/dep/ - Depression

Just enjoy the good times while they last and hope you aren't brought back here when you get your sweet release of death.

Death being the end is too good to be true.

>>290290
>Death being the end is too good to be true
I fear this is true I don't want to wake up again

>>290291
You were already ripped out of the void into this planet, there is no guarantee it wont happen again even if you commit suicide.

It might be on a completely different planet in a completely different galaxy. But there is still a chance you have to be reborn.
Over and over and over with no escape. No memory of knowledge of your past existences, since it wont really be "you", it will just be a bunch of atoms that organize in a way that creates consciousness somewhere in the universe.

That's what is hellish about life. The idea that even suicide might not be the final escape, you close your eyes after taking a sip of pentobarbital, the next experience you have is as a 2 year old humanoid who starts forming his first memories 200 trillion miles away from Earth.

Fuck this life.
There really is no solace except trying to be as comfortable as you can in the current existence, and even that is impossible for billions of people.

I'm aware that everyone perceives their own suffering the strongest. There are a lot of people who suffer so much I have to avert my eyes to not get my already low mood even lower. I hate watching documentaries about people in some village working 16 hours a day processing nuts or something.

This might just be 1st world privilege and immaturity but I feel like there is this special kind of "slow burn" suffering when you are shown all the heights of life but also you are not allowed to have them and if you are allowed something you know it won't last. It's like I'm on the street starving and some rich guy holds this wagyu steak to my face. And when I do finally try one I know I can afford to only try it once and then it's back to stale bread and water.

Also I am an atheist but I start to wonder if we exist for the entertainment of someone by the way we humans rarely are satisfied with what we have and cause our own problems because of boredom and ambition.

>>290296
You're suffering because you can observe that there is a hierarchy (or maybe multiple of them) and that certain humans get to experience things that you don't. On the one hand, you realize that you are not on the bottom and that it could be worse, that you could be working 16 hours a day in some shithole turd world country, but that doesn't seem enough to shake the envy and demotivation at seeing the heaps of people above you that are born with a silver spoon or a genetically superior body and mind, that not only do not suffer the same as you do, but also experience many good things that you can only see on television and social media.

>>290297
For some reason, maybe because of prolonged isolation, I have a strong sense of individuality despite having quite a low opinion of myself. I understand that the odds of being born into super wealth are near 0 but I can't help but think of life as a video game where goals exist to be reached rather than just this thing that evolved where everything is a consequence of something biological. Like how with genetics and with chance there will be people born into circumstances that will allow them an amazing life of wealth and self-fulfilment. Not because they were destined by a higher power but just random chance. Same way I am suffering as a loser not because of some punishment but again chance. Yet I can't help but try to apply some kind of video game-y movie like narrative to life. To see myself as some kind of punished hero being teased by images of things I can't have.

Idk man I'm getting quite burnt out talking about these kind of things. It all seems pointless. Most of the time I get ignored, told to grow/man up or "it is what it is". I think I just need to accept myself as a cog in a biological machine and just see the thoughts that try to make sense of it all as my mind going crazy.

'And I declared that the dead, who had already died, are happier than the living, who are stilt alive. But better than both is the one who has never been born, who has not seen the evil that is done under the sun.'

>>290315
Quads and quads and quads of sperm who could've been, didn't and they were the true lucky ones. In the end the people who is born is cursed.

>>290315
This is just unconstructive. You are already here and dying doesn't satisfy any desire. Might as well try to think of ways to make existance better.

>>290297
>not only do not suffer the same as you do, but also experience many good things that you can only see on television and social media.

Idk man it seems like suffering is a universal part of life. We all lack perspective because we only know our own life. So the rich and beautiful people got used to their wealth and now have new problems. It's the hedonic treadmill. They might be happier overall but it's not the ideal existance one might think. There are of course rich content people but I think it's more because of their personality and less about the wealth.

I don't get the point of suicide or constantly pondering on it.

>>290538
If you don't want to die then you are entirely too comfortable.

