, retard. Although, some people do posses animalistic traits and indulge in degenerate behavior, they are not the majority. Years ago people used to kill or isolate such individuals, modern society praise them. It's the never-ending battle between Order and Disorder, morality and degeneracy.
>>243940
"Any other animal" would imply you are both in agreement about what humans are, at least I don't get the impression he thinks humans are any better.
I remember when I came home a few nights ago, a neighbor's cat was snooping around my property (they really don't take good care of their pets). The cat came right up to me and started rubbing on me, and let me pet it. I did that for ten minutes or so.
Compare that to when I found some negress casing my property, stammering out the flimsiest excuse when I caught her. The cat might expect food, but still seemed to enjoy my company quite a bit since I was the one who departed first. It has no desire to stomp my flowers, break my windows nor plunder my home.
Other animals are the only beings who have ever made me feel a sense of affection. Ironically, the humans that I should connect to more easily just alienate me. It seems a certain level of inherent and insurmountable misunderstanding can actually create more relatability than cogent communication can. I watch a lot of Harald Baldr (he specifically avoids tourist traps) and he generally seems to have a great time in foreign places even when his ability to communicate is very limited, but he might just ooze charisma and that's why he's so accepted. A wild beast just wants a meal; it wouldn't sadistically subjugate and torture me for decades like humans do, even if I were its meal.
I should've shot the damn coon looking to fuck me over when all I ever do is mind my own business (and I was well within my right to, I believe), but that urge just shows I am as stupid and violent as the rest of this garbage ape civilization. In a sense, I think humans are even lower than other animals. They make pointless (key word) war and sickness out to be virtuous. If some creature could be considered "superhuman," I would vote on the octopus. They are an entire species of self-made geniuses, unlike human scum who can only compound their "knowledge" and superstitions. Maybe the octopus would control the world if they had the same adaptation, or maybe they'd be as fucked up as humanity is.
I'm realizing I sound like a huge faggot now, so I'm gonna stop.
"Any other animal" would imply you are both in agreement about what humans are, at least I don't get the impression he thinks humans are any better.
I remember when I came home a few nights ago, a neighbor's cat was snooping around my property (they really don't take good care of their pets). The cat came right up to me and started rubbing on me, and let me pet it. I did that for ten minutes or so.
Compare that to when I found some negress casing my property, stammering out the flimsiest excuse when I caught her. The cat might expect food, but still seemed to enjoy my company quite a bit since I was the one who departed first. It has no desire to stomp my flowers, break my windows nor plunder my home.
Other animals are the only beings who have ever made me feel a sense of affection. Ironically, the humans that I should connect to more easily just alienate me. It seems a certain level of inherent and insurmountable misunderstanding can actually create more relatability than cogent communication can. I watch a lot of Harald Baldr (he specifically avoids tourist traps) and he generally seems to have a great time in foreign places even when his ability to communicate is very limited, but he might just ooze charisma and that's why he's so accepted. A wild beast just wants a meal; it wouldn't sadistically subjugate and torture me for decades like humans do, even if I were its meal.
I should've shot the damn coon looking to fuck me over when all I ever do is mind my own business (and I was well within my right to, I believe), but that urge just shows I am as stupid and violent as the rest of this garbage ape civilization. In a sense, I think humans are even lower than other animals. They make pointless (key word) war and sickness out to be virtuous. If some creature could be considered "superhuman," I would vote on the octopus. They are an entire species of self-made geniuses, unlike human scum who can only compound their "knowledge" and superstitions. Maybe the octopus would control the world if they had the same adaptation, or maybe they'd be as fucked up as humanity is.
I'm realizing I sound like a huge faggot now, so I'm gonna stop.
>>243941
This kind of stupidity, self-misunderstanding and idealistic childish thinking is what causes the most suffering in the world. Your evolution is nothing but an empty word humans use to feel good about themselves. The biggest war, that caused the most suffering for humanity only went down, not even 100 years passed since. Progress is a meme. Humans possess more intelligence, that is all. This is the only thing that makes us different.
You are no different from the cruel, psychopathic and "degenerate" serial killer and torturer at all, as long as animalistic instincts go. You don't act upon these urges because you don't have to, in "civilization" you give up your right for violence and entrust it to the state. So instead of you needing to kill others either to protect yourself or to survive, the police and military do these things for you. So that you can feel moral and good about yourself, which are both luxuries at the end of the day.
Morality, civilization, these things don't matter and they don't exist, at least not like how you imagine them to be. The first step to awakening would be to acknowledge that you are sinful, just like others: not because of some immoral act you comitted but because you exist. Nothing that exists can be pure, good or moral.
There are no good or bad humans, only suffering humans. As long as you don't acknowledge your own darkness you can't start on the path of redemption.
>>243949
Pets are natural companions of men so natural for you to feel so. Humans pose the most danger and cause the most suffering to their fellow humans. But you are wrong on the just meal part, most animals also like to toy with weaker animals and cause them unnecessary suffering. That said, animals aren't worse a single bit than humans are.
This kind of stupidity, self-misunderstanding and idealistic childish thinking is what causes the most suffering in the world. Your evolution is nothing but an empty word humans use to feel good about themselves. The biggest war, that caused the most suffering for humanity only went down, not even 100 years passed since. Progress is a meme. Humans possess more intelligence, that is all. This is the only thing that makes us different.
You are no different from the cruel, psychopathic and "degenerate" serial killer and torturer at all, as long as animalistic instincts go. You don't act upon these urges because you don't have to, in "civilization" you give up your right for violence and entrust it to the state. So instead of you needing to kill others either to protect yourself or to survive, the police and military do these things for you. So that you can feel moral and good about yourself, which are both luxuries at the end of the day.
Morality, civilization, these things don't matter and they don't exist, at least not like how you imagine them to be. The first step to awakening would be to acknowledge that you are sinful, just like others: not because of some immoral act you comitted but because you exist. Nothing that exists can be pure, good or moral.
There are no good or bad humans, only suffering humans. As long as you don't acknowledge your own darkness you can't start on the path of redemption.
>>243949
Pets are natural companions of men so natural for you to feel so. Humans pose the most danger and cause the most suffering to their fellow humans. But you are wrong on the just meal part, most animals also like to toy with weaker animals and cause them unnecessary suffering. That said, animals aren't worse a single bit than humans are.
Being an unlikeable prick by virtue of the fact that I didn't socialize because I'm afraid of people. People thought I was snobbish/angry/looked scary when I was trying not to vomit or visibly shake when there were people around me. Lunch was the worst. I tried to find refuge from the throngs of people but normalfags gathered even in there. I was an anxiety-ridden buoy in a sea of hushed whispers and cliques judging me for not being a part of a clique.
Then there were the overly-nice, patronising motherfuckers with pity marked black on their faces when they look at the poor lonely kid who just needs to cheer up or whatever. Self-righteous bastards. Worst of the lot. Incessantly following me and trying to figure out my tics when I just wanted to not be afraid of every-goddamn-body. They get bored and leave - but not before scoffing at you for not bowing before their obviously superior personage and showering them with praise for so graciously introducing their presence to your contemptible vicinity. How angelic they are, to show love to the downtrodden and meek and be subsequently martyred by the putrid souls they so desperately tried to save.
Yes, I'm bitter.
Then there were the overly-nice, patronising motherfuckers with pity marked black on their faces when they look at the poor lonely kid who just needs to cheer up or whatever. Self-righteous bastards. Worst of the lot. Incessantly following me and trying to figure out my tics when I just wanted to not be afraid of every-goddamn-body. They get bored and leave - but not before scoffing at you for not bowing before their obviously superior personage and showering them with praise for so graciously introducing their presence to your contemptible vicinity. How angelic they are, to show love to the downtrodden and meek and be subsequently martyred by the putrid souls they so desperately tried to save.
Yes, I'm bitter.
>>243965
> Your evolution is nothing but an empty word
That's a scientific fact.
>The biggest war, that caused the most suffering for humanity only went down, not even 100 years passed since.
And? Animals kill all the time.
>Humans possess more intelligence, that is all.
Ego, self consciousness, morality and many other traits as well that animals do not posses.
>Morality, civilization, these things don't matter and they don't exist
You are delusional.
> Your evolution is nothing but an empty word
That's a scientific fact.
>The biggest war, that caused the most suffering for humanity only went down, not even 100 years passed since.
And? Animals kill all the time.
>Humans possess more intelligence, that is all.
Ego, self consciousness, morality and many other traits as well that animals do not posses.
>Morality, civilization, these things don't matter and they don't exist
You are delusional.
File: 1626409939431.gif (948.3 KB, 480x270, 16:9, grizelda.gif) ImgOps iqdb
>>243965
> You don't act upon these urges because you don't have to, in "civilization" you give up your right for violence and entrust it to the state. So instead of you needing to kill others either to protect yourself or to survive, the police and military do these things for you. So that you can feel moral and good about yourself, which are both luxuries at the end of the day.
Insightful and eye-opening.
> You don't act upon these urges because you don't have to, in "civilization" you give up your right for violence and entrust it to the state. So instead of you needing to kill others either to protect yourself or to survive, the police and military do these things for you. So that you can feel moral and good about yourself, which are both luxuries at the end of the day.
Insightful and eye-opening.
File: 1626425230515.png (35.44 KB, 736x430, 368:215, Screenshot_3.png) ImgOps iqdb
>>243988
that poster might be a crazy succubus
that poster might be a crazy succubus
File: 1626428609987.jpg (753.38 KB, 2732x1536, 683:384, 482306-anime-anime_girls-f….jpg) ImgOps iqdb
>>243985
>That's a scientific fact.
Humans only evolved in terms of intelligence. We know better than other animals how to use our surroundings to our own goals, that's it. There is no moral evolution or humanistic evolution, you live in a bubble that is why you think so.
>And? Animals kill all the time.
Yes, so do we. That is my whole point, genius. We aren't better or worse than other animals, again we are just more intelligent.
>Ego, self consciousness, morality and many other traits as well that animals do not posses.
Ego is a lie and so is morality. Self-consciousness doesn't exist, because there is no self. We are more aware of things than other animals, I give this to you, but it is only a side-effect of our higher intellect.
I am the one who is delusional? That is rich, coming from someone who thinks like a child, in bad guys vs good guys comic book thinking. You can only feel good and moral because society and your family takes care of you. Your society has military forces, they drone jihadists, your police force kills and stains their hands with blood every day in your place. There are no innocent lambs in this world. Blood is on your hands too, just like on mine. Religions of all kind try to give us this message. Original sin, for example. You have to accept your sin, your vile, evil nature if you ever want to help lessen the suffering in this hellhole of a world.
>That's a scientific fact.
Humans only evolved in terms of intelligence. We know better than other animals how to use our surroundings to our own goals, that's it. There is no moral evolution or humanistic evolution, you live in a bubble that is why you think so.
>And? Animals kill all the time.
Yes, so do we. That is my whole point, genius. We aren't better or worse than other animals, again we are just more intelligent.
>Ego, self consciousness, morality and many other traits as well that animals do not posses.
Ego is a lie and so is morality. Self-consciousness doesn't exist, because there is no self. We are more aware of things than other animals, I give this to you, but it is only a side-effect of our higher intellect.
I am the one who is delusional? That is rich, coming from someone who thinks like a child, in bad guys vs good guys comic book thinking. You can only feel good and moral because society and your family takes care of you. Your society has military forces, they drone jihadists, your police force kills and stains their hands with blood every day in your place. There are no innocent lambs in this world. Blood is on your hands too, just like on mine. Religions of all kind try to give us this message. Original sin, for example. You have to accept your sin, your vile, evil nature if you ever want to help lessen the suffering in this hellhole of a world.
>>243990
As society evolves so do our moral principles, you can't have one without the other.
>We aren't better or worse than other animals, again we are just more intelligent.
Comparing simple animals to humans is like comparing modern robots who lack any free will of their own to advanced androids from a science fiction novel.
>I give this to you, but it is only a side-effect of our higher intellect.
Wrong.
>Bottlenose dolphins have bigger brains than humans (1600 grams versus 1300 grams), and they have a brain-to-body-weight ratio greater than great apes do (but lower than humans). "They are the second most encephalized beings on the planet,"
Dolphins are some of the smartest mammals on our planet, second only to humans, and yet they are simply cannot be compared to us. Because intelligent life is extremely rare. Consciousness is a blunder of blind nature, something that shouldn't be. And yet it's there, a side effect of evolution.
>I am the one who is delusional?
Yes you are.
> in bad guys vs good guys comic book thinking
Never said that. There's only Entropy and Order. Morality, degeneracy… It's all part of it.
>Your society has military forces, they drone jihadists, your police force kills and stains their hands with blood every day in your place.
And? Where did I say that killing is wrong? It's part of our nature. But you always need a motive, animals and psychopaths (essentially, broken humans) don't bother with that.
>Religions of all kind try to give us this message. Original sin, for example.
There are thousands of different religions. If you're talking about Abrahamic ones, then they are simply interconnected. Christianity and Islam are just sects of Judaism.
As society evolves so do our moral principles, you can't have one without the other.
>We aren't better or worse than other animals, again we are just more intelligent.
Comparing simple animals to humans is like comparing modern robots who lack any free will of their own to advanced androids from a science fiction novel.
>I give this to you, but it is only a side-effect of our higher intellect.
Wrong.
>Bottlenose dolphins have bigger brains than humans (1600 grams versus 1300 grams), and they have a brain-to-body-weight ratio greater than great apes do (but lower than humans). "They are the second most encephalized beings on the planet,"
Dolphins are some of the smartest mammals on our planet, second only to humans, and yet they are simply cannot be compared to us. Because intelligent life is extremely rare. Consciousness is a blunder of blind nature, something that shouldn't be. And yet it's there, a side effect of evolution.
>I am the one who is delusional?
Yes you are.
> in bad guys vs good guys comic book thinking
Never said that. There's only Entropy and Order. Morality, degeneracy… It's all part of it.
>Your society has military forces, they drone jihadists, your police force kills and stains their hands with blood every day in your place.
And? Where did I say that killing is wrong? It's part of our nature. But you always need a motive, animals and psychopaths (essentially, broken humans) don't bother with that.
>Religions of all kind try to give us this message. Original sin, for example.
There are thousands of different religions. If you're talking about Abrahamic ones, then they are simply interconnected. Christianity and Islam are just sects of Judaism.
Anyone who believes in any form of evolution in humans, by it moral, biological or in intelligence is deluded.
The only real action a man can take is to kill another person or to kill oneself. Everything else is a farce.
>>244035
just some stupid christcuck, evolution is the closet way of understanding how we came to be. All life originated from water and evolved from there.
just some stupid christcuck, evolution is the closet way of understanding how we came to be. All life originated from water and evolved from there.
I'm starting to question my religious upbringing and role of the religion in modern society.
It just seems like a perfect trap, and beautifully works in conjunction to give succubi more power over an average male. Seems like a trap and like many other things nowadays if something doesn't work out it's because
>Yeah, this wasn't real [thing].
And it's your fault.
I'm not saying there's no God, but I'm just wondering if practicing Christianity like majority of the society seems to practice isn't misguided and by principle.
It just seems like a perfect trap, and beautifully works in conjunction to give succubi more power over an average male. Seems like a trap and like many other things nowadays if something doesn't work out it's because
>Yeah, this wasn't real [thing].
And it's your fault.
I'm not saying there's no God, but I'm just wondering if practicing Christianity like majority of the society seems to practice isn't misguided and by principle.
>>244001
Society doesn't evolve morally, because morality is a lie and second, humans today aren't different from those in medieval times or any other period, as far as cruelty and aggressivity goes. We have better technology but people are the same, instead of swords and stones now we cause suffering with poison gas and bombs.
We can compare simple animals to humans and we should. Because we are animals too, no amount of idealistic shit is going to change that fact. In fact, humans were seen as the smartest animals until Christianity came along.
>dolphins
What are you even arguing for? They are inferior only in terms of intelligence, which was my whole point.
>Consciousness is a blunder of blind nature, something that shouldn't be. And yet it's there, a side effect of evolution.
Consciousness is directly tied to intelligence. We aren't more aware than other animals because we are special or because of the Holy Spirit, you idiot. It is only about intelligence, yet again.
>There's only Entropy and Order. Morality, degeneracy… It's all part of it.
This is exactly comic book thinking. You idealize some parts of history as outstanding or morally-ideal but it was only apes pretending to be more than apes. This is the history of humanity.
>And? Where did I say that killing is wrong? It's part of our nature. But you always need a motive, animals and psychopaths (essentially, broken humans) don't bother with that.
All right child, whatever you say. You always need a motive! Hitler had a motive, Mao had a motive, jihadists have a motive, the crusaders had a motive, the psychopath who wants to rape and kill you has a motive too. Does it change the fact that you end up increasing pain and suffering? No. Motives don't mean shit, actual results matter. You, like all moralfags, want it both - to survive in this world and to remain pure, moral, innocent. I've got bad news for you kid, you can't have both. You either give your vote to self-preservation and do everything you can so you can live out your urges (which you most likely already do, without even realizing it) or you try to be moral, which requires you to live as a lamb among wolves, and we both know you never pick the second one. Morality is just roleplaying. "I'm doing the same shit as you (kill or cause suffering) yet I demand respect because I'm…somehow different!"
>religions
Christianity is influenced by eastern thought and is pessimistic by nature. Read more Schopenhauer. Eastern religions always imply there is something wrong with this world, be it ignorance or whatever. In the case of catholicism, it is original sin.
>>244159
It isn't about biology, it is about people implying humans morally evolved or somehow became better morally than other animals. This kind of evolution is just plain delusion.
>>244160
Christianity is confusion par excellence. They mix the judaistic optimism and eastern/new testament pessimism and try to form a coherent religion out of it when it is completely contradictory. Leave religions behind and research occultism, spiritualism and philosophy on your own. Be your own Buddha and seek knowledge on your own.
Society doesn't evolve morally, because morality is a lie and second, humans today aren't different from those in medieval times or any other period, as far as cruelty and aggressivity goes. We have better technology but people are the same, instead of swords and stones now we cause suffering with poison gas and bombs.
We can compare simple animals to humans and we should. Because we are animals too, no amount of idealistic shit is going to change that fact. In fact, humans were seen as the smartest animals until Christianity came along.
>dolphins
What are you even arguing for? They are inferior only in terms of intelligence, which was my whole point.
>Consciousness is a blunder of blind nature, something that shouldn't be. And yet it's there, a side effect of evolution.
