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File: 1773968676003.jpeg (26.63 KB, 450x379, 450:379, IMG_4994.jpeg) ImgOps iqdb

 No.306437[Reply]

Does anyone else voluntarily exile themselves from society?

I'm tired of socializing, drama, human interests, social demands, social everything.

I wish I was a machine instead of a talking ape. I actually hate being an animal.
I don't even hate people, I just don't want to be in any contact with them. I even hate my own body for forcing me to eat and wash in order to not completely dysfunction.
26 posts and 2 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.307190

>I even hate my own body for forcing me to eat and wash in order to not completely dysfunction.
This is why you can't protect your solitude.

One can only achieve exile if one can make themselves ugly and stinky. This is why monks shave their heads and wear rags. As long as you care about your appearance and hygiene someone will always care.

If you want to be a hermit even within society, just stop showering and people will leave you alone.

 No.307380

I'm doing this now. It's for the best. I quite literally have about 100 family members that I used to be in somewhat contact with, but now i shut off as much as possible. 30+ cousins I just dont respond to, of course all the unc/aunties too. I can't handle the stress and judgement and intrusions they force into my life. I can't stand my grandma and older relatives repeating the same questions and stories over and over non stop. Im beetter off online working the least amount of hours possible. Ideally I'll have an apartment of my own soon. The worst part is when these people try to find me at work… very annoying

 No.307383

>>307190
>One can only achieve exile if one can make themselves ugly and stinky.

you'd think this is a valid approach, i did try this.

when i was molested hard by females i stopped brushing my teeth, believing it would make my breath smell so horrible that the succubi leave me alone. this did not really work, i was still swarmed.

dressing as plain as i could, wearing sunglasses everywhere and hiding my long hair did help somewhat but what unfortunately draws the female attention is joy of life, health, connection with source, optimism, lack of corruption. so the only way is to act to be sickly, weak and depressed. basically you can't be happy even though it is easily possible for a human because if you are, females will block your path rugby-style and violently force you to give them attention. they are the worst rapists, they have no concept of consent whatsoever for other people; only for themselves.

 No.307593

File: 1778035642328.jpg (313.8 KB, 612x541, 612:541, bookscancenter_23.jpg) ImgOps iqdb

Yes I semi-voluntarily cut ties off from society.

In fact, I made it a point to create an almost complete blackout of year 2000 culture and later.

I surrounded myself with pre-1990s, culture only, only listening to obscure Italo-Disco or Japanese music from the 80s.

I stopped listening to radio, stopped watching TV, stopped going to movies.

My only contact with modern culture is what I inadvertantly see when I go outside, indie games and synthwave/juchewave. But synthwave/juchewave is idiosyncratic enough to keep me well-insulated from prevailing culture, so I consider it safe.

If I am at my mother's house, I will leave the room if she starts watching TV. If she mutes the TV, I'll try to look away from the screen.

I block advertising on youtube not merely for the annoyance of advertising but also because it is contemporary cultural rot.

With the exception of my mother, I stopped talking to my family about 20 years ago. I do not have any friends or contacts online.

I do not work. Haven't worked for decades. I have no social circle IRL.

I have the same backpack, clothes from 20 years ago. I wear a cheap casio watch. No cellphone/smartphone.

Post too long. Click here to view the full text.

 No.307594

>>307383
BTFO them. Don't interact with them. Exclude them. Ignore them.



 No.306088[Reply]

I'm Failed Low Tier Normie (3.5 PSL Rating), utterly autistic, haven't had friends for a decade by now (I'm just 20), can't function in any way (work-related, socially or even just within my family; I'm even too scared to talk to my biological dad or e.g my grandmother when she comes here) and every day I feel more and more angry that I have to bear this existence every second I'm alive. I can't even simply laugh at things, I'm just a manchild chud who can't be entertained and who doesn't have motivation to do anything. It's like I've been already dead for a long time now but I'm still haunted by my consciousness. I just don't have the courage to end it. I feel like a lot of you experience the same, why haven't you specifically done it?
20 posts and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.307518

>>306125
>it wasn't fun like I thought it was
after your NEET days are over and if you don't have a comfortable job then it's truly is the end.

 No.307549

>>307493
>Very few autists enjoy life in the modern world.
Was it any better in the past? Genuine question.

