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Alcoholism and drug dependence has gone way out of hands. I can't control it anymore.

Wagecucking has been bad, my supervisor keeps tabs on every single fault I make. Or instantly assumes a mistake. This started some months ago when we got into an argument. I am started getting scolded everyday multiple times and this has a very negative effect on me.

I've confided some people I genuinely trust that I am feeling more depressed and tired than before. That thing will only go worse for me. Deep down I am likely to attempt suicide, at 26. My mom just lets me hug her no questions at 26, for minutes. She was physically abusive until I was 25. She punched my face, left me breathless, forgot to take her ring from her punching hand.

This succubus I hate, now I cling so hard to her. I hate life so much, you have no idea.
3 posts omitted. Click reply to view.


Mine isn't overly loud, but he's pretty bad otherwise.

>Ignoring what I say

>Interrupt me mid sentence to talk about random unrelated shit
>Pick me apart
>After I confront him about it, he denies it


Mine is like that too. Everyone here just ignores whatever I say, even questions, unless I'm actually all alone with one of them. And then if I suddenly raise my voice just a little bit higher everyone treats me like I've just screamed at them.


lash out, be entitled, take back what they took from you nobody makes it out alive anyways


I can't. I basically live under his thumb. He will kick me out if I do and destroy my world. There is nothing I can do but bear with it or kill myself. I swear, I'm trying really hard not to lash out, he doesn't do it to purposefully piss me off, but it's fucking hard. I really feel like punching everything in front of me, and I can't even remember the last time I got so pissed about anything.


Meant last beating at 15, not 25

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knowing everything you do in third world will be worhtless makes like exhausting and makes wageslaving incredibly hard

syrian refugees who get handouts in europe earn more than neurosurgeons here

i don't understand how third worlders work so hard. especially the smart ones who study 10+ hours a day to ace the university exam so they can become doctors and earn 500$ / month only to get murdered when child of two inbred retards dies from genetic illness

so no, its better to be a small fish in big pond than to be a big fish in small pond, unless of course you are the biggest fish(sultan)

any other third worlders here?
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$14/hour may seem like a lot, but you have to consider that the cost of living in first world countries is proportionally higher. It's not unusual for a 1 bedroom apartment to rent for $1,500 a month in a major metropolitan area, where the minimum wage jobs pay that much.


But it's still not more expensive than your wages are higher. Some goods like pc and internet are not even cheaper in the third world because we can't produce it here or we lack the experts. I think even food and other materials cost almost the same between some countries due to the ease of international trading. You also have benefits of more advanced infrastructures like useable public transport or government bureaucracy that doesn't require bribing, which improves quality of life and potentially reduce living expenses. I never really looked into this though, so I may be wrong.



In my 3rd world shithole I can rent a decent apartment for like $200-300 a month,in countries like the US you need at least $900 to rent a place in a shitty zone full of niggers.

In those circumstances earning $600 per month ain't that bad,also pretty much everything (except technology) is cheaper here.


I wanted to quote


Nah that's cope. I talked to a /3d/ taxi driver and he lives in a dump, banks money and keeps for his daughter university and owns two apartments back in his home country

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Anybody here has tried to commit suicide but failed and survived it? How was that experience? Did you change your thoughts or anything after that?

I'm genuinely curious


Anyone who tried and failed to kill themselves did not actually want to die. It's incredibly easy to die, the only reason people fail is because they actually want to live and are just doing it to whore for attention.


The ones who fail suicide are probably too rare you're not really gonna find anyone, thankfully there's plenty who """fail""" suicide though and they're usually more than happy to share the experience.


I've tried a couple times and can vouch for this >>220676 mostly, it was more of a non-committal hope that I would die and that it wouldn't be too painful, both times were drug overdoses and they were extremely painful but didn't kill me. Deep down I don't really want to die, I just want to be in a better situation, but I can't think of a way out of what I've been dealt. There are lots of things I don't like about myself, there's things that I can never realistically change, this really bums me out, but I guess I'm not hopeless enough to definitively want to die. Obviously the attempts didn't change my thoughts, the second time I overdosed on drugs it was with even more drugs than the first time, maybe this is just my path, maybe one day I'll try with enough drugs to really die, who knows.

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>If there is someone you really hate, that did something awful to you, I think that you should be able to legally kill them.

