No.302257[Reply]
Isolation has carved me in its image and likeness. The presence of another person- of any person whatsoever - instantly slows down my thinking, and while for a normal man contact with others is a stimulus to spoken expression and wit, for me it is a counterstimulus, if this compound word be linguistically permissible. When all by myself, I can think of all kinds of clever remarks, quick comebacks to what no one said, and flashes of witty sociability with nobody. But all of this vanishes when I face someone in the flesh: I lose my intelligence, I can no longer speak, and after half an hour I just feel tired. Yes, talking to people makes me feel like sleeping. Only my ghostly and imaginary friends, only the conversations I have in my dreams, are genuinely real and substantial, and in them intelligence gleams like an image in a mirror.
The mere thought of having to enter into contact with someone else makes me nervous. A simple invitation to have dinner with a friend produces an anguish in me that's hard to define. The idea of any social obligation whatsoever attending a funeral, dealing with someone about an office matter, going to the station to wait for someone I know or don't know - the very idea disturbs my thoughts for an entire day, and sometimes I even start worrying the night before, so that I sleep badly. When it takes place, the dreaded encounter is utterly insignific ant, justifying none of my anxiety, but the next time is no different: I never learn to learn.
'My habits are of solitude, not of men.' I don't know if it was Rousseau or Senancour who said this. But it was some mind of my species, it being perhaps too much to say of my race.”
Text 49, The Book of Disquiet by Fernando Pessoa
5 posts and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view. No.303062
>>302257the person who suffers most in this world is the person who has many wrong perceptions, and most of our perceptions are erroneous.
Then meditate on your perceptions, write this in a piece of paper "are you sure?" tape it in a wall And now practice deeply and observe your mental formations, the ideas and tendencies withing you that lead to speak and act as you do. Practice and at the end you find your true nature and how you're influenced by your individual consciusness, media, propaganda, collective consciousness, family, society, ancestors, bad experiences, traumas, etc. All are unwholesome mental formations made up by bad, confused and suffering people.
No.303068
>>303051>>303062Thank you coach, for all the utilitarian bullshit. Now gtfo.
No.303090
>>303068>Thank you coach, for all the utilitarian bullshit.To be honest, I believe in the idea that potential shamans were actually schizos who, between the ages of 12 and 23, entered into a neuropsychological crisis and needed to learn mystical-magical techniques to endure their chaotic and miserable existence of bad feelings and emotions of fucked up neurochemistry.
The truth is, I think meditation and relaxation fixed my brain a little, and I don't use drugs.
Although I also read some scientific articles that said meditation can make people with mental disorders worse, I don't do it so intensely to a point of dissociation. The worst thing is that it even happens to normal people without problems lol.
>Now gtfo.no problem anon.
No.303769
You have a pretty well elaborated written discourse, so your smartness is ok.
Maybe you should listen your body and stop letting others decide where you must go and when.
No.303789
>>303068Oh no no, we won't until you do something utlitarian yourself. For instance, 0.1% concentration CO2 in your room is enough to give some a headache (the natural concentration is 0.04%).