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Disregard Females, Acquire Magic

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Does anyone else feel like they're living in a world-sized play set? A lot of events in my life, the way they play out, follow each other and "coincide" simply makes no sense. Unless there really is a cosmic deity, or a number of them, simply being fond of throwing all sorts of hurdles before me and tormenting my mind for laughs.
And there's no escape, no matter what I do. I could stay at home, and then all the sinister thoughts begin creeping inside my mind. Should I leave it, the world immediately changes to mess with whatever plans, however little, I have.
It sounds like schizo ramblings, but I swear it's all too real and suspicious to not entertain such thoughts.
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Today I had just come out of a depressed episode. Happened again. About a month ago my neighbor was taking down these massive trees on the edge of my garden. Since the trees were so old they had junk in them ( old fence, old fence wire ) and the neighbor put some of the junk in my garden and didn't take it away. I thought whatever that sucks but I will get rid of it, turns out at the exact same time my other neighbor had some plastic stuff blow out of his garden in to my garden. It looked old so I didn't think much of it. So his plastic building stuff was in the junk I got rid of, so today he talks to me and says that some plastic stuff must have blown in my garden. I'm 99% sure it's the stuff I threw away and I bet it was worth a lot of money, but now I have to tell him or lie which will unravel. As an anxious person that's not easy. THE DAY I COME OUT OF A DEPRESSED EPISODE THAT HAS LASTED SINCE MY LAST POST. These constant absurd small things that happen just in time to fuck with me, I hate it. Even if it's insane I cannot escape the feeling that I'm being punished.


Happened again. The day I come out of a depressed episode and clean the house, after I finish cleaning the kitchen the washing machine starts making an awful noise. I know from last time it's the propellor. The hose to empty the water didn't let any out, I open it, dirty water goes everywhere on the floor. There is some coins in there and thick string tied around it, so I spent 25 minutes untying and cutting this string as I sit on wet towels soaking up the water. I do it after much frustration and lean on a box to stand up, the box shatters and I fall to the ground fucking my wrist. So I lay there in dirty water staring at the ceiling. I just get sent back to a kid thinking that this is a horrible truman show.


Happened again. Today I did 6 hours of gardening because I felt better after being unable to since my last post, I lay down in the heat struggling to get to sleep, I hear a really loud wind and squeaking noise at 1am. It sounds like someone is dying or choking. I ask what the hell that is and actually my brother crushed his deodorant can in the footrest of his chair and this giant pierced can filled the entire house with the fumes. It smells everywhere even with the windows open and I can barely get to sleep because of the smell. Every time stupid shit fucking happens. Stop this show, just stop the show already.


while I was teen, I had this feelings. Like I have been living in some sort computer simulation. Weirs things were happening to me back then. That's why


>>157370 Same. Somehow this world all seems orchestrated around me. All seems pre-destined with no escape possible. Everyone is a mechanical piece in the machine that pushes me forward. Synchroniciies happen to me often. For me these are glitches in the machine giving me hints that all of this is just a big piece of software running on pre-described parameters. I don't know if this makes any sense at all. If I take this theory to its ultimum then you will all react (or not) as per the program that I seem to be the centre of.


Way back when I was in middle school and we had to do volunteering, the principal suggested given my interest in WW2, I might like volunteering at the senior center. I was sour on it at the time, but actually it makes a lot of sense.

I've found that I relate to older people more, maybe its because I'm lost in the past and more interested in their century than our own. Or maybe because I'm a person of the mind not body, I relate to people whose physical side has worn itself out.

They are the only ones still alive who care about my aspie interests, the books and magazines I want to read at the library are only checked out by seniors.

I've never went to any events specifically for seniors, but I find that everything that I show up for from the Church to activism to discussion groups are always filled with older people, with not just me, but even my dads' age being the youngest one there.

But lately there hasn't been much going on in my town. And I was thinking of volunteering at the senior center. Give me something to do. Do a good deed. And maybe get a little human interaction in a non-normie way.
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kudos to you for doing that, but I dont think Id want to do it at that terminal a stage, where it seems like more of a medical issue


Why? Seems like a waste of time.


well that begs the question of what would be worthwhile use of time.


Anything other that giving others free labor.


It depends on the old person. My family has a rampant christfag minister for one grandpa. The other shits on me for having poor career success when he drove trucks for the military for a living. There's also one more reasonable man and I've had mostly positive experiences with older people.

At the end of the day it's still another human being, you will still be rolling the dice as to whether they'll be reasonable or irredeemable garbage.

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About to get a call back for my first "real" job, it's IT tech support.
While not excited about it, it's better than a supermarket and at least it's something I'm somewhat interested in. I happen to know they run debian servers, so hopefully I can work my way up to be a comfy sysadmin or something.
Wish me luck wizzies, truly going to miss being a NEET and I hope I never sperg at work or something like that.
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>I hope this is just something you feels on the first week, and I can get through it soon.


