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File: 1722630765172.gif (193.75 KB, 128x128, 1:1, 1720558520337.gif) ImgOps iqdb

 No.293806[Reply]

How old are you? What brought you to where you are? What prevents you from changing?
57 posts and 4 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.296128

>>293806
>How old are you?
29

>What brought you to where you are?

Some degree of autism probably. I first realised that I'm "different" around the age of 4 or 5. Other kids seemed to be able to intuitively socialise with others, but I was and still am really confused about social interactions. I just don't know what to say, nothing comes to my mind during conversations. So I became a social outcast.
Also apathy, this post >>295481 is an excellent description of it. I also learnt to read very early in my life, and have been escaping into fantasy since then. Maybe I dreamed too big and had unrealistic expectations about life, maybe a child is not supposed to absorb so much fiction at an age where everything has such a big influence on your development.

>What prevents you from changing?

I guess the belief that real life sucks. Working 12 hours a day, if you include the self-improvement like working out and grinding competences, just to have a little pleasure maybe once a week seems like a really bad deal. I'd rather get by doing the necessary minimum and resting the rest of the time.

 No.296157

>>296127
Paranoid about whether they are in the same boat. People say you could not speak to autists for years and they would be in the same boat, but schizoids, I don't know.

 No.296162

>>296157
what do you mean by being in the same boat?

 No.296172

>how old are you?
31
>What brought you to where you are?
A combination of being born in a world where no one understood autism, constant heartbreak, dejection by peers and in some cases parents.
>What prevents you from changing?
The fear of being hurt…again.

 No.296176

>>296162
The ability to remain within the same contexts in which you related to them last time. Schizoids are unrelatable daydreamers / mystics. Compare Kaczynski vs. Chris Chan, a lolcow. The majority of them are married, there is also a huge demographic of low iq people incapable of understanding the misery of having a low-wage job + a family + children so that they can feel it. He may devolve into a normie



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 No.296143[Reply]

what does he want from us?
why is he torturing us?
why does he give great amount of suffering and horror to poor believers while giving happiness and wealth to evil disbelieving people?
why is he so careless?
7 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.296160

>>296155
No, he must have known that our nature is determined to be corrupted. He only did it to have fun watching us kill ourselves.

 No.296161

>>296159
>Obese effeminate neckbeard DEBOONKS religion
An ancient art

 No.296164

>>296160
Literally Satan's way of thinking.

 No.296166

>>296161
Theism/Atheism debates are midwit slop.

 No.296184

>>296143
You got your answers:
>>296146
>>296147

Now, maybe worry about something that actually does exist. Like life, for example, and everyday life.



 No.296151[Reply]

I should have been more mean and agressive as a kid/teen. I regret not being rebelious enough, not doing enough bad shit growing up. Not talking about awful shit like killing people or shooting up school but just being more rude to everyone, fighting back more often than I did, throwing tantrums, etc. When you're a minor you got inmunity under the law to do whatever crazy shit you want as long as you don't kill anyone. I lament I never used that power to create more chaos around me. I regret not using my inmunity to cause pain and suffering on my peers. I wish I had more balls so I could have showed teeth earlier, done more mean shit I don't know. I fucking hate people and as an adult you can't throw a tantrum like that. I should have been a problematic kid instead, maybe I would have grow some balls I don't know.

 No.296153

>>296151
yeah i feel like its too late to learn some things at my age too, i should have been more daring

 No.296154

why tho? you think you'd be more attractive to succubi or get more respect from other meatheads?

 No.296158

>>296151
Do you perceive bitching and tantrums as masculine? If you aren't the bully, you might end up a more cringy loser and feel shame instead



 No.296071[Reply]

It seems like learning English was one of the worst mistakes of my life, I am someone who live in India and doesn't plan to leave the country. Any idea how I can cope with racism online?

It's very hard to be online, my self-esteem and self-confidence has been wrecked primarily because of internet. I will admit as a kid, I really wanted to see the west, playing video games like NFS, GTA, and, watching Hollywood movies late in the night, were some of the fondest memories of mine as a child.

