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So many people on Wizardchan had a happy childhood, and often compose posts wishing to go back to the "simpler times" when they weren't waging n slaving. Anywiz here that's never had a happy moment in their life? Cuz this thread's for you.
I was a weak loser that was bullied as child and now I’m still a weak loser.I hated my childhood and everything
>>256207
Not too poor but was low middle class and still is just did not afforded any luxuries. I envied other children with good computers and playstations though
Not too poor but was low middle class and still is just did not afforded any luxuries. I envied other children with good computers and playstations though
I was "raised" by an alcoholic single mother drug addict. On paper my childhood sucked but back then I didn't really have a frame of reference. I didn't understand why social services and what not were always talking to me. My life back then was basically "oh so that's how it is then" and I would accept whatever happened.
>>256208
some of us had super nintendo/n64 but we were emotionally starved from family/abused/neglected, bullied and shunned from school (not like we cared about school anyways).
we used vidya and old cartoons to cope with the lives we were given. a poorfag does have it worse but not that much unless you went starving.
some of us had super nintendo/n64 but we were emotionally starved from family/abused/neglected, bullied and shunned from school (not like we cared about school anyways).
we used vidya and old cartoons to cope with the lives we were given. a poorfag does have it worse but not that much unless you went starving.
I remember youth fondly but I know I pretty much stopped being happy as soon as I was put in school. Best years of my life were age 3-4 just playing in my backyard most days.
>>256209
Same here. I hate having more feminine traits despite the fact I never want to be like my mom and she was a terrible parent. Divorce courts need a massive overhaul. That said if you lose your father idk what you're supposed to do.
Same here. I hate having more feminine traits despite the fact I never want to be like my mom and she was a terrible parent. Divorce courts need a massive overhaul. That said if you lose your father idk what you're supposed to do.
>>256209
Same here. I hate having more feminine traits despite the fact I never want to be like my mom and she was a terrible parent. Divorce courts need a massive overhaul. That said if you lose your father idk what you're supposed to do.
Same here. I hate having more feminine traits despite the fact I never want to be like my mom and she was a terrible parent. Divorce courts need a massive overhaul. That said if you lose your father idk what you're supposed to do.
>>256209
Indeed it is mostly a frame of reference thing. Wizards seem to look back fondly at childhood because they had video games and such to escape from reality without the need to work to survive. But if you compare that to normalfags who were traeted well by their peers, always going out and doing fun things with friends, making good memories and accomplishments, you realize the wizard's childhood was actually really lame.
While those wizards who did not have escapism because their family was really poor or they were outright abused don't even have such a sense of relative happiness. Maybe for them adult life is even preferable?
Indeed it is mostly a frame of reference thing. Wizards seem to look back fondly at childhood because they had video games and such to escape from reality without the need to work to survive. But if you compare that to normalfags who were traeted well by their peers, always going out and doing fun things with friends, making good memories and accomplishments, you realize the wizard's childhood was actually really lame.
While those wizards who did not have escapism because their family was really poor or they were outright abused don't even have such a sense of relative happiness. Maybe for them adult life is even preferable?
>>256962
>While those wizards who did not have escapism because their family was really poor or they were outright abused don't even have such a sense of relative happiness. Maybe for them adult life is even preferable?
Perhaps it is, but I find it impossible to not dwell on the wonders of childhood. Being stupid but young so few if any real consequences fall upon you. Young love, finding a passion, having a real family to form memories with. Someone has to eat shit, by God's rng it's us. I only wish that normals could understand what it's like to have a life like this. Not necessarily help wizards or feel pity or whatever, but understand that when I stutter in public it's my fault partly but it's also the fact that I didn't have a good childhood, good genes, whatever.
>While those wizards who did not have escapism because their family was really poor or they were outright abused don't even have such a sense of relative happiness. Maybe for them adult life is even preferable?
Perhaps it is, but I find it impossible to not dwell on the wonders of childhood. Being stupid but young so few if any real consequences fall upon you. Young love, finding a passion, having a real family to form memories with. Someone has to eat shit, by God's rng it's us. I only wish that normals could understand what it's like to have a life like this. Not necessarily help wizards or feel pity or whatever, but understand that when I stutter in public it's my fault partly but it's also the fact that I didn't have a good childhood, good genes, whatever.
>>257119
>it's my fault partly
That's an illusion drilled into you by cultural brainwashing. You can't help who you are; it could help you a lot to contemplate that
>>256962
>Maybe for them adult life is even preferable?
