/dep/ - Depression

Does any of you get irritated with family gatherings or when guests come to visit you in your family's house?
I am 24 years old, little to not school education, no job, whenever I am with some relatives or in some family gathering I can sense how much they look down at me for being a massive loser, even if they almost never express it directly at all, since I was a child I would always be asked by them questions like "how are you doing in school?" or "are you getting any good grades" Of course they no longer ask me such question, But I still feel a lot of shame when I am around them, I try to avoid sitting with them like the plague

i'm 27, i live with my parents, i don't have a job and to be honest i don't give a fuck anymore. i would have wanted to move out 5 years ago, when i had a ton of ambitions, but my fuckin overprotective mother didn't give me a hint of freedom. now they hate me just for being. like everyone else. i used to be good at history and wanted to move in that direction, and now i'm NEET who spends all my free time on the internet and goes to the store once a week. i hate them for not letting me realize myself in a life that i don't see any point in right now.
thank u mom

I don't understand people who say we live in incredible times or that the world is getting better (pedophile morons like Steven Pinker, to put it mildly).
This image. This aberration to the eye. This is how 50-80% of the population lives in the most powerful and richest nation on the planet (or at least close to/similar to this).
This is the "pinnacle" of 6,000 years of recorded civilizational history. If this is how the majority of the US population lives, imagine how poor and miserable the majority of humanity really is.
If it weren't for East Asia, the world would be even worse.

I have no purpose at life. I just roam. I do this since I was born. Never said one day I'm going to do something. I'm waiting the moment I will say "fine thats' it, thats the day I'll do something with my life" but I know it will never come. I'm a trash

I'm in my 30s. People I went to school with and family friends are married, have high paying careers and are healthy. I got the advantages of parents, an education and the first world and high performing peers and I still fumbled it all.

The tittle, literally I can't find comfortable clothes, I hate be forced by society to dress with blue jeans, it fit me horrible, i never feel good seeing myselt in a mirror, is ok you can be shit people with me. You can't fuck me more…

How do you guys manage to stay out of bed as shut-in NEETs? I have been a NEET for almost a decade and only now have I realized I'm addicted to laying on my bed all day. I think all started 10 or so years ago when I was still in school, I started to prefer laying on my bed than staying on the computer or doing anything else on my free time. Then I dropped out and became a NEET. Obviously as a shut-in there's not much to do so I normally stay on my bed all day. I have a good computer, but can't stand using it for long. My back and legs start aching and I just find my bed so damn comfortable. I have lots of blankets, cuishons and plushies to make myself even extra comfy. This is bothering me because I can't work on personal projects or use the static bike I bought because I spend my days on my bed doing nothing. Even lurking the internet is way better for me on the bed using my tablet because I can zoom in if I have to and I can watch anime on it. I started joining IRC channels from my computer in hopes to keep myself out of bed since IRC works better from a desktop.
This seems to be a real mental condition called clinophilia. There's barely any info on it besides https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clinophilia and most people online treat it like a joke "haha yeah I love staying in bed!" normalfag type of comments. But this is a serious illness as it makes me unable to stay healthy and active even as a NEET.

Whitepillers don't have a retort for autism. You can get a good degree, pursue your hobbies and work on your self esteem but if you have autism you will never make it in this anti-autistic world, Life is all about one thing. Being born without autism. If you're born without autism the normies will make excuses for you, help you out, share money with you, give you 100 chances, etc. Meanwhile if you have autism you're evil and creepy just for existing and blinking the wrong way. Everybody gets to live for free except autists and only autists who are given this fake ass "you gotta pull yourself up by your bootstraps and make your life" "you gotta amount to something" "innovation" story. Shit that literally no one else has to follow.

All my life I believed that studying guaranteed a future, a job, comfort, and a certain circle of good people from a certain social class that was educated and maybe healthy and more good compared to the environment I was born into (I saw this with other people and i knew this vision was true)
I am in my first year of college studying to be a teacher, and the people I have met here are not exactly nice to me. I am not interested in being social, but I still feel like an outcast. I no longer have the motivation to study and the idea of getting a degree is… lost.
>but why anon?
I joined a group here out of a mixture of obligation and necessity, I've seen that the people in my group interact, talk, converse, and get together, and I can see perfectly how everything flows naturally for them, as if there were some kind of magnetic attraction between them. they even interact with each other to form romantic relationships, they share personal things and I feel that they empathize with each other.
>And anon? just ignore it a do your things
I feel so fucking out of place like a alien around humans. It's as if I were cursed and i know they know and are paranoid know it. The truth is that pretending to be sociable no longer works for me. It's as if they knew that I wasn't normal. I noticed them saying too much to me things like
>you're very serious and responsible (when I asked someone how they saw me)
>you're very quiet (when the others wouldn't stop talking, I just listened because I didn't have anything… to say)
>Why do you isolate yourself so much from others? (when I was honest and refused to have a picture of me taken, i dont like photos)
and I thought I could ignore it, but I can't And I swear that every damn time they ignore me or say something like this to me, it hurts.
I was doing well with my studies, but those last few weeks I had to interact more socially with my group, and I realized that I'm awful. I don't know if I don't have a personality, but that last thing they said about me isolating myself from other hurt me so much because I don't know how the hell to act. It's as if I had dehumanized myself, automatically becoming an outcast, a gypsy, or the Jew of the group. Maybe I messed up my teenage years and didn't have normie experiences like everyone elPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

I've seen studies where they have said that testosterone is at a historical low for many males, testosterone gives you resilience to emotional problems, makes you more competitive, more risk-taking Etc.
I've always been fat and always been highly stressed for most of my life so I'm pretty sure my testosterone has been in the toilet. When I was going through puberty I was extremely fucking horny like any other kid but that didn't really change my behavior or make me better with succubi. I was fucked up back then but I remember my feelings not taking all my attention.

Has anyone gotten testosterone replacement treatments or taken steroids how did it make you feel?