 No.307550

>>307549
Fewer autists existed in the past.

 No.307568

>>307518
absolutely this. waging is soulless. so many stuff i'd like to do but come weekends i just play games and sleep because i have no willpower left for anything

 No.307569

>>307568
>so many stuff
so much



 No.297753[Reply]

How do you guys fight anhedonia? Do you have any experience with it?
I basically don't feel pleasure from anything except food, maybe. Stories, games, art don't really touch me at all and it sucks because I remember how much I loved escapism before and how it brought excitement, joy, sadness etc. Now it's all blank. I want to bring emotions back, want to bring excitement, joy, even sweet sadness would do honestly, I miss being profoundly sad.

Have any of you managed to revert to your older non-anhedonic self?
39 posts and 5 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.305610

>>302015
mind = blown

>>304656
narc

 No.305617

File: 1769901344123.jpg (313.85 KB, 1500x1000, 3:2, nicotine pouches.jpg) ImgOps iqdb

>>297753
>How do you guys fight anhedonia?
Have you tried nicotine?

 No.307413

I fight anhedonia with high ABV beer. But I only get drunk on Friday evening. I'm sober the rest of the time.

When I'm drunk (not wasted), I enjoy playing videogames, I enjoy music.

 No.307442

>>301975
>Life with anhedonai feels pointless. No pleasure, no point? Like why do anything. I just end up doing nothing

This.

 No.307449

>>305617
I tried it. It kinda works, but the nicotine burnout was unpleasant and accidently overdosing on velo pouches is worse than any hangover i've ever had



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 No.302319[Reply]

Let's discuss strategies for getting rid of pessimistic thoughts. No negativity allowed in this thread.

I know this is a meme, but taking a shower can completely turn my mood around and make my worries go away, even if it's just for a couple of hours. Listening to uplifting and happy music is also very effective for me. Sometimes I have to force myself at first, but generally it changes my mood.

What are some things you wizs do to minimize depression?
35 posts and 2 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.307384

File: 1777241663766.jpg (641.33 KB, 1280x771, 1280:771, tree.jpg) ImgOps iqdb

>Let's discuss strategies for getting rid of pessimistic thoughts.

that's the spirit! clearly stating the thing you want to happen. this helps the thing being born.

1) i believe the number one thing that helps you shake the pessimism is choice. embrace choice. choose to do everything you can to be healthy. the pessimism is a manifestation of auto pilot and choice is manual flight. you do your own flying by choosing to. you can choose to be healthy, you can choose to be an optimist, you can choose to say "this is fine" while sitting at the burning table no matter how strange and out of place it feels.

2) when sitting at a burning table, the impulse is to run. this only makes sense when there is somewhere to run though that isn't the burning table. the impulse to flee, not to be here, to be anywhere but here is a strong anchor into unconsciousness. i did this for decades with video games. i could not handle being a childslave forced to go to school where evil people who hate me violently tried to make me into cannonfodder so i played video games every second i could, trying to endure the torture. now i have endured the torture and i know nothing about this world because i've never been here. i was born in my late 30s.

3) habits are important. everything you do often enough you will start to do automatically and forget about and potentially not even notice when you are doing it. you have to choose to look at your habits and see if they are good for you. one after the other, question all your existing habits; which is way harder then it sounds because habits try to evade your scrutiny as to keep themselves alive; they develop a live on their own and develop self-preservation even. find the bad habits and reduce them gently, think of good new habits and do them often enough to experience something wonderful: you will be doing them automatically without having to spend conscious effort and willpower on them. i don't have to give my best to eat healthy, i have been doing it for so long that it is the only way i eat at this point.

i hope you can stay your course of positivity long enough for your efforts to become habit OP💪💪. i remember this wonderful feeling: when you do something that takes dedication that did not come easy to you and then one day when you are absent minded you notice that you are doing the thing without you having to force yourself whatsoever because the habit has formedPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

 No.307385

>>303386

i'm reading carl jung currently, dudeman thinks dreams are how the collective unconscious tries to communicate with you. once i started trying to write down my dreams i noticed how much i was dreaming.

 No.307386

>>306441
>Saw a workbook online called Cognitive Behavioural Workbook for Depression online and decided to order it. Will report in a couple of months if it helps.

i'll read the report. when i find it i post an interesting workbook i once bought on a whim and did about half of it. it was all about drawing statistics about your life on colorful paper.

