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/dep/ - Depression

Depression

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File: 1658646342835.jpg (46.22 KB, 719x703, 719:703, 1658249192359548.jpg) ImgOps iqdb

 No.262158

All my life at least since I was like 8 different people would pick on me for no reason or betray or abandon me. I never bothered anybody yet people would be hostile or bully me out of nowhere. Friends would stop talking to me or become hostile to me without explanation, or wouls it be enough for somebody to say something bad to one of said friends to become hostile to me after years. This continued in high school. I managed to have a sort of group of friends but the same thing happened. There was for example a guy who I was ok with him and outta nowhere he refused to greet me and would look at me making smug faces and outright started bothering me at recess one day. Later years people would be extremely harsh with me for stuff they would pass or ignore on other people. For example there was a succubus (she was a neo nazi and very fucked up in the head) who I was sorta friend for a year yet she became hyper hostile against me for a small comment I once made to her. To the point of reacting aggressively and never talking to me again and doing bad comments against me every once. This continued even in college. I even tried to confront politely friends who suddenly for no reason stopped talking to me and all I got was evasives or staring at me like a soulless npc or even aggressions.

Same thing in the street, if there's a beggar or my country's version of the jogger he'll come to bother me outta all the possible people. There were weaker and weirder people at school yet none of those were picked, ever. And the only time I fought back I was called a violent monster by succubus classmate (I only slapped the bully on his face. He once stomped 3 times the head of another classmate, yet I'm the violent…)

I tried everything, from being nice, to being "myself", I've thought it was a punishment from god or karma and accepted it for a while (which fucked me up mentally even more). Yet to this day I don't even understand why people are like this with me

For the record I'm average and almost always used to dress normal, with nothing strange. Nowadays I'm mostly a silent character and dress "aggressively" (like a bodyguard, with sunglasses and everything) and carry pepper spray, and weapons just in case and even tough people avoid me more, I can notice when some people take that same approach, like they want to be hostile with me for no reason but since I don't give them any reason to do so by being as irrelevant as possible, they like seethe and sometimes seem to try to provoke me with indirect words which I always ignore

While writting this I am remembering a lot of said incidents (I have very deep memory) and it saddens me even more.

Have any of you wizzies experienced this? How do you deal with it?

 No.262160

Fuck, forgot the subject and can't delete the thread. Sorry wizzies

 No.262162

>>262158
Perhaps unbeknownst to you, you're some kind of ultra-Chad and people are trying to challenge you because you're too threatening? I've heard from normie posts that this actually happens.

 No.262164

>>262162
This actually does happen. Normie men will gangpile autistic or mentally slow chads out of vindictive jealousy. People make out it's just foids that are catty and petty, but men do that stuff pretty hard out.

 No.262169

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that shit is kinda familiar, tho in my case people just got used to bullying me out of nowhere until I did something to stop it. Ig that really could be due to the jealousy and gossips or whatsoever.
well, at least with carrying the pepper spray and stuff now you are more prepared

 No.262170

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>>262158
This happens because of you looking after them, instead of always letting the opposite happen.

There is nothing to understand, do not investigate, since they are just being insincere towards you. Did the succubus called you "violent monster"? That's simply great.

Why are you actually sad? Because of living in an evil world that wants you submissive and drained?

You might be what is usually called an omicron male, as >>262162 distantly addresses. Being this >>262164 a somehow funny part about occupying this rare place inside the social hierarchies, make them burn their souls in outrage.

You sad? Communicate your insatisfaction to the world, preach your values if you can… completing with so, the ultimate role of the omicron

Surely the second tab suits you the most: https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Omicron+Male

 No.262178

>>262164
this happened to me in the wizcord, the voice chatting betas kicked me out

 No.262238

>>262164
True. The meme about men being direct and frontal exists only in /pol/'s mind

 No.262239

>>262164
I'm a bit chaddish physically very tall and stocky and yeah as soon as some people especially men figure out that i'm not going to use it to my advantage and that i'm kinda autistic and slow they want to eat me alive. Not all people are like that of course but it does seem to have an impact sometimes, especially when around the insecure normie type.

