/dep/ - Depression

>>303527
> Find the forum >>303381 mentioned, there's a guide there on inert gas asphyxiation.
You mean the one that just the other day was ousted as being a troll honeypot ran by negro "femcels"?

Why is everyone talking only about hanging, heights, guns and drugs? Is this all there is? Hanging is the only viable method when you have little money.

I'm more interested in some learning resources. I can't believe nobody explored the topic of poisons, I'm very much interested in the results. Poison sounds like overall the smartest choice.

>>298222
Question about doorknob hanging, what's stopping me from grabbing the rope or grabbing the doorknob and trying to free myself? Likewise if regular hanging what's stopping you from just grabbing onto the rope?

2 attempted ODs now and both times I bottled it and got hospitalised. Thank fuck my country's health care is dog shit so I wasn't sectioned and can try again when I nut up. I fear I never will and the suffering will continue indefinitely.

>>303725
Nothing. I dunno how a regular hanging would work, even if you grabbed it for a while, would you eventually tire and have to give up?
Anyway, that's how I failed the doorknob, I guess. I don't really remember what happened. I think I panicked as my consciousness faded and got out somehow. Maybe I jerked out or threw my hands up or something. I suppose the people who can do it are the ones really committed, who can go long enough to get to the point where it's too late to try and help yourself. Maybe I wasn't drunk enough.

That was a long time ago and good and bad things have happened to me since then. I don't think I would've missed out on much if I'd been successful, but I'm no longer in a place where I'm suffering enough to try again, even if I still think about it.

>>303374
if you think a delay is bad, i cant imagine what you think of a permanent denial like wizchan

take 10 mg oral minoxidil or more daily

1mg finasteride a day will keep the balding away.

The main problem is losing the halo effect.

I was probably about a 5/10 or 6/10 before so people generally were indifferent to me. As a balding man I'm easily 3/10 which is low enough to be a target. Better to get a wig and move to a new city so I can go back to being left alone

Though my hairline is getting worse, it's not over yet; but I feel like any haircut I have is just an attempt to de-emphasize it and delay the inevitable. I had to look inside myself to figure out why it was bothering me so much. I realised I had been lying to myself a little, and I had to stop dragging this out. Free myself. The hair had to go.
As wizards we are actually blessed to not concern ourselves with thoughts of what succubi might think about our appearance, so I'm not sure why anyone here should care about being bald or shaving their head. It was liberating when I finally bit the bullet at 30. I enjoyed the shocked expressions of my colleagues and the joking comparisons to Derek Vinyard. Now I have my sister shave my head every week and it saves me all that money and hassle involved with going to a barber.

I think a lot of people are telling on themselves in this thread with their view on balding. Perhaps my views are a little influenced by my country, where I've never heard talk of 'minoxidil' and 'finasteride'–only ever on the internet–so it honestly appears very vain and a half-step away from flying to Turkey for a hair transplant.

Embrace it, friend. Stop caring about what /they/ think.

Oh, I also like what someone else said about how this is probably going to be the kindest form of aging to you lol, so I think it's best to deal with this head-on as there's going to be a lot more coming down the line that a pill can't save you from…

>>298058
If you have to ask, then your situation might not be as bad as you think. Death is a scary thing and it's hard to go through with it unless your life is permanently ruined, which is rare.

>>302162
>unless your life is permanently ruined, which is rare
it's not rare, it takes one traumatic event to ruin it forever

I enjoy my escapism and engage in some productive activites for the sake of my mental health.
I really don't think society has any right to shit on me given how retarded and clownish it is. Not that anyone cares about my existence in the first place.

>>302162
/thread

>>298058
I am alone but I not lonely.

Your question does not exist.

>>302917
I was considering smoking but it doesn't do anything for me. Weed as well, tried it about 4 times and I just feel a little tired. I wish I could experience the happiness its often associated with

>>302637
Because this could mean a beer (330ml) each day, or chugging 2.4L on any given day of the week.

>>303153
same situation
i just drink anyway lmao
and sometimes it goes away
it depends on how severe your GERD is

>>303344
It's gotten worse with age, will probably fuck up my esophagus if I'm not careful. at its worst it feels like there's molten lava in my chest. so i've been cutting back.

i've tried anti-acid tablets but it makes it worse in the long term i noticed, better to just drink a lot of water - and never imbibe on an empty stomach.