 No.307387

>>306441
>We all hear "just lift weights bruh" but it's not the only cure for depression. It's a very effective cure, but before that you need to build up your window of tolerance. I decided to start small. I'll go out and walk my dog in park early in the morning or late in the evening when nobody's around. I also want to read more new books and go back to fingerboarding. Fingerboarding is a good hobby because

dancing or at least some form of physical expression that can slowly become a dance i believe to be a necessary part of mental health. i like to skate to music and it feels like dancing. enjoying and playing with the movement mechanics of the human body is an essential part of the puzzle i almost never hear discussed or even mentioned so let me mention it here: dancing, skating, ice skating, or maybe an artistic martial arts like capoeira are necessary. at least dance to music you love with your headphones on in your room. if this feels shameful to you, it shouldn't. dance is the antidote to this shame that society tries to install on people.

 No.307397

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>>302319
Check my thread around self-hypnosis and mind hygiene for some tech tips if you want
Good luck and have a good life.
>>307395



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 No.307373[Reply]

anyone got a good server where guys just get on and play games or just a bunch of guys who are really active and talk
im sick of these supposed "crab" servers and no ones online, im the only guy sending 100+ msgs a day and getting no reply in return so thats why i came to this imageboard cause supposedly everyone heres alone with no one irl like me

 No.307375

File: 1777187150255.png (257.4 KB, 734x506, 367:253, 7ae0f0e96366bdc1dca989aec2….png) ImgOps iqdb

find one of these is very hard, if you find one plz tell me(user was warned for this post)

 No.307376

>>307375
im in one i wanna add other guys to, u can join if u want
#######(USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST)



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 No.305809[Reply]

"Hey wizanon… did you go through a similar thing?"

I will never forgive this world, my ancestors, my genes, my family, those people. I will especially, never forgive myself. My adolesence was robbed from me. I could've eaten better, I could've been stronger, I could've said no to all the evil people who abused me, humiliated me, bullied me, took advantage of me. I can pretend to be happy in moments of fantasy, but my baseline is always depression because I have been robbed so completely.

What did I do to deserve this fate? Who was I in my past life to deserve being in such a position? If I had eaten better, I could've grown to my true height. If I had said no and held steadfast, I could've fought back against them. If I had shown some semblance of courage, I could've made happy memories in my youth.

I am 23 years old. You might say that is young. But I have lost the most important years of my growth and development. I have wasted them by suffering emotionally and physically with no fault of my own. I have wasted them by letting others rob me of what I had, my dignity, my reputation, my identity, my resources. I dropped out of school with so much hope, I was truly so happy, only to suffer far more than I ever have at the hands of forces beyond my control.

No matter what I do now, as much as I would love to believe otherwise, there is absolutely nothing I could do to compensate for what I have lost. Nothing I could do replace those days. Nothing I could do to get back what I lost forever. What's been robbed was meant to be robbed permanently. I can only mourn and ache for the rest of my life, aching for the things I was supposed to have but will never get back.
11 posts and 2 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.307158

>>307156
In his case how is this thought going to help him?

 No.307159

>>305809
>>307152
I have nothing to say to you brother but I feel the same. I relate to this on a deeper level.

 No.307160

hey iam 1.83m and i will get height surgery to make it 1.95m you should KYS now it's over for you

 No.307166

File: 1776573286904.jpg (230.96 KB, 1280x1700, 64:85, 1cd018b7f86e7e8c6a9d5af1f3….jpg) ImgOps iqdb

>>305809
>I am 23 years old. You might say that is young. But I have lost the most important years of my growth and development.
yes, but don't worry, that is all still too little compared to the future

 No.307246

>>305809
Yes, I went through something similar. I regret not running away or hanging myself as a teenager. There is this wish to permanently leave this world through hanging. Soon I will experience what comes after death. If there is nothing I will stop experiencing this nightmare too.



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 No.306157[Reply][Last 50 Posts]

Post here if you don't have enough to say for a new thread, but it's too depressing for the crawl thread.
ice cold edition
304 posts and 31 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.307256

>>307022
>>307020
kiwifarms drove him to suicide.

