/dep/ - Depression

>>311127
>Regards, a person who composured his way from a conversation with some liquor-scented old succubus tonight.

You didn't need to "composure" your way out of that conversation. You could have just told her she reeks like alcohol and that you don't want to converse with her. You're an adult, after all.

>>310999
I've experienced the same frustration, if you don't like me why don't you just fuck off?
Only breaking off contact and living alone helped.

>>310999
they're banking on you letting your guard down and gathering compromising info to leverage against you at a later point

>>310999
People do that for the same reason a phycho doesn't murder someone in broad daylight with a bunch of witnesses. Unless they're a masochist and like getting caught, or wish to forward some kind of inhumane purview.

People have a public image. They like to keep it consistent under the light of scrutiny, then unveil their true colors under the cover of darkness.

I'm sorry this has happened to you so consitently. Sometimes people suck. But remember that if they are shoving all this hate onto you and acting all hypocritical, they probably feel insecure about themselves. Don't take them too seriously. Rather, fee bad for them that they would willingly choose to act like a spoiled elementary school bully.

>>310999
That reminds me of normgroid scum who were shittalking me constantly but sometimes pretended to be bros with me for the sake of wicked fun. It's a perverse technique they use, this sudden fake niceness. If you believe them, they mock and humiliate you. If you don't believe them, they will use your negative reaction as a reason to mock you as well, something like "I was being nice to you, you piece of shit, how dare you'.
There is no winning with the normalcattle.

>>310564
blah blah making universal rules again.

>>310564
>and it is wrong because….because it could hurt mommy and daddy!
there is no rational reason to consider suicide wrong, it is a legitimate choice for anyone who desires to become unconscious

>>310316
>I forget the name, but there's a pretty popular public forum where they give you detailed instructions how to die and everything
maybe you mean sanctioned suicide? i liked reading posts there and here at one point

Please dont kill yourself. Suicide is wrong because it makes me sad to see a wizard die :'(

But seriously, I like wizchan for suicide tolerance too. Sanctioned Suicide is absolutely overrun by mentally ill vegan foids and its so corny.

yeah I don't get it I got banned from a site for simply discussing suicide
overmoderation is real

No, they make me feel even more cynical and make me feel even worse.

>>308739
I equate payphones to save points or storage locations in video games. I never needed to use one but I always imagined I'd use one when I was a grown up whilst wearing a big coat and smoking a cigar/cigarette.

What do you even expect from them? If I had to bet I think those people just project people around them who have committed suicide before into you, when they talk about how you are going to make others sad, they probably are thinking about how they themselves felt before. There isn't anything someone who don't know anything about you can give you an advice that can actually make you feel better in the long term.
>>308706
Wow.

>>308694
No they are not.
I called one after cutting myself. Not seriously enough to die, but I bleed a lot. The indifferent normalfag on the other side of the phone talked down to me as if I was a child, lectured me, said I should go to the psychiatrist and get pills, they will help. Yeeeeeeeah
I will never call one again, ever.
It was humiliating. Normalfags are horrible.

>>311226
That's kind of like how I feel about being a serious-minded businessman sitting in public transportation reading the daily newspaper of record for the finance section

>>311225
>I suppose buying an older car and using the fumes to go to sleep would be the next best alternative?
No. There is no next best alternative because when it comes to these convoluted Rube Goldberg X Dr. Suess methods of death, there is nothing good about them in the first place. They're all equally fucking retarded.

The car exhaust "method" is particularly absurd because its entire spread came from honest concerns about manifold leaks entering the car's air recycler causing disorientation which could lead to loss of control over the vehicle. The notion of it being reliably deadly came from the assumption that the person in the car was driving it at 80Mph. Yes, concentrated O2 emissions are deadly but the means to obtain a reliably lethal outcome that doesn't involve accidentally careening off an icy overpass are so out of reach and not without dozens of points of failure. If someone is "suicidal", and their plan involves:
>purchasing an older used car
>Removing the catalytic converter
>fueling it up
>running tubes from the {now chopped up) tailpipe to the cabin
>sealing all air leaks, involving the entire AC system that recycles air from the cab no matter what
>idling for hours
>in sweltering heat and total sensory irritation
>to pass out in a way that would (again) cause spazms, torment reflexes, and a huge potential for vegetation if interrupted.
Then they're just not fucking suicidal. They're merely incredibly stupid. So stupid that they were just as easily convinced that suicide was the answer they sought, as they were convinced that the "easiest" method was so plainly complicated.

