I kicked a lifelong vidya addiction, then replaced it with TV. I stopped smoking weed, now I just chug stupid amounts of kratom and coffee. When I quit an addiction, I always wonder why I bothered quitting.
How do you wizards feel about addiction? What are you addicted to? Are you hedonists and have you accepted that?
Personally, I still feel guilty for playing vidya because my dad used to degrade me constantly for gaming too much when I was younger. I've been depressed since I was about 10 and I rarely had the motivation for other things. Now I'm too depressed for gaming most of the time. When Elden Ring came out, I was almost "happy" for about a month because I had something to look forward to every day when I got home from work. I felt like a degenerate for staying up gaming all night but it was worth it. Now I have nothing to play and it makes me want to die.
I'm addicted to coffee and seriously dependent on bupropion. It sucks to have to rely on one more thing to keep going but it's not that big of a deal, as long as I can keep affording the drugs.
>>203951 The secret to killing an addiction for good is the realisation and acceptance that it is ok to feel shit. This really is the only necessary step to attain genuine manhood. Before this, you're forever stuck in a child's mindframe. It's really as simple as that.
>>205508 >I don't really know what normal people do. Watch TV? How do they fill up the time? There's a considerable amount they spend on social things like texting, calls, social media, friends and the way normies consume media is different because they also usually do it in a socially driven context.
Almost all my mental stimulation is from the internet and I notice how it shaped my perception. Yesterday I was blown away from a moment when I thought about how different life must be for people who get messages and calls from friends and stuff, it feels like they have a different reality around them. I keep forgetting that most people have a life with stuff happening even if it's average and mediocre and most of them would have killed themselves if they would be isolated for that long.
>>205523 It doesn't sound retarded at all. People who want to have fun all the time are stuck with a childish mindset because at some point you have to be able to sustain yourself and that only works with responsibility and an impulse control that a child doesn't have yet.
I am a manchild who can't have a still moment. I need to have coffee or an energy drink in the morning to feel some kind of kick. But then when I finish drinking the energy drink even though I know it will make me feel worse I get some more caffeine to feel another kick. While eating food I have to watch videos and when I am finished eating breakfast/lunch I have to have some kind of sweets and after like an hour of not eating anything I get some snack and I also have to drink soda because water is flavorless. I have this childish attitude where I have to have things to look forward to in a day like drinking an energy drink or ice cream or fast food…
I have to constantly have some kind of background noise so I watch videos even when playing games. In all these years I have not read any books because I can't do that while watching tv and focusing on something is so difficult for me it feels unbearable. I can't even play singleplayer games because I need the constant stimulation of online games.
I am chronically late and skipped school and dropped out of college because I kept skipping lectures because I stayed up late being on my computer and then couldn't handle going to college without getting full 8h+ sleep.
At the core of this is my manchild mentality of not being able to handle feeling bad and not having some kind of reward to look forward to. But I burnt out from instant-gratification because it's not fulfilling but I also can't study anything because being confronted with my lack of knowledge feels bad and seeing the mountain that has to be climbed feels scary.
Obviously the answer is "grow up" but how? It's something I want to do for myself but I feel so weak.
>>203951 >vidya addiction >replaced it with TV This was me back throughout the 2010s. >stopped smoking weed >chug stupid amounts of coffee I've never tried kratom but whenever I quit smoking weed I always drink tons of coffee. Funny how I never need coffee when I have weed though. >What are you addicted to? Browsing imageboards, fapping, saving way too many pointless files from the internet/data hoarding, and pretending to be from another country in my head.
>>205523 You're welcome, wizzo. I wish I'd accepted it sooner - it is my 35th birthday today and I still have plenty to work on…
>>205540 The most fucked up thing is once you climb over the top, you realise there was no mountain in the first place. It's a horrible realisation, that the entire slope was just invented… based on your vision of the past - that somehow the last 3000 days of your habitual behaviour translates somehow to the next 3000. That, in some way, you have to 'undo' what you've done in toto. In reality the slate is cleaned every morning you wake up. It simply doesn't matter. I wish I could impart this realisation to you better, I just don't know how to… It's as if you put on the safety ropes, stretched every muscle in your body with deliberate movements, clenched your grip to the point of cramping for fear of falling back down, and the whole time you were horizontal. All that effort was pointless. There's no effort needed… just fucking change and suffer a bit (barely even suffering anyway). Feeling bad isn't falling. Giving up is falling. Starting again isn't climbing back up. The entire thing is an illusion.
