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 No.258810[Reply][Last 50 Posts]

Post here when you don't have enough to say for a topic and it's too depressing for the general crawl thread.
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Fighting against nature or hating on it is a waste of time and energy. That poor lion is hungry and he wants to eat. He sees some animal he is supposed to eat, so he kills it and eats it. It's not like he does anything bad morally, he is fighting for his survival. Who are we to judge an animal based on our false and anti-natural and unrealistic moral system??

>there would be no need for human beings to build societies with complex political systems in an attempt of containing the very nature of man, it would be meaningless to create religions that would disguise the reality of life away.

These are unnecessary and meaningless already. Always been that. Most people don't profit from the existence of society significantly. Groups are created in order to ensure that some privileged circles get what they want. It is about the preservation of some dynasties and the well-being of them, not about all of humanity. Of course they made up religions and herd morality to tell us that we need civilization or we would be cruel evil beasts and animals! They make us fear ourselves and our desires. Anything related to egoism is a big no-no in society.

Whether it is a forest fire or a predator devouring a weaker animal, how can it be wrong if it is natural? The problem is with our perception of things, because we were brainwashed by morals and expectations that are completely anti-nature.

About depression, I am pretty sure it is tied to the air of corruption we breath in day after day thanks to our crap culture and society. Change society and many wizards here would be cured of their sorrow and bitterness. Nature is a complex thing, beyond morals. Nature gives us diseases and hunger and pain but it also gives us food, cures and pleasures. Nature whips us one day and kisses us on other days, so to speak. Ultimately we are the products of nature and it is for you to decide what you feel towards it.


Scrolling through Youtube just makes me depressed.

I don't have an account, so all the videos it recommends me are just disgusting normie shit. The comments are also just an insult to injury.


I go through the same thing. I feel like I have to construct my own, personal, weird 'anti-Youtube' by blocking trending and recommended tabs, using weird filters to get search results I actually want, using a fucking list on Notepad to check subscriptions–most days I am beside myself wondering how the fuck people can deal with the website.



I code as a hobby. Once in a while I venture outside my padded room. Out into the social coding world (read: github). Half the time I throw out a random coment on some guys project. I get my head bit off.

One time I extended a random gusy project. And he got all fucking paranoid and immediately changed the license on this repo to an more restrictive one. Like woah dude fucking chill. You left a comment in the code saying "wtf is this" and I was like, hey this actually means such and such. And his reaction was immediate schizo mode.

Whatever. He forked that from an abandon project himself anyways and tried to take ownership as if it's his work. Fucking retard. I dialed back to the fork point and wrote my own implementation to the original code base.

I don't understand why people share their code publicly and act so hostile. What gets me is the guys whose social coding accounts are same as their professional work identities.

Is that how professional coders are. I mean how many dicks do I have to suck to get a coding job but these guys professional profiles are asshole mode.

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if i dont sleep at least 6-7 hours a night i cant function properly the next day
i get brainfog, my vision becomes blurry and i struggle doing basic tasks

i also wake up really easily from the slightest sound and even if theres no sound i always wake up in my sleep


Its good to be a light sleeper like that


its the worst actually


Same, but make it 8-9 hours plus naps in the middle of the day. But I can be super productive when awake and rested so I don't mind it.

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 No.249297[Reply][Last 50 Posts]

I am killing myself within the next month

How can I ensure that I will go to heaven when I die? I haven't been to church since childhood and I am a bad person.
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They have infested imageboards for almost the past decade by now. Most of them are only Christian because of imageboard contrarianism, and they needed a new way to be pretentious when most internet nerds were atheist.


>Most of them are only Christian because of imageboard contrarianism
Yup. It's pretty gay, to be honest.


Go to China or the jungle in South America. There's no hell for them there.


If you commit suicìde you may not go to jannah but hell instead. Confess your sins to God or to a priest. Live your life in peace or maybe devote yourself to helping people.


How about no?

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screwing up your own life is not that bad. because at least you were in control. i, for the most part, made all the right decisions and put in the effort. but i was sabotaged, and there is really nothing i can do now. the opportunities were only available for a short amount of time and it’ll never be the same again. i have become dumber, uglier and i’m not really good at anything relevant anymore. and it’s not even my fault.
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let me guess, you're some baby in his early 20s that didn't go to college or kiss a gurl in high school so you're just going to spend the next 50 years of your life pretending you missed some once in a lifetime opportunity and it's all over now? that's gonna be a fun life lol


You were never in control. Nobody is at fault.

Your great-grandfather fucked up your grandfather, your grandfather fucked up your father, your father fucked you up…


Made me laugh because this is true for many of the users here.


