No.293808
>>293806I'm 27 yo apprentice.
>not learning in school>no dream job>playing video games every time I come home>no hobbies beside video games>doing homework 1/2 of the time>not doing sport>fapping all the timeleading to me being a fumbass neet who had schizophrznia and fucked up my 20-27 years
No.293810
>How old are you?
30
What brought you to where you are?
An old pair of blue leather shoes
>What prevents you from changing?
My arms are too sore from working out to get my shirt over my head
No.293822
>>293808Everything you said is understandable, but I have a hard time understanding people like you, I know everyone needs a job, but have you ever considered that letting another man exploit you isn't really a good path?
No.293823
>>293810Why not exercise your legs? They are the best part of the body, the most useful, and the most aesthetic. Imagine that someone bothers you, with a good kick you can kill them, while to give a good punch you need decades of training.
No.293824
>>293820Sudaca tier. Brazilian, Indian, Argentinian or Venezuelan?
No.293834
>>293822I can't stay a NEET all my life
No.293838
>>293823You still have to train your kicks. Effective punches are generated by your lower body.
No.293839
>>293833
With good legs you can walk many kilometers, hit hard, and if you exercise your back more it will help carry heavy things.
No.293840
>>293838It's true, but with a steel-toed boot, and with a basic technique you can break anyone's legs.
No.293844
>>293806>How old are you?37
>What brought you to where you are?tfw no gf for too long
>What prevents you from changing?I am in the process of change, but the major thing was not being grounded in reality. So many false beliefs that fueled my depression and anxiety.
No.293845
>>293844>but the major thing was not being grounded in realityVery sure. The real change is mental, thinking that you can achieve it, that you are strong and capable.
>no gf for too longRejection can be painful, but you have to understand that your life cannot revolve around a succubus. It can be hard not to have anyone to love you, so you have to learn to love yourself, and focus on truly important things.
No.293862
>>29380620. Vidya basically. I never figured instinctvely how to fit among the crowd as I spent a good portion of my childhood within four walls. Not having the desire to become a normalfaggot, lacking the will to improve myself, hatred towards people (normoids) from my hometown (at least). Plus 3/4 of my family members have/had depression and/or OCD that prevents me from thinking in good stuff instead of past situations where I was wronged. I don't think I'm eternally doomed though, this shit will pass. I just wish to have grown smarter when I come up in life. Not obsesivelly think in how to get a job, talk to a succubus or do this or what other people think of me.
No.293863
>>293862Oh and high school was bullshit-tier. Getting permanently rejected by succubus whilst my colleagues didn't. Getting beat by niggers. Having no friends. Thank God it's over.
No.293864
>>293863>Getting beat by niggers.can you explain? why did they beat you?
No.293868
>>293864I brought this one upon myself. I did some things in order to impress the bigger boys – some were meant to harm the nigger in particular, others just to make fun of me and caught their attention, one day he went mad on me and gave me a beating in front of everyone. I looked out for payback and gave me another, thing viralized all over my hometown, it was filmed. Moral is, I should of had more self steem and not act as the sad clown at the time. I was stupid.
No.293869
>>293862Dealing with family members like that must be hard, I feel sorry for you anon. But I think that hatred towards others is due to the rejection of bad people around you, and although the world is full of bad people, there are still good people, but you still always have to show yourself as you are, or at least the best part of you. But I think that hatred towards others is due to the rejection of bad people around you, and although the world is full of bad people, there are still good people, but you still always have to show yourself as you are.
No.293887
>>293806>How old are you? 31.
>What brought you to where you are? Lack of self-discipline.
>What prevents you from changing?Lack of self-discipline.
No.293893
>>293887>Lack of self-discipline.same
No.293895
>>293886I thought Australia was a first world country, how can there be poor people and crime. Not to offend or sound racist, but are you a negro?
No.293897
>>293895NTA
You think poverty and crime can't exist in "first world" countries?
No.293899
>>293897A poor person from the first world is an upper middle class person from the third
No.293914
>>293899It doesn't work that way. When a loaf of bread and some cold cuts cost $12 while your monthly food allowance is $300, nobody gives a shit you could buy a house in Burundi for $300.
Australia is one of the most expensive places to live on the entire planet. Being a poor aussie is utter hell. Temperature-wise as well.
No.293917
>>293914Poverty in Australia is very hard, and I am very sorry for not being empathetic with your situation, but a poor person in a Latin country puts his children in the garbage can and they eat straight from the garbage.
