/dep/ - Depression

>>301262
Lemme guess. Your sleep schedule is a mess, you have a cheap bed or none (a.k.a. sleeping on a coach); you have no blackout curtains and no background noise to hum out the small noises in the night.


Well… You may or may not have additional" factors that render a decent drug useless.

>>301789
This was all true except now at my parents place I have an awesome bed

And it is dark and quiet enough here.

It's way better.

But.

My boss is back from leave and making me feel like shit again.
This job has rare qualities: remote, low effort, high pay, low interaction, secure, and prestigious. I’d be throwing away a dream job.

As for thinking I need to quit to focus on therapy or medication: that’s not true. When I was not working, I found I don't get healthier. I don’t eat better, exercise more, or feel less anxious. I just stress about different things — including future jobs, financial security, family and community perception and relationship prospects as a result of my job.
i am actually more productive in ny life outside work when I've worked that day it seems or worked during weekday if it's weekend, so not only a mental health boost but productivity.

That said, if the working conditions are too harsh for me, I still have to quit if I can't find a resolution, whatever the consequences.

The meds (I'm OP) are still keeping me from feeling too suicidal tho. Worth it. Still depressed tho.

hold on


so you used to consume SSRIs…

…without consuming serotonin precursors?

Well… You could use some 10$ box of L-carnitine



also, try fixing your diet (how? See "Dr. Berg" channel)

>>301848
ooh.

glad to hear the "better" part, comrade


I used to be somewhere in the /dep/ zone too. Never showed up at local schrink's since my maternal brother is a certified schizo (so they would pretty much misdiagnose me as yet another schizo as well)

>>301848
>My boss is back from leave and making me feel like shit again.


I wonder if you and your boss have different ethnicities, so you pretty much could try and "fake it till you make it" to be into boss' culture?

>>301594
Wizfren are you still with us?? I can't find the obituary

>>301883
He might not be a wiz after all

Looks like he really did 404 though
https://www.youtube.com/live/SQFA7R4EZ3w

if youre gonna die anyway might as well do psychedelics

>>301889
I feel a strange sense of warmth and connection with the ACK victim whenever they actually succeed and I can find their details online. Staring at Liam's experiences at his previous schools/universities and connecting it to his successful ACK is like watching an ethereal portal open up right in front of you, giving you to an opportunity escape this world. It makes me shut out all of the external sensory stimuli around me, as if I'm in a dreamy trance state.

https://thehofstrachronicle.com/75146/features/2019-10-29-the-wizarding-world-of-hofstra-university

>>300268
how's your sleep?
i imagine you have a lot of sleep issues with chronic headaches not to mention how it will hinder your functionality at school/work

>>300270
My chronic headaches appear few times per day, but if I close my eyes for a while a headache would disappear, so sleep is not a problem for me.

Before AI existed I tried to google my problem, but there were no specific informations about that, but only texts - ,,laser pointer in few seconds can make pernament damage", but no one exactly discribed, what ,,pernament eye damage" means.

I also never went to eye doctor to ask, because from my experiences doctors can sometimes be assholes.

In a just world, you would've lawyered up.

>>300268
>But it made my realise, in life nothing is sure, and bad things happens everywhere, you ll be in bad place at bad time and you can lost your health, etc.
Wow, how profound

One time doing laser work I accidentially glanced at a blue-ray laser diode. I saw it through a piece of beam blocking paper I made that had a large circle in the middle at beam height. When I looked away I started seeing that same circle and square shape where ever I looked. I was so terrified but the image eventually faded.

Generally any damage to your retina can be compensated by your brain reprocessing the image. However things like floaters make it difficult because they don't track with your eye movements.

The only really dangerous things is if you start seeing black blotches at the edge of your eye sight slowly growing inwards. These mean your retina is detaching and you have 24 hours to get surgery before permanently losing your eyesight.

>>297544
Social skills and confidence which also correlate are the main points. Without social skills you can't even pursue things like art properly except for the obvious parts that just require creative skill but you will still end up stuck if you don't have the social abilities even with talent and potential on your side.

Its also a good point that this is not about succubi or other noise that doesn't matter. Socializing will always be pointless but having social abilities is still very important because it's about way more than having a good time.

You don't even need to be very social or crazy likeable, you just need to be able to navigate socially. You can even be quiet or reserved to get along in life socially but what you can't be is weird, autistic, insecure or too shut off/in. A lot of guys make the mistake of thinking that they are just quiet when in all actuality they are completely socially retarded while actual quiet guys don't even have social issues and are able to navigate and understand things.

A whole lot of this correlates with confidence, if you are insecure and lack confidence then every social interaction will be unbearable and you will never improve socially even if you expose yourself to situations. Confidence is a whole different chapter however.

>>297542
I've been trying to improooooove myself for years. Never got anywhere. Self-improvement is mostly a myth. It's a nice fantasy we tell ourselves to

1.) Make us feel better about our accomplishments. I did it! it was ME. circumstances didn't work in my favor
2.) Make us not have to feel bad for the suffering of others. They didn't get unlucky and I lucky. They just didn't improooooove!

