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Share your various traumatic experiences that still haunts you to this very day.
OP here: I'll start,
>Mom brings her best friend's son over to stay with us for "2 weeks" due to a nasty divorce
>He's a balding, 6'3 gigachad war vet
>At first he's ok but he gradually devolves into terrorizing and bullying all of us and especially me
>At one point, I'm watching TV and he rips out the cord and screams "SUCK MY BALLS" despite my family feeding and housing him for literally free for months
>Gets in my face and stares at me with murderous eyes
>I pussy out because I'm a long haired 5'8 skinny drug addict loser
>He finally grabs the remote and leaves
I know it's probably not very traumatic compared to most others in this place but I still think about this absolutely every single day months later.
>Mom brings her best friend's son over to stay with us for "2 weeks" due to a nasty divorce
>He's a balding, 6'3 gigachad war vet
>At first he's ok but he gradually devolves into terrorizing and bullying all of us and especially me
>At one point, I'm watching TV and he rips out the cord and screams "SUCK MY BALLS" despite my family feeding and housing him for literally free for months
>Gets in my face and stares at me with murderous eyes
>I pussy out because I'm a long haired 5'8 skinny drug addict loser
>He finally grabs the remote and leaves
I know it's probably not very traumatic compared to most others in this place but I still think about this absolutely every single day months later.
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>>267761
What the fuck
What the fuck
>>267762
It’s insane how there are people that are homeless from actual misfortune, but the people that seek out a situation where they’re provided free housing outside of a shelter are fucking psychopaths. “Parasitic lifestyle” is part of the diagnostic criteria for antisocial disorders for a reason. People like that will treat people they’re totally financially dependent on worse than normal people would treat a rabid dog or their sworn enemy.
I had a similar situation for years with a family member. Chaos demons.
It’s insane how there are people that are homeless from actual misfortune, but the people that seek out a situation where they’re provided free housing outside of a shelter are fucking psychopaths. “Parasitic lifestyle” is part of the diagnostic criteria for antisocial disorders for a reason. People like that will treat people they’re totally financially dependent on worse than normal people would treat a rabid dog or their sworn enemy.
I had a similar situation for years with a family member. Chaos demons.
>>267765
Well he's now actually homeless sleeping in a van in some bushland so I can at least cope with that. You're exactly correct, some people are rabid dogs that cannot be helped.
Well he's now actually homeless sleeping in a van in some bushland so I can at least cope with that. You're exactly correct, some people are rabid dogs that cannot be helped.
My father would be particularly excitable when he was drunk, and he was drunk often. Mind you, he was (is) still very crazy sober.
Thankfully, I was only tormented by his presence during the summer and when I was young. When he would get violent, my stepmother and her children would just leave, and my brother would hide somewhere. I guess he decided that I would make a good teddy bear to bitch about his problems to. I would lie in bed for what felt like hours out of my mind on fear and adrenalin all while he slurred barely conscious curses at other people in my ear. Another time he was yelling at the whole family during a vacation. I guess he saw me amidst the crowd and decided that he'd rather do the teddy bear thing than yell anymore, so he just grabbed me and took me to his room, where I stayed until he fell asleep. I just crawled out of the bed and went back to the rest of the family, exhausted. I slept on a mattress with only a sheet because my stepmother had taken mine. No one in that family thought it was necessary to save me. I imagine they were just enjoying the peace and quiet.
My mother's family is certainly better by comparison, but if I'm being honest, my brain is so riddled with anxiety that I would have no idea if they are treating me well or not. Paranoia and relentless internal self-deprecation has only led me to never really know for sure. Even people I know I'm fine with, if they even look at me for longer than a glance, I want to vacate their line of site instantly. My life has only ever amounted to nervous excursions by necessity punctuated by the peace of not being seen. Being outside the line of sight and hearing of other people is the only time I can relax. Indeed, even the thought that someone can hear me or what I'm doing makes my hair stand up. Because if they can hear me, what could they be saying about me, in their heads? etc.
Ultimately, I don't actually know if I'm crazy. All of this could be an invention of my intense maladaptive daydreaming, and a damaged, anxious mind often lashes out do to self-interest. Can you really blame a starving man for stealing food? I can feel myself being dragged into a very frustrated and resentful place every moment I am around people. It grows and grows until hateful verbal leakage just spills everywhere. I'll likely be remembered to be just as crazy as my father.
Thankfully, I was only tormented by his presence during the summer and when I was young. When he would get violent, my stepmother and her children would just leave, and my brother would hide somewhere. I guess he decided that I would make a good teddy bear to bitch about his problems to. I would lie in bed for what felt like hours out of my mind on fear and adrenalin all while he slurred barely conscious curses at other people in my ear. Another time he was yelling at the whole family during a vacation. I guess he saw me amidst the crowd and decided that he'd rather do the teddy bear thing than yell anymore, so he just grabbed me and took me to his room, where I stayed until he fell asleep. I just crawled out of the bed and went back to the rest of the family, exhausted. I slept on a mattress with only a sheet because my stepmother had taken mine. No one in that family thought it was necessary to save me. I imagine they were just enjoying the peace and quiet.
My mother's family is certainly better by comparison, but if I'm being honest, my brain is so riddled with anxiety that I would have no idea if they are treating me well or not. Paranoia and relentless internal self-deprecation has only led me to never really know for sure. Even people I know I'm fine with, if they even look at me for longer than a glance, I want to vacate their line of site instantly. My life has only ever amounted to nervous excursions by necessity punctuated by the peace of not being seen. Being outside the line of sight and hearing of other people is the only time I can relax. Indeed, even the thought that someone can hear me or what I'm doing makes my hair stand up. Because if they can hear me, what could they be saying about me, in their heads? etc.
Ultimately, I don't actually know if I'm crazy. All of this could be an invention of my intense maladaptive daydreaming, and a damaged, anxious mind often lashes out do to self-interest. Can you really blame a starving man for stealing food? I can feel myself being dragged into a very frustrated and resentful place every moment I am around people. It grows and grows until hateful verbal leakage just spills everywhere. I'll likely be remembered to be just as crazy as my father.
>>267766
Truth. Glad you got him out. Once I finally kicked mine out, his next target apparently had a lower tolerance for demonic behavior and wound up getting driven into assaulting him within a few months. Unfortunately he survived, but it was nice to find out it wasn’t just me. They treat everyone like that.
Truth. Glad you got him out. Once I finally kicked mine out, his next target apparently had a lower tolerance for demonic behavior and wound up getting driven into assaulting him within a few months. Unfortunately he survived, but it was nice to find out it wasn’t just me. They treat everyone like that.
>>267769
Man, “people” that use their kids as therapists and surrogate parents are a special kind of evil.
Man, “people” that use their kids as therapists and surrogate parents are a special kind of evil.
I was physically abused for more than a decade by my mentally ill mother, every single week. I still have nightmares.
Not only that, but my mother also encouraged other people to scream at me and hit me too, specially to my father.
Not only that, but my mother also encouraged other people to scream at me and hit me too, specially to my father.
>>267780
thats probably not the beginning of it, because self-abuse is a form of traumatic acting out
>>267777
quads indicate you need to move out wizzie
>>267762
a common theme of trauma is comparing it to the worst thing imaginable in an attempt to generate gratitude (I think?). Just try to get gratitude from a normal source, so you don't poison that well.
It's hard to feel abused knowing that some people have had it much worse than my relatively tame upbringing. Probably the hardest part is the low-level normalized hate and self hatred that I have to constantly notice and try to re-direct, or the pre-disposition to staying intoxicated for long periods, so I don't have to deal with the world view and feelings I've inherited. Just being raised by violent drunks, probably the best thing I've done is try to see things as a child, and people as children. It's hard to be angry at someone hurting you, if you see they have been a child. Pure cope, but, I guess it might help.
thats probably not the beginning of it, because self-abuse is a form of traumatic acting out
>>267777
quads indicate you need to move out wizzie
>>267762
a common theme of trauma is comparing it to the worst thing imaginable in an attempt to generate gratitude (I think?). Just try to get gratitude from a normal source, so you don't poison that well.
It's hard to feel abused knowing that some people have had it much worse than my relatively tame upbringing. Probably the hardest part is the low-level normalized hate and self hatred that I have to constantly notice and try to re-direct, or the pre-disposition to staying intoxicated for long periods, so I don't have to deal with the world view and feelings I've inherited. Just being raised by violent drunks, probably the best thing I've done is try to see things as a child, and people as children. It's hard to be angry at someone hurting you, if you see they have been a child. Pure cope, but, I guess it might help.
>>268482
You have to practice seeing people as non-objects, and try to practice empathy as much as possible, as well as maintaining patience. But a harder question is why? If you want to stop being parasitic, stop, if you believe your parasitic lifestyle is evidence that your a psychopath, know a psychopath would likely just shrug it off, as "this is fine, and who I am" – so if you think "fuck I must be a psychobath and I don't want to be", a psychopath wouldnt care. More ego-dystonic personality disorders can seem similarly, like BPD, NPD
You have to practice seeing people as non-objects, and try to practice empathy as much as possible, as well as maintaining patience. But a harder question is why? If you want to stop being parasitic, stop, if you believe your parasitic lifestyle is evidence that your a psychopath, know a psychopath would likely just shrug it off, as "this is fine, and who I am" – so if you think "fuck I must be a psychobath and I don't want to be", a psychopath wouldnt care. More ego-dystonic personality disorders can seem similarly, like BPD, NPD
>>268536
it can be a long term state, but i don't think its good. it can feel less painful than getting better (or worse) though
it can be a long term state, but i don't think its good. it can feel less painful than getting better (or worse) though
>>268485
> know a psychopath would likely just shrug it off, as "this is fine, and who I am"
You understand that the majority of users here are considering your posts as disguised flattery? They think being a psychopath is cool, you're only complimenting them and enabling predatory behavior (which btw is more normal than people would like to believe)
> know a psychopath would likely just shrug it off, as "this is fine, and who I am"
You understand that the majority of users here are considering your posts as disguised flattery? They think being a psychopath is cool, you're only complimenting them and enabling predatory behavior (which btw is more normal than people would like to believe)
>>268560
true. sometimes i feel upset and i don't know why well actually it's probably because of my suppressed memory.
true. sometimes i feel upset and i don't know why well actually it's probably because of my suppressed memory.
>>268640
very presumptuous of you to say what the majority of users here think. its what you think. one distuinguisting factor from npd/aspd and bpd is the ego reinforcing aspect, so i dont really care how maladjusted crab worshiping teens take it. they should go 'touch grass'.
very presumptuous of you to say what the majority of users here think. its what you think. one distuinguisting factor from npd/aspd and bpd is the ego reinforcing aspect, so i dont really care how maladjusted crab worshiping teens take it. they should go 'touch grass'.
>>268643
I have too much experience with people to ignore their common behaviors. I'm not trying to be le ironic psychopath here either. I have a huge disagreement with modern psychology and the general public's interpretation of their diagnosistic criterias. All these acronyms you used "npd, aspd, bpd" are so overused and perverted that they no longer have any meaning and integrity.
I have too much experience with people to ignore their common behaviors. I'm not trying to be le ironic psychopath here either. I have a huge disagreement with modern psychology and the general public's interpretation of their diagnosistic criterias. All these acronyms you used "npd, aspd, bpd" are so overused and perverted that they no longer have any meaning and integrity.
we all probly have trauma stuff easily. heres one ill choose tho,
when i was like 6 or 7 i was in a public bathroom for a football game or something at a high school, older kids came in and screamed at me, banged on the walls and doors, really freaked me out. also my pops died when i was 6 from terminal illness. my life is a silly sad one, silly boy i am.
when i was like 6 or 7 i was in a public bathroom for a football game or something at a high school, older kids came in and screamed at me, banged on the walls and doors, really freaked me out. also my pops died when i was 6 from terminal illness. my life is a silly sad one, silly boy i am.
>>268735
i have never been traumatized and i never will be. being traumatized is for bitches, children, homos and animals. not me, a man.
i have never been traumatized and i never will be. being traumatized is for bitches, children, homos and animals. not me, a man.
>>268738
I AM NOT FUCKING TRAUMATIZED YOU HOMO, I AM HEALTHY I AM STRONG I AM SAFE I AM SECURE THISNT ABOUT ME HOMO THIS IS ABOUT YOU
I AM NOT FUCKING TRAUMATIZED YOU HOMO, I AM HEALTHY I AM STRONG I AM SAFE I AM SECURE THISNT ABOUT ME HOMO THIS IS ABOUT YOU
>>268741
it's ok wizzie, this is a safe space. you can share your pain. who is the person you are truly angry at? stop blaming yourself for what happened.
it's ok wizzie, this is a safe space. you can share your pain. who is the person you are truly angry at? stop blaming yourself for what happened.
>>268809
they told you succubi will fall for you but in reality you're a wizzie completely irrelevant to them?
they told you succubi will fall for you but in reality you're a wizzie completely irrelevant to them?
>>268818
sorry I just assumed he's upset about succubi and decided I might tease him a bit
I didn't mean that it's bad to be a wizard, on the contrary
sorry I just assumed he's upset about succubi and decided I might tease him a bit
I didn't mean that it's bad to be a wizard, on the contrary
Getting bullied at school was pretty bad.
>had cigs put out on me
>chocked out in the hallway
>lighters put out on me (smilies)
>holes burnt in my clothes and hair
>had my things stolen etc
Such is life in the public education sector. I only blame my retarded dad for teaching me to never stand up to his and (and as a result) others bullying.
>had cigs put out on me
>chocked out in the hallway
>lighters put out on me (smilies)
>holes burnt in my clothes and hair
>had my things stolen etc
Such is life in the public education sector. I only blame my retarded dad for teaching me to never stand up to his and (and as a result) others bullying.
nice try Kiwifarms
Anyway you can guess it's all a living Hell. It's usually the lack of a single good thing and the repeated reminders of humiliation to make sure nothing good is possible. I only found good things when it was far too late, and it was always in the direction of giving up on humanity and the idea that they were going to be anything different. The sad thing is that humanity doesn't want even a small iota of improvement in any tangible way, because they're given over completely to the cult of power and have no real reason to concern themselves with the material world beyond the barest minimum they need. The worse conditions get, the more they value society. Making people suffer is the point, and it's just gross that so many enable it without getting a single thing from it, not even the benefit of seeing others suffer. It's just stuff they do by instinct, as they have been trained, only intelligently enough to ensure that they can keep making people miserable. That's why the insults just because, the total unwillingness to allow for a single nice thing to exist, starving people and taking away basic things while feeding society toxic waste and drugs, refusing even basic conditions once considered human staples. All of this and those who are safe and rule can't claim to be anything but perverts. I've seen these people and their ugly faces and all they do is bray about how they're the chosen. Anyone who actually does things is exploited or kicked around and used up. It's just an orgy and they don't want it to ever stop or face any pushback. They're horrified at the thought that someone is disgusted with their party train and all the effects. You would only do any of the stuff this society does if you set out to kill as many people as possible over a century.
Anyway you can guess it's all a living Hell. It's usually the lack of a single good thing and the repeated reminders of humiliation to make sure nothing good is possible. I only found good things when it was far too late, and it was always in the direction of giving up on humanity and the idea that they were going to be anything different. The sad thing is that humanity doesn't want even a small iota of improvement in any tangible way, because they're given over completely to the cult of power and have no real reason to concern themselves with the material world beyond the barest minimum they need. The worse conditions get, the more they value society. Making people suffer is the point, and it's just gross that so many enable it without getting a single thing from it, not even the benefit of seeing others suffer. It's just stuff they do by instinct, as they have been trained, only intelligently enough to ensure that they can keep making people miserable. That's why the insults just because, the total unwillingness to allow for a single nice thing to exist, starving people and taking away basic things while feeding society toxic waste and drugs, refusing even basic conditions once considered human staples. All of this and those who are safe and rule can't claim to be anything but perverts. I've seen these people and their ugly faces and all they do is bray about how they're the chosen. Anyone who actually does things is exploited or kicked around and used up. It's just an orgy and they don't want it to ever stop or face any pushback. They're horrified at the thought that someone is disgusted with their party train and all the effects. You would only do any of the stuff this society does if you set out to kill as many people as possible over a century.
>>269523
Regardless of your dad been a piece of shit for not helping you in any way when you needed him the most, you should not be supposed to fight criminals on your own. That is why we have a state instead of anarchy.
Having to defend yourself from bullies torturing you with cigarette burns is like saying to a succubus that she should fight off her rapists on their own or deal with it or any person that they should fight robbers and murderers on their own. If you'll said a think like that, you'll get crucified.
My dad tried. He talked to the teachers, the parents, intimidated the bullies and nothing worked. Finally, he just had to change me to another school and send me to learn martial arts to "gain confidence and defend my self". By that time, the damage was done. I never recovered from that.
The funniest part is that years later I got into trouble for fighting in the new school … There is no winning if the authorities are pieces of shit that allow criminals to get away with it.
Regardless of your dad been a piece of shit for not helping you in any way when you needed him the most, you should not be supposed to fight criminals on your own. That is why we have a state instead of anarchy.
Having to defend yourself from bullies torturing you with cigarette burns is like saying to a succubus that she should fight off her rapists on their own or deal with it or any person that they should fight robbers and murderers on their own. If you'll said a think like that, you'll get crucified.
My dad tried. He talked to the teachers, the parents, intimidated the bullies and nothing worked. Finally, he just had to change me to another school and send me to learn martial arts to "gain confidence and defend my self". By that time, the damage was done. I never recovered from that.