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Yeah, I also had to drop the NEET life, I’m back at Uni now. It’s a bit frustrating and overwhelming, they give these unorthodox assignments that don’t really have much to do with anything and require a lot of creative input which make me feel like in kindergarten art classes. I’d rather just do ordinary tests and be done with it. The profs and students also make a shitload of factually incorrect statements and offer no correction. And I mean every single fucking day, it just feels useless when you go to an institution where you’re supposed to learn but it’s actually filled with a bunch of people spreading misinformation and miscorrecting you on things you aren’t actually wrong about. Also I’m treated like a pariah as usual, so I’m just keeping as quiet as possible.


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Learn to keep your mouth shut around normies. They can never understand you, so just nod and agree with whatever is prevalent. Do your fucking homework or whatever and graduate. As a uniwiz, my life is a fucking hellhole. Having to deal with normies is sapping the fuck out of my life energy and makes me want to die. I really did not know that solitude was this blissful and crucial to me. I really regret taking solitude and not having to deal with people granted. Don't make the same mistake I did and get cocky. We are all very fragile and our life situation always hangs on a slim thread.



working at a pharmacy , a literal hell here


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I see you

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Hello wizzies,

I stumbled upon an interesting podcast that I think you would also find enjoyable. A sample episode which might generate broad interest is linked here:

The podcast is about a ~50 year old man's experiences with aspergers. I myself have debilitating ASD so I found SOME aspects of his stories relatable. More importantly, I have a very strong academic interest in autism. I know in not the only autistic person here. In any case though, his commentary on social phenomena I think many of you would find interesting or relatable.

All the episodes can be found here:http://aspiecast.libsyn.com/

Disclaimer: the host is a hypersocial normalfag and not at all wizardly. So let's not argue about wizlam please. Personally I think he's an idiot in many respects and has poor character as a person.

There is an Elliot Rodger episode, for the wizkids who give a shit about that (I personally don't).
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high octane autism


Also, here is an autistic guy who makes videos and also co-hosts a podcast with, IIRC, a therapist who specializes in ASD. I'm not really into his work (seems more like a redditor than a wizard), but he is smart and eloquent and has developed a following. I believe he works a minimum wage job in Canada, despite being some sort of engineer. So he is not one of these guys with a super mild case of ASD going on about how autism is a super power and all that.


wtf? you can get disability for autism? I've always read people getting denied because it wasn't enough


succubi probably dont get diagnosed with it as much because they can just sit there and not say anything, not make eye contact, and she will just be a "shy" succubus. A succubus would have to act up really badly for her patents to bring her to a doctor and say something is wrong. Even if they can tell she has autism or at least on the spectrum somehow, its more passable with succubi.


Her level of autism is interesting, and it seems to me, not really discussed all that much in the media. They usually seem to show either adults who aren't toilet trained or married computer scientists who are a little quirky.

Her verbal IQ is in the high 130s, but some of the other areas of her IQ results are, IIRC, in the 60s and 70s. Then, on top of that, factor in how her 24/7 anxiety and OCD further inhibit daily functioning. Her verbal skills to some extent hide her very real problems with meeting the requirements of day to day life. There are much worse problems to have in this world, but this is still a recipe for severe frustration and maybe even despair. Luckily she's in England rather than being forced to fend for herself in a more unforgiving country.

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Anyone else thought of the internet as just this one big MMO? It’s all just a game?


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 No.150776[Reply][Last 50 Posts]

Does anyone here in the USA have food, housing and money provided to them by the government due to a successful disability claim?

How much do you get per month, and what is the standard of living like? Also, what are the financial requirements, such as maximum assets allowed, or required attempts to gain employment?

I'm sure I could get on disability with a good lawyer, but I am reluctant to do so yet due to the time and money required to prove I have autism and drag it through court, and am worried that they'll just put me in a shithole apartment in a shithole neighborhood, can't have more then $2000 saved and only afford shit quality food. If that's the case then I'd just stay with my parents and ride it out 'till the wheels fall off.
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Lottery fantasies seems more acceptable


Why is the cat called Tablescraps?




How can I make a little money with minimal effort without wageslaving?


I have a PIP assessment coming up soon and I'm trying to get it so I can move out and find my own place (need assisted living and PIP makes that happen in the UK).

What's other wizzies experiences with moving out?

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I'm almost 24 but can only like succubi 8 to 13 . I correctly see this as a problem and I thus asked for help:my doctor will give me bupropion
Is it true that this will make me suicidal?he said it will help stop obsession over children
Please help me,I don't want to become a child-linguiere catalog collector


Don't trust pharma hacks ever.


