/dep/ - Depression

>>304350
>everyone i've ever liked killed themselves or is in jail.
Are you a gangbanger?

>>304801
buckwheat is good however it is very oxalate-dense (so you shouldn't over-eat it).

>>305017
>oxalate-dense
thank you for the reminder; no food is "superfood" so one should eat different foods from time to time

>>305026
absolutely agreed

>>305026
there are all kinds of good gluten-free pastas out there. but make sure you don't over-do on any rice-based varieties, as these will cause your blood arsenic levels to rise very quickly.

>>304651


r u sure its not some Jordan with some Afghan Borzoi doggo pet?
set up a cam

>>304646
I've been researching and apparently some people crash from ginger and other organic serotonin antagonists, I tried for a day but I wasn't sure to keep going after I read some people's experiences

>>305050
I couldn't surmise that there would be any danger in incorporating a small amount of grated organic ginger root into your daily tea/water. I did this myself years ago and found no harm from it. It was one of the first serotonin antagonists that I had discovered to which I had no ill reaction.

Ginger, B1, Magnesium, Vitamin E, total discontinuation of the offending drug (ssri, etc.), eliminating fluoride, sweating, belief that things can and will improve – are all helpful weapons in fighting pssd, all of which can lead to cure.

>I tried for a day but I wasn't sure to keep going after I read some people's experiences

Be mindful that many in the "pssd community" do not want others to improve. This is not say that I am calling into question their claimed experiences with certain herbs (ie, ginger), but at least in virtue of my own experience with pssd and the trying out of different serotonin antagonists of variable strength, I can say I do not feel you need to be afraid of crashing on the ingesting of some ginger for however many few days. Ginger has been used safely for thousands of years; even in antiquity high-class etairai (greek prostitutes) would mix ginger into the drinks of their clients so to encourage arousal.

But like in any personal experiment, proceeding gradually by steps, not over-running one's goal, being watchful for any sensitivity in the diet to the introduction of a new element, is always a wise course. So ultimately it is up to you. But don't ever lose confidence that your brain can be restored to its original healthy chemistry…whichever restorative path you end up following.

>>305150
I've also noticed that everyone in the "pssd community" is terribly dishonest, there is so much toxic positivity going on. So many people think their condition is a fundamental aspect of their personality and spend all their precious time discussing their symptoms. That can't be healthy… I never want to become like that.

>Magnesium, Vitamin E, B1
Do you recommend dietary supplements or rather only finding it in natural foods?

Thank you for reassuring me about ginger. I put some in my tea every day now. I've been doing cardio, exercising, and eating healthy without fail. And thanks for your previous advice, I wish all wizs would realize what you said about serotonin and the people behind it all - this is truly evil.

Anyway, I hope I have what it takes to keep going. I'll try not to lose hope, it seems that dopamine receptors take more than a year to heal. By the way, I don't even care about libido that much anymore, I think I've accepted that's how things are now. But I can't accept the anhedonia… Climbed up a hill yesterday and felt nothing. It goes away sometimes thankfully. Sorry for blogpost.

>>305297
>Do you recommend dietary supplements or rather only finding it in natural foods?

Whichever you feel most comfortable with. I used supplements (in particular magnesium and tocopherol) when I first started out…but I never stuck with taking them for too long of a time (likely because I began noticing improvement through the use of ginger, exercise, sweating, etc.). Also I had found that too much magnesium would give me crippling headaches and too much vitamin E (again in pills/supplements) would give me bad stomach pains, so this meant I never really was able to continue with taking either. However I will say that taking a good B-vitamin is probably the most important of the three and something that I still often do.

>And thanks for your previous advice, I wish all wizs would realize what you said about serotonin and the people behind it all - this is truly evil.

You're most welcome. Learning about this (impotence or generalized sexual dysfunction from ssri usage) is rightly shocking and disgusting to anyone with a good heart.

Start working out.

I remember being around 18/19 and dreaming of getting diagnosed with some mental illness or disability to allow me to get free money. Sadly never worked, and my parents were heavily against it despite me having a strong case. "Muh honor, you must work for the system!!!!!". I worked with a guy that has now successfully acquired a lifetime sickness benefit for some back pain issues, which isn't even that bad considering he still rides a sports motorbike. He's making like 75% of a 40 hour minimum wage paycheck, plus gets free rent and other little perks. Essentially he's making 3x/3.5x min wage if you count it purely in dollars. I'm unreasonably jealous. Imagine having 600 dollars a week to just spend on any dumb shit you want for the rest of your life and never needing to clock in ever again. Workers are the real chumps.

