/dep/ - Depression

>>305069
if you're old it's beard time

how do i live with norwood 3 at fucking 20 man. i just can't. nobody my age liked me anyways but this is making things so much worse. i can't look into the mirror without crying every time.
i can't grow a beard. i can't ever imagine myself bald. i have no money for transplants. and even if i had it, with how i can't even manage going outside without wanting to die so flying somewhere where those are cheap seems almost impossible.
what do i do? how do i cope?

>>305196
Never leave your room again.

>>305198
lmao. akhchually employers barely care and succubi… why do you even bother about your hairline unless you plan of having s*x?

>>305199
>why do you even bother about your hairline unless you plan of having s*x?
it makes simply interacting with others insanely stressful and scary. Anything that requires me to go outside and especially formal settings where covering your head is not an option seems impossible to me. there are other reasons why i am like this but realizing how fucked my hair is really made it 100 times worse.

>>305184
Sertraline, a medication that helps control my PTSD, is something I genuinely cannot live without. It gives me back a sense of sanity that I once lost, and it allows me to feel grounded in my own mind again. Before I had it, my thoughts felt chaotic and overwhelming, like I was constantly being pulled in a dozen painful directions at once. With sertraline, that noise quiets down, and I can finally breathe. It does not erase my past or pretend that my trauma never happened, but it gives me the emotional stability to face life without being crushed by it. In that way, it does not just make me feel better, it gives me the ability to function, to feel hopeful, and to experience moments of happiness that once felt completely out of reach.

The people around me noticed the difference even before I fully did. They told me that before sertraline, I was often angry, tense, and filled with resentment, not because I wanted to be, but because I was constantly in survival mode. I was lashing out at the world and at myself, trapped in a state of emotional pain that I did not know how to escape. Now, they say I am calmer, more patient, and more like the person I was always meant to be. That change feels real to me too, like I have been given a second chance to live instead of just endure. Sertraline did not change who I am at my core, but it gave me the stability I needed to finally be myself again.

>>305197
Medicine is just another form of technology, and humans have always relied on technology to survive and thrive. From the first stone tools to modern computers, every step of human progress has been built on creating things that extend our natural limits. We do not shame people for using glasses to see, insulin to regulate blood sugar, or prosthetics to walk, because we understand those tools restore basic function and quality of life. In the same way, psychiatric medication is a tool that helps the brain function in a healthier, more stable way. The brain is a biological organ, just like the heart or lungs, and when it struggles, it makes sense to use the best tools available to support it. Calling medicine unnatural ignores the reality that nearly everything that keeps us alive and comfortable today is the result of human innovation layered on top of biology.

What makes the stigma around mental health medication especially painful is that it treats suffering as if it were a personal failure rather than a medical condition. People are told that needing antidepressants or anti anxiety medication means they are weak, dependent, or not truly healing, simply because the help comes in the form of a pill. That attitude erases how real and debilitating mental illness can be, especially for people who have lived through trauma and developed conditions like PTSD. When a medication helps someone regain emotional balance, think clearly, and feel safe in their own mind again, that is no different from a medical device helping someone breathe or move. Dismissing that relief as artificial only adds shame on top of pain, and it ignores the simple truth that technology, including medicine, has always been one of humanity’s greatest tools for staying alive and finding a better life.

>>305202
>People are told that needing antidepressants or anti anxiety medication means they are weak, dependent, or not truly healing


by trolls who seek self-validation just like most online trolls do so by belittling a very vulnerable person.

>>305197
What pills?
Yes. Those pills aren't just for you, they are for that hard-working economy-moving guy you may whack instead of yourself

>>305201
>The people around me noticed the difference even before I fully did. They told me that before sertraline, I was often angry, tense, and filled with resentment

ugh… in my school, they found these very traits in me only to say "yes you say they make fun of you, but what about you? Fists clenched, eyes full of hate, maybe you should do something with yourself"

Ugh. Good riddance.

>>305176
No I have no formal diagnosis and…
…I am too afraid of misdiagnosis



I swear, it's a double whammy.