>>290538
because you don't suffer like me

I don't think you can, because all of us are the demiurge. Parts of a whole cycling through scenarios (consciousness). You've probably cycled through enough suffering on a loop for all eternity. It's a nightmare if you think about it, absolutely horror. What i do know is, if you see entities when you pass do not speak to them. Do not go into the light. Stay in the dark. I would love if it all meant nothing and there is an ending. That's what i call "nothingness", God. Even the name God is beneath it. Keep struggling.

>>290555
I'd say I'm mentally stable and love the virgin life.

whether there actually is a demiurge that needs to be escaped remains to be shown. however remaining calm and rational and confident in the power of our souls to make it to a better place than this world seems like a very sound strategy against such a being if he/it really does exist.

>>290555
>If you don't want to die then you are entirely too comfortable.
you realize that being suicidal is not a normal state, right?

>>290885
"normal" is a social construct. Nomal people are the sickest (Erich Fromm)

>>290892
being sick is wanting to kill yourself and feeling sadness, anxiety, depression, frustration all the time.

It's not a social construct that you are mentally ill.

wizcel is an acceptable term here now? Jesus fucking christ

>>290892
> Orthodox Jewish parents
>strongly involved in Zionism, under the influence of the religious Zionist rabbi Nehemia Anton Nobel.[6] He was very active in Jewish Studentenverbindungen and other Zionist organisations
every time

>>290911
>>290911
I was just recently watching the new "X-men" cartoon and realized its (((creator))) originally intended the comic/show as a social critique of traditional society and its unwillingness to accept abnormal people (mutants). This unwillingness is cast dramatically as extreme unreasonable hatred. The strongest mutant (Magneto) is naturally a jewish character. Children of course rationally have no understanding of these things when watching a simple cartoon, but I do think that it works to quietly erode their sense of group or racial exclusiveness and therefrom by reflex extend sympathy to people who are nothing like themselves. Comic books are another avenue of jewish social engineering.

>>290927
the outcasts aren't necessarily people from different races.

>>290927
Reading on the topic, I find that Magneto wasn't always jewish. It was only after 18 years since the introduction of the character that they made him a jew.

And the guy responsible for this change in the heritage of the character was a jewish writer, Chris Claremont, who is a notable and popular figure in the comic industry and innovated and took a serious approach to comic writing. He also holds the longest stint writing X-men, sixteen consecutive years, so he's left an imprint.

The demiurge is a meme from /x/ like goetia, angels, the parasite pill, remote viewing, and the nobody. If you've internalized it that means you've spent too much time on the imageboards

>>290988
i'm not an /x/tard so i don't know what parasite pill and the nobody are, but the rest of those things are real and not memes. you can start to experiment by trying astral projection.

>>290992
So what do you actually see and experience while you AP? Would you have decided it was le demiurge if you hadn't heard about it through the internet
>there must be a supreme being
>there must be a supreme being that created a false reality
>the supreme being that created the false reality must be evil
quite the unsupported deduction

>>290993
>Would you have decided it was le demiurge if you hadn't heard about it through the internet
you can prove metaphysically that there must be an entity that created this world and sustains it, but not in the way you have in mind as implied by the following lines. it's similar to the reasoning used by modern philosophers to argue for an external world and other minds, and not the ontological or creationist arguments. the problem is that they have fallacious materialist presuppositions to begin with so everything they derive is also fallacious (e.g., one fallacy is that they assume that if something is outside one's own mind, and perhaps also outside of that of all humans and animals, it automatically is something non-mental and of an entirely different kind, i.e., material, or physical, etc.; another fallacy is that they assume a mind depends on something external to itself to exist). that established, all that is then needed is to put together a great bulk of these experiences and testimonials people have during AP, RV, and NDEs. we can find there a common thread which leads to some conclusions about the nature of this particular world (which is not by itself the beginning and end of all reality and existence).