>>303691
I had a GERD-like booshi back in 2019


in 2020, I realised it was the "not so spicy" spicy food from work that was doing the inflaming stuff to me

>>303239
and here she is giving him a kiss

>>303238
It sounds like she really loved you. I believe in fate, that certain souls are just meant to find each other.

>>303241
Are you saying you believe in true love?

>>303243
I think so, like you(?) describe in >>303238. It's a kind of metaphysical thing, like some souls are just linked or something.

bumping good thread yur chicken is cool

>>300165
>I can even enter a trance like state where I am half-asleep and half-awake
That happens to me when I nap for longer than I need to. I get this weird-ass tingly feeling and feel like my soul is getting sucked out of my head. I also sometimes get visions which look as real as if I was seeing them with my own eyes. It's quite a nice feeling. Maybe that's the shit that monks feel when they meditate

>>300049
Pic rel is actually me sleeping

>>303016
You're not a cute wittle anime succubus. This isn't the website to act gay like that.

>>303016
Jizzed

>>303016
What are you, a 10000 ton ship?

>>296567
It's possible to pretend to fit in but it requires being in constant pain. It sucks.

>>296567
>Life is all about one thing. Being born without autism.
A part of me knew that all along, even at 13 I expected that I'd end up as a hikikomori, and I was correct.
I tried self improvement, I tried "making it" I tried everything, but I got a chronic illness somewhere along the way from the stress, and my entire life crashed and burned as a result.
And sure, I take medication that makes life manageable, but if my best effort WHEN HEALTHY is not enough then what is? Needless to say, I'm just trying to live out my days in limbo, hopefully there's not too many left.

I found a cozy no-colleagues job


problem is, i am terrified of the idea having this job taken away from me because… stuff.

what do?

>>303207
not true at all btw

>>303207
ah, so its like schizophrenia in USSR - anyone could get a "latent schizophrenia" and an N year "treatment" for being a bother for some brute with a star on his aching shoulder.

I've been suicidal for years. I always wondered why the demiurge made it so difficult to just quit this life. Why didn't he just include a button on the human body that could be pressed by a suffering soul to simply and painlessly escape. Probably because he's a sadistic piece of complete shit.

>>303332
>even if you rationally don't believe in it anymore, just believe its in your self-interest to believe
i'm not a retard so i can't do this

I don't know what to do. I'm around 21 and I go to uni. I've been struggling with porn use and procrastination in general. I'm also not doing too good in uni. One thing is that I just don't have any friends at all for the past 2-3 years. I feel so sad, I just feel like I'm in a deep dark pit I can't get of. The porn use is the worst, I just can't seem to get over it. There was a period around 3 years ago where I was able to give it up for around 3 months but since then it's almost always stuck with me. It's not mastrubation that's the problem, but rather the porn usage, once I start watching it in the day I just can't stop. I don't know what to do at all. I think I would feel much less sadder if I was able to masturbate alone quickly rather than watching porn for hours. On every internet platform I use I'm always a lurker, I've never told people about my problems and I don't know what to do. I feel as if I'm losing myself to all this and I just don't know what to do. There's also the problem of money, I'm not rich, and due to money problems I have to bare some problems that would be solved if I had money. This is also a reason for the depression, and I'm not in a country where it's easy to earn money that is worth it in terms of the time that you spend earning it and that is in the scenario that you're able to find work in the first place which is already a tough scenario. I don't know why I'm typing all this here, maybe it's because this place has people similar to me. Rather than talking to me about how to solve my problems, it would be better if I was able to talk to just someone in general or someone who was able to get to a better place, I already know how to try to solve my problems, but I just can't bring myself to take these steps. I'm pretty sure I'm addicted to the internet, it's all just a host of things that have been festering inside my head for years, like a bad fridge you don't clean out. I don't exercise either because it is a bit inconvenient for me. I also have a very minor medical problem, but I'm pretty sure it would be solved or at least slightly allievated if I just had some money, that too just kind of depresses me. I don't know how to make progress, I don't know what to do.