 No.307358

My schizophrenic voices harassing me again. I don't believe they originate from inside my head, but try to talk to people about this idea and it degenerates into "No, absolutely not you schizo and if you think anything outside purely material reality exists you need to kill yourself" or "Yeah I agree! And the pyramids are sending me signals telling me I need to construct the next ark of the covenant in order to summon a star god"

 No.307592

hmmm look at that landscape, it looks so lonely, as if someone could get drepressed there

 No.307740

>>306830
You're welcome

The answer there is recognising gates and plateaus of skill. What ability and degree of competence unlocks a gate to the *next* dependent relevant skill, and how far you can/should pursue it before diminishing returns becomes a factor, and what signals indicate you need to maintain your skill level, because everything decays that is not maintained.

Currently I'm working towards making good steaks consistently in a gas range - because I haven't had a gas range all my adult life.

The path is - make omlettes, by which I learned heat control and temperature management + an understanding of what makes a good pan.
Then pan fried peppers, by which I learned correct and effective methods for chopping and ingredient prep + purchasing and becoming familiar with suitable cutlery, because 'a knife' is not just a knife and there are wide gulfs between them.
Then - eventually, not there yet - custom cuts of meat to a specific grade, for a specific cooking strategy.

A big problem with western - and very specifically American/Taylorisation, is the idea that a skill can be taught out of whole cloth, that the necessary steps just need to be followed, however long it may be from point zero, to achieve a goal. Think the rejection of phonics because "Every adult just reads the same way and we are wasting time teaching sounds when letters are what matter."

This is simply not the case, the correct approach demonstrated by kaizen in .jp is continuous plateaued improvement, where some skills simply exist to scaffold the development of the higher order skills necessary to achieve the actual goal. I've recently Re-read The Puritan Gift which goes into great detail why the second method works, and why the first and wrong method became popular and entrenched.

 No.308429

>>306780

>Like you wanted something, but were denied and not only rejected, but maybe shouted at for being selfish for even harboring desires.


Scary thing is, the definition of "sin" is so easy to manipulate literally any expression of ego can be labelled as a mortal sin or two or more.

>Eventually you stop

Sad!

Just in case.
Today, I had an argument. A battle of egos, basically. Good thing it was a relatively peaceful talk…


[Last 50 Posts]

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 No.306888[Reply]

Hey mages, wizards, posting this here so some may see it instead of just throwing it in a doc somewhere.

I love life. For a period of about two to three years I was empty and melancholic with constant suicidal thoughts. But now I can't hate the world, the struggle of life moves my soul; the clouds, the sea, the stars, flowers, the wind, it all is so amazing to witness. Most of all I love people, for what they can be, seeing the rare phenomenon of a genuine person, be it in person, through their words, or through something they made, tugs at me like nothing else. And it's not like my life has materially gotten much better, I got out of my nagging bitch aunts house but otherwise not much has changed.
But this transformation has only made everything hurt more, going out amongst the normgroids deeply upsets me because they squander themselves for nothing. But even then I cant bring myself to hate how much it hurts.
If you're reading this mage it'd mean a lot to see you chase your dreams, I don't believe in that crap about humans only being able to care about a certain number of people.
35 posts and 3 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.307146

>>307060
Like I said its their potential, what they can be; what they are is disgusting but what they can be is better than anything. You get small glimpses of what is deep inside of people but they are so focused on avoiding discomfort and wallowing in their pleasure they never even try to move towards that.

 No.307147

>>306892
Because I am better than them.

 No.307148

>>306906
You're a fat retard

 No.307149

>>306906
And the reason you're a fat retard is because you're living like an animal. Only animals mindlessly avoid unpleasant sensations, humans go beyond them because we can choose, of our own will, not by conditioning, to not avoid them and even impose them on ourselves. What growth isnt unpleasant? If you're a fatass starving will objectively improve your life yet its unpleasant while continuing to stuff your face is pleasant.

Being a low iq nigger that only thinks about how to feel good isnt smart.

 No.307153

>>307149
>humans go beyond them because we can choose, of our own will, not by conditioning, to not avoid them and even impose them on ourselves
What are you even talking about you dead ass mongoloid, you can choose to impose pain on yourself? Wow of course you can, but this has nothing to do with my argument.
I argued life is terrible because we must endure unpleasant sensations AGAINST OUR WILL, like who the fuck chooses to get cancer? Yet you can be diagnosed with it one day.
We are thrown into the world by our parents and then forced to endure torture or kill ourselves. This is the reality of our world.



