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 No.307210[Reply][Last 50 Posts]

Post here if you don't have enough to say for a new thread, but it's too depressing for the crawl thread.

Previous:
>>306157
171 posts and 22 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.307688

>>307687
hell is like that

 No.307715

somehow I became schizophrenic in my 30s. Why does this shit only happen to me? Yeah schizophrenia affects others but I had to be a miserable depressed NEET on top of it.

So many fucked up things happen to me if I list them all it sounds like I'm joking around. I have to mention each of them in different posts or It sounds absurd.

 No.307716

>>307715
The funny thing about life is it's completely unbelievable unless it happened to you

 No.307735

>start a video game
>be completely exhausted and mind fogged after 5 minutes
There's nothing left to do, it's just over.

 No.307737

>>307735
this is so relatable lol


[Last 50 Posts]

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 No.307723[Reply]

Very late 20s. Never been on a date, never been approached. Never had any friends, only acquaintances. Not even meme internet "friends". I always thought these things would naturally come to me at a later age, but they never did. With each passing year it gets worse. There is something profoundly wrong with me, it's like the part of my brain that's responsible for human contact was amputated at birth
2 posts and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.307726


 No.307729

>>307723
>it's like the part of my brain that's responsible for human contact was amputated at birth

no, it just never developed and after a certain age, the brain just calcifies and you can't change it. we're fundamentally victims of poverty, not of money or resources, but experiences. if you don't have the right experiences by a certain age, it's over, it doesn't matter if you have it later or 100x stronger, it will barely register compared to when you were young. that's why the cope of "oh but you're only 20 years old, you have your whole life ahead of you" is so laughable.

even if someone gave me friends and a gf on a silver plater, i wouldn't know what to do with them, i would feel nothing. the part of my brain responsible for social contact is permastuck in arrested development.

 No.307731

>>307723
>I always thought these things would naturally come to me
why would they? you only get friends and girlfriends if you have something to offer.
like you want internet friends then its more likely they will befriend you if you are good at the game or you are entertaining to talk to.
if you dont have that nobody is ever gonna send you a friend request ever.
same with succubi, they want a guy who looks healthy and like he has his shit figured out and has stuff going for him.
like hes entertaining, knows how to fuck, has money to spend and will keep the roastie happy by playing along in her bullshit and in exchange he gets sex and companionship.
as soon as the guy cant provide any of these things to people they will abandon him and dump him for someone who does.
and friendships and relationships dont last forever anyway, they are things you constantly have to work on. if you dont they dry up like plants and die off.

 No.307734

I agree with the posters above. Even if you would suddenly get the opportunity to have these things - friends, gf, positive informal social contact - it would be s burden and you could barely appreciate it because it gives you so much worry, pressure, exposition. You would always have to worry about keeping the friend, about entertaining them and doing everything correct, going to an invitation even when you don't want to, be careful about what you say, help them whilst you can't simply expect them to help you especially if you haven't been friends for a long time and when they have a much richer and more successful social life so it wouldn't hurt them if they dropped you while you would be dependent on them and sacrifice a lot more just to keep in touch. Think about whether that's really worth it and try to appreciate the freedom of being alone. Social connections only are worth it if you have a network of people and of you are not dependent on single persons, and also the people that grow up like that have experience for how this works for 20-30 years so it's easy for them almost automatic, they know how to deal with these things by instinct. While for you it would take all your mental emotional psychological resources to start and maintain a relation and you would again think about it and worry too much, it would be much more exhausting.

 No.307736

>>307723
There's a reason the 25+ threads started at 25.

Once you reach 30-35, this is where you do damage control so the later years of your life aren't stressful. This place has been running low on wizards for some time but the thing you seldom hear is life is hard on your own *if* you don't take of yourself before you reach that age and don't have things tailored to living on your own.



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 No.307689[Reply]

I am losing my motivation im gonna fail out of Uni
I dont really want to quit, but I have less and less energy
I am in a state of constant burnout despite doing nearly nothing
im such a failure
11 posts and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.307712

>>307704
Damn gonna start doing math

 No.307727

File: 1778563886907.png (1.15 MB, 1239x1758, 413:586, mathematics is not worthwh….png) ImgOps iqdb


 No.307728

>>307708
Yes I have. I order it from India. It's the single best nootropic I've tried for when I want to study/read something. Although I only take it during fall and winter since it makes my allergies worse.