>>305398
Really rough anon
Reminds me of my experience
I just want to be free from responsibility
If my life is gonna be sad and pathetic atleast leave me be in my small bubble of relative happiness
Nothing good has ever come for me from interacting with the world and I wish to cease

>>305403
Can I ask what job you're doing now? I think the best we can do is try to find something that isn't so bad and lower our standards of living so we can have more free time. I had 1 year of working nightshift at my job, it was bliss but under new management I'm now forced to interact with customers during peak hours and drive in horrible traffic. I thought I appreciated what I had, I didn't appreciate it enough. Sadly good jobs are disappearing these days with the advent of these eager slaves willing to break backs for peanuts. When I first entered the work force they would joke about how half of my day I was free to "look busy" and do my own thing. Now you can't even take a 5 second break after pulling a 2 ton pallet with a broken trolley without being yelled at and written up. We are worked like those slave egypt had

Some schoolie said "you're trying to look better than you are" out of blue

The details are hazy, though.

MAYBE she meant it for someone else she had a conversation with moments prior…

>>305353
It's wild to read on the past and seeing that people just died all the time after 40. Like, even old kings had a modal age of death of like 49, and this was the ones that survived the 50% infant mortality.

>>305389
It is factual, doesn't mean it didn't sting a little to hear it put in such a manner. This is separated from insults.

>>305396
Also think of the painful conditions that had essentially no treatment. When I am in serious pain due to whatever cause, I can usually get the right medicine for it within 24 hours. Can't imagine having to live the rest of your life just carrying the burden, which I'm sure everyone did back then. There hasn't been a good time to be alive on this planet ever, just slightly less shitty periods depending on various factors, luck especially

>>305314
>words that left an impression
A succubi from my university group told me one day
>“I think you have limiting beliefs.”
I didn't talk to her to much, very smalltalks but in the end I agreed with her.
I think she changed my mindset and perception of life and things in a healthy way.
cool succubi, Perhaps the only one I've known so far.
>Also
I don't deny that I liked her in the long term, but the truth is that I know I'm not her ideal type. She wasn't your typical succubi with normie ideas, she also had her problems (traumas around a young relationship and other fucked up things)
She was a bit childish and mischievous at times, but sweet and kind, quite magnetic for how shy and quiet she was.
I grew a little fond of her even though she was a somewhat Christian New Ager with some woo-woo beliefs and traumas.
>so
I hope she's well and I wish to her all the best things with all the friendship she gave me.

>>305399
Your story reminded me of one of mine.

I met a succubus about a year ago at a pop culture event in my city. She had that mix of tomboy and “weird cult succubus who loves philosophy and history.” Flat chest, medium-length dark brown hair, glasses. She didn’t wear makeup at all. That day, she was wearing a suit and selling manga.

And me — someone who has been obsessively reading manga my entire life — I thought, “Obviously she doesn’t know anything about this stuff, lol.”

At that exact moment, she looked at me and said:
“Hey, man, you look really sad and kind of abandoned. I think you’ll like this manga.”

Then she showed me Genshiken.

I was completely confused. Completely shocked.

By the way… that manga is really good. I loved it, lol.

>>305190
2020 have done A LOT to keep normies … well, not so normalcy-oriented, if we remember it right

>>305190
this is interesting
I always wondered what the "society is collapsing" posters really meant

>>305260
2020 was a great divide. It pushed many people into extremisms, whether it be politically, socially, deviancy or in any other manner you can think of. Very few people have a "Oh well that happened xD" as their true feelings about the lockdowns, I overhear 1,000's of coworkers and customers talk about it over the years. One group that got extremely nudged to insanity were small business owners, imagine working hard in a bakery you are putting blood sweat and tears into just for it to be forcibly closed. Your stock goes to waste, your rent/lease still needs to be paid and you're given like 10% of your actual earnings for compensation. Forced to sell up or give up, all the while McDonalds and KFC could still operate selling that genetically modified and chemically enhanced normie slop.

>>305277
I do too, I believe it's how Westerners are embracing LDAR (Lay down and rot) whilst 3rd worlders happy to work for peanuts take over and then those in charge inevitably make us corrupted (even more so) shit hole nations. Seeing a doctor in 2005 was easy, took 1 hour. In 2035 it'll take all day and cost all you have. Same with ALL services, unless you can pay your way to shortcut it. Good luck with that, as the min wage will have no purchasing power at all aside from enough to keep you alive to work another day, and that's if we are lucky.

Rough times ahead for all of us. Looks like the Elite will finally have humans domesticated like cattle soon.