My family: cold person, hateful person, certified SCH person, an already fading doing-nothing telly-watching person

My classmates:
L I V E L Y

B U S T E R S

My pain: I never really had this "lively buster" attitude myself so other being little busters of their age to me was being misinterpreted by me as a conspiracy-like hate against me.

See, my classmates used to… well, play obnoxious games with me and then they were all surprised I am not a big fan of games acting all serious and stuff. They WOULD NOT LEAVE ME ALONE.

And then, once I complained how I cannot handle it they were all like "but it's all about you, your fists are clenched…" yes, they said tgat. Shit. No one was vigilant enough to investigate how contrasting MY life was to THEIRS.
Post too long. Click here to view the full text.

at least you have an obvious excuse on why you didn’t do anything with your life. No one is going to question a disabled person for not getting a job and following the normie path in life. It’s much harder for people who don’t have an excuse and still reject that meaningless waste of time known as job/family

>>305205
I have considered getting a job before just to distract my self.

Not OP, but I cried this night for a similar reason: my mind refuses to believe I was raised/fed/clothed because my parents loved me. No. I always asked them what profession do I have to master and they never told me.




See, I always expected my parents to have a career prospect for me. Then, they both were avoiding the question as if I was either trolling them, not raising a serious topic OR have failed them so hard the career prospect they had for me is out of the question forever.

It hurts.
I was ready in my teens to take whatever role they had for me - and they had none. "SONNY, IT'S YOUR LIFE" - that's not love, that's negligence, am I right?

I swear it feels like I am a failure I am being lied at "to not hurt my feelings".


Honestly, this is a very painful realization they ruined my career life over some dumb idea of "freedom of choosing" as in making me as career-blind as possible.

>>305208
the worst thing is, I like my job, but the past… The past hurts a lot.

5. It sounds counterintuitive, but you can fight internet addiction and device addiction with a device.

Put some cool stuff on your old smartphone (without cellular internet, that's important! without viable browsers also)

Browser your faves before sleep, +1 to comfyness without the desire to "lurk more".

I just ordered an electric blanket. I wake up each morning and I am cold. I think it's because I drink a lot of water in the morning, but even when I try to slow down my rehydration it seems like I get cold. I lay under 4 layers of blankets and feel like I am not warming up at all.

>>304554
>I just ordered an electric blanket.
Good, good! I expect it to help you MASSIVELY.

Got myself a beautiful blanket
Cons: it's too hot for my room!
Pros: Maybe, I will use it in the spring, when they shut the central heating off. It feels so warm it could go well with a chilly room

>>304474
Makeshift humidifier fr tower block dwellers.

Just take your old, perforated shirt from your old clothing chache…

pour lot of water on it

and put the resulting wet rag on your heat radiator.

Boom. My sleep has been alright this night - unlike my past night

That's the normal state of humanity. Also did you imply that you are on
>multiple drugs and getting therapy?
Because if so good luck waiting until your life improves.

If you've been keeping up with normies the last 10 years have culled them. let's say if 80% of people were normies in 2005, now it's barely 50%. The rest are now failed-normies or whatever term you want to use. Most people are isolated or turned crazy

>>304672
>"nah" followed by a bunch of 'wrong on purpose' low-effort trolling
Still? After all of these years?

>>304676

EDITED
Makes some sense, m8

Makes some sense.. "Normies" hate what confuses them and what they don't seem to understand. Something something herd mentality.

>>304678
point taken, but this one has "a troll being itself" vibe: Comrade Troll decided to tell us controlling own emotions = good (as long as it can help us gain some control over our lives)

I understood there are many things my parents did not do right and if I were to have kids I would like to think I know what to do better.

NOT OP, BUT…


BUMP


Ive been thinking lately about the DRAMA in my life. Apparently, some succ next door either have seduced my father or have successfully faked such a thing - for "some" drama which led to a painful divorce. (Or maybe my mother is not a reliable storyteller…)


Now, my whole life is wizardchan-tier simply because some rural-to-city

>>305179
>Now, my whole life is wizardchan-tier simply because some rural-to-city

hedonistic succubus wanted to satisfy her hedonistic desires by provoking my mother to divorce and to away + grab me too = ahaha a young big guy to do stuff with.