No.293937
>How old are you?
27
>What brought you to where you are?
My official guesses are that I was neglected by my parents, they just didn't really engage with me a lot and I didn't learn much.
Then my cousin who was my only non-school "friend" who hung out with me a lot, but I think mostly just to hurt me and take my things from ages like 6-10.
I tried to avoid him a lot but my family didn't really let me since he was family, also it was most of the socializing I got with anyone around my age.
It's the closest thing I had to friendship in my life but I feel like the relationship made me very secretive because he was very judgemental of me and the things I liked.
Then I was fat the entirety of my school experience and just very under socialized, students didn't really bully me but I don't think they wanted to be my friend and I didn't engage.
>What prevents you from changing?
I try to take care of myself, if you mean getting a job or socializing more I don't really feel a desire to.
By the time I hit my mid 20s I stopped caring about things like "changing".
No.293939
>How old are you?
32
>What brought you to where you are?
Controlling (arguably abusive) father, poor relationship with family in general, underdeveloped social skills, and self-loathing.
>What prevents you from changing?
Deeply-engrained pessimism, lack of self-discipline, lack of confidence, cowardice, and more self-loathing.
No.293942
I am a 26 year old apprentice and I feel like all of my problems stem from having a bad gut biome which has left me with near permanent bloating. I have attempted to fast for many years to get my body back to a suitable state but I lack the willpower. If I didn't have this stupid gut, I would not be who I am.
No.293953
>>293942Didn't you think about learning to cook? Today's food is full of crap, you know what is good for you and what is not, so if you make a diet that suits you, you will be able to improve a large part of your life.
>>293939Why do you hate yourself?
No.293961
>>293953>Why do you hate yourself?I guess the root of it is that I know I'm more intelligent than the majority of normalfags, so logically I should be more successful and accomplished than the average person. In reality, however, I'm pitifully unsuccessful in life. I have few real accomplishments or skills, practically no money, I still live with my parents into my 30s, and I move from dead-end job to dead-end job. Granted, I am working to get certified in web development so I can try to make a career out of that, but my utter lack of confidence in myself makes it difficult to commit to it fully. I constantly doubt myself, which often leads to me giving up so I don't have to face the sharp gut-punch of dismal failure, and I end up hating myself more for it. I basically have nothing worthwhile to show for my 32 years of life on this planet, I feel like I've wasted all of my opportunities and potential, and it leaves me with a deep sense of shame and guilt.
No.294788
>>293806>What brought you to where you are?The opportunities required for me to succeed in any of my goals involve variables all controlled by others.
I do not have any meaningful control over these others, so I do not succeed.
>What prevents you from changing?Genetics, physical shape, the upper ceiling limits on human nature, the lack of manoeuvring room with the resources I don't have that prevent me from achieving the things I can't do.
I could pretend that I would use my time productively, but to do what? What could I possibly do productively in a crippled state that couldn't already be done better by someone else?
I can't even die. I'm not even allowed to choose that. I have no free will, no freedom of choice, nothing I can say or do will improve my situation. I am in a prison, of sorts, and it seems I have finally found my fellow inmates who are all experiencing much the same thing.
No.294800
>>293961start mindfulness meditation and stop overthinking.
im in the same boat 3 years ago (25 yo rn) overthinking is just a fucking stress spammer.
mindfulness meditation lets you be aware of your thoughs and you can stop that nonsense overthinking and do the job.
No.294803
>>293806>how old are you?32
>what brought you here?reading about various alt-chans on /qa/ around 2016
>what prevents you from changing-unstable moods
-psychosis, depression and mania sometimes all at once
-autism
-extreme social anxiety
-extreme internet addiction
-crippling low self-esteem
i have a stem degree and have the mental capacity to be employed but i am also a mental basket case. mania, psychosis and depression and the same time is fucked. imagine being hyped as fuck to hang yourself.
No.294808
>>293806>How old are you?Young enough that people would say that my life is just beginning.
>What brought you to where you are?I can't get off imageboards, and this one has a more relatable userbase.
>What prevents you from changing?I can't be socially active because of autism, and I have little interest in trying to achieve financial success because it's pointless and there's nothing to spend money on. I think casual sex is pointless and degenerate, and the idea of getting into a relationship (with a good ending) is not realistic because of autism and because most 3DPD succubi are shit. I wish I could indefinitely stay a NEET, but that would bring some hardships so I may look into college and/or working, however I predict that I may have a hard time or possibly fail at those.