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 No.307038[Reply]

Other people make my life unhappy and miserable
I just wanna be left alone
What is worse then having to fight with other people toget what you want every step of the way
7 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.307079

>>307051
Sounds more like a nigger said this

 No.307080

>>307068
ok so?
what can be taken away from that quote?
it's like saying
"a car without fuel is useless"
well yeah duh
so?

 No.307081

>>307080
That's a really stupid interpretation of the statement. There's no need to deduce something so clear to similes involving material utlilty.
>A man who has the knowledge but lacks the power clearly to express it is no better off than if he never had any ideas at all.
Means that doing things ends up getting those things done, while just thinking about doing those things doesn't. There's no reason to revere those who simply think. Such reverence is especially unnecessary in the context of reflection, i.e don't get an ego boner because you know how to solve a problem but are too lazy to actually fix that issue. Your contribution to resolving the issue as someone who knows but does not do is worth the same as that from someone who doesn't know and doesn't do, because they both bring about the same results. tl;dr Do it, faggot.

I can't figure out the quote's relevance to this thread, but on the whole it applies to /dep/ well
>I want to die soo sooo bad and I've learned 500 ways to kill myself from suicide handbooks but I absolutely can not and will not kill myself because uuh willpower or predetermism or my mom will turn me in to a vegetable or something. You must pity me and revere me as though I am someone who actually did take his life though because me and him are like totally the same, in fact I am suffering more than they guy who actually did die.

 No.307084

>>307038
What is worse?
People acting like they know everything about you from taking just one look at you, or from reading just one of your posts. If you take their misguided advice, you will not only fight with other people on your way, but you will be going the wrong way entirely.

 No.307086

>>307044
Extreme laziness, gooning, idling in the comfort zone for too long.



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 No.306923[Reply]

I feel an immense disgust with the fact that I inhabit a human body. It manifests most acutely when I must face a physical process in action. Examples being; having to urinate or defecate, or having an erection. Defecating is particularly bad. I become aware that I am a worthless ape. I feel suicidal when I must wipe shit from my anus. Maybe you laugh at reading such a sentence, but it is truly horrible. I feel particularly demoralised and depleted when I realise that normalfags get to experience reality free from this burden. They do not fixate on the weight of their body, the terror of possessing a spine. They are not reminded that they are nothing but an animated flesh puppet when they face sexual arousal. It all feels like a cruel joke.
1 post omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.306925

I can't relate cuz I really like pooping.

I do hate having a physical body though, but mostly because meatspace is so cumbersome. Having to move around, all the tiny complexities of real life that make things a hassle, tripping, hitting myself against objects in my house, things falling out of my hand, spilling drinks… I also hate how vulnerable my body is, one poke with a sharp object and I'm probably dead, all the gooey stuff just leaks out.

I would much prefer to be a glowing orb of light or some shit, no physical body, just pure MIND. Maybe soon, after I finally rope.

 No.306938

I am incompatible with living on a very deep and fundamental level. I am 30 and I feel like human bodies after this burst of youth and vitality in the teens and twenties are just slow rotting flesh machines which aren't worth living in. To maintain this rotting machine you must waste away at some job for most of your existence. Why should I bother if I can just hang myself ?
You receive this psychological hostility from other humans with lies, gaslighting, petty torment etc. Why shouldn't I just leave ? Finally there is everyday life, everything is dirty, noisy, unpleasant. I can't say I'm unhappy that I am hanging myself.

 No.307006

>>306938
I think much of the despair and nihilism in our culture is due to the fact we almost universally have to go through debilitating old age now. It's weird, in the olden days you could be pretty confident you'd drop dead sometime in your 40s, even the 50s was a gift.

People used to drop dead from disease within a few years of their bodies giving out.

 No.307007

>>307006
Are normies even despairing? They seem to enjoy this soulless and nihilistic behavior.

 No.307032

I always wished I could be a floating shape, like in Flatland. And to emit light at will. I could explore everywhere on earth, travel the bottom of the ocean, wander through forests, explore caves… I'd want to either be a 3d cube or 2d triangle. Eventually I'd go to space to explore and never look back



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