/dep/ - Depression

Evolution has set it so that females are the root of man's power. As intelligence (increased versatility/creativity in response to stimuli) moved away from bacteria in response to various environmental pressures (lack of food, need to escape predation, etc) forcing larger bodies, the amount of White-matter in the brain of males (how high the forehead/eyebrows are/how effeminate the face is) increased to keep the body functional in response to an increase of gray-matter (original brain matter) from higher intelligence. This increase of white-matter to cover gray matter in males prompted an increase in the amount of white-matter in females as well. In people, this evolutionary history is present in that more intelligent men have smaller testicles (lessens intelligence change from person-to-person by reducing potential people) on average and more white-matter, so when there is a need for a raise in intelligence due to environment, what ends-up happening is an automatic shift toward smaller testicles and more white-matter. The original life was likely a purely asexual Y chromosome bacteria with a brain/brain-plan of near total gray matter. At some point it split into male and female because it had to over-come the challenges it faced to continue its survival as sexual reproduction offered more genetic variability than asexual. Females evolved to mentally lag males in evolution, lack sentience and capability, and to be used and care for males and offspring. Males evolved to be genuinely intelligent, independent, capable and strong in contrast while maintaining an element of insanity or suffer death at all times. Both sexes increased in intelligence as well as everything is 100% hereditary. Every time there was an increase in White-matter due to a need for higher intelligence (higher forehead/eyebrows) there was a new facial standard for murder for food with each species as man moved away from bacteria. This is because all mobile life on earth is condemned to kill their own DNA due to a need for protein, vitamins & minerals to prevent death, so it all demands a brain to commit murder to keep reproduction running. Any brain that did not kill due to too much love for what they see in foreign DNA did not reproduce (encouraging racial discrimination even at 99.9+ DNA shared, etc.). This process happened over 1.05 billion years, and it is made of murder, natural selection, violence, and extreme suffering. It has installed pro-group thinking in the brain of man anPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

Anyone knows how to get into a fight and win and not go to prison or get charges?
I'm very angry and I feel like a loser and I only had some scrambles in school and I always lost.
Recently I joined a gym to get stronger and also a martial art but I'm losing to everyone as they are more experienced than me and this is making me suicidal.

I feel that if I would fight someone and win it would make me feel better but I only see this going bad: I lose badly and get the beating of my life or I fight someone that doesn't fight back and they report me.

I need someone that is around my age and that fights back so the win feels good and I don't want them to call the police.

What kind of person should I challenge? Should I bait them to attack me and then it's self defense? How do I make sure I win?

I just need to feel better than someone. Also, there aren't any streetbeefs and other stuff like that where I live.

Do you think Nietzsche was right about this? I think there may be something to it. Normals are so fragile, especially succubi, they refuse to even consider bad scenarios and how horrible existence can be at times. It takes courage to contemplate negative thoughts and emotions. Pessimism is a sign of high vitality, of a brave spirit, of an ascetic soul who doesn't think feeling good all the time is necessarily desirable.

thread for discussing more Theory than Practice. terror management theory(TMT), Psycho-history(loyd demausse),cosmicism etc
So far Im reading a lot to see wether deat =timeless eternal void. And IF thats true,seeing how I cope.
Im also putting stuff into perspective by reading every day,both micro biology and Microbial sentience and far-future timeline and massive cosmic events.

All my life at least since I was like 8 different people would pick on me for no reason or betray or abandon me. I never bothered anybody yet people would be hostile or bully me out of nowhere. Friends would stop talking to me or become hostile to me without explanation, or wouls it be enough for somebody to say something bad to one of said friends to become hostile to me after years. This continued in high school. I managed to have a sort of group of friends but the same thing happened. There was for example a guy who I was ok with him and outta nowhere he refused to greet me and would look at me making smug faces and outright started bothering me at recess one day. Later years people would be extremely harsh with me for stuff they would pass or ignore on other people. For example there was a succubus (she was a neo nazi and very fucked up in the head) who I was sorta friend for a year yet she became hyper hostile against me for a small comment I once made to her. To the point of reacting aggressively and never talking to me again and doing bad comments against me every once. This continued even in college. I even tried to confront politely friends who suddenly for no reason stopped talking to me and all I got was evasives or staring at me like a soulless npc or even aggressions.

