/dep/ - Depression

>>295420
>c) There is no overseer of the universe ensuring moral order (as evidenced by events like the japanese experiments during ww2).
there is far worse thing that this look at the guy who 9 pups one bi-tch that shit ten times worse

>>295420
Quality thread desu

shit nobody cares about

>>295432
go back to the sharty

>>295437
is posting soyjaks allowed here doe? You would be the smug computer jakk or seething transoid activist o algo

fact that consciousness exist doesn't terrify me on its own but the fact that we have consciousness and have no freewill is terrifying. we can contemplate, sense and experience all the things that are happening and bound to happen to us and we are already hardwired to react them a certain way. at any rate we are not even in control of our thoughts because our biological desires and instincts affluence that also.

so it's as if we are presented a movie directed by god but even knowing this you yield to the built in delusion mechanism that you are in control. this is something mysterious to me and makes me wonder whether I was really chosen as it is mentioned in the holy books to burn in hell because I cannot bring myself to believe holy things.

>>295441
Wizards hate soyjaks

>>295420
I have no mouth and i must scream

>>295445
is that the game with robot everyone wants to fuck or fix

so reincarnation, but it helps to believe that you have free will to use your body to improve the world around you
that would explain how life for humans has generally been getting better, and i mean thousands of years

The idea that there are infinite versions of me and they're all just as fucking gay and retarded is really scary. Of course there are also infinite versions of me that aren't gay and annoying but they're not actually me now are they? Only the ones exactly the same as me are actually me. So really it's not any different than the commonly known reality which is that you only live once, but somehow the thought is unsettling nonetheless. Like you're trapped in amber wriggling throughout space time coming in and out of existence with eons in between. Who knows how many times the universe would have to expand and collapse for me to be reborn. The buddhist interpretation is almost more comforting, the idea that you can become anything and that what you become next will be determined by karma but like most religion it's just comforting nonsense without any basis for it.

>>295452
you will never know
maybe it a good thing
life without mysteries would be boring lol

>>295420
The idea of reincarnation is horrifying to me. The concept that, for instance, my 'soul' (place holder for consciousness) could, after my death be suddenly in the body of a succubus in the slums of India drives deep fear into my soul. Why do most people wish to live forever?

>>295420
Whenever I'm not distracting myself, thinking about consciousness just breaks my mind. I have mixed feelings about value

>>295467
I feel you, the thought that I'm trapped in this existence forever with no way out gives me panic attacks.

just stop thinking about it

>>295465
>why do most people wish to live forever
Because they haven't given enough thought to what it means to live forever, they're blinded by the fleeting pleasures of the flesh.

>>295471
death is a scary thing

>>295465
Reincarnation is roguelite
if you get a bad start just killyourself

>>295473
Death is fake and gay.

>>295444
Is it bcs they are boomers or bcs they think soyteens are normalfags?

>>295486
Stop typing in this pidgin Instagram baboon way

>>295486
wizard is full of millenials
also soyjak party is pretty the new 4chan it spreading it cancerous culture everywhere

>>295488
I see so its irrational boomer faggotry

>>295486
Because it's an ugly, cancerous, and repetitive (((meme))).

>>295420
I enjoyed reading this thread thanks for posting I agree with you

>>295490
so are gacha games

This is something that I think about every day and it drives me crazy:

The way I see it consciousness is like the graphical user interface of a computer. At its core it's all electric signals and moving around numbers so the GUI exists to make using a computer faster and user friendly. Consciousness lets us create a model of the world and ourselves to make better decisions. There is nothing inherently good or bad about the feeling of pleasure and pain but we can identify these sensations and they lead to seeking or avoidant behaviour. Thanks to consciousness you can endure pain when you know it's necessary like during a medical procedure. Enduring it is hard though which leads to suffering but it has to be hard because if you could ignore pain easily it would fail from protecting you. But our biological bodies aren't perfect so you can feel pain when you are not in danger.

So I kinda observe myself from 3rd person like a scientist observes a rat in maze. When I think about everything long enough everything seems to make sense and have a clear cause.

