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Anyone else absolutely HATE toddlers and children? My parents decided after 16 years of me being an only child (4 years ago) to have another one, and I genuinely think this ruined my life. We lived in a tiny apartment, so no sleep, no time to relax, not being able to study in peace, never enjoying myself. I was a bit messed up before but now I had no comfort zone whatsoever. Usually it was school which sucked and then home where I could sit in my room and listen to music, read, play vidya in peace. Now that was taken from me and I didn’t enjoy my life. All my energy was depleted because of sleeplessness.

And it’s not just me, my parents also have clearly been negatively affected. They used to never fight but after the kid it was constant arguing between them and me as well. Never saw them smile which they used to do, same with me. They are struggling financially despite them having decent jobs (dad is an engineer). We all got fat, I don’t know how but I theorize it’s that we just ate to feel good and make time pass faster, eating at this point was the only thing we could still somewhat enjoy.

And the icing on the cake is that the kid is even more retarded than me. He’s 4 years old now but can’t speak a single word of his mother tongue, and he’s totally addicted to YouTube, if you take away the phone he starts this unbelievably loud shrieking.

Anyways, I finally moved out and I’m kinda happy again despite no friends and still being a kissless virgin. I can enjoy my life again. But it kinda sucks having 4 important years of your life stolen from you (16-20) because of someone else’s decision. And it had caused some long term problems, like when I hear a toddler/child crying in public I want to beat the ever living shit out of it. And I gotta lose weight, although I have already managed to lose 10kg. The worst long term effect it has had is that I have this permanent fog in my brain. I genuinely think I have become a lot dumber, I know I have.

Hope someone here can relate. Why would anyone bring a child into this hellhole of a world anyway?
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Why would you want to make offspring just like you when you can't even reproduce naturally? Lmfao


Crab moment


Basado y la rojo pilled


No, I think they are cute and sweet most of the time. When they like you or are happy to see you, their smiles are so genuine and it's nice to see them grow up. I have good memories of my little brother and some of my younger cousins as babies.
I wish I had children desu, but that's never going to happen.


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>the goal of life shouldn't be to lessen suffering
It's literally the single reason you've done anything you consciously decided to do since you were born my self awareness lacking friend.

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 No.158524[Reply][Last 50 Posts]

What was your school life like? Was it hell? I came close to dropping out like four times.
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I've seen people from my high school that I kinda knew, it pretty much went similar to that, but it was more like just as I was walking by I just "hey" and gave them a little wave and head nod and kept walking, they usually just say "hey" back and we just go on our ways. Only one person actually initiated a conversation with me and he just asked if I had discord and I told him I didn't, then I asked him what he was studying and I told him what I was studying (at the time) and then I just wrapped it up, said his career sounded cool and said "see ya around", smiled, and said I had somewhere to go and walked away



TFW I will never live in a comfy abbey with other wizard friends. TFW when I will never preserve ancient knowledge through illumination nor be on the cutting edge of research in the medieval world. TFW I will never drink excellent self brewed beer made by me and other wizards.


My family moved if not every year, then every other year. I think I went through 10 schools, one of them was even back in my mother country. If that didn't happen, dunno maybe I'd be a normalfag


>maybe i will try to file a lawsuit against that school.
I don't think there's much you can do with natural statue of limitations. Proof isn't preserved, people naturally forget things.


I had to repeat my final year of mandatory schooling because I was missing .5 credits, in a specific class, and the teacher somehow got it into her head I was a literal rapist and deliberately tanked any chance of me passing. She was a old feminist cunt, and apparently didn't like young dude crass humor when she overheard me joking with friends. Not a single person took my side no matter how clearly bullshit this was, including my parents. I'll forever be mad I had to waste an extra year of my life jumping through hoops to get this last fucking useless credit.

[Last 50 Posts]


I'm a senior in high school down in New Zealand. For those who are unfamiliar, the high school system there is 6 years of primary school, followed by another 6 years of high school (4 of which are compulsory.)

I made the stupid decision to continue on to Year 12 with the impression that everything will go on smoothly. How fucking wrong I was.

I can't do it, wizards. I'm not suicidal, never have been. But I feel an overwhelming stress flow over me with the workload and the never ending threat of 'final exams'.