In a sense, if you aren't going for the enjoyment of actual suffering (quite dangerously addictive!) you can think in terms of small wins. It's impossible to say if what works for one person works for another, but the overall technique that worked when I was younger is that you just need to GRADUALLY switch your focus from something to another. It's very very difficult to do this when you have your inner voice nagging you. Don't listen to it, REASON with it. When I was in my mid 20s, with a can of coke I just started drinking it inordinately slowly, and in some way convinced myself that the fewer I drank, the more I appreciated the can that I did. It turned into a more oppulent experience, while simultaneously lower my intake. Quite amazing. I also drank much more tea. I bought a fancy kettle that made it so much more enjoyable to just make the tea, let alone drink it. One of the best purchases I ever made. For smoking I made myself more comfy so that I didn't want to move which reduced my intake, and when I decided to fully quit I 'let myself' do whatever I wanted to ease the unending nagging. I slept for 3 hours more than I wanted, took further naps, binged on snacks, sat in the bath for as long as I felt like. It took a long time, but eventually I didn't even think about smoking anymore, except in negative ways. Then when I wanted to lose 3 stone I just did. Went from 14st to 11st. I focused on my hunger, translating it to the lower number on the scale that I would see the next morning. Sometimes the number stayed the same, but it didn't matter because the day after it would go down even more. It ended up going too far - I got thinner than I actually wanted, but genuinely enjoyed the suffering. It's no pain, it's discomfort which is there for a really good reason. I had no option but to eat more and justify it through exercise. Secondly, don't reflect on days where it made you feel bad, only reflect on the days where it made sense - where you knuckled down, 'suffered' and ended up bigger and better than before. Ruminate on how you're getting better as well. Maybe this is listing how much money you've saved, weight loss, weight gain, easier to breathe or do stuff, whatever quantitative metrics you want to track. You end up turning the whole thing into an RPG, except it's actually meaningful.
The final point I'd add is how this 'masculinity' is so obvious, but somehow completely lost on men across the world. Obviously this is because there's ZERO mainstream media promoting it, and ridicule/suppression of anything that isn't [insert political bent here]. I don't honestly care about the politics of it, only the fact that this concept eludes so many people when it's so built-in to a man's genetic makeup. For example, the endorphines released after you exercise are so obvious and evident, you (I) realise that it's sort of better than the enjoyment a video game gives me. Maybe you have to do it for a little while until you're in the right frame of mind for it to click, but once it does it's honestly quite comical how completely at odds it is with the incessant, meticulous design of our surroundings.
>>205541 Turn it on its head and wear it as a badge of honour. Grow.
>>205505 I've been addicted to porn for over a decade as well and I'm sure it's the one addiction that did the most damage to me besides weed. There's just things that shouldn't exist in a way.
>>205505 >>205506 >>205559 >decade I've been addicted to porn never missing a day of multiple times masturbating for almost 24 years which will be a full 24 years on July 11th at 2:37 PM MST.
I used to fap every day but now I reduced it to once a week simply because I can't find anything good.
I developed very specific preferences and it takes me hours to find just 1 potentially appealing video.
What's infuriating is how shit the search is for porn. For example I like succubi with strong jaws. But literally no one will tag a video with such a specific characteristic. The tags are stupid because "big boobs" doesn't say anything about shape and the tags describing the sexual act are also pointless because it's not the act alone that's hot but the actors/actresses.
I am praying that AI will fix this and be able to analyze videos for specific characteristics like this.
I've never experienced addiction. It seems like some sort of psyop. If you dont want to do something then you wouldn't do it. I don't really understand. I'm over 30 and regularly perplexed by people and their seeming psychosis, how they keep saying that they want to change in a certain way but they simply don't do it.
>>205587 i've tried many hard drugs and I can say the same, I really though I'd get addicted from metamphetamine or other stuff but I just didn't. I took amphetamine for a few months day by day and then just quit it
i smoked daily on and off for years but each time i was able to quit cold turkey without cravings or other signs of addictions. same with vaping. i just consider them luxury activities when i have excess wealth
many people dont even believe porn addiction is a real thing also. it is all kinda nonsense. i use the word broadly to mean something i perceive as unhealthy but cannot stop engaging in it
>>205589 Same. I've used meth, benzos, opiates and enjoyed all of them. But my usage was never an issue. I've barely taken anything now in the last few years.