I think I suffer from cognitive dissonance because some days I refuse to see that I'm a loser until somebody disrespects me once again leading to a breakdown.
Nobody respects me.
Weak body, dumb brain, ugly face and hair, no talents, no wealth. I must accept this to prevent excessive stress.


But they're Totally Wizards

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angry and annoyed edition

previous >>256413
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I had my first interview last month. I got ghosted after it. This was after the introduction interview and technical interview.

The question that caught me off guard was “what are you non technical hobbies?”. I didn’t know what to say. I spent 70% of my day on my PC. Other 30% sleeping. I was gonna say exercise but realized how unfit I am. Then just said reading books.


What was the job?


It was a web developer internship. I don’t have anything on my resume for the last 4 years so I think that’s why no one want to give me a chance. But I don’t know why they would bring me to the final interview.


working is better for me than sitting around doing nothing. Its going to suck either way so might as well get paid.


not him but some people just realize life is pointless and they have no goals so why even be alive. its all so dumb.

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I have been a neet for a few years post college due to jobs falling through and being a undiagnosed sperg at the time I lost it. I am trying to reintegrate into society. The problem lies in people's perception of me being a neet I am looked at like a piece of shit on their shoe discreded for just having had a bad time. Why are we not all allowed some time out ? I am trying to get back into social circles and hobbies but it's laterally fucking impossible if you don't lie. i really don't want to keep talking to people as my main source of friendship it is limited what should I do / thoughts ?
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What? Do you expect having friends during neeting? The most basic thing if you want friends: get a job; I mean, neeting you have worsen problems than being friendless. A fair point, if your parents are riches or your family has some money, it's acceptable being neet, but only because you have money; the another case is being ultra normalfag having skate and weed friends, but both still look down at you. Anyway, the last case is having online friends, but you need pretend to work, like only being online after work hours in working days, sleeping early because you need to work, but being free in off-days and weekends.


I avoid conversations as much as possible because the first thing everyone ask you is "What do you do?" It's so annoying.


This. It's always where do you work, do you have kids, do you have a girlfriend blah blah blah so goddamn banal and mundane


I like to test them by answering their question as quickly as possible, and then moving into "Where do you get your ideas from?"


It's really not possible without lying which might be a hard thing to do if you're autistic or have no social skills in general.

If you want to interact with people you can't be honest about anything related to mental health because it will always tell people to keep you at a distance.

If you are on neetbux or autismbux you're gonna have to lie about that as well because otherwise it will give away too much negative personal information such as your mental health or finances and on top of that most people will think you're a leech, you're just gonna always look bad.

Getting back into society seems only possible if you're able to have your shit together enough in order to work or do some self-employed stuff, you gotta be on your feet an not just be some person who doesn't do anything valuable. People don't really give a shit about anything you do but the whole work and employment topic is a way to gather essential social information.

If you are just an unemployed loner with autism you are never gonna be able to get to know any mentally functioning people who are not bums, criminals or anti-social assholes who try to use you. All of this is even worse if you struggle at social interactions or don't have an interesting personality.

There are negative things that are only acceptable if certain people do them, a succubus could have any mental health issue and still find at least a few men willing to take care of her and people would still want to socially interact with her. A man is only allowed to be "mental" or depressed if he's socially skilled or good looking enough to be perceived as interesting.

People really don't care about your opinions, what you think in your free time or how smart you are or what's going on inside you in general (unless they are really close people which hardly ever exist), they can only go with how they perceive you and even if you were an interesting guy you'd still look weird for being unemployed for that long because its just a mayor indicator that you don't have your shit together.

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 No.259130[Reply][Last 50 Posts]

For a lot of people, the reason they didn't kill themselves yet, is because of family. They are scared that their parents will find their dead body. But that is not the case for me. You know if that will happen with me, then I will for a fact my mother would most likely try to kill herself, because she only has me. And yet she doesn't treat me well for a person that is supposed to love me that much. Anyways, I am not afraid of that, I am afraid of hell. Because it really doesn't matter what religion anyone is, no religion permits someone to take their life. In my case I would say I am somewhat of a christian, but I'm not sure anymore. But hell is just terrifying, I wish I could be an atheist and just kill myself, but I simply can't. Something in head is stopping me from just simply not believing. So my question is, if anyone here had these types of thoughts before like me?
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Don't worry God has a sense of humor, and sends all theists to hell, and all atheists to heaven