Consciousness is directly tied to intelligence. We aren't more aware than other animals because we are special or because of the Holy Spirit, you idiot. It is only about intelligence, yet again.
>There's only Entropy and Order. Morality, degeneracy… It's all part of it.
This is exactly comic book thinking. You idealize some parts of history as outstanding or morally-ideal but it was only apes pretending to be more than apes. This is the history of humanity.
>And? Where did I say that killing is wrong? It's part of our nature. But you always need a motive, animals and psychopaths (essentially, broken humans) don't bother with that.
All right child, whatever you say. You always need a motive! Hitler had a motive, Mao had a motive, jihadists have a motive, the crusaders had a motive, the psychopath who wants to rape and kill you has a motive too. Does it change the fact that you end up increasing pain and suffering? No. Motives don't mean shit, actual results matter. You, like all moralfags, want it both - to survive in this world and to remain pure, moral, innocent. I've got bad news for you kid, you can't have both. You either give your vote to self-preservation and do everything you can so you can live out your urges (which you most likely already do, without even realizing it) or you try to be moral, which requires you to live as a lamb among wolves, and we both know you never pick the second one. Morality is just roleplaying. "I'm doing the same shit as you (kill or cause suffering) yet I demand respect because I'm…somehow different!"
>religions
Christianity is influenced by eastern thought and is pessimistic by nature. Read more Schopenhauer. Eastern religions always imply there is something wrong with this world, be it ignorance or whatever. In the case of catholicism, it is original sin.
>>244159
It isn't about biology, it is about people implying humans morally evolved or somehow became better morally than other animals. This kind of evolution is just plain delusion.
>>244160
Christianity is confusion par excellence. They mix the judaistic optimism and eastern/new testament pessimism and try to form a coherent religion out of it when it is completely contradictory. Leave religions behind and research occultism, spiritualism and philosophy on your own. Be your own Buddha and seek knowledge on your own.
>>244166
>In fact, humans were seen as the smartest animals until Christianity came along.
What, exactly, are you implying here?
>In fact, humans were seen as the smartest animals until Christianity came along.
What, exactly, are you implying here?
>>244167
That Christianity introduced or enforced and set in stone the idealistic thinking. Regarding all things, even the human species. So now humanity was special, God created it in its own image and so humaniy became holy and sacred. A whole species that doesn't belong to this world, according to christian doctrine, a whole species that should strive to inhabit the other world, the kingdom of Heaven. A whole species that is different from other animals (in what way exactly, they could never sufficiently explain).
That Christianity introduced or enforced and set in stone the idealistic thinking. Regarding all things, even the human species. So now humanity was special, God created it in its own image and so humaniy became holy and sacred. A whole species that doesn't belong to this world, according to christian doctrine, a whole species that should strive to inhabit the other world, the kingdom of Heaven. A whole species that is different from other animals (in what way exactly, they could never sufficiently explain).
>>244169
>>244170
I'll humor you with a reply. Anthropocentrism was a universal trait until some time after the "Enlightenment Era." I'm sure it doesn't take much to see that nearly every pre-AD religion viewed humans as being either carefully crafted by or closely associated with God(s) as opposed to animals. Take, for instance, the first part of Ovid's Metamorphoses(possibly written when Jesus Christ was eight years old):
>Then, every void of Nature to supply,
>With forms of Gods he fills the vacant sky:
>New herds of beasts he sends, the plains to share:
>New colonies of birds, to people air:
>And to their oozy beds, the finny fish repair.
>A creature of a more exalted kind
>Was wanting yet, and then was Man design'd:
>Conscious of thought, of more capacious breast,
>For empire form'd, and fit to rule the rest:
>Whether with particles of heav'nly fire
>The God of Nature did his soul inspire,
>Or Earth, but new divided from the sky,
>And, pliant, still retain'd th' aetherial energy:
>Which wise Prometheus temper'd into paste,
>And, mixt with living streams, the godlike image cast.
>Thus, while the mute creation downward bend
>Their sight, and to their earthly mother tend,
>Man looks aloft; and with erected eyes
>Beholds his own hereditary skies.
>From such rude principles our form began;
>And earth was metamorphos'd into Man.
Quite anthropocentric, no? Besides that, philosophy until the 19th century was all anthropocentric. Even Heraclitus and Aristotle did not divorce the unique character of humans from their philosophies. I could look for more creation myths or even quotes from philosophers but you get the idea.
Even Buddhism, Taoism, and Shintoism were anthropocentric. It isn't like Buddha took the form of a cow and tried to give bovines their ultimate enlightenment. It was kind of obvious humans were different.
Nihilism and the related philosophies are genuinely new developments in human philosophy. Before then humans were seen as something of entirely different substance from animals, to the point that it wasn't even something they'd think to discuss.
>>244170
I'll humor you with a reply. Anthropocentrism was a universal trait until some time after the "Enlightenment Era." I'm sure it doesn't take much to see that nearly every pre-AD religion viewed humans as being either carefully crafted by or closely associated with God(s) as opposed to animals. Take, for instance, the first part of Ovid's Metamorphoses(possibly written when Jesus Christ was eight years old):
>Then, every void of Nature to supply,
>With forms of Gods he fills the vacant sky:
>New herds of beasts he sends, the plains to share:
>New colonies of birds, to people air:
>And to their oozy beds, the finny fish repair.
>A creature of a more exalted kind
>Was wanting yet, and then was Man design'd:
>Conscious of thought, of more capacious breast,
>For empire form'd, and fit to rule the rest:
>Whether with particles of heav'nly fire
>The God of Nature did his soul inspire,
>Or Earth, but new divided from the sky,
>And, pliant, still retain'd th' aetherial energy:
>Which wise Prometheus temper'd into paste,
>And, mixt with living streams, the godlike image cast.
>Thus, while the mute creation downward bend
>Their sight, and to their earthly mother tend,
>Man looks aloft; and with erected eyes
>Beholds his own hereditary skies.
>From such rude principles our form began;
>And earth was metamorphos'd into Man.
Quite anthropocentric, no? Besides that, philosophy until the 19th century was all anthropocentric. Even Heraclitus and Aristotle did not divorce the unique character of humans from their philosophies. I could look for more creation myths or even quotes from philosophers but you get the idea.
Even Buddhism, Taoism, and Shintoism were anthropocentric. It isn't like Buddha took the form of a cow and tried to give bovines their ultimate enlightenment. It was kind of obvious humans were different.
Nihilism and the related philosophies are genuinely new developments in human philosophy. Before then humans were seen as something of entirely different substance from animals, to the point that it wasn't even something they'd think to discuss.
My god, there isn't one damn dep crawl thread where they don't violently discuss about something totally offtopic. Here's my stupid contribution to the essence of this post:
I'm ready to die, let a natural disaster take me away. Done with this world.
I'm ready to die, let a natural disaster take me away. Done with this world.
>Walk into a room
>Everyone immediately stops talking
What is this phenomenon called? Literally feels like I'm the bad guy in a movie where he's making his intro.
Happens not only at home but also everywhere else.
How do people just KNOW there's something wrong with you?
>Everyone immediately stops talking
What is this phenomenon called? Literally feels like I'm the bad guy in a movie where he's making his intro.
Happens not only at home but also everywhere else.
How do people just KNOW there's something wrong with you?
I either had a pilonidal cyst or a very bad ingrown hair between my buttocks.
It burst recently and I'm like a female on her period now. Never seen so much blood.
It burst recently and I'm like a female on her period now. Never seen so much blood.
>>244187
Pray to God it won't become chronical. Pain down there is awful and going to the doctor while it is a normal medical condition for them is not a nice thing to do.
Pray to God it won't become chronical. Pain down there is awful and going to the doctor while it is a normal medical condition for them is not a nice thing to do.
>>244171
See the thing is, Christianity set in stone this whole insanity. I don't deny that before Christianity these views existed but they weren't dogmatic in any way. If you look at greek culture, many famous and intelligent persons dismissed their own myths and lore as fairy tales or the fantasy of poets. The greek intellectual world was diverse in the best sense and allowed free-thinking. Then came Christianity and threated everyone who thought otherwise to succumb to lies and childish tales. That is the big fucking difference.
You are very wrong about anthropocentric thought. Aristotle for example considered humans as the most intelligent animals. Buddha's philosophy is also essentially about humans being no different from animals, except for their intellect and awareness.
You don't have to be a nihilist to see that humans are the same as any other species, just a reasonable and honest person. Also funny, but ancient myths and religions explicitly portray humans as animalistic persons. Look at ancient pagan art, many depict half-man, half-animal characters. Coincidence? No. Ancient people knew that humans have their origins in nature, like other animals.
>>244184
It is natural for people to stop talking when someone they aren't familiar with or don't trust enough walks into the room. Do you discuss everything with strangers?
>>244188
Older than most wizkids here.
>>244189
I'm not obsessed with it, most people are though, even so called atheists or secular persons. That de-christianization is coming along really slowly, despite christians screaming and raging about the degenerate West.
See the thing is, Christianity set in stone this whole insanity. I don't deny that before Christianity these views existed but they weren't dogmatic in any way. If you look at greek culture, many famous and intelligent persons dismissed their own myths and lore as fairy tales or the fantasy of poets. The greek intellectual world was diverse in the best sense and allowed free-thinking. Then came Christianity and threated everyone who thought otherwise to succumb to lies and childish tales. That is the big fucking difference.
You are very wrong about anthropocentric thought. Aristotle for example considered humans as the most intelligent animals. Buddha's philosophy is also essentially about humans being no different from animals, except for their intellect and awareness.
You don't have to be a nihilist to see that humans are the same as any other species, just a reasonable and honest person. Also funny, but ancient myths and religions explicitly portray humans as animalistic persons. Look at ancient pagan art, many depict half-man, half-animal characters. Coincidence? No. Ancient people knew that humans have their origins in nature, like other animals.
>>244184
It is natural for people to stop talking when someone they aren't familiar with or don't trust enough walks into the room. Do you discuss everything with strangers?
>>244188
Older than most wizkids here.
>>244189
I'm not obsessed with it, most people are though, even so called atheists or secular persons. That de-christianization is coming along really slowly, despite christians screaming and raging about the degenerate West.
>>244196
Guess it's the final warning to change my sedentary lifestyle and lose all the weight I can.
I had a similiar thing on my back last year and boy it was pure pain before it bursted.
Guess it's the final warning to change my sedentary lifestyle and lose all the weight I can.
I had a similiar thing on my back last year and boy it was pure pain before it bursted.
>>244166
>evolution doesn't exist
>morality doesn't exist
>consciousness doesn't exist
>humans are animals
your logic implies that animals don't exist too, because it is humans who classify certain life forms as animals.
>inb4 humans are not superior to animals
>humans and animals are the same
Well, if animals don't exist (according to your logic) then human beings are no better than bacteria, both are life forms after all.
Truth is, evolution is just a king of the hill game and we ,currently, are at the top. It's an objective fact. Modern science doesn't fully understand what consciousness truly is (and how it came to be) but it understands consciousness better than some early 19th century philosopher.
We also don't know the origins of life, there's only theories. If "dead" matter became "living" matter then it means that humans are the same as rocks and everything in between.
>evolution doesn't exist
>morality doesn't exist
>consciousness doesn't exist
>humans are animals
your logic implies that animals don't exist too, because it is humans who classify certain life forms as animals.
>inb4 humans are not superior to animals
>humans and animals are the same
Well, if animals don't exist (according to your logic) then human beings are no better than bacteria, both are life forms after all.
Truth is, evolution is just a king of the hill game and we ,currently, are at the top. It's an objective fact. Modern science doesn't fully understand what consciousness truly is (and how it came to be) but it understands consciousness better than some early 19th century philosopher.
We also don't know the origins of life, there's only theories. If "dead" matter became "living" matter then it means that humans are the same as rocks and everything in between.
>>244205
Animals exist, humanity is a part of it too. What is so hard to understand about this? You can play word-games, but that won't change the truth that your cousins are monkeys and that you only differ from them because you possess slightly more intellect. I don't doubt evolution in a biological way, I am skeptical about moral evolution and the fact that humans are becoming more than mere animals. We aren't better today than we were 100 years ago, we aren't better than we were during medieval times, we aren't better than we were during ancient Rome, we aren't better than we were when we lived in caves, as far as compassion and all that goes. There is no moral or humanistic evolution, only intellectual and biological evolution.
Animals exist, humanity is a part of it too. What is so hard to understand about this? You can play word-games, but that won't change the truth that your cousins are monkeys and that you only differ from them because you possess slightly more intellect. I don't doubt evolution in a biological way, I am skeptical about moral evolution and the fact that humans are becoming more than mere animals. We aren't better today than we were 100 years ago, we aren't better than we were during medieval times, we aren't better than we were during ancient Rome, we aren't better than we were when we lived in caves, as far as compassion and all that goes. There is no moral or humanistic evolution, only intellectual and biological evolution.
>>244209
Your logic is flawed. If you equate humans with animals, then you should equate us with all the other life forms, and all the other life forms with matter and matter with nothingness.
>slightly more intellect
Really now?
> I am skeptical about moral evolution
You clearly don't understand what I mean by morality. You can't have a functioning society without some kind of moral principles. Even cavemen had their own moral system, unlike animals. I guess that's only because we are "slightly more intelligent", and not because we are conscious.
>We aren't better today than we were 100 years ago
Humans only evolved about 200,000 years ago. Civilization as we know it is only about 6,000 years old, and industrialization started in the earnest only in the 1800s. Of course Romans were similar to us, they lived only 2000 years ago (80 generations).
Your logic is flawed. If you equate humans with animals, then you should equate us with all the other life forms, and all the other life forms with matter and matter with nothingness.
>slightly more intellect
Really now?
> I am skeptical about moral evolution
You clearly don't understand what I mean by morality. You can't have a functioning society without some kind of moral principles. Even cavemen had their own moral system, unlike animals. I guess that's only because we are "slightly more intelligent", and not because we are conscious.
>We aren't better today than we were 100 years ago
Humans only evolved about 200,000 years ago. Civilization as we know it is only about 6,000 years old, and industrialization started in the earnest only in the 1800s. Of course Romans were similar to us, they lived only 2000 years ago (80 generations).
>>244206
Humans are very intelligent rocks.
>t. Subjectivism
>>244199
Christianity didn't set it in stone. As for philosophers, I have no doubt you may have read a buzzfeed article trying to say nihilism was the norm until ebul chrindstams came along.
>>244189
There was pre-Christ Christianity and post-Christ Christianity. Judaism is a sect of heretics that rejected the messiah of their own supposed God because they wanted purely material gain.
>>244209
How do you define that our cousins are monkeys? Can't we be as related to the atoms that we share in stones and dirt? Why do you arbitrarily pick some atoms over others?
Humans are very intelligent rocks.
>t. Subjectivism
>>244199
Christianity didn't set it in stone. As for philosophers, I have no doubt you may have read a buzzfeed article trying to say nihilism was the norm until ebul chrindstams came along.
>>244189
There was pre-Christ Christianity and post-Christ Christianity. Judaism is a sect of heretics that rejected the messiah of their own supposed God because they wanted purely material gain.
>>244209
How do you define that our cousins are monkeys? Can't we be as related to the atoms that we share in stones and dirt? Why do you arbitrarily pick some atoms over others?
>>244205
Evolution ain't king of the hill game, that's darwinian which is a specific human term. Evolution is about adaption to environment. And no, humans are not the longest living species till now and probably other life forms will survive us because they are better adopted to all kinds of conditions and extreme climate changes or nuclear toxins and so on.
Evolution ain't king of the hill game, that's darwinian which is a specific human term. Evolution is about adaption to environment. And no, humans are not the longest living species till now and probably other life forms will survive us because they are better adopted to all kinds of conditions and extreme climate changes or nuclear toxins and so on.
>>244209
>you only differ from them because you possess slightly more intellect
ok go try living like a monkey and find out how evolved you really are for this planet. the fact is, humans cant live like animals and theyre the least adapted species to the planet. on top of that monkeys are way stronger than humans and there is absolutely 0 evolutionary reason why we would get so much weaker when for the majority of human history hard labor was still critical. and then theres the fact that monkeys are covered with hair and humans arent, even though europeans had to live in way colder areas. you would think this would cause them to evolve thick fur but instead they have minimal body hair. even if coats made up for this, more hair would still be beneficial.
>There is no moral or humanistic evolution
youre really helping our moral evolution along with that "humans are no better than animals" idea
>you only differ from them because you possess slightly more intellect
ok go try living like a monkey and find out how evolved you really are for this planet. the fact is, humans cant live like animals and theyre the least adapted species to the planet. on top of that monkeys are way stronger than humans and there is absolutely 0 evolutionary reason why we would get so much weaker when for the majority of human history hard labor was still critical. and then theres the fact that monkeys are covered with hair and humans arent, even though europeans had to live in way colder areas. you would think this would cause them to evolve thick fur but instead they have minimal body hair. even if coats made up for this, more hair would still be beneficial.
>There is no moral or humanistic evolution
youre really helping our moral evolution along with that "humans are no better than animals" idea
>>244215
Except humans, other forms of life, can predict environmental changes and prepare for them. At this point we can even destroy a giant asteroid that would otherwise wipe us out.
Except humans, other forms of life, can predict environmental changes and prepare for them. At this point we can even destroy a giant asteroid that would otherwise wipe us out.
>>244217
Attacking the launch rocket en masse to prevent it would be the best shot antinatalists ever have at finally ending humanity and human suffering once and for all.
Anyway, those asteroid destroying rockets are scifi, and they would only help against small ones.
You can't change the course of a massive asteroid that is moving at a speed like 130,000km/h even if you fire a nuclear weapon at it.
Attacking the launch rocket en masse to prevent it would be the best shot antinatalists ever have at finally ending humanity and human suffering once and for all.
Anyway, those asteroid destroying rockets are scifi, and they would only help against small ones.
You can't change the course of a massive asteroid that is moving at a speed like 130,000km/h even if you fire a nuclear weapon at it.
>>244219
Depends on the size of an asteroid and the nuke/s. It's more than possible to make hundreds of nukes that are more powerful than AN602 and detonate them at the same time.
Depends on the size of an asteroid and the nuke/s. It's more than possible to make hundreds of nukes that are more powerful than AN602 and detonate them at the same time.