The funniest part is that years later I got into trouble for fighting in the new school … There is no winning if the authorities are pieces of shit that allow criminals to get away with it.
>>269574
The same fuckery that's happening with schools is happening in society at large now where I live. We have gangs going into shops and slicing the fingers off of shopkeepers, and the cops go on the news and tell people not to defend themselves, and say "it would be a shame if a shopkeeper decided to use a weapon and found himself being the one charged with a crime".
It seems society is really selective at putting pressure on those who are agreeable and follow the rules while being lax on the more egregious elements that just cause harm. It's a strange form of abuse and it's going to lead to a lot of people snapping in the future.
The same fuckery that's happening with schools is happening in society at large now where I live. We have gangs going into shops and slicing the fingers off of shopkeepers, and the cops go on the news and tell people not to defend themselves, and say "it would be a shame if a shopkeeper decided to use a weapon and found himself being the one charged with a crime".
It seems society is really selective at putting pressure on those who are agreeable and follow the rules while being lax on the more egregious elements that just cause harm. It's a strange form of abuse and it's going to lead to a lot of people snapping in the future.
Here is a wisdom for you wizzies :
If the bully is good looking, he will get away with it.
If the victim is ugly, he will be punished for defending himself.
Humans tend to project positive trait on those with attractive features, whereas negative traits are projected on the less endowed counterparts.
If the bully is good looking, he will get away with it.
If the victim is ugly, he will be punished for defending himself.
Humans tend to project positive trait on those with attractive features, whereas negative traits are projected on the less endowed counterparts.
>>269585
almost always. sometimes there are sane people who defend whoever is victim, without this prejudice bullshit
also parents. if bullies' parents are influential (by means of personal acquaintance with somebody or some similar shit) you're almost certainly undone. idk what to do either cope, run or shoot them
almost always. sometimes there are sane people who defend whoever is victim, without this prejudice bullshit
also parents. if bullies' parents are influential (by means of personal acquaintance with somebody or some similar shit) you're almost certainly undone. idk what to do either cope, run or shoot them
>>269585
This reminds me of that good looking guy who killed a mother and her child with his car last year and then had a shitload of succubi defend him on the internet just because of his looks. If you are attractive to succubi you can literally almost do anything from being a convicted rapist to killing succubi without being judged as much.
This reminds me of that good looking guy who killed a mother and her child with his car last year and then had a shitload of succubi defend him on the internet just because of his looks. If you are attractive to succubi you can literally almost do anything from being a convicted rapist to killing succubi without being judged as much.
I've got conscripted into the army and it was 6 months of pure hell, once the normans recognized me as an outsider their torture was relentless.
>barged into the room and started stabbing the mattress of my bunk bed with a knife while I was lying in it
>held a live drill to my head
>stole 50 bucks from me
>always paired up so that I had to be the punching bag of a sadistic 2 meter tall amateur bodybuilder (I'm a skinny manlet) during martial arts training
>snuck up behind me in the canteen and gave me a haircut with a knife, had to sit still as to not get any cuts
>shoved around and dragged out of the shower room for "taking too long"
>shove onto the floor and sat upon
>shoved me into a locker and locked me inside while filming the whole thing
Some highlights, of course I also was insulted the whole time.
I'm not only an incredibly passive person but also of slight frame so I knew that getting aggressive and confronting them would at best merit laughter and at worst getting beat up and dying after my head bounces onto the concrete. Therefor my only choice was not giving them the reaction they expected, so I tried my best to stay stoic and unfazed but that only invited them to try harder.
At the end of the 6 months I was starting to crack and had certain days were I decided I'd kill at least one of them. One day I carried a hammer concealed in my sleeve and was determined to swing at the skull of the next one that targets me. I stabbed one of them with a screwdriver after he started choking me from behind, I aimed for his throat but missed and got a bony part of the neck area instead. On another day I broke my silence and insulted the mother of one of the alpha normans while he was fucking with me, he was getting ready to beat me up but backed off when I pulled my knife with tears running down my face. After that I was known as "psycho" or "school shooter".
If I saw one of them somewhere outside I'd probably freeze up and then try to get away before they recognize me. Due to spending more or less 6 months in a constant state of stress and fight and flight I can't pee when people are around (just hearing steps or voices is enough to trigger it) due to my urinary sphincter involuntarily clenching and I often also have trouble swallowing food which is something that started in the army canteen and never went away. The food somehow ends up stuck somewhere, then a stabbing pain begins and I feel as if I'm suffocating, this goes for for 3-20 minutes after which the food is regurgitated in a thick coat of saliva.
Atleast the normans had their cruel fun.
>barged into the room and started stabbing the mattress of my bunk bed with a knife while I was lying in it
>held a live drill to my head
>stole 50 bucks from me
>always paired up so that I had to be the punching bag of a sadistic 2 meter tall amateur bodybuilder (I'm a skinny manlet) during martial arts training
>snuck up behind me in the canteen and gave me a haircut with a knife, had to sit still as to not get any cuts
>shoved around and dragged out of the shower room for "taking too long"
>shove onto the floor and sat upon
>shoved me into a locker and locked me inside while filming the whole thing
Some highlights, of course I also was insulted the whole time.
I'm not only an incredibly passive person but also of slight frame so I knew that getting aggressive and confronting them would at best merit laughter and at worst getting beat up and dying after my head bounces onto the concrete. Therefor my only choice was not giving them the reaction they expected, so I tried my best to stay stoic and unfazed but that only invited them to try harder.
At the end of the 6 months I was starting to crack and had certain days were I decided I'd kill at least one of them. One day I carried a hammer concealed in my sleeve and was determined to swing at the skull of the next one that targets me. I stabbed one of them with a screwdriver after he started choking me from behind, I aimed for his throat but missed and got a bony part of the neck area instead. On another day I broke my silence and insulted the mother of one of the alpha normans while he was fucking with me, he was getting ready to beat me up but backed off when I pulled my knife with tears running down my face. After that I was known as "psycho" or "school shooter".
If I saw one of them somewhere outside I'd probably freeze up and then try to get away before they recognize me. Due to spending more or less 6 months in a constant state of stress and fight and flight I can't pee when people are around (just hearing steps or voices is enough to trigger it) due to my urinary sphincter involuntarily clenching and I often also have trouble swallowing food which is something that started in the army canteen and never went away. The food somehow ends up stuck somewhere, then a stabbing pain begins and I feel as if I'm suffocating, this goes for for 3-20 minutes after which the food is regurgitated in a thick coat of saliva.
Atleast the normans had their cruel fun.
>>269580
What you describe happened in New Zealand recently, are you from here? Also, I've come across the term anarcho-tyranny to describe the form of abuse that you mention.
What you describe happened in New Zealand recently, are you from here? Also, I've come across the term anarcho-tyranny to describe the form of abuse that you mention.
>>269834
What country is this? I'm assuming Russia. Why didn't you just shoot them when armed?
What country is this? I'm assuming Russia. Why didn't you just shoot them when armed?
>>269871 He would end up in the military jail and face more consequences later in his life. The justice system is always in favour of the rich and Alphas.
>>269869
Kek yeah, I'm describing New Zealand. It's strange how the rest of the developed world has no idea that we've got Mexican levels of crime here, and soon to be Mexican levels of violent/gang crime. There's exponential growth with the gangs, something like 13% a year, they're doubling in size every 6-7 years. We're about 3-4 years away from the gangs outnumbering the NZ military, and that's counting the desk jockeys and females in the army. Just for some historical perspective, the German army report on the Brownshirts and Antifa outnumbering the Weimar German army is what drove the German government to inaction. After a certain threshold the government just shits its pants and does nothing.
There doesn't seem to be any social or political will to do what the US did from the Reagan era onward, to just build more prisons and clamp down on crime. We pretty much have a set quota of people the government wants to have in prison to make their stats look good, and if they go over that they just start releasing people on "good behavior" or giving lenient sentences. You have literal murderers walking the street after 4 years kek.
Kek yeah, I'm describing New Zealand. It's strange how the rest of the developed world has no idea that we've got Mexican levels of crime here, and soon to be Mexican levels of violent/gang crime. There's exponential growth with the gangs, something like 13% a year, they're doubling in size every 6-7 years. We're about 3-4 years away from the gangs outnumbering the NZ military, and that's counting the desk jockeys and females in the army. Just for some historical perspective, the German army report on the Brownshirts and Antifa outnumbering the Weimar German army is what drove the German government to inaction. After a certain threshold the government just shits its pants and does nothing.
There doesn't seem to be any social or political will to do what the US did from the Reagan era onward, to just build more prisons and clamp down on crime. We pretty much have a set quota of people the government wants to have in prison to make their stats look good, and if they go over that they just start releasing people on "good behavior" or giving lenient sentences. You have literal murderers walking the street after 4 years kek.
>>269834
>After that I was known as "psycho" or "school shooter".
Sometimes a part of me thinks that the Freudian death drive makes people try to drive people into snapping and killing them. On some level people like this want shootings to happen and put a great deal of effort into making them happen. There’s a video of some old married couple harassing a young widowed guy into snapping and killing them. Even when they’ve been shot and are dying, they are still talking shit to him. It’s some kind of brain rot. Some form/aspect of antisocial personality. Shootings happen more in the US because of the higher incidence of whatever personality type this is. It seems really common in anglos, but also from what I’ve heard Brazilians — not saying it’s racial. American culture really encourages it, especially in young people.
>After that I was known as "psycho" or "school shooter".
Sometimes a part of me thinks that the Freudian death drive makes people try to drive people into snapping and killing them. On some level people like this want shootings to happen and put a great deal of effort into making them happen. There’s a video of some old married couple harassing a young widowed guy into snapping and killing them. Even when they’ve been shot and are dying, they are still talking shit to him. It’s some kind of brain rot. Some form/aspect of antisocial personality. Shootings happen more in the US because of the higher incidence of whatever personality type this is. It seems really common in anglos, but also from what I’ve heard Brazilians — not saying it’s racial. American culture really encourages it, especially in young people.
>>269875
There's so many morons who have never set foot here, yet think that New Zealand is some kind of paradise. The wages are shit, the cost of living (particularly rent) is absurd, building standards and quality are abysmal, and our current government literally thinks that it is racist to crack down on gangs.
There's so many morons who have never set foot here, yet think that New Zealand is some kind of paradise. The wages are shit, the cost of living (particularly rent) is absurd, building standards and quality are abysmal, and our current government literally thinks that it is racist to crack down on gangs.
>>269882
My father threatened murder suicide with my brothers and I during his depression episodes until he was put away. It's in the blood this depression.
My father threatened murder suicide with my brothers and I during his depression episodes until he was put away. It's in the blood this depression.
Kicked and beaten into a corner, meths splashed on me and set on fire by step father. Mother didn't care much.
And that's not even the start of it
And that's not even the start of it
Many, but mostly related to the shouting and the arguments, but I learned to cope more or less. But once when I was young I began to be very afraid of death, and the void, but it went away after a few months, but I had never felt so bad before. I really hope this feeling doesn't come back.
>>270928
I've never had a traumatic experience but I'll give you something you'll probably find interesting:
>be 7 years old
>father is a tranny
>he regularly threatens to remove the genitals of his children
>beats us etc
>when I get older (10) he starts going off about how I'm turning rebellious now that I'm "developing"
>one time I talk back to him
>he goes on a tangent about how I'm a boy that needs to be "broken in"
>knocks my head, chokes me, etc, never anything too bad
>luckily never beaten
>one time I'm secretly reading a book at night
>he tears my blankets off and chokes me
>i don't want to lose to him, so I keep a smile on and stare at him
>he looks visibly unsettled and walks away
Some days after that police removed me from him. Here's an unrelated story:
>now 11 years old
>really shy around step-father
>he seems pretty nice though
>i start getting comfortable and even happy that I have a "dad" now
>fantasize about having a real dad
>one day I leave my blanket on the floor while cleaning (i slept on the floor)
>he suddenly begins screaming at me and, although I was used to holding back tears from my biological father this took me by surprise, so I couldn't really control it
>we get on very bad terms
>never build a relationship with him again
I've never had a traumatic experience but I'll give you something you'll probably find interesting:
>be 7 years old
>father is a tranny
>he regularly threatens to remove the genitals of his children
>beats us etc
>when I get older (10) he starts going off about how I'm turning rebellious now that I'm "developing"
>one time I talk back to him
>he goes on a tangent about how I'm a boy that needs to be "broken in"
>knocks my head, chokes me, etc, never anything too bad
>luckily never beaten
>one time I'm secretly reading a book at night
>he tears my blankets off and chokes me
>i don't want to lose to him, so I keep a smile on and stare at him
>he looks visibly unsettled and walks away
Some days after that police removed me from him. Here's an unrelated story:
>now 11 years old
>really shy around step-father
>he seems pretty nice though
>i start getting comfortable and even happy that I have a "dad" now
>fantasize about having a real dad
>one day I leave my blanket on the floor while cleaning (i slept on the floor)
>he suddenly begins screaming at me and, although I was used to holding back tears from my biological father this took me by surprise, so I couldn't really control it
>we get on very bad terms
>never build a relationship with him again
i witnessed my mom being verbally and sometimes phisically abused by my alcoholic uncle. it didn't help that my mom was an alcoholic too and she would provoke the fat fuck meanwhile i was completely powerless. all of this happened while we all lived in my hoarder grandma's house. this happened for most of my teenage years and just about 2 years ago after graduating high school me and my mom managed to move. this left me with very specific triggers for anxiety attacks like hearing distant loud shouting or sudden powerful noises
>mom takes me on a trip to someplace, don't really care because I'm a child and as long as I can bring my DS to play on I'm happy
>eventually arrive at some person's nice house, and it's an older african man with a thick accent
>they both leave me in the living room and head to a bedroom
>look around his home and see pictures of his wife and children who look like they're in someplace in africa
>stomach drops as I suddenly realize what's going on and stay quiet until I can go home and tell my dad what happened
>parents are constantly in screaming matches, their alcohol usage increases exponentially which exacerbates the screaming and fights
>at some point my mom secretly sold my DS and other things, like previous birthday gifts for probably more alcohol
>this happens for years afterwards still and I'll sometimes catch a glimpse of my mom's phone and see dirty texts to multiple people
>mom even asks me to take nudes for her which I vehemently declined but the fact she asked me to even do that made me sick to my stomach
>parents are trailer park trash and aren't even married but are financially bound to each other so tensions worsen as they're stuck living with each other
>years later my dad commits suicide and my mom's cognitive state has declined significantly due to alcohol, and begs me for money
On top of all this I constantly wonder if I have FASD due to my mom's dependence on alcohol. I've asked her before but she will lie no matter what, so I guess I'll never know. I don't have the features, but I'm severely autistic so I question if that's FASD rather than autism.
>eventually arrive at some person's nice house, and it's an older african man with a thick accent
>they both leave me in the living room and head to a bedroom
>look around his home and see pictures of his wife and children who look like they're in someplace in africa
>stomach drops as I suddenly realize what's going on and stay quiet until I can go home and tell my dad what happened
>parents are constantly in screaming matches, their alcohol usage increases exponentially which exacerbates the screaming and fights
>at some point my mom secretly sold my DS and other things, like previous birthday gifts for probably more alcohol
>this happens for years afterwards still and I'll sometimes catch a glimpse of my mom's phone and see dirty texts to multiple people
>mom even asks me to take nudes for her which I vehemently declined but the fact she asked me to even do that made me sick to my stomach
>parents are trailer park trash and aren't even married but are financially bound to each other so tensions worsen as they're stuck living with each other
>years later my dad commits suicide and my mom's cognitive state has declined significantly due to alcohol, and begs me for money
On top of all this I constantly wonder if I have FASD due to my mom's dependence on alcohol. I've asked her before but she will lie no matter what, so I guess I'll never know. I don't have the features, but I'm severely autistic so I question if that's FASD rather than autism.
this OP absolutely reeks of some fat landwhale slut from kiwi or cc trying to harvest our pain like the low level demon bitch creature she is
>>271617
I thought the same, never trust a faggot who opens threads like these without providing anything himself. There were at least 4-5 threads like these in the last few weeks and I suspect its all from the same person. This faggot literally just opens threads with one question and then people share their whole life even though OP wont post anything about his own shortcomings.
Its either a troll or some other faggot who tries to harvest stories for some shit.
I thought the same, never trust a faggot who opens threads like these without providing anything himself. There were at least 4-5 threads like these in the last few weeks and I suspect its all from the same person. This faggot literally just opens threads with one question and then people share their whole life even though OP wont post anything about his own shortcomings.
Its either a troll or some other faggot who tries to harvest stories for some shit.
>>267760
When I was a kid a couple of other kids in the neighborhood thought it'd be pretty funny to hang me with an old rope they found. I survived and I've been a loner ever since.
When I was a kid a couple of other kids in the neighborhood thought it'd be pretty funny to hang me with an old rope they found. I survived and I've been a loner ever since.
>>271683
You expect us to believe some kids tried to lynch you. Nobodies buying your made up shit. Your life isn't a movie.
And i have posted a traumatic memory here in this thread.
You expect us to believe some kids tried to lynch you. Nobodies buying your made up shit. Your life isn't a movie.
And i have posted a traumatic memory here in this thread.