 No.307732

>>307728
Have you never tried any stronger stimulants? Modafinil is pretty weak in my opinion, I had energy issues like the OP when I was in university and only managed to finish it on stronger stims like Ritalin and it's RC variants. If it's the first thing you ever take it will probably be god tier like that but I would recommend something stronger for somebody in OP's position for sure.

>>307711
>>307689
Which ones did you try? And the effect gets stronger with higher doses, not lower doses. Ritalin and 4F-MPH are the sole reason I was able to finish my university degree despite having a severe lack of energy due to my sleep apnea.
I would recommend you to go visit a doctor if you are constantly fatigued, you are most likely experiencing some medical issue, but in the mean time the right stimulants might be able to keep you functioning.

>>307710
Sadly, some people just need to take them to keep functioning in this gay society. It's not ideal but they can seriously save your life. I would rather achieve something with the help of jewpills than dissapointing myself and everybody who cares about me to stay sober.

 No.307733

>>307711
Also, one more thing, are you motivated to finish your courses and where did you take those stimulants?
I used to take them in a bathroom stall while at my university's library, and then immediately go sit in the library to do all my coursework / assignments. I found that taking them like that helped me be way more productive since if you're at school you're gonna already be in the right mindset to work on things. Stimulants don't really help that much with motivation in my experience so you gotta be smart with your situation around it. If you take them at home it'll be easy to just jack off and play videogames the whole time, even if you do have the energy to do your schoolwork.
Going out to a public spot where you can do your school stuff without too much disturbance can help even without the stimulants. You should try it some time.



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 No.307650[Reply]

I have become increasingly depressed at the state of discourse about almost any subject. Look at the opinions of most people and discuss their reasoning with them; they do not really have reasons based on experience or logic. They are just saying things they think are normal to say. They imitate others. They understand the world through memes. Zero actual curiosity or critical thinking skills when it comes to discussion of politics/culture/history/science/art. Everyone just parrots what they think others think. They think in memes. Partly to fit in and achieve social acceptance and partly just monkey see monkey do like a child or animal.

Democracy is a failure because most people have no idea what they are voting for or what the consequences will be. They just follow the cultural memes. The internet has exacerbated this. Most people’s political views or views on the culture are just glorified SIX SEVEN repetitions - people have no good justification for any of the ideas they follow.

It might sound arrogant and supercilious to say these things. I worry that I am not that different and I just copy things sometimes by instinct. Makes me wonder if the self even fucking exists and we are just biological self replicating robots copying things.

Depressing. Enraging.

 No.307651

it's true, but it's worse than you think. most "people" aren't even human, they're bio-robots that react as if they have inner experience but there's nothing there actually. they're part of a hivemind and most of the time they're in idle mode where they just sync up on memes, but sometimes they operate as a unified whole and cause wars and revolutions. i don't know who or what controls them but ever so often it happens and the results are disastrous.

a good litmus test for whether you are dealing with a conscious human is any signs of internal conflict and "neuroticism". this implies that the body and mind (soul) are separate and want to go in different directions. the zombies on the other hand, operate in reality with zero friction because they have no soul and it is trivial to adapt themselves to any arbitrary conditions that they might find themselves in.

 No.307655

>>307651
Okay, and this changes things how? You don't mistreat animals just because they're animals either.

 No.307668

I think the same. Memes have changed people's way of thinking. Memes make people take things less seriously

 No.307693

All opinions I pay attention too on social media are recycled after another following the same cliche meme-pattern.

 No.307730

I agree



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 No.307519[Reply]

i'm 37 (soon to be 38). watching as your body degrades in real time is debilitating. earthly life is evil in every aspect.
9 posts and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.307576

>>307575
Torturing consciousness is a replicable, scientifically demonstrable, evil deed

 No.307578

>>307575
Go back to reddit, godless abomination.

 No.307579

>>307576
>Torturing consciousness
No such thing. Plenty of wizards happily.

>science

A human construct based on blind faith in axioms.

>>307578
Lol

 No.307721

>>307575
If you start thinking like this then all human ideas like physics, evolution, atheism are just human constructs not independent of mind.

 No.307722

i for one feel good because i eat raw plants and call your food candy, i exercise, i skate, i meditate, i sunbathe, i read, i build my own furniture. while you suffer i am mildly optimistic. being healthy is worth it, your mouthpleasure can't compare to loving your body and it loving you back.

my body is literally a machine that loves me and i take good care of it.

also just stop being depressed, it's possible once you stop insisting on it so hard.