regardless, there is a key insight included in what you're saying and it is what i think determines whether one is an /x/tard, and that is whether one merely takes at face value and believes literally everything that one encounters during those practices, instead of having a more "meta" and empirical approach to analyzing it as more data and what factors influece those experiences (one's thoughs, beliefs, and emotions, for example, that they read something online, like you point out, and so on). if a christian dies and comes back to tell us what he saw, it is pretty much always something that follows from their christian beliefs, e.g., they saw jesus, or maybe they were in hell, maybe god tells them it was only so they'd change their ways 'cause that is what they're heading to, etc. of course, the same thing is prominent in these modern "don't go into the light", "escaping prison planet", etc., online communities. they take mdma and say how they looked at the sky and saw the grid around the earth, etc. that is how most people naturally are, but we have to be more objective and critical.

the key insight is that our thoughts, beliefs, and emotions create reality, but because we're not alone and there's all sorts of realms and creatures out there, which themselves have evolved to be how they are (and we're not really human anyway, the same way that one playing a character on a video game is not that character, their species, etc.), there's a way that things are and objective truths beyond a mere person's beliefs. and free will is a fundamental aspect of the mind so things have come this and not to something else. this entire "physical" world is a ultimately a very stable and powerful mental construct. the truth is that we are all already under the control of extra-dimensional entities, and this is what we can gather from putting together all testimonals and experiences, interpreting them critically and not at face value as in, "yes, this christian lady actually met jesus".

>>290999
I'm interested in what you specifically experienced while astral projecting and what specific testimonies you would quote to support the idea of a demiurge. I own several books on AP and have tried monroe, my assessment is it's an exercise in using strong internal mental imagery

Demiurge is derived from a Greek word originally meaning craftsman. One interpretation in the mystical Christian tradition of Gnosticism states that the material universe was created when Sophia (Wisdom) attempted to emanate (and this is a simplification the actual account given in various Christian apologists/Church Fathers of the Gnostics, who they viewed as heretical are more involved) without her partner or ayzygy. Durning this process the demiurge sometimes named Yaldabaoth created the material universe which was viewed as something that never should have been; hence the neverending suffering characteristic of this life. Gnostics did believe in a manner I'm unclear about that theres is a way to reunite with the primordial and unindividuated One or God which would be an ideal existence free of suffering.

Should read "syzygy" (meaning yoking) in place of "azygy"

>>291001
>I'm interested in what you specifically experienced while astral projecting
(i originally had typed quite a lot here, but i realize that you're asking in relation to these matters.) i don't have personal experiences with these beings and actually decided to avoid this sort of topics some years ago because i don't want it to leak into my private mental world and bring me closer to realms i'd rather not. but there's overwhelming evidence regardless that we all will encounter these beings when we die, but it doesn't seem that there's, at that point, anything to fear (if they can't deceive or guilt-trip you into reincarnating they are known to pull other, somewhat silly, tactics to make you quickly forget what's going on, like telling you to walk over somewhere and wait in a line, etc. — more latter on how we even know this). i also avoid all relation to supernatural entities as the ones you listed and that are common in occult spaces (but have inevitably formed a certain sort of connection to some beings i unaware devoted too much emotional and mental energy).

>what specific testimonies you would quote to support the idea of a demiurge
as i said in the previous post, and as i detailed at length in a theory i posted in another demiurge thread some years ago, the idea of a demiurge can be derived from a few basic metaphysical premises and some observations on how this world works, but what you're more interested in is all the other information on this world's prison-nature and its reincarnation trap. no one has put together a better compilation of it than the creator of the escaping prison planet subreddit ( [link](https://www.reddit.com/r/EscapingPrisonPlanet/comments/pyijav/ive_researched_the_afterlife_for_nearly_10_years/) ), though there is, like i said in the previous post, much retardation in that place.

i think that guy's posts should be a good intro, after which you can notice instances of it all over in, e.g., new age types, many of whom have also come upon these phenomena but interpret it in a different (retarded) way. someone i find very interesting is thomas campbell, he's the physicist monroe mentions in far journeys who invented hemi-sync. he's mastered ap as much as it seems to be possible and his experiences validate completely this prison planet theory — however, he interprets them the other way around, that this is a training center for consciousness to learn and evolve, the usual new age silliness. but anyway, this guys talks of a time when he'd be working for the people running this simulated world, where he'd be at the "reality frame" (that's his term, which i do find very useful for distinguishing between "worlds") in which people who die go to be reincarnated, and doing things like the one i described above of telling people to go wait in some line so they'd quickly forget their past life, like one quickly forgets the dream they were having when they get up to do something, so that they'd accept reincarnating without quibbles.

