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What’s the point of suicide if you have at least one thing you enjoy in life? Why not keep enjoying it until you kick the bucket from old age or cancer or whatever else? I really don’t see the point in suicide since it’s so boring. I’m gonna die eventually so why not wait a while longer before I die? I could only understand it if you were going through an intense physical pain every waking moment of your life that could not be alleviated. Mentally I don’t think there’s a pain great enough for me to want to end my life when I know there is still something I enjoy in life.
9 posts omitted. Click reply to view.


Suicide should be considered when theres more bad things than good things, like a balance, if there is 10kg of bad things but 1kg of good things, suicide should be considered, if there is 1kg of bad things and 10kg of good then suicide shouldnt be considered.


There are also parts you must suffer through that you really don't enjoy. When you barely enjoy anything at all, it's simply not worth it. Like say you enjoy anime, but then your computer breaks and you can't buy a new one, then what are you to do? You have to suffer being a wage slave for a time to buy a new one, this is assuming you have somewhere to live and can eat for free. If you happen to not be born in country that gives you a free house and food and have to do all sorts of shit day in and day out just to survive, it becomes a drag on the soul. It's tough to resist and keep going even with the help of instinct driving everyone along. Some people just give up.


>you enjoy anime, but then your computer breaks and you can't buy a new one, then what are you to do?
you start dreaming anime


because doing that one thing that you enjoy just isn't worth it. if you like anime but hate everything else about your life then who can blame you for calling it quits early. Everything can also go perfectly but with a shitty brain it doesn't matter.
Ultimately though life just wears you down. Some people can overcome it and move on with their life. Others get grinded down until there's nothing left and eventually, they break.


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Wizzie, I’m very afraid of what might happen to me. I don’t even think I’ll live past 40. I got IBS, sebhorreic dermatitis, now exfoliating dermatitis with these random scaly patches (pic related) that I scratch and they turn into scabs that don’t heal well. The one pictured here has taken almost a full month just to heal and it’s still healing. I have no idea what the fuck is wrong with me but my doctor father told me it was nothing. That all of this was fucking nothing and that I have severe anxiety about my health and basically delusional.

I’m very scared and I don’t know what to do, I was thinking of maybe calling my crazy mother to help me but she automatically asks my dad about health related issues concerning me. So she wouldn’t be of any use.

I don’t even have health insurance because I had relied on my dad for so long. Now I think that was a mistake.

What the fuck should I do wizzie?
7 posts omitted. Click reply to view.


Don't worry.

- le Demiurge


haha wtf this is nothing, my skin looks like white bumps all over, it's itch all the time, stop being a child


I need some alcohol


How are you feeling today my fellow paranoid wiz?
I was wondering, I assume that you are dependent on your father regarding the food you consume? If not, and If you can chose what you eat then have you considered having a strict healthy diet?

A good diet can do wonders for skin problems.


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Not a doctor, so don't blame me when you die, but pretty sure everyone has those. Heck, if I hunted over my body right now, I'd probably find at least a couple, but I won't, because I'm not paranoid.

Pretty sure you're just suffering from severe anxiety.

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I have no family anymore. I cut ties with everyone and it's been months, and it was pretty much only "mommy and daddy" and I'm an only son.

If you still have some kind of "loving" relationship with any relatives, cherish that. You'll know what's to be truly alone when you're alone, living by yourself by any means, with no communication from your relatives, with that burning desire to legally change your name.

And I won't lie, my fellow wizard brother, it hurts. If I was inhuman and bitter with a family, I'm even more inhuman now. A fellow wizard is the closest thing to family I have, do you know how does that feel? I hope you not. I'm numbing that weekend blues with a bottle of Bombay Sapphire and some downer pills. And some grapefruit, that's important too. But the blues is 24/7.


OP here, I know the feeling. I almost killed my dad in the middle of a phgysical fight, right in front of my mom. I realized and I simply let go, and he started shoving and pushing me. My dad is weak, i didn't care, but he unleashed one of our dogs on me, got bitten everywhere, even in the face. He also called the police, then told them not to come and they came anyways, making everything worse; even though I told both my parents I was leaving home for the third time.

Before all that shit, we were getting along and I started loving them at 25. An impulsive thing triggered a discussion and fight. I miss the feeling that we were finally getting along, after many years of abuse and neglect. I can't definitely not forgive my dad for what he did that night: and my mom knows I will never forgive her for my physical and abusive childhood,

But I till fuckign miss we were getting along, as a fucking family. i cried that night and I never let myself cry in front of everyone. Almost got shot by police. Had the mistake of disclosing them I'm a psychiatric patient and legally crazy.