But as an adult I think immigrating would be a very bad idea, because I would probably be homeless in a few days because I don't know how the system works. Forget about all that, I am too poor to immigrate. So that is out of the question.

A lot of times, I just want to use internet in peace and make friends with people over online websites. But as soon as they find out I am Indian they start hurling abuses. It's terrible.

Honestly a lot of it has destroyed my self-esteem and self-confidence and I don't know how to regain it even when knowing that for the most of my life I am rarely ever going to encounter a white person.

And then there is the whole blackpill thing as well, because we Indians aren't attractive (speaking for myself mostly but still) most of Indian succubi in the West tend to date white just like East Asian succubi. So that's like another insult to injury to be honest.

Overall it kinda sucked to realise that I am so hated and life in the West if I could immigrate that is, would probably suck for me greatly. Like all the parties and fun that I saw in Hollywood movies are only reserved for succubi and few attractive men. In real life in the West I would be bullied mercilessly.

On the other hand, something good has come out of it as well, which is, I have stopped resenting India a bit because I have realised that at least I don't face racism here in real life and won't be bullied here too much. In the end, I guess it is for the best that I couldn't immigrate I imagine.

Anyways, now that I have learned English Any suggestions on how to not feel bad about myself while being exposed to extreme and never ending racism online? It really has given a hit to my self-esteem.
4 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.296086

>>296071
Correct me if I am wrong, but I was under the impression that indians were actually white in a long distant past only to racemix. Now they are no less racist among themselfs based on how far from the original white ancestry they are and whnever they emigrate in big enough numbers they bring this with them.

 No.296087

>>296071
I honestly wonder what it's like to feel bad about racism. I'm hispanic but I've never seen a "racist" comment I was legitimately offended by. Usually it's a comment clearly made from a position of insecurity, like a powerless crab saying something.
All the non-degenerate white people I've met were always raging liberals who bent over backwards to be nice to me.

 No.296111

>>296087
Well, you've gotta admit, it's hard to be an Indian, I doubt Hispanics even receive a fraction of racism that Indians do.
>>296086
Well majority of Indians are brown so that eliminated institutional racism, but yes fair skinned Indians do look down a lot upon other Indians. Nothing could be done with regards to that.

People don't like it when I say this here (because few whites here won't geomaxx, which I respect) but looks are objective, attractivity of races is largely objective, most of the good looking Indian succubi and white passing Indian succubi in the West tend to date white men. In all races of men, white men have it the easiest. There is some truth to white privilege.

Although I would argue things are more brutal for East Asians, their succubi hate them, and I think at this point in life, I hope we can all agree that they don't hate their men because of "culture", "patriarchy", or "traditional gender roles" but because of their skin colour and looks.

Being told you're inferior again and again, also accepting that at a subconscious level, and constantly being made fun of and wished that one was dead does take a toll on the mental health on someone.

And that is THE question, how to undo damage done to self-esteem and self-confidence due to this?

 No.296112

Just say you’re from Mexico or Argentina they are identical to Indians in looks

 No.296114


>>296077
>rarely do people have mixed children.
wishful thinking



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 No.294757[Reply]

Working in dementia wards and retirement homes, I've come to wonder if an increased life expectancy is not necessarily a good thing and we're just prolonging human suffering.

It seems like for most of history, if you had something wrong with you, you were quickly filtered off and didn't suffer too long. The congenitally sickly and disabled typically died early on as children, and if you got unwell in your 40s, 50s or 60s you typically died. Even things like Schizophrenia had a much shorter suffering period as you inevitably hurt yourself and got an infection, now schizos are kept alive until they die in their 50s or 60s.

Could it be that modern society has it wrong and having a leaner, meaner filter keeps the population fit and healthy? It seems like the burden of wah wah existentialism comes from living too long as well, as the whole literary movement is correlated with life expectancy starting to rise in Europe.

 No.294758

File: 1725512954031.jpg (253.71 KB, 1024x984, 128:123, society-adachi-true.jpg) ImgOps iqdb

I have thought about that before. I'd say you're right.

