No.305955
Its hard being bad at everything, even the things you do for yourself
Whatever I touch usually ends up ruined
Its very hard on me because I allready expect to fail at whatever I try nowadays
Maybe bad luck is real, but whatever I lay my hands on usually ends up more damaged then fixed
Id like to say electronics are a hobby, but i have destroyed more then I repaired
I have no talents no ability to put any Idea I have in my mind into reality
It doesnt matter if I prepare, if I practice
My fingers dont do what I want them to
Something unexpected happens
I couldnt even fix a carburator on my bike
And I couldnt get the replacement to work either
There are very few times I have tried something and got positive results
I have been fired from every job i have ever gotten quickly
I have been learning japanese for 3 years now and I have seen other people become fluid but despite the time I poured in I still suck
Its very hard to explain to other people, they will say "you have to try more or try something different"
But I am trying and failing
Its not that im just seeing the negatives, when I actually succeed at something it makes me very happy but its a rare feeling for me
I try things, even follow tutorials and it never turns out well for me
I have ruined many things I love by trying to fix an issue and breaking them irrepairably
I just want a bit of sucess in what I do
Its one failure after another
The last thing I sucessfully fixed was the kickstart on a scooter and then it died a few days later
I tried desperately and for weeks to repair it, and failed
I bought another used scooter it failed on me again and again I tried for weeks to fix it and totally failed despite doing everything "right"
I have a monitor I really care about, it was having some issues so I decided to replace the capacitors, I ended up stripping solder pads and despite working slow and carefully im not sure ill ever get it back together
I tried sanding some glass, and despite using the same polish and tools as someone else who I know suceeded, I ended up scratching it more and more
at my job, despite doing something hundreds of times, youd think id get it eventually, but I still make mistakes and destroy it even when im careful so i dont work anymore
Everything takes practice and failure is expected sure
But for me it seems no matter how much time I pour into something, it just doesnt work out
Socially I failed too offcourse I dont have any friends
Most people can name atleast one thing they are really good at, they are suceeding at, even if you are a friendless loser there is usually something
Do you know how frustrating it feels when you have been trying something for a long time, someone else starts and they eclipse you in short order?
It feels terrible
No.305957
>>305955
>Do you know how frustrating it feels when you have been trying something for a long time, someone else starts and they eclipse you in short order?It feels terrible
I know exactly how you feel and I want to tell you, I was in the same spot but I learned quickly. I realized, very early on, that I can only succeed if I fix things on my own terms. Something in my mind just refuses to cooperate if I adhere to a 'correct standard' set by others, I must have total control over the medium I'm working with and I must be the one to set the architectural rules. Because when you're that independent and you play by other people's game, you'll always lose for being outside of it.