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Lately, with the popularity of Discord, Twitch, and Twitter, I don't remember ever feeling so out of my element than I do now.
Pushing 24, I feel too old to be joining discords riddled with disingenuous teenagers, or arguing/shitposting about any sort of medium. The problem with that is if its the only form of social interaction you have had in your adulthood, it can be difficult not feeling like you've stumbled yourself in a void.

I sit here a couple months before turning 24, realizing what helped me cope well into my adolescence is unlikely to help me any form at this point. I know the solutions, but…

Anyone feel similar?
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whats the OP manga?


Could be Freesia, not sure though.



You're 24, what the fuck are you talking about. You got an online community right here. I'm 25 and I know there will always be wizards here, there will always be wizards around. There will always be a place for the most isolated, social rejects of the world.

There are wizards over 30 right here. Age doesn't matter when you realize some shit in life, but I won't mention that.


This is how it feels when I go to youtube videos of things that were popular from when I was a kid (90s) and realizing that the comments are full of teenagers from nowadays and their unoriginal, self unaware, meme comments.

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Does anyone ever get the impression when visiting a doctor that they despite your sex or your race and that they wish you would just die and don't want to help you? They play nice but when they phone in their treatment I sometimes wonder if I'm doing anything except giving someone info with which to destroy me.
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they swerved you, dude, pretended to be nice and then showed their true colours.


Appearances aside, I'm just upset that we let such slimy people handle anything of importance, such as health.




>Have you ever worked a customer service job? If not imagine having to deal with people constantly and always having to appear to care.
See, this always baffled and infuriated me.
I worked many customer service jobs, I dealt with people constantly and I always showed them proper care and respect. It was hard but doable and I consider myself a misanthrope that avoids parties and social events like fire.

This new concept shared on social media that doing your job proper is somehow impossible in customer service is a shitty excuse for bad work ethic.
If I could do it then the fucking Stacy can do it too anon.

Still, I am not delusional.
My primary psychiatrist that I've been with for years abandoned me once the money was tight. It was pretty hurtful but still a reminder that doctors rarely care even if they should (especially regarding mental health problems).


Don't go down the line of thought, OP.

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 No.202204[Reply][Last 50 Posts]

Post here when you don't have enough to say for a topic and it's too depressing for the general crawl thread.
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> If you say Gods exist and coverse with you or that the shadows are infested with dragons and are a secret resource used for fueling magic
But you'll just be saying it. Lying is easy. Beliefs can't be crafted. And while your interpretation can change, you aren't the one that can change it. You didn't end up the way you are by your own design. You fell. And now you stumble like everyone else. You can't see it which is to your benefit, but from over here your life looks like any other.


Lurker here.
just wanted to say that I do appreciate your long posts




You noticed that too, aye? I just can't keep up with people outside of this board.


A bit late for you, but I've had about 2 years and in the first few weeks they will most likely try and make you do mindfulness, i.e. "identifying and then eliminating your negative thoughts", and if that doesn't work, then it just is nothing, from then on in my case at least it was "you should go for a walk and take your phone with you" or "why don't you see me as a friend?" and shit like that, or as I like to call it, a waste of time that served no purpose

[Last 50 Posts]

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My mom's boyfriend is so upset that I got sick and took the day off he's started unplugging the internet. It's not like I chose to get sick.
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Single mom chaser detected


There are only two ways any human can help me - break down my door and put a bullet in my brain, or stay far away from me and pretend I don't exist. I am 100% certain that any human willing to go after a single mother isn't going to do either.


>single mother
What happened to the father? Was the mother just a whore or did the father get into a deadly incident and die? In most cases the mothers are whores. I never hear anything about single fathers, but I'd rather be raised by a single father than a whore.


Say, father goes to another succubus
>Single mothers are whores by definition
wow dude, your logic is flawless


I honestly don't know. For years they'd argue and bicker nearly every day for the tiny handful of hours they were both at home and not at work, then suddenly one day the father is gone and they have apparently broken up. The mother goes on to resume the arguing with her daughter and it has continued up until this day, except the two also shout and slam doors in the mornings as well as the evenings. I was living in my own world of escapism, so I never found out what happened, and it is impossible to do that now.