 No.262282

>>262238
You must also add being unexpected after looking coward. Then they get a bit blocked.

 No.262288

>>262239
Normies utterly hate autists. That is all there is to it.

They will not hesitate to show it to you ever since your childhood.

 No.262290

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>>262288
Has "socialization" ever done aspies any good?

Ted Kaczynski was an aspie with a high paying career, and became happier once he fucked off to his cabin.

I wish us male autists got treated like female autists. We get left alone to be smelly NEETs and not perpetually shamed into making something of ourselves. Constantly told we need to seek validation from normies.

 No.262316

>>262290
This. We should be left alone

 No.262317


 No.262321

This has been my experience as well, I'm a typical schizo autist but people don't spot that at first, then when they notice that something is different they either start to treat me like an animal or try to bully me.

There are people who will just start to ignore me but there are also guys who tried to take advantage of my lack of social intelligence and succubi usually just start being hostile.

I got to know a lot of different people because I have a dog and people including succubi would approach me and start conversations, then after walking into each other 2-3 times they start to become hostile by giving me weird looks or ignoring me even though I've always been respectful but I guess if you don't meet their social needs they will get angry at you. To be fair there have been men who would still respect me in a "he's probably disabled or done upstairs" kinda way and that's fine but succubi always have to make sure to visibly show hostility and I think the reason for this is their demand for constant social validation and attention.

I get that some people are not just socially retarded but also irritating and annoying but I really don't act like that, I'm just mellow and quiet.

 No.262322

>>262321
I was forced into being a normalfaggot by my family. And while people took pity on me because I was affable and clearly trying in life, and was a sort of naturally friendly person that was an open book, if they were in a bad mood or in a social setting they would fuck with me.

It's strange how normalfags are visceral sorts of animals and have no self awareness about their behavior, and can compartmentalize everything and just go through on instinct.

One good example of this is how bydlo will go "hurr durr, pedophiles should get fed to the woodchipper". I worked with a pedophile that had raped two children before he started with us. All those "kill all pedophiles" faggots went out drinking with him in the weekend and hung out with him socially. He had a loving wife and kids and despite being a full on social parasite, he got by fine. That's the level of compartmentalization normalfaggots are capable of.

 No.262323

>>262158

yes, very similar experience. In my case due to looks and body language (I look like a fucking weirdo and I can't do much about it, I have tried but it only got A LOT worst because they stop pitting me as much).

> How do you deal with it?


On the street I do the same that you do, I'm very aggressive and I noticed that to avoid random people insulting me I need to stare them down and they coward (one of these days I'm going to get a beating for doing this but I'm tired of the unprovoked abuse).

Because of this, I always use sun glasses because it's easy to stare people down with them. Body language is also key. If I get distracted for a moment then I have about 30% provability of getting insulted (usually they murmur the insult loud enough for me to hear it). For example, the last time it happen I walked half a block to take out the trash and I crossed a succubi with 2 children and a solo guy and the guy insulted me. When I glanced at him to stared him down he was looking in another direction and he turned when I made noise with the trash container and then insulted me before I had a chance to look back at him and stare him down.

> While writting this I am remembering a lot of said incidents (I have very deep memory) and it saddens me even more.


All my memories are like these, with a few very good years in between with a couple of groups of very good of friends that ended up turning on my as you describe. I was always the weirdo that they pitied any way.

So, most of the time I resort to isolation. I rarely leave the house. I'm tired of trying only to get back at the bottom of the pit for no good reason at all. I'm a really nice and very respectful person, I'm not the problem, they are just garbage.

 No.262342

>>262322
>if they were in a bad mood or in a social setting they would fuck with me
>normalfags are visceral sorts of animals and have no self awareness about their behavior, and can compartmentalize everything and just go through on instinct.
This is why I just cannot understand the exaltation of "social skills" and "socialization". They interact like hierarchical animals with no sense of grace, cooperation, empathy, or any so called "human" attributes.
>"hurr durr, pedophiles should get fed to the woodchipper". I worked with a pedophile that had raped two children before he started with us. All those "kill all pedophiles" faggots went out drinking with him in the weekend and hung out with him socially. He had a loving wife and kids and despite being a full on social parasite, he got by fine. That's the level of compartmentalization normalfaggots are capable of.
You must understand the modern humans morality stops when it starts inconveniencing them, do not expect anything.