>>271684
Typical white boy doesn't want to believe BIPOC when they express their traumatic memories of past lynching attempts. Yes, this is reality for minorities in Amerikkka
Typical white boy doesn't want to believe BIPOC when they express their traumatic memories of past lynching attempts. Yes, this is reality for minorities in Amerikkka
>>271689
toxic is the perfect word to describe ppl who talk trash to people who dont hurt nobody
toxic is the perfect word to describe ppl who talk trash to people who dont hurt nobody
>>271690
>ppl
Just more evidence of you being a dosgraceful, gullible newcunt tourist. I hate you with every fiber of my being.
>ppl
Just more evidence of you being a dosgraceful, gullible newcunt tourist. I hate you with every fiber of my being.
Delirium when I was in the ICU last year, they put me on so many drugs I was utterly out of my mind.
>>269580
This reminds me of an article I read from somewhere in rural Canada about some men who pursued thieves by car so they didn't get away again and the thieves were shooting at them.
When they called the police to tell them what was happening and ask for urgent assistance, the police officer's most emphasized point was that they should not shoot back or they would be ARRESTED.
Wish I could find the article.
It's all so demoralizing I just try not to think about it.
It's obviously much easier to penalize people who law-abiding and decent and simply defending themselves.
This reminds me of an article I read from somewhere in rural Canada about some men who pursued thieves by car so they didn't get away again and the thieves were shooting at them.
When they called the police to tell them what was happening and ask for urgent assistance, the police officer's most emphasized point was that they should not shoot back or they would be ARRESTED.
Wish I could find the article.
It's all so demoralizing I just try not to think about it.
It's obviously much easier to penalize people who law-abiding and decent and simply defending themselves.
>>269585
Yes, it's status based. If the aggressor has more status than the victim he can get away with it or get a lighter punishment.
Good looks is a form of status, money and a powerful family are other.
People are apes. If you look at chimps, high status chimps always bully low status chimps to show who is on top and who is on the bottom. Humans are no better.
Yes, it's status based. If the aggressor has more status than the victim he can get away with it or get a lighter punishment.
Good looks is a form of status, money and a powerful family are other.
People are apes. If you look at chimps, high status chimps always bully low status chimps to show who is on top and who is on the bottom. Humans are no better.
>>271830
It’s kind of weird how misanthropy based on humans just being apes is mocked these days. People need to believe their political tribal abuse of each other online has meaning I guess. People are just apes and this conflict has no meaning, it’s just ape shit 🦧
It’s kind of weird how misanthropy based on humans just being apes is mocked these days. People need to believe their political tribal abuse of each other online has meaning I guess. People are just apes and this conflict has no meaning, it’s just ape shit 🦧
>>271830
>People are apes. If you look at chimps, high status chimps always bully low status chimps to show who is on top and who is on the bottom. Humans are no better.
Couldn't have said it better. It's sad how many people don't understand this.
>People are apes. If you look at chimps, high status chimps always bully low status chimps to show who is on top and who is on the bottom. Humans are no better.
Couldn't have said it better. It's sad how many people don't understand this.
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when I was 12 my mom and dad took me to one of their work friends house because they were having a party, I told my parents that I didn't want to go but they brought me anyway, when we got there I had a panic attack and started crying, then my dad drove me back home without my mom, screaming at me the whole 30~ mins back, when we got home he started viciously beating me up and throwing me into furniture and stuff, I got hurt really bad so I just curled in a ball on the floor and think I broke a rib and then he called me a pussy and left me there so he could sit on the couch and watch tv
>>271593
>very specific triggers for anxiety
don't have a very good vocabulary but is it similar to the symptoms of that succubus from midsommar or the father from aftersun?
>very specific triggers for anxiety
don't have a very good vocabulary but is it similar to the symptoms of that succubus from midsommar or the father from aftersun?
>>271841
Yea, but in humans is not exactly the same. Hierarchies here are more complex, they have tricks
Yea, but in humans is not exactly the same. Hierarchies here are more complex, they have tricks
>>271860
Thats some fucked up shit, really felt sickening to read. Im sorry you had to through something like that.
Thats some fucked up shit, really felt sickening to read. Im sorry you had to through something like that.
>>271860
My parents were similarly rage freaks. Though their threats never turned physical.
It made me passive to hide my injuries from assaults at school. One time I was already knocked down to the ground on my face. Then someone slammed my back some how. I couldn't see. It fucked up my spine really good. I don't know how because I hid it from everybody. The adrenaline kept me going for the day. When I got home at night the pain hit. It hurt so bad for so long. I hid a board and a small cushion for my lower back on my bed and slept laid up like that because I figured it would help me heal easier. Took maybe months before the pain subsided. I think it was maybe a herniated disc or something. It would explain why my lower body. Basically my legs. Are weak as fuck like partial paralysis or something. I have horrible coordination below the lumbar. Oh yeah and also the spasms. I didn't know it wasn't normal to have weak legs like this because it happened to me so young. I think first or second grade. I just assume its normal for human legs.
My parents were similarly rage freaks. Though their threats never turned physical.
It made me passive to hide my injuries from assaults at school. One time I was already knocked down to the ground on my face. Then someone slammed my back some how. I couldn't see. It fucked up my spine really good. I don't know how because I hid it from everybody. The adrenaline kept me going for the day. When I got home at night the pain hit. It hurt so bad for so long. I hid a board and a small cushion for my lower back on my bed and slept laid up like that because I figured it would help me heal easier. Took maybe months before the pain subsided. I think it was maybe a herniated disc or something. It would explain why my lower body. Basically my legs. Are weak as fuck like partial paralysis or something. I have horrible coordination below the lumbar. Oh yeah and also the spasms. I didn't know it wasn't normal to have weak legs like this because it happened to me so young. I think first or second grade. I just assume its normal for human legs.
My mother using some academic failure as leverage to pick pimples and boils on my back as she very clearly enjoyed/got off while doing so when I was 13. I messed up in school so she traded me lying on my stomach on a bed while she painfully picked at me and popped my black/whiteheads in exchange for not doing anything about low grades in parental retaliation. I genuinely felt physically coerced and violated and weird about the entire ordeal.
She's in the hospital now, a decade later, and nobody but my father gives a fuck. Both of my brothers and several family members have expressed mixtures of relief and happiness that she's nearing end of life. I share their feelings. I hope her death comes quickly and is moved past without too much fanfare. I can say with no doubt I hope she dies in the most efficient form possible so I can stop letting her take up space in my life, though the abuse we've suffered will surely affect multiple people for years to come. To put it as simply as possible, she should have been killed a long time ago. There was no gain whatsoever to anybody from her being around, only suffering compounded by more suffering. She's Livia Soprano in the flesh.
She's in the hospital now, a decade later, and nobody but my father gives a fuck. Both of my brothers and several family members have expressed mixtures of relief and happiness that she's nearing end of life. I share their feelings. I hope her death comes quickly and is moved past without too much fanfare. I can say with no doubt I hope she dies in the most efficient form possible so I can stop letting her take up space in my life, though the abuse we've suffered will surely affect multiple people for years to come. To put it as simply as possible, she should have been killed a long time ago. There was no gain whatsoever to anybody from her being around, only suffering compounded by more suffering. She's Livia Soprano in the flesh.
>>273571
>My mother using some academic failure as leverage to pick pimples and boils on my back as she very clearly enjoyed/got off while doing so when I was 13. I messed up in school so she traded me lying on my stomach on a bed while she painfully picked at me and popped my black/whiteheads in exchange for not doing anything about low grades in parental retaliation. I genuinely felt physically coerced and violated and weird about the entire ordeal.
This seems pretty innocent honestly…
>My mother using some academic failure as leverage to pick pimples and boils on my back as she very clearly enjoyed/got off while doing so when I was 13. I messed up in school so she traded me lying on my stomach on a bed while she painfully picked at me and popped my black/whiteheads in exchange for not doing anything about low grades in parental retaliation. I genuinely felt physically coerced and violated and weird about the entire ordeal.
This seems pretty innocent honestly…
>>273575
unlike that wizard my mom sucked my dick and forced me to shower with her until I was 14 and got moved away
unlike that wizard my mom sucked my dick and forced me to shower with her until I was 14 and got moved away
Has therapy ever helped any of you?
Theres a therapist who charges fairly cheap in my town, but I'm not sure if I should go or if it's just a waste of time and money.
Theres a therapist who charges fairly cheap in my town, but I'm not sure if I should go or if it's just a waste of time and money.
>>273605
You probably should go because it might work. It never worked for me though, but that's just me. A therapist is someone that's trained to be a helpful friend replacement, so if you ever feel like you want someone to talk to it might be beneficial.
Just don't lie to them, don't act like you know everything, don't argue, etc. Just be humble and talk about your problems.
You probably should go because it might work. It never worked for me though, but that's just me. A therapist is someone that's trained to be a helpful friend replacement, so if you ever feel like you want someone to talk to it might be beneficial.
Just don't lie to them, don't act like you know everything, don't argue, etc. Just be humble and talk about your problems.
you should see a therapist as a poker
poking into your feelies
you need to let them poke without assuming that they have some ulterior motive
if you feel like they got a wrong hunch then tell them
poking into your feelies
you need to let them poke without assuming that they have some ulterior motive
if you feel like they got a wrong hunch then tell them
> Be around 6 years old
> Mom takes me and baby brother to drug den
> See neighborhood get progressively shittier with bars on windows, broken cars, blacks and mexicans everywhere
> Mom leaves me and brother in crib and steps into side room to get high
> Survival instincts kick in "I need to get home"
> Too weak to carry baby brother in carseat
> Had to abandon baby brother at a drug den to save myself
> Walk home using landmarks, recognize road intersection near home
> No adults try to help wondering child
> Make it home and tell dad
> Baby Brother eventually returned home and parents have usual screaming match
> Childhood only get worse from there
> Mom takes me and baby brother to drug den
> See neighborhood get progressively shittier with bars on windows, broken cars, blacks and mexicans everywhere
> Mom leaves me and brother in crib and steps into side room to get high
> Survival instincts kick in "I need to get home"
> Too weak to carry baby brother in carseat
> Had to abandon baby brother at a drug den to save myself
> Walk home using landmarks, recognize road intersection near home
> No adults try to help wondering child
> Make it home and tell dad
> Baby Brother eventually returned home and parents have usual screaming match
> Childhood only get worse from there
> Be around 7 years old
> Baby Brother tries climbing up large wooden dresser
> It falls on top of him but he is saved by bed
> Dad storms into the room and punches the wind out of me
> Baby Brother tries climbing up large wooden dresser
> It falls on top of him but he is saved by bed
> Dad storms into the room and punches the wind out of me
> Be around 10 years old
> Ask mom for lunch money
> Mom is hung over and smashes her coffee mug on my head and sends me to school
> Walk to school with throbbing headache
> Get to school and find head is bleeding
> Tell teacher then mom is called
> Mom panics and takes me and baby brother away from dad to a new city to hide from authorities by living with family
> Relatives run several halfway home for recovering druggies and mentally disturbed
> Spend a few years living with constantly screaming people
> Get molested at one point and never tell anyone
> Dad made no effort to recover me
> Ask mom for lunch money
> Mom is hung over and smashes her coffee mug on my head and sends me to school
> Walk to school with throbbing headache
> Get to school and find head is bleeding
> Tell teacher then mom is called
> Mom panics and takes me and baby brother away from dad to a new city to hide from authorities by living with family
> Relatives run several halfway home for recovering druggies and mentally disturbed
> Spend a few years living with constantly screaming people
> Get molested at one point and never tell anyone
> Dad made no effort to recover me
> Be around 14 years old
> Mom is sick of me and brother and returns us home to dad
> On night Mom returns home high and tries to take me and brother away again
> Mom and dad get into fight
> Mom takes a bite out of dads nose
> Mom is taken away by police and life gets a bit better
> Mom is sick of me and brother and returns us home to dad
> On night Mom returns home high and tries to take me and brother away again
> Mom and dad get into fight
> Mom takes a bite out of dads nose
> Mom is taken away by police and life gets a bit better
> Be around 18 years old
> Get accepted into UC Berkeley with partial scholarship
> Need 100$ deposit for school housing
> Ask parents for money but they refused
> End up community college instead
> Doing well the first year until incident at home
> Dad overdosed on pain medication and had a stroke
> Find him and try cpr
> Get a mouthfull of his vomit
> He dies after me have failed giving him cpr
> Hear paramedics make a joke and laugh while stadnding over his dead body
> Brother rather spend the remainder of the night with his friends and not me
> Mom returns home, steals his car that was left for me, and loots the house
> Drop out of community college, still dont have any degree
Dieing was the best thing he has done for me. Cut mom off but still waiting to hear she is dead so I can be free.
> Get accepted into UC Berkeley with partial scholarship
> Need 100$ deposit for school housing
> Ask parents for money but they refused
> End up community college instead
> Doing well the first year until incident at home
> Dad overdosed on pain medication and had a stroke
> Find him and try cpr
> Get a mouthfull of his vomit
> He dies after me have failed giving him cpr
> Hear paramedics make a joke and laugh while stadnding over his dead body
> Brother rather spend the remainder of the night with his friends and not me
> Mom returns home, steals his car that was left for me, and loots the house
> Drop out of community college, still dont have any degree
Dieing was the best thing he has done for me. Cut mom off but still waiting to hear she is dead so I can be free.
First time poster long time wiz (conceptually).
My trauma story begins before I was born, when my brother was an only child.
>Parents get married
>Dad is from middle class family with abnormally healthy upbringing
>Mother is bastard child of a low income family of all boys except her
>She basically raised her younger (full) brother to the point where he basically sees her as his own mother
>My dad comes into the picture and carries her away to happy ever after
>All her brothers, younger included, continue to live mediocre low class lives and never get married or amount to anything (all 3 full brothers, and all two half brothers.)
>Younger brother breaks up with girlfriend because she aborted their child
>He's upset she moved on
>My dad speaks reason to him
>Younger brother (my uncle) commits suicide and the suicide note arrives on my parents wedding anniversary
>Note is allegedly unhinged and says nasty things that shouldn't be repeated
>My mom starts resenting my dad
End of prologue.
>Dad is a doctor, mom is a failed elementary teacher
>Don't know yet but she has bipolar disorder and explosive personality disorder
>She spent money like crazy chasing that high because of growing up poor and being bipolar
>Mom is physically and emotionally abusive with hoarding tendencies
>Dad is routinely physically abused by mom who throws drinks and silverware at my dad
>She routinely scratched his skin and would leave deep marks on him
>Dad works long hours to pay bills to get home and do laundry, cook, and clean.
>Mom tells her friends from college that she is being physically abused by her husband (not true)
>Gets her friend to call Police on my dad for her
>Dad is arrested and kicked out of the house with restraining order
>Begins the start of diminished employment for my father because of her false testimony
>Mom drops charges
>Dad comes back
>Idk how many years later Mom is throwing things at my dad and scaring me so I threaten to call the police on her
>Stupid me pressed 911 thinking I would threaten to press dial but the call goes through anyways
>Dispatch now talking to me
>Police arrive
>Spill my 8 year old heart to police about how the police are sexist because they assume my dad is at fault
>say that my dad has to leave (even though it was my mom who is the abuser)
>My testimony is why they released him instead of locking him up that night
>This time she files for divorce and plays everyone's sympathies in Court
>Mother has been messaging another doctor half way across the country to live with him
>She has a plan to fly away to him
>delusional because she also has three kids she also wants custody of
>All of her negative traits prevent her from effectively carrying out her plan
>They don't get divorced because he agrees to get her a new minivan
>Older brother and I struggling with debilitating depression and schooling respectively
>Dad despite being the super dad that he is, scares me at times (type A personality) because he he is understandably frustrated with his wife
>Super dad homeschooled me for a year while I catch up to my peers in reading and math
>He taught me to love math and books
>Starts her slow decline in cognition over the course of 3 decades
>Despite her terrorizing our family I still love her
>She is still the most tragic case I can think of worse than my brothers or I
>She is diagnosed with a heart disease caused by genetic blood disease
>Enter the medical years of concern for her health and longevity
>Her admittance to the psych ward on thee occasions because of her manic phases
>Older brother who cracked in highschool has three suicide attempts under his belt by this point two of which I prevented, one an overdose and the other a firearm purchase I confiscated
>Mom in her craziness saves his life by doing a crazy U turn on the inner state highway at night after he jumps out of her car into oncoming traffic on the highway
>His military surplus parka saves him from any scratches of the pavement
>He gets admitted voluntary
>Ward doesn't even believe the miracle that is his survival that time
>Fast forward to now and I have learned to adapt to crushing pressure of my crazy family life
>Have helped my mom through her psych episodes, her diabetes and sepsis hospital visits
>Have helped dad through leg injury and heart surgery
>Parents are still together but my brothers and I are still living with them to keep them alive and healthy as we ourselves are incapable of living on our own
>Older brother has proven genetic link to moms psychology
>I'm the most capable and stable
>Younger brother is smartest of us, but a social dunce
>I avoided other people to save myself the embarrassment of my mother, mostly because of her hoarding
>The master bedroom for as long as I can remember has been filled with clothes and mail and newspapers since I was a small child despite my father emptying it on several occasions.
>We can no longer hold back her tide and the whole house has nearly been filled with her junk
>She is the most convincing argument for demons as she has the energy of ten men when it comes to protecting her trash and she can't look me in the eyes when she's angry, instead she looks past me up and to the right (it creeps me out)
>For those reasons I am a wizard along with my brothers
>My younger and I don't even have the desire to seek out succubi while my older is morbidly obese now and delusional about finding a wife one day.
