/dep/ - Depression

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What's the most depressing premise for a show you can think of? If someone comes up with an absolutely soul-crushing premise, try to one-up them. Make Nana's Everyday Life look like child's play.

So say i have 1300 in neet money monthly, would that be enough to sustain myself/live off alone.
I really want to move out but my parents say i need to save that money. They are against it. They say it's not enough money to live off anyway.

I've been job searching for over a year now, no luck so far. The worst part is still being stuck at home.

I would do so much if it meant a chance to go back to those times, when life was carefree, where I didn't have to do anything to be loved, I simply needed to exist, everyone just treated me like I was so special, a true gift, but now there are so many expectations to live up to, responsibilities, you're expected to either work or starve, or, if you become a NEET like me, a lifestyle where you don't work, but still have your basic necessities taken care of, either by government or parents, you're looked down on and, if you leech off your parents like me, eventually they get sick of it, sick of you, even though none of us asked to be here in the first place. I wasn't suicidal back then, at all.

Perhaps my nostalgia is the reason I live the way I do, doing nothing except staying in my room, endlessly consuming media based on my favorite characters, which haven't changed at all since my childhood, I'll read, watch and most of all play whatever I can to pass the time, as I did all of those years back, and even though it does help distract me from it all, it's just not the same, back then I'd spend all day long playing with my video games and toys, like now I guess, but there weren't any thoughts in the back of my mind, about how I should be doing other activities instead of this, like studying, helping around the house, looking for a job, working, anything to justify my right to exist.

I just enjoyed life, with this odd belief that I was special somehow, that everything would always work out afterall for me. I was wrong, so wrong. I can still feel pleasure, but it's an empty pleasure that doesn't last and is simply replaced by my own despair as soon as I stop to think about everything else, the reality of my own current situation in life. I'll never feel something like the pure joy of my parents buying me a new toy or video game from my beloved franchises, or the excitement of watching a new episode from my favorite cartoon, or the beautiful feelings of being good enough. I miss when I didn't resent life, when it was about pleasure, and I could actually enjoy that pleasure.

I've been feeling increasingly empty and despondent. Nothing seems to bring me joy like it used to. I don't love anyone but don't hate them. Is this the last chapter to my life?

I had always felt like an other online but it wasn't until 2017+ and especially the past two years I feel old online.

It seems as if my fellow netizens all vanished and everyone is a teenager or talks like one. I do not socialize but when viewing comments on youtube or on other websites including sadly here I will notice strange use of language that is similar to baby babbling and doesn ot express more than a single idea.
>finna mad cap
For example is repeatedly posted on the interweb and I do not understand what any of it means.

I am unsure if age is entirely a factor and it could be the isolation that causes this feeling of being out of touch because I have stumbled across older people talking on reddit getting along fine.

People do not seem to want to have discussions anymore online and instead post a meme or use a few words to express themselves.

I cannot be the only one who is experiencing this phenomenon.
I think social media is the cause because a lot of us have been terminally online for decade(s).

I think I've come to the end of the line. I'm 27 years old, almost 28 and I'm currently a college student. I never wanted to attend college, but my parents wouldn't give me any money unless I did. I tried to get a career out of high school but ended up working a bunch of dead end jobs that didn't pay enough to live and made me want to kill myself.

At the same time, I also went to community college to make my parents happy, but didn't have any plans and failed a bunch of classes not attending or doing any work. After my latest career failure, I decided to finish up at community college and transfer to a state university. The reason for this was not that I wanted to attend college, but that I wanted to get away from my parents house, which was a very bad environment as they constantly fight and scream at each other. I couldn't pay for my own housing and have no friends, but knew they would pay for my housing if I went to college.

This was 1 year ago, and the classes were all online because of covid, so I didn't even get to leave my parents home. However, a few months ago they paid for me to have an apartment, since things are dying down and classes might be in person next semester (none of my are, but I didn't tell them that). The classes are a complete waste of time, and I have a 3.9GPA with barely any effort, but I enjoy living alone in my apartment and not working a wageslave job.

My plan was to graduate in the spring, however I realized today that because of my poor planning there are tons of graduation requirements that I haven't filled. There is no way that I'm going to graduate. It would take probably another full year of classes, things I am not interested at all, bullshit classes like racial justice studies and what not. I have no significant work history just a bunch of shitty jobs, no degree, no social connections, and no real special skills that apply to careers.

The conclusion seems to be that I am backed into a corner. In the spring, the money my parents have given me for my apartment will run out, and I will not graduate college with a degree or any career. No job I am qualified for will pay for my living expenses. Unless I somehow find a pot of gold under a rainbow somewhere, I have nowhere to go, except possibly back to my parents who I would prefer to never see again. I think I will have to commit suicide or possibly join all the homeless people who live in the streets, or go to prison. I honestly don'Post too long. Click here to view the full text.

Discuss the ways out of our eternal suffering in this thread. Good death to everyone!

Is living worth it or no?

Sometimes I wish I was never born. Sometimes I hate life so much that the only thing stopping me from killing myself is the thought that my death will make my parents greatly unhappy.

I have now just finished college, having to be among normalfags there was very annoying and ehausting (like in school but slightly better). I don't want to marry or have kids, I don't wanna have a day job which requires a lot of human communication.

I only went to college because my parents wanted me to and encouraged. Studying itself was relatively easy but I hated being forsed into social situations.

Sooner or later parents will force me to find a job (they aren't hurrying though since we are mor or less financially secure). If it leaves a lot of free time and requires little to no communication with people - I'm fine with that. But if it requires both - hell no, I'd better kill myself.

Your thoughts?

i have literally never gotten scared about dying. i think it is a huge comfort knowing that i don't have to live forever in this dogshit life. think "i have no mouth and i must scream". however, i noticed that when normalcattle are reminded that they are going to die, they just get ass ravaged. nothing destroys them more than when someone dies. and they have to cope with all these shitty funeral rituals and religion to try and make themselves feel better. what is so scary about it? i mean it is just a natural fact. everybody who ever lived died. even the king of the jews they love so much.

i think the normalcattle of today live in a fantasy like dream world, and they are so detached from reality that they think they can just be young and have sex and consume whatever is popular at the given time and wageslave for their boss for all eternity. i imagine their conception of social roles like small children playing with fisher price "little people" toys. they think people are defined by their social standing and any sort of inequality that makes my life a living hell is justified because people are where they should be and they aren't "entitled" to anything. so it just shatters their narrow worldview when someone dies because it reminds them that they themselves are going to die, and knowing that they are going to die makes all of their life meaningless. all that social stuff just exists in their heads and at the end of the day they are just animals.

i guess it must be easy to love life when you get everything handed to you and the biggest hardship you faced was getting grounded by your parents for drinking at a party in high school or getting cheated on by your girlfriend. these people have never known what its like to be unloved, have actual disabilities, have childhood trauma, or be stuck in abject poverty working jobs you hate. i have lived through plenty of things scarier than just dying lol.

The world is just fucking insanity now. The internet has been so warped by memes and AI that it’s just unintelligible noise. And when I get off the computer it doesn’t stop. I have to sit in a room for 8 hours with a mask even though everyone in said room has a vaccine, and every person in said room was tested to make sure they were not sick. Nothing makes sense anymore. Everyone I trusted is a snake. Everything real is a projection, it isn’t really there. I don’t know what to do. I’m waving trying to go to school, but I think I should just drop out and go sell weed. Drugs are my only defense against the insanity of the world because they make me just as insane. My fleeting moments of human connection are becoming so a rare as to be nonexistent. Did everyone lose their mind or did I? Where did the people I used to talk to go?