>>311208
this doesn't work like this retard, you pick your method and then do it once and then it's over forever
if he can't succesfully control the gas his attempt will fail
people have been using ropes to end themselves since antiquity

>>311231
>this doesn't work like this retard, you pick your method and then do it once and then it's over forever
Then go do it once.
>if he can't succesfully control the gas
(He won't successfully control the gas)
>his attempt will fail
And then he will be labelled a threat to himself and placed under occasional surveillance, being stripped of much of his freedom of travel. If in this failing experience he develops a newfound fear of death, he'll forever live life with that fear, now with a brain and body even less capable of enduring such powerful emotions. Highly likely to fail, and that failure will surely make a second attempt even harder, and the rest of his life worse than it was when he decided to end it the first time.
>people have been using ropes to end themselves since antiquity
Carry the torch.

If youre asking instead of looking it up yourself. Youre fake and gay and probably a normalnigger in disguise, dramatizing suicide because faggotry

>>311228
>Rube Goldberg
You know I actually agree with this except the method I most researched, and almost got close to building, was sorta this. My plan was a lightly weighted swinguing guillotine or blade, hanging from a timer-relay lock above you, below is a bed or fram with a plastic head basket like the things hairdressers use, and straps to hold the neck and body in place. The idea was to get shitfaced with alcohol and benzos before it. But yeah I guess the biggest problem was reliably holding yourself down so as to not make that shit cut your face in half, or your chest, and making sure the dose was enough to knock you out. I think the nervousness and restless of preparing and approaching your final seconds of life, the adrenaline could overpower some seddatives. I live in no-gunz cucked country, if I had access to a shotgun thatd be my preferred method.

Something I never got about the car exhaust method is if people ever thought about how little, literally sipping, fuel an idling engine consumes. And I cannot think of an easy way to load an engine in an enclosed space, dynos are hella costly

>>311232
why are you even here

idk about ya'll but I just started taking St John's-wort, first time trying to treat the depressive episodes with something other than alcohol and nic

>>311045
This nigga be taking ashwagandha and lion's mane next lol

>>311047
Lion's mane made me feel better, as if my brain was getting a tiny bit more power. Amanita gave me terrors beyond any description. Horrible shroom

being overweight has ruined my life

>>311191
i lost weight and my life still sucks. why did it ruin your life?

in truth practically every single person who attempts and fails regrets having ever done it. Life can get better wizzies, the more you spend looking into that dark mirror the worse things will seem to you

>>310295
>Life can get better wizzies

I hope so wiz.

>>310295
any advice you'd be willing to offer?

>>308555
Nearly all snacks taste different now. Chocolate bars taste off; sodas don't taste quite right; even old brands of potato chips taste different.

>>303919
maybe his depression would ease up if he realized he was under water in a created environment?

>>311106
My "plan" around your age was to get a part-time job or something to reintroduce myself into society and "sort myself out". I had such a shit time in college when I was 18/19/20 (basically just walked around like a ghost, went to lessons and never spoke to anyone) that I decided not to jump back into education until I was a real boy who was happy with himself and ready to be a social busybody who might actually be accepted by people, otherwise it's gonna be another hellscape alienation ghostmode simulator.

I didn't do it in the end. I'm 29 now and have a part-time job but have no idea what I'd study and think I'll be too old soon. I've heard normalfags say going back to school really "upped their social game" (*pukes*) but then they're normalfags so of course it would.

In any case I would start low-level, maybe volunteer somewhere, find somewhere you're accepted and treated like an actual human by people, and you'll start feeling better, and can work from there and maybe pursue further education. It's not easy, I have no advice, I went on some course and they gave me a job, pure luck. But they treat me well and my hypothesis that social isolation completely ruined my life in my teens was validated. I have moments of belonging which make me want to pursue things because being treated well and held in mind by people lifts the depression blinders enough to consider doing things, at least temporarily, sometimes.

Unfortunately I think the damage is done for me because I was isolated so long, but I can see how getting a good social start in adolescence is a major key to living a "proper" life and achieving things. Without that base, whether that's friends, family, whatever, I think it's very hard for a person to motivate themselves to do anything, because there's no people so no context and no future. Maybe not if you're a sigma lonewolf schizoid elite sas operative battlewiz impervious to social needs like a sim with a defunct social bar, but that's probably not you, as much as we'd all like it to be.

I think I was fucked over by my narcism learned in school together with that I shouldnt try too hard and just study last day because it always worked. I uni I fucked myself over once I noticed I was good enough in first semester and then stopped trying hard because things will work out somehow. The narcism is like a brainbug together with my laziness and slop addiction made it impossible to spend my time well, plan ahead or giving a fuck. And when I noticed things arent going well I just became more miserable, constantly comparing myself to others and trying to nitpick how I am better to find a reason why I shouldnt work harder. And I cant force myself to work I cant convince my subconciousness that I should or else Ill just search for distractions.
Im 24yo still in uni now and hope I can somehow find a job and fix my grades.

