No.305753
I'm almost 40. growing up in the 90s I hung around with the neighborhood kids on the streets, just like those nostalgia slop memes. I was stuck in school hours a day with peers for 20 years. joined clubs, sports, after school activities. converted to catholicism, went to church. went to meetups. I must have had 100s of 1000s of interactions over my lifetime. but interactions is the strongest word I can use, as it never got any deeper than that.
its like there is nothing i can say or do, no combo of words, that can make another human being like me. its like sometimes i think im having a good conversation, back in schooldays or some organized event. But no one would ever want to spend 5 minutes casually hanging out with me in a unforced manner. I never got invited to a single event, except 1 2nd grade birthday party where all the boys in class got invited.
even on the internet, where im just text on a screen, and my looks and mannerisms can't screw me, i still never had an online friend.
idk what i do so wrong. as a boy i was into action figures, heroes, toys, like the most normie boys stuff. yeah my interests got weirder and more esoteric as an adult. but the fact that HOI4 is one of the top games on steam shows its not that aspie.
it just seems to happen so naturally for everyone else in the world. even other weirdo nerds play DnD together. like just having 1 male friend is as impossible for me as getting a gf is for a crab.
No.305755
>it just seems to happen so naturally for everyone else in the world.
I don't agree with this. I have had many of the same problems you have had. And even many of the same thoughts. I recall a distinct sense of "difference" as a child growing up, a sense that divorced me from the casual society of others and to some degree still does.
>its like there is nothing i can say or do, no combo of words, that can make another human being like me.
There is no way you can know this. Perhaps you have been liked or even esteemed by others at some times but were not aware of it. And even so, I would argue that you shouldn't suffer yourself to be absorbed by an appetite of social validation; there can be no wisdom in this way of thinking (weakly aspiring after strangers' approval of who you are as an individual). If you were really certain in your sense of self, you would reason the disaffiliation of others from yourself is a symptom of their problems and not your own.
>But no one would ever want to spend 5 minutes casually hanging out with me in a unforced manner. I never got invited to a single event, except 1 2nd grade birthday party where all the boys in class got invited.
Brute normal-brained humans are 98% of the population and they have some sort of shared instinctual sense that reflexively spots and pushes away well-meaning souls dissimilar to themselves.
>even on the internet, where im just text on a screen, and my looks and mannerisms can't screw me, i still never had an online friend.
We are all friends here, truly and sincerely.
No.305764
I'm more shocked at the amount of normalfags who don't know how to handle a conversation and just bloviate at me in a stream of consciousness, give me no time to input, and just pontificate endlessly. It's literally like 10% of people I come across don't know how to talk properly.