File: 1626749133326.gif (266.02 KB, 478x369, 478:369, 1608313887318.gif) ImgOps iqdb
I'm way past wishing for happiness. All I want is the bare minimum mind conditions every other fucking normalfag has so I can go through the day without existential pain.
>>244219
You don’t have to change its course, if it fragments enough then it will burn up in the atmosphere.
You don’t have to change its course, if it fragments enough then it will burn up in the atmosphere.
I realize that I'm way too old to be complaining about my parents or my upbringing at this point in my life, but it's gone too far. My mom is retired, on SSI, but not enough because she didn't pay enough taxes in her life, little savings, for 10 years has lived in a dilapidated trailer with no hot water, makes it a point to drive dilapidated cars, and completely depends on me to fix these damn messes. My father died years ago and she's alienated us away from the rest of the family so there is no support except for me. She doesn't want to go back to work because she feels like she's too old, and is content with staying where she is in her life and doesn't want to move, however totally impedes me because I would like to improve and move on from where I am in life. She's afraid I will move away and blames me for leaving town if I do. The fact that I live a city away makes her angry and I'm obliged to see her every week. I can't even think about financial success or becoming a little wealthy without first asking myself what to do about my only family member. It's not my fault she's drank her life away and is in this horrible situation, as a kid I didn't want anything to do with her lifestyle but now as a (mostly)able adult I can't fucking escape it because I know how much it hurts to be alone and how much it'd hurt her. At this point I'd rather kill myself than be a slave any longer. Being born into this god forsaken family has doomed me from the start so I do owe it to myself to take what freedom I can get.
>>244227
Same.
I just wish I had a Fast Forward button to do work on auto-pilot and 'wake up' when it's free time.
It really feels like I've lived too long.
Same.
I just wish I had a Fast Forward button to do work on auto-pilot and 'wake up' when it's free time.
It really feels like I've lived too long.
>>244210
You play empty word games only. Humans are animals and that is it. You can resort to mental gymnastics but you won't change the facts that we are evolved monkeys.
>really now
Really now. If you have any idea how we are different from other animals then let's hear them.
>You clearly don't understand what I mean by morality. You can't have a functioning society without some kind of moral principles. Even cavemen had their own moral system, unlike animals. I guess that's only because we are "slightly more intelligent", and not because we are conscious.
Haha! Even monkeys kill those who threaten the group and the majority, there is nothing moral about self-preservation. You are so delusional. What you call "morals" is just self-preservation instinct painted over with buzzwords like goodness, virtue, ethical, moral, etc.
>Humans only evolved about 200,000 years ago.
That is besides the point. Doesn't change that we are animals and no better morally or any kinder than other species.
>>244214
>Christianity didn't set it in stone. As for philosophers, I have no doubt you may have read a buzzfeed article trying to say nihilism was the norm until ebul chrindstams came along.
Ah, it didn't? Then what about all those dogmas and persecuting anyone who thought differently? And like I said some posts above, you don't have to be a nihilist to acknowledge that humans are animals. It is common sense.
>Judaism
Surely Judaism rejecting Christ didn't have to do with Christ himself rejecting everything Judaism stood for? I mean, Jesus was a cool person but he kicked up every kind of tradition. It was natural the jews wanted to kill him, that was the custom among them.
>How do you define that our cousins are monkeys? Can't we be as related to the atoms that we share in stones and dirt? Why do you arbitrarily pick some atoms over others?
This is just brain-farting and word plays, just like that other poster I replied to in this post. Science acknowledges without a doubt that monkeys are our closest relatives on Earth. Why do you people find it so offensive to say that we are animals? Everyone gets pissed or starts some empty argument to prove that "no, my species is something different!".
>>244216
What is your point? We are the most intelligent animals. Why would you advise me to live as a monkey? What would this prove? I don't understand your line of thought.
>youre really helping our moral evolution along with that "humans are no better than animals" idea
I know it is strange for idealistic persons like you but honesty and truth are the first requirements towards bettering our species. We lived in a dreamworld long enough, thinking that we humans were somehow special or chosen by God. Fact is, we are just another species among countless others, like it or not. So if you want to philosophize or in some way moralize even then you should start from the point that humans are animals. Intelligent animals, but still animals.
You play empty word games only. Humans are animals and that is it. You can resort to mental gymnastics but you won't change the facts that we are evolved monkeys.
>really now
Really now. If you have any idea how we are different from other animals then let's hear them.
>You clearly don't understand what I mean by morality. You can't have a functioning society without some kind of moral principles. Even cavemen had their own moral system, unlike animals. I guess that's only because we are "slightly more intelligent", and not because we are conscious.
Haha! Even monkeys kill those who threaten the group and the majority, there is nothing moral about self-preservation. You are so delusional. What you call "morals" is just self-preservation instinct painted over with buzzwords like goodness, virtue, ethical, moral, etc.
>Humans only evolved about 200,000 years ago.
That is besides the point. Doesn't change that we are animals and no better morally or any kinder than other species.
>>244214
>Christianity didn't set it in stone. As for philosophers, I have no doubt you may have read a buzzfeed article trying to say nihilism was the norm until ebul chrindstams came along.
Ah, it didn't? Then what about all those dogmas and persecuting anyone who thought differently? And like I said some posts above, you don't have to be a nihilist to acknowledge that humans are animals. It is common sense.
>Judaism
Surely Judaism rejecting Christ didn't have to do with Christ himself rejecting everything Judaism stood for? I mean, Jesus was a cool person but he kicked up every kind of tradition. It was natural the jews wanted to kill him, that was the custom among them.
>How do you define that our cousins are monkeys? Can't we be as related to the atoms that we share in stones and dirt? Why do you arbitrarily pick some atoms over others?
This is just brain-farting and word plays, just like that other poster I replied to in this post. Science acknowledges without a doubt that monkeys are our closest relatives on Earth. Why do you people find it so offensive to say that we are animals? Everyone gets pissed or starts some empty argument to prove that "no, my species is something different!".
>>244216
What is your point? We are the most intelligent animals. Why would you advise me to live as a monkey? What would this prove? I don't understand your line of thought.
>youre really helping our moral evolution along with that "humans are no better than animals" idea
I know it is strange for idealistic persons like you but honesty and truth are the first requirements towards bettering our species. We lived in a dreamworld long enough, thinking that we humans were somehow special or chosen by God. Fact is, we are just another species among countless others, like it or not. So if you want to philosophize or in some way moralize even then you should start from the point that humans are animals. Intelligent animals, but still animals.
>>244231
>I realize that I'm way too old to be complaining about my parents or my upbringing at this point in my life, but it's gone too far.
I don't think we're ever too old. Most of us were subjected to our parents for the entirety of our brain's development, and we either never moved out or we're still connected to our parents because not everyone's a Chad Wizard that would just cut them off from their lives. Plus they can fuck us by proxy with debt or something.
I don't envy your situation, mine's not too bad but I also suspect my mother would rather see me sink than lose the chess-piece I am. Life's so tiresome. I'll be a Wizard next year and it just looks like there's no future for me to look forward to, while also realizing I hate every day of the past. Just want oblivion.
>I realize that I'm way too old to be complaining about my parents or my upbringing at this point in my life, but it's gone too far.
I don't think we're ever too old. Most of us were subjected to our parents for the entirety of our brain's development, and we either never moved out or we're still connected to our parents because not everyone's a Chad Wizard that would just cut them off from their lives. Plus they can fuck us by proxy with debt or something.
I don't envy your situation, mine's not too bad but I also suspect my mother would rather see me sink than lose the chess-piece I am. Life's so tiresome. I'll be a Wizard next year and it just looks like there's no future for me to look forward to, while also realizing I hate every day of the past. Just want oblivion.
File: 1626782932629.mp4 (3.15 MB, 350x466, 175:233, zWMGZVz.mp4) ImgOps iqdb
>>244233
>You play empty word games only.
But it is you who denies everything.
We evolved from earlier creatures, each on a unique trajectory through time. We share DNA with all the organisms that have ever existed the proteins our genes encrypt utilise a code that is indistinguishable from that in an amoeba or a zebu.
Just like animals that are more complex than unicellular organisms, we are one step above.
There are of course no steps and boundaries, evolution is a constant process. That why equating humans with animals and not with everything else is wrong, through a human perspective we are not part of the whole, even though we made out of the same matter.
Humans have the ability to reason upon certain things, and are driven by instincts, intellect, and logic. Animals cannot reason, but they are only driven by their instincts.
Saying that there is no difference between intelligent life forms and instinct driven animals is like saying that there is no difference between animals and amoebae.
>Haha! Even monkeys kill those who threaten
Wow, I guess human beings (just like monkeys) only care about self preservation and simply follow their instincts.. Wait a minute, why do people contemplate suicide here all the time, you imbecile? Aren't we animals? Shouldn't we all follow our instincts to survive and reproduce?
>That is besides the point. Doesn't change that we are animals and no better morally or any kinder than other species.
Why do you equate humans with animals and not with all the other life forms, I don't understand. Said mammals are just more complex and intelligent fish.
>You play empty word games only.
But it is you who denies everything.
We evolved from earlier creatures, each on a unique trajectory through time. We share DNA with all the organisms that have ever existed the proteins our genes encrypt utilise a code that is indistinguishable from that in an amoeba or a zebu.
Just like animals that are more complex than unicellular organisms, we are one step above.
There are of course no steps and boundaries, evolution is a constant process. That why equating humans with animals and not with everything else is wrong, through a human perspective we are not part of the whole, even though we made out of the same matter.
Humans have the ability to reason upon certain things, and are driven by instincts, intellect, and logic. Animals cannot reason, but they are only driven by their instincts.
Saying that there is no difference between intelligent life forms and instinct driven animals is like saying that there is no difference between animals and amoebae.
>Haha! Even monkeys kill those who threaten
Wow, I guess human beings (just like monkeys) only care about self preservation and simply follow their instincts.. Wait a minute, why do people contemplate suicide here all the time, you imbecile? Aren't we animals? Shouldn't we all follow our instincts to survive and reproduce?
>That is besides the point. Doesn't change that we are animals and no better morally or any kinder than other species.
Why do you equate humans with animals and not with all the other life forms, I don't understand. Said mammals are just more complex and intelligent fish.
>>244353
If this is not shitposting, you should bought up gpd win 3 and spare ssd instead, at least this thing is useful.
If this is not shitposting, you should bought up gpd win 3 and spare ssd instead, at least this thing is useful.
>>244354
When low on cash but you get a sudden windfall, always spend it on something that will bring joy for years.
The worst thing to do is to blow it on food or drink which dissipates within days or weeks.
When low on cash but you get a sudden windfall, always spend it on something that will bring joy for years.
The worst thing to do is to blow it on food or drink which dissipates within days or weeks.
Spend the last month dieting and exercising, stepped on the scale and haven't lost a single pound. There is nothing more spirit crushing than putting effort into something and getting no results.
I hate how clumsy I was born to be sexhavers with no time on there hands destroy me at everything even other wizards point my subhuman clumsiness I should have never played online again
>>244518
I'm addicted to gacha I didn't even fight anyone is something they added in a update I couldn't figure out for like hours and it demoralised me how simple it was but I couldn't figure out sooner
I'm addicted to gacha I didn't even fight anyone is something they added in a update I couldn't figure out for like hours and it demoralised me how simple it was but I couldn't figure out sooner
File: 1627406424897.png (326.85 KB, 635x679, 635:679, 60FCAF35-FA1C-480E-A736-5C….png) ImgOps iqdb
>>244561
>gacha
THEY ARENT EVEN FUN WHAT THE FUCK IS THERE TO BE ADDICTED TO IVE TRIED THEM AND THEY ALL FUCKING SUCK
>gacha
THEY ARENT EVEN FUN WHAT THE FUCK IS THERE TO BE ADDICTED TO IVE TRIED THEM AND THEY ALL FUCKING SUCK
>>244562
I dunno I have played gacha more than anything in both my PSP,Vita and 3DS combined rarely games have the kind of characters I like(edgelords and lolis)
I dunno I have played gacha more than anything in both my PSP,Vita and 3DS combined rarely games have the kind of characters I like(edgelords and lolis)
Found out I have low insulin sensitivity. I'm not overweight but somehow this happened.
Problem is my parents do not care at all and they said I will have to eat whatever they stock. It's all candy, bread and cereal. Why does this shit keep happening to me? Why is all news I get bad?
Problem is my parents do not care at all and they said I will have to eat whatever they stock. It's all candy, bread and cereal. Why does this shit keep happening to me? Why is all news I get bad?
File: 1627594538975.gif (736.39 KB, 451x322, 451:322, 1574140361690.gif) ImgOps iqdb
Having old parents sucks. Why even have a child when you're 50. Growing up around their mental illnesses has seriously damaged me, and I've always wanted to cut them out once I got my independence, but seeing them slowly walk to their graves still hurts. At this point I feel like I should just endure these last few years even though it seriously pains me to even have contact with them. I don't know what to do.
This is not a good life, yet I keep pushing it. But everything has its limits, one day I'll reach the edge. Something is telling me that day is coming soon, I'm ready to face the void but I can't help to feel sorrow for my fucked up journey.
>jumps into forex with zero knowledge
>lose 1/3 of my capital in 10 minutes
>my data must have been sold because people pretending to be pretty succubi are contacting my number to sell gambling sites
This is why I am a failure. Time to try shitcoins I guess.
>lose 1/3 of my capital in 10 minutes
>my data must have been sold because people pretending to be pretty succubi are contacting my number to sell gambling sites
This is why I am a failure. Time to try shitcoins I guess.
I just realized most people in /r9k/ are still in their early 20s and I'm a total outcast there, whenever I post about my life people are shocked. Time to quit 4chan for good and make wizchan my main imageboard, this is the only place I belong anymore. And even here I'm kind of unconfortable and feel you guys are more "normal" than me.
>>244726
Yeah, 4chan is way too young now and has people with normal lives that are just having a bad day. It’s insane.
Yeah, 4chan is way too young now and has people with normal lives that are just having a bad day. It’s insane.
I can't take being a neurotic loser with below average intelligence.I want to end it ASAP but too scared I'll fuck everything up like I always do.
Life is ridiculous no one asked to be born i don't know how most people aren't depressed. those normies who are all happy everyday really piss me off.
I hate being a narcisist. Why god do this with us? I live with my depressed mom and i'm in my 20's, don't know what to do. Tried helping others but is not what i'm mean to do. I Just need Help, i just need a job and not being depressed anymore, i've tried literally everything on this 3rd wolrd country. I hate being a Brazilian monkey. FUCK!
>>244730
I don't know how people can delude themselves. Tired of everything, the greatest pleasure are always fleeting and proceeded by greater pain period.I wish I could be delude myself like a normal fag.
I don't know how people can delude themselves. Tired of everything, the greatest pleasure are always fleeting and proceeded by greater pain period.I wish I could be delude myself like a normal fag.
>>244730
Most people aren't really happy either. They live on auto-pilot mode, they never questioned anything about life, existence or society.
Anyway, if you want to be happy learn to control your thoughts and feelings. Always be 100% conscious, always be in control. It is a matter of discipline. Not that hard.
>>244737
At first, but then your body gets used to them so what will you do? Up the dosage? Or use stronger drugs? Drugs don't solve anything, they don't give meaning to life, they don't change your perspective on things, they just give you more energy (at first, anyway).
Most people aren't really happy either. They live on auto-pilot mode, they never questioned anything about life, existence or society.
Anyway, if you want to be happy learn to control your thoughts and feelings. Always be 100% conscious, always be in control. It is a matter of discipline. Not that hard.
>>244737
At first, but then your body gets used to them so what will you do? Up the dosage? Or use stronger drugs? Drugs don't solve anything, they don't give meaning to life, they don't change your perspective on things, they just give you more energy (at first, anyway).
>>244732
There is no god. As you will notice over the years, life is just a random chaotic shitty mess of a planet with no reason to it.
There is no god. As you will notice over the years, life is just a random chaotic shitty mess of a planet with no reason to it.
>>244740
Nothing can give real meaning to life. Happiness can only be found by accepting and embracing that there is no meaning; anything else is temporary delusion that will inevitably collapse. It is possible to enjoy the little things in life, no matter how transitory or "meaningless".
>At first, but then your body gets used to them so what will you do? Up the dosage?
It is erroneous drug war propaganda that the effect of recreational drugs is constantly diminishing. Tolerance doesn't increase forever. Even if it did, is no reason to avoid enjoyable things. There is quite literally no drawback to taking e.g. heroin twice a week.
Nothing can give real meaning to life. Happiness can only be found by accepting and embracing that there is no meaning; anything else is temporary delusion that will inevitably collapse. It is possible to enjoy the little things in life, no matter how transitory or "meaningless".
>At first, but then your body gets used to them so what will you do? Up the dosage?
It is erroneous drug war propaganda that the effect of recreational drugs is constantly diminishing. Tolerance doesn't increase forever. Even if it did, is no reason to avoid enjoyable things. There is quite literally no drawback to taking e.g. heroin twice a week.
>>244740
Drugs do change your perspective. They dull the senses enough to allow simply existing to be pleasant for a brief window.
Drugs do change your perspective. They dull the senses enough to allow simply existing to be pleasant for a brief window.
File: 1627696592200.webm (1.96 MB, 404x720, 101:180, 1627674558203.webm) ImgOps iqdb
Holy shit, I just found out about FNF (Friday Night Funkin) and apparently it's the new hip thing among zoomers. But what is worse is that this shit made Newgrounds popular again and now every 12yold knows about that site, they have absolutely ruined it for me by turning it into Tumblr 2.0. Newgrounds was my childhood and now it's gone. Nowhere is safe, nowhere to go. Fuck zoomers.
>>244753
don't know what that is, but newgrounds was always a website for kids, things change, some 30 year old thought your early 2000s newgrounds memes where retarded too, you've swapped places, instead of the kid you once knew you're now the jaded oldfuck mumbling about "kids these days" with a permanent scowl etched in his face
don't know what that is, but newgrounds was always a website for kids, things change, some 30 year old thought your early 2000s newgrounds memes where retarded too, you've swapped places, instead of the kid you once knew you're now the jaded oldfuck mumbling about "kids these days" with a permanent scowl etched in his face
>>244754
Lol, I'm still in my (late) twenties.
>was always a website for kids
It wasn't that much different from the rest of the Internet at the time.
> some 30 year old thought your early 2000s newgrounds memes
I doubt it, teens were even edgier in the 90s.
