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This situation causes me a lot of depression. Wonder if anyone here has experienced the same and can help.

Years ago when I was a neet and had infinite free time, I indulged in fapping like a psycho. Was doing it ridiculously often and was chasing the "high" of finding new stuff to fap to that didn't just "do the job" but excited me, which was getting progressively harder as my tastes have never really deviated much from things you'd find on mainstream sites, there were just very particular qualities I was looking for, and the "stock" of new material that hit the mark was dwindling fast. One day I woke up after a particularly excessive multi-fap prior day and was having trouble getting hard. Could only fap until I came with a limp dong. Started freaking out. I waited a few days without porn or jacking and then my cock was behaving well and was super hard for a while. Went back to business as usual and by a month later my dick was shit again.

Ever since it's been pretty mediocre, hit and miss, takes a while for me to finish and is often an annoying amount of effort.

Urologists can't find anything wrong so based on how it all started I'm guessing I've fried my brain's arousal centers with porn.

Problem is if I don't ejaculate before trying to sleep it's really fucking hard to get to sleep and stay asleep, because as part of the shitty habit formation with this stuff I started cooming before sleep daily.

I hate being in this fucking hole so much and wish I could just stop with porn and fapping completely but then my insomnia gets out of control.

Anyone been through this? Any advice? It's driving me fucking mad. Fapping was one of the few simple pleasures I had, being a super loser, and now it's just a miserable chore.
21 posts omitted. Click reply to view.


Bros i just love to fap how the FUCK do i stop


reroll your will power stat


dont, just find other things to preoccupy your time with (like uh, videogames, and hobbies (lol))


For me having things to do/fall back on that are easy helps. Being healthy so I have the mental focus to do stuff is also important, if you are unhealthy and can't focus on things it'll be much easier to fall for that then find better hobbies.


WTF! THE SAME THING HAPPENED TO ME! Wizzies how long until my cock gets hard again?

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My past hit me.
I denied one situation from my consciousness for a long time.
One situation from my childhood probably damaged my whole life.
Long time ago, when I was a teenager at school somebody aimed laser pointer at my eyes. My eyes hurt badly, so I went to eye doctor (but I went to eye doctor after one month, for one month I suffered a lot with my eyes, I felt so much pain almost all the time, because my mother and family told me that I m hypochondriac and everything will be fine and I dont need to see a doctor). But at least my mother sent me to eye doctor. Better late than never as they say.

My doctor showed me then picture of my two eyes and the picture showed that one eye is damaged very badly, while damage in second eye seemed to be much lesser in comparision to the second eye. Eye doctor assigned me medications and pills and thats all. My eyes stopped hurt and I felt better after taking medications. Homever, from that day one my head hurts in the back from time to time.

Homever thats not all. Laser pointers are very dangerous. Damage from laser pointer may be long time not visible. Your eyesight may be perfect, you may see not much effects, but in the future problems would appear (in worst case scenario you could be blind). Its basically uncurable, when your eyes are already damage. There's no cure.

What worries me the most is not that I may be blind in the future, what worries me most is that I dont know when I will be blind. I live in uncertainty. I wish I could at least know how long my eyesight will be good and when it would be over for me.

Therefore, even if you have a bad life, be glad that at least your health is good.
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that's just like, your opinion, man.


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I just wonder, if damage in one eye is a lot more serious than damage in second eye, would that mean that in the future firstly I will be blind only in one eye and some time must pass to be blind in second eye also?


Why would it get worse with time? The damage has already been done it will probably not get much worse, you will just have normal degradation from senescence like everyone else.