>n-no, life really is a game and u r a communist cos… well cos i say so ok??? also i am very smart+handsum+i own 2 lambos
You're so very intelligent that you think stomping your feet and repeatedly insisting that life reflect your retarded view of it has any real impact. You really do come across as ESL and senile and retarded given how frequently you rely on heroically defeating a strawman (or repeating the same dumb assertion against all reason), though your responses are so rife with this clueless drivel that it must be willful misinterpretation.
The empty posturing is cute. I love imagining my little monkey man (emphasis on little) composing some new rhetorical feces about its delusions of grandeur, like it's trying to convince itself more than anybody else of how great it is and how it will be able to think about bananas and peanuts for all eternity. For how much of an ubermensch you supposedly are, it really appears you will never be more than an autistic tyrant of a handful of remote threads in the backwoods of the internet.
Ironically, you much more closely resemble one of those "lesser" animals with your unfounded self-assurance than any hedonist or pessimist ever could. Really, you should be charging anyone caught within the vicinity of your farts, because clearly your gut has the most immaculate bacteria. They can't just imbibe that gaseous gold for free. Well, I'm afraid I must hold my nose and leave the room because I'm a meek little communist baby and I don't want to incur your wrath by robbing you of your very masculine, very mature and very wise "insights." Have fun hitting a new hi-score on rocks counted in a day or something.


That is it, just run back to mommy because some wizard didn't agree with you on the internet. Sorry but this site isn't your personal echo chamber.
>autistic tyrant
Thanks for the compliment! Really. You are like normals when they can't come up with any arguments so they start insulting people like me. "You are totally weird!" or "Bro you a virgin or something?" But like I said, I learned to view these insults against my personality and character as compliments.

You aren't original at all, by the way. I argued with countless pessimists like you on the internet and you all repeat the same arguments ad infinitum.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts though. Another epic win for me. Nowadays people can't keep up with my passion and force and they always surrender to me in debates. Huh, I am so good.


Disagreement is fine. It's not like I reported you. I'm just reminding you that being a huge retard and talking in circles until everyone loses interest in the conversation isn't impressive to anyone but yourself. So, uh, have fun with being a petulant idiot or whatever.

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 No.254285[Reply][Last 50 Posts]

How easy would it be to overdose on fentanyl or carfentanyl?

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>the same people posting about it but never actually going through

A few wizards have already done it and have been in the news for it.


Probably both. The same people post about it year after year, but incrementally one after the other does it.

>So an 8 foot rope will be an 8 foot drop

It will be 8 foot from where it's supported to your neck. If you drop down 8 feet from where it's tied and the ground is 8 feet below where it's tied, you'll just hit the ground. Always take into consideration your own height.


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jumping from a skyscraper seems like an obvious method in the city, but im not sure about the logistics of it

can you ask a hotel for the top floor? will the windows open?

or what this guy did


I've worked construction and been on many roofs. On office buildings and hotels the actual access to the roof is on the stairwell, and is only a thin door, often just held close with a bolt and padlock. You could walk in with an axe in a duffle bag and simply smash the door open.

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Thread for psychotic depression and other psychotic disorders

Had depression for most of my life since elementary, turned psychotic about a year ago. Spiders, voices, etc. Lost all of people I talked to because of it. However the psychosis went away sometime last year, maybe November.

As of late, have had major emotional problems that lead to fantasies of self mutilation. Keep getting worse every day and now hallucinations are occurring and emotions are array. Feelings of derealization and extreme worthlessness. Afraid that I might go into a deep psychosis. It all started with being a bit emotional since 2 months ago and now it's ending up with this.

If anyone else has had psychosis before or thinks they may be slipping into it as well, then post here

Meds are Risperidone, Lexapro and Gabapentin.
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Actually it's completely the opposite. I was institutionalized before, in a mental ward against my will, and I was prescribed heavy doses of anti-psychotics, SSRIs, and benzos. I was getting handfuls of pills down my throat like I was a lab rat. I'll tell you, pharmaceuticals are just an elaborate scam to make money. Since then I stopped using medication and realized that the "cure" is in yourself and coming to terms with your reality. The institutional thing to do is to numb yourself so severely to yourself and others around you that you become a psychopath and only end up caring about yourself. As a side note, what I wrote above is what works for me. In the end you have to explore yourself internally to figure out how you deal with your shit, which is what I meant when I said psychoanalysis helped me. I never saw a shrink, I just studied books and drew my own conclusions after being introduced to the subject. With the thread topic, I'd recommend reading up on the process of neurosis/psychosis starting with Freud then Lacan. I should also suggest that you doubt every idea they pronounce, and that goes for everything in psychoanalysis. Question every facet of it until you determine whether you actually believe it or not, because to be honest a lot of it is bullshit if you take it a face value and don't analyze it critically.


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One thing that Freud said that I found very insightful was this: "Religion is the universal obsessional neurosis of humanity. Like the obsessional neurosis of children, it arose out of the Oedipus Complex, out of the relation to the father. Our God, reason, will fulfill whichever of our wishes nature outside us loves." So asides from being like the prototypical crackhead, he had some cool ideas.