>monroe
monroe is in fact one of the sources for this theory, see far journeys.

>it's an exercise in using strong internal mental imagery
i'm not a fan of monroe's works in general because i find travelogue ap books to be painfully boring, but i can assure you that you don't need any mental imagery for ap, and there are many persons in ap sites who have aphantasia. what you need is to maintain self-awareness while your body falls asleep. as the body is falling asleep images and sounds start to appear, and not as if you were imagining it (nikola tesla also describes doing exactly that and going to other worlds just as real as this one). but it's tricky because if you get distracted by thoughts you lose that thread of self-awareness and switch to auto-pilot like everyone does every night, and if you start to examine the images too early they vanish.

finally, to conclude this post that is getting too lengthy, the reason why i recommended ap in the first place is because it's a phenomenon that anyone can actually experience for themselves regardless of how skeptical they are about it or how ridiculous it may seem at first, and is one way one can directly experience the supernatural without relying on what other people and texts say. instead of monroe, i recommend [frank kepple](astralpulse.com/frankkepple.html) since he takes a more critical and empirical approach to it than monroe.

>>291005
As per your link
>Evidence under hypnosis
>Evidence under past-life regression hypnosis
>cobbled together Gnosticism
>remote viewing
>David Icke
>Psychedelics as direct evidence
>A CIA agent, various other bullshit peddlers
IE hokum. I've read this one before, and it is exactly what I'm talking about as peak /x/. I personally think Monroe is fraudulent after observing in his first book that he was unable to even accurately verify a basic OOB projection test. I've lucid dreamed of course and practiced mental imagery but that is not the same as claiming a person literally enters different planes of existence doing so.

peak /x/ is when people mold together various religious traditions with trendy new age concepts and not a lick of evidence proving it. Oh well

>>290892
That isn't even an argument. You will never enjoy life with your mentality.
You don't have to be miserable, we are all going to die so why add more fuel to the fire.

what level of confidence do you guys have that once we've finally died we'll be at peace forever from whatever the hell this wretched existence actually is?

>>290289
Hello buddy, I see that your post was insanely subjective and seem to come from hatred of Life and God.

But don't worry this hatred is not absurd and you're right, But don't be hatefully ignorant, Life is trully a punishment but you must know beyond punishment that the life you were given is atleast better than what the other misfortunate person had.

Be thankful that you atleast see and live in a better place and can afford internet and electricity and water. I know this may seem as sophism but truly you need to be thankful that in this punished World atleast you had the advantage 60% didn't have.

>>291507
It seems unlikely that we will be reborn in the same conditions, but since we don't know what consciousness actually is we can't say for sure that we do not live again. Things are always worse than imagination.

>>291507
Zero. There is no escape.

>>291747
false, ultra false.

i practice tens of times every day to be ready to dodge this fucker when i finally happily die.

>>291507
It is dependent in how you live. If you are a degenerate normalnigger or a feminist whore or someone obsessed with the material world then you will not escape. If you live like a frugal monkcel who keeps to himself, does not harm others, is morally righteous and avoids suffering then you will escape.

>>290927
What's wrong with extending sympathy/empathy to people who aren't like you? Would the average wizzies' life not be better off if normalfags extended some empathy? Not everything is a Jewish plot to erode the white race.

>>292762
you're askin the wrong people

the false god can be escaped. we can and will find our way out of this hell. it was not by choice that we ended up here, in these awful bodies surrounded by soulless trash, but it will be by choice that we (all true wizards) graduate onward to a better world.