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 No.302164[Reply]

Does anyone here struggle with alcohol, or have managed to quit?

It used to be a good coping mechanism for me, but it seems the older I've gotten the worse it feels, and it's become detrimental to my health and the way I behave around people. Easily annoyed, constantly starting shit, tired all the time, strange pains. And I was still getting worse, fast.

This has been a wake-up call and I'm realizing I need to quit before it's too late. Though that's easy for me to say now when I'm still feeling bad, and I fear the cravings will come back strong, but I know I've got to try.

Curious to hear others experience with this.
63 posts and 3 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.307427

>>307425
It's impossible to fry dopamine unless
>However, high-dose amphetamine can cause indirect neurotoxicity as a result of increased oxidative stress from reactive oxygen species and autoxidation of dopamine
I don't how to put it in my own words. I'm not a biologist or chemist

 No.307428

>>307427
What I meant is fucking with the dopamine system by gulping to much alcohol. I know what it feels like, it's like a total draught, nothing is fun, complete anhedonia for days. But it passes, timeline depends on how much and for how long you've been drinking.

 No.307429

>>307428
I don't think it has something to do with the dopamine system. Drug withdrawal happens with antidepressant too and any kind of withdraw can lead to death, seizures and other awful things that are probably not related to dopamine.
>nothing is fun, complete anhedonia
Quite common effects when a body is ill and needs to preserve energy for recovery.

 No.307460

I am drunk again, but I poured out all alcohol yesterday and swore to never drink again, I am too weak

 No.307718

>>307460
drinking again



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 No.307023[Reply]

This is the classic "Suicide General", where we discuss methods and say farewell to our fellow wizards.

Previous:
>>296511
60 posts and 6 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.307697

>>307695
but considering brain is a computer it is the most realistic answer i know. if self consciousness was real then "i" would be a solid concept instead it's very vague and many even argue that "i" doesn't exist and that ego is an illusion.

 No.307698

what's with all this retarded philosophy debate itt?
i just want to kill myself

 No.307701

>>307697
Not the fella you're replying to but I don't think the brain can be boiled down to something as "simple" as a computer. I know this sounds woo-woo but my feeling is that the brain, like everything else in nature, has a lot of intuitive wisdom built into it. A computer is designed with a purpose within the limited mental constraints of its designers. There is a vastness, depth and interconnected-ness to things that emerge from natural evolutionary processes that simply do not map onto things made by humans. Perhaps the reason it is hard for us to pin down what "consciousness" is or "where that elusive I is located in the brain" is because we lack the language to even describe these sorts of things because we always get bogged down trying to dissect everything into atomic units.

 No.307702

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>>307698
>i just want to kill myself
That statement needs to be questioned because it's pretentious and presumptuous. Hence philosophy.

Now I'm with you as a pretentious and presumptuous person myself. I think it's obvious that nature and society are based on principles that guarantee suffering and I think it's obvious that any attempt to change yourself and others can never be more than marginal, temporary and superficial. Non-philosophically speaking: it was over before it began. Life sucks and will never get better unless you're a delusional npc.

Now if that's the case, it seems reasonable to assume that there is a force making it so. Do you believe you can defy that force by ending the body? Perhaps you can because that force selects those who are willing to put up it with it. That's the irony of the antinatalist desire: soon countless single men and countless single succubi are going to die without children and the world will go on with an ever increasing number of delusional npc's. Say rope-chan, do you like that thought?

 No.307717

>>307702
but this is the suicide thread, not the philosophy thread
idk about “defying” the force behind it by kms, but at the very least this life will end, so even if i have no absolute knowledge of whatever comes afterwards, i’m sure it won’t be a repetition
and yes, that final thought does bring me some comfort
we can’t leave this world without a smile, wiz



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 No.307580[Reply]

I am really tired
How can I find happiness independant of other people?
I cant deny I feel the need for connection, but it always ends poorly for me
2 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.307583

realistically what you really crave is just validation. connection is when you're validated by another person's existence because they share your world view or identity. that's difficult for wizardly types because we are more unique and less conformist than others, so it's difficult to find and meet such people.