No.294809
>How old are you?
37
>What brought you to where you are?
Trauma from culture and family memebrs leaving me to fend from myself. Also trauma by so many poeple calling me ugly when I was a teenager.
>What prevents you from changing?
I am changing now, but looking back it was quite a few things. Not having my own space to relax, ignoring my trauma, and participating in crab in a bucket communities were teh major things. A gf would've fixed my problems, but looking back I had plenty of opportunities for that but my damaged brain prevented that from happening. My experiences and natural temperament put me in a state where the only way to heal was with time, unfortunately.
No.294825
>>293942You sure it's just bloating and not inflammation? Have you tried xifaxan which usually is used for SIBO for example.
No.294831
>How old are you?
28.
>What brought you to where you are?
genetics.
>What prevents you from changing?
genetics.
No.294842
28, despair,health issues
I don't even want to fix my life anymore, or maybe I do… it's just too painful what I have been through. I want it all to just end.
No.294855
> 31 yrs
> Various mental issues and being kind of uggo, seeing no point in engaging with society beyond what I actually have to, and lucky enough to be in circumstances where I can comfortably NEET for the time being
> Apathy. basically, am convinced that humanity is probably just straight up fucked, disillusioned with the whole business regardless
No.294886
>>293942Sometimes is gluten, some other times is something we do not even guess.
No.294888
20
genetic defect (facial disfigurement)
mental illness
No.294890
>26
>bad genetics (autism and bipolar) and bad environment
>total despair
No.294902
>>294800It's funny because I used to meditate a bit, so I know it helps, but now I keep telling myself that I need to start again yet I never do.
No.294908
>>293806>How old are you? 22
>What brought you to where you are?lack of self-discipline and most likely mental issues
>What prevents you from changing?See above. Also no meaning, purpose, goal or reason to keep going. Just going through life passively without a plan
No.295281
>>294908Hey, I was you 4 years ago and in many ways still am.
But it's up to you, it really is.
Don't try to be happy, only try to be less miserable.
Just a single thing, a small habit.
From there you can do the next little thing.
Eventually you will be able to be again without so much burden and when you set your sights on a personal goal again things can get better.
They will be very bad inbetween.
These were my past 4 years
It was miserable but it's less miserable now.
No.295282
>>295281I dare say that right now I am feeling a little contented, maybe even slightly happy in spite of having been quite miserable earlier today.
No.295283
-I forgot.
-Fodder for being condescended on.
-Stuff like lolcow's flaming immaturity. :)
No.295287
I'm 29. I had an entitled teenage and childhood era where drugged weed was passed and my wit unrivalled. I screwed up and received brain surgery rendering me retarded. I became an addict, that led me to a dark place I never wanna go back to. I was always onto benzodiazepines and alcohol to be numb to the dismay of the president, because I would abuse that gave way to 5150 from "alcohol and drug fuelled psychosis". His will grew grim and my reality scary. I fought euthanasia proceedings. I won't work, people want me dead, the withdrawal was constant, I was always drunk or high and out of money so I can be hated even more, I found it difficult to be crab, my heat in full swing I cut with a saw unable to see light at the end of the tunnel. I was later sentenced to 8months corrections ward and given a leucotomy to pose no further to others after shooting an attacker. I can't grow because of the cortex removals. I am bound by a lack of ability from damage, and I assure you my abilities are slowly taken via force.
No.295288
>How old?
26 yo apprentice. Have been browsing here since I was about 20 or so. Time really flies.
>What brought you here?
A mixture of being depressed and anxious to the point where I convince myself that I will die soon. I've had this happen multiple times during my youth and it instilled within me a sense that any and all aspirations that society tried to drill into me are pointless and that at the end of the day, I just want to stay home and read books or go for long walks in the forest. I wasn't able to make the jump socially from grade to middle school and so while I wasn't bullied luckily I still became a loner.
>What prevents you from changing?
Lack of self discipline or rather the little things that I manage to do won't have any radical effects in the short or even medium term. I will not finish my college degree before 28 for example. No amount of studying will change that now.
No.295481
>How old are you?
25 as of 2 hours ago local time.
>What brought you to where you are?