>>305279
Oh yeah.

truly, 2020 was a great divide. All and all, I was on the lucky side in 2020 so got to experience the "haha normies getting rekt", "haha antivaxxers be mad", "haha oxford vaccine project rekt" haha fun and next to none of the "when will this eeeeeeend???" woe.

>>305295
I took a lot of pleasure watching the moronic cattle freak out. It was kind of scary to realize how easily they can actually be manipulated en masse though. Several reports of succubi ending their lives after 2 days of not being able to socialize. How weak, and these people vote? These people have says in our day to day lives in the workforce? Disgusting. I sadly did have to work during those lockdowns and I was pissed off about my country saying how kind and smart we all are for following the rules, and how our people know how to behave. Meanwhile everyone was acting like an animal with rabies. I am grateful for this event further entrenching me in my wizard life beliefs, I feel no shame in being an outcasted hermit who only operates in society when I have to. Not looking forward to the next mass hysteria event, I have a feeling it will be a lot more serious whether in terms of the actual threat, or the restrictions imposed on us.

>>304190
>What do fellow wizzies here think of the /fringe/ reading list? petsonally ive only read the kybalion
They Kybalion is a re-made up of another book of Atkinson (arcane formulas? Or some tittle with mansonry in it i dont remember) with more hermetic aesthetic, i dont like it. I enjoyed it at my first entrance in supposed western esoterism (its not western esoterism but its kinda into modern religious esoterism pre-new age like teosophy) but now I know its kinda lame, its like a new age book.
>not to mention that it's getting a lot of bad rep lately in hermetic circles for not relating to hermeticism
It have a lot or new thought ideas, its not truly hermetic philosophy with greek-egyptian lore rituals and etc.
New thought its more like a offshot of Mesmerism-Hypnosis with Christian Science with some light indian beliefs or aesthetics with some universal metaphysics. If you enjoy it as a chaoist or it make thing for you work for the paradigm its ok, In ME personal case, dont work for me.
>and bardon's exercises that i want you anons opinion on.
Suppusoedly Bardon stealed some secret book and paper of a magic lodge or something (sound like crowley) but i dont know.
Bardon intro to hermetics its like a Raja Yoga with a lot of techniques focuses on breath, visualization and correspondences and etc. Its very technical at first not to focused on ritualism (he have other books focused on that topic)
I enjoy bardon and some techniques are from Indian Yogas techniques and maybe chinese and others from western ideas, I see it more focused on itself esoteric system than a Hypnosis or belief like new thoughts guys.
This book its more internal (like a qi gong as example) than external focused on rituals or invocations evocations, etc.
>Its true hermetism?
In bardon sense, yeah, but in a hermetic philosophy and practices of western greek-egyptian-alchemy OG lore, nope. Go read hermetic philosophy and religious books of hermetism for that.

>Fringe reading list
If you want some books of magick of personal, post-modern, maybe lodge tradition or new age fluffbunny and wicca there're some books here Post too long. Click here to view the full text.

>>304192
>if you don't have a middle ground between absolute belief, dogma and agnosticism you can become a asshole.
always stay humble in your beliefs. i really enjoyed the kybalion for what it was the first time ive read but i obviously was a bunch of snake oil bullshit from the get-go, empty promises with no real hermetic background. Hells he even failed to describe hermetic philosophy properly. that leddit jew was right in regards to him, because when i read the arcane teachings he also somehow created a new occult order out of the blue from supposedly ancient chaldea called the arcane council, with the same recycle "hermetic laws" and manifestation/unmanifestation phaes of creation. im kinda pissed off i wasted my time for nothing. thank you /fringe/. Might have better luck with other books tho.

>>303398
Read this book, very useful as a start for knowledge of anxiety and how to fix behaviour.

>>303398
>Place a pillow under your knees, and sleep without a pillow under your head.
I read somewhere that the first helps you sleep better and the second helps circulation in your back and neck. I sleep without a pillow under my head because I find it more comfortable for sleep.

>Hug a pillow (rest in bed or sit or stand)
Dont ask why, just do it, for more than 23-25 sec.
You can add visualization, acting like youre huggins someone or sing to the pillow.
>Bedsheet hug (for sleep etc)
Weight yourself down with the sheets (or make a sheets weight pillow) and try to achieve the effect of a hug. Add visualization or act like you're hugging someone etc.
Don't put too much weight on your chest or you'll have trouble breathing and you'll have nightmares, or you might cut off the blood circulation in your arm.
>Also
One day i dreamed with anime characters (three lolis) with this way, incredible wholesome dream and very comfy.
It felt like heaven.