Where's the harm in killing somebody that fucked your life? Other people might hate them too, and that means you're doing a public service getting rid of these people. And as we all know, public service is for the greater good, therefore truly good.

I don't see the difference in murdering an animal and murdering a human. I'd never kill an animal personally unless it trying to hurt me so why not applying the same for humans as well.
The state is too biased and slow to take care of these issues. A lot of people suck and they deserve to die, so the world would be better without them. I bet it would feel great.

Also, we all know that most single mothers destroy the lives of their sons, so they should all be murdered as well. The children should also die, so they don't become future inepts. We need to put this planet in order again.

And if you don't know, murder is already legalized, but only for the super rich.

If you have money and are able to find good enough lawyers, you can get away with anything. This is an economic injustice which needs to be rectified. So murder should be legalized so that everyone, rich or poor, can defend themselves against these super rich without being punished.

The super rich should also all be murdered since they are the main reason for wageslavery, which creates worldwide misery. They control the law, so you can't trust in the law to bring true justice.
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Yes. I too beleive murder is sometimes justifiable but to argue for its legality based on “them being a dick” would make courts very messy. It’s sort of like the formality of having a court even when it’s obvious that the person is guilty


Something can be moral without being legal. If you follow your heart and murder people who are fated to die, Heaven will smile on you and allow you to live happily without being shackled by normalfag courts. If you act from an offended ego though Heaven will punish you for telling lies and you will be arrested.


All kinds of intellectual and sexual degeneracy are mainstream right now. Why not allow violence? Seems like the next logical step to me.


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In the opinion of this NEET, murder can be as pure an expression of love as lolicon is a form and most don't understand either and are only hurting themselves and those like them by trying to be cool. You can make ugly videos that get reposted on liveleak but you're the lowest of normal people, thinking you're better than everyone else for emulating a behavior that isn't yours. If you murder people just for the thrill of it, you should know you'd be happier if you just went outside, lived nicely like everyone else and stopped lying to yourself.


Nah, I want to live in a society where I don't have to booby trap my house before going to sleep. I'd agree on dueling laws but not direct killings.

>A lot of people suck and they deserve to die, so the world would be better without them

Some actual harmful criminals are already subjects to capital punishment. If by "suck" you mean people you don't like then the definition is really arbitrary and there is no stopping other people from considering you worth killing because you're a future school shooter who browses the neo-nazi website wizchan or whatever. A society that goes Salem witch trial on everyone they don't like is hell for wizards.

>And if you don't know, murder is already legalized, but only for the super rich.

Good thing the super duper rich who are truly above the law is only like 0,01 percent of society and probably none of us here knows them personally or will ever catch their attention.

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It is my belief that child abuse is a positive thing that we wizards should encourage. Reasons are as follows:

1. Child abuse creates wizards. Most of us wizards here were abused as children. If we were not abused we would likely develop into mindless normalfag npcs. It is a fate worse than death to be a normalfag, and so the pain that we went through as children has ended up helping us in the long run, saving us from being bound to the normalfag wheel of reproduction and death.

2. Child abuse creates realists. By being exposed to pain at an early age like this it quickly dispels the childish illusions that stupid people believe. Abused children grow up to be prudent adults. If you have a child that is coddled all its life it would likely become a foolish optimist who lives in fantasies of good will and altruism. These people will end up consumed by predators.

3. Child abuse makes people hate their parents. All independent wizards must eventually kill their parents, either metaphorically or literally. All parents are normalfags and loving a normalfag makes you a normalfag. Wizards are given the chance to be free from familial fetters through child abuse, we can spit on our parents coffin at their funeral and are immune to suffering granted from being tied up in normalfag relations.

Of course there is always the risk that the wizard will end up being unable to endure the crucible, but that is a justified risk in by opinion.
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Sounds like you're making excuses. You can kill yourself easily with a new knife, and I know from experience that a deep cut like that from a sharp knife doesn't hurt until later, which you won't be experiencing. And even if you live in a hellhole that has banned knives, there are countless other ways to kill yourself. Exposure during winter, head on train tracks, even dehydration if you're really strapped for options


Listen I'm not saying it isn't doable, but you said no one can prevent you from killing yourself, when there's a lot of things trying to prevent you from killing yourself.


Them trying doesn't mean that they're successful at it. No matter what laws are passed, unless they strap you down and shove feeding tubes down your throat there's nothing keeping you from ending your life.