Now what drives me crazy is that I am stuck being me. All these people with interesting lives who experienced great things and created great things: I will never know what it's like. I can imagine it but imagination doesn't always match reality. Even if there was a "soul", a way to detach consciousness from body and memory, without memory I would not feel the pleasure of getting to experience a better life. Also I imagine the feelings of the people I envy are relative to their own life experience. Being born a millionaire might sound like paradise to me but to them it might feel normal. Same way as I am not jumping from joy from having shelter, food and safety when people in the 3rd world dream about it.

But following my thoughts on consciousness just being a tool I have no reason to envy anyone. What I imagine to be an amazing life is simply their body reacting to the stimuli they face.

>>295442
>so it's as if we are presented a movie directed by god

That's how I feel except I don't believe in god. I regret my past but then I realize I had no control over what thoughts appear in my head.

>this is something mysterious to me and makes me wonder whether I was really chosen as it is mentioned in the holy books to burn in hell because I cannot bring myself to believe holy things.

With no free will it doesn't make sense to me to punish people to some eternal suffering. In real life (ideally) prison exists as a deterrent, to shield dangerous individuals from society and hopefully to rehabilitate them. No one actually chooses to be evil it's ignorance or their brain wiring is messed up making them feel good doing bad things. Except when it's money and crime is seen as a shortcut to work and prison a calculated risk. That's why I have a hard time believing in religion even though I can see the advantages like enduring suffering thinking your life after this life will be worth it.

But if something outside of life observing us exists I think worst case we are simply entertainement and best case an experiment to see how life evolves and how we react to our environment and the interactions between other living beings. I want to be careful to think about something higher than that because that could simply be ego.

>>295452
>The idea that there are infinite versions of me and they're all just as fucking gay and retarded is really scary.

I thought about this after watching a movie about different timelines and this depresses me. Normal people might think about how their life turned out if instead of studying medicine they went to art school instead but I am characterized by being a lazy fuck so I worry that I am destined to do nothing and in every future I just do nothing.

DISCLAIMER: I am aware that I am not well read and only average IQ. There exist logical fallacies that I may be making without realizing it. It's possible to write coherent posts that don't actually say anything. I feel like I might be making some error by trying to step outside and observe myself when that's impossible as the observer is still influenced by biological things. Saying something like "pain is just a signal" might be meaningless since it won't actually make me ignore it. >The idea that there are infinite versions of me and they're all just as fucking gay and retarded is really scary.

>>295493
So that's the funny think about self-awareness. I can see how I am just a pawn in the game of evolution but the question is: now what? Can any results be made from this conclusion? Life is not an anime where I can "rise above" it all or train to battle god in an epic fight. At the end of the day I am still a slave to pleasure and pain. So all my energy should be spent on improving my life rather than existential thoughts.

>>295493
>But if something outside of life observing us exists I think worst case we are simply entertainement and best case an experiment to see how life evolves and how we react to our environment and the interactions between other living beings.
Could also be something like a proving ground of souls. Free will is something that you can exercise and strengthen to have more control over your life. You can also let go and succumb to the flow of life, but your free will will atrophy and you will become more of an NPC. If there is an entity that observes us, it might have interest in individuals who overcome the shackles of physiology and decide their fate despite their body seeking pleasure and avoiding pain and effort.
Anyway, I don't believe free will is an illusion, but the modern world does seem to discourage spiritual development. All that matters is money, grind, hustle, athletic body and getting laid, if you catch my drift. Spirituality is almost a taboo nowadays, and I mean actual spirituality, not bullshit meditation for trendy office workers. Mentioning the idea of true love that surpasses the physical boundaries gets met with ridicule, and if your reaction to the words "true love" is cringe, you might have been conditioned to react that way.