I have created my own theo-philosophy: Inversionist Valentinianism.
Basically the demiurge created the material world, which is "bad" but the fact its bad makes it FUN because being a spiritual ascetic is lame and boring and being an ignorant\deluded non-se*ual hedonist is fun and wholesome.
only rule of I.V. church is no s*x and -thus but also and- no procreation. All other forms of fun, self-indulgence, and hedonism are acceptable and actively encouraged.

>>290289
I think it would be more productive on working out how to defeat the Farm rather than asking how you got here. Everybody suffers the memory wipe, most are imbeciles who don't know how to bypass it, and those that do will struggle to recall anything, myself included.

I can confirm committing suicide does not let you out of the Farm. I have tried more methods than the average person. The system literally would not let me die. It will permit non-life threatening injuries, but not death.

Having looked at other reports, there are individuals who claim to have just "miraculously" survived what should have been fatal accidents or outcomes, such as head on collisions or car crashes.

Obviously, not all people survive death, and my opinion are the ones who don't survive are NPCs. It could also be a form of quantum suicide, in that from your perspective others die, but from your own you don't.

It is clear that we don't "live" or "die" in here. So you cannot exit simply by dying. This begs the question of what will happen in old age. My thoughts are the death events are strictly scripted, I.E. there is one fixed event where you are guaranteed to die. Think 'Death Note'.

I'm not sure even dying is a true form of escape, because we've also got the bullshit of "reincarnation" as a whole possibility to deal with.

So my thoughts are we have to crash the system from within. But I don't know how to do that. It has safeguards, it will adapt the program to any sort of exploits or "glitches". There was an exploit involving death that I used, but as you can('t) see, it has patched that.

The system has a limited amount of resources. It has to re-use assets and people. It also seems to slack on the details in other areas (behaviours, conversation). I'm pretty sure this is a simulation.

I personally think we ought to overload the processing or memory somehow. But I don't quite know how.

>>290993
If you don't believe in this shit, why are you here?
Fuck off agent.

>>294786
Antinatalists used to joke that the ultimate goal of the movement in the long term should be a gigantic battleship that exploits wormholes for fast long distance travel, and goes from galaxy to galaxy wiping out every bacteria and atom of life to ensure nothing and nobody can be reborn.


But even this approach has a problem: The universe expands infinitely. Given enough billions of years, amino acids and carbon are bound to form somewhere and create life again. Natural selection will shape these primitive life forms for another few billion years.

And the problem starts from the beginning: Beings are born into existence against their will to fight over limited resources and survival. It never ends. Physical existence itself is the curse. This reality is a never-ending curse.

>>294798
It needs more hallucinogens

>>294801
I don't use them, but I do see why millions of people turn to them.

They're a cope for enduring this curse just like chocolates, hamburgers, chips, alcohol and whatever people ingest or inject in hopes of escaping into another plane of existence for a few minutes or hours.

>>294802
Hallucinogens are not like that at all. Opiates and sedatives are like that, but hallucinogens often force people to face their demons, in a potentially very dramatic and painful fashion.

>>294798
the earth is a closed system. outer space is not real. we are under water. even aristocles/plato understood water is the outermost element of this reality, and it was for that reason that he assigned the icosahedron to that element. our world is a concave hypertorus. no, im not insane. there are no galaxies. the sun is small and local. we are in the cosmic egg. for a thread that purportedly is discussing gnosticism, for you guys not to know that "occultists", that is, platonic mystics, are bound by the concept of pseudos gennaion (noble falsehood, noble lie) and that accordingly they deceive the goyish masses in everything they do (not only in politics, wars, but also "higher level" science) is really just laughable. outer space, big bang, ball planets, asteroids, gravity, quantum mechanics, string theory, set theory, evolution, the earth as a sphere moving around the sun – all these beliefs have clear antecedents in pythagorean philosophy wherefrom these propagandists have drawn their deceptions. watch the movie "sunshine" from the year 2007. this film is potent masonic outer-space propaganda. you'll notice when the crazy psychologist guy is discussing the intensity of the sun's light at around 04:54 (a little before the 5th minutes of the film), not only is the pilot making a masonic M gesture with his left hand so as to gird and countenance his fellow's thoughts, but you as the viewer are being subtly clued into their system of light worship.