I was either born without that innate human social drive, or had it atrophy and it's remains be devoured by the void from spending all of my free time inside my room since I was 5 or 6 years old. All started with me teaching myself to read, and from then on it's all a blur of books, video games, internet, fantasizing. Everything else was a distraction from me locking myself in my room and doing what I want to do. Now some 2 decades later I am completely disinterested in human interaction. I don't dislike it, I am not incapable of it, but I will never initiate unless I have a concrete reason and end interaction once that reason has disappeared. It doesn't hurt or bother me either, there's only total apathy. Like an invisible bubble of seclusion and silence that wraps around me and follows me everywhere at all times. A bubble of nothingness. It is little wonder the only work a creature like me can find is low-tier stuff like warehousing and construction.
>What prevents you from changing?
Because whenever I do anything other engage with my hobbies in my room by my lonesome, all I ever feel is apathy. Whether I am sitting amidst a dozen rowdy construction workers at lunch having the time of their lives talking about something or other, or cleaning windows 10 stories above ground level with no safety and guaranteed death one step away, or lying in a nearby forest amid tree roots and leaves in the middle of the night naked save for a cigarette in my mouth, I always feel absolutely nothing. It doesn't bother me, I have neither anything pulling nor anything pushing me towards change, and I have no reason to carry myself towards that either - so I just keep on keeping on until the end.
No.295503
>>295481Happy birthday fellow schizoid.
No.296090
>How old are you?
24
>What brought you to where you are?
my mental illness and a depressing childhood envionment, and parental neglect
>What prevents you from changing?
my lack of energy, motivation and ability, and my sensitivity to negative stimuli
No.296127
>>295481tbh I'm really fascinated by the schizoid personality. I still get confused about whether you guys are better than everybody for lacking emotions and just accept everything…
No.296128
>>293806>How old are you?29
>What brought you to where you are?Some degree of autism probably. I first realised that I'm "different" around the age of 4 or 5. Other kids seemed to be able to intuitively socialise with others, but I was and still am really confused about social interactions. I just don't know what to say, nothing comes to my mind during conversations. So I became a social outcast.
Also apathy, this post
>>295481 is an excellent description of it. I also learnt to read very early in my life, and have been escaping into fantasy since then. Maybe I dreamed too big and had unrealistic expectations about life, maybe a child is not supposed to absorb so much fiction at an age where everything has such a big influence on your development.
>What prevents you from changing?I guess the belief that real life sucks. Working 12 hours a day, if you include the self-improvement like working out and grinding competences, just to have a little pleasure maybe once a week seems like a really bad deal. I'd rather get by doing the necessary minimum and resting the rest of the time.
No.296157
>>296127Paranoid about whether they are in the same boat. People say you could not speak to autists for years and they would be in the same boat, but schizoids, I don't know.
No.296162
>>296157what do you mean by being in the same boat?
No.296172
>how old are you?
31
>What brought you to where you are?
A combination of being born in a world where no one understood autism, constant heartbreak, dejection by peers and in some cases parents.
>What prevents you from changing?
The fear of being hurt…again.
No.296176
>>296162The ability to remain within the same contexts in which you related to them last time. Schizoids are unrelatable daydreamers / mystics. Compare Kaczynski vs. Chris Chan, a lolcow. The majority of them are married, there is also a huge demographic of low iq people incapable of understanding the misery of having a low-wage job + a family + children so that they can feel it. He may devolve into a normie
No.296443
>>293806>How old are you?39.
>What brought you to where you are?Autism, obesity, introversion, hot-blooded emotional state.
>What prevents you from changing?I've changed a lot over the decades, but the more things change the more they stay the same.
No.296650
>>29380639 year old KV.