I'm afraid to form attachments knowing what could be waiting for me out there, knowing that any succubus worth dating should run from me and my family and also because I'm struggling with the fact that my parents probably won't live much longer and I can't yet support myself.
How is anyone supposed to live as my father's parents did that made his family so stable as to allow him to achieve his goals of going to medical school?
I just want a second chance at life in a family that is functional, though I have always had the love of my father who is my hero to this day.
My trauma story begins before I was born, when my brother was an only child.
>Parents get married
>Dad is from middle class family with abnormally healthy upbringing
>Mother is bastard child of a low income family of all boys except her
>She basically raised her younger (full) brother to the point where he basically sees her as his own mother
>My dad comes into the picture and carries her away to happy ever after
>All her brothers, younger included, continue to live mediocre low class lives and never get married or amount to anything (all 3 full brothers, and all two half brothers.)
>Younger brother breaks up with girlfriend because she aborted their child
>He's upset she moved on
>My dad speaks reason to him
>Younger brother (my uncle) commits suicide and the suicide note arrives on my parents wedding anniversary
>Note is allegedly unhinged and says nasty things that shouldn't be repeated
>My mom starts resenting my dad
End of prologue.
>Dad is a doctor, mom is a failed elementary teacher
>Don't know yet but she has bipolar disorder and explosive personality disorder
>She spent money like crazy chasing that high because of growing up poor and being bipolar
>Mom is physically and emotionally abusive with hoarding tendencies
>Dad is routinely physically abused by mom who throws drinks and silverware at my dad
>She routinely scratched his skin and would leave deep marks on him
>Dad works long hours to pay bills to get home and do laundry, cook, and clean.
>Mom tells her friends from college that she is being physically abused by her husband (not true)
>Gets her friend to call Police on my dad for her
>Dad is arrested and kicked out of the house with restraining order
>Begins the start of diminished employment for my father because of her false testimony
>Mom drops charges
>Dad comes back
>Idk how many years later Mom is throwing things at my dad and scaring me so I threaten to call the police on her
>Stupid me pressed 911 thinking I would threaten to press dial but the call goes through anyways
>Dispatch now talking to me
>Police arrive
>Spill my 8 year old heart to police about how the police are sexist because they assume my dad is at fault
>say that my dad has to leave (even though it was my mom who is the abuser)
>My testimony is why they released him instead of locking him up that night
>This time she files for divorce and plays everyone's sympathies in Court
>Mother has been messaging another doctor half way across the country to live with him
>She has a plan to fly away to him
>delusional because she also has three kids she also wants custody of
>All of her negative traits prevent her from effectively carrying out her plan
>They don't get divorced because he agrees to get her a new minivan
>Older brother and I struggling with debilitating depression and schooling respectively
>Dad despite being the super dad that he is, scares me at times (type A personality) because he he is understandably frustrated with his wife
>Super dad homeschooled me for a year while I catch up to my peers in reading and math
>He taught me to love math and books
>Starts her slow decline in cognition over the course of 3 decades
>Despite her terrorizing our family I still love her
>She is still the most tragic case I can think of worse than my brothers or I
>She is diagnosed with a heart disease caused by genetic blood disease
>Enter the medical years of concern for her health and longevity
>Her admittance to the psych ward on thee occasions because of her manic phases
>Older brother who cracked in highschool has three suicide attempts under his belt by this point two of which I prevented, one an overdose and the other a firearm purchase I confiscated
>Mom in her craziness saves his life by doing a crazy U turn on the inner state highway at night after he jumps out of her car into oncoming traffic on the highway
>His military surplus parka saves him from any scratches of the pavement
>He gets admitted voluntary
>Ward doesn't even believe the miracle that is his survival that time
>Fast forward to now and I have learned to adapt to crushing pressure of my crazy family life
>Have helped my mom through her psych episodes, her diabetes and sepsis hospital visits
>Have helped dad through leg injury and heart surgery
>Parents are still together but my brothers and I are still living with them to keep them alive and healthy as we ourselves are incapable of living on our own
>Older brother has proven genetic link to moms psychology
>I'm the most capable and stable
>Younger brother is smartest of us, but a social dunce
>I avoided other people to save myself the embarrassment of my mother, mostly because of her hoarding
>The master bedroom for as long as I can remember has been filled with clothes and mail and newspapers since I was a small child despite my father emptying it on several occasions.
>We can no longer hold back her tide and the whole house has nearly been filled with her junk
>She is the most convincing argument for demons as she has the energy of ten men when it comes to protecting her trash and she can't look me in the eyes when she's angry, instead she looks past me up and to the right (it creeps me out)
>For those reasons I am a wizard along with my brothers
>My younger and I don't even have the desire to seek out succubi while my older is morbidly obese now and delusional about finding a wife one day.
I'm afraid to form attachments knowing what could be waiting for me out there, knowing that any succubus worth dating should run from me and my family and also because I'm struggling with the fact that my parents probably won't live much longer and I can't yet support myself.
How is anyone supposed to live as my father's parents did that made his family so stable as to allow him to achieve his goals of going to medical school?
I just want a second chance at life in a family that is functional, though I have always had the love of my father who is my hero to this day.
>>273870
This is why normies say don't stick your dick in crazy,she probably baby trapped him before revealing her crazy
This is why normies say don't stick your dick in crazy,she probably baby trapped him before revealing her crazy
>>273874
No, she wasn't didn't show any signs until after her brother committed suicide, her mother did though.
My dad was naive because he grew up in a healthy home. He was very idealistic and thought that people could overcome the results of their upbringing.
His mother was against it but not outwardly.
His mother respected his choices.
My dad tells me she said, don't bother giving to charity, because her family is going to fill that role in his life
Partially true, my dad paid on several occasions to keep her family and their home afloat.
Bought them a new heater, helped her pay bills sometimes.
Sad thing is, the house was left to her when her mother died, and my mother didn't trust my dad with it because he had taken money out of her account to pay her debts once. She still thinks he owes her that money but she's stopped bringing it up in the last 10 years.
Basically look at a succubus's mother and that's what she's likely to be when she's older.
My mother never did have her affair like her mother before her (she's the result of it).
But not for lack of trying.
It's crazy though that my mother has lived this long consider all her conditions. They all work against her to make management difficult.
If she has a blood sugar spike she goes manic and gets an infection, resulting in hallucinations, if she's in that state she can't keep track of her heart medications and starts having heart palpitations and retaining water, but we've always caught it before it has a chance to kill her.
She has now lost two of her toes to diabetes, and all her teeth.
I hate seeing her like this even though she is the source of all my pain.
I look back at pictures of her when she was in middle school and think how different her life could have been.
No, she wasn't didn't show any signs until after her brother committed suicide, her mother did though.
My dad was naive because he grew up in a healthy home. He was very idealistic and thought that people could overcome the results of their upbringing.
His mother was against it but not outwardly.
His mother respected his choices.
My dad tells me she said, don't bother giving to charity, because her family is going to fill that role in his life
Partially true, my dad paid on several occasions to keep her family and their home afloat.
Bought them a new heater, helped her pay bills sometimes.
Sad thing is, the house was left to her when her mother died, and my mother didn't trust my dad with it because he had taken money out of her account to pay her debts once. She still thinks he owes her that money but she's stopped bringing it up in the last 10 years.
Basically look at a succubus's mother and that's what she's likely to be when she's older.
My mother never did have her affair like her mother before her (she's the result of it).
But not for lack of trying.
It's crazy though that my mother has lived this long consider all her conditions. They all work against her to make management difficult.
If she has a blood sugar spike she goes manic and gets an infection, resulting in hallucinations, if she's in that state she can't keep track of her heart medications and starts having heart palpitations and retaining water, but we've always caught it before it has a chance to kill her.
She has now lost two of her toes to diabetes, and all her teeth.
I hate seeing her like this even though she is the source of all my pain.
I look back at pictures of her when she was in middle school and think how different her life could have been.
>>273874
Sorry I didn't address your full post.
No she didn't baby trap him.
My parents didn't get married or have sex until after he graduated from medical school.
My mom had often complained about how she wanted to have children when she was younger so she could've had a daughter.
I think the crazy only can live on through daughters.
My older brother who sends to have inherited that will likely never have children.
If I had a sister she probably would've continued the cycle.
It dies with him.
Again though, my parents were both virgins who were raised Christian and were married as virgins.
I know they aren't lying, they've told Mr or their past relationships and my mother can no longer keep secrets due to her mental state.
She has a sick enjoyment of making my dad uncomfortable by mentioning the sex they had recently in front of my brothers and I.
She would have long ago said something to the effect that she liked other men better if she had the experience.
She has told me of perverts she's encountered in her life and a middle school sleepover she walked home from because they wanted her to join in a sex game in the woods where the boys chased the succubi in pairs and when they caught them had their way,
Obviously not appealing to a virgin.
Anyways my oldest brother I think was conceived during my dad's residency.
Sorry I didn't address your full post.
No she didn't baby trap him.
My parents didn't get married or have sex until after he graduated from medical school.
My mom had often complained about how she wanted to have children when she was younger so she could've had a daughter.
I think the crazy only can live on through daughters.
My older brother who sends to have inherited that will likely never have children.
If I had a sister she probably would've continued the cycle.
It dies with him.
Again though, my parents were both virgins who were raised Christian and were married as virgins.
I know they aren't lying, they've told Mr or their past relationships and my mother can no longer keep secrets due to her mental state.
She has a sick enjoyment of making my dad uncomfortable by mentioning the sex they had recently in front of my brothers and I.
She would have long ago said something to the effect that she liked other men better if she had the experience.
She has told me of perverts she's encountered in her life and a middle school sleepover she walked home from because they wanted her to join in a sex game in the woods where the boys chased the succubi in pairs and when they caught them had their way,
Obviously not appealing to a virgin.
Anyways my oldest brother I think was conceived during my dad's residency.
Idk if it counts as traumatic exactly but it was the saddest moment in my life thus far and I'll always remember it.
In my sophomore year a very popular jock kid was killed in a car accident over the summer. I lived in a small town so everyone knew him and everyone went to the funeral. I wasn't exactly friends with him but I knew his father from my little league team and he was one of the nicer fathers who was always happy and proud of his star athlete kid. I had to watch him cry his eyes out as his son was lowered into the ground. I won't forget that scene.
In my sophomore year a very popular jock kid was killed in a car accident over the summer. I lived in a small town so everyone knew him and everyone went to the funeral. I wasn't exactly friends with him but I knew his father from my little league team and he was one of the nicer fathers who was always happy and proud of his star athlete kid. I had to watch him cry his eyes out as his son was lowered into the ground. I won't forget that scene.
>>267760
>Middle of the night.
>Hear LOUD mumbling in the middle of the night.
>Go out to kitchen.
>See my mother on the floor.
>Completely incoherent, but trying to flail around.
>Alcohol is fucking EVERYWHERE.
>Try to talk to her.
>Sort of recognizes me, sort of doesn't.
>Don't know what to do.
>Stay with her for a while.
>I see her reaching for a beer.
>In my child-brain I think, "Oh, she wants water."
>Get her to drink water. I remember it being very difficult given how she could barely hold her head up.
>After an hour and some more water she becomes coherent again.
>Yells at me in incredibly slurred that she wants to sleep.
>Try to drag her from kitchen floor, but she is too heavy.
>Bring out pillow and blankets to let her sleep on the kitchen floor.
I have lots of memories of my mother being a really, REALLY bad alcoholic, but that one was probably the worst (*). I legit thought she was going to die and thinking back I feel like I felt like I was going to watch my mother die in my hands. In retrospect, I was old enough to know to call for an ambulance, but I was too panic stricken in the moment to do that.
And then I have family ask me why I don't drink, why I don't have a gf, etc.. Like what the fuck did you expect I'd do growing up with that shit?
That's the most traumatic experience I remember. Probably the most traumatic experience I ever had was being hit in the head with a 7-iron. I know you guys are going to ask me for more details, but I have none: getting hit in the head with a 7-iron kind of makes you a little sketchy on any details.
I sometime think about the kids growing up in single mother fentanyl-addict homes. If I got fucked up by an alcoholic mother, I can only imagine how broken those folks are.
(*) The worst aspect is how regular an occurrence it was. Having to babysit a child that's actually far older and bigger than you while knowing that you can't really share any memories because the constant drinking puts them in a near-permanent state of anterograde amnesia.
I sometimes find myself looking up Muslim countries with no alcohol use and wondering how good/bad those countries really are to live in.
>Middle of the night.
>Hear LOUD mumbling in the middle of the night.
>Go out to kitchen.
>See my mother on the floor.
>Completely incoherent, but trying to flail around.
>Alcohol is fucking EVERYWHERE.
>Try to talk to her.
>Sort of recognizes me, sort of doesn't.
>Don't know what to do.
>Stay with her for a while.
>I see her reaching for a beer.
>In my child-brain I think, "Oh, she wants water."
>Get her to drink water. I remember it being very difficult given how she could barely hold her head up.
>After an hour and some more water she becomes coherent again.
>Yells at me in incredibly slurred that she wants to sleep.
>Try to drag her from kitchen floor, but she is too heavy.
>Bring out pillow and blankets to let her sleep on the kitchen floor.
I have lots of memories of my mother being a really, REALLY bad alcoholic, but that one was probably the worst (*). I legit thought she was going to die and thinking back I feel like I felt like I was going to watch my mother die in my hands. In retrospect, I was old enough to know to call for an ambulance, but I was too panic stricken in the moment to do that.
And then I have family ask me why I don't drink, why I don't have a gf, etc.. Like what the fuck did you expect I'd do growing up with that shit?
That's the most traumatic experience I remember. Probably the most traumatic experience I ever had was being hit in the head with a 7-iron. I know you guys are going to ask me for more details, but I have none: getting hit in the head with a 7-iron kind of makes you a little sketchy on any details.
I sometime think about the kids growing up in single mother fentanyl-addict homes. If I got fucked up by an alcoholic mother, I can only imagine how broken those folks are.
(*) The worst aspect is how regular an occurrence it was. Having to babysit a child that's actually far older and bigger than you while knowing that you can't really share any memories because the constant drinking puts them in a near-permanent state of anterograde amnesia.
I sometimes find myself looking up Muslim countries with no alcohol use and wondering how good/bad those countries really are to live in.
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I don't really have a big traumatic experience. For me it was more about my mother being a massive cunt, constantly threatening me with physical violence, yelling at me, using shame as a tool to manipulate me into doing whatever she wanted. Watching my brothers get pummeled by her didn't help either. All of this made me fearful and weak, I developed this compliant and submissive personality as a defensive mechanism just so she wouldn't beat my sorry ass. Fuck, what a massive cunt.
I guess all of that it's already pretty bad as it is, but if I had to pick a single experience that could be classified as traumatic that would had to be this sleepover I went when I was in elementary school. I was around 10 or 11 yo at the time and don't really remember all of the details, but I certainly remember how I felt and how things went over all.
>go to my friend's house for the sleepover
>he was alone that night, his parents went out a lot and let him do whatever he wanted pretty much
>cunt doesn't ask too many questions because friend lives really close to our house, like 2 blocks
>we were 4 or maybe 5 guys, I only remember clearly 3 of them, but there might have been a 4th guy
>night goes as you would expect, we played some vidya and stuff
>at some point they start watching porn
>I get really uncomfortable
>they sense that I wasn't into it
>they start harassing me, hitting me and calling me names
>the hitting wasn't too hard, not outright punches, but a lot of kick and flailing me around
>at one point I start crying
>try to hide in my sleeping bag
>they keep hitting me
>I go to another room while still inside of my sleeping bag to cry in peace
>they follow me and hit me some more
>don't remember what happens next. I might have fall asleep at some point
>the next day I go back home and never talk about this with anyone, though cunt might have reacted really badly because she was really jealous with her exclusive beating rights over her children
I think that day I learned that you couldn't trust anyone, be it family or friends. That was the day I finally realized how alone I was in this hostile and terrible world, with potential enemies waiting at every corner. I almost unlearned that when I made some cool friends in college, but since I was already too damaged from a lifetime of abuse I couldn't trust them and eventually lost them. The only thing I can hope for now is for this nightmare to end.
I guess all of that it's already pretty bad as it is, but if I had to pick a single experience that could be classified as traumatic that would had to be this sleepover I went when I was in elementary school. I was around 10 or 11 yo at the time and don't really remember all of the details, but I certainly remember how I felt and how things went over all.
>go to my friend's house for the sleepover
>he was alone that night, his parents went out a lot and let him do whatever he wanted pretty much
>cunt doesn't ask too many questions because friend lives really close to our house, like 2 blocks
>we were 4 or maybe 5 guys, I only remember clearly 3 of them, but there might have been a 4th guy
>night goes as you would expect, we played some vidya and stuff
>at some point they start watching porn
>I get really uncomfortable
>they sense that I wasn't into it
>they start harassing me, hitting me and calling me names
>the hitting wasn't too hard, not outright punches, but a lot of kick and flailing me around
>at one point I start crying
>try to hide in my sleeping bag
>they keep hitting me
>I go to another room while still inside of my sleeping bag to cry in peace
>they follow me and hit me some more
>don't remember what happens next. I might have fall asleep at some point
>the next day I go back home and never talk about this with anyone, though cunt might have reacted really badly because she was really jealous with her exclusive beating rights over her children
I think that day I learned that you couldn't trust anyone, be it family or friends. That was the day I finally realized how alone I was in this hostile and terrible world, with potential enemies waiting at every corner. I almost unlearned that when I made some cool friends in college, but since I was already too damaged from a lifetime of abuse I couldn't trust them and eventually lost them. The only thing I can hope for now is for this nightmare to end.
