I didn't know where to post this, but I guess it might help people with little sadness a little bit.
I was reading here and watching videos (some buddhist-yoga-psychology-magick related things) and reading some books
>For mind-body techniques and other phenomenahttps://www.psychonaut.tech/>For drugs and other altered stated of mind and other phenomenahttps://psychonautwiki.org/wiki/Main_Pagehttps://m.psychonautwiki.org/wiki/Main_Pageand I do this some days (Maybe it just a placebo, but this relax me.)
>Give yourself massages on your legs, head, face, and scalp (scalp massages).>Rinse your eyes with water, exercise your eyes by looking sideways for a while. watch the sun for 2 seconds (more bright colors temporally)>Make a kasina-tatraka with a wall or a classic color disc or anything healthy you want>Focus on your breathing for a while (breath by nose and not mouth)>Count breath to 64 or ignore toughts and persist>Practice metta and place one hand on your chest-heart (and the other on your stomach to feel more warmth if you want)>stimulate the vagus nerve for 1 minute (by your hands or do other another method, you re warned if you're old, have heart-nervous problems or use machines for doing this)>Put your body against the wall, sitting on the wall with your legs pointing toward the ceiling to lower your blood pressure and lighten your heart beat (do kasina against wall or breath chill) so legs up the wall in L pose.>Stay away from phone or pc for a while, even radio or news bullshit>breathing through the nose and diaphragmatic breathing>Give yourself massages again>Get a large-mid mirror and Look at yourself in the mirror for a while, but not in the form of kasina-tatraka or scrying, rather in a relaxed manner. Smile, comb your hair, massage yourself, touch your face, and spend some time like this, just play doing stupid things (warned if you're schizo)>Sing anything you want in soft-voice>move your neck with rhytm while listen trance-happy or ambient music or even sad nostalgic music>go out and breath fresh air, stay on the sun sometime>cold shower or ritual baths>drink more water>Spend more time with your pets (or other good family members if you want)>Pay attention to the junk food you are eating.>Make your bed and tidy your room (and open the damn window sometimes, if you can… bro)>do exercize or light cardio>Light candles or burn incense before going to sleep to increase the likelihood of having pleasant dreams.>try more meditation or ritual ceremonial shit just for put a placebo on your head that everything will be ok>if you know how, mix everything with visualizations and other things.>write problems on paper (yeah cringe) and later delete it if you want>do some sygils arts just for the fun, no need to make believe on it but very therapeutic if you take the time to do art>learn how to visualize things or self hypnosis>learn how to have OBE (out of body experiences)I do some of these things sometimes and i feel fucking relaxed to a point of no return.
I recommend that you check everything to see if there are any adverse medical effects in your case. Meditation is not for everyone, especially if you are not in good mental health and etc.