Same thing in the street, if there's a beggar or my country's version of the jogger he'll come to bother me outta all the possible people. There were weaker and weirder people at school yet none of those were picked, ever. And the only time I fought back I was called a violent monster by succubus classmate (I only slapped the bully on his face. He once stomped 3 times the head of another classmate, yet I'm the violent…)

I tried everything, from being nice, to being "myself", I've thought it was a punishment from god or karma and accepted it for a while (which fucked me up mentally even more). Yet to this day I don't even understand why people are like this with me

For the record I'm average and almost always used to dress normal, with nothing strange. Nowadays I'm mostly a silent character and dress "aggressively" (like a bodyguard, with sunglasses and everything) and carry pepper spray, and weapons just in case and even tough people avoid me more, I can notice when some people take that same approach, like they want to be hostile with me for no reason but since I don't give them any reason to do so by being as irrelevant as possible, they like sPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

I just have to get through this week edition

                                

I have no doubt this subject is not unheard of here.
It goes like, I still get massive scream-inducing "cringe" over stuff that happened mainly over two years ago. As a matter of fact I feel like I have unlocked the bulk of my consciousness over the last two years or so (I am in my late teens). When thinking about the times I have made a fool of myself, I can't help saying aloud words that make no sense together in the meantime - which does really add to my feeling pathetic. Since I also obviously can't dissociate the people involved in my past from my past itself - provided they don't rub it in themselves -, being forced to be around them gets unduly bad.

Is anyone else planning to go out(die)but only after having done\die due to, a riotous mix of steroids,supplements,and benzos? or even drugs?
Ill be clear, I have a psychiatrist whom I can TRICK into giving me the strongest benzos. or go trough periods of 0 benzo ie;unmedicated. Alcohol, drugs, and muscle building shut. why not? I wont attract any succubi anyway nor do I want to. but being imposing,fearsome before normoloids would be blissful.
i know this is deadly and i will be ded within a couple of years after I go trough this
(also i wont over eat or indulge in taste food,but rather do long fasting for that sweet endogenous HGH)

What do you want to say about this passage?


If you really want to become a part of those few people in this world that have transcended the world, you have to do what they did.
The first prerequisite: Shut up. Be quiet. Stop debating. Stop arguing. Stop trying to prove a point. Even if someone knows something that you don't, whether they share it with you or not, makes no difference, for you have to come up with your own truth. There's really no one in this universe that can hand you realization on a silver platter.

Number two: You have to let go. You have to let go so completely that it becomes scary. You have to totally let go mentally. You have to stop depending on person, place or thing for your self-worth. You have to start depending on the infinite invisible, on what you cannot see, taste, touch, or smell or feel.

Number three: You must look at the world but never react to anything. You must watch your feelings and your emotions, observe them, and as they come into contact with you, you must become the witness, realizing that you are not those emotions. You are not your bad temper. You are not the depression. You are nothing that goes on in this world.

Number four: You must develop a tremendous humility, a stupendous humility. This is more important than anything else. If someone tells you something that you don't like to hear you do not become upset. You do not hold it in. You let it go through you and it dissipates, for it has no energy except the energy you give it. You are responsible to yourself. If you fool yourself you're just going to get disgusted in the end and give up all spiritual life, for you'll say you've gotten nowhere, nothing has happened, it doesn't work. It doesn't exist.
I suppose this is the reason I am with you. To tell you, "Yes, there is an invisible realm of perfection beyond this world, interpenetrating this world, that makes this world look like kindergarten." Yet you must be able to see it yourself.

Number five: You have to want it so much that you don't want it. You have to have such a strong desire to be free that all desire stops. When all desire stops there is a quietness, a stillness, that takes place within you. It is only when this stillness, this quiet- ness, comes when you're able to see clearly, not with your physical eyes, but with your spiritual eye, not with your little I, not with the I-thought, but with the I-am. And you will see in all directions. YPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

Is anyone else here ugly?
And by ugly I mean fucking ugly, to the point you get ostracized from society.
I had cystic acne when I was a teenager (I'm in my early 30s now) and that left me with scars all over my face, I also have facial seborrheic dermatitis and a very oily T-zone. I'm also a bald manlet and I'm hairy like a gorilla. When I talk to people I can see how they struggle to look at my face. They usually get watery eyes after a while of trying to have a conversation with me and they have to look away to clean their eyes. I'm a fucking monster. This has affected every single area of my life. I have been a NEET for years, not because I want to, but because I have no choice. The few times I've ever gotten a job I got bullied by all my coworkers, even my bosses. They always conspire against me to get me fired as soon as possible because they don't want to see my ugly face anymore. I have spend so much money on skincare and treatments, but nothing ever works. Even my own family members bully me, they're extremely cruel to me and celebrate every bad thing that happens to me, I think they're waiting for my parents to die to see if I kill myself. Almost everybody I know hates me for no apparent reason other than because I'm ugly. I have always tried to be a decent person and I have always treated people with as much respect and kindness as I can, but all I have received in return are insults and humilliations. Over time this has affected my mental health and I'm at my wits' end. This is like a curse and I just don't know what to do anymore.