Definitely true for me. The peak of my life began at about 29 years old. I was unhappy from about 5 years old onward when school started 5 days a week. It seems silly to try to remember what my consciousness was like when I was younger than that, I just dont even remember.
Of course you still make excellent points and I feel a huge sense of loss (not sure if that's the correct word) that i'll never experience those things that most people do in their youth. Even just today I saw a video of some Ukrainian children seeing their dad after he returned from a warzone and hugging him in happiness. I never had any connection like that with another human being. If i could press a button that would kill my immediate family with no repercussions on me I would do it
>it's my fault partly
That's an illusion drilled into you by cultural brainwashing. You can't help who you are; it could help you a lot to contemplate that
>>256962
>Maybe for them adult life is even preferable?
Definitely true for me. The peak of my life began at about 29 years old. I was unhappy from about 5 years old onward when school started 5 days a week. It seems silly to try to remember what my consciousness was like when I was younger than that, I just dont even remember.
Of course you still make excellent points and I feel a huge sense of loss (not sure if that's the correct word) that i'll never experience those things that most people do in their youth. Even just today I saw a video of some Ukrainian children seeing their dad after he returned from a warzone and hugging him in happiness. I never had any connection like that with another human being. If i could press a button that would kill my immediate family with no repercussions on me I would do it
>>257125
>That's an illusion drilled into you by cultural brainwashing. You can't help who you are; it could help you a lot to contemplate that
I think there's a free will argument to be had there anon. I doubt humans run on free will, but I like to imagine it exists.
>That's an illusion drilled into you by cultural brainwashing. You can't help who you are; it could help you a lot to contemplate that
I think there's a free will argument to be had there anon. I doubt humans run on free will, but I like to imagine it exists.
>>257127
I think it is better that it doesnt exist, at least on an individual level. It frees you from many negative emotions: guilt, shame, etc. My view of this follows Buddhist teachings in which realisation of no-self leads to enlightenment.
I think it is better that it doesnt exist, at least on an individual level. It frees you from many negative emotions: guilt, shame, etc. My view of this follows Buddhist teachings in which realisation of no-self leads to enlightenment.
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>>256169
I feel like my childhood delayed my development. other people my age that I see were free to grow and develop, they didn't have to live in the same conditions that I had to live through.
they focused on their hobbies, interests, like video games, watching anime, movies, shows, books, and some I've seen do hobbies like making music and stuff…
I feel like I'm behind all of that… so it's hard for me to connect to people. all I know is to talk about the conflicts that happened in the country that I lived in, and my depression… and of course, people don't wanna hear that, which is totally fair.
I try to keep up with whatever vidya, anime, and that bullshit… but I just can't do it.. there's a lot of stuff I missed out on.
but yeah, that's one aspect how my bad childhood and teenage years fucked me up as an adult, now I can't even talk to people. I don't even have friends…
I feel like my childhood delayed my development. other people my age that I see were free to grow and develop, they didn't have to live in the same conditions that I had to live through.
they focused on their hobbies, interests, like video games, watching anime, movies, shows, books, and some I've seen do hobbies like making music and stuff…
I feel like I'm behind all of that… so it's hard for me to connect to people. all I know is to talk about the conflicts that happened in the country that I lived in, and my depression… and of course, people don't wanna hear that, which is totally fair.
I try to keep up with whatever vidya, anime, and that bullshit… but I just can't do it.. there's a lot of stuff I missed out on.
but yeah, that's one aspect how my bad childhood and teenage years fucked me up as an adult, now I can't even talk to people. I don't even have friends…
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>>257441
I can relate to you, but missing out on media should be the least of your worries I think, nothing keeps you from consuming and getting into stuff even in your 80s if you wish.
The only thing I regret growing up in a place that I didn't want to be, was my lack of confidence to get out of there and broaden my worldview, trying out things that could have helped me find out what I would be able to do for a living for example, instead of sitting in my room waiting to die like I still do, I always wondered what I would be doing after growing up, but I never walked anywhere to find out
I can relate to you, but missing out on media should be the least of your worries I think, nothing keeps you from consuming and getting into stuff even in your 80s if you wish.