>>301689
>Most drug free people are obese coomers, vain social media narcissists or gymfags that exert themselves into exhaustion regularly.
Drug habits are just in plain sight and often carry the risk of fucking people up fast but I guess it's safe to say that most people struggle with something such as stimulation addiction, narcissistic brain farts or a dependency on validation. Some of the most fucked up people I witnessed are straight edge and don't even watch porn but they get all depressed if they can't put someone else down or if they don't get attention.

Its also too obvious now that a shitload of 'regular' people have a massive social media and scrolling addiction on top of their fucked up dopamine receptors.

It's really easy to fall into some kind of trap indeed. Doesn't even matter where you are, even third worlders in the most retarded places are scrolling through TikTok all day.

>>301694
Self improvement works to a certain extent but only if its focused on fixing and maintaining. Most self improvement stuff is just fluff but you can definitely improve your life by getting healthier and fit or by cutting out bad influences from your life. Its not rocket science but a lot of people want to become a completely different human being instead of trying to take control of whats in their hands.

Then there's also the retards who start taking TRT for no good reason just because people on the internet told them it's a fix for everything.

>>301695
I think everyone without children cope in better or worse ways. Like you cant believe The amount of 30 yr old normies with less than 5k to their name "just gotta get rich" with a straight face

People with children just care about their family and this is normal and healthy

I just found out that my birth was compicated: I had a brain hemorrhage and asphyxia, and I almost died.
It all checks out. I'm a wiz because I got brain damage since birth.
Anyone here has a history of complicated birth or infancy? I think more of us are brain damaged than we think and it contributed to out mental struggles.

>>301825
>I'm a wiz because I got brain damage since birth.
You chose to not have sex because of something you didn't even know happened until now? What?

I at the point where I don't derive any joy from existing. Get up got to work, go home and get 6 hours of free time to try and mentally escape which is impossible when nothing is worth it. Beat video game, nothing happens. finish reading a book, nothing happens. Make art…cook…on and on. Nothing is going to somehow magically catapult my life trajectory somewhere better.

>>301825
Well, I was born into a narcissist's second family as a project to fix all the mistakes from the first family, was molested as a kid, got hit in the head by a soccer ball (never played the damn sport) and woke up on concrete to half the class around me
This was the last time people paid attention to me in those numbers and I was 8 years old

>>301826
chose because we fail to get pleasure when it comes to mating because we lack the mechanism to have oxytocin or something released when it comes to mating

>>301490
Brother I'm not a debugging output, I'm a self-aware being just like you. Atheism only means that there is no god, nothing worthy of praise, a creator can still exist within atheism but he would not be a god.

>>301512
The point was not that you or myself are not self-aware. I know that I am self-aware, and I assume (without proof) that others are self-aware because it would be difficult to go about my life otherwise. The point I was trying to make was that this self-awareness may not be anything more than a debugging output whereby the body can experience what is going on "under the hood" as it goes about its business. It may simply be a byproduct of how the mind operates rather than the actual process of operation itself. By attempting to dissociate from this debugging output, one can experience relief from the suffering caused by our subjective interpretation of this degugging output (this is the essence of Buddhist beliefs as I understands them).

As for your point about atheism, this is more of a semantics debate but if you are willing to concede that some creator may or may not exist but that he would not be a god that should be worshipped then I agree with you.

>>301514
how do you know there's anything "under the hood" and that, if there is such a thing, it's something utterly different from what you call your (self) awareness or mind?

>>301522
I may not have elucidated what I mean by "under the hood" very well. I was simply referring to subconscious processes which are carried out regardless of whether or not the self is aware of them. It is obvious that many biological functions are entirely subconscious and cannot be directly controlled by conscious thought like the rate at which the heart beats. It may be possibly to indirectly control this to some extent but I will get to that shortly. Going back to the topic of subconscious processes, even things that are normally thought of as deliberate actions are subconscious to some extent. As I type this, my mind somehow knows where every key is located on the keyboard and I can type this out without looking at the keyboard and deliberately moving each finger over every letter. I know the order of the letters of the first row of a QWERTY keyboard and can retrieve that knowledge at will. I do not, however, consciously know where all the letters are but I can retrieve them in a roundabout manner by imagining that I am typing something out. For instance, if I wanted to know where the letter 'X' was, I could imagine typing out the word "Xylophone" and seeing where my fingers want to go (bottom row, left side). If I wanted to consciously exert some control over my heartbeat, I can change my breathing or think of things that would normally make me frightened or anxious to increase the rate at which my heart beats. I cannot, however, directly control my heartbeat. There is some kind of process going on under the hood that automatically responds to stimuli and causes physical changes in my body and this occurs regardless of whether or not it is deliberately induced. This occurs at higher levels than core biological functions. Note how people respond to hearing certain words or phrases. Are they deliberately and consciously changing their facial expressions and body language? Obviously not.

So the question is not whether or not there is anything going on under the hood, but to what extent the biological machine that is the human body is controlled by processes that the self or consciousness that one identifies with is unaware of or is aware of but cannot control directly (processes that are going on "under the hood").