Oh, and *her* husband was so frail he… passed away ~10 years ago; go figure.

you should look up guro if you want to satisfy this desire even more

It's a fun way to vent. I made a comic series albeit quite bad about an outcast wagie. Not entirely original but I get to plagiarize my real life experiences

>>304421
>Hatred through art
>Knowing the hedonist succubi stroll
>was eating away at me so I drew for a bit in an attempt to extend my range of patience.
>I think I'm in a spot right now where I feel neutral
>but that can't stop me from knowing how disgusting and vile they are, and how even just existing is
Sound like a crabdom with a succubi rent free 24/7 in the head.

I like drawing cute lolis and chibis sometimes (not in a sexually way you know) so i dont have a problem with that. so it can fullfiling just learning to draw or do emotion in arts.
>Also
At this point Crabdom gonna be normal in this place… fuck.

>>304492
>Sound like a crabdom with a succubi rent free 24/7 in the head

OR, his cozy life was ruined because some succubus have either seduced OPs father leading to a divorce


Or didn't seduce, I dunno.

I remember being made to read a book about Soviet refugees that escaped the gulag. And later in life in New Zealand they weren't really any better off for it. They just worked the lowest of wagecuck jobs, were sorta socially isolated and did weird things like hoard bread crusts in their drawer. The US soldiers that escorted them to the country were commenting on how they just seemed lifeless and distrusting, emotionless even as they were given candy and sweets.

There was a guy at my old job who was completely normal until a group of guys kidnapped him and locked him under a carpit for several days. He almost died of dehydration. He came out of that a barely functioning alcoholic that would melt down when anyone would yell at him. He was constantly the victim of confidence tricks.

what about all the ones who kill themselves, "builds character" lmao

I have actually come to the opposite conclusion that I need to be in a good mood to be productive and resilient towards life's problems. I still think the zone of optimal development thing is the best explanation. People need to suffer but only as much as they can handle and too much or too little is not good. The improvebrahs can romanticize suffering because their actual life is comfortable so more suffering will push them to grow. People like us don't need any more suffering. We should first try to feel better first before we can grow.

>Struggle can force growth when there’s support, safety, and room to process what happened.
Yeah isn't good support network the number one variable inversely related to mental illness or something? No meds or therapy exists for having a shit life lmao.

Same normalfags think bullying builds character too and doesn't just break people and turn them into hollow shells.

>>305145
Ah, *that* kind of character - Goethe's Werter character!


nah, i'd go f

I used to be really suicidal, and maybe I still am in some quiet, lingering way. What keeps me moving forward is this idea of the technological singularity, a future where everything changes so radically that the pain of now might finally lose its grip. I am not clinging to a person or a belief system so much as a horizon, a point in time where the rules of living could be rewritten.

I hold onto the hope that if I live long enough, full dive virtual reality will exist, and I will be able to step into a paradise that feels as real as this world but without its weight. That imagined place is not just escapism, it is a promise that there might be a version of life that does not hurt so much. Even if it is only a dream right now, it gives me a reason to keep breathing and to keep going one more day.

>>296511
dying and suffering in agony is so lonely. i have few days to do it at most and i still have no clue how to defeat SI despite my life being over for a long time. wish i didn't care about anything and was normal about it like everyone else who just kills themselves cause they failed a college exam. i want to just walk out of here and not see or hear anyone from my family ever. i'm dying from endless diseases, have drug-induced dementia and i'll run out of drugs and get seizures or strokes in a day or two. anyway, my method is and always will be train since i have no home or even room to myself, so i cant do anything at home and im a tard that would fuck up every method that required caoabilities. doesnt get easier than walking in front of a train, im just a coward and ill never change. if i wont do it ill end up in prison mental ward hospital in a loop till im 100 years old or die earlier.

>>305149
Now that's a Socratic thought indeed.

>>305165
>wish i didn't care about anything and was normal about it like everyone else who just kills themselves cause they failed a college exam
Does that really happen?
t. highschool dropout

>>305174
Yeah. Though I don't know why you both belittle those people. If the college was their only chance to not live a worthless subhuman life, it's perfectly sensible to suicide.