 No.262345

>>262321
>There are people who will just start to ignore me but there are also guys who tried to take advantage of my lack of social intelligence and succubi usually just start being hostile.
The outright anger is what always takes me by surprise. I know there are some autists who say stupid, offensive and annoying things, but I'm just a very quiet person. I don't do anything to offend anyone. Yet people get visibly angry at me for reasons I cannot comprehend, just because I'm quiet. They start yelling and growling at me. It still takes me off guard how suddenly they go from, "patient and understanding" to outright growling at me.

 No.262346

>>262345
>Yet people get visibly angry at me for reasons I cannot comprehend, just because I'm quiet. They start yelling and growling at me. It still takes me off guard how suddenly they go from, "patient and understanding" to outright growling at me.
They beome personally offended if someone doesn't speak to them, most have severe inferiority complexes and need acceptance & soothing at every turn.

 No.262357

>>262345
>but I'm just a very quiet person. I don't do anything to offend anyone.

Excessive agreeableness is actually a response to trauma, and a form of learned helplessness. Funnily enough if you were a full on loudmouthed, arrogant sperg you'd be better off kek. Laughed at, sure, isolated, definitely. But you'd miss all that negative shit you had to suffer through.

 No.262361

>>262345
Don't take it personally. You are just seen as weak and as someone they can unleash their fury and frustrations on. Normals are cowards who prey on those who can't defend themselves. They are too afraid to embrace a conflict with anyone that is even remotely perceived as a possible threat.

 No.262362

>>262178
I'm still banned from the wizcord after three years for no reason.

 No.262368

The posts here really resonate with me. Was about to post walls of text about my experiences but decided not to every time because they seemed kinda full of myself and superfluous, you all already said what was to be said anyway. It's all really confusing cause i can't believe that i'm somehow special enough to bring out the worst in people, at this point i just try to not give a flying shit

 No.262371

I'm fat and ugly so I always get that treatment, never been anything more than a punching bang in any group

 No.262413

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>>262345
>>262345
There's no need to comprehend something, but that you are just in dire to be ready for their parasitic crap which constantly will drip on you. Stop asking why and give an answer yourself to those deviants

 No.262440

Do any of you think this is some sort if karma?

 No.262663

This is depresding and scary at the same time. This thread is exactly what I experienced all my life. People will pick on me for no apparent reason even if I do nothing. It's like they have a radar. I'm horrified to this day to know what is the reason of this

 No.262767

>>262663
That you still keep yourself asking why instead of constantly getting ready to backlash their multiple ways of manipulation.


this doesn't stop it, but you get to enjoy

 No.265126

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literally same

idk i will try to become mean and evil even tho i dont like it or i will just kill myself

 No.265923

>>265126
don't kill yourself wizzie, don't let the groids win. you're worth more than them

 No.266083

It's a conspiracy! A conspiracy against YOU and all other wizards who have gone through that same thing as you have!

 No.266087

Some people just fucking hate you man. I lived pretty normie for a while when younger and I’ve had the same conversation about 5 times. One of the few people who liked me would bring up how someone they knew just hated me, and even they didn’t know why. One guy tried to fight me. Most people think I’m weird and 99% of succubi disliked me whatever, but a minority thought it was weird in a good way. I had a friend defend me when their girlfriend was saying how she wanted me to leave before she came over because she hated being around me.

I’m lucky enough to have made a handful of friends over the years who I lived with and liked me despite me being weird. I haven’t seen them in over a decade now - but even if you break through the lower barriers of normie hood there’s still this irrational hatred of you for some reason. Working lower class jobs like warehouse work leads to people picking on you for entertainment, dudes would steal my drink and stuff.

Just the social reality of the wizard gene.