No, you're wrong.
>As the laser power increases, the chance of eye injury increases. Even blinking may not help. Laser beam can cause permanent blind spots. This has been known to happen in people who stared into the laser on a dare by others, inebriated individuals and uninformed, innocent victims. If the person was looking straight at the laser, the burn will be in the center of a person’s vision. In extreme cases of eye damage, central vision could be almost fully lost, and the person becomes permanently legally blind in that eye. This is similar to the damage seen by people staring at a solar eclipse without protection.
>central vision could be almost fully lost

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Isn't all just so tiresome, the endless struggle for existence. Why is my existence such a burden, I don't even know what to do anymore. We just go onto imageboards just for stimuli, to absorb information for other reason then to distract ourselves from the fact that there is no meaning, we came here into the world from the will of another forced to suffer. The only solace I have is that I will no longer partake in the world, I will only be a passive observer, I will never be subservient to the will. It's just depressing that I am forced to partake in society, because my parents want me to be a wageslave. I wish I could just stay cramped up in my room all day, I hate going outside and seeing normalfags.
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So then why is it that people who argue for suicide in the loudest manner are still alive obviously? Confuses me always. If life is so hard on them how can they go on living?


>Why are all the people I hear argue for suicide alive!?
Why do you think, you fucking retard?


I think because they don't want to die actually. What do you think?


You think the corpses of those who have followed through with suicide should be the ones loudly advocating for it? You're clueless.


No, I don't think anyone who is alive should advocate for suicide ever. You either do it because you actually think it is the solution to your problems or you roleplay on imageboards as the epic doomer kid who encourages others to commit suicide while he hasn't done it himself. You can't advocate for suicide while you yourself are alive, otherwise you come off as a hypocrite.

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How do I cope with being unable to fap for medical reasons while being a virgin and an extreme anti social person?
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The key is to not accumulate sexual tension. Don't fantasize, don't look at anime succubi even. And if you feel like you getting hornier, walk 5 km or lift weights. I am not trying to gymratting or anything, but it is the truth - sexual tension can be killed by limited physical activity.


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You should already be knowing that low energy people like wizards can only get more and more weakened by ejaculation.

If now you come to say you have to actually cope with not doing something that is slowly killing you. I do weight lifts and sometimes take sunbaths in the morning, if you have energy enough for that.

How mean.

Where did I leave my old no-fap helpers list? It's not enough to restrain yourself, but what must be done to adopt such life routines that this energy gets depleted without going downhill into such inner tensions:
>stop eating stimulant foods like meat, coffee, pepper…
>research ayurveda pages to know how to regulate "pitta dosha"
>practice some exhausting (and it has to be so) sport, let it be resistance or HIIT
>keep your gaze away from whatever excites it
>use cold showers, specially into the genital area. Do not use ice if you do care for your skin.
>Stop eating industrial crap and dairies at least

After I entered a fully alcaline diet my pollutions are reduced notably. But I can't tell if I will be able to withstand this for long, it's told to have consequences in unprepared bodies.


Enough with your bullshit you no-fap schizo.


Also, having somatized issues might be a factor about erotomania and might pollutions.


Cool, more of this mystical norm-brainwashing. You dared to post this again. Nice. So you continue to preserve your semen until you finally meet "that special someone"? So cute.

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I just have to get through this week edition

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So this is the real world. This is what the majority of humans are doing. They strive for this, they fight tooth-and-nail over the opportunity to do this.
This is what my life has been leading up to and what I will be doing for the rest of it:

Moving stuff to other movers of stuff so that everyone involved can continue to afford continuing the moving of the stuff.

There are people who aren't part of this endless circle of moving stuff to other movers of stuff so that the stuff can continue moving between movers of stuff.
I don't know who they are and I will never be one of them.
They never have to move stuff or worry about whether they will continue being able and allowed to move stuff.

One day I will be gone and my tomb stone won't even say "Here lies Anon, he moved stuff".
I'll just be ashes mixed in with the ashes of billions of other movers of stuff. There will be some grassy hill outside of town under which all these ashes of billions are buried. The hill will have a sign "People who moved stuff". The hill will be grassy for a few years until the neglect makes it a filthy dirt mount with a sign reading "Stuff". The cheap labor used to bury our ashes will lead to streams of black mud appearing on the outskirts of town when it rains. Nobody is completely sure of what this filth is; only that it is probably waste material and thankfully it drains into the sewers where it fucking belongs.