>shaken as a baby by my father, damaging my brain for life>continued to be violently abused by my father neglected by mother>violently bullied in school for being fat and in the special education class for 12 years, I always got punished for standing up for myself but they never got so much as a slap on the wrist for starting shit>never so much as hold hands with a succubus throughout that time, didn't even try because I knew my place in the pecking order>only copes are video games, cartoons, and lots and lots of junk food>parents divorce and mom works two full-time jobs while occasionally bringing home prison filth to fuck>graduate high school>don't go into higher education>NEET for several years because I have no idea what to do or where to go>get first job>get fired a few months later for no apparent reason>continue to neet for another few years>continue the cycle of getting shit jobs for a few to several months and getting fired, usually on account of workplace bullying>discover /fit/, stop being fat, but then gain it all back because of the cycle of depression and binge-eating>repeat a few more times, losing about 100-200 lbs each time, then gaining it all back because the depression and the addiction to junk food always comes creeping back>grandmother dies, get $30,000 inheritence>best time of my life for a couple years pissing most of it down the drain on stupid shit like the $5000 computer I'm using to type this post, but also some good shit like my first car>get job that I stay with long enough to get better job>promoted to full-time position for the first time in my life>eventually move out for the first time; I'm over 30 at this point>wage-slave for about 5 years>become more and more burnt-out, more and more depressed and angry and feeling trapped and miserable thanks to perpetually "faking-it-til-I-make-it" as books like How To Win Friends taught, more than I had ever been>even though for about half this time I was relatively thin and even getting hit on by hot chicks for the first time in my life, but I'm too spergy to know what to do about it>have crush on chick at work for months and finally confess and am turned down, the only time in my life I actually tried to get with a succubus>one night I'm exercising and skinnier than I'd ever been but I'm still flabby from the loose skin from decades of being morbidly obese, I'm so weak from several months of -1000 calorie deficit and been plateaued on the weight loss for almost as much time, have a mental breakdown because I realize I'll never get /fit/ enough to finally feel comfortable enough in my own body to finally lose my virginity>all motivation to lift and diet gone>stop exercising and gain about 250 lbs, which has stayed to this very day>covid lockdowns>lose job>decide to go back to NEET life>years later diagnosed with diabetes (miraculous that it took this long)>still utterly and completely burnt-out and having completely given up on life and everything ever since that nervous breakdown, feel lonelier, more miserable, more disconnected and dissociated from the rest of the world, fatter and tired than even when I was working at that "good" job>today I have zero motivation to lift a finger except to play video games, watch cartoons, and shitpost on the Internet, just like when I was a teenager in the early 00's No.296653
>>296651I forgot to mention starting about a year ago I finally managed to get on neetbux. It's not much and I'm living with my father (we've mostly reconciled now, though I did have to blow up and beat the shit out of him once in order for his abuse to stop) so I don't have to sink a shit ton of said neetbux into rent/etc. So I guess things are outwardly better. But I'm still a 500-lb (I miss being under 250-lb very much) lonely and unloved virgin with no friends who feels little more but bitter and hateful towards both myself and the rest of the world.
No.296654
>>296653good job 👍 for the neetbux
what happened to your mother?
hope things will be better for you you deserve it
No.296655
>>296654>good job 👍 for the neetbuxThank you. Now if only I learned from my inheritance mistake and not piss it away on dumb shit like a $1000 Linux tablet. (Purism Librem11 if you're curious.)
>what happened to your mother?Died of lung cancer about ten years ago; don't smoke, kids!
>hope things will be better for you you deserve itThank you again.
No.296656
>>296655sorry for your loss, wizzie.
>Purism Librem 11do you know how to draw? can you draw something an oekaki?
No.296660
>>296658nta
i think its admirable to live with the least effort (guess why lol)
No.296664
>>296660>guess why lolbecause it's stressless maybe
No.296666
>>29380626
Prolonged self isolation and an inability to form connections with anyone beyond the acquaintance level. Naively believing that things would naturally improve as I matured through memes like gym and career. IRL I come across as stonefaced and never speak.
>What prevents you from changing? Feels like the only thing that would fix me is getting a new brain as nothing I've tried has been enough.
No.296672
>What prevents you from changing?The fact that you CAN'T change. That it's completely impossible, and all you do is shit everything up whenever you try.
I posted this elsewhere but I feel it belongs here, too:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DR5n2H6Jehg No.296781
>>296657unrelated but i love those succubi, cant believe im more than a decade older than them despite being like 4 years younger when i read the VN
No.296783
>>29380628
>University dropout due lack of motivation and money>No job, I'm a leech in my parents house.>Dont want keep living but cant comit to suicide eitherHow you find this place
>JewTuber I'm subscribe to made a video about this miserable place. Seems comfy so I came here to lurk time to time. No.296785
>>293806 (OP)
31
> What brought you here?I would say it snowballed from an early age. One thing led to the other, it is like a chain of events and various factors.
