/dep/ - Depression

I don't get it, their only byproduct is pollution, I have allergy but that is fine I can cope up with it, but my pet cat or rather my mother's bad cat literally goes and hides inside the bed. I mean I just don't get it.

Like it is clear that fireworks do not benefit the environment and their byproduct literally lasts for a few seconds, think about this, like if you bbq at least you eat something, if you drive a car at least you get somewhere.

I just don't get it, and this is not just limited to one county, lunar day, 4th of july, etc. all across the world. Like they are literally one thing that I do not get honestly. I understand that caring about environment for a wiz like me is redundant cause I don't have a stake in the future but I just dont it man.

I'm not doing great in life. Living and confronting life is hard for me. I'm weak. Life will crush on me one day, I don't have the strength to live and fight for my life. The more time passes the more I want to kill myself or I won't make it into life. Life's hard, living is not easy. I don't have will to live. depression is like a black hole, it's very strong and trap will to live wihch is like life is being suck out of me by the black hole depression. At this point and the point of this thread is to share this and to relate to other wizards who feel or live the same way as I. I just want to relate…just this time.

I feel like the last few years have passed so quickly, every day I spend alone, isolated, but it's okay, every problem I face, fatigue, failure, sadness, and so on, I've been through every day, but hey, I'm still here until now and it seems like I've made peace with my mental problems, maybe I'm used to facing it alone without the help of others, I feel like depression is part of my routine and part of my personality, but I'm happy

Hi guys, I have a question for the people more involved with the so-called self harm community. Since posting about self harm here and there recently, I've learned a little more. I've heard people talk about 'cute/nice looking scars' and that got me thinking, since im gonna have these scars forever anyway, i would at least want them to not look hideous. Where can i find these communities to ask questions about how to take care of these wounds to have nice looking scars? Or even find what kind of scars there are? Most places dont get into that stuff cuz it's sort of 'chronically online' so i don't know where to find info like this. So if any of you have any answers or perhaps recommendations of places/forums/servers/websites/whatever where i can find aaall sorts of self harm related info (good and bad) please do let me know! thank youu

If ordinary people were nice to me, it would be a trick to play me and take advantage of me, and if there were people who were honest and kind to me, the chances were very slim. The difference between being kind when someone helps someone who stumbles and falls on the street for a while and falling into poverty or long-term depression is very big, and I think, if I fall into depression, whether financially, mentally, or anything else, ordinary people will just laugh at me and when I'm no longer in trouble and fine, ordinary people will just take advantage of me. That's why I think making a chaos attack is better than being helped by someone.

Lookism has become a public, popular topic lately on the internet and I believe that it affects wizards in very tangible ways.
Being a genetic dead end ugly loser myself I suffer for it even as a now "middle aged" man.
One would think such things are left behind in high school or something, but no.

You queue up for a service, government office for some paperwork, a cash register at a store, post office or hell even medical services.
You can tell the people before you were treated kindly. At worst processed in a neutral way.
Some even receive a cheerful response and the help they need, people go above and beyond for some.
Then it's your turn at the line.

A look of disdain follows immediately. Quiet. No "what can I help do for you" "what can I help you with" "what is the purpose of your visit".
Silence. Faces contort…
Sometimes a sigh, sometimes some snide remark. Clear hostility.

A shift in demeanor so noticeable, so obvious, so visceral… (yet to them likely natural) that even the thickest of autism wont help you stay oblivious to it.
You get mistreated, worse service, denied service you paid for, medical gaslighting, humiliation over and over again.
Networking is impossible for you, who by your mere acquaintance devalue their status.. and without connections, being treated like this, only having the "official route" as an option you soon realize you might not be able to get anything done.

After much pushing, repeated humiliations and humbling yourself, matching your demeanor to that expected of "your ilk" some old lady at the register might take pity and process your request, prescribe your medication, refer you to a proper doctor.
Sometimes the stars do align like that and you make a step towards a slightly less miserable state of being.

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if only killing yourself would be easy. If only no one cared for me, if only I cared for no one. If only I didn't make nobody sad if I killed myself. I wish suicide did not arm anyone who cares for me, if only killing myself was releasing of the soul. The chains tied to this earth are linked to the people I don't want them to be sad because of my death. if it was this easy…I'd do it anytime soon, but halas, it's a painful and selfish act

Let's talk a bit about anterior hanging.
In theory, placing the knot under your chin should make it less painful since instead of restricting air from reaching your lungs and crushing your windpipe it's stopping bloodflow from reaching your brain instead.
This is why in martial art most people choose tap out when they are being air choked while those that are put into blood choke are able to endure until they pass out.
This thread is made solely for educational purposes. If you're suicidal, please contact your therapy.

I'm already in a bad position. I'm a 29 year old Zoomer. My parents are mid range boomers. Even if they were somewhat normal there would be so much of a divide that it would make any common ground unreasonable to expect. However they are mentally ill. That was the excecution shout after I was already on the ground cowering and blown to pieces.

My father: Total naive nimrod. He could be in the middle of a South American prison yard with everyone giving him death stares and sharpening their blades. He'd be smiling like an idiot and ask "Do you mexican fellas like tacos?" "I have a lot of money back at home, I like to buy nachos!". He leaves his car RUNNING and unlocked as he spends hours in the shopping centre. His car has been stolen atleast 10+ times. He's no longer able to be insured, yet he still does this. He's dropped an easy 150k+ in stolen cars that could have been idk, not wasted? I swear his awareness IQ is easily like 10~25. He gives everyone money but his own family.

MY mother: She's even worse, she has all the same qualities as my dad but she's also mumbling to herself non stop. She talks 24/7 and that isn't a joke. She will have an hour long rannt at me about checking the mail box "I checked the mail, or did i? I didn/t wait no i did but i dont remember or did i did i? there was no mail or was there? there is mail? when is mail?" Literally just that on repeat, if she isn't talking she is grumbling to herself NON FUCKING STOP!!!!!!!!! why cant she shut the fuck up

I was so depressed that I was emotional and my hair was messy, making me bored and even more depressed, plus my parents' daily nagging, so today afternoon I went to the barber and asked the barber to cut my hair in a cyberpunk 2077 style and I was happy to see the results and they didn't disappoint. I was seen as strange by other people but I didn't care, I thought my hair was cool in this cyberpunk style, bald on the sides but the top hair and bangs were left long i like my new hair cyberpunk hair because im depressed but i like my new hair.