Alas, I have to continue. I'm over 85% done with school and there's no point in dropping out now, and being a failure (even though I already feel like one.) The best options is to tank my exams (not intentionally, but the work is very confusing) and get the handshake and piece of crummy paper telling me that I suffered through a year of exams, 'study, study, study', and other crap like that.

Sorry for the rant, wizards. Had to let it out somewhere.


I'd love to give you some advice, but I really don't feel qualified to. Just try your best to figure out what you want


Back when I when I went through the same problem as you I just flunk my exams and continue my education somewhere much much less competitive. At least get yourself a high school certificate.


It can work against you to do well at school. Perhaps the only chance in life you have is to convince doctors that you are incapable of work so you can get disability money


idk what school is like anywhere else but here in america we were still drawing with crayons and watching movies and crap by grade 12, it wasn’t hard at all, I recall hardly doing anything, every writing assignment was like a paragraph and the math teacher just let us play video games on the pc’s



It's raining. I can vividly remember that day. I was sitting alone on a bench, in the middle of the city. Coffee can in hand, I swallowed the bitter reality. Tears formed in my eyes as i contemplated leaving my job, leaving everything. I did, and I have been out of the matrix all this time. These are the memories of 2 or so years ago.

It feels good to be home on wizchan. Been a while wizards but I came back to share the things I have seen. I chose the path to wizardry. I am once a mage but I am now a sage. I came here to show the light.

The words rose from the Dead Sea. The secret words written thousands of years ago. I have seen the visions, I talked with them. I talked with Him. I studied the words. They form a string, the string of truth that plays the harmony of dissonance. The light that pierced reality showed itself to me. The shapes are in flames, written on the heavens. They glimmer, illuminating Leviathans remains. The wind blew. I thought this was my end but the voice told me that it was just beginning.

Deception, ruin, doom, destruction, restoration. The darkness will sweep them, us but we must look for the light. We shall free ourselves from te illusion of life, the transitoriness of human existence and ascend. The fate of the universe is the fate of grass but the light shines forever.

The esoteric things are revealed one by one. Careful now, my fellow mage, lest you go mad. Sanctify yourself and find the key so the silver cord may not snap. Wrap your mind's message, let it flow, to the Highest. String the words together, be good so the messengers may talk to you.

Can we alter reality? Yes. Albeit, it translates accordingly. You cannot break the number but from above, it will flow below and time will watch until the mission of the light is done.

A solitude, you showed me indeed. The path to the heavens, to the heavens of heavens. I saw the kingdoms, the empires, the king, the future. They are crying, those who are good cried for wickedness ended and are finally consoled.

Though I wallowed in existential distress, I saw it pure and true. Beyond the heavens and earth, the Abode, in all its tranquility, shown itself to me.

The rich text box cannot contain the mystyfying experience of the revelations. In another point of time, I shall again string together the words of the fragmented truths, as a sage does to influence reality.
Blessed be you my fellow sages, mages and wizPost too long. Click here to view the full text.
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Intuitively I named it a bridge, and it's precisely due to how good works are between reality and the supposed.
It's unlikely that the first brick lain was suspended in air for all castles in the sky.
Where was the forgery placed too? On a cloud?

And so I show myself handicapped, since I have little to draw from.
I guess I just wonder how so many had so much more to draw on in such a half life.

I'm not sure if another year would change things. But at least I've figured out why everything I write feels deflated.
And of course there's no need for such rigidity, as donning on seriousness leaves a frigid experience when that's the last thing anyone would want from a bridge suspended away from reality yet familiar enough to loiter around on, a respite
Not OP, but writing cope is the quickest way to reveal yourself as the dominated



The words, they are flying
They are flowing, they are singing
Paint it one way or another
In joy, in despair
Once they're there, they are part of eternity
Rejoicing for coming to be
No one, not even these walls shall stop them

Cheers, brother
OP here


words are like magic
spells to become immortal
i am here aren't i


words have an ending
if those above disagree
my post trimmed, im sad



Fear not for expressing the reality of the realms, fellow wizard
Here is a riddle for you

The light is flowing
From one realm to the next one
Passing through; a change

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Until very recently, I never realized you were supposed to sit with your legs touching other males'; I always thought there should be a small gap between people sitting on the same bench, even if they're close friends. Apparently not? This really hit me hard when I started paying attention, people touch complete randoms with their legs as if it's nothing and don't seem at all bothered by it.
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oh i dont think thats uncommon between family members and friends. i was going off strangers, say sitting on the air plane or movie theater. i cant remember someone ever deliberately resting their leg against mine, that seems gay as hell and something you would be beaten up for if the wrong person was on the other end


Had fat people on a crowded bus but they couldn't exactly help it.