>>307582
this is a good impersonal way of getting validation that might work for wizardly types. do something valuable, provide a service to a community of people and receive good feedback for it. you have to find a community that isn't completely anonymous and where content isn't transient, so that your contributions can compound and you increase the chance of your work being recognized by others.

i spent a good part of my teenage years just answering people's questions on tech forums and it was actually quite a good source of validation. even though i never made any "friends" in a traditional sense, helping people out with their questions and problems was rewarding for its own sake.

there's tons of ways of getting positive feedback from other people. probably easier than ever now that you have the internet. you just have to put yourself out there, create something interesting, help other people, provide interesting opinions and "takes" that mirror what people are already thinking about etc.

 No.307584

>>307582
>Engage with that hobby's community. Contribute to it.
lmao

 No.307598

>>307580
health, neeting, good entertainment
I guess i'm a bad person to give advice for this as i am suicidal

 No.307713

>>307582
Hobbies don't work long-term, they just give you something to do that isn't doomscrolling

 No.307714

>>307713
>Hobbies don't work long-term (for me), they just give (me) something to do that isn't doomscrolling
Is how you should have wrote your post.



 No.307706[Reply]

Why do us humans have to be so alone? I feel that despite having options to live and exist and do things we still are so very dependent on this biological programming to seek connection. I don't know how to say this but I honestly, often hate myself for seeking it from other people — trying to make friends who would listen, or talk, or at least stay. I know people are very busy and have no time to stay to listen and understand other people's loneliness but I typically wonder if I could just have one person, not a therapist, just one genuinely good person who would not be judgemental (although they could be if they have any good advice) and would just listen to me like I matter; my situation is not something I am making up, this is me, suffering from being an outlier who has tried so hard to be a part of normal people but just couldn't. I really tried, but the performance was too much (although calling it a performance would be hypocritical). I could not do it, everyday I felt I was lying to myself, there was a small part of whatever honesty left was leaving me everyday, slowly but I could feel it. I did't know if I am living or lying. How long can I continue with this? Even when alone one, doing his work, to push through shouldn't there be a part within him that calls for an alignment with his honest self? I feel I lack that, it feels so pretentious to be existing. I don't wanna leave everything and just run away because I am not strong enough but I wonder if I could continue like this, and even if I could, calling that just a part of being human and a lot of other (fellow wizards) are going through the same, I don't know how long I could go on without completely going insane.

 No.307707

conjure a tulpa



 No.301895[Reply]

Starting a new anti-suicide general as the original has been bump-locked.

Helping wizards to understand that persuasive feelings of suicide can be bested.

Further the discursive spirit of this thread will remain the same as the first: to counter the general luring tenor of sadness that defines all the other threads through sharing positive practical advice purposed to reducing suicidal behavior even when we feel most suicidal. Naturally, being that I started the topic, I will be the first to contribute.

(1) Know that I care about you guys deeply and sincerely. Call me a faggot, I don't care (many have already done this, to no worthwhile avail)
(2) Examine what you are eating. For example, gluten especially produces depressive/psychotic episodes in sensitive autistic individuals. Sugar also is not healthy for your brain. Delimiting ingestion of both is wise.
(3) Make sure you are getting sufficient sleep. Chronic sleeplessness or even a few days' worth of irregular sleep can seriously interfere with the clarity of our thinking.
(4) Clean up. Taking a warm shower and putting on fresh clean clothes always is refreshing and helps to break up darkened mental habits.
(5) Breathe fresh air. Open whichever windows punctuate your room and allow some wind to come in.
(6) Watch your breathing. When we are panicked, our breathing can become very disordered and we do not recognize the effect this has on our thinking. Take deep, purposeful breaths, and collect your thoughts.
(7) Respect yourself. You have done your best to survive in an awful world, and you should grant yourself forgiveness for any mistakes and the allowance to rest with a composed and balanced mind.

I've done my part. Anyone else?
87 posts and 13 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.306997

File: 1775934527191.jpeg (42.99 KB, 470x653, 470:653, images (1).jpeg) ImgOps iqdb

WAVING GOODBYE WAVING GOODBYE WAVING GOODBYE WAVING GOODBYE WAVING GOODBYE WAVING GOODBYE

WITH SOARING EYES

 No.307253

>>306994
under large remote trees is a spot i enjoy for meditating.

 No.307353

its not that bad. i only ever lurked here so im not totally sure what wiz attitudes towards substances are. why not try lsd and meditate on your experiences? read into buddhist practices and be cool.

 No.307560

>>304017
Are you Christian?

 No.307696




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