>about "kids these days" with a permanent scowl etched in his face
You are delusional. Things change so rapidly that even younger people can see it.
Lol, I'm still in my (late) twenties.
>was always a website for kids
It wasn't that much different from the rest of the Internet at the time.
> some 30 year old thought your early 2000s newgrounds memes
I doubt it, teens were even edgier in the 90s.
>about "kids these days" with a permanent scowl etched in his face
You are delusional. Things change so rapidly that even younger people can see it.
tooth decay spread to my gums and now it's spread to my ears ;-; migranes all day and can't eat anything solid because it hurts… a sign that it's infected my body and soon my bloodstream or brain. I am ready to throw in the towel
>>244761
Next time brush and floss your teeth, just literally do it once a day and you're good.
Next time brush and floss your teeth, just literally do it once a day and you're good.
>>244761
Thanks for reminding me I need to go to a denting. I already have 11 fillings, one molar is missing and I need at least 5 more.
Thanks for reminding me I need to go to a denting. I already have 11 fillings, one molar is missing and I need at least 5 more.
>>244784
Everything in this comment is so obviously wrong that i dont know how to respond. It's like saying water is poisonous. Take a drug and see what happens, or think about the whole medical industry
Everything in this comment is so obviously wrong that i dont know how to respond. It's like saying water is poisonous. Take a drug and see what happens, or think about the whole medical industry
>>244785
I got drugs for my depression, they didn't do anything after a couple of days. They don't solve your problems, it is like being an alcoholic and expecting that somehow your life will get better.
>>244786
No, I suppose you wouldn't care about achieving anything, if so why are you still alive? Achievement is what you define it as. Enjoying life again can be considered an achievement too.
I got drugs for my depression, they didn't do anything after a couple of days. They don't solve your problems, it is like being an alcoholic and expecting that somehow your life will get better.
>>244786
No, I suppose you wouldn't care about achieving anything, if so why are you still alive? Achievement is what you define it as. Enjoying life again can be considered an achievement too.
>>244787
>>244787
>I got drugs for my depression, they didn't do anything after a couple of days. They don't solve your problems, it is like being an alcoholic and expecting that somehow your life will get better.
Those are shit placebo drugs. The word "drug" encompasses a whole fucking world of chemicals with an enormous range of effects and consequences
>>244787
>I got drugs for my depression, they didn't do anything after a couple of days. They don't solve your problems, it is like being an alcoholic and expecting that somehow your life will get better.
Those are shit placebo drugs. The word "drug" encompasses a whole fucking world of chemicals with an enormous range of effects and consequences
>>244787
>I got drugs for my depression, they didn't do anything after a couple of days
Most antidepressants take a few weeks to start working, taking them for a couple days does nothing, you've got no right to say you've experienced their effects
>I got drugs for my depression, they didn't do anything after a couple of days
Most antidepressants take a few weeks to start working, taking them for a couple days does nothing, you've got no right to say you've experienced their effects
>>244784
Just discovered I'm immune to cannabis. I'm ought to test other drugs. It will be a fun ride!
Guess I'm an exception to your argument.
Just discovered I'm immune to cannabis. I'm ought to test other drugs. It will be a fun ride!
Guess I'm an exception to your argument.
>>244788
Seems like you don't want anything in life, why bother to live then?
>>244796
>>244807
>>244808
>>244809
Depending on drugs for happiness is no different from alcoholism, sex-addiction or any other addiction. You are only happy as long as you engage in doing whatever you are addicted to, and you need more and more of it eventually. This will lead to more suffering than pleasure in the long run. You can't justify doing drugs. Only weak and miserable losers turn to drugs.
And yes, I have a right to say antidepressants are shit. They only managed to make my dick go limp, they didn't give meaning to my life or solve my troubles. They gave some amount of energy but that is all. They are the easy answer so I guess lazy people like you might resort to them instead of actually fixing your lives.
Seems like you don't want anything in life, why bother to live then?
>>244796
>>244807
>>244808
>>244809
Depending on drugs for happiness is no different from alcoholism, sex-addiction or any other addiction. You are only happy as long as you engage in doing whatever you are addicted to, and you need more and more of it eventually. This will lead to more suffering than pleasure in the long run. You can't justify doing drugs. Only weak and miserable losers turn to drugs.
And yes, I have a right to say antidepressants are shit. They only managed to make my dick go limp, they didn't give meaning to my life or solve my troubles. They gave some amount of energy but that is all. They are the easy answer so I guess lazy people like you might resort to them instead of actually fixing your lives.
>>244830
Agree somewhat, most drugs just numb you so you don't bother with the underlying issue. What about drugs that could help you improve?
Agree somewhat, most drugs just numb you so you don't bother with the underlying issue. What about drugs that could help you improve?
File: 1627834436182.jpeg (38.66 KB, 242x236, 121:118, 2FB67408-3B97-4CF7-8EED-4….jpeg) ImgOps iqdb
>>244830
It never stops being funny seeing you holier than thou faggots come to preach on the depression board.
It never stops being funny seeing you holier than thou faggots come to preach on the depression board.
>>244831
I don't think there is any drug that could help. If you don't look for a meaning for your life, if you don't set values for yourself, a clear yes or no to things, or don't make any effort to solve your problems then life will always suck for you. You may feel good for an hour or so when you do drugs but after that you are back to reality. It is just better to face your demons instead of running away from them.
>>244832
Doing drugs is a symptom, that something just isn't right with you. Healthy people don't need to increase their dopamin levels by force.
I don't think there is any drug that could help. If you don't look for a meaning for your life, if you don't set values for yourself, a clear yes or no to things, or don't make any effort to solve your problems then life will always suck for you. You may feel good for an hour or so when you do drugs but after that you are back to reality. It is just better to face your demons instead of running away from them.
>>244832
Doing drugs is a symptom, that something just isn't right with you. Healthy people don't need to increase their dopamin levels by force.
File: 1627835658274.jpeg (33.87 KB, 253x233, 253:233, 634A1A9E-3B0D-4770-A91A-F….jpeg) ImgOps iqdb
>>244834
> that something just isn't right with you.
Thanks doc, never would’ve figured that one out on my own.
> that something just isn't right with you.
Thanks doc, never would’ve figured that one out on my own.
File: 1627841823367.pdf (950.06 KB, meditations.pdf)
>>244836
If you want your mind to stand independently from the pleasures and pains of the broader world, read 'meditations'. Skip the author's and translator's shit in the first 25 pages. You may even enjoy it, it is a sombre work.
ps, cute furry girls
If you want your mind to stand independently from the pleasures and pains of the broader world, read 'meditations'. Skip the author's and translator's shit in the first 25 pages. You may even enjoy it, it is a sombre work.
ps, cute furry girls
>>244836
If you know what your problems are then why don't you face them? Why do you run to drugs like a coward succubus instead of facing the abyss?
If you know what your problems are then why don't you face them? Why do you run to drugs like a coward succubus instead of facing the abyss?
File: 1627852178537.jpg (410.6 KB, 1920x1920, 1:1, yuu_chi.jpg) ImgOps iqdb
Psychedelic treatment could be the surest way to cure people of their ills, but not within the paradigm of whatever-the-fuck-hellscape-we're-living-in. That wouldn't be curing them, but maintaining what made them ill to begin with.
The guy who is battling spirits with a twig halfway up a windswept mountain is the person to administer this treatment, nobody else. It wouldn't even be called a treatment, but a pilgrimage.
The guy who is battling spirits with a twig halfway up a windswept mountain is the person to administer this treatment, nobody else. It wouldn't even be called a treatment, but a pilgrimage.
>>244834
I consider myself happy and long ago accepted that there is no meaning to life. I prefer that life has no meaning, objective meaning would be like an unwanted responsibility. In my depressed phase I sought meaning and irrationally saw meaninglessness as a bad thing due to social propaganda that needs to be unlearned.
Occasionally taking drugs enhances my life. It is fascinating to modify your perceptive and experience new things. There are so many different drugs and combinations, it is just so interesting. I can't imagine why you would not want to have novel, enjoyable experiences - I guess you'd have to be a very boring person that's afraid of your own mind because of your demons. Depressed people struggle to handle drugs and have bad trips etc, but you have faced your demons then it is all good; so quite the opposite of what you are saying
I consider myself happy and long ago accepted that there is no meaning to life. I prefer that life has no meaning, objective meaning would be like an unwanted responsibility. In my depressed phase I sought meaning and irrationally saw meaninglessness as a bad thing due to social propaganda that needs to be unlearned.
Occasionally taking drugs enhances my life. It is fascinating to modify your perceptive and experience new things. There are so many different drugs and combinations, it is just so interesting. I can't imagine why you would not want to have novel, enjoyable experiences - I guess you'd have to be a very boring person that's afraid of your own mind because of your demons. Depressed people struggle to handle drugs and have bad trips etc, but you have faced your demons then it is all good; so quite the opposite of what you are saying
>>244866
Why depend on external things for happiness when they come and go? It is better to rely on yourself entirely. Drugs can be addictive, I saw lots of persons who destroyed their lives with them, most of them became criminals or ended up in the loony bin. The momentary pleasure they bring with themselves can't equal the misery and suffering they can cause you.
>meaning
I am very sure there is a meaning, and that is to reduce suffering in every way and form. Reducing pain and suffering should be the goal of every person.
Why depend on external things for happiness when they come and go? It is better to rely on yourself entirely. Drugs can be addictive, I saw lots of persons who destroyed their lives with them, most of them became criminals or ended up in the loony bin. The momentary pleasure they bring with themselves can't equal the misery and suffering they can cause you.
>meaning
I am very sure there is a meaning, and that is to reduce suffering in every way and form. Reducing pain and suffering should be the goal of every person.
God, I fucking hate those shitty zoomer memes. Trollface and forever alone crap were bad enough but this shit is just worst.
>>245024
yeah its like they just looked up the definition of irony and think its funny to do that all day, really old and boring
yeah its like they just looked up the definition of irony and think its funny to do that all day, really old and boring
>>245049
It's always always always normalfags. I can't put more emphasis on it. They show up, get their feelings hurt by people who didn't have everything handed to them from birth and start giving out "advice" because they think of themselves as angels. But when you call out their shitty advice they just reveal how they really think of you - That you're just a worthless ball of slime in their eyes
It's always always always normalfags. I can't put more emphasis on it. They show up, get their feelings hurt by people who didn't have everything handed to them from birth and start giving out "advice" because they think of themselves as angels. But when you call out their shitty advice they just reveal how they really think of you - That you're just a worthless ball of slime in their eyes
File: 1628160934941.webm (9.99 MB, 620x348, 155:87, 1627689584787.webm) ImgOps iqdb
The Anarchists and the Nihilists want a tabula rasa and the future shall prove them right. But the Order crushes and shall crush them. As long as it subsists, the Order which protects us shall protect us from subversion, but not from chaos and death, against which it commands us to march, in squad formation, one against the other, at a charge of attack into the night that we shall soon bathe in blood.
The most fortunate men shall die fighting, and the most miserable, crammed in the bottom of basements or coupling in ardour, as to deceive agony, aided by the orgasm. The world shall be nothing but a howl of pain and ecstasy, and the purest among men shall only be able to avoid self-contempt by resorting to weariness. The choice of agony will be the only choice left, and this will be sooner than we expect.
The most fortunate men shall die fighting, and the most miserable, crammed in the bottom of basements or coupling in ardour, as to deceive agony, aided by the orgasm. The world shall be nothing but a howl of pain and ecstasy, and the purest among men shall only be able to avoid self-contempt by resorting to weariness. The choice of agony will be the only choice left, and this will be sooner than we expect.
File: 1628163238288.gif (213.15 KB, 300x300, 1:1, 0.gif) ImgOps iqdb
>>243965
>>243949
>>243941
I'm so tired of everything
Even here pseudo-intelectual normies shit out their mediocre opinions and ideas as if they had any value whatsoever
Every time I interact (or at least try to) with other humans I get stuck in this loop of "cringe" because you are all so insufferably pathetic
>>243949
>>243941
I'm so tired of everything
Even here pseudo-intelectual normies shit out their mediocre opinions and ideas as if they had any value whatsoever
Every time I interact (or at least try to) with other humans I get stuck in this loop of "cringe" because you are all so insufferably pathetic
My grandfather fell and now I am asked to sleep in the same room with him in case something happens again. It's supposed to be only for a few days but I now consider the possibility of his condition deteriorating further in the future and I'll be asked as the residential NEET to be his personal nurse, changing his diaper and communicating with a mental case on a daily basis. I am probably overthinking it but if it ever got to that point I am going to be plotting his death. Even wageslaving would be a better fate and I am not going back there. I'll be a murderer for my freedom. I'll kill my enslaver.
It's as though the universe is telling me to kill myself. Every project falls through. Every investment goes red. Health just keeps getting worse.
I'm begging for anything to keep me going. Any path, anything to pass the time. But I can't find anything. I don't want to die. But it's not like I have a choice now
I'm beg
I'm begging for anything to keep me going. Any path, anything to pass the time. But I can't find anything. I don't want to die. But it's not like I have a choice now
I'm beg
I feel like suicide is less of a choice and more of a question of how much suffering you can endure before you want death so much you kill yourself. I hear people more mentally resilient than me talk about how faith, discipline, mindfulness etc helps them get through life but I find it hard to believe that these traits are all-powerful. What if you put a religious zealot in a torture dungeon where the only escape is suicide? What if you beat the shit out of a stoic until he admits he has no control over his distress? Sure Epictetus was a slave and there are extreme ascetics who went through a lot of pain voluntarily but these are the peak of human resilience and thinking that you can be like them is thinking that you can be a genius scientist or the richest man in the world. Ascetics are proof that suffering can be overcame with will, not proof that YOU can overcome suffering with will.
I used to be a hard materialist who thinks that death is the end but I've now grown agnostic and unsure. But even then, I don't think I could ever take the Pascal's wager. If my life is painful enough, I will kill myself. If my suffering can be alleviated by taking advantage of others, I will milk them dry and hurt them. I lack the will to endure suffering. This is like a perverted version of Pascal's wager, a wager that hell doesn't exist so that I don't have to suffer as much in life.
I used to be a hard materialist who thinks that death is the end but I've now grown agnostic and unsure. But even then, I don't think I could ever take the Pascal's wager. If my life is painful enough, I will kill myself. If my suffering can be alleviated by taking advantage of others, I will milk them dry and hurt them. I lack the will to endure suffering. This is like a perverted version of Pascal's wager, a wager that hell doesn't exist so that I don't have to suffer as much in life.
File: 1628200150244.jpg (1.76 MB, 4500x2781, 500:309, 60df50b9855f068f923a9bba42….jpg) ImgOps iqdb
>>245106
The stoics and ascetics made themselves tyrants over suffering, denying themselves and their lives, as the problem isn't so much pain itself but the meaninglessness of pain. Even a sickly will can endure much by exerting power over itself in this way.
When we made those bulwarks of faith, discipline, and mindfulness we carved out kingdoms for ourselves in the sand, but the sea is merciless. My feeling is it's better to accept suicide as a source of comfort, as without the power to kill ourselves we would lose the will to live, and in that way embrace the black sea as part of living without stoic or ascetic denial.
The stoics and ascetics made themselves tyrants over suffering, denying themselves and their lives, as the problem isn't so much pain itself but the meaninglessness of pain. Even a sickly will can endure much by exerting power over itself in this way.
When we made those bulwarks of faith, discipline, and mindfulness we carved out kingdoms for ourselves in the sand, but the sea is merciless. My feeling is it's better to accept suicide as a source of comfort, as without the power to kill ourselves we would lose the will to live, and in that way embrace the black sea as part of living without stoic or ascetic denial.
File: 1628203470383.jpg (69.05 KB, 629x634, 629:634, divine-light-severed-autom….jpg) ImgOps iqdb
>>245106
Mental resillience, in my opinion, is just a series of coping mechanisms meant to take your attention away and ignore the pain that you'll endure and the looming void of pure nihilism that death is till you reach it. Some are just more upfront with the realization than others or just straight up refuse to acknowledge its existence.
Mental resillience, in my opinion, is just a series of coping mechanisms meant to take your attention away and ignore the pain that you'll endure and the looming void of pure nihilism that death is till you reach it. Some are just more upfront with the realization than others or just straight up refuse to acknowledge its existence.
File: 1628326834724.png (1.69 MB, 1366x768, 683:384, ClipboardImage.png) ImgOps iqdb
im living in my own world now. im separate from everything else, all alone.
im finally free. every day is a dream.
goodbye to this world.
im finally free. every day is a dream.
goodbye to this world.
>>245180
>im living in my own world now. im separate from everything else, all alone.
>im finally free.
I'll try my best not to be jealous.
>im living in my own world now. im separate from everything else, all alone.
>im finally free.
I'll try my best not to be jealous.
>>245118
There's something very wrong here. We got horror at being a flesh automaton. There's resistance and endurance. There's the objective realization of an eternal realm of nothingness. We got inevitability, a looming dread of death. Can we also say there's the assumption that reality is deterministic and atomic?
What is all this? In denying one's perspective in the service of objectivity we have another kind of asceticism. I see down in the depths of this void a flicker of the divine light, the idea of heaven has concealed itself again in the opposite idea. The horror at this realization only follows if this world of suffering is bad compared to another world of nothingness, but if that other world never existed to begin with what is there to be horrified by? When we resist and endure, what are we pushing against? Death? The divide between this world and nothingness hinging on our deaths is ours alone, and yet we've managed to tie universal objectivity to this entirely human event.
There's something very wrong here. We got horror at being a flesh automaton. There's resistance and endurance. There's the objective realization of an eternal realm of nothingness. We got inevitability, a looming dread of death. Can we also say there's the assumption that reality is deterministic and atomic?
What is all this? In denying one's perspective in the service of objectivity we have another kind of asceticism. I see down in the depths of this void a flicker of the divine light, the idea of heaven has concealed itself again in the opposite idea. The horror at this realization only follows if this world of suffering is bad compared to another world of nothingness, but if that other world never existed to begin with what is there to be horrified by? When we resist and endure, what are we pushing against? Death? The divide between this world and nothingness hinging on our deaths is ours alone, and yet we've managed to tie universal objectivity to this entirely human event.
This is the end of the rope. I can't leave the bed anymore without feeling like shit immediately. Life's not enjoyable. I'm extremely anxious. I'm even hesitant to post here these days and it never was an issue in the past. I don't feel comfortable here or elsewhere. I never thought it could get this bad but now I feel like my brain is fried. I have nothing to say either. I just wish I could stop time but it always keeps rolling forward and eats me alive.