One day the unstable, polluted patch of cheap land from which toxic black goo once oozed will be purchased by Amazon or Walmart and they will construct another warehouse on top of it. The warehouse will be filled with stuff to be moved by people to other warehouses across the realm.


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Welcome to reality wiz, you aren't the chosen one and you aren't special whatsoever like me. I think we both will end up being wagecucks till we die lonely and miserable, but at least when we die we will be free from this torture. No more thoughts, no more pain, emotions or feelings, just eternal peace…


What is it with normies and working for such massive shitty companies?
I would rather be, and have been, homeless because of my refusal to work for a company like that. I regret nothing.
I feel like working there would be a way of admitting defeat. Like I'm just rolling over and letting corporate America suck my soul from me and sell it back for a profit.


well written and beautiful post. bleak though.


I don't have positive reasons to live. I only have negative reasons to live, that is reasons only to avoid things. The negative reasons are that I'd make my parents miserable if I offed myself, and that I'd possibly end up in hell or some similar shit place in the afterlife if there is an afterlife and a hell or similar. I don't pretend to know with confidence if there is or isn't an afterlife, but I've spent enough time on philosophy, religious studies, and afterlife research (such as it is) to know that the possibility hasn't been ruled out by any means.

Do you have any positive reasons to live? What are they? Any advice on how I can get some? Some background info that might be relevant is that I have a job that pays decently and is easy, so at that level my situation doesn't need much improvement, although I do worry about losing the job and becoming a poorfag almost daily; if I don't this job, I will not have even one thing going for me in my life, and I doubt I could ever get another even half as good.
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I mean you can only read a post about how we’re all Boltzmann brains on the third karmic wheel of satan’s soul torturing virtual reality so many times.


Wizzies leave because of Boltzmann brain posting?


Come on, don't go, we love you wiz. Everyone should be allowed to speak his mind freely right, as long as they don't break the rules?

No problem, have confidence in yourself, you can endure many things. Life is too short and full of hardships for us to get worked up about it.


The only reason I have to live is my dog. I won't kill myself and leave him to be neglected or abused by my parents. If they keep him at all.
He's too sweet to go through any of that shit.


May you find peace in afterlife wizard. I also feel death is getting close to me.

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All my life at least since I was like 8 different people would pick on me for no reason or betray or abandon me. I never bothered anybody yet people would be hostile or bully me out of nowhere. Friends would stop talking to me or become hostile to me without explanation, or wouls it be enough for somebody to say something bad to one of said friends to become hostile to me after years. This continued in high school. I managed to have a sort of group of friends but the same thing happened. There was for example a guy who I was ok with him and outta nowhere he refused to greet me and would look at me making smug faces and outright started bothering me at recess one day. Later years people would be extremely harsh with me for stuff they would pass or ignore on other people. For example there was a succubus (she was a neo nazi and very fucked up in the head) who I was sorta friend for a year yet she became hyper hostile against me for a small comment I once made to her. To the point of reacting aggressively and never talking to me again and doing bad comments against me every once. This continued even in college. I even tried to confront politely friends who suddenly for no reason stopped talking to me and all I got was evasives or staring at me like a soulless npc or even aggressions.

Same thing in the street, if there's a beggar or my country's version of the jogger he'll come to bother me outta all the possible people. There were weaker and weirder people at school yet none of those were picked, ever. And the only time I fought back I was called a violent monster by succubus classmate (I only slapped the bully on his face. He once stomped 3 times the head of another classmate, yet I'm the violent…)

I tried everything, from being nice, to being "myself", I've thought it was a punishment from god or karma and accepted it for a while (which fucked me up mentally even more). Yet to this day I don't even understand why people are like this with me

For the record I'm average and almost always used to dress normal, with nothing strange. Nowadays I'm mostly a silent character and dress "aggressively" (like a bodyguard, with sunglasses and everything) and carry pepper spray, and weapons just in case and even tough people avoid me more, I can notice when some people take that same approach, like they want to be hostile with me for no reason but since I don't give them any reason to do so by being as irrelevant as possible, they like sPost too long. Click here to view the full text.
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There's no need to comprehend something, but that you are just in dire to be ready for their parasitic crap which constantly will drip on you. Stop asking why and give an answer yourself to those deviants


Do any of you think this is some sort if karma?