The only thing I regret growing up in a place that I didn't want to be, was my lack of confidence to get out of there and broaden my worldview, trying out things that could have helped me find out what I would be able to do for a living for example, instead of sitting in my room waiting to die like I still do, I always wondered what I would be doing after growing up, but I never walked anywhere to find out
>>257441
Maybe you can use your childhood to create believable stories, people that grew up without worries or started very soon probably have a harder time relating to suffering for example, or miss life experience that makes you relatable, like experience that you only get by living for a long time
Maybe you can use your childhood to create believable stories, people that grew up without worries or started very soon probably have a harder time relating to suffering for example, or miss life experience that makes you relatable, like experience that you only get by living for a long time
I had allot of trauma as a kid fell through the cracks in school, not diagnosed, inadequate help and stuck in a corner alone. Seeing specialists who couldn't even see what I was . I have more but that's some of what I had I was mute for a few years
>>257441
man while i cant relate to not having friends i can relate to a lot of this. best advice i can give is to just be honest to yourself and others, be open minded, and put in some effort. you're able to acknowledge your flaws so why not work on some of them? and i know you are probably annoyed with how generic that all sounds. but thats really all there is to it.
then again, it seems like you are fine being with being antisocial, or maybe you're just trying to convince yourself you are
man while i cant relate to not having friends i can relate to a lot of this. best advice i can give is to just be honest to yourself and others, be open minded, and put in some effort. you're able to acknowledge your flaws so why not work on some of them? and i know you are probably annoyed with how generic that all sounds. but thats really all there is to it.
then again, it seems like you are fine being with being antisocial, or maybe you're just trying to convince yourself you are
Childhood was ok overall, though when my mom would have mental breakdowns she'd be locked up for months at a time and i had to spend my time at the neighbors, weird indian family that made me sit in an empty room for hours after school. It was tortuous as I was continuously wondering why I had to do that, my home was next door and my playstation, toys, outside sticks to play with were waiting for me
Even the happiness of a cushy childhood is almost nothing. We are not gods. We're nodes, neurons. We're not meant to feel anything at a meaningful depth.
for some reason I only have fond memories from childhood, I got to know all of my neighbors friends' houses playing videogames, table tennis or whatever, played outside a lot with them too, hanged out with my younger brother and created many games for both of us to play. But then I became a shut-in at age 13… I was alone at night on Christmas holiday, watching that South Park episode on which Cartman stimulates a dog to orgasm, and all of my siblings were outside with their friends. That day I saw the abyss in front of me… no idea how I got there.
>>257765
Not him but I'm at a loss myself whether I am just antisocial because I am the way I am or because I'm convincing myself that I am. I don't know. I don't think I like a lot of other people.
Not him but I'm at a loss myself whether I am just antisocial because I am the way I am or because I'm convincing myself that I am. I don't know. I don't think I like a lot of other people.
I don't know why I'm so passively pliant. I suspect it's a fuck storm of issues.
My father is avoidant detached type. Some random thing would set him off and he'd go silent for months. Going to work. Coming home. Doing nothing. Just have dinner then watch TV then go to bed. Not talking to anyone. Then one day going back to normal like nothing ever happened.
Some times he'd explode in a ball of rage before it. Some times he'd just go silent. Leaving us to wonder what happened. Maybe something. Maybe nothing. Nobody ever knows.
With my mom is panicky anxiety riddled reverse parent type of situation. I used to think it was all me being a bundle of nerves. A weak little shit. After 20 years of being in this family, my brother in law had recently been dropping hints that she stresses him the fuck out. I grew up thinking it was all me. I was the one my mom developed a codependency on so basically I was the black hole to sink all her shit into.
I don't know how to describe it but it's like her basic demeanor is just fucking exhausting. She has no friends herself. Now that I'm old and more cognitive to these things, seeing her try to interact with random people I can see how she imparts this on them with basic interactions, it's like can you dial it back 1000x, lady. It's like some kind of telekinetic villain or something that activates the stress center in other peoples brain makes them want to dig their nails out crawling up the walls to escape her presence. I just can't pin it down to how or what exactly about the way she is.
I guess things like this are why I'm so afraid of stepping on peoples toes. Always paranoid on hyper vigilance that I might do the wrong thing for some random reason.
Of course there's the childhood bullies. Man did they ever have their way with me. I am the deer in the headlights freeze response type. Basically a mindless idiot for anyone to fuck with.
I guess part of me was too dumb, naive, and desperate to make friends. To find some kind of connection outside of my fucked up home life. I let anyone walk all over me for the slightest bit of attention. Also the broken set of norms at home left me with no concept of the spectrum of how to interact with different people.
My father is avoidant detached type. Some random thing would set him off and he'd go silent for months. Going to work. Coming home. Doing nothing. Just have dinner then watch TV then go to bed. Not talking to anyone. Then one day going back to normal like nothing ever happened.
Some times he'd explode in a ball of rage before it. Some times he'd just go silent. Leaving us to wonder what happened. Maybe something. Maybe nothing. Nobody ever knows.