I still remember, that as a kid, the time where I was pretty "normal" and very "social" with other kids. Then something happened. But it's pretty complex and involves a lot of factors: parents, environment, etc
> What prevents you from changingI would say the extreme case of social anxiety (but it's gotten better over the years, or so I think and say to myself)
That's one of the things that I can't fix no matter how much I try. The exposure "therapy" thing did not help, it just doesn't work.
I can be employed and do the work so the autism is probably not that strong, but it still feels like a death sentance for employment. I have failed so many interviews.
Let alone the normies struggle. For artists, it's like a death sentence.
No.296791
31 Year Old.
>Autistic
>No social skills
>can't understand social cues to save my fucking life
>video games almost every chance I get
>Not athletic AT ALL
>Grew up from a single mother home
>Live in a sisterfucker town that doesn't understand autism
>can't move
It's a shitshow.
No.296794
>>296791>video games almost every chance I getyou list this like it's a bad thing. Plus, from my experience, normal (not wizards) folk play them constantly.
My brother is a super normie and practically plays them all day every day while having a remote job and a wife.
No.296813
Dead parent, emo attitude, bullying, no friendsish, school was hell particularly before high school, 32, changing is hard idk… Never good with routine or self discipline on certain things, ,….
No.296867
>>293806>How old are you? 21
What brought you to where you are?
I was here a couple of years ago but then I took the bluepill and dived headfirst into the normalfag lifestyle. It felt good for a while but it all felt wrong, I started realizing I didn't like the people around me, the life I was living, and the person I was becoming. This lifestyle has left my sense of self and self worth more scrambled than browsing imageboards and playing vidya ever did. I knew myself then, I had things I did and places I belonged to, now I don't really belong anywhere
>What prevents you from changing?Fear, lack of discipline, lack of self respect
No.296965
>How old are you?
38
>What brought you here?
I found the old wizardchan back in 2012 or so. Can't even really remember how I first found it. Maybe via tohnochan?
Either way, I've never been more than an infrequent visitor. But I always ended up coming back.
>What brought you to where you are?
Multiple different factors exacerbating eachother.
Ex-alcoholic mother who's also severely neurotic. Autism. Severe anxiety problems (which have never been taken seriously by anyone, not even when I was in therapy). Avoidance as a coping strategy (see all of the above). And all of that railroaded me into social isolation and depression.
I have tried to come out of my shell more than once. But the one time that really seemed to work, I burned myself out and then I got put on antidepressants. Even though the pills helped me recover, they did almost as much damage as the depression itself.
Nowadays I try to be more social because I have a tolerable job now (the pay is not great, but the hours, benefits and commute are good). But the more I try, the more that I see that aging autistic men aren't actually welcome anywhere.
>What prevents you from changing?
I did manage to change some things for the better. I was forced to stop being a NEET, but moving out into a decent-ish affordable apartment ended up giving me a lot more peace of mind than I thought it would.
OTOH, I fear that I'm just too damn old and autistic for meaningful change. I work with several autistic colleagues, male and female, and it has made me realize just how inescapable the hold of the 'tism really is. Put us all into a social event, and every single one of us defaults to the exact same awkward little autistic reflexes.
My instincts force me to look for romance with a succubus. But the autism makes me unsociable and awkward. Meanwhile, succubi are encouraged to dismiss men over the tiniest flaws, while ugly and awkward men are happily villified.
I honestly wish I could turn off these feelings. I have never asked for them, and I never wanted them. Love and sexuality have brought me nothing but misery, and they have made me worse off in every way.
No.296968
>>296965do you bound with your colle1gues?
No.297146
>>29380632, I am here because I can't find fulfillment in relationships, and when my brain lights up towards a succubus, turns out she has a myriad of unbearable mental illnesses, even the virgin ones. This is the black pill I will be ruminating through the new year and probably the rest of my life, because despite all the statistics on virgin succubi, they are unsafe individuals to be around. The light at the end of the tunnel was a lie, my worldview is shattered, there is something tightening within my chest at any given time, my eyes gets slightly watery from time to time, I am very, very sad. The temptation is to try to get in contact again, but three weeks without messages is enough of a sign that I have been ghosted, holding back just makes this sadness harder to deal with.
I just want a reason to feel genuine interest in people other than just freeing from loneliness, that is what prevents me from changing.
Desiring relationships is a curse. Being human is a curse.
(USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST) No.297149
>>297146Only one life. Stop being a pussy and call her. Stop living in fear. Accept humanity with its defects.
Things don't have to be perfect to be good.