>>303398
>>304627
I was doing LBRP (Lesser banishment ritual of the pentagram) and LBRH (Lesser banishment ritual of the hexagram) for a few days now and I chill out so much and i dont know why.
I also go to a beach nearby, started taking photographs, and spend time with my cats.
I feel good and happy, I don't know if it's related to the fact that I sleep better too.

Tried to befriend a person. He would not listen to me at all. Friendship - screw him

Well, yeah, a lot of schoolboys used to bully me (of course they would bully a fatherless person who's too tall, they would call me "second yearer" and such.)

Good thing those bully twins aren't in my town anymore. I assume they had to move to Siberia to work some plant job…

>>304195
Basically, when Im bored and have to focus, I remeber those stinky working-class (cook's kids?) retarded kids who couldn't handle 4th grade curriculum yet had the brainz to leave a fuckton of emotional markings in my mind. I suppose they live the life I expected thm to live - gatherting scraps ant some kitchen job, "trying to survive", "it's not us being ass, it's life being ass" stuff…

>>300350
I can't really form what I feel into anything coherent anymore. It's just a misshapen undefinable amalgam.
Maybe because if it gets defined it'll be the day I've settled for suicide

I had an insight last night

see, in the "Metal slug (???number???)"'s final, the outro sequence outro, you see a guy lauching a paper plane. Said plane flies throughout all cleared levels showing some people mourninv over, well, the mooks who got killed by the playable characters..

And in the end this plane flies towards the night sky, turning into a little innocent star in the sky.

E N D

I remembered this scene.

"Maybe this is all what I wanted to be all along", I thought last night. "A little… innocent… star in the sky…" (and then it rained)

>>305009
That's just how old succubi talk

>>305011
I accidentally started to respect my mother thanks to you reply: my mother is a certified master of the art of "old succubi talk".


Feels good to know she's a pro at some "normal thingy".

>>305011
>>305013

thanks to your reply. (Sorry, a phoneposter's typo)


Happy New 2026 Year!

Wizard, warlocks, robots, failed normies, normies, chads, tyrones, simps, ALL THE MEMES can all agree

succubi.

>>305013
guess I should buy her something.


I feel so much shame I think at least 1 of my complexes stems from still not getting her a new extension cord + TV antenna (telly), a new hole in the wall (mirror), a small player (telly - VCR)

hold on. I did.
I got a new bed for me mum.

>>299368
>How do you guys deal with fatigue, if at all.
"Shall live and die by the fuck you". If providence wants me to be a slave OK I couldn't care less. I can't seem to comprehend how the fuck I am supposed to do anything when I basically have two options
1. Wake up late and be sleepy all day
2. Wake up early and be miserable all day
I have realized that the amount sleep doesn't matter. I'm just fucked up by the Gods themselves. Days when I feel acceptably well happen as often as you find a pattern in white noise.

>>299368

OK, so, I am going to spill some *seemingly offtopic* idea: try optimizing your sleeping station.
Reasoning is that… so you *could* - *probably*, at least - get higher quality sleep, by not aching while sleeping.
PROFIT: you will recharge better for the same sleeping time.

CONTEXT: I mean, sleeping on trashy bed >>> bad sleep despite "proper" hours of sleep >>> fatigue… >>> errors

Details: well, it happened to me! Twice or even "thrice"!

1. I had a too warm blanket. A wool blanket, "normal" for an old house, was too warm for me in our brand new heat-insulated apartment. I bought a cotton blanket - half the insulation - for 20$ or so recently and woke up so well-rested I remeber thinking "and… how come no one have told me this before?!?!"
2. I got a cool matress this year! Slapped it atop my cheap "sofa bed" with a huge crack (two 200x70 sleeping cusions, but not a single 200x140) My back finally stpped aching.

3. Also, I got a good big pillow (I am a big person, as in both tall and fat)
Without it, I have a harder time sleeping

4. AC in the summer. (Or a dehumidifier and a bunch of spare water bottles, at least… not sure if that's a good idea though)

5. Get a set of disposeable nose expanders to see if your sleep improves. If it does, well, check yourself for "Sleep apnea" stuff. REASON: What if you *need* a CPAP mask but you don't know about it yet?

The solution is getting diagnosed for adhd and getting precscribed stimulants. If you can control to urge to binge them, and take them as prescribed - it is LIFE CHANGING

>>304372
>1. Wake up late and be sleepy all day
>2. Wake up early and be miserable all day
>I have realized that the amount sleep doesn't matter


sounds like the issue I had before I upgraded my bedroom.


You should try:
1. a better matress
2. a better pillow
3. air humidifier?
4. vitamins
5. eating less, wear something to tighten your belly (spandex?) to trick your belly into thinking its still full…

I mean, I used to be even fatter than I am now. Nowadays, I feel less problems…