>>295492
1. 99% of people posting gacha succubi don't care about the "game"
2. Gacha succubi are neither ugly, cancerous, nor repetitive. The latter two could only apply to the "games" themselves to an extent

>>295498
>1. 99% of people posting gacha succubi don't care about the "game"
they are still annoying cunts
>2. Gacha succubi are neither ugly, cancerous, nor repetitive. The latter two could only apply to the "games" themselves to an extent
Most gacha succubi are generic as fuck and boring

>>295489
Boomers Millenials Gen Z Gen Alpha are all cancerous

>>295508
also soyjaks and unfunny but so are the le cunny memes that shit spam

>>295505
>>295509
You just have a small amygdala, bubby.

>>295510
>You just have a small amygdala, bubby.
no you just have shit taste and eat up slop
also reposting 4chan greentexts does not make you smart

>>295511
>no you just have shit taste and eat up slop
What is this supposed to mean in the context of cute 2d succubus pictures? You sound like a 3DPD roastie worshiper and/or homosexual.

>>295512
>What is this supposed to mean in the context of cute 2d succubus pictures?
Most Anime and Manga are slop just because they are cute means jack shit

You sound like a 3DPD roastie worshiper and/or homosexual.
i do not worship roasties and i am not gay you should go back to 4chan a shit site made for you

>>295513
No one is talking about anime, manga, or gacha games, we're talking about just pictures shared on imageboards. You don't necessarily have to be a fan of those mediums to tolerate or like pictures on the internet originating from them.

>>295514
>No one is talking about anime, manga, or gacha games, we're talking about just pictures shared on imageboards. You don't necessarily have to be a fan of those mediums to tolerate or like pictures on the internet originating from them.
Yes but most people who use anime reaction images are faggots

>>295518
i think the argument has gone for enough

I can't stop thinking about this and it gives me the worst panic attacks. I'm actually considering some kind of self lobotomy.

>>295558
just forget about it

>History shows that most lives, up until now, have been filled with suffering—perhaps even more suffering than pleasure. People have constantly struggled with survival, worrying about their next meal, staying alive, or keeping warm.
And life has generally been getting better for humans. I believe that's because people have faith that they can build a better future. That's what keeps people going, and that ability to see beyond your own lifespan is what sets us apart from animals.

Awareness of the atrocities that happened, and are still happening even now can be overwhelming, and I think the right answer to this is to just let go. Stop caring about the rest of the world, and just focus on improving your own life. You cannot bear the burden of the world if you cannot take care of yourself.

>>295420
>History shows that most lives, up until now, have been filled with suffering—perhaps even more suffering than pleasure.
99.9% of the people who whine and cry all day about suffering are living lives 500x better than most of the people who have existed throughout history. Suffering is completely subjective. That's the entire basis of BDSM.

>>295601
>>295609
The absolute state of this board.
>just improvebrah
>your suffeirng is not even real when you are not being put in a torture device for at least 30 years of your life

>>295420
I have 2 solutions/copes which are not incompatible:
1. You have a chance of being reborn as a Jewish Illuminati billionaire or whatever who through whatever means (eg. infant blood transfusion, transhumanism, etc) has an extended life and it's pretty good with little suffering.
2. Gnosticism might be true and there is an evil god controlling the material world which humans will eventually defeat to end the cycle of rebirth and suffering.

>>295610
well, what do you want me to tell you? to kill yourself?

That's why mages do the suicide ritual. Burning yourself so you can tether yourself to your ego and deny the archons when you deathwalk. I think most of us go into the light to reincarnate because that intense feeling of bliss/love blinds you into the reality trap. You need PAIN to become aware. Suicides with conviction become free. It's one of the hardest things to do to give them middlefinger to creation. Easier would be to master lucid dreaming. So you know you are dead and those beings you meet are not your family, it's not jesus, it's not benevolent. Stay in the dark until you fade away. Anyways that's my take.

you could have been born in a reality where you feel unbearable pain every second of your life, like some sort of hell. instead you are born in a reality where pain exists in abundance but isn't always present.
that thought is more terrifying to me because since consciousness exists and can seemingly arise out of nowhere like you say, then there is the possibility that consciousness can arise in places so horrific it would make earth seem like a paradise in comparison.

>>295420
Very good post.