I'm chronically psychotic on the schizophrenia spectrum. I take 5mg Zyprexa another 5mg at noon if i'm at work, i also take Cymbalta.
On off days i do drugs that are downers only because stims make me psychotic.


that's only cool to a reddit atheist though


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I like this thread. I don't want it to die so soon.

I was diagnosed schizoaffective some years back and was put on Abilify, along with the few antidepressants I was taking before like Zoloft and Wellbutrin. Really all it is is manic depression except those periods where you're supposed to be happy are replaced with psychosis. Maybe I should take it as a miracle I have periods where I'm somewhat lucid, like now, but at the same time I almost wish I was completely out of it so I wouldn't have to think about how the next episode is going to be. Voices are the worst.

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Hell exists and we're already living in it. Our universe already permits unlimited suffering through the propagation of life.

As for life after your life in this hell, there is none. Death is the escape from this hell world.

Life itself is the propagator of hell. Without life, there is no hell. Once your destroy the brain and the evolutionary process, hell ceases to exist.

Hell, pain and suffering, are natural phenomenon associated with the process of the evolution of life, as those who experienced pain and suffering were the ones who survived and reproduced, therefore furthering the process of biological evolution and hell.

Destroy life and you destroy hell. All manifestations of hell are all projections of the suffering and pain already found in our own universe, our own hell. Combine all the suffering on Earth and within the universe and you have the equivalent suffering of one person burning in hell for eternity.

Maybe the universe is eternal and all life, suffering and pain is eternal as well. Could this not be defined as hell?
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>except end of all life.No ideology, no religion could end the suffering, evil, cruelty and lies in this world except end of all the life and no one could tell anything otherwise

OK, why don't you guys show us good example and live according to what you preach? I am waiting…

I learned much more from my sufferings and bad times than from pleasures and good times. And excessive pity and compassion is harmful, it creates a society of weak individuals incapable of survival…which is just what you "good" people and "friends" of humanity and every living thing desire. Indeed, there is no more toxic ideology than the ideology to reduce suffering at any cost for every living thing.

In your quest to feel for every stray puppy, starving orphan or raped wyman you forgot how to live and how to enjoy life. You forgot, if you permit the joke, how to be yourself. You take no joy from existence and you disguise your bitterness and envy with the mask of compassion and empathy. "If I find life to have no value then nobody is allowed to find value in it!" - reasons the Cosmic Messiah wannabe. And he goes around trying to drag others down into his little dark pond of envy and resentment.


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>I learned much more from my sufferings and bad times than from pleasures and good times.
that's because you're a birb, but most people in our time suffer pointlessly, and it's not so much pain itself but the emptiness of the pain that drives people mad. what you're proposing can only be sustained by a minority of bright spirits for now. do you think this is too soft?


The "Minority of bright spirits" should extend their influence. If we continue as we are then society will collapse because the majority of people lost all their endurance and faith in life (even if they don't say it out loud). Our culture grew extremely weak thanks to hedonism, pessimism, humanism, pacifism and mainstream religions.

No wonder though, since all of our political and religious leaders in the West are pathetic dumb slaves enslaved to either chasing pleasure after pleasure or living up to some currently cool and trendy ideology. It is all about pleasing the average normal now. By average normal I mean both progressives and conservatives. There are no knights, no warrior-castes, no actual free thinkers and no creative/original artists, no priests who teach like they have power.

But it is all right. The cycle of this period is almost over I think. Something new is about to begin. Maybe something better.


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yes, i'm very optimistic about that

one way of reconciling what you rightfully raise with a new compassion is for the warrior-aristocracy not to act out of pity or piety, but to act from their overflowing generosity like the sun: what's good and bad (noble and ignoble) is whatever their light throws into shade

it's harder to write about priests because they are more mercurial, but there's nothing necessarily wrong with them being nihilists, pacifists, comically austere, or just lazy, because they are peculiarly constituted to synthesize all the infirmities, death, and sickness people experience (hopefully) towards happiness, but priests can often be trouble


I like your style. Who are your favorite authors or writers or where you take your ideas from? I think we are both inspired by Nietzsche but who else do you like? Or is it purely your own philosophy?

What do you think the role of wizards could be in a new, better society? I think "secular monasteries" could be an actual thing where young boys are taken and they are educated by wizards or wizardly types there to adopt a manly mindset towards life. Or just pulling the strings behind the scenes from our ivory tower would be nice.

Damn, I hate our society so much. It could be so much better, manlier and…cooler, I guess? Instead we are going downwards, getting sucked into the spiral of blind humanism.

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