It still makes it much more difficult and adds more consequences if you fail..


seems something a failed academic would say

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What do you wizards do all day to pass the time? Personally for me it's becoming harder and harder to just consume media, especially that which contains succubi in them.
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I make models out of hardened paper or sheet metal. Usually small functional models of guns and their internals. Its fun and keeps my brain active.


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Permanently banned from the only game I play. I can't even ban evade because they recognize my voice because I've tried ban evading multiple times, months apart.

I've sunken into a severe state of depression because I literally have nothing else to do with my time.


Which game, anon?


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It's a Arma 3 Role Play server and it's one of the only good role play servers on the game. (I was literally playing on the server 12+ hours a day)

Going to try to use a voice changer in the future to distort my voice and make it deeper. I will have to buy a steam account, change my IP with my VPN, buy the game again and use a voice changer.


Post more pictures of pedojew and I'll do the job for u

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So I met this guy on a rizon irc chat three years ago. We both share niche hobbies, and we both have a passion in the preservation of retro Japanese video games. We used to frequently chat with each other every day. He went to college and I'm a NEET, but we still had a very good friendship. So, what happened? Well, he got a girlfriend a few weeks ago. Now before this, he has never, ever, had any interest in social media like instagram or twitter, but now he has both. Whenever I try to start a convo, he ghosts me or gives me vague replies. He makes me feel like a fucking monster that's did something so horrible. Like everyone, I have skeletons. I have fetishes that the majority of the human race would consider fucked up, and I hang out in circles that share art and videos of said fetishes. Whenever I get ghosted like this, I'm afraid someone may have gossiped about me or they can tell by my behavior that I'm a nut and they want nothing to do with me.

tl;dr why are people so cruel to their friends when they get girlfriends?
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>Pretty sure his college thing didn't work out and he is back to NEET since he is putting in 50 hours a week in an MMO and also playing other games.

>HA! i noticed him putting 50 hours into an MMO this week! that means his plans didn't work out! he's a loser!

the reason you lost him is that attitude. it gets tiring. you're a loser and find comfort in finding the loser in everyone else.

>He is clearly still into the same shit we always talked about so no reason not to talk again other than feeling awkward.

no, he doesn't talk to you because you lack objecivity and only see the wrong in everyone. for a while it can SEEM beneficial to have a friend like you (point out mistakes), but after a while people realize that no matter what they do and how, you're just going to see how it means they're a failure like you. then they realize they get nothing out of interacting with you and ghost you.


>if I say whats up dog does that make me a nigger?



don't people get banned for admitting this?


Nothing in the rules states you can't have friends, only that you cannot post about going to social gatherings or wanting to.


Are we just the byproduct of sadistic lunatic breeders that wanted to bring children into a world expecting them to be lucky not to become outcasts/ addicts/mentally ill but it did anyways
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There's this chick on youtube who makes videos about AN/efilism. Though she looks suspiciously alike Ligotti.


Amanda, i like her.


i saw her first.



I read it since I am into scifi, gave me a lot of vocab words, but a lot of it was the creator just whining about how awful his creation was. The only interesting sections were narrations by the Monster.


This isn't an attention seeking thread. I'm hoping to learn from someone who relates to me and how he managed to feel a little better. If i can't achieve that, atleast i was able to externalize my worries so i can see them more clearly and vent a little. It's just random thoughts put together really.
I don't think there is anything wrong with being "normal". I believe anything can be an improvement to my dry and monotonous way of living. I've been sheltered my entire life which is why i'm so inadept and incompetent. I'm not talking about social skills (i've always mimicked those to some extent and i i know how to get by i don't care about that). I'm talking about life skills in general. I have no idea how to cook, maintain my hygiene like routines and shaving, paying utilities, etc…
Just the thought of losing my mother, my caretaker, one day makes me anxious and sad. I don't know how to act and think. I don't know how i feel like how do i know i'm feeling this or that at any moment ?
Because of this lifestyle, i had also always been afraid of people. I think i projected how i felt about my parents when i was young into other humans. I never had any serious social contact so i'm afraid of doing anything they deem unacceptable. I'm afraid i will anger them. They will bare their fangs at me, punish and assault me.
I don't care about the world, making it a better place or anything along those lines. I just want to be comfortable and satisfied in my own little cocoon. However i can't even accomplish that because i'm numb. I can't feel pleasure or enjoy anything and it hurts. I don't have any motivation or energy in me, hell i'm even surprised i wrote this much.
A typical day for me involves browsing the internet and watching TV all day. It's just a mindless circle of downloading and deleting, installing and uninstalling usually the same things over and over, switching between tabs and channels every 10 secs hoping something happens and staring at a stale page. Never actively pursuing anything. I never really enjoyed media and i never finish anything i started. I have no inspirations or aspirations really, except some momentary infatuations. They are some shallow obsessions i get from time to time with some occupations like drawing or "computer stuff". I have no specefic skills to be honest so i feel helpless and lost. I then just make excuses like saying it's because my computer is trash or it's because my parents raised me wrong.Post too long. Click here to view the full text.