That father married a succubus from his work within a couple months though, and that's all I know. Haven't seen him or even heard his voice in years. Don't remember what he looked like, I suspect I wouldn't even recognize him anymore and neither would he. I'm a completely different person and he isn't the current me's father anyways.

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Recently found out it's common for parents to hug their children, however mine never hugged me.
The only hug I've received/given was a teacher at my high school graduation, everyone else hugged and I didn't want to be the odd one out.
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are ye drunk right now, dude? you're poasting in the wrong thread.



very good, sober life sucks.


My mom died a couple months after I was born. My dad was too stoic to do hugs - he would physically beat me though or whip me with a belt. As you can imagine, I grew up thinking its gay to show emotion and weird to touch people.


physical affection is necessary for a healthy psychological development. it's also pretty much a necessity in mental health. it's the reason why old people get pets. wouldn't be surprised if the majority of wizards weren't appropriately touched enough as kids. i know i wasn't


Are you happy or sad to know we,ll be the last wizards ever to grace this planet?

If you are a "young" 25 year old wizard like me, the internet raised you and your thoughts, and the internet was a lonely place back then (anti-normie internet)

I see people younger than me. Same weird hobbies, similar behaviour, BUT they were born and raised by the normie internet, full of people and social media. So people that would be rejects now, just find other would-be rejects and socialize and turn into normies. This is something we didn't have, our internet age was limited to forums.

I see 1990-1995 as the last generation of pure blood wizards, 1996-1999 as potential hybrid wizards, and post-2000 destroying the existance of newborn wizards.

I personally feel happy and proud. We have a very esotheric cult going on, in every sense of the word. What started as a joke became something bigger than itself.
1 post omitted. Click reply to view.



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If there's one thing I despise it's that everything we love became mainstream. I guess it gives me a sense of superiority that we were doing it all way before it was ever cool, but still. Fucking normalcunts always steal everything.


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>Fucking normalcunts always steal everything.
I get assblasted about this a lot. It seems like it all started with the fake nerd thing and it just keeps expanding with the normals ironically liking shit as a fashion statement. A prime example is this bullshit https://comicbook.com/anime/2019/06/18/sdcc-exclusive-funko-pop-dragon-ball-evangelion-rwby-anime/

I know this thread isn't about anime, but I'm just sperging here. It's infuriating how pseudo-weebs and ironic autists are considered cool, while weebs are looked down upon (the way it should be). I know so many ironic weebs irl and it pisses me the fuck off because I've been aware of hiding my power level for years.

I'm aware of my cognitive dissonance here as this is essentially the same as the cultural appropriation argument, which I disagree with.


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Honestly speaking, most of Japanese media is trash with zero artistic value and operates the same way any normalfag-oriented media in the West does, especially nowadays.
When people partake in waifu wars, create stale memes about same things, get sucked into the vicious cycle of seasonal anime watching and discussion just to not find themselves out of the loop — you understand that the weeb crowd was never really different from people obsessing over various Netflix series, GoT or Rick and Morty, if not worse, considering the bitter sense of group superiority and elitism anime communities shrouded themselves in. But despite all this, they were bound to become just as accepted and eventually merge, becoming part of a whole.


95? Lol no. 92 at best. You personally were born 94, reached 18 in 2012 when the social media thing was in full swing.

>So people that would be rejects now, just find other would-be rejects and socialize and turn into normies. This is something we didn't have, our internet age was limited to forums.

You did have, *especially* the after-92s. If you were willing to risk what little reputation you had, and possibly your well-being, there were quite a few meet-ups happening in different place. (So you were kinda fucked if you lived in a very isolated region that had fuck all going on.)

And since your generation had apps/youtube/wikis/reddit and entered the "geeks are cool" era we're in today, it was a lot whole easier for you.

>I personally feel happy and proud. We have a very esoteric cult going on, in every sense of the word.

You haven't got *anything* going on. You don't understand, they can take EVERYTHING. I mean, look at wizchan now, filled to the brim with "truwiz" teens and 20-somethings who never reach wizardhood. Somehow, someway wizardary will be incorporated into the whole, in a way that you can't argue with. I mean, this anon here>>202900 still assumes there are real geeks and fake geeks.

It's a very fleeting feeling that you have currently have. What you should be doing is making money so that you can live the rest of your life at a decent level of comfort.

(The world seems to be twisting into bizarre shapes, so there's that to look forward to.)

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