With my mom is panicky anxiety riddled reverse parent type of situation. I used to think it was all me being a bundle of nerves. A weak little shit. After 20 years of being in this family, my brother in law had recently been dropping hints that she stresses him the fuck out. I grew up thinking it was all me. I was the one my mom developed a codependency on so basically I was the black hole to sink all her shit into.
I don't know how to describe it but it's like her basic demeanor is just fucking exhausting. She has no friends herself. Now that I'm old and more cognitive to these things, seeing her try to interact with random people I can see how she imparts this on them with basic interactions, it's like can you dial it back 1000x, lady. It's like some kind of telekinetic villain or something that activates the stress center in other peoples brain makes them want to dig their nails out crawling up the walls to escape her presence. I just can't pin it down to how or what exactly about the way she is.
I guess things like this are why I'm so afraid of stepping on peoples toes. Always paranoid on hyper vigilance that I might do the wrong thing for some random reason.
Of course there's the childhood bullies. Man did they ever have their way with me. I am the deer in the headlights freeze response type. Basically a mindless idiot for anyone to fuck with.
I guess part of me was too dumb, naive, and desperate to make friends. To find some kind of connection outside of my fucked up home life. I let anyone walk all over me for the slightest bit of attention. Also the broken set of norms at home left me with no concept of the spectrum of how to interact with different people.
Anyone else have alcoholic parents? There was so much domestic violence in the household. Usually police would come over once a year it felt like. I remember seeing my parents drunk so many times, any time I smell cheap beer it makes me think back to those times. Surprisingly I was never taken away, I remember both of my parents manipulating me to tell police and DCF to lie about what was going on. Also had tons of neglect and my dad never taught me anything about being a man. Mom used to do coke too with me in the other room, I could always hear her getting it ready and snorting, it was so obvious but she tried to hide it anyways.
>>256169
>So many people on Wizardchan had a happy childhood
who said this? i think that a bad childhood is a big reason as to why anyone would end up here. i was neglected my entire life and i never enjoyed my life even as a child. i always felt like i was in one of those "i took a picture of myself everyday for xxx years" videos but the video never ends and nothin g never changes.my dead eyes are right where i left them and the days are as dull as rocks. robin williams said something like its not the worst thing to end up alone, but be surrounded by people that make you feel alone instead. its unreasonable to interact with people that were never there for you the way they were to me
>So many people on Wizardchan had a happy childhood
who said this? i think that a bad childhood is a big reason as to why anyone would end up here. i was neglected my entire life and i never enjoyed my life even as a child. i always felt like i was in one of those "i took a picture of myself everyday for xxx years" videos but the video never ends and nothin g never changes.my dead eyes are right where i left them and the days are as dull as rocks. robin williams said something like its not the worst thing to end up alone, but be surrounded by people that make you feel alone instead. its unreasonable to interact with people that were never there for you the way they were to me
>>256169
A lot of people dont realise their childhood was terrible because they have nothing to compare it to
A lot of people dont realise their childhood was terrible because they have nothing to compare it to
>>258837
This is very relatable, I had a passive, weak and detached father with no social skills and a controlling mother with OCD and anxiety. They didn't care about the outcome of their children and thought they do everything right because they were never "abusive".
I adapted all the problems of my parents along with other mental stuff because I was emotionally neglected, it's like they were too oblivious to understand what's going on but at the same time they reacted to my mental health problems as if I was just born that way and sent me to therapists who put me on meds.
I've been humiliated by other people from school to adult life because I've been a passive weakling not able to stand up for myself and some of these things trigger extreme rage in me like I have some sort of PTSD because a lot of things were dehumanizing.
I grew up thinking I'm some alien retard and it took me over two decades to realize that my mental issues are a direct result of their bad parenting and even though my brother is still in therapy for similar stuff they still don't think that they somehow messed up and that's why I have a hard time forgiving them.
Even though my life is still a mess I was able to improve a lot by distancing myself from my parents and finding mentor figures to listen to online, it's quite weird how I learnt more from strangers on the internet than from my own father.
This is very relatable, I had a passive, weak and detached father with no social skills and a controlling mother with OCD and anxiety. They didn't care about the outcome of their children and thought they do everything right because they were never "abusive".
I adapted all the problems of my parents along with other mental stuff because I was emotionally neglected, it's like they were too oblivious to understand what's going on but at the same time they reacted to my mental health problems as if I was just born that way and sent me to therapists who put me on meds.
I've been humiliated by other people from school to adult life because I've been a passive weakling not able to stand up for myself and some of these things trigger extreme rage in me like I have some sort of PTSD because a lot of things were dehumanizing.