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>be born
>get circumcised immediately after
>autistic psychopath for life
>no cure of any kind will exist in my lifetime
Awesome!!!
>get circumcised immediately after
>autistic psychopath for life
>no cure of any kind will exist in my lifetime
Awesome!!!
I don't have any external trauma, just internal trauma for being a giant faggot who deserved what he got mostly.
The most I can ever manage is to allude to it. I’ve had horrific things done to me since I was a child. Basically every single kind of horrible thing that can be done to someone was done to me, physically and psychologically. I was treated like less than dirt, everything about me was exploited and harmed.
I watched people I loved die in my arms, screaming and covered in blood. It blindsides me, sometimes in the middle of the night, sometimes when I’m just walking down the street. It’s like my legs turn to jelly and everything fades away at the edges and I can feel them there in my hands again, their dying bodies. Life feels like a complete sick joke now. How am I supposed to be optimistic and do all this stupid fucking pretend shit day in and day out and pretend to care about shallow mundane pointless life after all that? I’m supposed to be placated by sunsets and new shows. I’m not. I’m a kid forced to stand out in the street naked in the snow, I’m holding a dying baby, I’m being dragged by my hair and hit in the head and spat on, in the back of my mind 24/7. My mother said she used to cry and wish I was never born. She’s right, I shouldn’t have been. There’s no reason any life should be like this, ever. People should get to be happy. Or even just okay. Even just safe.
I watched people I loved die in my arms, screaming and covered in blood. It blindsides me, sometimes in the middle of the night, sometimes when I’m just walking down the street. It’s like my legs turn to jelly and everything fades away at the edges and I can feel them there in my hands again, their dying bodies. Life feels like a complete sick joke now. How am I supposed to be optimistic and do all this stupid fucking pretend shit day in and day out and pretend to care about shallow mundane pointless life after all that? I’m supposed to be placated by sunsets and new shows. I’m not. I’m a kid forced to stand out in the street naked in the snow, I’m holding a dying baby, I’m being dragged by my hair and hit in the head and spat on, in the back of my mind 24/7. My mother said she used to cry and wish I was never born. She’s right, I shouldn’t have been. There’s no reason any life should be like this, ever. People should get to be happy. Or even just okay. Even just safe.
I remember 3 events around grade 3.
>My class was made to watch succubus give birth with a bunch of blood and "gore". No idea why. It was really out of the blue and strange from what I recall. Hard to know if there was any psychological effect, but I think so.
>A kid from a troubled household forced me and my friend to undress in bathroom at school. Thankfully nothing beyond that. Suspect it might've caused at least a moderate amount of psychological damage.
>Accidentally hurt my best friend. The damage was very minor, but there was a lot of blood. I remember it being incredibly stressful. It literally felt like I had committed murder, I was crying etc. I begged for forgiveness and for it to be kept secret. It was really exaggerated, I guess. Things really took a nosedive after that event. The friendship faded, I became introverted, had a sort of obsession with secrets after that for a good while.
Probably an event that really derailed my life, I suspect.
>My class was made to watch succubus give birth with a bunch of blood and "gore". No idea why. It was really out of the blue and strange from what I recall. Hard to know if there was any psychological effect, but I think so.
>A kid from a troubled household forced me and my friend to undress in bathroom at school. Thankfully nothing beyond that. Suspect it might've caused at least a moderate amount of psychological damage.
>Accidentally hurt my best friend. The damage was very minor, but there was a lot of blood. I remember it being incredibly stressful. It literally felt like I had committed murder, I was crying etc. I begged for forgiveness and for it to be kept secret. It was really exaggerated, I guess. Things really took a nosedive after that event. The friendship faded, I became introverted, had a sort of obsession with secrets after that for a good while.
Probably an event that really derailed my life, I suspect.
>>267760
I was banned from Reddit for making a post about killing children on R/Childfree.
The admins obviously are discriminatory against schizophrenics, since some of my other posts were about having schizophrenia….. They should have given me a warning, but instead permanently suspended my account for the phony reason "Violence."
What's wrong with advocating binding childrens' lips together with acid and then tearing a hole in their cheeks for food and water? Children should GROW THE FUCK UP ALREADY….. I'm sick of seeing screaming children in restaurants. LOBOTOMIZE them already, for Christs' sake. The Terrible Twos should be cured with violence…. Fuck Reddit and child lovers.
I was banned from Reddit for making a post about killing children on R/Childfree.
The admins obviously are discriminatory against schizophrenics, since some of my other posts were about having schizophrenia….. They should have given me a warning, but instead permanently suspended my account for the phony reason "Violence."
What's wrong with advocating binding childrens' lips together with acid and then tearing a hole in their cheeks for food and water? Children should GROW THE FUCK UP ALREADY….. I'm sick of seeing screaming children in restaurants. LOBOTOMIZE them already, for Christs' sake. The Terrible Twos should be cured with violence…. Fuck Reddit and child lovers.
>>274363
Growing up with an alcoholic mother eventually turned me into an alcoholic. Thankfully I won't have children and perpetuate the trauma, and will instead die alone and rot into the floor where I belong.
Growing up with an alcoholic mother eventually turned me into an alcoholic. Thankfully I won't have children and perpetuate the trauma, and will instead die alone and rot into the floor where I belong.
In my school, every class had a "watch week" where every member of the class had to stay in his/her assigned area and watch for older kids not to run in the hallways and stuff like that during every break time.
So it was our class turn. I was in 7th grade back then, 13 years old or so. I've been assigned to stay in the Eastern part of the 3rd floor, where 4th and 5th graders' classes were. Even though I was very diligent on my duty, kids were running and playing and doing shit, I only stopped and scolded the most violent ones.
And there was one succubus, who ran like crazy, playing catch and run or something with her classmates. I stopped her several times, showed her my duty badge and told not to run in the hallways. Each time she glared at me like she wanted to kill me.
So after all the lessons were over, no more shifts left, I was preparing to go home, when that succubus approached me and said her mom wanted to see me. I followed her to the exit, and this mom upon seeing me, started to shout at me, saying that I've beated up her daughter, and that she cried from all the bruises I inflicted on her. I said that I haven't touched her once and that I only said her not to run in the hallways, but she did not believe me, and slapped me several times in the face, that hurt really badly, but I didn't cry. She then threatened me that she would tell all the teachers and principal if i approach her daughter once again. All this time, by the way, her daughter was weeping, with a look like I raped her or something worse. I said okay to her mother and they left.
That was the story. I didn't say anyone anything what happened then. The only thing I did is that never again through any of my shifts I stopped or scolded anyone again.
So it was our class turn. I was in 7th grade back then, 13 years old or so. I've been assigned to stay in the Eastern part of the 3rd floor, where 4th and 5th graders' classes were. Even though I was very diligent on my duty, kids were running and playing and doing shit, I only stopped and scolded the most violent ones.
And there was one succubus, who ran like crazy, playing catch and run or something with her classmates. I stopped her several times, showed her my duty badge and told not to run in the hallways. Each time she glared at me like she wanted to kill me.
So after all the lessons were over, no more shifts left, I was preparing to go home, when that succubus approached me and said her mom wanted to see me. I followed her to the exit, and this mom upon seeing me, started to shout at me, saying that I've beated up her daughter, and that she cried from all the bruises I inflicted on her. I said that I haven't touched her once and that I only said her not to run in the hallways, but she did not believe me, and slapped me several times in the face, that hurt really badly, but I didn't cry. She then threatened me that she would tell all the teachers and principal if i approach her daughter once again. All this time, by the way, her daughter was weeping, with a look like I raped her or something worse. I said okay to her mother and they left.
That was the story. I didn't say anyone anything what happened then. The only thing I did is that never again through any of my shifts I stopped or scolded anyone again.
>>275094
What the fuck?
I guess some kind of psychopathy must run in the family.
Why didn't you tell anyone?
What the fuck?
I guess some kind of psychopathy must run in the family.
Why didn't you tell anyone?
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>>275094
Similar thing happened to me once. I was about 6 and watched my mom get yelled at by some junkie at school because apparently I had an altercation with her kid. I consider this unlikely, because I'm not very confrontational even back then and I don't remember having a problem with anyone. Anyway, I had to sit there and watch my mom just stare helplessly at this drug addict subhuman yell at her at the top of her lungs because that's what normal reasonable people do when their little shit hellspawn encounter a typical childhood confrontation.
Similar thing happened to me once. I was about 6 and watched my mom get yelled at by some junkie at school because apparently I had an altercation with her kid. I consider this unlikely, because I'm not very confrontational even back then and I don't remember having a problem with anyone. Anyway, I had to sit there and watch my mom just stare helplessly at this drug addict subhuman yell at her at the top of her lungs because that's what normal reasonable people do when their little shit hellspawn encounter a typical childhood confrontation.
>>275094
Funny, I once did the same thing as that little cunt. I used to skip the school a lot. Mom sent me to school in the morning but instead of going there I would go sit in the park daydreaming on a bench, or just randomly walking the streets until mom left to work so I could go back home. So one time I managed to skip through an entire week. Of course, my math teacher who was in charge of our class had noticed this and gave a call to my mom. That was the angriest i've ever seen her. My stupid ass was terrified, so I blurted that I am being bullied, insulted, humialiated by this one succubus and her friends, that is why I don't want to go there.
Of course, it was a lie. The succubus indeed was a fucking bitch and called me names, but I exaggerated the whole thing quite severely. Mom went to school on the next day and scolded the succubus so much she cried. Practically for no reason.
Had to switch schools, because I knew they'd bully me to death should I return.
God, I was such a retard. Sorry for lying to you, mom, rest in peace. Sorry for I did what I did to you too, O, though you were a cuntbag sometimes.
Funny, I once did the same thing as that little cunt. I used to skip the school a lot. Mom sent me to school in the morning but instead of going there I would go sit in the park daydreaming on a bench, or just randomly walking the streets until mom left to work so I could go back home. So one time I managed to skip through an entire week. Of course, my math teacher who was in charge of our class had noticed this and gave a call to my mom. That was the angriest i've ever seen her. My stupid ass was terrified, so I blurted that I am being bullied, insulted, humialiated by this one succubus and her friends, that is why I don't want to go there.
Of course, it was a lie. The succubus indeed was a fucking bitch and called me names, but I exaggerated the whole thing quite severely. Mom went to school on the next day and scolded the succubus so much she cried. Practically for no reason.
Had to switch schools, because I knew they'd bully me to death should I return.
God, I was such a retard. Sorry for lying to you, mom, rest in peace. Sorry for I did what I did to you too, O, though you were a cuntbag sometimes.
>>275094
>>275104
>>275119
>>275120
this is very common behavior for children to do, I've probably heard about similar situations to this 100 different times. It happens at an age where the child learns that they can manipulate their parents by lying but they've also not developed any kind of morals yet. I think the results of this eventually cause the child to feel negative emotions like regret and it teaches them about honesty or other similar virtues, although some psychos dont feel this and continue the behavior indefinitely
>>275104
>>275119
>>275120
this is very common behavior for children to do, I've probably heard about similar situations to this 100 different times. It happens at an age where the child learns that they can manipulate their parents by lying but they've also not developed any kind of morals yet. I think the results of this eventually cause the child to feel negative emotions like regret and it teaches them about honesty or other similar virtues, although some psychos dont feel this and continue the behavior indefinitely
>>275094
i would have taken that personal if someone dare to slap me when i didnt do jack shit.
i would have taken that personal if someone dare to slap me when i didnt do jack shit.
Someone <b>too</b> into scat posted their gifs on crystal.cafe when I was just peacefully scrolling there.
Usually before posting in a thread I read the every post, or if the thread is long, the bottom 20-50 response chains. But I'm not going to read any from this thread because it may trigger my post-traumatic stress, or enrage me at the injustices done to my fellow wizards.
I'll post a less horrific experience: My father, when trying to find out who did something, would ask the nearest one of us (me or one of my older brothers) if we did it, then the second nearest, the the third nearest, then the third nearest. If you denied it, he'd take your word for it unless you were the last one he asked. I don't know if I'm explaining it right, but this meant whoever was the farthest away from him when he found someone broke the rules would be the one to get punished; he would take the first three for their word when they pleaded innocent, but not the fourth and final of us.
I'll post a less horrific experience: My father, when trying to find out who did something, would ask the nearest one of us (me or one of my older brothers) if we did it, then the second nearest, the the third nearest, then the third nearest. If you denied it, he'd take your word for it unless you were the last one he asked. I don't know if I'm explaining it right, but this meant whoever was the farthest away from him when he found someone broke the rules would be the one to get punished; he would take the first three for their word when they pleaded innocent, but not the fourth and final of us.
>>275094
In high school, I've been on duty once with a badge that had a blue piece of paper with a position name on. One male student (same age, one year senior) were passing by. Instinctively, I took my badge from my pocket and put it on. Even if there were some smug connotations, they were short and non-deliberate. However, he took it away from me and ran away to the toilet. There, he was taking a piss and after my request he turned my way and pissed in my direction (open cabins without doors). I dodged. Other male person on duty was with me, laughing at the situation. The offender walked away. I said to the teacher that my badge got lost, got the another blue paper and gave upon teacher's request one badge to another person without it (for unknown reason). Good that I asked my mother to buy two although she complained why I handed it for free. Needless to say, the offender was a chad, athletically and study-wise superior. Complemented by one teacher as an example. Could've put it on the sink while leaving and it wouldn't hurt his status. But didn't.
In high school, I've been on duty once with a badge that had a blue piece of paper with a position name on. One male student (same age, one year senior) were passing by. Instinctively, I took my badge from my pocket and put it on. Even if there were some smug connotations, they were short and non-deliberate. However, he took it away from me and ran away to the toilet. There, he was taking a piss and after my request he turned my way and pissed in my direction (open cabins without doors). I dodged. Other male person on duty was with me, laughing at the situation. The offender walked away. I said to the teacher that my badge got lost, got the another blue paper and gave upon teacher's request one badge to another person without it (for unknown reason). Good that I asked my mother to buy two although she complained why I handed it for free. Needless to say, the offender was a chad, athletically and study-wise superior. Complemented by one teacher as an example. Could've put it on the sink while leaving and it wouldn't hurt his status. But didn't.
>>278054
The idea of wearing badges somehow was retired. Perhaps many lost it or found inconvenient.
Once on duty, someone was running and I was accused of the new curtains falling with a rod to the floor. Others said it wasn't me and the behaviour offender got scolded. My and his scolding was fierce and inadequate as curtains were light and the rod looked to be plastic and not sheer or anything. Upon reflection afterwards, it seems like me pressing on the wall with the curtain in between pulled it down. Just within a day, there were at least 3 such episodes and the new curtains were retired as putting them each time with a big ladder was troublesome.
The idea of wearing badges somehow was retired. Perhaps many lost it or found inconvenient.
Once on duty, someone was running and I was accused of the new curtains falling with a rod to the floor. Others said it wasn't me and the behaviour offender got scolded. My and his scolding was fierce and inadequate as curtains were light and the rod looked to be plastic and not sheer or anything. Upon reflection afterwards, it seems like me pressing on the wall with the curtain in between pulled it down. Just within a day, there were at least 3 such episodes and the new curtains were retired as putting them each time with a big ladder was troublesome.
>>269574
i've been 100% against public school from the very beginning. Nothing but prison-lite. Have you ever thought that some people just can't live together in peace and need to be separated? Public school makes them sit next to eachother day after day.
I never really got bullied in school, other than someone saying one or two things bad about me but it never got worse than that thankfully. I just fucking hate public school so much.
i've been 100% against public school from the very beginning. Nothing but prison-lite. Have you ever thought that some people just can't live together in peace and need to be separated? Public school makes them sit next to eachother day after day.
I never really got bullied in school, other than someone saying one or two things bad about me but it never got worse than that thankfully. I just fucking hate public school so much.
i am a shutin whos so neurotic i can barely function.
i was tormented by my brother my whole life, my mom killed herself and every day is just doom and gloom. I wouldn't choose to go back to any point in my life because its always sucked. my childhood sucked, my teenage years sucked. Theres only been like 2 month intervals where things quieted down and i got somewhat comfortable.
My life isn't as ass blastingly crazy as some people here but its just gloomy and sad, unjust, fucked up. worse in some ways than if i were just raped or something. though i've been beaten, belittled, tortured. because then something would give because it would be too much. Instead life just pushes my limits close to my breaking point then it settles down just enough to keep me sane. then it goes again and again and again as opposed to just one or two traumatic events. traumatic events provide excuses. i am deprived of excuses too other than being highly neurotic. I've become very cold, stoic, dead, its just godawful honestly. Even in an ideal scenerio i can't ever see myself having a better life. I am just incredibly bitter, spiteful because theres no other alternative. if i wasn't hardening myself like that i would have killed myself or went insane earlier on. In fact other than this post i don't even aknowledge just how shit my mental health is. Because its just a total lost cause. I'd never recover from how disturbing, mortifying and dreary my life has been. Theres no way i can ever frame myself in an exalted way. i've just been too humiliated. the only scary thing is that i'm still standing like none of it bothers me. I live out of spite. i live as though somehow its going to get better and i won't just rot as another cog in society, that i'll somehow salvage this and be the person i always wanted to be. whats sad about that its not happening. that ship has long sailed but i can't let go.
i was tormented by my brother my whole life, my mom killed herself and every day is just doom and gloom. I wouldn't choose to go back to any point in my life because its always sucked. my childhood sucked, my teenage years sucked. Theres only been like 2 month intervals where things quieted down and i got somewhat comfortable.
