>>311147Lost the 60 days streak the other day. Shitty month, got drunk three times last week, burned through my dopamine storage and the beast took over once again. Fortunately I learned not to blame myself too much.
>if it's from sheer raw willpowerThanks but it wasn't. Mostly I felt libidoless and whenever I had my libido, my anhedonia retreated and I didn't even want to goon. Gooning for me is a last resort. It's just the times are hard and I use it often, unfortunately. Or if the libido is so overwhelming it gives me brainfog of lust, a haze of pink rot, but it doesn't happen often at all.
>ike today you got off to 1 big titty anime succubus, each load and orgasm irreversibly brings you closer to horsecock elf futas whispering mommy dom ASMR in your earsThankfully I am mindful to what I goon too. I've been on the internet for enough time to know what kind of degenerate freaks gooners can devolve to. That is horryfing. I've been stuck at the same fetish for years with mild variations. Sometimes I get a craving for vanilla fantasies. It's rot anyway but it could be worse. I take relief in the fact I am not one of the ntr sissy goons and similiar creatures destroyed by this addiction.
>22 hours and I don't feel "tired" at all22 hours of a goon? Damn, that is a lot. Whenver I get flashes of libido, I can do 10-12 at best.
>at filling a holeBut the thing is, I have almost zero social connections. I have my relatives (not immediate) that is it. But there are days, sometimes even a week when I feel just alright, without this 'hole'. And there can be weeks when I feel wretched. Drinking more alcohol, lyrica, consuming porn whataever I can my hands on. It gets me the most - it's unstable fluctiation. It doesn't go away, 30, 60, 120 days of nofap. I read people feel that way for years. Then again most of those nofap stories are for retarded normaltrash who aren't trustworthy.
>I still remember the times I deleted my porn collection, first when I was a teen and it was 10gb, then 250gb, today it's 4tb.I used to keep a bit of a pornstash, a few collected images/gifs back in 2015 or so. But I can't, for me it's explosive - I relapse, goon for as long
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