>>303636
You sound like me 5-6 years ago when I started uni during the first wave of lockdowns. Was awesome at first, not leaving the house and playing games all day but soon I started exclusively living on the computer. Porn usage went up, just grinding games mindlessly without enjoyment etc. I still deal with porn addiction and procrastination and still haven't finished my degree yet. Similar to you I am somewhat socially isolated and have nobody to talk to about this in real life on a level that goes deeper than self deprecating jokes about "I hate my life I am useless lmao". You say you know what steps you need to take to solve your problems but be careful that you are actually treating the cause, not just the symptom. Porn addiction, like all addictions are often just a coping strategy for unmet emotional needs. Until you figure out what those are (what material do you usually jerk off to, what kinds of feelings are you trying to avoid when you boot up porn etc) you will be powerless to stop the addiction. I had to realize that my porn usage is as compulsive because I trained myself at a young age that my sexuality was a bad thing and that succubi don't want anything to do with it. So porn became the only outlet. Then as I got older and more isolated, other things got added like feeling loved, having someone else take control (especially when IRL you always feel like you're struggling just to survive) and so on. So now I can at least name the things that trigger the addiction and I can try to deal with those. Progress is slow and life goes on. If you are not a normal with a social circle, regular things will be much harder for you. Try to finish your degree if you think it's worth anything on the job market later, even if it takes you longer. I tried getting out of academia and into a job and always got rejected, likely because they just saw a failed student who was too old. So beware of that. Otherwise make up your mind and quit now if you can find an okay job that will bring you stability. But in my estimation, you need to do some deep emotional introspection before you start to act. Godspeed

>>303638
thank you for this

>>302259
THOSE ARE THE MOST HUMANITARIAN CARREER PROSPECTS IMAGINABLE


And OP is probably a "normal" introvert rather than a "proper" neurodiverted awootist

>>302233
>I don't know if I don't have a personality
that is your personality, a weird guy :)

normalfag

>>302233
What made you want to be a teacher in the first place? Did you have an internship yet? You do know that middle and high schoolers are 20000% worse than adult normalfags right? Unless you're confident and witty your next 50 years working as a teacher will be a hell of getting made fun of by zoomers every working hour and yelling to get them to shut up and listen because if those retards don't graduate, you get the axe, and suddenly all the pedagogy that you studied will mean nothing (because it really means nothing). Fucking quit dude, I'm serious.

>>302259
Nah it sucks shit. I went straight to doing a master's after college to, ironically, teach college classes myself and while actually teaching the classes was fun, spending time with the absolute retarded dorks that are your fellow teachers, and especially grading tests and homework, really aren't worth it. The first year was fun but even in my second year, realising I would be using the same lesson plan for the rest of my career was enough to be suicide fuel. I quit after that and pivoted to a CS postgraduate degree in Austin. Now I work from home watching youtube videos for 5 hours or more a day making more than triple what I earned previously. Thinking about becoming a private tutor for fun though.

The only upside I can see is that in college, the students generally shut their asses up when you explain something to them.

bump with a sad "if i could re-run it":


should have spent 4 years learning how to twist nuts and earn $$$ by renovating some rich folks' apartments downtown.

>>303292
Great thread served warm straight from the gurgling bowels of nu social media news aggregates that promote hypochondria lifestyle! Don't forget to take a dozen supplements, try out a new fad diet each month and exert yourself until your heart skips beats regularly because other fellow wizzies who got brainwashed, such as >>303338, told you so.

If this works as an incentive for losing weight then good luck to you. I can tell you how it's on the other side of the fence. I feel exactly like you except I have always eaten less, I guess.

>>303643
>try out a new fad diet each month and exert yourself until your heart skips beats regularly because other fellow wizzies who got brainwashed, such as >>303338.

Go ahead and be a whiny retarded faggot who doesn't want his life to change. but dont complain when your problems dont solve themselves

Like I said high T isn't permanent. There are ups and downs naturally. If a lot has to be done then grit your teeth and get it done. Relaxation feels that much better when it's earned in effort and sweat. sometimes through scrapes and bruises. Even children know this

People often wish they had high T, or lie about it online, but it exists for a reason and compels you into action. If you think this is some normie platitude then rot. Just keep rotting because there is no other option for you

>>303655
image sauce??

>>303656
>>303656
based on Mafumafu (singer)