 No.294773

Solution: Give every citizen at the age of XX (2X) a free pill in a neutral envelope. Don't wait for a proposal, just send it to everyone generally. It's up to them whether to take it or not. This would solve all our problems.

 No.294776

File: 1725598641366.png (1.65 MB, 1750x1326, 875:663, ClipboardImage.png) ImgOps iqdb

I also work in a similar environment. It makes me depressed to see all these old people who never get visitors and spend their days in chronic pain and misery, occasionally sitting in their own shit and kept alive because they have an advance directive that says to keep them alive written by their kids who have power of attorney and made it happen but also never visit or give a shit about them.
Kinda makes me wish we had pic related or something.

 No.296094

Read Brave New World, i think they had pills there that made you perfectly healthy until you're 60 and then you died immediately
Is this what you want? I think withering away is natural, nothing wrong with that, because you're supposed to trade your youth, health, potential for experience and wisdom and wealth and connections and descendants. If you do that, then as you become old and senile and useless, you've got all that stuff you've accumulated, and people who love you and will never abandon you

Now, lots of boomers traded their life's potential for hedonisic spending and pure monetary gain, and now they eat dirt. Good riddance.



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 No.294867[Reply]

I have no hobbies or activities I like. Also currently a neet, I spend all my time in bed. What are some things i can do that will stop the rot
16 posts and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.295672

>>295663
why would I read books about a jew?

 No.295674

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>>295660
(hobbies)things that involves only yourself (or hobbies like online gaming)

 No.295700

>>294867
you know why and are likely suppressing the information from yourself because it is uncomfortable. abandon fear, listen to your heart. your heart and gut says stay in bed and rot because you are distressed about something and saddened. if you diagnose what is actually saddening you and not blame yourself for your natural reaction then you will be able to remove it, over time. just keep self diagnosing and analyzing every night, follow what your intuition says to do even if it says something like "be a hobo" or "lie in bed all day". that is what you want to do for a reason and you should follow it. follow the reason why you lie in bed and resolve it since you clearly no longer want to lie in bed. ignoring your own heartgut will rob your soul

 No.295762

>>294878
>that will at least get you out of the house to get some fresh air, get the blood flowing
There is literally no benefit to this whatsoever. I've tried it a bunch of times. It only makes me more tired and miserable.

 No.296093

this is textbook depression so normal answers may not work for you, especially if your brain is malfunctioning and you wont get the natural dopamine rush from exercise, acomplishing your goals atc
what helps me is gardening, because its an activity that feels nice WHILE i am doing it, regardless of the effect. The activity in itself must be rewarding. Instant gratification.



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 No.295602[Reply]

How badly will escitalopram fuck my libido? Is it permanent? They're also 9 months expired is it still safe to take? Will it lower my heart rate?

 No.295603

Any kind of "opram" will turn you in to a lobotomized succubus. Shove your antidepressants up a doctor's ass

 No.295604

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>>295603
You're right. Drugs only mask the cause of anxiety and sadness, not address the source.

 No.295655

SSRIs are placebo.
They do have real side effects, though, so, be careful.

 No.295892

>>295655
Yeah you're right the trade off seems worse I'm already depressed having my dick not work and being numb seems like shit

 No.296089

Escytalopram is every baby's first depression med
They give it to everyone specifically because its quite soft and easy to drop
But yes, libido will drop, for me it went from masturbating every day to once every 3 days and with a less stiff erection

But drugs are for desperate people. you should take them when your problems are of such magnitude, it doesn't matter if you'll be able to masturbate.
I think that's the issue with psychiatry. Imagine they gave chemotherapy to randos. Of course people would get burned and complain. Only do it when your life is at risk/in freefall



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 No.296057[Reply]

i have strange urges when i watch lights flicker on the screen. they do it so smoothly and nicely. i feel like i want to flicker with them but i can't. what the fuck, jesus christ

 No.296058

You were a firefly in a past life

 No.296073

you should stop abusing substances



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 No.289727[Reply][Last 50 Posts]

getting angry, getting frustrated edition

previous >>285492
310 posts and 38 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.296055

I really can't motivate myself to do work. I'm just procrastinating so hard it's ridiculous. God I hate this useless shit. Modern labour is beyond ridiculous. I see how our country is going broke. It's because of useless tasks that help nobody that waste time that make everything inhuman.

