/dep/ - Depression

The more you interact with people irl the more chances they have to ruin your day
Avoiding contact is the best option for staying happy as a wizard based on my experience

Another Evil under the Sun Edition. You of many.

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Hesitation is defeat edition. There is no running away.

Previous >>309794

whenever you're depressed or sad, come here and draw something using Oekaki. you can draw whatever you want

In short, here are my symptoms.

My penis feels completely disconnected from my body and I can feel things from it only barely.
I can feel ejaculating when it is about to happen when I used to masturbate and some sensitivity from it, but all of it pales compared to how my penis felt before.
And my penis feels floppy and rubbery like when my penis is erect, it falls on the other side.
I don't get morning woods and if I have nocturnal emissions it beacuse slept near a objects and, in general, my penis feels stiff.
I should also mention that I used to masturbate a lot that time ago and that I suffer from Klienfelter syndrome.

In general, I think I suffer from some kinda hard flaccid syndrome, and I am not sure how to fix it. I am afraid that it will never be fixed no matter what

Is there any solution to this?

People with suicidal ideation tend to put blame on themselves, whereas people who don't tend to blame others. Where do you redirect your pain?

I'm not sure if people who are suicidal are fearful of life or hateful of it. I think hating it has an element of arrogance like 'only if x didn't happen,' only if y didn't do it to me.' It's as if they're indirectly saying that they could be better if certain circumstances didn't happen. Doesn't that point to the idea that the person is inherently competent but those external circumstances made them fail? I believe I don't fall into this line of reasoning. I believe I'd fail if I were put in another person's shoes. I'd still fail if all the opportunities in the world were present to me. There's a birth defect in me. I can't stay committed to anything, not my friends, not my job, not anything. I treat others like shit because I am one myself. I put the guilt on myself. Suicidal and depressed people who put the blame on others seem like a walking paradox. I decided to make this post after observing some of what the anons here have said. Everyone seems to have an infirectly positive outlook on themselves

This is my life, I can't take it anymore. Being unemployed for too long has made me depressed and crazy, just busy blaming others, spending time in front of my phone and computer screen. Bro, I'm going to die at home with my crazy parents who keep blaming me. I can't even die, it's so hard to find a job. I don't know what else to do. I want to die but I don't want to kill myself, I'm too scared to do it. In junior high, I thought the bullying and demands for school fees were the worst things I've ever experienced until I went crazy and thought about killing myself. But it turns out, being unemployed now is much worse than I thought, especially with crazy parents who keep blaming me every day until I want to die. Maybe financially I'm still supported by my parents, but mentally I'm a mess. I want to go crazy but I can't. The world seems to be holding me back, right? If I apply for a job and act crazy at work, the world will definitely hold me back, just like when I was in high school, I acted crazy as if someone was holding me back from acting crazy. I can't stand it anymore, I'm going to be wild and crazy hahahaha damn damn damn this world, I want to scream HUAAAHH… When I was in high school I was treated special by my friends at school but because of that I was also hated because they were ENVY of me who was liked by all my friends, unlike when I was in junior high where I was bullied and demands for school fees and in high school I deliberately gave a speech about covid 19 so that I would be evil, when I was in kindergarten I gave a monster speech so it seemed like there was something that fit with it and sure enough in high school those who thought I was evil and those who were jealous saw me get opportunities and I was pushed aside and now I've graduated from school and am unemployed with crazy parents and I'm going crazy, if this world thinks I'm evil and everyone thinks I'm evil why not, if I'm considered stupid and weird why don't I accept it all I'm evil, stupid, weird, and i deserved it. I watched a gore documentary and it turns out there are people who are more evil than me because I am evil because of Covid 19, and I am afraid of killers, but strangely, when I was in high school, there was a murder case and the trial never ended, 8 month case and strangely, the trial was over the next day when I gave a speech in class when I was in high school and now I have graduated and am unemployed.

if only killing yourself would be easy. If only no one cared for me, if only I cared for no one. If only I didn't make nobody sad if I killed myself. I wish suicide did not arm anyone who cares for me, if only killing myself was releasing of the soul. The chains tied to this earth are linked to the people I don't want them to be sad because of my death. if it was this easy…I'd do it anytime soon, but halas, it's a painful and selfish act

>AI has already replaced programmers
>Programming no longer makes sense
>But programming is the only thing I know to work
>not like i was ever good
>im actually bad
>I try to go back to leran programming the way I used to
>Spent an hour writing and debugging code only to give up in the end, only to have an AI do it better in 5 minutes with fewer than 50 words
>I struggle to have a reason to live
>But every now and then I go to sleep with the faint hope that I'll wake up in another reality, in a better moment of my life where I have no debts, where my career isn't going down the drain, where I still got some hope. But when I wake up, my despair grows deeper with each passing month each passing day, as I get older, poorer, and more useless.

I'm tired of everything. I don't talk to anyone. Not even to myself lately, to hear my own ideas is tiresome as i know nothing will come out of that. i struggle to even speak myself out.

This is the classic "Suicide General", where we discuss methods and say farewell to our fellow wizards.

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