No.297160
>>297149Isn't this like "eat shit because you cannot find any better"? But he is not even talking about a real need, just the degeneracy of male desire dominating his limbic system, his life.
At least he knows that he is cursed with that. He surely lives a life of "thirst" without ever experimenting real, active, healthy horniness… just because he got hardwired to some emotional flaw inside and now that is crossing his brain when even thinking on the opposite sex.
Reject females, reject cooming. Edging and gooning might help to regain the consciousness he needs on this issue. And I say this because I used to be like him long ago, until I started to hate it. Sex is nowadays a warzone to be dominated and the struggle starts inside.
>>297149All the weight is always put into men, no wonder succubi are so damn corrupted.
No.297162
>>297146 what is ban reason?
No.297163
>>297149>Only one life. Stop being a pussy and call her.wizchan 2025
No.297238
>>297162liking little children (has megumin picrel)
No.297239
>>293806>How old are you?22
>What brought you to where you are?Im only striving to maintain a status quo and nothing beyond. fucked up my studies even though Im still studying right now. Im not spending the time on things I should, currently Im obsessed with reading manga, light novels and lord of the rings. The last week was spent on learning hearts of iron 4 and other video games as well as watching trash on youtube. I have 0 friends but this is also kind of my fault since I couldve had at least two from school but I rejected them both. I remember myself sperging out once on my classmate friend 5 years ago who was constantly talking about stuff I dont care and since then I had no friends in school anymore.
>What prevents you from changing?Timidness in every social situation, I just want to get out everytime a stranger might be looking at me. Im addicted to spending my time on everything but mathematics and stuff related to my university. I am unemployable because I cant work physically with my slight disablity and have no skills to work on a computer with besides some programming knowledge but thats worthless. Im worthless.
No.297241
>>297239are you learning C.S?
I have some experience with C.S courses, basically if you are not willing to put maximum effort and practice coding for 10 hours each day OUTSIDE of your classes, then you are doomed, it's a skill based major, companies value your skills way more than your degree, when you apply for a job at google corpo, they will give you an algorithmic equation or ask you build a project for them to test your skills, I only suggest people who are willing to put all their free time into it to get into it.
No.297243
>>293806>How old are you? 42
>What brought you to where you are? Twisted perception of the world since forever. No one in my entourage can't read my way of thinking.
Childhood : The classic, constantly bullied, self image disorder, undiagnosed autism, beaten by both classmates and parents. But it was mostly deserved. Grew up poor didn't help.
Teenager : losing friends, social anxiety becomes worse, doing some misdemeanors, but somehow having good grades. Had a failed suicide attempt.
Adulthood : no friend at all but it is good as it is, KHV, the classic again. Balding at 25. Have a shitty, underpaid IT job. Never gone neet, but I'll probably rope myself if that happens. Anyway I still want to exit life but I have not enough resolve nor access to firearms.
>What prevents you from changing?No self-discipline, health decline beyond repair, unfixable body, short-temper. Living on autopilot for at least 25 years.
No.297247
>>297241Not the other guy but I'm in C.S. and where I live it's basically a requirement to get some sort of computer related office job (beyond a basic excel sheet filling job or whatever). Unless you have a degree or finished an apprenticeship in something related, you won't get the job in 98% of cases. But I agree that if you want to get into programming, you have to be excited about the process of programming itself cause most of the time you will be coding nonsense globohomo projects with no real value.
>>293806>age26yo apprentice
>why am I hereSocial rejection from middle school onward. Became convinced early on that humans are an ugly, evil species and we're stuck in a system where we do meaningless labour for most of our waking hours and get nothing out of it besides the privilege of continuing to work. Retreated into my room, started living on the computer. Got by in school but am struggling to finish my degree now. Relationship with parents is good, we live in a large house and I never have anyone over so I never had any reasons to move out or "make something" of myself.
>why won't I changeI am convinced that we will experience absolute ecological and following that economical and social collapse within our lifetimes. There is nothing out of life that I want that I don't already have. I am reasonably content with reading books, going on walks and such. I'm lucky as it is to live in my current circumstances. I have no hope, no positive outlook for the future and as such, zero motivation to change.
No.297251
>>297247>I am convinced that we will experience absolute ecological and following that economical and social collapse within our lifetimes.same
why bother working hard for your future, when everything points to disasters?
better to live for the day and enjoy life while it's enjoyable