>>205588 >>205591 Yes even the definition is confusing to me. >unhindered will I don't believe in free will. I am just a puppet reacting based on my childhood, genetics etc. But I don't experience this 'wanting to quit an activity but cant'. I think perhaps people are lying or conflicted about what they really want. At the point where they do the thing they are addicted to, in their mind must… want it and decide to do it? But later they regret it? So it's actually an issue of their state of mind, their desires, being disturbingly unstable? I dont know if this is accurate
I'm starting to realize I was never really "addicted" in the first place. I played lots of vidya when I was a NEET, and sometimes I felt like a degenerate, but when I felt like quitting I did. Same thing with weed. I'm not even sure I would call vidya "addictive". Maybe "compulsive" would be the proper term. Like you feel compelled to play but you can fight the compulsion.
The reason I played so much vidya is because it was more fun than other things. I guess being "addicted" was really just having fun.
>>205537 my life is like yours, isolated. i do get stoned a lot that helps. i have a couple people that i text about gaming and other nerdy stuff but we rarely or never hangout. i useed to have a "normal" life like 10 years ago, but the past 8 years have been like you, dry and with no calls no friends.
>>205591 when i "smoked" for a little bit i realized that i was only addicted to the act of taking out a cig and smoking it, not the nicotine itself. it slowly went awayl.
>>203951 I think all addictions are based on getting the secure and comfy feeling that is lacking otherwise. In this way everyone is an "addict", it's just that they get their fix in different ways. At some point in our lives we come to associate certain activities that naturally give us pleasure with this security and comfort, and if your life is otherwise lacking in this you will turn to this pleasurable activity repeatedly. This is why I think there are just so many addictions out there, from gambling, smoking, alcohol, drugs, prostitutes, videogames, internet, etc. Even though they are all completely different all these addicts describe their need for a fix in the same exact way: an uncontrollable urge and an instant feeling of relief once that urge is acted on. It also describes why people, after quitting one addiction so often either simply find a new one or have to live with an urge to do that activity for the rest of their lives.
So the most honest answer I think if you want to get rid of your addiction is to find another addiction to replace your current one with. Some addictions are clearly more destructive than others. If I had to rank them they would go like:
>>203951 I’m addicted to fast food and it’s entirely my fault. I try to balance it out with constant exercise (1-2 hours a day) but it just equalizes my body. I’m starving right now because I decided to start eating normal person portions today. It’s fucking killing me, I just want to munch on a tasty burger or chicken sandwich. I’m not even too much overweight (under 200 lbs), the only reason I want to curb it is because I know it’s not healthy long term. At the same time, it’s the only thing to bring me guaranteed dopamine hits every day, even when things are shitty. I really might just cave and order some tomorrow.
>>205876 I don't get how some humans are able to get so much dopamine from food. I just eat scrambled eggs and chicken every day, and I never feel such a craving.
Do you fap or take any drug that gives you dopamine?
>>205877 i feel similarly, never cared for food, because of that i've always been very skinny it's been getting worse lately to the point where i don't care enough to cook anything for myself and i do nothing but eat chips, it will probably affect my health
> I kicked a lifelong vidya addiction, then replaced it with TV.
seems like a downgrade, as at least vidya is more active, less passive.
but that reminds me of how much TV dominated my childhood and teens. and how id be at home at 3pM to watch PBS and Nick cartoons, while my peers were out living their soap opera dramas.
but once internet addiction took over, i rarely ever watch tv, except in 5min snippets
>>205843 Sometimes bad, but nowhere near as bad as the other ones. I haven't heard of many smokers, alcoholics, or sex addicts who spent 40 years of their lives living in their parents home without leaving. The story with these is usually "I used to drink so much it interfered with my work and family". The story with the other ones is "I stayed on the computer for most of my 20s and 30s and now I have nothing to show for it and nothing to live for", or "I ruined my relationships with everyone I know because I need to get my next drug fix and I will steal and sell anything that isn't nailed down".
OP you seem to have replaced your addictions with even worse additions.
Like video games are more engaging than passively consuming TV. You replaced weed with poor mans opiates and caffeine (both of which can have bad withdrawals.)
When I think back on my life, my happiest moments were not my "accomplishments." It was the games I played. This fact makes normies and improvebrahs even MORE upset.
>>205956 I don't think it makes anyone upset shen you choose to be a fag but it is rather childish and makes you look like those stereotypical reddit types who make soyfaces on twitter while showing off their game gear.
>>205957 >those stereotypical reddit types who make soyfaces on twitter while showing off their game gear. they do it to get a rise out of idiots like you