I don't mean this to be too depressing but I have always seen suicide as beautiful and romanticized. Welcome to the NHK's attempted suicides of Misaki and her mother long ago are examples of this. A cliff and a sunset is a beautiful scene for a depressing act. Regardless of the pain and suffering the victim and their family go through, I feel depressed people romanticize the act to cope. I have probably picked it up as well. I will likely die from suicide whether I am happy or sad because of this feeling. When I see something beautiful and feel good, I want to end it on a high note.
Antone else feel similarly?
Antone else feel similarly?
>>245274
I do. In my eyes, the beauty of death is that it's an affirmation of one's existence, the next step after the cogito - by defying the animalistic instict of self-preservation and commiting suicide, man proves that he is above beasts, that he is master of his own flesh, an individual, a "human" if you will. Among the few actions man is capable of that have objective meaning, suicide is at the very peak in every regard.
Suicide is a dear friend to be embraced with joy and laughter. It baffles me that blunts go to it with tears, refusing to meet it's gaze by looking behind themselves with suicide notes and regrets, like whipped dogs returning to their abusive master because they're too weak to survive on their own. I would call it insanity, but that would imply they are willing or even capable of considering the matter rationally.
I do. In my eyes, the beauty of death is that it's an affirmation of one's existence, the next step after the cogito - by defying the animalistic instict of self-preservation and commiting suicide, man proves that he is above beasts, that he is master of his own flesh, an individual, a "human" if you will. Among the few actions man is capable of that have objective meaning, suicide is at the very peak in every regard.
Suicide is a dear friend to be embraced with joy and laughter. It baffles me that blunts go to it with tears, refusing to meet it's gaze by looking behind themselves with suicide notes and regrets, like whipped dogs returning to their abusive master because they're too weak to survive on their own. I would call it insanity, but that would imply they are willing or even capable of considering the matter rationally.
File: 1628486660096.jpg (67.96 KB, 877x768, 877:768, 1569113003850.jpg) ImgOps iqdb
>>245281
General lack of testosterone in modern society.
For samurai it was a matter of honor to seppuku for a variety of reasons if you felt there was no reasonable escape from your current life situation.
People who refused to do so were considered absolute cowards and might have been spared their lives, but had to live as outcasts shunned by other people for the rest of their lives.
As a honor based society, Japan didn't really take prisoners of war. They always gave their opponent an out.
If you were defeated gracefully simply due to being outskilled or outmanned, you were given a small sword and expected to disembowel yourself.
Nobody captured you or took you to prison camps.
Honor based societies are dead now. Most people are cowards.
All the extremely brave people, the highly honorable etc. have died in battles or killed themselves for honor reasons.
Genetic selection has vastly favored cowards who stayed out of all of it.
Even most current Japanese alive descend from deserters, draft evaders, meek cowards and lily livered malingerers who avoided WW2 with medical excuses. Samurai lineages have almost died out.
General lack of testosterone in modern society.
For samurai it was a matter of honor to seppuku for a variety of reasons if you felt there was no reasonable escape from your current life situation.
People who refused to do so were considered absolute cowards and might have been spared their lives, but had to live as outcasts shunned by other people for the rest of their lives.
As a honor based society, Japan didn't really take prisoners of war. They always gave their opponent an out.
If you were defeated gracefully simply due to being outskilled or outmanned, you were given a small sword and expected to disembowel yourself.
Nobody captured you or took you to prison camps.
Honor based societies are dead now. Most people are cowards.
All the extremely brave people, the highly honorable etc. have died in battles or killed themselves for honor reasons.
Genetic selection has vastly favored cowards who stayed out of all of it.
Even most current Japanese alive descend from deserters, draft evaders, meek cowards and lily livered malingerers who avoided WW2 with medical excuses. Samurai lineages have almost died out.
>>245286
Pathetic ways lead to exterminated masses. Cowardice has its uses, so does courage… it was pride what poisoned such hearts into doing those stupidities.
Pathetic ways lead to exterminated masses. Cowardice has its uses, so does courage… it was pride what poisoned such hearts into doing those stupidities.
Why can't I start tasks? Anytime I try to do something I get a wave of anxiety. It's been this way for years.
>>245291
For me it was precisely severe anxiety and depression that forced me to change.
I started having such horrible panic attacks in the middle of the night over how fucked up my life and body is, I forced myself to change.
I'm now in better shape and the reason I no longer eat junkfood and why I excercise, is that I never, ever want to have those panic attacks again.
The 5 minutes of pleasure from eating a bunch of potato chips or a cake isn't worth the constant agony of being out of shape.
Whenever I'm in the shop and see those sweets and snacks, I remind myself of that night when I was just trembling in tears and thought I would die any minute.
Works pretty well and I simply don't buy them.
For me it was precisely severe anxiety and depression that forced me to change.
I started having such horrible panic attacks in the middle of the night over how fucked up my life and body is, I forced myself to change.
I'm now in better shape and the reason I no longer eat junkfood and why I excercise, is that I never, ever want to have those panic attacks again.
The 5 minutes of pleasure from eating a bunch of potato chips or a cake isn't worth the constant agony of being out of shape.
Whenever I'm in the shop and see those sweets and snacks, I remind myself of that night when I was just trembling in tears and thought I would die any minute.
Works pretty well and I simply don't buy them.
I can't take this anymore. It's been years I have been trying to make my life bearable, but I never managed to do so. Anxiety and obsessive thoughts plague me every day, no matter what I do. Curse those that say that life is a blessing. It is a curse upon the unlucky. I hope that I will find the courage to end this torture, one day.
The only time of the day where I feel save and at peace is before sleeping and whenever I'm awake at night. The whole day my mind is kind of out of place and lagging behind the reality that haunts me.
File: 1628547989802.gif (821.08 KB, 280x158, 140:79, nicholson.gif) ImgOps iqdb
>>245295
When people tell you to "just do it" when crippling anxiety prohibits you from even leaving the bed. Ugh.
When people tell you to "just do it" when crippling anxiety prohibits you from even leaving the bed. Ugh.
>>245307
Yeah. I really wish there was some straightforward method to end this unhealthy kind of anxiety but unfortunately there aren't any.
Yeah. I really wish there was some straightforward method to end this unhealthy kind of anxiety but unfortunately there aren't any.
>>245306
>The only time of the day where I feel save and at peace is before sleeping and whenever I'm awake at night.
Same. Night and darkness is the only time I feel comfortable enough to be me. It's almost magical how much better I feel when it's pitch-black outside and I can pretend for a hot second there is nobody around at all. I'm constantly torn between wanting to give in and become a permanent night owl, or keeping normal hours so I don't disappear completely. I wonder which would be healthier, in the long run.
>The only time of the day where I feel save and at peace is before sleeping and whenever I'm awake at night.
Same. Night and darkness is the only time I feel comfortable enough to be me. It's almost magical how much better I feel when it's pitch-black outside and I can pretend for a hot second there is nobody around at all. I'm constantly torn between wanting to give in and become a permanent night owl, or keeping normal hours so I don't disappear completely. I wonder which would be healthier, in the long run.
File: 1628570672439.gif (868.24 KB, 500x281, 500:281, 25d6b083264ccd888b6bd27cbc….gif) ImgOps iqdb
>>245317
>text
Thanks, you too!
>text
Thanks, you too!
>>245295
Literally just do it, just take a small step. What is the negative circle jerk doing for you? Just try to do something for like 5-10 mins. You're literally making the tasks seem worse than they actually are.If you can't realize this then just rot.
Literally just do it, just take a small step. What is the negative circle jerk doing for you? Just try to do something for like 5-10 mins. You're literally making the tasks seem worse than they actually are.If you can't realize this then just rot.
>>245281
I no longer find solace in suicide because when I was about to do it and in my dumb feeble mind I planned it, there was no way I could go through with it.
The only times I romanticized and thought suicide was an option was when I hardly faced any challenges aka when I was sheltered
When push came to shove I cowered in fear simply because I'm a pussy, like most people.
If you think you'll suicide in the future you're probably still sheltered.
I no longer find solace in suicide because when I was about to do it and in my dumb feeble mind I planned it, there was no way I could go through with it.
The only times I romanticized and thought suicide was an option was when I hardly faced any challenges aka when I was sheltered
When push came to shove I cowered in fear simply because I'm a pussy, like most people.
If you think you'll suicide in the future you're probably still sheltered.
>>245321
"Just get a job." "Just book an escort". "Just get your own apartment to live in" "Just become normie"
How when leaving the house itself or even talking through chat is an overwhelming task?
"Just get a job." "Just book an escort". "Just get your own apartment to live in" "Just become normie"
How when leaving the house itself or even talking through chat is an overwhelming task?
>>245323
don't engage the normscum.
for some reason they love empty meaningless slogans like 'just be yourself', 'have a positive attitude' or 'just do it'. fuck them
don't engage the normscum.
for some reason they love empty meaningless slogans like 'just be yourself', 'have a positive attitude' or 'just do it'. fuck them
>>245331
Yeah, every site I've been on they practically tell me "get a job, book a prostitute, get friends, bam all your previous problems were solved".
Then I'm supposedly going to magically change, have a family, a 9-5 routine and a dog.
Let's see how normans do this with my autistic brain and body which shuts down if it has to as much as open the door when it's ringing. I don't even answer phone calls.
Yeah, every site I've been on they practically tell me "get a job, book a prostitute, get friends, bam all your previous problems were solved".
Then I'm supposedly going to magically change, have a family, a 9-5 routine and a dog.
Let's see how normans do this with my autistic brain and body which shuts down if it has to as much as open the door when it's ringing. I don't even answer phone calls.
>>245334
>>245331
>>245329
>>245323
My mom keeps taking me to therapists and they all say this same thing lol, they have absolutely no clue how someone could get in to my situation, you tell them you have no friends, never had a job, no connections or any relationship with family and they have no idea what it's like, so all they can say is "just do it" in a lot of different ways. Just do it, say the extroverted female with a PhD and no mental problems to speak of. It's like 95% of the population doesn't know what having a mental illness is like, if you tell them you feel some way they try to relate and say they feel like that sometimes too and you can just tell they have never experienced any significant mental turmoil other than some relationshit or stupid family drama crap. And don't get me started on the fucking normalfag drug addicts whose only problem is that they do drugs and would be perfectly normal had they any self-control whatsoever. Luckily my certain condition has medication to help with the symptoms but it sure doesn't make functional, especially when I'm already so far gone.
>>245331
>>245329
>>245323
My mom keeps taking me to therapists and they all say this same thing lol, they have absolutely no clue how someone could get in to my situation, you tell them you have no friends, never had a job, no connections or any relationship with family and they have no idea what it's like, so all they can say is "just do it" in a lot of different ways. Just do it, say the extroverted female with a PhD and no mental problems to speak of. It's like 95% of the population doesn't know what having a mental illness is like, if you tell them you feel some way they try to relate and say they feel like that sometimes too and you can just tell they have never experienced any significant mental turmoil other than some relationshit or stupid family drama crap. And don't get me started on the fucking normalfag drug addicts whose only problem is that they do drugs and would be perfectly normal had they any self-control whatsoever. Luckily my certain condition has medication to help with the symptoms but it sure doesn't make functional, especially when I'm already so far gone.
>>245335
Yea i have intrusive thoughts, ocd, anxieties. Normies have no clue what any of this is like you can tell because they are so naive and weak.
Yea i have intrusive thoughts, ocd, anxieties. Normies have no clue what any of this is like you can tell because they are so naive and weak.
I'm 30 and I've never read a book. It's no wonder I'm such a social retard even amongst other outcasts. I want to change this but it feels too late, I've basically been living all my life in "F5" mode that is browsing and refreshing the same imageboards over and over, occasionally masturbating to the same 2d succubi, or doing anything to take my mind off anxiety and despair. 30 years of non-living. No memories. Nothing.
Isolation has rot my brain. If I wanted to change, would it be better for me to try becoming a "social" person first or am I actually shooting myself in the foot for that? What should my first book be?
Isolation has rot my brain. If I wanted to change, would it be better for me to try becoming a "social" person first or am I actually shooting myself in the foot for that? What should my first book be?
>>245340
Books are overrated. People love to think that they are some god-like medium when they are basically just low-tech entertainment television the likes of cartoons and anime. Don't waste your time unless you want to boast about how you "read" to your co-workers. And don't get me wrong, I'm not saying books are bad, but if you're not interested then don't bother just because some people deemed it and intellectual hobby that expands your brain or some bullshit.
Books are overrated. People love to think that they are some god-like medium when they are basically just low-tech entertainment television the likes of cartoons and anime. Don't waste your time unless you want to boast about how you "read" to your co-workers. And don't get me wrong, I'm not saying books are bad, but if you're not interested then don't bother just because some people deemed it and intellectual hobby that expands your brain or some bullshit.
>>245342
Not all books are 'entertainment'. A lot of smart people have lived on this planet, a lot of books are the recordings of their thoughts
Not all books are 'entertainment'. A lot of smart people have lived on this planet, a lot of books are the recordings of their thoughts
>>245343
I was going to mention that but I decided to pass because most people merely read fiction. Also my personal opinion is I don't give a shit what some person thought or philosophized about. I personally enjoy technical books but I would hardly classify that as reading(in the form of hobby).
I was going to mention that but I decided to pass because most people merely read fiction. Also my personal opinion is I don't give a shit what some person thought or philosophized about. I personally enjoy technical books but I would hardly classify that as reading(in the form of hobby).
>>245353
>There are many non-fiction, non-technical, non-philosophical books that are both interesting and educational.
Like what? Some literal-who's autobiography? First hand experiences from historical events? Travel blogs? I'm just saying the vast majority of people who claim to read are just consuming fiction and fantasy, they aren't reading to learn anything, they are sniffing their own asses, metaphorically, by telling people they read and claiming that reading makes them smarter.
>did you only read harry potter or something?
I'm not interested in fictional works, like I said I only read technical books when I want to learn something, which I don't consider a hobby because the thing I'm learning about is the hobby, not the book itself.
>There are many non-fiction, non-technical, non-philosophical books that are both interesting and educational.
Like what? Some literal-who's autobiography? First hand experiences from historical events? Travel blogs? I'm just saying the vast majority of people who claim to read are just consuming fiction and fantasy, they aren't reading to learn anything, they are sniffing their own asses, metaphorically, by telling people they read and claiming that reading makes them smarter.
>did you only read harry potter or something?
I'm not interested in fictional works, like I said I only read technical books when I want to learn something, which I don't consider a hobby because the thing I'm learning about is the hobby, not the book itself.
>>245354
This. Reading philosophy is not much different from listening to a good album.
>B..But muh vocabulary
You can expand that by any other well writen book and practice as well.
This. Reading philosophy is not much different from listening to a good album.
>B..But muh vocabulary
You can expand that by any other well writen book and practice as well.
I tried posting in another imageboard (not 4cucks though) and people still think I'm a worthless retard there, the same happens pretty much everywhere I go.
I wonder why I have to be alive if the world hates me so much, fucking world should have let me die in the womb.
I wonder why I have to be alive if the world hates me so much, fucking world should have let me die in the womb.
The medication I take for my mental disorder is causing diffuse balding, probably about 2x the normal rate of usual hair fall. My drain trap in the shower gets filled with hair so quickly now, I can run my hands through my hair and consistently get 2-3 shed hairs, hair falls onto my shoulder and face throughout the day and it's never happened this often before, even noticed eyebrow hairs on my face that had fallen out. The medication has helped me greatly with no other side effects than this, but I can't deal with hair loss, it makes me depressed, not depressed because of my illness, but because I don't want my hair to fall out. I don't know what to do, so far it hasn't been too long so there are no bald spots, but I know soon enough I will have some at this rate. I just wish my brain was normal, there is no medication without side effects, I thought I found the perfect medication, but my hair is fucking falling out.
It feels like time has been accelerating. Years feel like months, months feel like weeks, weeks feel like days.
>>244159
I'm an athiest, not some Christcuck, muslim or kike, and I still don't believe in evolution, what now redditor?
I'm an athiest, not some Christcuck, muslim or kike, and I still don't believe in evolution, what now redditor?
>>245440
do you have any better ideas on how we came to be? no? nothing? just some big old dude? genius.
do you have any better ideas on how we came to be? no? nothing? just some big old dude? genius.
>>245442
>if you don't believe in a fucking fairytale thats supposed to keep tards from not killing themselves out of no purpose then you're a fedora redditor!!!
face the facts, religion was only created to keep tards like you to believe and be gullible in dumb shit but in reality we are created by evolution, we humans evolved like this because of the environment and we had the DNA capable too.
>if you don't believe in a fucking fairytale thats supposed to keep tards from not killing themselves out of no purpose then you're a fedora redditor!!!
face the facts, religion was only created to keep tards like you to believe and be gullible in dumb shit but in reality we are created by evolution, we humans evolved like this because of the environment and we had the DNA capable too.
>>245443
>religion was only created to keep tards like you to believe and be gullible in dumb shit
So this is one of the ways you cope with your mediocrity, ok
>religion was only created to keep tards like you to believe and be gullible in dumb shit
So this is one of the ways you cope with your mediocrity, ok
>>245444
not really, i just like to see proof and facts. stop projecting your dumb shit on me because i don't believe in a bearded retard.
not really, i just like to see proof and facts. stop projecting your dumb shit on me because i don't believe in a bearded retard.
>>245443
While not ever being atheist, I was a formerly very sinful person; but God has shown me several times revelations of His power. God exists, my wizard friend.
While not ever being atheist, I was a formerly very sinful person; but God has shown me several times revelations of His power. God exists, my wizard friend.
>>245447
There is no such thing as sin, what is sin? Things you obtain by doing bad and horrible stuff which should be common sense not to do anyways? Aslong as it doesn't break the law, sin is meaningless. You can be a degenerate and nothing will happen aslong as you don't harm others in the way. I don't think i'll ever understand being subjected to a obvious lie but if that is what helps you in life then I don't have the right to judge, all i'm just saying is evolution is real and way realer than religion.
There is no such thing as sin, what is sin? Things you obtain by doing bad and horrible stuff which should be common sense not to do anyways? Aslong as it doesn't break the law, sin is meaningless. You can be a degenerate and nothing will happen aslong as you don't harm others in the way. I don't think i'll ever understand being subjected to a obvious lie but if that is what helps you in life then I don't have the right to judge, all i'm just saying is evolution is real and way realer than religion.