>>311165
I think you hate learning things you dont care about

>>311182
We are rooting for you friend.

>>311183
forced to learn things you don't like

>>309776

labels dont help, they hinder. they are used by people to dismiss the problem and abandon responsibility, which likely is the only path to healing. you don't have depression, you have something way more specific, personal and complicated. when you call it depression, you let yourself be seduced by the diagnostic language; it's often hollow promises and the undignified preemptive certainty they hide behind. i say do the oposite: describe your condition as crude, unhinged, precise and accessible to others as you can. your name about your condition should be so easy to understand that when you tell it to someone who has no idea about it, understands it the first time you mention it without having to ask fir details.

"i thought i had to fart the other day but i actually shat my pants with liquid shit a little" now that's how i talk about my most recenr condition, without shame! not using this ridiculous gatekept medical language.

>>309783
so i have a very specific, personal kind or depression, that is actually a bit comorbid with my overall inclination to being anxious?

>>309788
>so i have a very specific, personal kind or depression, that is actually a bit comorbid with my overall inclination to being anxious?

i can never know what you have because i can't feel what you feel so what could my opinion possibly be worth. nothing. i can look at your approach though. when you tell me with your chest sticking out all proud and identified: "i have depression!" then i don't know how that feels like, that tells me nothing. the term is like a shotgun and hits everything, you want something that only hits what you actually have precisely. you know the term is too much of a blanket term to be useful by the fact that you would receive 100 different answers if you asked 100 depressed people about their condition and not the same answer 100 times.

calling it comorbid and anxiety is at least a step in the right direction but you are once again committing what i in my pieced-together understanding of mental health believe to be a mistake: you just repeat medical labels as if they meant anything. what i believe to be way better would be to invent/sculpt/compose/craft/sketch a way to describe what is actually going on so that when a kid in the park asks you what is wrong with you, you could tell it in a way that makes sense to the kid and then the kid in the park might have a way better idea on what to do about it then any doctor ever because the kid did not have it's humanity pranked, whipped and tortured out of it in medschool.

most importantly though, bothering to be precise about it will give you better ideas on what to try to make things better and the most healing the most helping will be what you do to yourself, not what will be done onto you by others. don't wait to be rescued, nobody is coming, you do the rescuing.

>>309791
You are amazing in a way, but you sound like you may (or might) have paranoia

just stop thinking about 'other people'

Why would you do that to yourself? I don't relate to those kinds of protagonists at all. At best, it's nice to see characters who were truly meant to be together end up together.

Name of the dating sim?

>>310683
EVA ayanami raising proj w/asuka. specifically getting to marriage ending. I got a lot of cute romantic events on the way there..

>>310681
i find it easy to immerse myself

>At best, it's nice to see characters who were truly meant to be together end up together

Hate to sound like a crab but i'm sick of that. People in general sicken me so seeing them happy makes me feel like i'm not understanding something that I should. At least I dont spoil the mood with my presence or unwanted opinions but that's 3DPD

>>310684
Dear journal I have abandonned,


today, I have been struck with a reminder one's life is not much different from programming a software package. and my parents are anything but programmers

there's a gaming board

>>309028
there is no desire. society judges your complaints as either valid or not. you are not a victim if you're a wizard. you are a victim if you're brown or female. that's all.

>>309028
it's a self-defense mechanism. by self-victimize yourself, you're telling someone you are weak and not worth being the targets of bad things they want to do to you. it also comes from fear

>>309015
It's "honest" (in brackets).
You can say to someone who doesn't mean to bully you it hurts already hoping civilized people to back off before some kind of a treatening to sue over moral damages arises. Soyboys are especially good at that.

Unfortunately, it does not *deter* bullies. If you are some kind of manipulator who collects evidence for possible lawsuits, you're golden, and so is your lawyer. If you're honestly asking to leave you alone with this victimization of yourself, you're in the wrong… spot.

>>309030
>>309029
self-victimisation is nonsense

>>309026
>everything from the TV to the tiktoks are signaling that you should do it
EFFING SWITCH CHANNELS!!!

And I mean it.
Delete your old accounts. Start some new accounts. Subscribe to channels that either teach you stuff, OR AT LEAST cover some tricks done by humans (say, ElectroBoom).


Subscribe to Vimeo as it seems to not throw "THE [media persona] IS FINISHED! 2026!" stuff into your "you may also like" feed.

Or rather, fight tech with tech: ask LLM AI what kind of video you should watch today.