This is depresding and scary at the same time. This thread is exactly what I experienced all my life. People will pick on me for no apparent reason even if I do nothing. It's like they have a radar. I'm horrified to this day to know what is the reason of this


That you still keep yourself asking why instead of constantly getting ready to backlash their multiple ways of manipulation.

this doesn't stop it, but you get to enjoy


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literally same

idk i will try to become mean and evil even tho i dont like it or i will just kill myself

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To start with, I hate everyone, and I hate everything excluding fictional characters and fictional settings.
I used to have ambitions of creating my own fictional worlds, and it's hard to shake them away. I still sometimes have urges to write down my ideas and quotes I think sound fun.
But I stop myself because there is no reason to transcribe it. For what purpose should I materially manifest my artistic visions? So that Twitter freaks who clap their hands at babies being born blind and deaf, and 4chan manchildren who play Nintendo may pervert my ideas? People are pure evil retardation. I would derive zero enjoyment by amassing fame and acclaim from the seething retarded masses, or from having even one individual read any of my works. Their perceptions of my characters and concepts would be insulting and revolting. And, being that the ideas are already there in my own head, they have served me well and do not require any physicality beyond this. I see them fine, and the seething retarded masses are sustained by lesbian cartoons and video games for toddlers; they have no need for my additions to the media ecosystem.

When you look to fiction, we see layered and emotive personalities. Characters are articulate, passionate, sensitive creatures who go places and do amazing things.
Here in reality, even those who have the money to do anything they desire often lead lives not dissimilar to niggers living in squalor. Look towards the British Royal Family, Donald Trump, Bobby Kotick, Bill Gates. See how they do nothing but have sex and stare at the wall like a fucking retard, despite their wealth.
Regardless of class, place or race, the seething retarded masses have neither romance nor adventure in their lives. No glorious deaths or trials. No justice. No heroes. Just copes and lies. Many successful family men here in reality die and they've lived such an uneventful down's syndrome life that their own family members have nothing substantial to say about them during their funerals.

Any hope for a career for me is dead on arrival. My only interest in the material world is animals, and any work involving animals is befitting of a Satan imp. It has been this way, and will stay this way for eternity. Watch as everyone around you laughs at animal suffering. Watch the normalfag as he laughs himself to tears over "jokes" of hamsters being smashed with hammers. Detailed, morbid tales of mishaps during the butchering process at the farm arePost too long. Click here to view the full text.
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You may as well develop your creativity and share it without falling into the pit of interacting with people. I respect artists who maintain distance from the rest of humanity, because it shows they actually care about their works more than gaining reputation/money.

In reality, things seem tragically unremarkable even for people of means; all they seem to do is use their wealth to obtain things that society values and meddle in politics/society for no good reason other than they can. Being a remarkable person is simple and takes little resources - pen and paper is as simple as it gets to share what is son your mind. The trick is to remove distractions from life so that you can commit to the pursuits of the mind.


The people who actually does cool things are a minority in every area, some politician might be funding niche projects somewhere in the world and we have no idea because is a secret.



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>some politician might be funding niche projects somewhere in the world
Respect the robot


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Same energy

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whats your days like? my days are starting to blend into nothingness so i wonder what everyone elses are like

>wake up random time

>contemplate why im still alive
>sit on computer for anywhere from 8-20 hours
>cycle between watching shows, youtube and browsing boards
>eat like shit all day at random times
>go to sleep randomly
>havent left the house since i moved here in march

what about you guys?
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how do you deal with pepople like thati cant get a job cuz i cant handle people


i do it terribly. its the worst part of the job and you can't escape it. i try to keep it to a minimum but sometimes you can't avoid it. i stumble my way through it somehow, lowkey i'm pretty sure everyone thinks i'm a retard.

my main problem is anxiety but then when that goes away with time, i still find it difficult to express myself in calls. i can type out some eloquent shit, but in the moment its really difficult to string together sentences. its a real bitch when someone needs me to explain something, i sort of feel like i'm throwing words at people and hope they get it. i think normal people have this sense of what's understood and then gradually build a shared understanding. i lack this habit because i'm so scared of what other people might be thinking of me that i try to blank them out. so on the outside it almost seems like i lack "theory of mind" and seem really autistic. but this is only when i'm under pressure. sometimes i freak out and think "am i even speaking english right now" until someone gives me feedback and i'm like "phew i think they understand me".