>>245449
Number synchronicities out the wazoo like so many I just knew it was God. Saved my life honestly
Number synchronicities out the wazoo like so many I just knew it was God. Saved my life honestly
>>245442
religious fags are in the biggest denial ever. Theres no afterlife and life is pointless, get over it.
religious fags are in the biggest denial ever. Theres no afterlife and life is pointless, get over it.
>>245471
No afterlife with infinite time? I doubt it. No such thing as a first or last second.
No afterlife with infinite time? I doubt it. No such thing as a first or last second.
>>245485
That's just rebirth then. He means it in the religious sense where your "soul" travels to another world and lives there.
That's just rebirth then. He means it in the religious sense where your "soul" travels to another world and lives there.
>>245471
How can you say for certain there is no afterlife or other worlds and dimensions? I'm not religious, I don't believe in gods but I do believe that life will continue on in some form after departing from this world.
How can you say for certain there is no afterlife or other worlds and dimensions? I'm not religious, I don't believe in gods but I do believe that life will continue on in some form after departing from this world.
>>245493
Then you're actually retarded, mentally stunted or something. Sorry, don't think there's any other way to put it.
Then you're actually retarded, mentally stunted or something. Sorry, don't think there's any other way to put it.
>>245502
You can't say for sure because it's beyond what we can observe and measure. Known unknowns and unknown unknowns and all that crap.
You can't say for sure because it's beyond what we can observe and measure. Known unknowns and unknown unknowns and all that crap.
>>245502
We incarnate all over again, sometimes we repeat our lives and sometimes we assume completely new personalities and become entirely different individuals or even animals, demons, etc. We are searching for something, and that something can't be found in a single life-time on Earth. In search of Eternal Joy we go round and round in the wheel, through hells, heavens, purgatories and multiple worlds.
We incarnate all over again, sometimes we repeat our lives and sometimes we assume completely new personalities and become entirely different individuals or even animals, demons, etc. We are searching for something, and that something can't be found in a single life-time on Earth. In search of Eternal Joy we go round and round in the wheel, through hells, heavens, purgatories and multiple worlds.
File: 1628978272339.png (235.73 KB, 456x533, 456:533, 44hl3o66m8oz.png) ImgOps iqdb
Does anyone else here think that it's possible to literally be too lazy to live?
I know this is an odd question, but it's something that has been on my mind. I've been thinking about my life, and it's clear to me that if I put in the work and fulfilled my responsibilities, you know, if I did what is expected of me, then I'd probably be slightly less miserable. Also, if I went even further and did more than it's expected of me, and became more accomplished in every regard, more successful in my career, looks, hobbies, relationships, everything, then yeah, maybe I could achieve bliss, if that's even possible, to "be" happy…
However, even with this knowledge, I just don't do anything, I spend all of my time procrastinating and doing the bare minimum, less than the bare minimum actually, no matter what I do it just feels like a chore, my responsibilities just made me feel terrible and I can't do anything right, but if I don't do anything then I'm alone with my thoughts and that's terrible in it's own way, so I just try to keep myself distracted and entertained with things that might make me happy at pretty much all times, but that's also terrible because anyone looking from the outside in will just see an irresponsible manchild, which is just humiliating…
I'm gonna drop out of college pretty soon, and will either become a NEET, or my parents force me to work for them or seek help for my mental health, the only other alternative is to study all of the time so that I can graduate, and then spend the rest of my life working all of the time, but not only do I feel like I have no energy for that, I legitimately don't want to do any of this anymore.
I don't do anything all day, so I know this sounds pathetic and senseless… but I'm tired of everything, perhaps I could turn things around if I just tried harder, but I don't want to, I don't see any point in doing anything, and I just don't have it in me anymore.
I know this is an odd question, but it's something that has been on my mind. I've been thinking about my life, and it's clear to me that if I put in the work and fulfilled my responsibilities, you know, if I did what is expected of me, then I'd probably be slightly less miserable. Also, if I went even further and did more than it's expected of me, and became more accomplished in every regard, more successful in my career, looks, hobbies, relationships, everything, then yeah, maybe I could achieve bliss, if that's even possible, to "be" happy…
However, even with this knowledge, I just don't do anything, I spend all of my time procrastinating and doing the bare minimum, less than the bare minimum actually, no matter what I do it just feels like a chore, my responsibilities just made me feel terrible and I can't do anything right, but if I don't do anything then I'm alone with my thoughts and that's terrible in it's own way, so I just try to keep myself distracted and entertained with things that might make me happy at pretty much all times, but that's also terrible because anyone looking from the outside in will just see an irresponsible manchild, which is just humiliating…
I'm gonna drop out of college pretty soon, and will either become a NEET, or my parents force me to work for them or seek help for my mental health, the only other alternative is to study all of the time so that I can graduate, and then spend the rest of my life working all of the time, but not only do I feel like I have no energy for that, I legitimately don't want to do any of this anymore.
I don't do anything all day, so I know this sounds pathetic and senseless… but I'm tired of everything, perhaps I could turn things around if I just tried harder, but I don't want to, I don't see any point in doing anything, and I just don't have it in me anymore.
>>245526
I think most people are just more gratified by accomplishing things and progressing in the real world. I've been held back by extreme laziness since middle school and I've thought for a long time that it's because I barely feel anything after getting something done. Your actions are driven by your emotions and if you're depressed and blunted, your actions will reflect a lack of passion.
I think most people are just more gratified by accomplishing things and progressing in the real world. I've been held back by extreme laziness since middle school and I've thought for a long time that it's because I barely feel anything after getting something done. Your actions are driven by your emotions and if you're depressed and blunted, your actions will reflect a lack of passion.
File: 1628983252953.jpg (172.18 KB, 520x615, 104:123, 1613776093863.jpg) ImgOps iqdb
>>245529
I see what you've mentioned in the people around me all of the time, always pilling up more and more things to do, more responsibilities and chores, so they can have more accomplishments on their evergrowing resume, and progress in their lives.
I don't get it though, I've never had this drive for doing these things like others do, but I guess it's just like you've said, our actions are driven by our emotions, it comes down to lack of passion, if we don't feel passion for anything then we're doomed, somewhat.
Honestly I just think adult life is too hard and boring to be worth it, I'm not gonna pretend that I don't get some dopamine from time to time, a high, but the highs of success don't compare to the chore of the journey and the misery of dissapointment.
What we know as happiness is so brief and weak… Like you've said, you barely feel anything after getting something done, and I totally get that. It just takes so much effort, and will mostly come from us putting ourselves in situations which can end well or not, and the misery we'll feel when failing is always stronger and more everlasting than the joy of success.
However, if we do manage to acheive success, what's next? Well, we enjoy our very brief high, and then we go onto the next thing we have to do, which will make us suffer through either misery or boredom, or both, so that we have a chance of getting the next very brief high, then we repeat this forever.
I see what you've mentioned in the people around me all of the time, always pilling up more and more things to do, more responsibilities and chores, so they can have more accomplishments on their evergrowing resume, and progress in their lives.
I don't get it though, I've never had this drive for doing these things like others do, but I guess it's just like you've said, our actions are driven by our emotions, it comes down to lack of passion, if we don't feel passion for anything then we're doomed, somewhat.
Honestly I just think adult life is too hard and boring to be worth it, I'm not gonna pretend that I don't get some dopamine from time to time, a high, but the highs of success don't compare to the chore of the journey and the misery of dissapointment.
What we know as happiness is so brief and weak… Like you've said, you barely feel anything after getting something done, and I totally get that. It just takes so much effort, and will mostly come from us putting ourselves in situations which can end well or not, and the misery we'll feel when failing is always stronger and more everlasting than the joy of success.
However, if we do manage to acheive success, what's next? Well, we enjoy our very brief high, and then we go onto the next thing we have to do, which will make us suffer through either misery or boredom, or both, so that we have a chance of getting the next very brief high, then we repeat this forever.
>>245530
>>245529
>>245526
Have you ever considered that it's not laziness which is holding you back but the fact that everything you do that is even remotely social related (including simple things like grocery shopping, getting a hair cut, walking outside in daylight) is multiple times more exhausting than for neurotypicals? No wonder we don't get done anything because everything tires us which other people thrive in.
>>245529
>>245526
Have you ever considered that it's not laziness which is holding you back but the fact that everything you do that is even remotely social related (including simple things like grocery shopping, getting a hair cut, walking outside in daylight) is multiple times more exhausting than for neurotypicals? No wonder we don't get done anything because everything tires us which other people thrive in.
File: 1628998990529.png (72.38 KB, 256x256, 1:1, 1614441948898.png) ImgOps iqdb
>>245536
I'm not sure, while I do agree that the people around me seem way less anxious and have way more energy and drive to do things than me, I'd still consider myself neurotypical too.
When I was younger I had so much more drive to do both my hobbies and my obligations, things were more satisfying to do and I'd usually excel in at least some of the things I did, especially school, now I can't do anything right and will probably drop out of college soon, a complete 180º in just a few years.
I have no motivation or energy to do anything and spend most of my time in bed trying to distract myself somehow, and even though I do almost nothing productive all day I still feel tired all of the time, and frequently have total breakdowns over anything that goes wrong.
What I'm trying to get at is that, well, while now I'm completely broken, I wasn't always like this, is it possible for someone neurotypical to stop being neurotypical with time?
I'll admit that I'm not too familiar with the term, as far as I recall it's mostly used to describe people outside of the autism spectrum, and while I have some suspicions about me being in the spectrum, I've never gone out of my way to confirm it, and I'm not sure if those difficulties would manifest now that I'm an adult even though they didn't when I was young.
Either way, I appreciate your reply, this is a possibility that I've never seriously considered before, and while it's not guaranteed that it'll be the answer, it's definitely something I might have to look into, I'm grateful for your insight.
I'm not sure, while I do agree that the people around me seem way less anxious and have way more energy and drive to do things than me, I'd still consider myself neurotypical too.
When I was younger I had so much more drive to do both my hobbies and my obligations, things were more satisfying to do and I'd usually excel in at least some of the things I did, especially school, now I can't do anything right and will probably drop out of college soon, a complete 180º in just a few years.
I have no motivation or energy to do anything and spend most of my time in bed trying to distract myself somehow, and even though I do almost nothing productive all day I still feel tired all of the time, and frequently have total breakdowns over anything that goes wrong.
What I'm trying to get at is that, well, while now I'm completely broken, I wasn't always like this, is it possible for someone neurotypical to stop being neurotypical with time?
I'll admit that I'm not too familiar with the term, as far as I recall it's mostly used to describe people outside of the autism spectrum, and while I have some suspicions about me being in the spectrum, I've never gone out of my way to confirm it, and I'm not sure if those difficulties would manifest now that I'm an adult even though they didn't when I was young.
Either way, I appreciate your reply, this is a possibility that I've never seriously considered before, and while it's not guaranteed that it'll be the answer, it's definitely something I might have to look into, I'm grateful for your insight.
My nerves has been firing continuously for two days now at the mere fact that my sister has her friend staying over. I am too aroused. People talking makes me anxious. People making noise louder than a whisper makes me anxious. People existing that is not my family in my home makes me anxious. I was doing well a few days ago by finally starting to learn a new skill but this creature in my home talking and laughing below me I can't do anything. My nerves are just involuntarily on fire. I can't do shit. If they force me to go down there and provoke me I'll probably snap.
File: 1629017338150.jpg (46.57 KB, 482x347, 482:347, 1628875473513.jpg) ImgOps iqdb
>>245538
I just wanna hug you bro, don't care about the wizzie shit, I just need a hug and be told everything okay. I'm so tired of this shit.
I just wanna hug you bro, don't care about the wizzie shit, I just need a hug and be told everything okay. I'm so tired of this shit.
>>245530
>>245538
>I have no motivation or energy to do anything and spend most of my time in bed trying to distract myself somehow, and even though I do almost nothing productive all day I still feel tired all of the time, and frequently have total breakdowns over anything that goes wrong.
Oh hey it's me. Hello me
>>245538
>I have no motivation or energy to do anything and spend most of my time in bed trying to distract myself somehow, and even though I do almost nothing productive all day I still feel tired all of the time, and frequently have total breakdowns over anything that goes wrong.
Oh hey it's me. Hello me
>>245542
I can't take it anymore. Everything is agitating. Noises are agitating. Smells are agitating. The temperature is agitating. Me being agitated is agitating. I am too fucked up in the head to live. I swore off wageslaving because the environment outside is too agitating but if I can't even find peace in my own home then where else could I escape to? No other way this could end without me hanging from my window frame.
I can't take it anymore. Everything is agitating. Noises are agitating. Smells are agitating. The temperature is agitating. Me being agitated is agitating. I am too fucked up in the head to live. I swore off wageslaving because the environment outside is too agitating but if I can't even find peace in my own home then where else could I escape to? No other way this could end without me hanging from my window frame.
File: 1629033110898.jpg (463.65 KB, 2048x1559, 2048:1559, 1613072484258.jpg) ImgOps iqdb
>>245561
Why are you being triggered by something you can choose not to see? Press the hide file button.
Why are you being triggered by something you can choose not to see? Press the hide file button.
>>245561
Sorry, I didn't mean anything bad by posting them, I'm just used to it, always liked doing it for some reason, but either way I'm sorry it was triggering.
Sorry, I didn't mean anything bad by posting them, I'm just used to it, always liked doing it for some reason, but either way I'm sorry it was triggering.
File: 1629071143739.jpg (71.39 KB, 283x283, 1:1, cyber-touhou-patchouli.jpg) ImgOps iqdb
>>245561
Are…are you new to imageboards?
Are…are you new to imageboards?
>>245566
You shouldn't have to apologize to those kinds of people anon
I'm really getting sick of the anti-anime crowd invading spaces where animeposting always been a thing. Usually it's just a thinly veiled excuse to be hate on Japan
You shouldn't have to apologize to those kinds of people anon
I'm really getting sick of the anti-anime crowd invading spaces where animeposting always been a thing. Usually it's just a thinly veiled excuse to be hate on Japan
>>245585
It should be obvious that if you post something, someone will not like it. Why get angry at them if you accept this when you put your post out there?
It should be obvious that if you post something, someone will not like it. Why get angry at them if you accept this when you put your post out there?
>>245593
He can get angry and post against him if he wants, just because someone post something I don't like, doesn't mean I can't say a single word to him or express my opinion.
He can get angry and post against him if he wants, just because someone post something I don't like, doesn't mean I can't say a single word to him or express my opinion.
Since 2017 I've tried 20+ different supplements/drugs/medications in the attempt of finding something that makes life worth living. Surprise surprise none of them helped.
File: 1629137195833.jpg (62.41 KB, 600x1004, 150:251, 1586120643618.jpg) ImgOps iqdb
>>245602
I think this is what scares me the most about the very idea of recovery, all that people talk about are the cases in which someone started taking medication and/or going to therapy and suddently they felt better, but if you complain about that not being the case for you, most respond by saying that for some people it takes more time, different medication, different therapist, etc.
We're miserable, and a lot of us are already on the stage where we're planning how we're gonna quit all of this, and we're expected to put up with existence for years longer than we planned to, only for the very small chance of a medication and/or therapy miraculously working and making us feel somewhat happy, or at least less miserable.
It seems like a painful effort, the certainty of misery, for the sake of having a low chance of reward, that even if it does come, could take years, or worse, may never come at all.
I took medication in 2018, and did therapy in 2018 and 2019, and never felt any better, I've never gotten out of a therapy session feeling better than when I came in, and the medication felt like I was taking nothing, usually people say that I should've hung around with my psychiatrist longer to try different medication, but honestly, it just doesn't feel worth it anymore.
I'm sorry that you're on the same boat, I felt hopeless about my medication doing nothing even though I took it for less than a year, trying to get better since 2017 and always being let down by that which is supposed to make you feel better must be very painful, a feeling of helplessness, I can't imagine how you must feel right now.
I think this is what scares me the most about the very idea of recovery, all that people talk about are the cases in which someone started taking medication and/or going to therapy and suddently they felt better, but if you complain about that not being the case for you, most respond by saying that for some people it takes more time, different medication, different therapist, etc.
We're miserable, and a lot of us are already on the stage where we're planning how we're gonna quit all of this, and we're expected to put up with existence for years longer than we planned to, only for the very small chance of a medication and/or therapy miraculously working and making us feel somewhat happy, or at least less miserable.
It seems like a painful effort, the certainty of misery, for the sake of having a low chance of reward, that even if it does come, could take years, or worse, may never come at all.
I took medication in 2018, and did therapy in 2018 and 2019, and never felt any better, I've never gotten out of a therapy session feeling better than when I came in, and the medication felt like I was taking nothing, usually people say that I should've hung around with my psychiatrist longer to try different medication, but honestly, it just doesn't feel worth it anymore.
I'm sorry that you're on the same boat, I felt hopeless about my medication doing nothing even though I took it for less than a year, trying to get better since 2017 and always being let down by that which is supposed to make you feel better must be very painful, a feeling of helplessness, I can't imagine how you must feel right now.
>>245623
I'm actually going to my therapist in a week to try another medication. Don't know why. I should cancel now but I don't know what to do. There has to be some event in my future to look forward to or I just get swallowed up by the days.
It's bad anon. For us, we're so messed up and nobody does drug trials on people this messed up.
I'm actually going to my therapist in a week to try another medication. Don't know why. I should cancel now but I don't know what to do. There has to be some event in my future to look forward to or I just get swallowed up by the days.
It's bad anon. For us, we're so messed up and nobody does drug trials on people this messed up.
>>245623
well it is true it takes a long time to find the right medication and exactly what is wrong with you, it took me 7 years to get properly treated for bipolar disorder
well it is true it takes a long time to find the right medication and exactly what is wrong with you, it took me 7 years to get properly treated for bipolar disorder
>>245526
>>245530
>>245538
Don't worry, if you are normal enough for college then you are just what people call a late-bloomer, I guess. (English isn't my main language.) You are going through a bad period in your life, in a couple of years you will fully norm it up and will laugh at the fact you posted on imageboards for male virgins with your friends, gf and children.
How can some of you here function so well as to have jobs or enroll in higher education? Can't comprehend this, I would go crazy and end up killing someone in these cases. If you can still function "normally" after high school then you will be a normal sooner or later, in my opinion.