Who told you that crap? That sound stupid as hell, why would anyone deliberately make a custom of touching legs with another guy? Why do they care so much? It doesnt matter if your legs touch a little or if they don't, because only an insane person would think slightly touching a stranger's legs with yours would mean anything at all. God damn.


The normalcy of physical contact depends entirely on where you live. This is the case with touching strangers and also showing physical affection with people that you know. There is huge cultural variance, even within western countries.

Generally in most places you still wont touch a stranger unless you are in a situation where you dont have much choice, like a crowded train or bus


Depends on the culture. >>182990

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Newfag here and only a 21 yr old apprentice wizard. Sorry if this is blogposty.

By typical normalfag measures I could be considered successful, I have a decent remote job, am fairly smart, have solid cryptocurrency holdings and will inherit my father's home soon.

Yet something is different about me, something deeply wrong. My parents would just assume I'm some shy shut in who will grow up eventually, my two close and only friends likely imagine I'm just some late bloomer or secretive about my relationship hunting.

I don't care. At all. I easily mask during required social interactions but at the same time I do all I can to avoid or minimize them. I cannot shake the feeling that everything I do is fake. I spend ludicrous amounts of time engrossed in detailed fantasy worlds of my own creation, blasting music with overpriced audiophile gear (a cope I'm sure) and reading. I basically spend my life at this PC reading, listening to music and occasionally engaging in parasocial activites. I regularly entertain semi-serious thoughts of suicide and have somewhat of an obssession with shifting to other worlds. I'm generally nihilistic but I maintain an open mind about metaphysics because materialism is boring and depressing. When I'm not masking one can easily tell I have flat affect, weak empathy and extreme secretiveness. I score pretty high on some of those dark triad tests which threw me at first until I realized that I'm probably a schizoid.

So here comes my main problem: relatability. I'd like to think that most wizards, crabs and autist types find themselves an "in-group" to relate to. I've encountered countless of them online and my friends are probably borderline on these categories too. But I just don't fit in at all. I don't relate to the problems of autists, crabs, robots, normies etc. Hell I usually find myself disliking them after prolonged interaction. Most of my online interactions consist of probing for information, casual and short conversation and trolling (which I do in excess and to great effect as some sort of defense mechanism for not fitting in, but I don't bully like a sociopath). I'm actually in a ton of groups with what for all intents and purposes should be likeminded individuals (failed normies, crabs, mild spergs, etc). But the very driving force behind their existence seems to be the hunt for companionship or just lust. I don't just not feel these things, I actually started to fucking hate them. I'vePost too long. Click here to view the full text.
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yeah haha *stretches* im a totally hot successful rich schizoid dark triad sociopath but im a wiz just like you ahah
where da wizbitches at


>you seem to have a strong crab bucket mentality yourself.
How does he have that?


this one hundred percent


>Sorry if this is blogposty.
>Yet something is different about me
You just haven't figured out yet that you're still chasing ideals and delusions.


you sound like a normalfag with a romanticized view of yourself as somehow being different and superior to everyone else because you're afraid of intimacy to such a degree that you've convinced yourself you don't want it. Let me guess though, your fantasy world has intimate interpersonal relationships, doesn't it? You said you'd gladly kill yourself so clearly you're depressed but in denial just like you're in denial about not desiring intimacy. You desire it but have decided it's easier to just create characters where everything always goes the way you want it to rather than having to deal with the real world where things are often uncontrollably shitty and you can end up getting hurt.

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Have you embraced solitude and how did you come about this choice if it was one and what is your story do you think your childhood lead to you being ok with being alone?

As a child my parents were split up a common theme for wizards but I consider some aspects of my childhood to be influential to my preference for isolation as an adult.
I lived with my mother full time as a child until the age of 7 and for various reasons my mother was never home so I was by myself and forbidden to leave the room I lived in.
When I started to live with my father nothing much changed except as he was sick he never got out of bed and was mostly sleeping and we lived in relative isolation away from others so I had the outdoors to explore as a child.
During schooling I was bullied a lot and was always acting up so was in detention every single day for lunch in my elementary school and this meant no other children were allowed to come near me or they would be in trouble I spent my time thinking alone.
I was also not allowed to have any friends as a child if a playmate took a liking to me when I was older my mother would tell me that not to trust the other child or make fun of them and say "wizzie you do not want to be around this child he is a loser" despite me being the biggest outcast. Of note is abuse by my parents in addition to my peers I think that played a part as well.