>>301426
I want to die with the belief Ill go back in time and live my life again, this time with knowledge of stocks and bitcoin.

>>301430
it's totally worth it… provided you inherit the home also.

Regards, a non-1st-worlder wiff around 1000$ salary (after taxes tho)

See, I spend around 500$ for the essentials, the other 500$ go to my mom/my brother/occasional expences aka wants


Thrift store hunt gives you a bunch of cool ties/overcoats/leather jackets and such, while "normal stuff" like tees and jeans can be bought for cheap + tailoring isn't expensive

So hey. A grand every month is your best friend possible.

>>277011
thats the case with vitamin D though (and I mean it)

>>301711
>normies
>everywhere

The normies are different; differ one from another on different continents. Many normies would scratch your "weirdness" as foreign-ness.

>>277117

Sure! Grain Brain by Dr. David Perlmutter is popular but controversial.

- He claims gluten, sugar, and carbs can cause inflammation that harms the brain, leading to depression, anxiety, dementia, and even ADHD.
- He recommends cutting carbs, avoiding gluten, and eating a high-fat (sometimes ketogenic) diet to protect brain health.
- Many find his ideas inspiring, especially the focus on diet changes to improve brain function.
- Critics say some scientific claims lack strong evidence, and cutting carbs too much or eating lots of saturated fat might be risky for health.
- Overall, the book is good for sparking thinking about diet and brain inflammation but should be read with caution and medical advice.

HOWEVER

High glycemic index (GI) foods cause quick blood sugar spikes followed by sharp drops, which can lead to brain fog—feelings of tiredness, confusion, and poor focus. Studies show that these rapid glucose changes affect brain regions tied to reward, craving, and cognitive function, sometimes triggering overeating and mental fuzziness. So choosing low-GI foods like buckwheat helps keep blood sugar stable, boosting mental clarity and steady energy.

>>277023
>Wheat today is not the same than it was and also industrial sugars did not exist. Yet it's kinda loose to assume that a healthy diet is needed to actually serve that purpose, many familiars of mine eat horribly and they do not have issues. The anti-carb thing is mostly for schizos with a sensitive gut, even if it still can profit others.

The main issue with "modern food" is that it often means highly processed, nutrient-poor products loaded with added sugars, unhealthy fats, and sodium. These foods:

1. Contribute to obesity, heart disease, diabetes, and even some cancers.
2. Are calorie-dense but lack essential nutrients, leading to poor health despite overeating.
3. Are engineered to be addictive, promoting overeating and cravings.
4. Cause chronic inflammation and blood sugar spikes, which can harm brain and body health over time.
5. Have an environmental toll due to industrial production and processing.

So, while convenient, modern processed foods come with hidden health and environmental costs. Eating whole, less processed foods (like buckwheat!) is a smarter way to go.

>>301644
There are no photos of fish or references to fish being eaten by cats from the first Depression Crawl Thread through the ones made in 2022. If it's in a crawl thread, it would be the /lounge/ one which I don't have archives of. Sorry!

I believe somebody has been manually backing up /lounge/'s Crawl thread on an off-site platform, but I don't give enough of a rat to check!

ive used my sister's hair comb to comb the hair that's on my private region.

Years ago a NYT article was posted here about a monastery's summer program. I went there and got in trouble for talking to the receptionist's teenage daughter.

>>301667
>got in trouble for talking to the receptionist's teenage daughter
Sexhaver behaviour desu

>>301666
Throw it away!

>>301595
What do you want to offer me oh mighty wizard? You are half correct, i am forced by circumstances, the other half is that I hate everything in this world and living. Only reason I suffered unbearable agony so long is that I'm a coward that's afraid of doing anything at all, otherwise I'd obviously be long gone years and years ago.

I have a feeling this poster is a troll, i have seen a thread here several months ago that's very simlilar to this one

>>301599
Why not just flee to another country or something?

>>301600
if u read what i write i told u ive been posting here for months cause i live week to week due to my addiction that will kill me if i run out of pills so i hustle lie scam and lie. and thats 1/10 lethal problems i have. i wish i was trolling cause 10% of what i experience is enough for anyone to rope, im just brain broken and have to be pushed to the absolute edge to finally attempt and probably fail.
>>301603
im from poland and yes im done in this country basically so in theory its not a bad idea. problem is i have no money no health and nothing and u make it seem like jumping countries is like buying groceries. i can go and be homeless in germany maybe and thats the extent of my realistic possibilities.

70% of my tooth is gone, it cracked and fell apart. It's also the tooth that had poison put inside it that civilized countries don't use since it poisons the organism. I can't afford a dentist so my death is up faster. My whole organism is gonna get poisoned idk what might even happen to it. Goodbye.

Thanks Wiz

>>299849
A wizard should know Bysshe Vanolis

"Whence come you in the world of life and light
to this our City of Tremendous Night?"

"I wake from daydreams to this real night."

"For their woe broods maddening inwardly"