Notice how he adds the wiz prefix to everything.
This man is living in the wizworld, how envious I am!


brilliant strategy


It makes me feel less anxious to come home to relatively clean kitchen with only one or two dishes in the sink. Same with the litterbox.

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Do you think Nietzsche was right about this? I think there may be something to it. Normals are so fragile, especially succubi, they refuse to even consider bad scenarios and how horrible existence can be at times. It takes courage to contemplate negative thoughts and emotions. Pessimism is a sign of high vitality, of a brave spirit, of an ascetic soul who doesn't think feeling good all the time is necessarily desirable.
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Both pessemism and optimism lead themselves to the same sort of complacency

>Everything is hopeless, I'll do nothing

>Everything will be okay, I'll do nothing


Those most likely aren't even pessimists. Pessimism is still extremely rare and obscure compared to optimism. Whining about racism doesn't make someone pessimist.

Not in my case. Pessimism makes me active and want to do things. Things are bad so if I do nothing they will be even worse.

Pessimism can be fun, I don't deny it. It is interesting to blackpill others, especially normals and watch their reactions. Optimism only makes sense if you care about our species or if you are religious. In the first case because even if your life suck you will say that humanity matters more on the grand scale. In the latter case because you believe everything will end up just fine. I think if you are some variation of egoist then you are bound to end up as a pessimist. The optimist is ultimately a boring man, he is so content with life that he can't even entertain the thought of change, transformation and progress.


I have never even heard about these pills before reading this board, but I realize the "blackpill" beliefs have permeated my thinking ever since I was 5-6 years old.

I don't think life is inherently bad or good. It's just a bunch of chaotic things happening mostly because stronger people want it to happen, or it happens out of pure chance.

Nobody here is entitled to happiness. Most people's lives are 90-99% suffering and 1-10% glimpses of a tiny bit of happiness.

I'm optimistic about some things, like technological research advancing society to a level where flying cars, prolonging youth by 50 years etc. could be possible one day.

I'm pessimistic about other things; For example I realize 90%+ of the planet will never reach a good standard of living.
There will never be enough resources, food and water for everyone on the planet to live a good life.

I also realize many things in life are out of our control: Where we are born, what we look like, how tall we are, what our family background is etc., it's just a roll of the dice.
If you get unlucky at birth… Well, there is no cure, you are just fucked.


>I also realize many things in life are out of our control: Where we are born, what we look like, how tall we are, what our family background is etc., it's just a roll of the dice.
>If you get unlucky at birth… Well, there is no cure, you are just fucked.

That's a blackpill very few normies will accept.

I was literally born with nerve damage making it impossible for me to walk or even move my arms for anything else than a mouse and keyboard (even typing hurts sometimes).

Yet they have the audacity to tell me 'life is what you make out of it'.
No dipshit, I didn't choose to be born this way. Life isn't what I made out of it, I just had shitty luck.


I think life is inherently bad but what can you do? You just shrug and go on as long as you can do some things that bring you happiness.

I'm an optimist too about technology. I think it will bring us to new and new heights of culture and could also lead us to experience mystic and occultic stuff, like through VR.

> I realize 90%+ of the planet will never reach a good standard of living.

There will never be enough resources, food and water for everyone on the planet to live a good life.
There is enough resources but most of it is held by the few richest of the rich. Do you know how many food gets thrown out in Western countries? Half of Africa could be fed from what we send to the dumpsters. There is enough water too but like I said, it is needed for the pool party orgies of wealthy men. Such is capitalism where the ultra needs of the few privileged overrule the basic needs of the many.

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