here's a link, wizzies (if you're interested): https://ww4.123moviesfree.net/movie/sunshine-6695/

>>294815
A flat ring within a larger bulged-out doughnut (thus a hypertorus), that would resemble a sphere from the outside perspective of the Maker (god, or the demiurge, if you're a gnostic). We are indeed on the inside of the earth, between two bodies of water. I think the original image of Zoroaster holding a ring encodes our reality, and that this symbolism was used in the Sonic the Hedgehog games, which are a Japanese interpretation of Zoroastrianism (the masonic pointed finger gesture, the ring motif, the wings of the soul ascending out of demiurgic false reality, etc.) Even the name of the world wherein Sonic lives (Mobius) is an occultic acknowledgment of the Mobius strip, that being a type of infinite recycling loop. And of course Sonic itself is just a shortening of Masonic, just as when we meet Ma'Sonic in the Egyptian episode of the cartoon. The judeo-masonic rulers of our world are clever bullies. We may behold them operating pursuant to erasmus' written rede : "non expedit prodere omnem veritatem vulgo" it is not profitable to state every truth to the rabble. But we, wizards of true blue, requite back at them the full weight of their deceit with equipollent assertions of truth. Also, wizards, I bid ye look upon the ancient initiatory structure of the Mithraists, called by the Romans a "mithraeum", that being a cave-like temple of Mithra. I think this building was built in such a way so as to convey to the initiates that we are in the illusory cave right now, and that the true god resides locally outside of this world, whose position can only be "intellectually" made sense of through psychogenic drug use.

All true souls make it out. We have earned our rest.

“101 ἡ ἰσχὺς τοῦ σώματός σου μὴ γινέσθω τῆς ψυχῆς ἀσθένεια”

Let not the strength of the body be made the weakness of the soul.

“57 λόγῳ ἡγεμόνι ἐν παντὶ χρώμενος οὐχ ἁμαρτήσεις.”

Having used reason as a general (hegemon) thou shalt not sin.

Ὅτι, ἦ δ' ὅς, τὸ τὰ ὀφειλόμενα ἑκάστωι ἀποδιδόναι δίκαιόν ἐστι· τοῦτο λέγων δοκεῖ ἔμοιγε καλῶς λέγειν.” -plato

That, he said, the giving back to each of owed things is just. Saying this he seemeth to me to speak well.

I wonder if plato made it out?? Maybe he did. If the giving back of what is owed to each is just, we wizards will be remunerated with fullest rest.

>>295745
I don't think the point is that sufferers will be rewarded. I think the point is that you should return the effort and good that you experience. Look around you - even if you find yourself in a turd world, that's still better than living in the wilderness, exposed to the elements and predators. All the best places to live in the world also had their moments of being a medieval shithole, and their current state is all thanks to humans and their will. Don't you think it's only right to join that cause - building a better world?

>>290607
this is what i've come to believe as well. also, that consciousness is not something of which there can be a multiplicity, but is that in which all multiplicity is, or alternatively, is multiplicity itself, i.e., solipsism. so it would then make sense to think that it takes turns experiencing the life of every being.

since these insights and knowledge into consciousness lead to nothing good and only heighten the horror of existence, the less enlightened one is, the better, "he who increases knowledge, increases suffering", etc.

>>290607
I agree with your thoughts. Though struggle is not the word i'd use. It is the opposite actually. Even you mention it by 'not talking to apparitions and staying in the dark'. To become void, you need to let go of everything. You need to become a void so to speak, formless. As long as you struggle, resist, it just won't end.

>>295141
it's brainwashing.

>>295745
why are you so sure there is a soul?