My life isn't as ass blastingly crazy as some people here but its just gloomy and sad, unjust, fucked up. worse in some ways than if i were just raped or something. though i've been beaten, belittled, tortured. because then something would give because it would be too much. Instead life just pushes my limits close to my breaking point then it settles down just enough to keep me sane. then it goes again and again and again as opposed to just one or two traumatic events. traumatic events provide excuses. i am deprived of excuses too other than being highly neurotic. I've become very cold, stoic, dead, its just godawful honestly. Even in an ideal scenerio i can't ever see myself having a better life. I am just incredibly bitter, spiteful because theres no other alternative. if i wasn't hardening myself like that i would have killed myself or went insane earlier on. In fact other than this post i don't even aknowledge just how shit my mental health is. Because its just a total lost cause. I'd never recover from how disturbing, mortifying and dreary my life has been. Theres no way i can ever frame myself in an exalted way. i've just been too humiliated. the only scary thing is that i'm still standing like none of it bothers me. I live out of spite. i live as though somehow its going to get better and i won't just rot as another cog in society, that i'll somehow salvage this and be the person i always wanted to be. whats sad about that its not happening. that ship has long sailed but i can't let go.
Philosophical question to anyone reading this:
How did we end up in this world to begin with, only to be tortured by the depraved people among whom we chanced to be born? How can we prevent coming back to this place?
How did we end up in this world to begin with, only to be tortured by the depraved people among whom we chanced to be born? How can we prevent coming back to this place?
>>269573
Not directly, of course. My father taught me to stand up to him indirectly by forgetting he had a son with a succubus his height, so the tables would eventually turn.
Not directly, of course. My father taught me to stand up to him indirectly by forgetting he had a son with a succubus his height, so the tables would eventually turn.
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When I was 10 years old my mother and father yelled at each other every single day for months and this escalated until they hit each other with deadly weapons, leaving my mother begging for mercy on the floor, and my father fleeing the scene to abandon me. Oddly, when I looked at her eyes, crying and begging, I felt nothing but disgust. My suicidal thoughts first began at age 5 I suppose.
There's a competitor though. After this incident she kidnapped me shortly after, taking advantage of the fact that my father had abandoned me to take me to a 3rd world country for 6 months. Here she would beat me, scream at me, and threaten to kill me on a daily basis, holding weapons to give those claims a little more basis. She also fed me extremely poorly, I ended up relying on candy for sustinence since she refused to buy me proper food. To top it off I had no internet, no money and was bullied at my new private school, not even understanding the language properly, and knowing that any call for help I could make wouldn't be taken seriously.
During this time she dragged me around different streets, attempted to manipulate me and totally isolated me from all semblance of hope for a better life. One day, I grew tired of it an had the idea to kill her. I saw fear in her eyes as I looked at her, and she screamed calling me a psychopath. It felt good to have her scared for once, but I decided she wasn't worthy of staining my future.
The oddest part is though, to this day I received no sympathy for any of this. In fact, my siblings go as far as to claim they had it worse and that I should suck it all up. My world decays around me, the world itself decays around me, and there's not a shred of humanity to be found.
Even now… I have no hope of finding happiness. Not because I particularly care for my past, but because it set my trajectory to be this way. One with no hope of loving anything in this life.
There's a competitor though. After this incident she kidnapped me shortly after, taking advantage of the fact that my father had abandoned me to take me to a 3rd world country for 6 months. Here she would beat me, scream at me, and threaten to kill me on a daily basis, holding weapons to give those claims a little more basis. She also fed me extremely poorly, I ended up relying on candy for sustinence since she refused to buy me proper food. To top it off I had no internet, no money and was bullied at my new private school, not even understanding the language properly, and knowing that any call for help I could make wouldn't be taken seriously.
During this time she dragged me around different streets, attempted to manipulate me and totally isolated me from all semblance of hope for a better life. One day, I grew tired of it an had the idea to kill her. I saw fear in her eyes as I looked at her, and she screamed calling me a psychopath. It felt good to have her scared for once, but I decided she wasn't worthy of staining my future.
The oddest part is though, to this day I received no sympathy for any of this. In fact, my siblings go as far as to claim they had it worse and that I should suck it all up. My world decays around me, the world itself decays around me, and there's not a shred of humanity to be found.
Even now… I have no hope of finding happiness. Not because I particularly care for my past, but because it set my trajectory to be this way. One with no hope of loving anything in this life.
>>267760
when I was like 7 a nurse put me a enema pear in my rear without my consent. Doctors didn't care about me and humiliated me in various way. Of course for them it probably was just treatment but they never respected me as a young human being.
I never said anything about it but at that time it was very traumatizing for me. Of course if I said it to normies they would laugh at my face. Prove, I tried to say it to a psychiatriste and he basically laughed it off and said it was just standard medical procedures. So I'm glad to take it out somewhere after all these years. Go ahead and laugh I don't care since my life is already shitty
when I was like 7 a nurse put me a enema pear in my rear without my consent. Doctors didn't care about me and humiliated me in various way. Of course for them it probably was just treatment but they never respected me as a young human being.
I never said anything about it but at that time it was very traumatizing for me. Of course if I said it to normies they would laugh at my face. Prove, I tried to say it to a psychiatriste and he basically laughed it off and said it was just standard medical procedures. So I'm glad to take it out somewhere after all these years. Go ahead and laugh I don't care since my life is already shitty
>>278478
This is legit fucking brutal. I’m sorry you had to go through that Wiz. It’s things like this that remind me why a lot of people grow up making bad choices, they need to cope with the stress of their environments.
This is legit fucking brutal. I’m sorry you had to go through that Wiz. It’s things like this that remind me why a lot of people grow up making bad choices, they need to cope with the stress of their environments.
>>278478
I'm sorry that happened. Does that mean I agree with you? No. I don't think your past has set you up with a trajectory for further pain and misery. You could make this your strength.
I'm sorry that happened. Does that mean I agree with you? No. I don't think your past has set you up with a trajectory for further pain and misery. You could make this your strength.
>>278480
Several of my family held me down while i was screaming and shoved suppositories up my ass. I used to think it was just a medical thing that they had to do. Now i see it was unnecessary and think it seems equivalent to rape: not like i knew any different, i was 2-3 years old. If it were fine i wouldnt be in my 30s and still upset about it
Several of my family held me down while i was screaming and shoved suppositories up my ass. I used to think it was just a medical thing that they had to do. Now i see it was unnecessary and think it seems equivalent to rape: not like i knew any different, i was 2-3 years old. If it were fine i wouldnt be in my 30s and still upset about it
I got molested several times by my neighbor who was in his late teens when I was around 9 or 10 and when i told my mother way later she started smirking insecurely and just changed the topic lol, she didnt give a shit that this faggot traumatized me. My parents still hang out with that neighbor too because he owns the house now and has a family and my mother tells me about him sometimes as if i never told her that he molested me. Its crazy how my parents just act nice on the surface but are completely unable to have empathy for anyone. Having antisocial fake nice parents is one of the worst gaslighting experiences you can have, it took me almost 30 years to notice how they are the reason why i am such a weirdo.
This thread is full of manbabies that can't get over simple unfortunate events that happened to them way in the past and have no significance to the present or future.
A bunch of whiny manbabies.
A bunch of whiny manbabies.
>>280490
Why do you faggots insist on coming to our online fourm? go to to literally any of the dozens of normalfag websites/apps designed for you and fucking stay there you pathetic projecting fucking snake.
Why do you faggots insist on coming to our online fourm? go to to literally any of the dozens of normalfag websites/apps designed for you and fucking stay there you pathetic projecting fucking snake.
>>280495
>any of the dozens of normalfag websites/apps
That would make wizchan a normalfag site. Venting and support groups are a normalfag and failed normalfag thing. You're not aware of that which makes you an NPC.
>any of the dozens of normalfag websites/apps
That would make wizchan a normalfag site. Venting and support groups are a normalfag and failed normalfag thing. You're not aware of that which makes you an NPC.
>>280498
/dep/ has been the core part of wizchan besides /wiz/ you dumb retard. Also the recent replies here show how bad the quality of wizchan is now
/dep/ has been the core part of wizchan besides /wiz/ you dumb retard. Also the recent replies here show how bad the quality of wizchan is now
>>280500
>/dep/ has been the core part of wizchan
It doesn't mean anything. You don't even like the virgin lifestyle, you crabs come here to complain about how bad your life is without sex and tfw gf. You will never be a volcel you're just depressed failed normies.
you could argue complaining about the quality of the site is a core part of wizchan, dumb nigger.
Im the only volcel on this site apparently who isn't depressed.
>/dep/ has been the core part of wizchan
It doesn't mean anything. You don't even like the virgin lifestyle, you crabs come here to complain about how bad your life is without sex and tfw gf. You will never be a volcel you're just depressed failed normies.
you could argue complaining about the quality of the site is a core part of wizchan, dumb nigger.
Im the only volcel on this site apparently who isn't depressed.
>>280503
Please come and and visit us on /wiz/ and disseminate some information, then, befitting someone of your by the greens stature.
Incidentally, 'by the greens' is a statement I just coined meaning something along the lines of 'swell, happy, free and joyous'
I am not being sarcastic whatsoever in responding to you this way.
Let us have fun.
Please come and and visit us on /wiz/ and disseminate some information, then, befitting someone of your by the greens stature.
Incidentally, 'by the greens' is a statement I just coined meaning something along the lines of 'swell, happy, free and joyous'
I am not being sarcastic whatsoever in responding to you this way.
Let us have fun.
>>280503
Are you retarded? I never did any of the things you're assuming lol. Most /dep/ posters don't do these things you have mentioned, this thread is a classic /dep/ thread and these types of discussions have been a core part of wizchan since the beginning but I guess you must be relatively new here or you're one of those weird lurkers who only post when they think it's a good opportunity to shill some type of idea. Either way you definitely have no idea about the dynamics of the wizardchan community.
Are you retarded? I never did any of the things you're assuming lol. Most /dep/ posters don't do these things you have mentioned, this thread is a classic /dep/ thread and these types of discussions have been a core part of wizchan since the beginning but I guess you must be relatively new here or you're one of those weird lurkers who only post when they think it's a good opportunity to shill some type of idea. Either way you definitely have no idea about the dynamics of the wizardchan community.
>>280503
Even though this site is for male virgins its not about being volcel or crab, these terms by themselves are outsider terms. If you even feel the need to write a post like that you're just displaying your own lack of understanding of this imageboard. Wizardchan always had its own 'charme' that doesn't fit in any of these outsider terms and descriptions that you're using and you're just an outsider yourself.
I suggest that outsider faggots like you just start their own imageboard. Call it volcelchan or something like that and then you can circlejerk about being superior non-depressed 'volcels' there all day but spare this place with your faggotry because no one gives a shit about your idea or whatever you want to display in your shitty posts.
Even though this site is for male virgins its not about being volcel or crab, these terms by themselves are outsider terms. If you even feel the need to write a post like that you're just displaying your own lack of understanding of this imageboard. Wizardchan always had its own 'charme' that doesn't fit in any of these outsider terms and descriptions that you're using and you're just an outsider yourself.
I suggest that outsider faggots like you just start their own imageboard. Call it volcelchan or something like that and then you can circlejerk about being superior non-depressed 'volcels' there all day but spare this place with your faggotry because no one gives a shit about your idea or whatever you want to display in your shitty posts.
>>280504
>>280507
>>280508
> Call it volcelchan or something like that and then you can circlejerk about being superior non-depressed 'volcel
Wizchan is for volcels not depressed crabs. It's always been that way and was created with that in mind.
/Dep/ has done nothing for wizchan as a whole and it contributes to a worsened state because it attracts crabs. This is why the site is going to the dogs in terms of quality.
>>280507
>>280508
> Call it volcelchan or something like that and then you can circlejerk about being superior non-depressed 'volcel
Wizchan is for volcels not depressed crabs. It's always been that way and was created with that in mind.
/Dep/ has done nothing for wizchan as a whole and it contributes to a worsened state because it attracts crabs. This is why the site is going to the dogs in terms of quality.
>>280509
Look at this asshole spinning things, youre absolutely someone who hasn't been here for long and who tries to shill something. I guess you must be that weird progressive redditor guy that pisses everyone off on dep since weeks, its really not hard to notice your patterns.
Calling /dep/ posters depressed crabs is just another sign that you should fuck off. I wanted to say just fuck off from /dep/ if discussions about depression bother you so much but you should just leave entirely.
Also this very thread has no single crab post or anything about succubi, its a thread about trauma and you came rushing in calling others manbabies for discussing their childhood traumas like a complete retard who shouldn't be here.
Look at this asshole spinning things, youre absolutely someone who hasn't been here for long and who tries to shill something. I guess you must be that weird progressive redditor guy that pisses everyone off on dep since weeks, its really not hard to notice your patterns.
Calling /dep/ posters depressed crabs is just another sign that you should fuck off. I wanted to say just fuck off from /dep/ if discussions about depression bother you so much but you should just leave entirely.
Also this very thread has no single crab post or anything about succubi, its a thread about trauma and you came rushing in calling others manbabies for discussing their childhood traumas like a complete retard who shouldn't be here.
>>280512
meh you bring the whole site down with your empty and melodramatic posts that's why wizchan slows down to a crawl on the weekends.
Go back to reddit or r9k to vent about your crab feelings. This isn't the site.
You guys don't even want to improve or become wizards.
meh you bring the whole site down with your empty and melodramatic posts that's why wizchan slows down to a crawl on the weekends.
Go back to reddit or r9k to vent about your crab feelings. This isn't the site.
You guys don't even want to improve or become wizards.
>>280508
>Even though this site is for male virgins its not about being volcel or crab, these terms by themselves are outsider terms.
really? where on the outside are there volcels?
>Even though this site is for male virgins its not about being volcel or crab, these terms by themselves are outsider terms.
really? where on the outside are there volcels?
>>280525
depression isn't necessarily caused by negative experiences with succubi, you're making it seem as though "volcels" are either immune to depression and trauma, or that they're not allowed to express their struggles with depression if they do suffer from it, which is an unhealthy notion caused by machismo worship, it's also false since having an outlet contributes towards self-improvement greatly, although i don't know what you specifically consider self-improvement to be
depression isn't necessarily caused by negative experiences with succubi, you're making it seem as though "volcels" are either immune to depression and trauma, or that they're not allowed to express their struggles with depression if they do suffer from it, which is an unhealthy notion caused by machismo worship, it's also false since having an outlet contributes towards self-improvement greatly, although i don't know what you specifically consider self-improvement to be
>>280529
it makes male virgins look bad though. like imagine if instead of dep, wizchan was full of stories about how great life was being a virgin.
instead of coming here to laugh or pity us, the normies would be jealous of us. i mean men are pretty jaded with succubi to begin with these days. imagine the propaganda, if wizchan was about how great our lives without succubi were.
it makes male virgins look bad though. like imagine if instead of dep, wizchan was full of stories about how great life was being a virgin.
instead of coming here to laugh or pity us, the normies would be jealous of us. i mean men are pretty jaded with succubi to begin with these days. imagine the propaganda, if wizchan was about how great our lives without succubi were.
>>280530
An imageboard of wizards who are happy with being themselves and living their lives disregarding succubi and sex. But ((())) don't want that. They want wizchan to be as one of the most depressing imageboards so that nobody tries to escape the rat race and so everyone gets addicted to sex and pussy. They don't want men to be happy alone and by themselves, they want those men who are virgins to be sad and suicidal and a site that offers no alternative for that type of life.
We still have a lot to work on to create a good imageboard for wizards.
An imageboard of wizards who are happy with being themselves and living their lives disregarding succubi and sex. But ((())) don't want that. They want wizchan to be as one of the most depressing imageboards so that nobody tries to escape the rat race and so everyone gets addicted to sex and pussy. They don't want men to be happy alone and by themselves, they want those men who are virgins to be sad and suicidal and a site that offers no alternative for that type of life.
We still have a lot to work on to create a good imageboard for wizards.
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>>280485
how about being circumcised (literally screaming in agony while being knife raped at less than a month old) and your parents look on gladly without a thought to interrupt the torture.
how about being circumcised (literally screaming in agony while being knife raped at less than a month old) and your parents look on gladly without a thought to interrupt the torture.
>>280525
I shared nothing about crab feelings you dumb faggot, stop making empty assumptions. You're the one who insults regular /dep/ posters as manbabies and you should get banned for it
>>280530
So at least you admit that you have some weird agenda fag
>>280531
>We still have a lot to work on to create a good imageboard for wizards.
Wizchan is over a decade old you retard, it's a shaped community
Also samefag
I shared nothing about crab feelings you dumb faggot, stop making empty assumptions. You're the one who insults regular /dep/ posters as manbabies and you should get banned for it
>>280530
So at least you admit that you have some weird agenda fag
>>280531
>We still have a lot to work on to create a good imageboard for wizards.
Wizchan is over a decade old you retard, it's a shaped community
Also samefag
>>280537
By shitting on wizards who are discussing childhood trauma and accusing them of crab posting out of nowhere? No logic behind your posts. Scroll up and look at how you derailed a perfectly reasonable thread. You are just another schizo who takes advantage of the low traffic and bad moderation here.