 No.266132

>>265126
don't do it, cute anon
*hugs*

 No.266136

>>266132
He probably isn't cute and you should let him do what he wants

 No.266139

>>262440

I don't see how it would be Karma. sometimes i think it has to do with astrological zodiac signs. being unattractive or awkward definitely does not cut it because i've seen infinite examples of why it doesn't suffice. maybe people here are really special, in the very metaphysical level. maybe the ancient gnostics and the modern Matrix conspiracy theory proposers are right, people here may have an elevated element that doesn't match that of the average hylic.

 No.266169

>>266136
Yea im not cute I'm ugly as fuck

 No.266208

>>262158
"Wizard" talks about his succubus friend who started being mean to him. Not a single person in this thread has any issue with it.

Wizardchan 2022.

 No.266616

>>262440
Karma is invented or even simply made up concept by demons as excuse to fuck with you.

 No.266624


 No.266627

>>266139
Not not maybe, but is not that wizzies and autists are pious per se, but its just normalfags are so repulsive and disgusting that by comparison makes us or anyone who isn't normalfag look holy.

 No.266649

>>266208
more like wizchan 2014 -2022

 No.267962

>>266208
Hi newfriend. Seems like gender wasn't the issue here but the continuous reject OP has gone by. Le ebin magic wizard who hates everybody since being a baby is not a real thing. Have this in consideration

 No.272079

My life has been pretty much the same, OP. I resorted to everything from theraphy to self improvement to astrology to try to understand what's the cause of this and still today it's the same thing. I wanna kill myself

 No.272164

God dam even the library director where i go everyday started acting kind of like this targetting me everyday even after getting kind of friendly with me all of a sudden.

Has anyone been targeted/kept getting bothered or authority harassed because you let yourself open to them?

 No.272236

>>272079
I like you wiz. Just hang on, man.

 No.272237

I call it the Satanic cycle. It's a ritual sacrifice - once someone is "it", the game continues. As it turns out, you're not the only one. It's a machine, and once they're done with you, they push the cycle on the next sacrifice. There are people heavily invested in this cycle, since it gives them both free resources/money and is security against the greatest threat we face - other fucking people. Those who believe in the cycle will go out of their way to perpetuate it, and if you ever tell them they can't have it, they will shriek like madmen like you murdered someone.

There isn't much to understand. They charge a cost so that people are made to live. Any mafia knows how to run a protection racket, and the state is the biggest mafia of all.

What these people want is a chilling effect where no one is ever safe, because those are the conditions where exploitation can be maximized. Basic managerial training tells managers to initiate these minor slights repeatedly. It's not done because this way is efficient or makes employees productive, but because it favors depopulation and torture for torture's sake, and that is life's prime want according to the moral philosophy we live under. There is no way to reason with them and they do not care about any counterargument. They know exactly what they are doing, and you can see them looking to an authority figure for approval when they start this shit. Many times teachers encourage the cycle if the kids do not initiate it organically, and they like to pick kids who are borderline sped and threaten them with sped if they don't initiate the Satanic cycle.

Educational settings are the worst for this shit. Those places are so ridiculous that I don't know what anyone thinks they're getting out of it. It's just another protection racket.

There isn't much to be done about this, except to treasure the time alone and know that it is bullshit when it starts. The goal of those people is to make everyone exactly like them and uphold their universal ideal of a screaming fanatical Nazi maniac, but most people unsurprisingly do not want that goal. It's always the goal of a minority that needs to believe that they're the only true humans.

I'm writing more about this subject but I don't want to release it to the general public until I have a presentable book.

 No.272250

>>262368
Anger is a dominance thing, that's what you're missing. It's not that you're doing anything wrong, it's that they're doing the human equivalent of a hen pecking another hen.

 No.272288

>>265126
stay cute anony

 No.272430

>>272164
Take advantage of it. What's so wrong about getting targeted by a burocrat? Having denied access?

If I were you I print every single borrowed book from that place and deleting the prints so no one knows where the copies came from.

 No.272474

>>272430
How do i take advantage? I already talked to her boss and i havent heard anything from her again

 No.272478




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