I suggest asking your mother to teach you some of the basics of looking after yourself. I'm amazed when I realise children are taught how to run a household at like 8 years old but here's me not knowing how to do anything. I am learning the washing machine but it seems weird, anyway start small with these things. Atleast the basics, and don't worry if you can't pick it up well at all because I can't either.


You will learn better when you are put in a situation where you have to care for yourself. As long as your mother is still doing all the household it feels stupid to do something by yourself. It'S not that bad though. Once you live alone you will have a reason to care because otherwise you are surrounded by trash and bugs. When you live by yourself there is not so much to do. Keep the rooms and your clothes clean, do the dishes, buy food and necessary household stuff like toilet paper, cleaning utensils. It all came very naturally to me once I lived alone for about 9 years. Currently living with my parents again and I don't do anything again because my mother does all the work. It feels pointless to do anything now because my mother did all this stuff for decades and she knows nothing else neither does she ask for help. So why bother?


>This isn't an attention seeking thread
fuck you the site itself is for that, you can't deny that every user who posts here wants attention in one way or another else why not keep it to yourself?


I'm basically in the same situation, I don't know the basics about how to obtain a lifestyle that is both healthy and satisfying. My day consists of obsessively browsing the internet, installing and uninstalling games, and stuffing my mouth with junkfood.
Honestly I have no idea how life's gonna be like when my parents die, I dropped out of highschool in a third world country where it's pretty difficult for a college graduate to find jobs let alone a highschool drop out.

>I don't care about the world, making it a better place or anything along those lines. I just want to be comfortable and satisfied in my own little cocoon. However i can't even accomplish that because i'm numb. I can't feel pleasure or enjoy anything and it hurts. I don't have any motivation or energy in me, hell i'm even surprised i wrote this much

The world is a very weird place, I've always viewed it as a humorous movie in which the actor eventually commits suicide due to the unbearable boredom and lack of enthusiasm. Back to the point though, I lack the necessary energy to do anything, I believe my senses are numbed down due to years of emotional stress and abuse. I'm at the prime of my life and I haven't done anything worthwhile my days just fly when all I do is sitting silently in my room.

>I can't achieve any of my goals or get down to my personal projects

At least you have some goals and personal projects you want to work on. I don't even have this luxury, ever since I was a young child I wasn't interested in life, no goals, no hobbies no nothing.

>This lifestyle had also affected my health

My health is shit right now, I'm obese probably diabetic and I haven't exercised in close to 6 years, laying on bed all day long had a very destructive impact on my body. Mentally I'm just fucked also, when I concentrate on something for just two hours, I go all confused with my mouth wide-open like a retard (oh maybe I'm actually a retard) all my life I concluded only one thing that life is inherently evil and if you are a helpless case like me it won't get better you will keep on falling deeper into an endless abyss of self-hatred and mental deterioration until you finally kill yourself.


>At least you have some goals and personal projects you want to work on. I don't even have this luxury, ever since I was a young child I wasn't interested in life, no goals, no hobbies no nothing.
It's the same thing for me. Those goals are just stuff i made up looking at some external stimuli because it catched my attention but i never really thought much about them. It's like a bunch of fantasies i daydream about every once in a while. Like that one time i saw my pc repair guy in his shop and he was stuck in this tiny cramped room with old wires and cas
es on top of each other making two columns and it was a legit mess. I kind of loved that scene.

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8ch /suicide/ board is kill for good.

What's the next best thing?

Are there any good Darknet sites related to committing suicide?


that image can be too impactful for some of us. Please. Mods, can you spoiler that?


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