>>245602
>>245623
>>245624
>>245625
>therapy
>drugs
>meme personality disorders
When did this site turn into another /r9k/?
>>245530
>>245538
Don't worry, if you are normal enough for college then you are just what people call a late-bloomer, I guess. (English isn't my main language.) You are going through a bad period in your life, in a couple of years you will fully norm it up and will laugh at the fact you posted on imageboards for male virgins with your friends, gf and children.
How can some of you here function so well as to have jobs or enroll in higher education? Can't comprehend this, I would go crazy and end up killing someone in these cases. If you can still function "normally" after high school then you will be a normal sooner or later, in my opinion.
>>245602
>>245623
>>245624
>>245625
>therapy
>drugs
>meme personality disorders
When did this site turn into another /r9k/?
File: 1629140467298.jpg (27.82 KB, 503x691, 503:691, 1623392997115.jpg) ImgOps iqdb
>>245624
Well, if this meeting with your therapist next week is already planned, I'd go through with it, perhaps this medication is the one, or not, but you're so close to the appointment I'd say you might aswell go with it at this point. I really hope this time things do work out, anon, you've clearly already been through a lot, hopefully this is the turning point you've been waiting for.
>>245625
>>245626
I've given up too really, I'm glad things worked out for you, and I know that sometimes it does take a long time, but that's my problem, I can't stand the idea of potentially waiting for years to stop being miserable, I just don't know for how long I can put up with life.
>>245627
I don't see that happening, it might look like I'm functioning well, but I break down pretty much every day, and unless I'm distracting myself I can't think of anything other than death, I've only made it so far because we've had online exams for almost 2 years, which made cheating easy, I didn't really learn anything and now exams aren't online anymore and there are still over 2 years to go, it's gonna catch up to me sooner or later and I'll dropout, I managed to enroll in higher education because I was mentally healthy as a teenager, but my adulthood has been nothing but misery and it's been like this for over 4 years, I don't recall what it's like to not be literally suicidal anymore.
I don't think I'm a late-bloomer, at this point I'm 100% sure that I'll never bloom at all. About the /r9k/ comment, to be fair I do browse that place too, though recently I feel like it's not the same as it used to be, I just don't like it as much anymore, don't feel as welcome.
Well, if this meeting with your therapist next week is already planned, I'd go through with it, perhaps this medication is the one, or not, but you're so close to the appointment I'd say you might aswell go with it at this point. I really hope this time things do work out, anon, you've clearly already been through a lot, hopefully this is the turning point you've been waiting for.
>>245625
>>245626
I've given up too really, I'm glad things worked out for you, and I know that sometimes it does take a long time, but that's my problem, I can't stand the idea of potentially waiting for years to stop being miserable, I just don't know for how long I can put up with life.
>>245627
I don't see that happening, it might look like I'm functioning well, but I break down pretty much every day, and unless I'm distracting myself I can't think of anything other than death, I've only made it so far because we've had online exams for almost 2 years, which made cheating easy, I didn't really learn anything and now exams aren't online anymore and there are still over 2 years to go, it's gonna catch up to me sooner or later and I'll dropout, I managed to enroll in higher education because I was mentally healthy as a teenager, but my adulthood has been nothing but misery and it's been like this for over 4 years, I don't recall what it's like to not be literally suicidal anymore.
I don't think I'm a late-bloomer, at this point I'm 100% sure that I'll never bloom at all. About the /r9k/ comment, to be fair I do browse that place too, though recently I feel like it's not the same as it used to be, I just don't like it as much anymore, don't feel as welcome.
File: 1629141086047.jpg (24.64 KB, 500x384, 125:96, 1613268623539.jpg) ImgOps iqdb
>>245632
Oh, sorry, that part was about being glad that things worked out was regarding the anon who managed to treat his bipolar disorder after 7 years, I tagged you there too since you've replied to him mentioning that you've given up, since I'm on the same boat as you there.
I apologize, looking at it now I can see that replying to both at the same time could be a bit confusing, hopefully I managed to clear it up, anon.
Oh, sorry, that part was about being glad that things worked out was regarding the anon who managed to treat his bipolar disorder after 7 years, I tagged you there too since you've replied to him mentioning that you've given up, since I'm on the same boat as you there.
I apologize, looking at it now I can see that replying to both at the same time could be a bit confusing, hopefully I managed to clear it up, anon.
>>245631
I don't think I would be able to go through uni/college even in online mode. You still have to do stuff I guess, like writing homework, projects or whatever, no? I would be too lazy and not-caring to bother with pleasing some asshole normalfag professor. Knowing myself I would end up shouting at my professor or teacher and call him a worm, a faggot or a whore.
But maybe it is just me who is so dysfunctional even compared to the average of this site.
I don't think I would be able to go through uni/college even in online mode. You still have to do stuff I guess, like writing homework, projects or whatever, no? I would be too lazy and not-caring to bother with pleasing some asshole normalfag professor. Knowing myself I would end up shouting at my professor or teacher and call him a worm, a faggot or a whore.
But maybe it is just me who is so dysfunctional even compared to the average of this site.
File: 1629141491159.jpg (55.74 KB, 600x662, 300:331, 1442411132118.jpg) ImgOps iqdb
after years of neeting to 'relax' all my old stress and intense feelings of wanting to die came back after the first day of starting work today.
it just never gets any better does it?
I really thought I would somehow hold up better but if anything it seems to hit harder than I remember
it just never gets any better does it?
I really thought I would somehow hold up better but if anything it seems to hit harder than I remember
File: 1629141954087.png (792.06 KB, 720x1280, 9:16, 1607954049077.png) ImgOps iqdb
>>245637
That's ok, I'm glad we managed to clear things up, anon.
>>245635
I do have some homework and projects, but they're really the only thing college related I put any effort in, all of my effort in this case, it's a pain, but I know that if I do it well it's pretty much a few free points that could literally save me down the line, also they're usually in groups so that helps me out too.
My teachers make me upset too, always doing things in the most complicated way and filling us up with things to do for only a few points, as if their subject is the only one we have, and there are times in class in which I feel like I'm gonna snap, where I just want to run away from class, but I don't see myself ever confronting any teacher about it, I'm too much of a coward and care too much about other people's approval to do anything, so I just put up with it all.
That's ok, I'm glad we managed to clear things up, anon.
>>245635
I do have some homework and projects, but they're really the only thing college related I put any effort in, all of my effort in this case, it's a pain, but I know that if I do it well it's pretty much a few free points that could literally save me down the line, also they're usually in groups so that helps me out too.
My teachers make me upset too, always doing things in the most complicated way and filling us up with things to do for only a few points, as if their subject is the only one we have, and there are times in class in which I feel like I'm gonna snap, where I just want to run away from class, but I don't see myself ever confronting any teacher about it, I'm too much of a coward and care too much about other people's approval to do anything, so I just put up with it all.
>>245640
>I'm too much of a coward and care too much about other people's approval to do anything, so I just put up with it all.
That is a straight pathway to my state, actually. By never speaking up, never saying what is on your mind, always "controlling" yourself you will end up snapping one day. You will just not care anymore and you will do or say what you want, it is a great feeling to tell the truth. I was kind of like you too, then one day I tried what it is like to be myself, unironically. My grandmother was bothering me, saying my english teacher called and said I should go to school for something, I said to my grandma no. She bothered me and I lifted this big mirror that got into my hands and threw it at the floor while screaming. I was surprised and scared of myself a little but it felt good to make my stand against others.
Another example, at high school the same teacher told me she wanted to speak with my mother and asked me when can she meet her? Told her I don't know because she actually works for a living, not just fooles around like teachers do. Later heard she actually cried, made me feel very satisfied. Another example at high school, I told another teacher and my group mates that I would like to slash their throats. Another example with my family, my father forced me to help in some work around the house. It was exhausting physical work I wasn't used to, I endured this bullshit for days and all the bitching of the guy who was paid to do his job, a friend of my father. He only had to do specific works, he was a mason while I had to do all the shit work with my father. This guy constantly bitched about how I worked, I ended up screaming at my dad so that this guy heard it too, in a violent tone while throwing the shovel to ground to get another fucker for this shit job because I'm out. These are little things but I still feel proud of myself whenever I recall them. Standing up for yourself is one of the greatest things in life.
If you raise your voice and even just pretend to be angry then people will be incredibly friendly to you. Well, most people at least. They are cowards. But witty, passive-aggressive talking back is nice too and can be way more destructive than shouting. I never let normals push me around anymore, if I can get away with it.
Also, you should quit avatarfagging. It doesn't bother me but there are some literal autists here who report everything to mods they don't like.
>I'm too much of a coward and care too much about other people's approval to do anything, so I just put up with it all.
That is a straight pathway to my state, actually. By never speaking up, never saying what is on your mind, always "controlling" yourself you will end up snapping one day. You will just not care anymore and you will do or say what you want, it is a great feeling to tell the truth. I was kind of like you too, then one day I tried what it is like to be myself, unironically. My grandmother was bothering me, saying my english teacher called and said I should go to school for something, I said to my grandma no. She bothered me and I lifted this big mirror that got into my hands and threw it at the floor while screaming. I was surprised and scared of myself a little but it felt good to make my stand against others.
Another example, at high school the same teacher told me she wanted to speak with my mother and asked me when can she meet her? Told her I don't know because she actually works for a living, not just fooles around like teachers do. Later heard she actually cried, made me feel very satisfied. Another example at high school, I told another teacher and my group mates that I would like to slash their throats. Another example with my family, my father forced me to help in some work around the house. It was exhausting physical work I wasn't used to, I endured this bullshit for days and all the bitching of the guy who was paid to do his job, a friend of my father. He only had to do specific works, he was a mason while I had to do all the shit work with my father. This guy constantly bitched about how I worked, I ended up screaming at my dad so that this guy heard it too, in a violent tone while throwing the shovel to ground to get another fucker for this shit job because I'm out. These are little things but I still feel proud of myself whenever I recall them. Standing up for yourself is one of the greatest things in life.
If you raise your voice and even just pretend to be angry then people will be incredibly friendly to you. Well, most people at least. They are cowards. But witty, passive-aggressive talking back is nice too and can be way more destructive than shouting. I never let normals push me around anymore, if I can get away with it.
Also, you should quit avatarfagging. It doesn't bother me but there are some literal autists here who report everything to mods they don't like.
File: 1629144914074.png (921.65 KB, 800x1200, 2:3, 1617996575606.png) ImgOps iqdb
>>245643
I don't see myself ever snapping and changing like that to be honest, I don't think I have a whole lot of time left anyway, so I'll probably be gone before that ever has a chance to happen.
To be fair, there are a few instances in which I do snap a bit, raise my tone, etc, mostly with my family, since at home I don't have to worry about keeping an image to be loved, in theory my parents have the obligation to love me by default, since the only reason I'm carrying the burden of life is because they wanted me to, also my sister begged for a little brother and after they gave her one she thought it would be ok to treat me like garbage my whole life, so I don't mind raising my tone towards her either sometimes.
The problem is that everytime I snap, even if it wasn't that big of a deal, even if I was in the right, I feel guilty, miserable about it, and hate myself for it, I can't stand making others unhappy in any way, I'm a people pleaser with no self esteem, but I can't help it, I don't know if it's a matter of legitimate guilt or a desire to be loved and approved, perhaps a mix of both.
About the avatarfagging, I guess it could lead to me getting reported, so I appreciate your warning, but I don't mind it much, I like doing it, so if it does lead to me getting reported, then so be it, I probably won't hang around for much longer if everything goes according to plan anyways.
I don't see myself ever snapping and changing like that to be honest, I don't think I have a whole lot of time left anyway, so I'll probably be gone before that ever has a chance to happen.
To be fair, there are a few instances in which I do snap a bit, raise my tone, etc, mostly with my family, since at home I don't have to worry about keeping an image to be loved, in theory my parents have the obligation to love me by default, since the only reason I'm carrying the burden of life is because they wanted me to, also my sister begged for a little brother and after they gave her one she thought it would be ok to treat me like garbage my whole life, so I don't mind raising my tone towards her either sometimes.
The problem is that everytime I snap, even if it wasn't that big of a deal, even if I was in the right, I feel guilty, miserable about it, and hate myself for it, I can't stand making others unhappy in any way, I'm a people pleaser with no self esteem, but I can't help it, I don't know if it's a matter of legitimate guilt or a desire to be loved and approved, perhaps a mix of both.
About the avatarfagging, I guess it could lead to me getting reported, so I appreciate your warning, but I don't mind it much, I like doing it, so if it does lead to me getting reported, then so be it, I probably won't hang around for much longer if everything goes according to plan anyways.
File: 1629151170893.jpg (77.08 KB, 1280x720, 16:9, download (4).jpg) ImgOps iqdb
>>245653
life sucks man, only thing I literally enjoy is fapping and thats because of my biological impulses that I can't help, it only happens once a week though. Nothing gives me joy, I don't really have a purpose anymore. Used to have normie purposes but in t he end just seems like so much work and not much of a good reward anyways. Do we just literally rot until we die, this is fucking life?
life sucks man, only thing I literally enjoy is fapping and thats because of my biological impulses that I can't help, it only happens once a week though. Nothing gives me joy, I don't really have a purpose anymore. Used to have normie purposes but in t he end just seems like so much work and not much of a good reward anyways. Do we just literally rot until we die, this is fucking life?
>>245655
…Once a week? You know low testosterone causes low drive as well, right? That's why succubi are passive, depressed lumps. I have to jack off at least twice a day and I'm 30…if you want some passion, well, the option is on the table. Most things are accomplished by men driven by their hormones, the sexual drive being sublimated into the dedication needed to achieve in art, science, etc.
…Once a week? You know low testosterone causes low drive as well, right? That's why succubi are passive, depressed lumps. I have to jack off at least twice a day and I'm 30…if you want some passion, well, the option is on the table. Most things are accomplished by men driven by their hormones, the sexual drive being sublimated into the dedication needed to achieve in art, science, etc.
>>245656
Fine it isn't once a week, mostly every other day. I just don't sound wizardly fucking fapping like a animal to succubi when we don't even have sex at all. Whatever I don't care anymore, fapping is the only joy I have in this shit faced world.
Fine it isn't once a week, mostly every other day. I just don't sound wizardly fucking fapping like a animal to succubi when we don't even have sex at all. Whatever I don't care anymore, fapping is the only joy I have in this shit faced world.
>>245656
that’s just pseudoscience, testosterone has nothing to do with ‘drive’, you’re actually buying garbage spouted in adverts for old men about supposed low T
that’s just pseudoscience, testosterone has nothing to do with ‘drive’, you’re actually buying garbage spouted in adverts for old men about supposed low T
File: 1629300486823.png (3.95 KB, 1053x36, 117:4, 12.png) ImgOps iqdb
Parents screaming at each other and slamming things around again. I don’t know how they get into such large fights over small things, but it’s clear they have no consideration for me or the effects that their behavior has. It’s sad to see two adults who can’t control their behavior and just get worse and worse.
All I wanted to say is there are a bunch of faggots on Sanctioned Suicide but I can't post it there because I'll get banned
File: 1629499538943.jpg (162.75 KB, 676x616, 169:154, 1531284858828.jpg) ImgOps iqdb
>go out in public
>get nervous
>start to sweat
>worry about how sweaty you are
>sweat even more
this happens literally every time to me
>get nervous
>start to sweat
>worry about how sweaty you are
>sweat even more
this happens literally every time to me
>>245643
Good, i made a teacher cry too. In high school i wrote "fuck you" to the teacher and she started crying.
Good, i made a teacher cry too. In high school i wrote "fuck you" to the teacher and she started crying.
>>245891
i go for long walks and sweat a lot when it's hot outside, i've stopped caring a long time ago lol, when i'm wearing a dark shirt there are all these salt stains all over the back, i used to be embarassed thinking of how gross it must have looked to people but now i find it strangely satisfying
anyway we all sweat, that's how it is.
i go for long walks and sweat a lot when it's hot outside, i've stopped caring a long time ago lol, when i'm wearing a dark shirt there are all these salt stains all over the back, i used to be embarassed thinking of how gross it must have looked to people but now i find it strangely satisfying
anyway we all sweat, that's how it is.
>>245901
I walk straight out the door first thing in the morning and walk for 50 minutes. Don't shower. Often don't even comb my hair. When I see another human being, I cross over to the other side of the street entirely or walk a different direction before they get halfway close enough to see observe my unwashed condition.
I walk straight out the door first thing in the morning and walk for 50 minutes. Don't shower. Often don't even comb my hair. When I see another human being, I cross over to the other side of the street entirely or walk a different direction before they get halfway close enough to see observe my unwashed condition.
Extreme escapism. It wasn't until the last 2 months that I knew what the term escapism actually meant. Now I'm feeling entirely trapped, my back to the pit, infernal fire lurking inside it, wind blowing me further back, already down on my knees, and all that's left is desperately staring at cute anime succubi on a screen until I die. I've accepted my fate. Time is unstoppable and I'll either end up dead, institutionalized or on the streets which will also kill me because I'm incapable of caring for myself. I don't care really.
I forgot to take my medication again, the sudden realization snaps me back from my screen in almost a shock every time
>>245868
I've read this sort of comment around here a couple of times, and it saddens me deeply, has anyone here even browsed /r9k/ recently? The threads that get the most attention and replies are the ones made by "Fembots", or ones that are about "Fembots". In the past these threads would've been mocked and treated as men LARP, which we all know is the case, but now it's taken seriously, and they even have orbiters.
If it's not one of these threads that is getting attention, it's one where someone is talking about their GF or BF, which again, would usually receive comments about how they don't belong there because they're clearly normies, but now it's taking over. The last common type of thread that has taken over is the one about submissive anons wanting to transition or wanting a mommy GF.
Everytime one of these threads is made it gets attention, it kills a regular /r9k/ thread made by depressed and lonely anons like us, that place is worse than ever now, so please, if you see an anon here who is clearly depressed and miserable like all of us, try to have empathy, everyone, and never tell them to go to /r9k/ because there's nothing left there for any of us.
I've read this sort of comment around here a couple of times, and it saddens me deeply, has anyone here even browsed /r9k/ recently? The threads that get the most attention and replies are the ones made by "Fembots", or ones that are about "Fembots". In the past these threads would've been mocked and treated as men LARP, which we all know is the case, but now it's taken seriously, and they even have orbiters.
If it's not one of these threads that is getting attention, it's one where someone is talking about their GF or BF, which again, would usually receive comments about how they don't belong there because they're clearly normies, but now it's taking over. The last common type of thread that has taken over is the one about submissive anons wanting to transition or wanting a mommy GF.