It is no surprise to myself that when I left schooling I withdrew from all social contact and shut myself away for numerous years and counting but I cannot help but feel that my entire younger days were preparing me to be alone because I do not feel lonely at all.
I used to enjoy talking online to some people from image boards on skype etc but I have now fully realized that there is no point in me trying to make friends with others online because it wont happen even if I wish I could I simply cannot make a friendship as if I never learnt to.
I feel more content now that I do not even bother trying to talk to others even when bored of my hobbies.

What about you wizards also sorry for the blog posting but I want to know if anyone else is similar to me. If psycho babble means anything one of my "mental disorders" is supposedly schizoid.
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i grew up in a small town, with a many friends, every day after school i played with them, we had a tree club house, a lake and sometimes we went to other towns just following the canal or the train tracks in bikes, it was the happiest time in my life
the problem started when i was 11 or 12yo, my family decided to move to the city and live in a shitty commiee block, i went from doing things with my friends outside after school all the time, to locking myself in my room to watching TV and playing the same old games over and over again
it was a very traumatizing and depressing experience, that's when i first began to contemplate suicide, i think that's what fuck me brain
but it wasn't until go to high school that i realized i was different to normies, i was very average, good in individual sports(even for a while i thought about becoming a professional tennis player), not antisocial, never was bullyed, but i didn't understand why normies were so obsessed with sucubus, sex, famous people, with belonging to a group, with being popular, with being cool, etc
eventually im isolated myself more and more, to the point that i quit school and lose my "friends"
i remember that every morning instead of going to school i went to the cybercafe to play mmorpgs, eventually my parents noticed, and they forced me to return or get a job
i got a job, i bought a pc, internet, and well, 10 years later here we are


schools are primarily about forced socialization, the education is secondary


This, they need to brainwash you into obedience, always doing what those with a higher rank tell you to do in society. And of course you need to learn to "work together" with others :^) Jesus, how great it is to live in a society nobody asked you whether you want to belong to or not. You are born, you are automatically considered a citizen who has responsibilities, duties and laws forced upon him. Life is wonderful!


>i grew up in a small town, with a many friends, every day after school i played with them, we had a tree club house, a lake and sometimes we went to other towns just following the canal or the train tracks in bikes, it was the happiest time in my life
Why is /wiz/ home of the failed normalfags now? Is /b/ not enough of a containment board?


I would say my mother always had really isolating tendencies and wouldn't let me leave. I can remember having a bike and riding it in circles in our normal sized driveway because she was afraid of letting us leave the house and yard and that pretty much continued until my early teens.

My parents are also the normie version of wizards. My mother doesn't have any friends in a city she's lived in for 15+ years and my father never had friends that I can remember aside from a few co-workers.

My mother was also fond of getting me diagnosed by various psychiatrists. The more normie ones were autism and ADHD but she also had ODD and a few more obscure mental illnesses put on me. I'm obviously a wizard so maybe some of those were accurate.

If it helps any other wizards find patterns for themselves in their upbringings, my father was really just kind of a jerk and seemed to enjoy being unpleasant to me and honestly everyone else. He went off the rails I think because we let him do it. It seems like he'll be as nasty and hurtful as we let him be. My mother believes others are conspiring against her although I think it's just a way of avoiding responsibility on her part.

Succubi have generally ignored me but when I was younger I'd rarely get some brief attention. It tended not to be positive and I think now it was just that they realized they could mess with me and get some entertainment that way.

I can't rely on my parents so I have my own money. I don't currently work but I should be soon enough. Work in a way is better than not working, I've gotten to the point where I'm unable to enjoy video games or online groups. I judge myself negatively enough that it makes being a total NEET difficult.

I drink too much. I don't know why I drink considering I hate it and I hate myself for doing it, but I do drink almost everyday. It's one of the weirder things I've had to deal with.