By shitting on wizards who are discussing childhood trauma and accusing them of crab posting out of nowhere? No logic behind your posts. Scroll up and look at how you derailed a perfectly reasonable thread. You are just another schizo who takes advantage of the low traffic and bad moderation here.
>>280536
the problem with you crabs is that you want everyone to look as bad as you, be as sad as you, be as miserable as you. It's everywhere, from the language you use, to the topics you want to discuss on here, or the threads you keep bumping and making, and even the accusations you come up with.
You will never grow up as a wizard but keep ruining wizard spaces like this one and giving us a bad image to the few wizards who like this life by bringing nothing but negativity.
You really don't want to be a virgin and just want to complain about how bad it is to be a wiz then leave this site.
the problem with you crabs is that you want everyone to look as bad as you, be as sad as you, be as miserable as you. It's everywhere, from the language you use, to the topics you want to discuss on here, or the threads you keep bumping and making, and even the accusations you come up with.
You will never grow up as a wizard but keep ruining wizard spaces like this one and giving us a bad image to the few wizards who like this life by bringing nothing but negativity.
You really don't want to be a virgin and just want to complain about how bad it is to be a wiz then leave this site.
>>280539
lol schizo
wizzies are discussing how they got beat up by their parents and molested as a child in this thread and you accuse them of being crabs for some reason. are you hallucinating?
lol schizo
wizzies are discussing how they got beat up by their parents and molested as a child in this thread and you accuse them of being crabs for some reason. are you hallucinating?
>>280540
that's exactly what crabs do. They do nothing but discuss depressing shit about their lives.
that's exactly what crabs do. They do nothing but discuss depressing shit about their lives.
>>280534
i couldnt cope with that. i supposed it's an unmutilated perspective but i feel i'd kill my parents if they did that to me.
i couldnt cope with that. i supposed it's an unmutilated perspective but i feel i'd kill my parents if they did that to me.
I feel kinda like a little bitch for considering this "traumatic" but oh well.
>4th grade, with 3rd grader "best friend", weekend afternoon, somewhere in bumfuck nowhere Arkansas, US of A
My "best friend" wants to show me something he found in the woods about a mile from our neighborhood. Won't tell me what it is. His dad is a cop, and WITHOUT TELLING ME, my friend stole his dad's handgun and kept it in his backpack while we were walking off to the secluded forest-area.
We arrive near the woods and he puts his backpack down and pulls the gun out of it. Being a kid he needs both hands just to keep it up, I guess it was heavy, I don't know shit about guns.
He says he's going to kill me and keeps the gun pointed toward my face while standing two or three feet away from me.
I remember kinda slowly strafing around him a little and saying something like "you're not going to do it". The situation lasted around a minute before he starts laughing and says he was joking and puts the gun in his backpack again. I don't remember what we did after that. I never knew if the gun was even loaded or if his dad ever found out. The situation may have lasted only about a minute, but it really did feel like a lot longer, people really aren't lying when they say a bad situation felt like it took forever.
Boys are often troublemakers, so if he had just told me had his dad's gun, I'd have been perfectly willing to go shoot at random shit in the woods with him. If he had no bullets and just told me the gun was unloaded and then pointed it at me as a joke, I wouldn't have felt so betrayed.
>4th grade, with 3rd grader "best friend", weekend afternoon, somewhere in bumfuck nowhere Arkansas, US of A
My "best friend" wants to show me something he found in the woods about a mile from our neighborhood. Won't tell me what it is. His dad is a cop, and WITHOUT TELLING ME, my friend stole his dad's handgun and kept it in his backpack while we were walking off to the secluded forest-area.
We arrive near the woods and he puts his backpack down and pulls the gun out of it. Being a kid he needs both hands just to keep it up, I guess it was heavy, I don't know shit about guns.
He says he's going to kill me and keeps the gun pointed toward my face while standing two or three feet away from me.
I remember kinda slowly strafing around him a little and saying something like "you're not going to do it". The situation lasted around a minute before he starts laughing and says he was joking and puts the gun in his backpack again. I don't remember what we did after that. I never knew if the gun was even loaded or if his dad ever found out. The situation may have lasted only about a minute, but it really did feel like a lot longer, people really aren't lying when they say a bad situation felt like it took forever.
Boys are often troublemakers, so if he had just told me had his dad's gun, I'd have been perfectly willing to go shoot at random shit in the woods with him. If he had no bullets and just told me the gun was unloaded and then pointed it at me as a joke, I wouldn't have felt so betrayed.
>>280550
honest question. Are you male or female because your story comes off as something a female would write.
honest question. Are you male or female because your story comes off as something a female would write.
>>280550
I don't judge you for considering this traumatic, people can handle different situations completely differently.
I don't judge you for considering this traumatic, people can handle different situations completely differently.
>>280550
Someone pointing a gun at you that you don't know is loaded while saying "I am going to kill you" is a pretty significant event.
Someone pointing a gun at you that you don't know is loaded while saying "I am going to kill you" is a pretty significant event.
>>280550
that's pretty fucking stupid joke. i can see why it's been traumatic for you. i hate this kind of "friends". they deserve to be shot themselves
that's pretty fucking stupid joke. i can see why it's been traumatic for you. i hate this kind of "friends". they deserve to be shot themselves
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>Being 1-3 years old, I remember myself very small and without much ability to walk
>Being in charge of a babysitter
>She undresses me at one point and leaves me lying
> She starts touching me
> She hits my genitals (I only remember the pain)
> Stick her fingers with false nails in my anus, whole
The truth is that this memory is very diffuse, I don't know if it's real, they are images that come to my mind and emotionally I feel what happened, when I think about it I get nauseated, stomach pain, tachycardia and sensations in my parts, I have always had an intense fear of anal/genital pain and pointy/sharp things, as a child I had strange somatic sensations in my genitals and anus, now the same but less, somehow I am dealing with this alone, one day I cried and I had a panic cry with sensations stomach, even I get scared. I don't know if it ends here, because I have impressions and feelings that they raped me later when I was 4-5 years old, for some reason they are always succubi, I don't remember that anymore, but I feel that if I go through, that stage of my childhood changes my attitude a lot. personality, also due to a very ugly divorce and I was very afraid of my mother as well as being dependent on her (who hit me, yelled and terrified me about my father), I had ugly behavioral changes such as panic/anger attacks and terror of strangers or being raped/kidnapped (one of my biggest fears at a young age). Well, sorry if it's badly written, I do this with google translator.
>Being in charge of a babysitter
>She undresses me at one point and leaves me lying
> She starts touching me
> She hits my genitals (I only remember the pain)
> Stick her fingers with false nails in my anus, whole
The truth is that this memory is very diffuse, I don't know if it's real, they are images that come to my mind and emotionally I feel what happened, when I think about it I get nauseated, stomach pain, tachycardia and sensations in my parts, I have always had an intense fear of anal/genital pain and pointy/sharp things, as a child I had strange somatic sensations in my genitals and anus, now the same but less, somehow I am dealing with this alone, one day I cried and I had a panic cry with sensations stomach, even I get scared. I don't know if it ends here, because I have impressions and feelings that they raped me later when I was 4-5 years old, for some reason they are always succubi, I don't remember that anymore, but I feel that if I go through, that stage of my childhood changes my attitude a lot. personality, also due to a very ugly divorce and I was very afraid of my mother as well as being dependent on her (who hit me, yelled and terrified me about my father), I had ugly behavioral changes such as panic/anger attacks and terror of strangers or being raped/kidnapped (one of my biggest fears at a young age). Well, sorry if it's badly written, I do this with google translator.
>>280489
When I got molested by my faggot neighbor on several occasions I was just too young and autistic to be assertive enough to make him stop. I kinda suspected that what he was doing was sexual because I've been exposed to porn way too early but at the same time I wasn't sure what was going on. I always felt bad afterwards and humiliated which eventually turned into self hatred. I also remember having weird sexual dreams way early and it was always themed around abuse or other weird shit. I also used to have gay tendencies which I guess is quite typical for guys who got molested by some faggot in their childhood from what I'm hearing but I was able to get through that because I realized it was just a mixture of the abuse and affection issues on top of a porn addiction. It's really something that messes you up for life. I kinda blame my parents for it as well because they never bothered to raise a child with self-esteem or confidence and I've always been the victim of bullying as well just like my brother because our parents equally lacked confidence and only gave shit guidance when it came to social stuff.
When I got molested by my faggot neighbor on several occasions I was just too young and autistic to be assertive enough to make him stop. I kinda suspected that what he was doing was sexual because I've been exposed to porn way too early but at the same time I wasn't sure what was going on. I always felt bad afterwards and humiliated which eventually turned into self hatred. I also remember having weird sexual dreams way early and it was always themed around abuse or other weird shit. I also used to have gay tendencies which I guess is quite typical for guys who got molested by some faggot in their childhood from what I'm hearing but I was able to get through that because I realized it was just a mixture of the abuse and affection issues on top of a porn addiction. It's really something that messes you up for life. I kinda blame my parents for it as well because they never bothered to raise a child with self-esteem or confidence and I've always been the victim of bullying as well just like my brother because our parents equally lacked confidence and only gave shit guidance when it came to social stuff.
>>280649
Christ that sounds horrible, some fucking ugly fat pedo succubi doing that doesn't sound like a larp at all. I hope you can recover and heal from your wounds wizzie, you never deserved to deal with that.
Christ that sounds horrible, some fucking ugly fat pedo succubi doing that doesn't sound like a larp at all. I hope you can recover and heal from your wounds wizzie, you never deserved to deal with that.
>>280655
Unfortunately parents can't give you confidence to smack your bully in face. You must be born with it. They could buy martial art lessons though. It helps.
Unfortunately parents can't give you confidence to smack your bully in face. You must be born with it. They could buy martial art lessons though. It helps.
I was around 6 or 7 when this happened, my family worked in a 3rd world country. We had two native male workers who helped keep up the property. One day I was at the property we owned alone no one but the two workers and me. I was outside of the house and both them started chasing me, grabbing me, carrying me around, cornering me. I remember all the times they would let me break free from their grip as to make me a sport again as they chased me over and over. They always made sure I never got close to the door of the house knowing I could lock them out. They topped it off with tying my hands to a pole and they went over to the barrel that was used for burning things, they started the fire up, grabbed a a metal pole and warmed it up and made their way towards me. During the whole time they were at the fire I was yanking and pulling my wrists were bleeding due to how hard I was trying to break free. Broke free but my wrists were bleeding badly, they mocked me as I ran, letting me go finally. Never did I tell my parents.
>>280657
>parents can't give you confidence to smack your bully in face
i totally disagree. if parents let kids talk back a little; it teaches them to stand up for themselves.
many boomer parents bullied their kids themselves with the muh roof muh rules and muh way or muh highway bullshit.
those are kids that never learned to fight back
>parents can't give you confidence to smack your bully in face
i totally disagree. if parents let kids talk back a little; it teaches them to stand up for themselves.
many boomer parents bullied their kids themselves with the muh roof muh rules and muh way or muh highway bullshit.
those are kids that never learned to fight back
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>>281059
Real happened in Asia, workers names were Jumrong and Somon. Tie they used.
Real happened in Asia, workers names were Jumrong and Somon. Tie they used.
>>267760
I never recovered from the intense bullying I received at school. From 13-18 I had to put up with it every single day. Both physical and mental abuse. Teachers did nothing and I couldn't tell my parents, even though I'm sure they knew with how often I'd come home with mud on my school trousers. I still have scars on my cheeks and hands where I was cut with the blades of pencil sharpeners. The trauma from such intense bullying basically turned me into a shut in. I didn't know how to talk to people. I went from fantastic grades to total ambivalence towards education. After all, the establishment failed me and I was in no place to learn. I became a shut-in, more interested in games and escapism than anything else. I found things like Gaia online, anime, 4chan and so on. On my very final day of school I was chased away and pelted with tomatos to the laughter of everyone in my year. I didn't care though since I was just glad it was over. I went to university as it was expected but even there I failed and graduated with a worthless degree of low score. Years of NEETdom followed before I landed a dead-end job I hate with all of my soul. All of this combined basically fucked me over for the next near two decades.
I'm 30 and only now is it really all becoming abundantly clear how fucked up I am. Even though years ago I told myself I wouldn't care. I do care though. I haven't been happy since I was a child. My life has been such a fucking waste. I still dream about school constantly. I remember their faces, their names, even though I know they've long since forgotten me. I hate them. I fucking hate all of them.
I never recovered from the intense bullying I received at school. From 13-18 I had to put up with it every single day. Both physical and mental abuse. Teachers did nothing and I couldn't tell my parents, even though I'm sure they knew with how often I'd come home with mud on my school trousers. I still have scars on my cheeks and hands where I was cut with the blades of pencil sharpeners. The trauma from such intense bullying basically turned me into a shut in. I didn't know how to talk to people. I went from fantastic grades to total ambivalence towards education. After all, the establishment failed me and I was in no place to learn. I became a shut-in, more interested in games and escapism than anything else. I found things like Gaia online, anime, 4chan and so on. On my very final day of school I was chased away and pelted with tomatos to the laughter of everyone in my year. I didn't care though since I was just glad it was over. I went to university as it was expected but even there I failed and graduated with a worthless degree of low score. Years of NEETdom followed before I landed a dead-end job I hate with all of my soul. All of this combined basically fucked me over for the next near two decades.
I'm 30 and only now is it really all becoming abundantly clear how fucked up I am. Even though years ago I told myself I wouldn't care. I do care though. I haven't been happy since I was a child. My life has been such a fucking waste. I still dream about school constantly. I remember their faces, their names, even though I know they've long since forgotten me. I hate them. I fucking hate all of them.
>>281105
I'm sorry those things happened to you, my wizard friend. No one deserves such treatment.
Who knows what the future holds for any of us but I hope you can find some peace.
I'm sorry those things happened to you, my wizard friend. No one deserves such treatment.
Who knows what the future holds for any of us but I hope you can find some peace.
>>281105
Ridiculous how fuckton of people think this only happens in anime. It's a fucking joke. These bullies should be killed on the stop with no remorse and yet they're so fucking many. And then they ask why this world is fucked. Goddamn I hate psychopaths so much.
Ridiculous how fuckton of people think this only happens in anime. It's a fucking joke. These bullies should be killed on the stop with no remorse and yet they're so fucking many. And then they ask why this world is fucked. Goddamn I hate psychopaths so much.
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>>281105
Similar happened to me too, I had cigarettes put out on me and had holes burnt into my clothes and hair. My parents knew and didn't care. It still affects me today years later, I'm a worthless drug addict in a dead end job while they're mostly in jail.
Similar happened to me too, I had cigarettes put out on me and had holes burnt into my clothes and hair. My parents knew and didn't care. It still affects me today years later, I'm a worthless drug addict in a dead end job while they're mostly in jail.
>>281105
>I still dream about school constantly.
Same for me, also in my 30s. The school system is pureposely designed to break outliers
>I still dream about school constantly.
Same for me, also in my 30s. The school system is pureposely designed to break outliers
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>>281352
Shamelessly bumping my own thread on this lonely Tuesday night. Please accept this comfy apu as penance.
Shamelessly bumping my own thread on this lonely Tuesday night. Please accept this comfy apu as penance.
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Here's one. When I was 11 for most of Summer I was enraptured in a terrible spell of OCD that was obsessed with repeating the same patterns not only in real life but my head correctly, repeating words, and talking about sex and incest to the detriment of my family and friends. It climaxed asking my sister with the disclaimer that I didn't mean it to have sex with me, while she and my mom were talking in the laundry room. We were going to go see a funny movie later that night and there was nothing wrong with anyone's day so everyone was in good moods until that happened. My parents were so distraught and angry, and my sister speechless and uncomfortable (I couldn't look at her) that I just spent the next few days in my room, they probably sent me there but I don't remember. My sister never liked me much to begin with and since then there is an uncomfortable divide between us that'll never close.
>>282893
tell her it was just a funny youtube prank
> It climaxed asking my sister with the disclaimer that I didn't mean it to have sex with me, while she and my mom were talking in the laundry room.
I mean laundry room? It just fits
tell her it was just a funny youtube prank
> It climaxed asking my sister with the disclaimer that I didn't mean it to have sex with me, while she and my mom were talking in the laundry room.
I mean laundry room? It just fits
>>282893
I fully lacked self awareness when I was young, I came in contact with hentai and told everyone I was drawing this rape comic book, which I did, but the characters kind looked like South Park and the story was about a masked serial rapist that in the end is revealed to be a tranny (you see, that was the big surprise, people reading would assume she was set in to be one of the victims, it was actually a dude and the perpetrator), and I watched this Ecchi anime called Aika, and began drawing succubi showing panties everywhere, including tests at school. I was not even sexually aware despite being 12-13, I just thought it all was cool, and only years later I realized what I was doing. I'm so thankful for the Internet not being as big back then, Chris-chan might have been me.
I fully lacked self awareness when I was young, I came in contact with hentai and told everyone I was drawing this rape comic book, which I did, but the characters kind looked like South Park and the story was about a masked serial rapist that in the end is revealed to be a tranny (you see, that was the big surprise, people reading would assume she was set in to be one of the victims, it was actually a dude and the perpetrator), and I watched this Ecchi anime called Aika, and began drawing succubi showing panties everywhere, including tests at school. I was not even sexually aware despite being 12-13, I just thought it all was cool, and only years later I realized what I was doing. I'm so thankful for the Internet not being as big back then, Chris-chan might have been me.