Everytime one of these threads is made it gets attention, it kills a regular /r9k/ thread made by depressed and lonely anons like us, that place is worse than ever now, so please, if you see an anon here who is clearly depressed and miserable like all of us, try to have empathy, everyone, and never tell them to go to /r9k/ because there's nothing left there for any of us.
>>245928
Yeah, and it means that r9kfags who made that place shit in the first place shouldn't feel welcomed here.
Yeah, and it means that r9kfags who made that place shit in the first place shouldn't feel welcomed here.
>>245928
Ive never browsed r9k before I always assumed it was for crabs, I only heard about this place in 2013 on 4chan/g/ and haven't used any other website since, so I'm pretty unaware of how the rest of the internet is
Ive never browsed r9k before I always assumed it was for crabs, I only heard about this place in 2013 on 4chan/g/ and haven't used any other website since, so I'm pretty unaware of how the rest of the internet is
>>245937
Before the normalfag invasion of halfchan, the board was actually pretty solid. Fullchan's was great too and more like here.
Before the normalfag invasion of halfchan, the board was actually pretty solid. Fullchan's was great too and more like here.
File: 1629780597123.jpg (296.15 KB, 1024x1143, 1024:1143, download (2).jpg) ImgOps iqdb
>>243924
All I feel is pure emptiness, I know I have depression but I never seen it this bad, I literally don't like anything or care for anything. Fapping is a chore aswell, I literally just eat and sleep, mindlessly watch idiotic videos all day and then wageslave. I don't even know why i'm alive at this point. Fuck man.
All I feel is pure emptiness, I know I have depression but I never seen it this bad, I literally don't like anything or care for anything. Fapping is a chore aswell, I literally just eat and sleep, mindlessly watch idiotic videos all day and then wageslave. I don't even know why i'm alive at this point. Fuck man.
>>243924
It's only a few months before I unlock full wizard status. I tried hard for the last 2 years because nothing gave me enjoyment when I was feeling dreadfully lonely. There is tranquility in accepting even the worst things. Some say EMDR therapy would help but I don't know.
It's only a few months before I unlock full wizard status. I tried hard for the last 2 years because nothing gave me enjoyment when I was feeling dreadfully lonely. There is tranquility in accepting even the worst things. Some say EMDR therapy would help but I don't know.
>>245854
I don't know about the country you live in, but in the USA, if you don't get a career you'll be stuck in a low wage, dead end job that will end up crippling you. These jobs go are minimum wage and have you standing all day for wages that can't support a single person for 40 hours, if you can get it with one employer. That being, they'll cut your hours short of 40 so you don't get benefits like healthcare, dental care, etc. Some people will get three jobs to take care of rent with barely any money left over to spend on luxuries. They have no time to get a better job, no money to move, and are in a state of constant pain from working on their feet all day. God forbid you get hurt and need medical attention. Oh, and of course if you get government assistance, which you'll need to survive, you'll be looked down upon.
>>245868
This image was saved from wizchan. You would have known that if you were a long time lurker. I haven't been to /r9k/ in a long time. Almost 8 years now, when I first found wizardchan.
I don't know about the country you live in, but in the USA, if you don't get a career you'll be stuck in a low wage, dead end job that will end up crippling you. These jobs go are minimum wage and have you standing all day for wages that can't support a single person for 40 hours, if you can get it with one employer. That being, they'll cut your hours short of 40 so you don't get benefits like healthcare, dental care, etc. Some people will get three jobs to take care of rent with barely any money left over to spend on luxuries. They have no time to get a better job, no money to move, and are in a state of constant pain from working on their feet all day. God forbid you get hurt and need medical attention. Oh, and of course if you get government assistance, which you'll need to survive, you'll be looked down upon.
>>245868
This image was saved from wizchan. You would have known that if you were a long time lurker. I haven't been to /r9k/ in a long time. Almost 8 years now, when I first found wizardchan.
Seems like everything I do is an affront to life. My actions are wrong, my attitude is bad, my motivations are vapid. No wonder my life sucks, but what am I meant to do? Reroll my personality?
File: 1629830167757.png (317.65 KB, 816x699, 272:233, 1625564390546.png) ImgOps iqdb
I need some advice, most specifically from anyone here on the board who lives a NEET lifestyle.
I'll probably dropout of college soon, due to my depression and suicidal thoughts making it impossible to properly function as an adult at all.
Either way, as a kid who they always had huge expectations on, I'll be their biggest dissapointment, who they'll resent for sure, maybe they'll kick me out, maybe they'll force me to work for them, maybe they'll force me to get psychiatric/psychological help.
All I want is for them to leave me alone, in my room, the only place that feels somewhat safe from everything, I just wanna stay in my room minding my own bussiness and living like a kid/teen forever, those were the only times things were bearable for me.
I'm not sure what will happen to me, I just know I'll probably feel miserable, so I need some advice to cope with it as well as possible, and to make it so things go my way:
1. How did/do you convince your parents to not kick you out?
2. How did/do you convince your parents to sustain you financially, for basic necessities and/or your hobbies and general lifestyle?
3. How did/do you convince your parents to not force you to work?
4. How did/do you convince your parents to not force you to get help?
5. How did/do you cope with being a dissapointment to your parents, family in general, and peers?
I'll probably dropout of college soon, due to my depression and suicidal thoughts making it impossible to properly function as an adult at all.
Either way, as a kid who they always had huge expectations on, I'll be their biggest dissapointment, who they'll resent for sure, maybe they'll kick me out, maybe they'll force me to work for them, maybe they'll force me to get psychiatric/psychological help.
All I want is for them to leave me alone, in my room, the only place that feels somewhat safe from everything, I just wanna stay in my room minding my own bussiness and living like a kid/teen forever, those were the only times things were bearable for me.
I'm not sure what will happen to me, I just know I'll probably feel miserable, so I need some advice to cope with it as well as possible, and to make it so things go my way:
1. How did/do you convince your parents to not kick you out?
2. How did/do you convince your parents to sustain you financially, for basic necessities and/or your hobbies and general lifestyle?
3. How did/do you convince your parents to not force you to work?
4. How did/do you convince your parents to not force you to get help?
5. How did/do you cope with being a dissapointment to your parents, family in general, and peers?
File: 1629830234437.gif (868.49 KB, 215x142, 215:142, 12726587268.gif) ImgOps iqdb
>>245959
>All I feel is pure emptiness, I know I have depression but I never seen it this bad, I literally don't like anything or care for anything.
>All I feel is pure emptiness, I know I have depression but I never seen it this bad, I literally don't like anything or care for anything.
>>245977
1. My parents love me too much to kick me out. I think they're also scared I would die on the street.
2.See #1. They don't fund my hobbies because I don't have any.
3. I just ignore them when they bring it up. It's worked so far. (Also I help out around the house a lot so it buffers the nagging)
4. My parents don't believe in mental health issues. All problems are the result of willpower and "Not trying hard enough"
5. Don't care. Just don't give a shit. I have no aspirations.
1. My parents love me too much to kick me out. I think they're also scared I would die on the street.
2.See #1. They don't fund my hobbies because I don't have any.
3. I just ignore them when they bring it up. It's worked so far. (Also I help out around the house a lot so it buffers the nagging)
4. My parents don't believe in mental health issues. All problems are the result of willpower and "Not trying hard enough"
5. Don't care. Just don't give a shit. I have no aspirations.
>>245977
1. I don't think they would ever kick me out, but I did go back to college and finish my degree to placate them for awhile
2. I have government benefits for bare necessities plus my hobbies are easily sustainable due to torrent sites. I also help them with shopping and other things
3. Once they realized how bad off I am and stopped lying to themselves I think they started to get it
4. I wanted to go because otherwise I wouldn't get gibs
5. I do not have to cope because I have no shame in it
1. I don't think they would ever kick me out, but I did go back to college and finish my degree to placate them for awhile
2. I have government benefits for bare necessities plus my hobbies are easily sustainable due to torrent sites. I also help them with shopping and other things
3. Once they realized how bad off I am and stopped lying to themselves I think they started to get it
4. I wanted to go because otherwise I wouldn't get gibs
5. I do not have to cope because I have no shame in it
The first time I laughed in months was to a documentary about run-down teenagers in my country. At first I thought that these people have a bad fate. Then the narration took a turn and it became clear that these teenagers basically are just failed normies, aggressive bullies, drug addicts, people with hopes and dreams, people that can be cured, late bloomers. It reminded me how far off and fucked I am as an almost wizard in my late twenties even compared to those people. And nobody will ever care about me, I have no history of official health care, I always suffered by myself. The only reaction left was laughing. Thanks for that I guess. What a joke life is.
File: 1629836690988.jpg (88.05 KB, 680x500, 34:25, 1594070255890.jpg) ImgOps iqdb
I apologize for whining but I'm just so fucking fed up. I'm diagnosed with schizophrenia alongside another condition, and I don't think I necessarily have the former, but it had all gone into the background except for occasional episodes mostly for the past 1-2 years, and I've been just getting my shit back together, but now it's raging up again. I've slept like shit the past week because hallucinations keep waking me up, demons taunting me, my brain thinking in alien patterns instead of words, getting caught up on nonsensical belief, etc. Last night all of a sudden out of nowhere it was like 500 voices started screaming over each other in a cacophony of madness and whenever I shut my eyes there was a dancing pattern mocking me. This went on for 10-20 minutes raging full force and then settled down to not quite so bad. I don't know what to do, there's no solution and if this keeps happening again it'll ruin everything for good. I've never found anyone else who experiences any of this shit like me and nobody gives a fuck (rightfully so) and there's just no solution.
>>245982
Jesus christ your life is bad. The more I live the more I am privy to the quiet horrors.
Jesus christ your life is bad. The more I live the more I am privy to the quiet horrors.
For a few weeks I've been debating whether to stop taking my bipolar medication or not, I've been on it for like 6 months and stopped getting mood swings but also I am pretty sure my hair is falling out more than usual.
First noticed a lotta hair in the shower drain, then a lot just in my bathroom, then just in general hair coming out often when I touched my head, then I started brushing my hair out regularly every day and I can brush it for like a minutes and get like 20~ hairs and I can repeat this every couple hours, one morning I brushed my hair out and I counted 40 hairs.
I don't know what to think, being bald/having extremely thin hair would really hurt my self esteem, I don't know if it's worth it. Oh yea also something I never experiences before, regularly having eyebrow and eyelash hairs falling on my face, kinda scary
First noticed a lotta hair in the shower drain, then a lot just in my bathroom, then just in general hair coming out often when I touched my head, then I started brushing my hair out regularly every day and I can brush it for like a minutes and get like 20~ hairs and I can repeat this every couple hours, one morning I brushed my hair out and I counted 40 hairs.
I don't know what to think, being bald/having extremely thin hair would really hurt my self esteem, I don't know if it's worth it. Oh yea also something I never experiences before, regularly having eyebrow and eyelash hairs falling on my face, kinda scary
>>245983
it could be worse. I feel extremely bad for schizos who have no fucking idea what's happening but that's not me, I'm cogent and aware (I think).
it could be worse. I feel extremely bad for schizos who have no fucking idea what's happening but that's not me, I'm cogent and aware (I think).
>>245986
Stop taking it and just learn how to ride out the highs better. I always liked the lows better but you might be different IDK. Better than going bald earlier than you should
Stop taking it and just learn how to ride out the highs better. I always liked the lows better but you might be different IDK. Better than going bald earlier than you should
>>245999
Bit of an understatement there. It can and will nuke your entire brain permanently. Post-SSRI syndrome is very real.
Something similar happened to me with wellbutrin with just 5 doses. Permanently.
Bit of an understatement there. It can and will nuke your entire brain permanently. Post-SSRI syndrome is very real.
Something similar happened to me with wellbutrin with just 5 doses. Permanently.
i’m severely mentally ill and people around can’t accept that. then again medical help ain’t so helpful anyways who cares. im mentally fuck.
>>246047
When you're mentally fucked you do the math and find out there's 0 point to doing anything.
Can't make enough money to move out. No point in working. No reason to go anywhere. Every day is the same thing, because nothing to do, no where to go and you can't make any decent cash because you're non-educated NEET with no employment history.
When you're mentally fucked you do the math and find out there's 0 point to doing anything.
Can't make enough money to move out. No point in working. No reason to go anywhere. Every day is the same thing, because nothing to do, no where to go and you can't make any decent cash because you're non-educated NEET with no employment history.
>>246006
What do you mean by "nuking my brain", exactly? Can you describe what exactly SSRIs caused on you?
I hear so many things about anti-depressants, and it makes me doubt if most people taking them are depressive at all or if the medication is that catastrophic or simply ineffective
What do you mean by "nuking my brain", exactly? Can you describe what exactly SSRIs caused on you?
I hear so many things about anti-depressants, and it makes me doubt if most people taking them are depressive at all or if the medication is that catastrophic or simply ineffective
None of this shit is enjoyable how do people cope with wageslaving and hobbies for 50+ years. I can't take another day of this bullshit.
I want to do a brain scan because there's something seriously wrong with me recently. I feel like I lose the ability to learn and develop dementia.
File: 1630088897999.pdf (6.93 MB, Mucusless Diet - Arnold Eh….pdf)
>>246156
Start the warp wanings.
-Leave grains and breads of any kind.
-Leave dairies and red meat.
-Leave industrial food.
-Practice colon cleansings often.
-Practice fasting and evelop your body into the ability to do it.
The later you are the deeper the damage.
Be strong.
Start the warp wanings.
-Leave grains and breads of any kind.
-Leave dairies and red meat.
-Leave industrial food.
-Practice colon cleansings often.
-Practice fasting and evelop your body into the ability to do it.
The later you are the deeper the damage.
Be strong.
File: 1630106828044.jpg (602.82 KB, 1046x3230, 523:1615, 1613681931826.jpg) ImgOps iqdb
I'm literally going to kill myself out of lazyness at this point, I'm not even kidding, I can see that if I just put the effort into my struggles I might be able to stay alive and have a relatively normal life, but I don't want to, I don't want to get better anymore, because that has lost all meaning to me.
A normal life is nothing but spending the majority of your time tired, stressed and miserable, begging for the weekend to come, so you can enjoy a few hours engaging in meaningless hobbies which give you some dopamine until you have to go to bed and repeat the whole cycle, I don't get the appeal.
I'm in college right now, spending hours and hours in classes, and it seems most of my colleagues spend the remaining free hours of everyday studying even more, so that they don't suffer when the exams come. It's all a matter of doing things we don't want to do, and therefore suffering, to avoid suffering.
I don't get it, I'd rather kill myself than spend another hour in class, studying, doing exams or driving to some place I don't want to go to, life is almost nothing but having to do things I don't want to do in order to stay alive, even if life consisted only of me staying in my room it'd still be bad, but it'd be tolerable.
That's not the case though, I'm forced to leave my safe place all of the time, none of this is worth it, life is too much work for too little pay, figuratively and literally. While my colleagues are all studying countless hours everyday in order to preparate for the exams, I'm planning my suicide, already very close to getting everything I need.
I'm literally too lazy to live, and I'll die because of it.
A normal life is nothing but spending the majority of your time tired, stressed and miserable, begging for the weekend to come, so you can enjoy a few hours engaging in meaningless hobbies which give you some dopamine until you have to go to bed and repeat the whole cycle, I don't get the appeal.
I'm in college right now, spending hours and hours in classes, and it seems most of my colleagues spend the remaining free hours of everyday studying even more, so that they don't suffer when the exams come. It's all a matter of doing things we don't want to do, and therefore suffering, to avoid suffering.
I don't get it, I'd rather kill myself than spend another hour in class, studying, doing exams or driving to some place I don't want to go to, life is almost nothing but having to do things I don't want to do in order to stay alive, even if life consisted only of me staying in my room it'd still be bad, but it'd be tolerable.
That's not the case though, I'm forced to leave my safe place all of the time, none of this is worth it, life is too much work for too little pay, figuratively and literally. While my colleagues are all studying countless hours everyday in order to preparate for the exams, I'm planning my suicide, already very close to getting everything I need.
I'm literally too lazy to live, and I'll die because of it.
>>246183
My motivation and energy got gradually devoured over the last years. I remember a time where I wanted to work, that was 10 years ago. Now I'm completely drained. I don't know how people can work to 60 and beyond. I'm not even 30 and haven't even worked really full time and feel like it's already over. It's all so tiresome. Life is too long.
My motivation and energy got gradually devoured over the last years. I remember a time where I wanted to work, that was 10 years ago. Now I'm completely drained. I don't know how people can work to 60 and beyond. I'm not even 30 and haven't even worked really full time and feel like it's already over. It's all so tiresome. Life is too long.
I'm getting ready to throw in the towel on the internet. I just don't make good posts anymore. Probably never did.
>>246183
Main reason why I dropped out of college, too much work and that's just only community college for me which won't get me anywhere. If I go to uni, I gotta do so much bullshit I don't want to just to get a job that will help me survive and have a regular fucking house. I don't wanna bother anymore and just try to learn a trade or be a wageslave for the rest of my life. Can't imagine spending most of my life studying and studying while still working a shit job to survive at the same time. That's no fucking life to live, fuck that, rather fucking be homeless and die, this shit isn't worth it man.
Main reason why I dropped out of college, too much work and that's just only community college for me which won't get me anywhere. If I go to uni, I gotta do so much bullshit I don't want to just to get a job that will help me survive and have a regular fucking house. I don't wanna bother anymore and just try to learn a trade or be a wageslave for the rest of my life. Can't imagine spending most of my life studying and studying while still working a shit job to survive at the same time. That's no fucking life to live, fuck that, rather fucking be homeless and die, this shit isn't worth it man.
File: 1630517565928.jpg (23.51 KB, 480x360, 4:3, fuck.jpg) ImgOps iqdb
Hornet fell out of a tree, burrowed into my hair and stung me on top of my head. I picked the blasted thing out of my hair and threw it onto the ground which stunned for a few seconds after which it pursued me for a short distance.
>>244769
I just recently did this too after 2 years. I decided to after I was at the dentist and the teeth cleaning ladies were whispering and giggling about my plaque. I wont let that happen again.
I just recently did this too after 2 years. I decided to after I was at the dentist and the teeth cleaning ladies were whispering and giggling about my plaque. I wont let that happen again.
[Last 50 Posts]