 No.296060

>>296054
I'm in the same situation. I can't get NEETbux but really can't deal with working jobs on physical locations anymore. And moving out of my shitty parents' home means I always have the fear of homelessness looming over my head. Moving back into their place is not an option either since they refuse to let me either NEET or work from home so I'd be stuck slaving in a warehouse again for their pleasure.

 No.296061

>>295352
My job is like this too except for the customers never being mad at me part. I usually feel very pressured to do things as quickly as possible. From 08:30 to 09:00, we don't even have supervisors to talk to for some reason so if a customer calls in a that time, they're pretty much just screwed.

I've had some conversations where people didn't realise I hadn't hung up yet and I could hear them make fun of my monotonous way of speaking. One time had a guy tell me I sounded like I'm dead inside.

 No.296169

>>296039
It happens every single goddamn shift when I work. Unfortunately I work at a convenience store/truck stop during the night hours and it sucks major donkey dick. Like fuck these people in particular and their complete idiocy and retardation…

 No.296180

File: 1731953025305.jpg (196.05 KB, 1349x1349, 1:1, 1728554385948065.jpg) ImgOps iqdb

Later this week I have an interview for a job as an "Online Shopping Assistant" at a supermarket. The hours are 4AM-8AM i.e before the shop actually opens so I shouldn't have to interact with the public. Basically I would just go around putting items into plastic baskets for online orders and then place the baskets into a van for the driver to deliver later that day.

It's 16 hours a week, part time, so I would only be making like ~£830 a month however my rent is quite low so this would actually cover rent, food, gas & electric bill. If I actually get 16 hours every week then my monthly outgoings would be like £50. This could see me surviving for perhaps a few years as I have a couple thousand quid saved from my last job so I can tank £50/month living costs for a while.

Obviously getting up at 4AM will put most people off but I reckon I could do it; I go to bed fairly early most nights anyway to escape the misery of waking life. I like the idea of being finished my shift at 8AM, thus basically having the entire normal day 'free'.

I hope I get the job. The application didn't even ask for a CV. Surely there cannot be many people who would take these shift times and only 16 hours a week. Wish me luck brehs.


[Last 50 Posts]

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 No.295957[Reply]

At what point is it objectively justifiable to give up? I'm 21 (nearly 22) and I've only worked dead end jobs and never even come close to being in a relationship with anyone. I tried, but there's just been so many negative experiences in my life (mostly from other people) that led me to being a shut in schizoid. I alternate between shaking with rage at my predicament and being completely numb. It's weird, I used to be such a happy kid with a bright future and now I'm just a future suicide case wading through life as if I'm on borrowed time. Anyone else feel like a animal trapped in a cage? I literally only passively exist like a fucking hamster; if I died right now, I'd be forgotten in 6 months max.
18 posts and 2 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.295993

killing yourself is one thing, but you have to actually do it not just think about it because if you don't do it then you are stuck having to survive just like anyone else and the less effort you put in the worse off you will be. This is just simple facts of life. Live or die choose one and if you choose life, then choose your flavor of suffering. Each choice you make unlocks new levels of suffering, including not making any choices at all, which in itself is a choice.

 No.296000

>>295993
You're assuming free will. Whose to say you can make choices at all. It seems more plausible that it's all deterministic and man has no say in what's going to happen. We just experience the consequences. How else would you explain shit going on in the world today.

 No.296013

>>295977
So you are literally doing the opposite of what was said there by giving in to the wizard life instead of trying at being a "le normalfag". I can guess where ur coming from, that you have little bracrabls and ram to spare thanks to your lifestyle.

 No.296025

Anyone under 30 should not give up in my opinion, even though I ended up like this at 30+. You might think you're unfixable but still be a secret late-stage late bloomer.

 No.296037

>>296013
And how do you know exactly what I have or haven't done (or tried) since saving that image? I barely come here anymore because I'm sick of imageboards and the hostile little twerps like you that use them. Get rekt by the word filter, bitch.



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