>>282897
https://villains.fandom.com/wiki/The_Carver_(Nip/Tuck)
The Carver is ultimately revealed to be Dr. Quentin Costa, with his sister and lover Kit McGraw as his accomplice.
https://villains.fandom.com/wiki/The_Carver_(Nip/Tuck)
The Carver is ultimately revealed to be Dr. Quentin Costa, with his sister and lover Kit McGraw as his accomplice.
Parents caught me on video masturbating with a hidden camera and showed it to my siblings
Its a wonder I even still associate with them
Its a wonder I even still associate with them
I feel like every time I make a post in a thread even for ones that are innocuous they grind to a halt or the post quality drops. Did I signal the death of the thread with my arrival and post that pales in comparison to everyone else's? Is what I posted not good enough and a joke? Not to insult or put down others in this thread but sorry I didn't post a good enough experience. It's like there's IP gangstalkers following me where ever I go mocking me so I'm always unsatisfied and alienated.
>>267760
>Share your various traumatic experiences that still haunts you to this very day.
Not sure what to pick. I mean, even though I've been diagnosed with major depressive disorder, social anxiety disorder, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, delusional disorder, psychotic disorder not otherwise specified, and post-traumatic stress disorder… often times when I've tried complaining about traumatic experiences; I tend to get responses like, "get over it," and, "you're weak." So I feel as if I can't really pick which of my experiences in life were the ones that traumatized me. But, well, nobody else really seems to remember what I remember. And my mental health care providers wouldn't really listen what I had to tell them. So what ended up happening is that two of my mental health care providers (a psychiatrist and a psychologist) that diagnosed me with five out of seven of those disorders ended up threatening to place restraining orders on me for pestering them, and one therapist actually did place a restraining order on me.
So I often think to myself, "what purpose does my diagnosis serve? Why did I blow through over $10,000 over the course of 10 years just to end up worse than I started?"
And to think that before I received my official diagnosis; I was concerned with having narcissistic personality disorder and antisocial personality disorder… (I was actually tested for these and was told that I don't have them–a DNA test even revealed that I have no genetic predisposition to psychopathy–a $100 DNA test that nobody gives fuck all about)
>Share your various traumatic experiences that still haunts you to this very day.
Not sure what to pick. I mean, even though I've been diagnosed with major depressive disorder, social anxiety disorder, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, delusional disorder, psychotic disorder not otherwise specified, and post-traumatic stress disorder… often times when I've tried complaining about traumatic experiences; I tend to get responses like, "get over it," and, "you're weak." So I feel as if I can't really pick which of my experiences in life were the ones that traumatized me. But, well, nobody else really seems to remember what I remember. And my mental health care providers wouldn't really listen what I had to tell them. So what ended up happening is that two of my mental health care providers (a psychiatrist and a psychologist) that diagnosed me with five out of seven of those disorders ended up threatening to place restraining orders on me for pestering them, and one therapist actually did place a restraining order on me.
So I often think to myself, "what purpose does my diagnosis serve? Why did I blow through over $10,000 over the course of 10 years just to end up worse than I started?"
And to think that before I received my official diagnosis; I was concerned with having narcissistic personality disorder and antisocial personality disorder… (I was actually tested for these and was told that I don't have them–a DNA test even revealed that I have no genetic predisposition to psychopathy–a $100 DNA test that nobody gives fuck all about)
Where do I begin with this? How about…
>Be me
>Be in high school where I'm only one of 3 minorities
>Be bullied by every single white sister fucker in the entire godforsaken school for being both a minority and being autistic
>Mom gets job at same school
>The bullying gets worse
>End up having lunch out of my mom's office every single goddamn day.
>School life becomes so bad want to unalive self
>Parents somehow talk me out of it
>Bullying continues to get worse
>Get threatened with potential murder
>Mom FINALLY hits the eject button and transfers me to different school
>Think I'm safe
>Take bus to school
>Bullying continues but now it's from ghetto folks
At this point I can't stand the neurotypical general public and I try to avoid them as much as possible, much to the dismay of my parents.
>Be me
>Be in high school where I'm only one of 3 minorities
>Be bullied by every single white sister fucker in the entire godforsaken school for being both a minority and being autistic
>Mom gets job at same school
>The bullying gets worse
>End up having lunch out of my mom's office every single goddamn day.
>School life becomes so bad want to unalive self
>Parents somehow talk me out of it
>Bullying continues to get worse
>Get threatened with potential murder
>Mom FINALLY hits the eject button and transfers me to different school
>Think I'm safe
>Take bus to school
>Bullying continues but now it's from ghetto folks
At this point I can't stand the neurotypical general public and I try to avoid them as much as possible, much to the dismay of my parents.
>>282941
They're demonic. You either let them brainwash you into becoming a stupid normie or they abuse you psychologically and physically.
They're demonic. You either let them brainwash you into becoming a stupid normie or they abuse you psychologically and physically.
>>267760
well when i was around 6 or 5, i was crying in a corner because my cousins had been bullying me, and then my dad grabbed me by the throat and choked me all the way up to my room, but i've forgotten what happened then, because he choked me so hard i lost consciousness on by the time we got to the staircase.
well when i was around 6 or 5, i was crying in a corner because my cousins had been bullying me, and then my dad grabbed me by the throat and choked me all the way up to my room, but i've forgotten what happened then, because he choked me so hard i lost consciousness on by the time we got to the staircase.
At this point the best way I can describe it as is AEDS: Acquired Emotional Deficiency Syndrome.
I've certainly learned to live with it rather than make it more painfully convoluted than it already was.
I've certainly learned to live with it rather than make it more painfully convoluted than it already was.
>>283567
I'm stuck wondering whether I'm just an autistic sociopath and this is my normal state or if I was once normal but something just bleached the emotions out of me.
I'm stuck wondering whether I'm just an autistic sociopath and this is my normal state or if I was once normal but something just bleached the emotions out of me.
I posted here before years ago but I remember being in kindergarten and having the other kids force me to be buried about chest deep into the sand pit. It was tight, I couldn't even move my fingers lol. It was probably the scariest moment of my life, even a dumb 4 year old like me who thought he was literally a dragon decided to stop being retarded and realise i'm in serious danger. The teachers took their sweet time helping me out.
>>275094
A few days after I got into a fight with another kid at middle school his mom and brother pulled up in their green and black muscle car while waiting to get picked up, and questioned me if there was going to be any problems with me and their family again. Why would she do this, to intimidate me, get me beaten up again? What the fuck would I do about it, I lost the fight anyway because I'm a big pussy, even my mom said I don't know how to defend myself. My dad saw it happened and he got pissed and said not to ever talk in a situation like that again, he was pissed in general at me around this time in my life. Sorry for blogposting.
A few days after I got into a fight with another kid at middle school his mom and brother pulled up in their green and black muscle car while waiting to get picked up, and questioned me if there was going to be any problems with me and their family again. Why would she do this, to intimidate me, get me beaten up again? What the fuck would I do about it, I lost the fight anyway because I'm a big pussy, even my mom said I don't know how to defend myself. My dad saw it happened and he got pissed and said not to ever talk in a situation like that again, he was pissed in general at me around this time in my life. Sorry for blogposting.
>>267760
>Be 9 or 10
>Brother is 13 or so
>Brother and i start wrestling
>It turns into almost a sexual thing he pins me down and we act like are kissing
>After that stopped laughing
I also have some vague memory of when he put his dick in my mouth or my face.
>Be around 10-11
>Play with neighborhood kids (The houses where very close together)
>Always getting bullied by the succubi, etc
>Hit and made me feel horrible about myself
>SH because i was a retarded kid.
I don't remember anything else and my memory isn't very good.
>Be 9 or 10
>Brother is 13 or so
>Brother and i start wrestling
>It turns into almost a sexual thing he pins me down and we act like are kissing
>After that stopped laughing
I also have some vague memory of when he put his dick in my mouth or my face.
>Be around 10-11
>Play with neighborhood kids (The houses where very close together)
>Always getting bullied by the succubi, etc
>Hit and made me feel horrible about myself
>SH because i was a retarded kid.
I don't remember anything else and my memory isn't very good.
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Typing all this out was really therapeutic. I sometimes forget that I have simply not been blessed with the support systems and parents other people have. I am building everything up from ground 0. I have been hurt in serious ways, and I must heal. It's fine to take it slow, but I must be sure I am taking it. Now then:
>Got excited about a hand bells course in middle school (I know, but I'd hoped to make friends) in middle school, and a group of guys within lured me into false camaraderie; eventually after a week of pretending we were best pals, they locked me in the equipment room for several hours after school. I still don't know what I did wrong. After that, we continued being "friends", but I'm old enough now (24) to look back on our "friendship" and realize I was just the dog they kept around to kick. I wish I'd joined band or orchestra…high-school proved the former group was full of nerdy and kind types and the latter was mostly rich kids who would leave me alone. Hand bells was full of kids who HAD to take a music course but didn't want to put forth effort anywhere else. I was there because I was shy. If I could go back I'd seriously avoid those guys, they put me through so much awful bullshit growing up.
>All those moments in my life where my mother treated me as if I was playing Serious, Real mind games with her, and I believed it growing up. Now I'm older and I think how the FUCK did a 40+ year old succubus believe her 6 - 16 year old son was a master manipulator? Why did she never think "Well hey, why does my young son feel the urge to lie to me?" and why did she insist I was lying when I was very obviously telling the truth? Sometimes I record our arguments now and it's just her hearing shit I did not say or forgetting things she herself promised. Gave me so many confidence, anxiety, etc. issues that I am only now starting to unravel.
>My father making me walk out to the woods to select the switches he would then beat me with so the welts tore up my legs. Then he would make me walk down the street to show them off to my grandpa. I now think anyone who harms a child should be shot.
>My mother getting so pissed off at me in kindergarten for wanting to speak to another kid at her job (she was around her work friends) that she made me eat my dinner off the floor like a dog. She'd often use me as a punching bag. Just yelling all the time. Talking all the time. Used to strangle me for fun, but she now denies it.
>Lunch in highschool senior year. One of the guys got tired of me and told everyone a lie so they'd avoid me. I ended up skipping it every day to go read in the library, and I had to deal with the kindly old librarian telling me what a good kid I was. My grades were trash however. But it was such a lonely period of my life. Whole rooms going quiet whenever I walked in. People wholesale ignoring the things I said.
>Getting my head slammed into the bus seat. First act of violence done upon me (outside of my parents). I really don't know why they did that. I'm scared I got brain damage from it, because it happened up until….third grade? I told a school counselor I wanted to kill myself at some point and she mocked me for it later.
>Playing basketball with a succubus and she, at one point, told me I'd never amount to shit. We were in elementary school. Every day alive I fear she cursed me (though I logically know it was just childish bullying), because I'm typing this from my childhood home. Nothing to be happy about. The afterglow from earning my degree has long since worn off; I have returned to the state of a useless adult. I pray this interview tomorrow works out well.
>Got excited about a hand bells course in middle school (I know, but I'd hoped to make friends) in middle school, and a group of guys within lured me into false camaraderie; eventually after a week of pretending we were best pals, they locked me in the equipment room for several hours after school. I still don't know what I did wrong. After that, we continued being "friends", but I'm old enough now (24) to look back on our "friendship" and realize I was just the dog they kept around to kick. I wish I'd joined band or orchestra…high-school proved the former group was full of nerdy and kind types and the latter was mostly rich kids who would leave me alone. Hand bells was full of kids who HAD to take a music course but didn't want to put forth effort anywhere else. I was there because I was shy. If I could go back I'd seriously avoid those guys, they put me through so much awful bullshit growing up.
>All those moments in my life where my mother treated me as if I was playing Serious, Real mind games with her, and I believed it growing up. Now I'm older and I think how the FUCK did a 40+ year old succubus believe her 6 - 16 year old son was a master manipulator? Why did she never think "Well hey, why does my young son feel the urge to lie to me?" and why did she insist I was lying when I was very obviously telling the truth? Sometimes I record our arguments now and it's just her hearing shit I did not say or forgetting things she herself promised. Gave me so many confidence, anxiety, etc. issues that I am only now starting to unravel.
>My father making me walk out to the woods to select the switches he would then beat me with so the welts tore up my legs. Then he would make me walk down the street to show them off to my grandpa. I now think anyone who harms a child should be shot.
>My mother getting so pissed off at me in kindergarten for wanting to speak to another kid at her job (she was around her work friends) that she made me eat my dinner off the floor like a dog. She'd often use me as a punching bag. Just yelling all the time. Talking all the time. Used to strangle me for fun, but she now denies it.
>Lunch in highschool senior year. One of the guys got tired of me and told everyone a lie so they'd avoid me. I ended up skipping it every day to go read in the library, and I had to deal with the kindly old librarian telling me what a good kid I was. My grades were trash however. But it was such a lonely period of my life. Whole rooms going quiet whenever I walked in. People wholesale ignoring the things I said.
>Getting my head slammed into the bus seat. First act of violence done upon me (outside of my parents). I really don't know why they did that. I'm scared I got brain damage from it, because it happened up until….third grade? I told a school counselor I wanted to kill myself at some point and she mocked me for it later.
>Playing basketball with a succubus and she, at one point, told me I'd never amount to shit. We were in elementary school. Every day alive I fear she cursed me (though I logically know it was just childish bullying), because I'm typing this from my childhood home. Nothing to be happy about. The afterglow from earning my degree has long since worn off; I have returned to the state of a useless adult. I pray this interview tomorrow works out well.
i am going through a stage where i think violence can only be answered with violence. humanity exists in a state of perpetual war/conflict for a reason. it is impossible to explain them shit. you can only kill them, they will try to kill you in response and here we go forever.
>>286010
I applaud your strength. Being born to evil parents has caused me to doubt god. Not to mention being forced to be around stupid brutal schoolchildren through all of childhood. Why did our souls suffer such injuries? There is no reason for any of it. You're an excellent writer with a heart too kind and a mind too smart to ever fall into any mental traps set by your abusers. Just keep going. I am doing the same but it is very hard.
I applaud your strength. Being born to evil parents has caused me to doubt god. Not to mention being forced to be around stupid brutal schoolchildren through all of childhood. Why did our souls suffer such injuries? There is no reason for any of it. You're an excellent writer with a heart too kind and a mind too smart to ever fall into any mental traps set by your abusers. Just keep going. I am doing the same but it is very hard.
Nothing bad enough like much of this thread happened to me. My life is a slow burn of many moderate misfortunes that were never enough to set me over the edge but allowed me to mentally adapt to stoicism and ambivalence. So I just have to settle here, as a dog.
I'd definitely suicide if something pushed me enough. I've called this hypothetical the "Catalyst" if it ever comes.
I'd definitely suicide if something pushed me enough. I've called this hypothetical the "Catalyst" if it ever comes.
>>286071
I agree. And even if a peace is built, it can only last in a highly intelligent society where every member is aware of the facts at all times.
The stupider and more easily manipulated the members of said society, the quicker it devolves into anarchy, then arbitrary violence and then groups killing other groups.
There is a reason why fake news are impossible to spread and gain zero acceptance in certain countries, and why they routinely start conflicts and wars in others.
The vast majority of nations consist of utter primitives who can barely read and write. They are literal bonobos and chimpanzees in mental function who just have homo sapiens bodies. It's very stupifying to think of it, but the US is closer to those ape nations than it is to a place like Iceland or Japan.
I agree. And even if a peace is built, it can only last in a highly intelligent society where every member is aware of the facts at all times.
The stupider and more easily manipulated the members of said society, the quicker it devolves into anarchy, then arbitrary violence and then groups killing other groups.
There is a reason why fake news are impossible to spread and gain zero acceptance in certain countries, and why they routinely start conflicts and wars in others.
The vast majority of nations consist of utter primitives who can barely read and write. They are literal bonobos and chimpanzees in mental function who just have homo sapiens bodies. It's very stupifying to think of it, but the US is closer to those ape nations than it is to a place like Iceland or Japan.
>>290521
https://www.usnews.com/news/best-countries/articles/2023-01-27/finland-most-resistant-to-fake-news-report-finds
The most resilient country against fake news is Finland, followed by Norway and Denmark.
The most susceptible countries towards fake news are Kosovo, North Macedonia and Georgia, all very low income and low literacy countries. So it appears you're right.
The US ranks in the lower third of all countries measured. The US is full of retards.
https://www.usnews.com/news/best-countries/articles/2023-01-27/finland-most-resistant-to-fake-news-report-finds
The most resilient country against fake news is Finland, followed by Norway and Denmark.
The most susceptible countries towards fake news are Kosovo, North Macedonia and Georgia, all very low income and low literacy countries. So it appears you're right.
The US ranks in the lower third of all countries measured. The US is full of retards.
>>290532
its a taboo to say, but the average iq in the states is rapidly dropping due to migrants from low intelligence countries.
you have like 0,1% coming in as programmers or doctors on h1b-visas and 99,9% coming in as green card menial labor types
we arent getting a bunch of highly educated critically thinking people from finland, japan or india's elite.
we are getting people from weird shitholes like malawi, burundi and south american failed states where people can just about scribble their name on a piece of paper
its a taboo to say, but the average iq in the states is rapidly dropping due to migrants from low intelligence countries.
you have like 0,1% coming in as programmers or doctors on h1b-visas and 99,9% coming in as green card menial labor types
we arent getting a bunch of highly educated critically thinking people from finland, japan or india's elite.
we are getting people from weird shitholes like malawi, burundi and south american failed states where people can just about scribble their name on a piece of paper
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