I guess if I had to make a complaint about life, it is that normies are unbelievably cruel. If I didn't want to work I think I'd never leave my house nor call anyone, I just don't understand why they're so needlessly hurtful.

The future is difficult, there are many things I want to do but it's hard to get the energy to do them. After burning out so many times it's hard to get the spark again.

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My wizard brothers, this is just a reminder that throughout life the only person who can truly love you and take care of you is yourself. Maybe this is not true for some but it is for most of us wizards. I don't mean this in a normie kind of way. Throughout life I have not only been outcast by society but also treated as if I was a rat. Most people would genuinely be happy I died but here I am proving to them their efforts are futile. Maybe we will never find company but that doesn't have to be a bad thing. They want us to feel ashamed of being people with their own paths because normies are sheep at the end of the day and follow the herd without ever questioning it. Do not end your precious lives over this pathetic aspect of life. If you happen to find truly good company along the way then that's fine. But stay true to yourself and make the best of your life on your own. Make art, take care of you, watch some tv series and treat yourself like a king because it's likely that no one will do the same. Ps: I'm sorry for my english not my native language


>truly love you and take care of you
Although I agree that you must take care of yourself, I think you may have invoked unnecessary ideals.
You've stumbled upon reality, despite what we're told.
Yes, people don't love. At least not the way you think they do. You aren't "unloved" while others are "loved" depending on what you define love as.
It's important to remind yourself that words shift in meanings, and with love, well, at this point… it is an empty vessel of a word to evoke a magical paradise of acceptance and so on.
Psychological currents of mutual realities we're all bound to cross along the unassuming.
Check the various definitions of love from the Greeks:

Not only are there various forms of fondness, but for every fondness, there is an agreement, by mutual interests; you invest in someone as they invest in you. You may protest and be witness to frivolous peoples who don't respect such conditions, but you'll be surprised how much such frivolousness would be to their detriment.
How much time one can waste on someone!
"I have all the time to waste" you'll throw back at me. Yeah, me too.

So yes, unconditional love does not exist - ironically even within families - and every form has its conditions.
And when you inspect it further, you realize that such conditions and conclusions may not be worth the squeeze.
Or more aptly, you could instead wonder why one garners such self-worth or pride from being wanted, when you see who else is wanted too.
And when you look at "the-wanted-ones" - well, there's a lot of discharge from such attention.

>Happiness in loneliness

Post too long. Click here to view the full text.

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I'm 22. My dad is 75 and my mom is 68.
My parents had me at old age cus muh condom failed

When I realized in primary school that all of my friends' parents were much younger than mine, I developed this nagging awareness of their mortality and it terrified me.

Pic unrelated.
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OP here and 100/100 agree.


Nobody on either side of the family has autism except one of my grandfathers.

Whose genes and personality do I inherit? One of my grandfathers. Both my parents are normies though, both my grandmothers are normies and my other grandfather is a normie.

Fuck this RNG game.


Your mom was 46 when she had you? That's actually sort of impressive. Are you autistic by any chance?


Never been diagnosed.


i had older parents also, in fact i vaguely remember my dad went to parent teacher night instead of my mom and the teacher said I had a great talk with your grandfather last night. he wore socks and sandals like an old boomer and his vocabulary is stuck in the 1950s

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Have you felt superior to normalfags cause of your interests? I always thought of myself as an intellectual better than everyone else cause of my interests, my tastes, and my ideas. For example, the fact that I listen to somewhat obscure music artists like David Thomas Broughton, The Midnight, and Sweet Trip made my value as an intelligence greater than anyone who just listens to top 40 radio stations. The same things applies with other examples of media consumption like vidya. Hell, the fact that I go on 4chan, 8ch, wizchan, made me feel like as though my wisdom of the world far exceeded those normies using shit like Snapchat and Instagram. I always thought that maintaining my identity was better than being some normalfag who go out with their friends regularly and have romantic relationships.for such a long time.I've laughed at Redditors or Facebook users for the way they act.
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>all the effing time
Go back to reddit, retard.


I've never felt anything because I don't have interests.


Normalscum thinks he's mature because he swears


"Retard" isn't a swear, it's a sentence enhancer.


Some mediums or art forms do have more value than their counterparts. If the arthouse film tells an interesting story and had a lot of thought and skill put into it while the Marvel film is just pure popcorn entertainment, then I do think you can count yourself superior for preferring the former over the latter.

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