I grew up thinking I'm some alien retard and it took me over two decades to realize that my mental issues are a direct result of their bad parenting and even though my brother is still in therapy for similar stuff they still don't think that they somehow messed up and that's why I have a hard time forgiving them.
Even though my life is still a mess I was able to improve a lot by distancing myself from my parents and finding mentor figures to listen to online, it's quite weird how I learnt more from strangers on the internet than from my own father.
>>258978
It's mainly self-improvement/podcast stuff but I didn't elaborate on which people I like to listen to because it was obvious that somebody would get butthurt over it.
There's actually a lot of good things to learn from out there you just have to filter out the usual normie stuff.
It's mainly self-improvement/podcast stuff but I didn't elaborate on which people I like to listen to because it was obvious that somebody would get butthurt over it.
There's actually a lot of good things to learn from out there you just have to filter out the usual normie stuff.
>>258980
Why the hostility, I don't really watch a lot of Jordan Peterson but some of what I saw was not bad.
Sam Hyde is one of the people who I was able to learn a lot from if not the most, his hydewars stuff has a lot of value if you're open to it.
Why the hostility, I don't really watch a lot of Jordan Peterson but some of what I saw was not bad.
Sam Hyde is one of the people who I was able to learn a lot from if not the most, his hydewars stuff has a lot of value if you're open to it.
>>258989
how you think you are learning anything from a sex-addicted art student with almost no real world experience is beyond me. you must be very naive.
how you think you are learning anything from a sex-addicted art student with almost no real world experience is beyond me. you must be very naive.
>>258989
That's…well, that's even worse. I mean, I like Sam Hyde, but you need to take a step back and look at state of that man's life in order to determine whether his advice is worth taking.
That's…well, that's even worse. I mean, I like Sam Hyde, but you need to take a step back and look at state of that man's life in order to determine whether his advice is worth taking.
>>258992
In the interest of making sure these posts don't get pruned and to prevent further thread derailment, I suggest we stop here. I know your pride is hurt but you'll have to come up with better defenses besides accusing everyone of being the same person.
In the interest of making sure these posts don't get pruned and to prevent further thread derailment, I suggest we stop here. I know your pride is hurt but you'll have to come up with better defenses besides accusing everyone of being the same person.
>>258992
consider going back to 4chan with these lame trite copouts. never wouldve guessed some ~20 year old dweeb who subscribes to forced meme gurus would also utterly fail at logic and just shit out mindless as hominem in defense of his surrogate fathers.
consider going back to 4chan with these lame trite copouts. never wouldve guessed some ~20 year old dweeb who subscribes to forced meme gurus would also utterly fail at logic and just shit out mindless as hominem in defense of his surrogate fathers.
>>258993
No use reasoning with someone who thinks it's impossible that more than one person here can't hate Peterson
No use reasoning with someone who thinks it's impossible that more than one person here can't hate Peterson
>>258993
>>258996
>>258998
>>258997
This is just sad, you seem really upset and definitely like the type of shithead who doesn't want people to better their lives so stay sad and fucked up if that's what you want, I couldn't care less and you are still samefagging which anyone who knows how this board works will notice. Hope you find a way to be less miserable some day.
>>258996
>>258998
>>258997
This is just sad, you seem really upset and definitely like the type of shithead who doesn't want people to better their lives so stay sad and fucked up if that's what you want, I couldn't care less and you are still samefagging which anyone who knows how this board works will notice. Hope you find a way to be less miserable some day.
having "meme gurus" as >>258996 put it as models or father figures is irredeemably pathetic, whoever they are and whatever they may say. even if it's some actual intellectual with real insight, to look up to them so much that you would think of them as mentor figures is sad.
sam hyde… lol.
sam hyde… lol.
>>259017
OK faggot we get it you don't like learning from other people who happen to know a thing or two
OK faggot we get it you don't like learning from other people who happen to know a thing or two
>>256204
Same. At least when you were a child you had hope for the future, but now that you're an adult you realize that there is no escape.
Same. At least when you were a child you had hope for the future, but now that you're an adult you realize that there is no escape.
>>259062
Not really, when I was 10 I could never imagine living to 30-40 let alone 70 like normals.I always wanted to kill myself yet I’m 29 years old misareble NEET who never worked in his life but I’m really sure I won’t see my forties I have to kill myself.
Not really, when I was 10 I could never imagine living to 30-40 let alone 70 like normals.I always wanted to kill myself yet I’m 29 years old misareble NEET who never worked in his life but I’m really sure I won’t see my forties I have to kill myself.