My situation is crippling,I can't use my school teacher diploma because primary school arouses me

I can't work,I struggle ,I need meds


i refuse to think you're being serious, but you do come across as willing to do as told, so just take the good boy meds?


Moved to >>>/dep/207947.

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Look, I ve never been to psychiatrist neither psychologist. But I know that something wrong with me, I know for sure that I had strong social phobia for many years and perhaps I may have aspergers syndrome and some kind of neurosis? Also I m introverted male. I ve never had any friend.

I wonder if I go to psychiatrist and I wont be quite honest to him. What would happen?

Would he find out that I m laying even if I would say logical things to him, or he wouldnt find out it?
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Imagine being so pea-brained as to believe that you can reduce the causes of complex psychological states to something like excessive wanking. All of these supposed positive changes could be attributed to a simple psychological placebo caused by the hyped up expectations, like 'your world suddenly becoming beautiful'.

You have to be a seriously deranged masturbator for NoFap to cause any kind of actual meaningful psychological reorganization.


>You have to be a seriously deranged masturbator for NoFap to cause any kind of actual meaningful psychological reorganization.
Not that I want to advocate nofap, but people who frequent places like wizchan tend to be pretty excessive masturbators.


I think a lot of us don't have friends because we're embarrassed about the state of our life and suspicious that people might pretend to be our friends to exploit us. That's generally why I don't go out of my way to try to make friends, and only give basic courtesy when others initiate interactions with me. I think my nervous smile gives off the impression I'm not comfortable even though I am not outwardly hostile so that people realize to not press too much


>go on le nofap fourms
>90% are relapse posts


my last one totally nailed me but I Think it was just lucky guess he had from previous patients
also as >>160200 says
>will make you feel like absolute shit

I dont know why some feel like it beneficial to push you to the brink of collapse while you already feel like shit

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 No.144059[Reply][Last 50 Posts]

What's your opinion on serving in the military? I know there's been some military wizards on here before, so I guess I was curious about your experiences if you have had any. Though there's a lot of 3rd world wizards who browse here, I guess this is obviously geared towards experiences in the western militaries. Or we could just have a general /mil/ thread for discussing topics and stuff.
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Most of them have "off the street" programs where you can get a guaranteed attempt at their assessment & selection course in your contract (others require you to have served for a few years first, and/or be a certain rank before you can try out). You still have to meet all of the necessary prerequisites & go through all of your initial training/screenings before you get to the selection course. Often times, but not always, assuming you didn't already get it in your contract, you get offered the chance to volunteer to go to selection at some point during your initial training.

Frequently (but not always), the contracts are set up in such a way that if you fail, whatever branch you're in gets to do whatever the fuck they want with you, which generally means getting stuck in a shitscrubber job (this is half the reason these contracts exist, since the overwhelming majority of people are going to fail selection–it's basically an open contract). If you fail, but not by quitting, they'll typically at least put you in infantry (depending on the branch) rather than making you a cook or whatever. If you fall out due to injury, you'll generally get the chance to try again.


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I'm actually going to be talking to a recruiter tomorrow. I wanted to join years ago, but basically got afraid and backed out. Now that I've grown a bit older and have seen the horrors of life, I feel that I have no other choice. They might finally turn me into someone that I can love


why would anyone with a sane mind join amerimutt military unless they are poor?


early retirement

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 No.150538[Reply][Last 50 Posts]

are there any fellow neets who are thinking about becoming criminal? who wants to become powerful, self-sufficient, and self-controlling? Sadly, I'm too weak to go down thsi road by myself, and would like to have someone I can lean on, but im friendless.
Would at least like to have a friend who considers himself a bit immoral (one who might not have the values of a normie).
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We're talking about weed here, I know sellers who've been caught with more then a pound (in ounce bags divided up even) and slapped with probation. It's more or less legal in the United States, the rewards greatly outweigh the risks. It's decriminalized in the majority of the states here; the absolute worst case scenario legally would be 6 months for distributing and selling. I'm willing to risk 6 months of freedom to make $5000/month, easily. Every month I do this I'm saving myself 625 hours of labour that a wageslave would do. I own a home now, have a vehicle and have money set aside through family in case anything goes awry. I have zero intention to work and this is how you escape neetdom when you have no one else to rely on and the government won't give you disability; although I'm still trying to get on disability myself.


Something tells me you're not a wizard.


On what scale? Stealing a tall boy cause I am shaking with withdrawal?¿
Like top level of a racket or a ponzi scheme? Pillage.. rape.. blackmail.. oppress.. deny.. execute? DNM Administrator or literal government hitman at a prison? Which is worse? The latter is legal..! Thats what they did 2000 years ago.. how archaic.. the old sentence to death at a corrupt citizens' court..


Imagine not being a wizard


I think what op is saying is that that's the whole appeal. To be a simple brute, a man of action that doesn't consider the consequences or the possible outcomes. He just does it.

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